Eli Stone s01e09 Episode Script
I Want Your Sex
Previously on "Eli Stone" You know I've been seeing things lately.
Uh, when do you take it out? Given the location of the aneurysm, surgery is a bad idea.
- who's that? - Beth Keller-- the Beth that was your first at bat? I feel awful.
And you broke up with me.
You wanna grab a drink? So Stone's out and Dowd's in.
- You're firing me? - I can't.
What I'm not obligatedo do is provide you with an office or an assistant.
It's been my aneurysm the whole damn time, and I'm gonna get this thing out of my head! That surgery could kill you! I won't have anything left to live for anyway.
There's gotta be a less humiliating outfit-- something that closes in the back, at least.
I overheard one of the nurses saying she thought your butt was cute.
Come on.
Don't be nervous.
All we're doing is talking about surgery on my brain what's there to be nervous about? - Blindness.
- Coma.
Long-term memory loss.
Sure, I can remove it.
It's no biggie.
- You've found your man.
- Really? - That's fantastic.
- Told you.
Just out of curiosity, how attached are you to your ability to speak? so I'd be a vegetable.
I wouldn't use the word "vegetable.
" Well, I was combining blindness, paralysis and permanent brain damage into one easy-to-remember category.
didn't you mention some hospital in china? Tin-tin puma? Tiantan Puhua.
And the news won't sound any better in Mandarin.
Look, Eli, are you sure this is something you really want? If the something is ending up a drooling idiot, then no.
But if it means getting the brain defect removed from my head that's making my life a living hell, then yes.
Well, the good news is you're already a drooling idiot, so the only thing left to do is pick a surgeon for the other thing.
Out of those guys? They didn't seem like they could remove a cap from a pen.
They're the best neurosurgeons I could get you in with.
Well, now let's try the ones that you couldn't get me in with.
All right, there's one-- Sanjay Rajapaksa, but he doesn't take walk-ins.
He only handles cases originating from his own hospital.
Or he did, until you applied your copious powers of persuasion.
All right, all right, I'll make a call.
You're the best.
Thank you.
Mm, don't thank me.
I just don't want to spend the rest of my life wiping drool off your chin.
Beth? Eli! What are you doing at the hospital? I, um I'm sorry.
I just didn't expect to see you.
Ben.
I'm bringing ben to the doctor.
You know he's not with you, right? Yes, he's at the psychologist.
They work one-on-one for an hour, individual counseling.
So how are you? I saw you on the news.
I was gonna call, but I figured, you know, you have enough on your plate.
Yeah, I've been better.
I, uh I got demoted.
I lost my office.
I had a fight with my acupuncturist/spiritual guide.
I alienated the one person at work who mistakenly admired me and made a serious ethical breach which helped get several hundred people kicked out of their homes and I-I broke up with Taylor.
That's oh, Eli.
If you ever need to talk, you still have my number, right? Yeah.
- I might just give you a call.
- okay.
Bye.
You'll never guess who I ran into.
Come on, Patti, guess.
You're not Patti.
No, um, I'm Bradley Kitsis.
I'm your temp.
Where's Patti? She's not here.
I noticed.
I can see, Bradley, at least for now.
Oh, she left me this note to read to you.
- Uh, "Eli, I'm taking a personal week" - Personal week? "To look after my friends and relatives" in Silver Terrace who, thanks to you, now have no homes.
" "No homes" is in capital letters, which is why I thanks, Brad.
I got it.
Our billables are up by 10% this quarter-- an increase almost entirely due to our success in the solinsky case.
I can't help but swell with fatherly pride.
I had a lot of help.
Perhaps you'd willing to apply your deft touch to judge Doyle.
This being Doyle "the il.
" Good luck.
Judge Doyle has just retained W.
P.
K.
in connection with a personal medical crisis.
Is he finally getting the pole removed from his rectum? I hear that can be a painful procedure.
Not nearly as painful as leukemia, mr.
Dowd.
