Big Day s01e09 Episode Script

YOU'RE ALMOST AS WHACKED AS OUR DAUGHTER.
WAIT! WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
MY-MY CONTACT LENSES! I DRANK YOUR CONTACTS? I AM LEGALLY BLIND WITHOUT MY GLASSES! OH! Big Day 109 YOU WANTED TO SEE ME? YES, YES.
SIT DOWN.
OKAY.
COMFORTABLE? FOR ME.
GOOD.
GOOD.
NOW, LORNA, I'M GOING TO ASK YOU A QUESTN, AND IT'S A VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION, SO I NEED YOUR HONEST ANSWER.
OKAY.
HOW MUCH IS THIS WEDDING COSTING ME? UH, WELL, IT'S- THE REAL BUDGET, NOT THE SHAM ONE JANE SHOWED ME.
OH, NO.
NO! FRANCIS, HE KNOWS.
HELLO, SINGLE-LADY-NOT-FOR-LONG.
HI, REVEREND.
PAUL, ON TIME TO THE SECOND.
YOU KNOW WHA A TURN-ON THAT IS FOR ME.
OH, IF I WEREN' HAPPILY MARRIED, JANE SKOBO, LISTEN, I NEED YR HELP.
ALICE TOTALLY SCREWED ME BY GETTING ME A GIFT.
DID YOU KNOW THAT THE BRIDE AND GROOM EXCHANGE GIFTS ON THE WEDDING DAY? ENOUGH WITH THE GIFTS.
? IS THAT ALL YOU PEOPLE DO AROUND HERE? NO ONE'S EXPECTING ANOTHER GIFT FROM YOU.
THEN GET HER SOMETHING NICE, YOU GUYS GOTTA HIDE ME FROM THE REVEREND.
OH, GOD.
YOU DIDN'T SLEEP WITH THE MINISTER, DID YOU? IT'S A FAIR QUESTION, BECCA.
NO! I WEN TO THIS YOUTH GROUP THING, AND HE GOT ALL BENT OUT OF SHAPE 'CAUSE I WAS SELLING CIGARETTES TO THE CHOIRBOYS.
WHAT WAS I SUPPOD TO DO? GIVE 'EM AWAY? LISTEN, ALICE AND I HAVE TO GO AND HAVE THIS SIT-DOWN WITH THE MINISTER, SO CAN YOU TWO GO OUT- YES! YES! YOU NEED ICE? 'CAUSE YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH ICE AT A WEDDING.
BECCA, YOU'RE IN CHARGE NOW.
ALL RIGHT, I NEED YOU TO GET ME A STUFFED BEAR.
EXCUSE ME, A BEAR? YEAH, WE HAVE A THING, AND, UH, SHE'S GONNA LOVE IT.
TRUST ME.
MY-MY PET NAME FOR HER IS "HONEY BEAR.
" SHE'S HONEY BEAR, AND I'M SUGAR BEAR, OKAY? NO.
IT IS NOT OKAY.
MAN, I HAVE A KNOT IN MY STOMACH LIKE YOU JUST TOLD ME YOUR SISTER WAS REALLY YOUR MOTHER.
CAN YOU JUST PLEASE GO AND GET THE BEAR? IT WOULD GET ME OUT OF THE HOUSE.
SHOULD WE HELP HIM, SNICKERDOODLE? SURE THING, UH SUGAR BOOBS.
I'M-I'M NOT GOOD AT THIS.
OH, DANNY! DANNY! HEY, YOU GOT A SECOND? UH, ACTUALLY, DAD, NO.
I GOTTA GO INTO THIS MEETING.
BUT-BUT I JUST HAVE SOMETHING TO GIVE YA.
OH, CRAP! IS THERE A PARENT GIFT, TOO? BECAUSE I-I DIDN'T GET YOU ANYTHING EITHER.
NO, DANNY, I-I JUS WANT TO ASK YOU SOMETHING.
DANNY SON MIRACLE GETTING A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE, DAD.
LOOK, I'VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND SOME WAY TO CONTRIBUTE TO THIS WEDDING.
IS THA YOUR OLD WEDDING BAND? IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO ME? I- I THOUGHT YOU BURIED THIS WHEN MOM LEFT YOU FOR CAROL.
I FOUND IT WHEN I WAS DIGGING THE NEW SWEAT LODGE.
