Wizards (2020) s01e08 Episode Script

1
Meow.
[Douxie whistling]
[theme music playing]
[Merlin's voice] I fear it's not
a question of where, but rather when.
Welcome back to the 21st century!
Ah! Sweet, sweet pollution.
How I missed you!
[inhales, coughs]
-[phone chimes]
-Heh! And reception! Hot dang!
-[chiming continues]
-So many messages.
[yelling]
Jim!
Hold on, please!
Man, oh, man! Can this get any worse?
[screams]
[whimpers]
[Merlin] We must escape the Arcane Order!
Camelot is lost!
Does this castle have
any safety features?
Yes. I designed a state-of-the-art
crashing mechanism.
[crashing]
[grunting]
-Need a lift?
-Douxie!
-But you're trapped in the past!
-Not anymore.
Took you long enough.
-We have much to talk about.
-[Toby grunts]
Oh, no, Jimbo!
What's happening to him?
The shard, it's moving to his heart.
I'm getting everyone home safe,
as promised.
Not yet! We're missing one!
Merlin!
-[sighs]
-Star light, star bright,
grant me this wish by night:
that I'll never have to go
back to school.
[crashing]
I have magic powers!
-Oh, I also wish for eye lasers!
-[car alarm blaring]
[grunting] Oh!
[chuckles] I guess school's out
for the ever.
Aw, man, I never cleaned out my locker!
Your beautiful school home was crushed.
So [chuckles] now that
we've cheated death, quick Q.
-Who's the little magic plant lady?
-Nari.
She renounced the Arcane Order
and sought asylum in Camelot.
[grunting]
[yelling]
Jim! Hold on!
Poor soul. Your corruption
-[gasps] I feel it worsening!
-[gasps]
Jim hurt. Dying.
There has to be something we can do.
I told you nine centuries ago,
there isn't.
You remember what happened?
Like it was yesterday,
which, for you, it was.
I know it was a hard choice,
but you did the right thing
for the sake of the world.
[castle whooshes]
-[Jim screams]
-[Claire] We've gotta get him out of here!
Stop! The shard's creeping
towards his heart again!
Nari, come back to us
and finish the work you have begun!
You misunderstand our grand vision.
They are under our protection.
If you want them,
you've gotta get through us!
So be it.
[grunts, yells]
[Toby grunting]
[Steve yelling, squeals]
[Aaarrrgghh roars, grunts]
[Green Knight] Nari, Trollhunter,
you are mine.
[grunting]
[roars]
-[guitar riff plays]
-[grunts]
[yells]
[both grunt]
-[groans]
-[Merlin] We're outmatched!
Everyone, fall back!
[Douxie] He's unstoppable.
We need an edge.
I'm sorry, Claire. [screams]
No! You can't! Jim!
-It's the only way!
-No! No, Jim!
[yells]
No, Master Jim!
[roars]
-[screams]
-Run!
No! Jim!
We have to go! He's buying us time!
[Claire grunts]
[Green Knight grunting]
[roars]
[whimpers]
[Green Knight] Yield, beast.
[grunts] Take him with us.
Listen, everyone.
The world's ending again.
Go home. School's canceled anyway.
[both gasp]
[Steve] Oh, this was a bad place to hide.
Ah! Oh, it smells!
-Ow! [sputters, coughs]
-[liquid sloshes]
Ah! The blue liquid! It's in my mouth!
It's in my mouth!
[groaning, crying]
There was nothing we could do!
We'll go back for him, I promise.
We can't. We must hide Nari.
There's more at stake than you know.
-The Trollhunter--
-Don't you talk to me about Jim!
Oh, Master Jim! We are lost without him.
We must seek refuge to regroup,
form a plan to save him.
-Where?
-[Steve] Get me out of here!
It's in my mouth!
The Order has roamed this planet
for centuries.
-[Steve screams, grunts]
-They know all my places of power.
I know a place with plenty of power
where the Order's magic won't find us.
[Steve] Pepper Pepperjack? [groans]
Where's Pepperjack?
There you go.
Hex Tech appreciates your patronage.
-[screen beeps]
-Serving number 66.
Ay ay ay!
How can I make your day magical, sir?
I need spare parts for, uh my dad.
An apple a-a-a day
k-keeps the doctor away.
What are you looking at?
It's my head, isn't it?
[sighs] Not the weirdest thing
I've seen today.
[nervous chuckle] Do you carry
transdimensional processors?
Zoe! [chuckles]
We need a place to lay low.
Hisirdoux Casperan!
You have a lot of nerve.
Yes, like cutting in line.
We were supposed to hunt niffins
and get burgers, remember?
And you are supposed to help me
with my problem, remember?
Toby! What are you doing here?
Evil wizards shot down our time-traveling
castle and stole Monster Jimbo!
Ugh. Come on, let's head to the back.
-[door beeps]
-[Aaarrrgghh gasps]
Whoa! Magic door!
What are we doing here?
We're not safe in this toy store.
Yeesh! You brought your boss here?
We're closed
to privileged Arthurian toolbags.
-[Merlin chuckles] No.