Judge Doyle needs a bone marrow transplant to treat his cancer, but his only donor match backed out of the donation agreement yesterday.
And now that we've established your sensitivity to the judge's plight, you can assist Taylor.
Sir, Doyle the-- uh, judge Doyle hates me.
I'm sure you're familiar withmy "I could care less" face.
Moving on to other outstanding business * I can't light * * no more of your darkness * * all my pictures * * seem to fade to black and white * * it's much too late * * to save myself from falling * * closed the door * * and left me blinded by the light * ladies and gentlemen-- mr.
George Michael! Oh, no.
It's not.
Oh, no, it's not what? Are you Eli Stone? I'm George Michael.
would--would you mind not poking me, please? Well, I'm sorry, it's just, you know, you're very solid for a vision.
And you're a very odd man.
Well, at least I'm not a hallucination.
Well, he can see me.
Adley, do you see me talking to anyone? Real life? Actual person? Of course I do, sir.
That's Bone.
Yeah, it happens all the time.
I had the glasses first, by the way.
Mind you, Bone and I do have something in common in that we are both perfectly visible.
I'm sorry.
I think I've been wasting your time, mr.
Stone.
No, no, no.
Please, please, please, uh, stay.
I I'm sorry.
I just don't-- I don't typically get visits like this one.
what can I do for you, mr.
Michael? Call me George.
Um, well, I want you to take a case for me.
I found this in the "times.
" It's about a young girl who was thrown out of her high school for playing one of my songs at a school "abstinence" assembly.
Of course.
This was all over the news.
What was the song again? Uh, "I want your sex.
" Sorry, you're not my type.
It was a joke.
Anyway, uh, I want to hire you to help her get back in.
Now obviously I'll cover all the legal fees, mr.
Stone.
Call me Eli, and this is very generous of you.
Obviously, I wouldn't, uh I couldn't say no to you.
So if you don't mind me asking Why me? Why did you come to me? Well, you might think I'm the odd one now.
But the other night I had a dream, and, um, in the dream, I was completely lost, uh, when someone told me I needed to find a lawyer named Eli Stone.
Mr.
Wethersby? You were looking for me, sir? That would be inconsistent with the termination of our relationship, now wouldn't it? I ju heard that you wanted to see me, sir.
Maybe Bradley meant mr.
Posner.
No, he meant me.
I just didn't want you inferring that I actually craved this conversation.
Nevertheless, I understand that you've been retained by--who was it again? George Michael, the pop superstar? Yes, sir, unless there's a problem with that.
There is, actually-- two problems, in fact.
For one thing, you're still on probation.
Secondly, section 6.
3 paragraph "j" of the partnership agreement obligates a partner to oversee any case where the client has a high public profile.
Well, I guess it's good then that George isn't technically the client.
Her name is Molly Foster.
Shs 17 and much less famous, sir.
I don't have all day to waste on semantics.
If someone of mr.
Michael's esteem is involved in this case, then obviously the requirement to oversee applies.
Including appearing in court? And managing client relations, yes.
Okay, then.
Welcome to the case.
I'm sure mr.
Michael will appreciate having a senior partner on his team.
- As will Molly, sir.
- Who? Our client, Molly Foster.
Right.
Right.
I didn't expect this from Jordan Wethersby.
I ask him to send me his best lawyers.
He sends me a girl.
Well, let me introduce you to mr.
Wethersby's daughter, sir.
I wasn't talking about her, Dowd.
Good to see you, Taylor.
So let's get to it.
So you're worried about the, uh, lack of legal precedent? No, I'm worried about the lack of precedent in our favor.
Well, that's why I pay the 2 of you $550 an hour.
I know this is a long shot, but I have no choice.
I'm dying.
leukemia proessed to stageour.
Nowhere to go but down.
Did you tell the would-be donor? No, mr.
Dowd.
I wa him to think I need the painful extractions of his bone marrow for my personal collection.
Usually only family members are an exact match.
The would-be donor is a relative, isn't he? My son.
And he knows you're dying, and he still won't help you? We aren't exactly close.
