Welcome to Wrexham (2022) s01e08 Episode Script

1
ROB: Hi, Ryan.
RYAN: How we doing?
Hey, you're co
you're a little chilly.
Chilly?
Yeah, a little nervous.
- Nervous?
- Yeah.
First game.
- Mm-hmm.
And it's an away game.
- Yes.
- Not, like, a friendly crowd.
We'll see, but
[indistinct chatter]
[upbeat music]
ROB: I don't know
that I'm expecting
any kind of animosity,
specifically towards us.
Maybe towards the
Shanked with a broken bottle
or something.
Well, I guess
it's all fair game.
Yeah.
Exciting.
ROB: It is exciting.
All right. Hi.
PERSON:
Come on through.
Here we go.
Welcome to Maidenhead United.
ROB:
Thank you.
Yeah.
[indistinct chatter]
SHAUN: On a scale of one
to ten, how excited are you?
SHAUN:
It's brilliant, innit?
We're good.
I don't know where we're going.
So we'll just follow you.
ROB: Lead the way.
[crowd booing and jeering]
BUDDY HOLLY [singing]:
Every day
It's a-getting closer
Going faster
than a roller coaster
Love like yours
will surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Every day,
it's a-getting faster
Everyone said,
"Go ahead and ask her"
Love like yours
will surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Love like yours
will surely come my way
[indistinct chatter, laughter]
Listen, it's been,
by no means,
an easy run so far, has it?
PERSON: Not at all.
- Do you know what I mean?
PERSON:
II think he
For crying out loud.
PERSON:
Yeah, but the way he plays
[bright orchestral music]
I mean, do you wanna go back
to having shit plays
and no money in the bank?
[light music]
[indistinct chatter]
ATTENDANT:
You'll be in screen three.
PATRON:
Mm-hmm.
[indistinct chatter]
PATRON:
All right, thank you.
We're here, guys,
here at the premiere
of, uh
what's it called again?
PATRON:
"What's it called again?"
Uh, Free Guy, uh,
drinking some free beer,
so thanks to my mate Ryan. Cheers.
[speaking Welsh]
SHAUN: Never has there been
a film premiere
in Wrexham before.
He came back to me
when he saw the picture.
He said, uh, "Who's the guy
in the big necklace?"
[gasps] Wrexham!
I wish I could be there
with you all tonight.
Um, I cannot wait
to finally make it there,
but, uh, in the meantime,
I hope you enjoy this film
as much
as we enjoyed making it.
Uh, as Guy would say,
"Don't be a good guy.
Be a great guy."
[indistinct chatter]
[crowd cheers]
[indistinct chatter]
PHIL:
Okay, boys.
Today is a few reminders
of what we need to do
going into next week
and the coming games.
Did they work hard to stop us,
or did we just not quite make
our system work?
I think it was more us
than them.
ROB: One thing that we have
definitely noticed
is that Phil's vernacular
changes, uh,
from when he is
in real life
Any support you need, you know
we're right behind you, my son.
Thanks for that, Phil.
Appreciate it.
Thank you very much.
ROB:
He's really quite reserved
and measured, kind of quiet.
Genteel, almost.
But during the games,
in the locker room,
he can be
First of all,
win the fucking battle.
ROB:
Enthusiastic?
We are fucking miles better
than that!
We look like a team of fucking
fanny fucking footballers!
ROB: And definitely
with the referees,
he's exceptionally enthusiastic.
That's a fucking joke!
Fucking hell!
Fuck off! Fuck off!
It's our free kick!
Hey!
It's our fucking free kick!
RYAN: Uh, but again,
you know, in real life,
he's just
he's not really like that.
PHIL:
Get the balls, David.
I'm loving that, son.
Your attitude's brilliant.
It's been a strange
season in many ways,
where the performance levels
have been good,
but we've struggled
to really kill teams off.
PERSON: Yalla, yalla.
[whistle blows]
PERSON:
Yes.
PHIL:
I speak to a lot of supporters
in and around the ground,
and sometimes
it's easier to say,
"Oh, we need another player.
We need this, this."