ANOTHER SWEAT LODGE? YEAH, HAD TO GIVE THE OLD ONE TO THE RACCOONS.
THEY JUST WEREN' GOING TO LEAVE.
OH.
FEELING BETTER? YES, THANK YOU.
YOU READY TO TELL ME THE WEDDING BUDGET? BUT I'M- I PROMISED YOUR WIFE.
SHE KNOWS WHERE MY FAMILY LIVES.
WRITE DOWN A NUMBER, THEN GET UP AND WALK AWAY.
IF JANE ASKS, YOU NEVER SAID A WORD TO ME.
SURE, STEVE.
I CAN GIVE YOU THE CATERER'S PHONE NUMBER.
JANE! OKAY.
SO THIS SIT-DOWN GIS YOU GUYS ONE LAST CHANCE JUST TO TAKE A BREAK OM THIS HECTIC DAY AND CHECK IN, CONNEC AND QUIETLY REFLECT ON- WHERE'S YOUR MOTHER? I'M GOING TO KILL HER.
UH, DAD, YOU REMEMBER REVEREND PAUL.
OF COURSE.
PARDON ME, REVEREND, I HAVE TO GO KILL MY WIFE.
SORRY.
LIKE YOU SAID, CRAZY DAY.
OKAY.
EARLIER ON THE PHONE, I ASKED YOU GUYS TO DRAW PICTURES OF YOUR FUTURE TOGETHER.
UH, NO ONE- NO ONE EVER DOES THAT.
AH ALL RIGHT, WELL, DID YOU AT LEAS DO THE DECION TREE? YEAH, I-I DON'T THINK WE EVEN OPENED THAT PACKET.
WELL, THEN, HOW DID YOU MAKE ANY DECISIONS? WELL, WE HAVEN'T REALLY HAD ANY PROBLEMS MAKING DECISIONS.
YEAH,YOU KNOW, I JUST DO WHAT SHE WANTS, AND IF SHE GETS STUCK, THEN I JUST DO WHAT HER MOM WANTS.
DANNY, DANNY, YOU CAN' STAND ON THE SIDELINE.
YOU GOTTA GET INVOLVED! I AM-AM INVOLVED.
UH, FOR THE RECORD, I, UH, I ASKED HER MARRY ME ON THE WAY TO THE RING STE.
WHAT I WANT YOU GUYS TO WORK ON IS MAKING DECISIONS TOGEER AS A COUPLE.
OKAY? IF THERE'S ONE THING I WANT YOU GUYS JUST TO TAKE OU OF THIS MEETING, IT'S JUST THAT, YOU KNOW, NO MATTER WHERE YOU GO TODAY- OH! OH! HELLO? WHY-WHY DO I HAVE TO PICK IT UP? WELL, BECAUSE IT'S YOUR PRESCRIPTION.
FINE, FINE.
SORRY.
SO OKAY.
SHE TAKES THE LEAD, MOM FILLS IN, YOU FEEL EMASCULATED.
GO! UH NO, I DON'T.
I JUST FEEL- CHEESE AND CRACKERS! WHAT?! NO, I DIDN'T HANG UP ON YOU.
NO, I DID NOT.
I'M WORKING.
LOOK, I-I-I DON'T CALL YOU WHEN YOU'RE COLLECTING MONEY AT THE AIRPORT.
I'M GONNA NEED A MINUTE.
YEAH, TAKE YOUR TIME.
I MEAN, IF, UH OH.
YEAH, YEAH.
OH, YOU WANT US TO YEAH, YEAH.
WHAT'S THIS? THE CURRENT WEDDING BUDGET, WHICH IS THREE TIMES WHAT WE AGREED, AND THAT'S AFTER WE DOUBLED IT.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO MAKES MONEY, STEVE.
I MAKE MONEY, TOO.
YOUR STORE? YOU CAN' POSSIBLY BE TALKING ABOUT YOUR TCHOTCHKE STORE AS A MEANS OF INCOME.
NIRVANA IS NO A TCHOTCHKE STORE.
WE IMPORT FINE SHAMAN SPIRI CRAFTS FROM AROUND THE WORLD.
I KNOW.
I PAY FOR YOU TO VACATION- OH, EXCUSE ME, "BUY MERCHANDISE" EVERY YEAR.
THEN NOTHING SELLS, YOU WIND UP GIVING IT ALL TO YOUR FRIENDS ASIFTS.