He was 2 when his mother and I divorced, and I haven't seen Scott since then.
So the settlement conference we're scheduled to have in an hour is the first time you're seeg your son in 19 years? Okay! I'll have all the sharp objects removed from the conference room.
this is a critical meeting, obviously.
It's important that you let me do the talking, get us off on the right foot with Mary.
- Molly, sir.
- Understandably, she'll be reluctant to dive - into the legal waters, but-- Eli! George, hello again.
I'm sorry.
I'm not too late, am I? You're just off to see Molly? - Exactly.
No, you're just in time.
- Cool.
This is the firm's senior partner, Jordan Wethersby.
He's gonna be getting us off on the right foot.
Good to meet you, mr.
Wethersby.
Yes, it's, um - an honor, mr.
Michael.
- Yeah.
Call me George.
George.
It's good to see you again.
You make it sound like we just saw each other last week.
Why don't we all sit down? have you had a chance to review our proposal? Yes.
Scot this isn't I don't care about the money.
Well, unless I'm mistaken, judge Doyle already prevailed upon your more noble instincts.
I took the test.
Doctors started to describe the procedure to me, and I guess I had second thoughts, okay? I'm sorry.
I mean, it's not like I even know you or anything.
I know.
I know, and I'm sorry.
I truly aM.
But I'm asking for your help here.
And believe me when I tell ya, that's not something that comes easy for me.
I went through this phase where I'd send you things-- letters, report cards.
What did you ever do with those things anyway? I thought I thought I shouldn't promise a relationship I couldn't deliver on.
Yeah.
Yeah, well, I guess I can't deliver now.
Sorry.
I don't think we'll be settling.
you are a dead ringer.
It's amazing.
Mom, you have to see this George Michael impersonator Chloe hired! It's hilarious.
Hi, Molly.
It's great to meet you.
I've read about your expulsion from school, and I've hired these attorneys to help you get back in.
Shut up.
no way.
Please come in.
oh, can I get you gentlemen anything? Coffee? Maybe something british-- some crumpets or a pint of bitters? no, thank you.
That's fine.
sir, you're unusually quiet.
Are you feeling okay? I feel fine.
Don't ever touch me again.
- so you totally read about me? - Yep.
That is so cooL.
Why don't you tell us exactly what happened at school? There was this, um, lame-ass assembly-- the "abstinence only" assembly? Twice a semester, some expert in never, ever having sex tells us all about it.
After two years of this, um, bull, I decided to take a stand.
I snuck into the principal's office d played "I want your sex" er the P.
A.
The challenge here will be circumventing the supreme court's decision in morse vs.
Frederick, which limits the right to free speech on school grounds.
So you're saying I could lose? Always a possibility in litigation, ms.
Foster, but you gotta have "faith.
" Another one of your songs, I think.
Oh, that's right, yeah.
excuse me.
Hey, it's me.
I just got off the phone with Rajapaksa.
You remember? Super neurosurgeon? Well, uh, it took a lot of begging and a new set of golf clubs, but he's agreed to see you.
Obviously, it's a risk either way you slice it.
Actually, there won't be any slicing involved.
We burn it out of you.
That's just what I always wanted.
So you guys will talk and let me know? Yeah, we'll call you later.
Thank you so much, dr.
Rajapaksa.
Anytime.
awesome.
okay, there is an O.
R.
Free week after next with your name on it.
You sure that's the guy? Well, he's competent, confident, expert in the latest techniques.
Eli, if he were any more qualified, he'd be a fictionatv character.
I'm not asking for a description of him.
I'm asking if you think that's the guy.
I can't make that choice for you, Eli.
I it's too big.
I you're the only one who can do that.
You want this thing out or not I want it out.
I just--I'm not sure that this is the right time.
I'm having a strange week.
Well, coming from you, that's saying something.
George Michael showed up at my office-- for real this time-- don't joke--the same day I happened to bump into Beth, and she has kind of a connection with him.
Beth? BethKeller? Yeah.