But, you know, can we get more
out of the players we've got?
Yeah, push past it! Good.
PERSON: Yes.
PHIL:
Tremendous, sunshine. Good lad.
[Benny Tones' "Home"]
[players shouting indistinctly]
PERSON:
Run up!
BENNY [singing]:
Cross these streets
Gon' cross the sea
I'ma make my way back home
BENNY [singing]:
Make my way back home
Kickin' that can
AARON: The sound from
the Racecourse Ground is mad.
Just makes me
wanna go out there
and do so well
for the fans.
[indistinct shouting]
At some point,
something's gonna give.
BENNY [singing]:
I'm gonna make my way back home
I'm gonna make my way
back home
AARON: All right,
so this is my mirror.
I made it myself. [laughs]
That's why it looks
a bit like
it looks a bit bootleg.
I like to trim before games
just so I'm fresh
and ready to go.
[trimmer buzzing]
But yeah,
I find it therapeutic.
But the whole thing is,
you've got to try
and get it even on both sides.
And then I don't know if you've
ever trimmed your hair,
everything's back to front,
so left is right,
and right is left, so
your brain takes a while
to get adjusted to that.
I know I'm doing
an all right job now,
because no one says to me,
"Oh, have you trimmed
your hair yourself?"
Gives me confidence, that,
especially when you see people
go, "Oh, you got a fresh trim?"
[speaking indistinctly]
[soft music]
If you're not confident,
you might as well not even
touch your head.
I've been struggling a lot
this season
to find my flow
in the team.
I feel like I've kind of
let the people down.
[babbles]
AARON: Hello, baby.
Is your daddy trimming?
Can you tidy up a little bit,
theyour mustache, then?
Ugh.
You always ask me, "What do
you want?"
and then you
AARON: No, I'm joking.
I'llI'll clean up
my mustache.
Yeah?
AARON: Yeah.
I'm happy with that.
All right, see you in a bit.
AARON:
See you in a bit.
PERSON:
Should we go and see Mommy?
[phone chimes]
AARON:
Hello?
Yeah, it does look nice.
It looks really nice.
No, you did look rough,
but you look good now.
You look really nice.
All right, then,
have a great game.
- Bye. Love you.
- Bye. Love you too.
PERSON: Bye.
AARON: Bye, baby.
PERSON:
Say bye to Daddy.
AARON: Be good.
PERSON: Say bye-bye.
AARON:
Bye.
PERSON:
Say bye-bye.
PERSON: Welcome to the fun bus, everybody.
Aye, our fun bus.
PERSON:
In the early days with my job,
I realized that we didn't
provide any away travel
forfor wheelchair users.
With the accessible
away travel,
we take four wheelchair users
and their carers to
at the moment, we're doing
about 12 games a season,
so we cover half
of the away season,
making it easier for people
to attend Wrexham Football Club
and enjoyenjoy football.
It's a very, very special service.
The drive has been seeing
the difference that you make.
Even the smallest of changes
makes such a huge impact
on people that you're trying
to help.
ALL [singing]:
Oh, Wrexham, we love you
PERSON:
Yay!
[soft music]
MARK:
My name is Mark Vaughn.
I'm the coach driver
for Wrexham AFC Football Club.
I have been driving the team
now for
this'll be my fourth season
coming up.
Everybody wants to play for
Wrexham when they're young,
so it's always been
a lifelong ambition of mine
to sort of
when I started driving,
to drive a team coach,
and it's just, pff,
a dream come true
for me like this, obviously.
I'm not a driver.
I'mI'm part of the team.
I'm a team member.
Two of my lads there.
How are you doing? All right?
[The Hoof's "We Play to Win"]
PERSON: Phil Parkinson
is taking his side
on the road today
for a Tuesday night fixture
against Maidenhead United.
Wrexham, currently sitting
in 11th in the league,
should do well
against the Maidenhead team
that has struggled and finds
itself down in 19th place.
Come on, Wrexham!
PERSON: Yeah, baby.
ROB: Away game culture
in English football
is unlike anything
that we have in America.