-Come on, Krel. We're on a mission.
Wait! Seems I missed a lot.
[scoffs] Wait!
What about my techie problem? Ah!
[grumbles in German]
Welcome to the real Hex Tech.
Back here we charm
the mortals' electronics into shape
and use the cash to fund
our own mystical pursuits.
[gasps]
Hex Tech is run entirely
by underground hedge wizards.
Uh-huh. Did you try unplugging it
and plugging it back in?
[man on phone] Oh, yeah!
That did the trick!
Presto! Have a magical day.
-[door beeps]
-[gasps] Dude, this place is sick!
-Was that an antigravity ray?
-[both chuckling]
You guys should be safe here.
I have to go back.
Do not break anything.
Anything in here that can stop
some ancient evil wizards?
It'll be nice to have a moment
to catch our breath.
If the Order has their way,
we won't be breathing at all.
Nari, tell them what we're up against.
Since the beginning,
the Order has always sought to protect
the balance of magic and mortal,
no matter the cost.
-But our actions only brought pain.
-[people screaming]
[Merlin] I've spent a millennium
keeping their horrors at bay.
But it wasn't enough.
Bellroc and Skrael believe
humanity is lost, beyond correction.
Now they wish to end it all.
-They search for the Genesis Seals.
-[Aaarrrgghh] Hmm! Huh.
What are the Seals?
Cute but deadly sea mammals, duh.
[Douxie chuckles] You wish.
It's the oldest tale in the wizards books.
Primal seals that contain
the very essence of magic.
[Merlin] If the Seals are broken
then raw, uncontrolled magic
shall rise upon the world,
wiping it like a flood.
Come on! Destroying the world? Again?
Ugh, can't these bad guys
just remodel a continent
or do something nice for once?
All of the Arcane Order must be present
to open the Seals.
That is why I fled.
I've hidden the Seals away,
but we must keep Bellroc and Skrael
away from them and Nari,
or it is the end of all things.
But if they're after her,
why do they need Jim?
[roars]
[Green Knight] I've been hunting you,
beast.
-You ran
-[roars]
but my mark finally took you.
You're nothing but Merlin's dog.
[roars, whimpers]
[Green Knight] The amulet--
it's only ever brought you pain.
Give it to me.
[roars]
[whimpers]
[Bellroc] The amulet--
made from the last remaining piece of her.
With it
We return her to this world.
[both] Tata Om Bekanze Maha Randza!
Thou who sleeps but yearns to slay,
heed the call, rise up, obey.
[Bellroc] Travel through the shadow door,
assemble flesh and walk once more!
[coughing]
No! Please.
My torment had ended.
It was so quiet, so peaceful.
[Bellroc] Recover your strength, Morgana.
The Shadow Realm
has taken its toll on you.
You never finished your purpose--
to make things right,
to fix the balance.
No more half-measures.
Now we walk a new path
to remake the world.
I already tried once,
and I lost everything.
Please send me back. Why me?
In truth, it was our Green Knight
who convinced us to return you.
-Do you not recognize him?
-[gasps] What?
[Green Knight] Now we finish
what we began together.
We must search the source
of Master Jim's corruption.
-Try "Rasputin Theurgy."
-Nothing.
Let me see that.
Curse you, auto-correct!
I empathize, Miss Claire,
but we cannot go back to save him.
Come on, this is our friend
we're talking about!
Your Trollhunter!
You want us to just forget about him?
No way!
Surely there's something that we can do--
[Merlin] The risk is too great
for a rescue!
We must keep Nari safe from the Order.
The fate of existence is at stake!
This is why nobody likes you, dude!
I care not for your "likes."
James Lake is corrupted, gone!
There is no bringing him back!
Or you're just too stubborn to try!
Please, you both have solid points.
My presence causes such discord.
I have put you all in danger.
No worries, veggie lady.
You are under the protection
of the Knights of Arcadia,
which is only me, currently.
I will not jeopardize
the mortal plane for one Troll!
It's what he'd do for us.
And look where that got him!
-What?
-[energy surges]
Come on, back me up, here! Anybody?
-Archie?
-Don't look at me.
Cats don't have the right to vote.
Neither do dragons.
-Yet.
-Wait a tick.
I know a way we can rescue Jim
without risking the world.
-Is that so?
-How?
And if it works, it will be
quite the little magic trick.
[Merlin] I have concerns
about this cockamamy plan of yours.
We're headed right into the lion's den.
You gave me a staff
because you trusted me, right?
-So, trust me.
-Very well.
I stand by your decision wizard.
Everyone knows what they need to do.
If we pull this off, we'll get Jim back.
Arcane Order!
We're here to barter!
And that means "come in."
Wait, we're flying
into the bitey devil castle?
Ow!
Uh, this is supes dumb.
Like, even I know it's dumb,
and we're still gonna go inside?
It's quiet, isn't it?
Good evening, Skrael.
Surrendering already?
I was hoping for a little more
cat and mouse.
You will be rewarded
with a quick and painful death.
[Green Knight growling]
A fight here will end poorly
for all of us.