Her son sees a doctor at this hospital.
I was thinking of giving her a call.
A-a call like-- - like a date, yes.
- Yeah.
why not? I'm newly single, about to be aneurysm-free.
Well, yeah, but but what? Nothing.
I just, you know, be careful, all right? I know I'm not the reason my parents split up and my father left, but when you're a kid, that's howt feels, you know, like it's your fault.
But now you have a chance at-- at reconciling with your father.
If I give him my bone marrow.
What kind of relationship do we stand to have with those kinds of strings attached? I'm curious.
How do you even know whether you're a compatible donor? I got tested.
Three months ago, he called me up.
No "how are you?" No "sorry I wrote you off.
" Just, "I've got canc.
Would you get your blood tested?" I take it the test determined that you are indeed a compatible donor? Yes, I'm a match.
Hoping the family similarities end there.
Why go through the steps of having yourself tested if you're not prepared to go through with the donation? Is it because maybe you have an obligation to your father, however estranged he may be? I got tested because I wanted to see if I was a match.
I wanted to see if I could save your life so I could tell you to go choke on it.
my reasons were just.
I knew I'd get in trouble.
I just didn't think I'd be expelled.
Did you not know that school policy gives the principal discretion to expel anyone whose--whose behavior "materially interferes with the learning of other students or disrupts the overall education process"? Yes, but that assumes what was happening at the assembly was learning.
The abstinence-only lady tells us condoms don't work, that girls who have abortions are more prone to suicide.
And because of all of those misconceptions, students in abstinence-only programs are less likely to use contraception.
Objection.
Are we to accept miss Foster as an expert witness? The plaintiff's knowledge-- or, I submit, lack thereof-- goes to the merits-- or lack thereof-- of the very pedagogy miss Foster's protest was taking issue with.
Miss Foster, please limit your answers to your direct experiences.
Molly, how has the school's policy affected you? First, my lab partner got pregnant.
Then, um, a friend--I don't want to tell her name, 'cause her mom would totally kill her-- she got gonorrhea in her throat.
I decided I had to do something.
Thank you, Molly.
Very descriptive.
And the "something" you cided to do was to play the song "I want your sex" at a school assembly? That's a very mature form of political protest.
The execution of ms.
Foster's protest isn't at issue here, only whether it's protected under our country's most cherished constitutional principles.
Is that an objection? A strenuous one, your honor.
Sustained.
There was no other course of action? You couldn't have organized a petition? I wanted to expose the hypocrisy.
And when you did, do you think you were being disruptive? I hope so.
Thk you.
No further questions.
That was invigorating.
it reminded me of my salad days-- standing up, p, making a compelling objection right in the middle of my direct examination.
On an issue of real significance-- not just freedom of speech, but the application of that right to our nation's youngest, ones who are truly disenfranchised-- not having the right to vote or something on your mind, mr.
Stone? I was just wondering if it was possible that you were A fanboy of a certain celebrity client.
Mr.
Stone, did you just characterize me, Jordan Wethersby II, senior partner of one of this country's most prestigious firms, a "fanboy"? Of course not, sir, but-- I didn't think so.
And for the record, my musical tastes are none of your concern.
In the name of all that's good and holy, what now? * they say we're young * * and we don't know we won't find out until we grow * * well, I don't know if all that's true 'cause you got me * * and, baby, I got you * * babe * * I got you, babe * * I got you, babe * * I gotyou, babe * "I got you, babe"? I hate that song.
I would never sing it under any circumstances, even hallucinatory ones.
Just like you would never go out with one of our co-workers.
Eli, is there something you want to ask me? No, 'cause I don't listen to my visions anymore, so well, considering last week, A.
K.
A.
bribing a judge, it's probably for the best.
Well, without admitting or denying anything, there won't be any more of that stuff, ause I'm-- I'm having it taken out the aneurysm.
- I thought it was too dangerous.
- Nah.
The ability to swallow's overrated.
Just tell me.
Is there something going on with you and matt? No.