I'M UP TO MY ASS IN TIBETAN PRAYER BELLS.
YOU ARE DELIBERATELY TRYING TO RUIN THIS PERFECT DAY.
NO, I'M NOT.
BUT WE ARE CUTTING THE COS OF THIS WEDDING DRAMASTICALLY.
THAT IS NOT EVEN A WORD! YES, IT IS.
YES, IT IS.
YEAH, I COMBINED "DRAMATICALLY" AND "DRASTICALLY.
" SEE HOW I CAN CONSERVE? YOU KNOW, I'M NOT WORRIED, STEVE, BECAUSE THE COURSE HAS BEEN SET.
CHANGING THIS WEDDING IS LIKE TURNING AROUND THE "TITANIC.
" OH, YOU WANNA SEE ME TURN IT AROUND? I'LL TURN IT AROUND BECAUSE AM A TUGBOAT OF INDIGNATION! I LOVE IT.
SO, UH WE WANT A BEAR.
WELL, YOU ARE IN LUCK.
YOU GET TO CHOOSE THE KIND OF BEAR, THE SIZE OF BEAR, HIS CLOTHES, HIS HAT AND HIS LITTLE SHOES! YEAH, WE WANT A BEAR.
CAN WE BUY THAT ONE? A- BEAR-HAM LINCOLN? OOH, HE'S NOT FOR SALE.
IT WOULD BE UN-BEAR-ABLE TO PART WITH HIM.
DON'T DO THAT.
DON'T DO BEAR PUNS.
SORRY.
DAD.
HEY.
I'VE BEEN THINKING, AND, UM AS MUCH AS I'D LIKE TO, I CAN'T ACCEPT YOUR RING.
OH? YEAH, UM, ALICE DECIDED THA WE SHOULD HAVE MATCHING RINGS.
WELL, IT IS AN EQUAL PARTNERSHIP, DANNY.
YEAH.
YOU KNOW, WHEN YOUR MOTHER AND I GOT MARRIED, WE WERE GIVEN THE MOST WONDERFUL GIFT- A DECISION TREE.
OH, IT GAVE US A LOT OF CLARITY, HELPED US WITH SO MANY DECISIONS UNTIL IT HELPED YOUR MOTHER DECIDE THAT SHE LIKED WOMEN.
WELL, THERE'S GOTTA BE SOMETHING I CAN DO FOR YOU GUYS.
OH, NO WORRIES.
OH OH, YES! I COULD SET UP MY CARICATURE BOOTH.
I MEAN, THEY'LL ALL LOOK BOB HOPE, BUT EVERYONE WILL HAVE A VERY NICE KEEPSAKE.
YEAH, UM YOU KNOW, THEY'RE ALL GONNA BE GETTING THESE PERSONALIZED CRYSTAL SWANS, SO WE'RE SORT OF SET WITH MEMENTOS.
I GET A SWAN? OH! WOW.
ALL RIGHT.
THE BAR HAS BEEN RAISED.
I GOTTA THINK OF SOMETHING GOOD MAN, I REALLY NEED MY SWEAT LODGE.
IS YOUR SHOWER FREE? SO LOSING THE HEAT LAMPS.
YES.
OH, AND THOSE BUTTER TONGS.
BUTTER TONGS.
OKAY, WE'RE CHIPPING AWAY HERE, LORNA.
CHIPPING AWAY.
WHAT ARE THESE FOR? THOSE ARE THE PETALS FOR THE FLOWER GIRL TO USE DOWN THE AISLE.
ALL RIGHT, HOW MUCH IS IT COSTING ME TO HAVE MY IDIOT NIECE THROW THESE ON THE GROUND LIKE TRASH? $40 A DOZEN BUT WE'RE SAVING MONEY ON THE BASKE BECAUSE WE'RE RENTING I FROM JANE'S STORE.
I'M PAYING FOR IT TWICE? HOW DARE YOU CANCEL THE ROLLS-ROYCE? OH, OH, YOU HEARD YES, YES, YOU ALMOS SNUCK THAT PAST ME, BUT I'M NOT PAYING TO HAVE ALICE AND DANNY RIDEDE AROUND THE BLOCK IN A VINTAGE ROLLS-ROYCE WHILE EVERYONE ELSE COMES INTO THE TENT FOR COCKTAILS.
IT IS THE SIGNATURE MOMEN OF THE WEDDING.