RYAN: Every single Tuesday
night or Saturday morning,
you get hundreds of people
that are gonna pile
onto a bus,
and they will drive for hours.
[horn honking]
ROB: Maidenhead is 3 1/2
to 4 hours away from Wrexham,
and along the way,
they'll talk; they'll sing.
ALL:
Wrexham, Wrexham!
ROB:
They may or may not drink,
although they're probably drinking.
Uh, and they'll watch the game
for two hours,
and then they'll drive
3 1/2 to 4 hours back
on a Tuesday night.
RYAN: So we've been dying
to get over for a game,
and it just so happens
that the first one
that we're able to attend
is in fact Maidenhead.
So that's an away game, but
it's super close to London,
and it just made total sense.
So Rob's flight
is about 12 hours, uh,
from Los Angeles.
My flight's about six
from New York.
ROB: He's only traveling
one hour longer
than those fans from Wrexham.
Pretty amazing.
We are here. It's pretty wild.
RYAN:
What is your prediction?
3-nil.
[bright orchestral music]
Wow.
I'm goingmy prediction,
uh, Wrexham versus Maidenhead,
I would
I'm gonna say 2-1.
[bright orchestral music]
- 2-1.
- 2-1 Wrexham.
PERSON:
You heard it here first.
Okay.
[tense music]
You know, the aim is,
can we get into January,
you know, right in the mix
at the top end of the table?
ANNOUNCER 1: Understanding,
I think there's probably
about 450, 500 Wrexham fans
down on a Tuesday night
to leafy Berkshire.
It's just one hell
of a turnout.
ANNOUNCER 2:
Sorry to, uh, be distracted,
'cause guess who's turned up.
[Fat Boy Slim's
"Weapon of Choice"]
Ryan Reynolds
and Rob McElhenney.
PERSON: Go
CROWD: Wrexham, Wrexham!
Wrexham, Wrexham, Wrexham!
We are Wrexham,
super Wrexham!
We're gonna win the league!
[cheers and applause]
ANNOUNCER 2: We'll have
to focus on the football
at some point,
but, uh, well,
who knew they'd turn up
to this match?
ANNOUNCER 1: As you can hear
in the background
hopefully you can hear us,
because that's the Wrexham
fans in full voice.
They've got a real buzz here.
The owners are in town.
RYAN:
Which team is Wrexham?
[laughs]
PERSON: Go, boys!
ANNOUNCER 2: Wrexham will be
in their green kit.
Maidenhead are playing
in black and white stripes.
They've got their owners
right here,
and for the first time,
they'll be able to perform
in front of the
Ryan and Rob.
Here you go.
Wrexham feeding it back
to Aaron Hayden.
And he stands up
the big guy, McAlinden.
ANNOUNCER 1:
Dribbles through two players.
Gets two off the byline.
Attacking throw-in.
How do they determine, then,
where's the ball thrown,
and is it just point of exit?
- Yeah, wherever it goes out.
- And who makes that call, him?
SHAUN: Yeah,
he decides which way it is,
whichwhich team.
RYAN: Uh, Mullin has such a,
like, distinctive gait.
ROB: Yes, he does.
RYAN: The way he runs
with his head
sort of hunched over.
[dramatic music]
CROWD: Oh!
[applause]
- Nice, Dibs.
- Whoa.
Nice, Dibs.
[whistle blows]
ANNOUNCER 2: Forward touch,
and Brisley tries to clear
and takes a body ricochet
for Wrexham
and opens it well
to find Mendy,
who works it
over to the left.
Kelly now attacking in
from the box.
Takes on French again.
French makes it
[cheers and applause]
And Maidenhead take the lead!
A diving header
from six yards out.
[bright orchestral music]
[buzzer blares]
ANNOUNCER 1:
Rob and Ryan will find out
what this team is
made of now.
ANNOUNCER 2:
Mullin will keep scrapping.
He wins a good header.
It's cleared by Upward,
who's a bright star.
And now Smith
using his weight.
As Reckord and Brisley
get in each other's way,
Smith gets past 'em.
He's got players in support
on the edge of the area.
He helps it out wide.