You know, if you hadn't dumped me-- repeatedly, I might add-- I would say you were jealous.
I'm not jealous.
I'm not.
It's just been a rough week, okay? You wouldn't happen to have any time later, would you? I'll tell you all about it.
Look, I get the feeling you're alone right now.
So am I.
But I'm trying to move on.
So I can't be that shoulder for you to cry on.
I'm sorry.
I just--I can't.
That's okay.
Hey, Beth? It's Eli.
yeah, well, I was thinking about what you said the other day about, uh, needing to talk to someone, and, uh, I kinda do.
Principal Ackerman you said that Molly was expelled because her actions were a violation of school policy, correct? students have to learn about consequences.
That's why the school has a strict zero tolerance policy in those circumstances.
Zero tolerance? So you expel every kid who pulls a prank? Wh those pranks are disruptive.
So last fall, when the football team kidnapped the mascot from a rival high school, did you expel the whole team? I didn't deem that prank disruptive to the other students' educations.
What about when members of the senior class superglued the teacher's lounge door shut? Those students were suspended.
But not expelled? It sounds like your zero tolerance policy is more like a six tolerance policy.
- Objection.
- Pass the witness.
Principal Ackerman, why does your school have an abstinence-only program? Because it's the only sex education that the federal government will give us money for.
And if word got out that a student played a sexually explicit song during one of your assemblies-- I'd lose the funding, and the school would have no sex ed program.
Is that right? I don't know.
What I do know is that a girl playing a song that promotes promiscuous sex during a lecture on abstinence risks the program for everyone.
Your honor, the plaintiff would like to call a rebuttal witness-- Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou.
It's the legal name of the artist who wrote the offending song, your honor.
- Mr.
George Michael.
- Fine.
Court will recess until tomorrow.
You're a judge.
The case comes before you.
Do you order one human being to undergo a painful medical procedure to benefit another? Bottom line-- if I were a jurist on this, I could find precedent to support saving my life.
My son can be as angry as he wants at me, but the last time I checked, being a lousy dad didn't carry the death penalty.
You know, I had a dad.
He left my mother when I was 6 for her best friend.
I saw him summers and every other christmas.
I'm sorry.
At what point did mr.
Dowd become a witness? At the point when you let me finish.
My dad died three years ago.
And if I had a chance to save his life, I think the first thing I'd want to know is why I should.
Because regret's a lousy thing to live with.
Well, that's sweet.
They should put that in a poem or something.
We're all here wondering why Scott should feel any regret at all.
You are as much a stranger to him as my father was to me.
More so.
We're family, however estranged we may be.
Nothing changes that.
No, you changed it.
You walked out that door two decades ago, and you never look back.
And so I should die for that? Scott did give you cancer, judge.
- You want him to save you? - Yes.
Tell us.
Tell us why he should.
Because he's my son.
- He has an obligation- - No, he doesn't.
You pissed away any obligation he had to you.
Now tell us why he should help you now.
Because I want to live! I want to live.
The only chance I have of that is him.
Beth? Taylor.
We met at-- oh, your engagement party, of course.
It's so nice to see you.
What are you doing here? Is-- is everything okay?Your son? Oh, he's great, thanks.
No, I'm, um, I'm not here on business.
I'm having dinner.
- With Eli? - Yeah.
That's great.
Old friends catching up.
- Have fun.
- Thanks.
What are you doi? 'Cause I desperately, desperately need a margarita.
And you want me to come with you? Right! Great.
Well, let me just or not.
- no, she didn't.
- yes.
Yes, she did.
Melanie bose totally had the hots for you.
So that's why you were talking to me at that party? You were playing wingwoman for the girl with the headgear? when she found out that we slept togeer, she never talked to me again.
- that's because you were a college whore.
- I kW.
What? I just think--and this is a good week, you know? George Michael's here, my case is interesting, and and I haven't laughed like this in a long time.
Thanks for going out with me tonight.
It's my pleasure.
You know, all that's going on with you, I'm really glad that I can be here.