THE GUESTS AREN' EVEN GOING TO SEE IT.
ARE THEY, LORNA? OH- IT'S NOT FOR THE GUESTS! THIS IS OUR ONLY SHO AT GETTING THIS WEDDING IN A MAGAZINE.
TELL H, LORNA.
UH, WELL, IT'S OUR ONLY- FORGET IT.
IT'S NO HAPPENING.
RIGHT, LORNA? UH, BUT, WELL- LORNA! YOU KNOW, YOU BOTH MAKE, UM, GOOD AAH! "YOU HAVE VALUE.
YOU HAVE WORTH.
" GREAT.
NOW YOU'VE BROKEN LORNA.
WELL, STEVE, I HOPE YOU'VE ENJOYED YOUR LITTLE VICTORY, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOW DESTROYED THIS WEDDING.
THANK YOU.
OH, UH, I'VE ALSO ELIMINATED THE HEAT LAMPS.
WHAT, YOU WAN THE GUESTS TO FREEZE? WE'VE GOT CLOSETS FULL OF SWEATERS AND BLANKETS.
BLANKETS? LORNA, WOULD YOU INSTRUC THE CATERER TO HAVE THE GUESTS FORM A LINE TO GET THEIR FOOD, AND, OH, I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST SERVE IT IN TIN CANS OUT OF GIANT STEEL POTS, BECAUSE OUWEDDING THEME HAS JUST GONE FROM "MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM" TO "SKID ROW SOUP KITCHEN"! OKAY BUT IT'LL COST MORE MONEY.
TIN IS HARD TO FIND.
SO WHERE WERE WE? YOU KNOW, I DON'T SEE THE POINT IN TRYING TO MAKE A JOINT DECISION ABOUT OUR WEDDING WHEN ALL THE DECISIONS HAVE BEEN MADE.
WELL, I THINK IF WE JUST TRY, ALICE BUT WHAT ARE WE DECIDING? SEE, THIS IS WHY YOU GUYS NEED TO TAKE THIS TIME.
YOU CAN'T EVEN DECIDE ON MAKING A DECISION.
CHIPS AND PICKLES.
WELL, HERE'S A BI OF MARITAL ADVICE.
DON'T GIVE YOUR WIFE YOUR CELL PHONE NUMBER.
WHAT? I DON'T KNOW WHAT COLOR HIS HAIR SHOULD BE.
I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW BEARS HAHAIR.
IF I'M A BEAR, I WAN MY HAIR TO MATCH MY FUR.
CAN YOU BELIEVE PEOPLE ACTUALLY GIVE EACH OTHER THINGS LIKE THIS? NO.
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND FLOWERS AND CANDY.
I MEAN, FLOWERS JUST DIE, AND CANDY MAKES THEM FAT, AND YOU END UP DUMPING THEM ANYWAY.
MAYBE THE BEAR JUST GIVES 'EM SOMETHING TO HOLD ONTO WHILE THEY CRY THEMSELVES TO SLEEP.
WHY CRY WHEN YOU CAN STEAL THEIR IDENTITY AND DRN THEIR BANK ACCOUNTS? OH, DON'T WORRY.
I COULDN' FIGURE OUT YOUR PASSWORD.
OH.
HOW ARE WE DOING? GREAT! WHEN CAN WE SEW UP ITS ASS AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE? WHOA, SLOW DOWN, BEAR-IO ANDRETTI.
WE DON'T NEED ALL THESE FIRE EXTINGUISHERS.
CAN I HELP YOU? YEAH.
WHERE CAN I GET SOME WATER FOR PHIL? PHIL? WHO'S PHIL? ME HORSE.
I'M YO CARRIAGE DRIVER.
NAME'S 'ENRY.
CARRIAGE DRIVER? WHAT CARRIAGE DRIVER? WELL, THIS BIRD NE HOPKINS SAID SOMETHING ABOU DRIVING A BRIDE AND GROOM AROUND THE BLOCK AFTER THE CEREMONY.
OH, SHE DID, DID SHE? WOULDN'T LIE TO YOU, SIR.
OH, NOW I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND- I TIED ME HORSE TO YOUR MAILBOX.
AND, LOOK, IS IT OKAY IF I JUST DROP THE ACCEN UNTIL SHOWTIME? IT WEARS THIN PRETTY QUICK.