It's all back
[cheers and applause]
Driven in! And it's in!
2-nil.
Unbelievable, this!
[bright orchestral music]
[buzzer blares]
I said 2-1 Wrexham, right?
Or did I say Maidenhead?
Yeah, you did.
Yeah, youyou were wrong.
We were
we were both wrong already.
- Yeah.
- And we're only 22 minutes
in to the game.
[tense percussive music]
CROWD: Whoa!
- Ooh, Jesus Christ.
ANNOUNCER 1: That could so
easily have been an on goal.
[players shouting indistinctly]
[whistle blows]
PHIL:
Hey! There's nothing in it!
Fuck off.
There's nothing in it!
[indistinct arguing]
ANNOUNCER 2: No.
ANNOUNCER 1: A red card.
Hosannah has been sent off.
PHIL:
Ref, Ref, did you see that?
Are you kidding?
So now we're down 2-0 with
HUMPHREY: Ten men.
- One fewer player.
RYAN:
This is a real underdog story.
[crowd singing]
What am I getting shit
shit-talked there for?
Ryan Reynolds, what?
HUMPHREY:
Youyou bought the wrong club.
Oh.
ANNOUNCER 1: Mullin on his
own, being manhandled.
PHIL:
Fucking hell!
ANNOUNCER 1: Sheckleford,
who plays the ball through.
And in the end,
Dibble has to come
to the edge of his box
just to get there.
PHIL: Fucking okay,
come on, Paul.
ANNOUNCER 1:
Mullin running at the defense.
He's got options either way,
and he's body checked,
but the ref doesn't give it.
Did he not just get fucking
elbowed in the face?
ANNOUNCER 1:
As a hush comes over the crowd
as the ball is swept in.
ANNOUNCER 2: Under the bar,
Dibble takes that round.
[indistinct speech]
Hayden has a heavy touch.
And he's dispossessed now.
It's Kelly bursting in
behind the defense.
ANNOUNCER 1: It's like
amateur hour at the moment.
I mean,
Hayden had such a heavy touch.
ANNOUNCER 2:
Davies driving forwards.
Ah, he stumbles, though.
Gets a free kick.
[cheers and applause]
So Davies over this.
[whistle blows]
Davies gets the go-ahead,
steps up,
dinks it into the far post.
It drops loose!
[thuds echoing]
And it's in!
[cheers and applause]
Brisley headed it
against the bar.
Mullin's claiming it.
CROWD [singing]:
He plays in red and white
He's fucking dynamite
We've got Super Paul Mullin
We've got Super Paul Mullin
[whistle blows]
ANNOUNCER 2: And the referee
decides that's halftime.
Well,
listen to the Wrexham fans.
Who'd have thought it?
Crazy stuff, but somehow
Wrexham are still in it.
So 2-1 is better than 2-0.
CROWD:
Wrexham, Wrexham!
PHIL: Think we can get
back in it, lads?
PLAYER: Yeah.
PHIL: Fucking right.
Fucking right,
they're fucking on their last
bastard legs already.
Fucking stupid boot
in the fucking ball.
Fucking stupid foul, McA.
Do you want us to go down
to fucking nine men?
We're fucking gonna get back
in the game.
I fucking think
we can fucking win it,
never mind fucking draw it.
Keep your cool. Keep your cool.
But stay in fucking challenges.
We've dangled our fucking foot
too many fucking times,
haven't we?
Toz, McA,
too many little fucking things.
And then they're fucking
they're attacking us.
Come on. You gotta be strong,
physical, but in control.
Let's go make it happen, then.
PLAYER: Come on!
PHIL:
Come on, come on.
ANNOUNCER 1: We're still
under it a bit here,
obviously,
'cause of the ten men.
One goal. One goal.
[exciting music]
ANNOUNCER 1: Drives it
back over the top, Mullin!
And they're chased
into the area here.
[speaking indistinctly]
Mullin beats his man.
RYAN: See, we're on
the downhill side now.
ANNOUNCER 1: Wrexham with the
ball back from the throw-in.
Angus in the corner
of the box,
surrounded by defenders
as well,
finds Davies,
shooting position.