You don't know how nice it is to hear that.
Lately I've been less popular than melanie bose.
Well, you're just going through a rough time.
But think of all the people that you've helped-- okay, me and ben for two.
Winning that beutel trial totally changed our lives.
I mean, you have to know that.
I do know that.
I just--it just doesn't change the fact that that I'm alone.
I'm so sorry, Eli.
God.
I just broke the rule number one, you know? You don't tell a girl you're on a date with that you're lonely.
- Oh, god - what? - Are you okay? - Uh, yeah.
No.
Nate told me, um, he said that he was gonna tell you today.
Tell me what? - About you guys dating? - Yeah.
Oh, no.
Of course he told me that.
Thank god! oh, my god.
For a second there I thought maybe you didn't know.
Oh, no.
Well, that would be awkward.
to losers.
National order of total losers, San Francisco chapter, in session.
what--don't look at me like that.
You didn't have any plans tonight either, loser.
Believe me, I could have had plans-- plenty of plans with plenty of ladies.
All right, fine.
I'm the only loser, then.
To me.
No, you're not a loser, Taylor.
You're smart.
You're hot.
You're funny you're hot and an excellent drinker.
He's getting it out.
who's getting what out? Eli.
Aneurysm.
Out.
Bye-bye, aneurysm.
Turns out that's not why he dumped me anyway.
What are you talkin' about? I thought he wanted to protect me.
I thought he didn't want me to see him suffer.
Turns out the aneurysm was just an excuse.
Eli dumped me because he just didn't love me enough.
Well, I don't know much about aneurysms, but something's gotta be wrong if he dumped you.
That's sweet.
What you said in court today about ur dad-- now I know why you have to be so damn cocky all the time, why you only date these vapid bimbos.
You're scared that you're gonna be abandoned by someone you actually care about.
Sometimes it's just so hard to be the real me.
she told you.
Have you any idea how humiliating that was for me? - This isn't how I wanted you find out.
- That finally after months of-- of misery and loneliness and--and visions, I finally ask someone out, and I think we're making a connection, only to find out she's already dating my brother.
I-I was gonna tell you yesterday.
Yeah, I could tell from the way you didn't.
We had just come from the doctor.
You have all of these huge, life-altering decisions on your plate.
I didn't want to make things worse.
By telling me you were happy? I was trying to protect you.
Well, I'm a big boy, Nate.
You datingeth wouldn't have even registered if you'd have told me before I'd made an ass out of myself! Okay.
All right.
So you would have said, "hey, th's great.
You know, my life is tanking "worse than the latest ben stiller movie, but I'm so glad you're happy.
" Maybe I would have, yeah.
Who knows? I've been an--an idiot lately.
I pushed Taylor away.
I pushed maggie away, tti, chen.
I just--I just thought that no matter how much of an idiot I was, I wouldn't push my own brother away.
You haven't pushed me away.
You've been dating the girl I lost my virginity to for two months, and you haven't mentioned it.
I said I was sorry.
You call the doctors.
You make all the appointments.
But you don't want to go anywhere near this decision, 'cause you're afraid of how you're gonna feel if it doesn't work-- if I end up paralyzed or worse.
You're a doctor, but you're my big brother, man.
And I need you now more than ever.
But if this is your idea of helping me, thanks but no, thanks.
Eli, wait.
- Just wait! - god! come on, kitty, move.
You're on my jacket! Give him a pet.
Sonny Bone loves to be touched.
Your cat's name is Sonny Bone? That's so weird.
It was between that and "jason bourne.
" You're trying to sneak out of here, aren't you? I'm not sure I've ever been snuck out on before.
No, wait, I have.
I'm not sneaking out.
I'm just leaving quietly.
I've got court.
I know with me.
Please be seated.
It is profoundly disturbing to me that one human being could willfully deny another their last hope for life.
But that doesn't change the very real fact that there is no legal precedent to support judge Doyle's claim.
The plaintiff's suit for breach of contract and specific remedy of performance is hereby denied and judgment granted to the defendant.