We seek a truce.
[gasps, exhales]
Go on, Hisirdoux.
Good evening,
doers of evil and ancient terrors.
We have a proposal: a trade.
One of yours for one of ours.
Our missing third in exchange
for your Troll mongrel?
You would give up your only advantage?
What does this gain you?
Yes, well, an excellent question,
one that requires a long, thoughtful,
time-consuming answer.
Come on, Claire.
[grunts]
Where are you, Jim?
-[growling]
-[gasps]
[growls]
And, finally, my friends and I returned
back to the present. [chuckles]
-My, what a journey, eh, Nari?
-[sniffles]
[sneezes, gasps]
-[giggles]
-Nari, are you unwell?
Uh, no, no, no, no, no.
Nari's just a bit jet-lagged is all!
It's a human phrase
for, you know, traveling in jets
and lagging a little.
Pull it together, Nari.
Jeez, what's taking her so long?
I would have gotten Lake out by now!
Come on, let's go!
-We're getting you out of here.
-[growls]
[Claire grunts]
[sighs]
Easy. Easy.
This isn't you.
-You're James Lake, Jr., the Trollhunter.
-[growls]
Jim is gone.
The Knight freed me. [roars]
Nari's fine. Simple explanation.
-Right, Nari?
-Oh, right.
[coughs, gags]
I guess the "me" is out of the bag.
[chuckles]
Oh, fuzz buckets.
-You dare deceive us?
-[grunts]
Well, in all fairness,
I wasn't expecting a rogue hairball.
Where is Nari? The real one!
Eh, you're not the only one with magic.
I am the Defying Duke Domzalski!
-[laughs] Are you a god?
-[Toby humming]
Yes. Yes, I am.
-Don't tell anyone.
-[Aaarrrggh and Blinky groan]
This castle shall be your tomb!
Your ruse has failed!
We must go now, to protect Nari!
We're not leaving without Claire and Jim!
Yes, we are! [grunts]
-[Douxie grunts]
-Oh, dang! [whimpers]
Do I dive in to save the day,
or do I go back to the ship?
Can I fly it?
Will Wizard-Dad get mad if I do?
Ah, dang! Palchuk Charge!
-[yelling]
-[sighs]
Annoying mortal.
[screams, grunts]
[Steve grunting, screams]
-[chuckles]
-Please.
You said we'd always find
a way to save each other.
I love you.
We belong together.
[growls] I belong
here!
-Jim! Come on!
-[growls]
You're not making this easy!
We'll help you.
-[Claire grunts]
-[Morgana] The boy is gone, little lamb.
[Claire] Morgana?
You just won't die, will you?
The Order had other plans.
There's no way out, I'm afraid,
for any of us. [grunts]
[Claire grunts]
[Morgana grunts]
[roars]
I won't give up on you, Jim.
I'll find a way.
Foolish servant!
You think you can stop us?
We planned for a millennium--
gathering, waiting
[screaming]
-[squeaks]
-[Skrael cackles]
Do you mind?
Sorry, it's just so fun.
to undo you, to undo all!
Magna Tawna Truess! [grunts]
-[Douxie grunts]
-[Green Knight growls]
Your magicks are nothing! [grunts]
[grunts]
[grunts] Stay away from him!
[Green Knight] You don't recognize me,
old friend?
[gasps]
Arthur! My king
How? Why?
[Arthur] After I fell in battle,
there was darkness.
But they made me anew.
No!
-It cannot be!
-[growling]
-[gasps]
-[roars]
[Douxie grunts]
-[grunts]
-[Steve screams, grunts]
We propose new terms.
Give us Nari, or he dies.
-[Archie yowls]
-[grunts]
Hisirdoux!
I'm sorry! This is my fault!
I know not what darkness twists you,
but you will not harm the boy!
Not while I draw breath!
[grunts]
[Merlin grunts]
-[gasps, screams]
-No!
[groans] My friend
what have you become?
Our redemption.
It's over.
[inhales]
-[Arthur grunts]
-[glass shatters]
No! [echoes]
[both grunt]
[rumbling]
-Get out of here!
-[Archie yowls, grunts]
[crickets chirping]
-Hang on. Hang on, Master.
-[groans]
Hang on!
[Claire grunts]
-Oh, no!
-Douxie!
He looks bad.
Hold still. I can fix this!
[hesitates] I can fix this!
-I can--
-[Merlin] Stop, Hisirdoux.
No one can.
Do not blame yourself.
I'm sorry. I should have listened to--
No, no.
I'm sorry.
I spent a lifetime
serving the wrong master,
trying to save this world.
You can't!
You're Merlin,
the greatest wizard of all time!
[sobs]
I saw a glimmer of greatness
of what you could become.
And the greatest thing
I have ever accomplished was saving you.
[exhales] I'll try and make you proud.
You already have
son.
[exhales]
No.
No, you can't go!
No, please. I'm not ready.
Huh?
Douxie, I'm so sorry.
I-- I can't believe he's gone.
What is that?
It's all we have left to guide us.
Other than that
we're on our own.
[theme music playing]