[cheers and applause]
Jordan Davies! Scream it.
CROWD: Wrexham, Wrexham,
Wrexham, Wrexham!
ANNOUNCER 1: Oh, my word.
ROB: Wow.
ANNOUNCER 1:
What a strike.
High fives going on
in the American box there.
Well, that's not
how we celebrate here.
We just make the noise.
CROWD [singing]: Jordan Davies,
he's one of our own
He's one of our own
This is a fun game.
- [laughs] No, it's not.
- This is a very fun game.
- It is not fun!
- No, it's terrible.
There's nothing fun
about this!
[whistle blows]
CROWD:
Wrexham, Wrexham!
ANNOUNCER 1:
[indistinct] upwards.
He's found some
Ah!
ANNOUNCER 2: A wide cross,
comes in dangerously,
ricochets across Smith,
gonna hit this, puts it
well over the bar, though.
My heart can't take this.
ANNOUNCER 2:
He swings it in.
This time,
headed to the far post.
Hayden nearly got there.
Oh, that's agonizingly close
for Aaron Hayden.
He's desperate to make up
for those earlier mistakes.
ANNOUNCER 1: Some are fighting
to win it back.
And is it a freewell, surely
that's a free kick to Wrexham.
[crowd shouting]
Come on!
ANNOUNCER 1:
Was there a stamp in there?
Hey, Paul, stand up for me,
would you?
There you go.
ANNOUNCER 1: The ref is not
gonna do anything about it.
ROB: Shake it off.
ANNOUNCER 1: Now Mullin
deep in his own half
and drive forwards,
and he's breaking down
the right-hand side.
Fabulous stuff for Mullin, that.
They win the throw-in.
[applause]
[indistinct speech]
Oh, dear, it's, uh, well over.
Very powerful,
but not troubling the keeper.
The Maidenhead keeper
sends it to midfield.
Oh, it's a good ball!
Over the top.
Going to Kelly.
Aaron Hayden's got back,
but he's overshot the ball!
Can he recover? It's too late!
He hits it.
[tense music]
Oh, what a goal!
[cheers and applause]
- Fucking hell!
ANNOUNCER 1:
Unbelievable strike.
Sweeping into the bottom right corner.
And Wrexham are behind again.
PHIL:
Fucking headers.
[whistle blows]
ANNOUNCER 1:
That is the final whistle.
The Maidenhead fans
are delighted.
Wrexham's
in a horrible performance.
[Volta Jazz's "Djougou Toro"]
Of our players, Hayden had
a disappointing game.
Despite Jordan's performance,
it wasn't enough.
On paper,
Maidenhead United are a side
we should be beating.
But that's a story Wrexham
fans know all too well.
Welcome to Wrexham,
Ryan and Rob.
[applause]
RYAN:
Thanks, buddy.
PERSON: [speaking indistinctly]
RYAN: Yeah.
ROB:
Good match. Good game.
Good game. Good game.
Good game.
RYAN: Good match, guys.
ROB:
Good game, fellas.
Okay.
RYAN: We're all right.
- [giggles]
- It's all right.
ROB: Yeah.
- You know.
ROB:
All right. Thanks, bud.
PERSON: We'll talk, yeah?
ROB: All right.
Fucking hell.
ROB: [laughs]
SINGER:
[singing in native language]
Yeah, I mean, um
ANNOUNCER 1:
And with that result
now in the record books,
Wrexham remains stuck frustratingly
in 11th place in the table.
Ah, it's, well
[speaking indistinctly]
I don't know how people
do this.
It's heartbreaking.
ROB: It's heartbreaking.
- That was heartbreaking.
- Yeah.
SINGER:
[singing in native language]
ROB: My American optimism
and your Canadian pragmatism,
uh, both fucked us.
RYAN: Yeah, they really did.
ROB: Yeah.
RYAN:
Jesus.
ROB:
Look. [sighs]
You can't taste the sweet
until you taste the sour,
I guess.
RYAN: You're not gonna talk
like this for four hours,
are you?
[light music]
[child giggles, seagull cries]