Scott? Scott, I know I don't deserve what I'm asking for.
But please don't do anything that you mr.
Michael, tell me, what inspired your song, "I want your sex"? A song, by the way, which rose to number one on the world charts-- a song that helped you win a grammy for best album of the year.
Well, it was inspired by a relationship.
Like most of my work, it was autobiographical.
You heard principal Ackerman describe the song as encouraging promiscuity.
But it's just the opposite.
Ironically enough, I wrote the song about abstinence, and I was very much in love with someone at the time.
So how do you feel about your song being used to protest an abstinence-only sex education program? Well, I applaud it, obviously.
When I wrote it, we were in year six of the A.
I.
D.
S.
crisis, a crisis that Ronald Reagan did not even address publicly until there were over And what the government is doing right now-- funding federal programs that tell children that condoms don't work-- is killing people all over again.
Thank you, mr.
Michael.
These are the lyrics to "I want your sex.
" Would you please read the highlighted portion? "Sex is natural.
Sex is good.
Not everybody does it, but everybody should.
" Do you not think? Do you deny that these lyrics could be understood to promote sexual activity? No, to deny that would be ridiculous.
Nothing further, your honor.
But would ms.
Abrams' interpretation of the lyrics be appropriate in the context of an abstinence-only sex education program? Well, I don't think I can answer that, because an abstinence-only "sex education program" is an oxymoron.
Abstinence can only be a choice if you have all the facts.
I love this country.
I love the fact that you guys have a constitution, that you practice separation of church and state.
But I don't think I'm alone in wondering what's going on with all that right now, and, um, in my opinion, right now America could use a lot more people like Molly.
The whole world could.
The clock is ticking.
Judge Tate's decision is imminent.
My recommendation would be to settle this now.
Get out while you can.
We don't want out.
Judge Tate is not going to insert herself into what is clearly a school matter.
Consider mr.
Michael's testimony.
Judge Tate certainly will.
Not to mention, all the negative media attention has to be getting to you.
Just wait until George does his press conference.
That's a good point, sir.
You know what? This isn't worth it.
Enough is enough.
We'll reinstate Molly, all right? No! I did this to make a point.
I want the school to have a real sex education program.
We've been through this.
There's no way.
I'm sorry, Molly, but the school can't have a sex ed program that doesn't receive federal funding.
Well, actually, I think I know how we can raise that kind of money in one night.
A hero arises.
Lly, how fast can you get a message out? Six seconds.
There are other avenues we can pursue-- other angles, more money.
Everyone has a price.
We could appeal to his mother.
She may see things our way.
No, I I think we all know I'm getting exactly what I deserve.
Judge use what time you have left.
Reach out.
Make contact with your son.
No, I'm I'm done using other people for my benefit.
Then do it for his.
His testimony was proof.
He needs to let go of some of that anger.
Otherwise, he'll end up just like "the boil"? You make a persuasive argument, Taylor.
And thank you both for everything.
Nice picture, mr.
Dowd.
when was this picture taken? Uh, this summer.
And this man with the familial resemblance would be your uncle? Your much older brother? because I know there's no way it's your deceased father.
Taylor I nted to think that you were actually a human being, but you are a pig.
Okay, I lied.
In court! Oh, come on.
I wasn't under oath.
I was trying to win a case.
Anyway, how relevant is it whether or not my father's alive? It's extremely relevant, because that is why I slept with you! Oh, come on.
You didn't have such a bad time last night.
The quality of the time is irrelevant, because last night was a drunken, stupid mistake.
Any chance we can make the same drunken mistake again tonight? - Not even the slightest.
- Okay.
- If you change your mind-- - I won't.
Interesting.
Your new "office.
" Well, square footage-wise, it's an improvement.
Erything ready for tonight-- insurance, security, lighting rentals? Yeah, one of the perks of having a client roster as big as the phone book.
can I help you with something, sir? I came by to apologies are difficult for a man like me.
- But gratitude- - you helped me, sir.