DAMN IT! ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
DON'T GET YOUR KNICKERS IN A KNOT, GUV'NER.
THOSE WERE JUST E-MAILS.
WE NEVER MET IN PERSON.
ONLINE AFFAIR? CHURCH CHAT ROOM.
I FIGURED IT OUT! OH, HEY, DAD.
IT'S THE MOS PERFECT EXPRESSION OF YOUR LOVE FOR EACH OTHER- "ARTHUR'S THEME.
" WHAT'S THAT? WHEN YOU GET CAUGHT BETWEEN THE MOON AND NEW YORK CITY I KNOW IT'S CRAZY BUT IT'S TRUE AND WHEN YOU GET CAUGHT BETWEEN THE MOON AND NEW YORK CITY THE BEST THAT YOU CAN DO THE BEST THAT YOU CAN DO IS FALL IN LOVE OH, THAT'S SO SWEET.
THANKS, GARF.
YOU LIKE IT? YEAH, IT'S A NICE GIFT.
WHAT'S THE GIFT? I AM GOING TO BE PERFORMING "ARTHUR'S THEME" DURING THE CEREMONY.
DURING THE WHAT? "ARTHUR'S THEME"? WHEN YOU GET CAUGHT BETWEEN THE MOON AND NEW YORK CITY I KNOW IT'S CRAZY, BUT IT'S TRUE WHEN YOU GET CAUGHT BETWEEN THE MOON AND NEW YORK CITY THE BES THAT YOU CAN DO THE BES THAT YOU CAN DO THE BEST THAT YOU CAN DO IS FALL IN LOVE THAT'S AMAZING.
UNFORTUNATELY, WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR A SONG.
OH, YEAH.
CHIPS AND PICKLES.
UM, BUT AT ABOUT THE - NO.
ANYONE GETTING MARRIED, COME ON DOWN.
I WAS THINKING- MAYBE YOU COULD BOTH DECIDE ON A POEM FOR YOUR WEDDING.
NOW I HAVE A BOOK HERE SOMEWHE THAT, UH UM, YOU KNOW, I'M SORRY.
I KNOW THIS IS NONE OF OUR BUSINESS, BUT IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGH BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR WIFE? OF COURSE.
WHY DO-WHY DO YOU ASK? WELL, YOU SMASHED YOUR PHONE.
OH! NO,I, UH, I DROPPED IT.
BUT LIKE I WAS SAYING, DECIDE, UM, ON A POEM THAT'S GONNA REFLEC THE JOURNEY THA YOU'RE TAKG TOGETHER.
A JOURNEY THAT IS- I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY.
IT'S JUST, UH MY WIFE JUST LEFT ME, AND, UH, SHE'S FILING FOR DIVORCE.
BUT HEY, I'M A PRO, AND I AM NOT GONNA LET MY PROBLEMS GET IN THE WAY OF YOUR BIG DAY.
ARE YOU SURE? ABSOLUTELY.
YEAH.
NOW, ALICE, DANNY I KNOW YOU'RE READY.
I KNOW YOUR HEARTS ARE FULL.
SO LET'S GET ON WITH THIS SICK LITTLE JOKE.
WHY D I THINK THAT I WAS ANY DIFFEREN THAN ALL THE COUPLES I MARRY? NONE OF THEM ARE RIGHT FOR EACH OTHER.
HE'S NOT TALKING ABOUT US.
EXCUSE ME.
I GOTTA CALL MY ATTORNEY.
UM, I DON'T THINK THIS IS WORKING.
HEY.
YEAH, IT'S ME.
WHAT? WELL, WHAT DO YOU MEAN, SHE PUT YOU ON RETAINER? HOW COULD- YOU'RE MY BROTHER! I MEAN, WHAT IF HE BREAKS DOWN DURING THE CEREMONY? YOU KNOW WHAT? BURN IN HELL! AND I CAN MAKE THAT HAPPEN! SHOULD WE? UH, I THINK WE HAVE TO.
YEAH, REVEREND PAUL? WHAT?! UH, I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY.
I- I DON'T THINK THIS IS REALLY WORKING OUT.
YEAH, WE'RGONNA HAVE TO LET YOU GO.
Y- Y-YOU'RE FIRING ME ON THE DAY THAT MY WIFE DUMPS ME? YEAH.
BOY, THAT FELT REALLY GOOD.
YEAH, THAT WAS THE FIRST WEDDING DECISION WE MADE TOGETHER.
THANK YOU, REVEREND.
YEAH, I MEAN, YOU HELPED US MORE THAN ANY "DECISION TREE" EVER COULD HAVE.
OH, W-WAIT, WAIT.
SO-SO-SO YOU'RE NOT FIRING ME? OH, NO, NO.
WE'RE FIRING YOU TOGETHER.
THIS IS THE WORST BIRTHDAY EVER.
A HORSE-DRAWN CARRIAGE? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR ND? AND HOW ELSE ARE ALICE AND DANNY TO GET AROUND THE BLOCK? CAN WE CLEAR THIS ROOM, PLEASE? YOU BLATANTLY DISREGARDED MY DIRECTIVE TO CUT THA FROM THE WEDDING.
DIRECTIVE? DON'T YOU TALK TO ME LIKE I'M ONE OF YOUR NURSES.
IF YOU WERE ONE OF MY NURSES, I'D HAVE YOU ARRESTED FOR EMBEZZLEMENT.
OH, NO, YOU WOULDN'T, BECAUSE YOU'RE TOO CHEAP TO DIAL 9-1-1.
YOU JUST KISSED YOUR SAFARI GOOD-BYE.
YOU WOULDN'T DARE.
OH, WOULDN'T I? BESIDES, IF YOU WAN TO SEE WILD ANIMALS, THERE'S ONE NAMED PHIL TIED TO OUR MAILBOX.
FINE! FINE! THEN MAYBE THAT $10,000 RANGE WITH THE GRIDDLE AND GRILL.
YOU NEITHER GRIDDLE NOR GRILL.
OH, WELL, THEN I GUESS IT'LL JUST BE A BIG WASTE OF MONEY, WON'T IT? OR I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE I'LL JUS GRILL $100 BILLS.
DAMN IT.
WHY CAN'T YOU BEHA? BECAUSE I'M OUT OF CONTROL, STEVE! OH, I LOVE I WHEN YOU SPEND MY MONEY! OH, AND I LOVE I WHEN YOU TRY TO STOP ME! UPSTAIRS! NO, THERE'S NOT ENOUGH TIME.
LAUNDRY ROOM.
QUICK.
WHEN DID WE GE A NEW WASH AND DRYER? WHAT ARE YOU DOING, DAD? REBURYING MY WEDDING RING.
I NEVER SHOULD HAVE UNEARTHED I FROM ITS CURSED GRAVE.
OH, SORRY.
WERE YOU BURYING SOMETHING HERE? UH NO.
NO.
AH, LISTEN.
ALICE AND I HAD TO FIRE THE MINISTER.
HMM.
BUT ALICE HAD A GREAT IDEA.
WE'D BE HONORED IF YOU'D OFFICIATE OUR CEREMONY.
ME? WELL, YOU WANTED TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE WEDDING.
OH! OH! OH, IT'S SUCH AN HONOR.
OH, THANK YOU.
AND I HAVE SO MANY GREAT IDEAS.
BUT WHERE AM I GONNA GE A GO IN THREE HOURS? OH, I KNOW.
WAIT, UH, DAD-DAD-DAD! WE'LL TE YOU WHA WE WANT YOU TO DO.
RIGHT.
A GROOM BEAR-THIS IS GREAT! I GOTTA TELL YOU GUYS, I DIDN'T THINK YOU HAD IT IN YOU.
IT WAS LIKE PASSING A STONE, DANNY- A FURRY, FURRY STONE.
GO AHEAD.
HUG IT.
I LOVE YOU FOREVER, MY SUGAR BEAR.
IS THIS A JOKE? I'M SUGAR BEAR.
ALICE IS HONEY BEAR.
ACCORDING TO THIS, I LOVE MYSELF.
THANKS A L.
I DON'T KNOW IF THE KIDS TOLD YOU, BUT I WILL BE OFFICIATING THE WEDDING.
REALLY? YEAH.
WHICH MEANS WE WILL BE WORKING TOGETHER PRETTY CLOSELY.
DOES IT NOW? I LOVE YOU FOREVER, MY SUGAR BEAR.
SHUT UP.
WHATERE YOU TWO DOING IN THERE? OH, YOUR FATHER AND I WERE WORKING OUT OUR MONEY ISSUES.
GOD.
I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU TWO STAY MARRIED.