What I mean is it's been some time since a case has made me, well, feel something.
I can see why you've been finding your new calling so fulfling.
Plus you got to meet George Michael.
You don't think he noticed, do you? It was barely obvious, sir.
I discovered his music back in the early years of this firm.
I was stuck on this hellacious document production-- just me and a roomful of files working past midnight for three weeks.
I'd stay so late, it was just me and the cleaning crew.
And one of them had a boom box, and all he played was - George Michael.
- George Michael.
Most nights, that was music was the only thing that kept me going.
I still associate it with my better days.
I doubt those days really were better.
They were.
And now as I enter the waning side of my life losing everything "is like the sun going down on me.
" sorry.
Thank you, Eli.
This has been the best week I've had in a lo time.
You l right? I may be getting there.
Look, I should havetold you about Beth.
- And, um, I should've- - Nate, shut up.
You didn't do anything except the girl I lost my virginity to.
Yeah.
- Is it gonna be weird between us? - No.
I'm used to weird by now.
And you're my brother, and even when I want to poke out your eyeballs I still love you.
So I've been thinkin' Rajapaksa.
He's our guy.
Sure about that? If you are.
You're the doctor, and I trust you.
Then he's the one we're picking.
And I'm sticking around to make sure he's the right choice.
are you, uh, sure you want to do this? I have never been more sure of anything in my life.
Is he gonna be okay? Jordan? He's gonna be st fine.
Well, you did a good thing this week, Eli.
You're the one dng the good thing, George.
A high school football stadium's kind of a step down from the staples center, but it means the world to these kids.
Well, you know, these days you just have to do - what you can to try and make a difference, don't you? - Yeah.
Can I give you a bit of advice? If anyone could.
I know I've had my share of hits, but I've taken a few hits, too.
And, uh, if there's anything I've learned, it's that no matter what, you just have to keep going.
Do you know what I mean? - I think I do.
- Good.
Well, that's settled, then.
Ladies and gentlemen-- mr.
George Michael! * I was mixed up when you came to me to broke to fix said * * "daddy get you gone I'm missing my baby"* * still missing my baby * * I was stitched up by the hands of fate said * * "how you gonna make it on your own if luck is a lady?" *
Uh, when do you take it out? Given the location of the aneurysm, surgery is a bad idea.
- who's that? - Beth Keller-- the Beth that was your first at bat? I feel awful.
And you broke up with me.
You wanna grab a drink? So Stone's out and Dowd's in.
- You're firing me? - I can't.
What I'm not obligatedo do is provide you with an office or an assistant.
It's been my aneurysm the whole damn time, and I'm gonna get this thing out of my head! That surgery could kill you! I won't have anything left to live for anyway.
There's gotta be a less humiliating outfit-- something that closes in the back, at least.
I overheard one of the nurses saying she thought your butt was cute.
Come on.
Don't be nervous.
All we're doing is talking about surgery on my brain what's there to be nervous about? - Blindness.
- Coma.
Long-term memory loss.
Sure, I can remove it.
It's no biggie.
- You've found your man.
- Really? - That's fantastic.
- Told you.
Just out of curiosity, how attached are you to your ability to speak? so I'd be a vegetable.
I wouldn't use the word "vegetable.
" Well, I was combining blindness, paralysis and permanent brain damage into one easy-to-remember category.
didn't you mention some hospital in china? Tin-tin puma? Tiantan Puhua.
And the news won't sound any better in Mandarin.
Look, Eli, are you sure this is something you really want? If the something is ending up a drooling idiot, then no.
But if it means getting the brain defect removed from my head that's making my life a living hell, then yes.
Well, the good news is you're already a drooling idiot, so the only thing left to do is pick a surgeon for the other thing.
Out of those guys? They didn't seem like they could remove a cap from a pen.
They're the best neurosurgeons I could get you in with.
Well, now let's try the ones that you couldn't get me in with.
All right, there's one-- Sanjay Rajapaksa, but he doesn't take walk-ins.
He only handles cases originating from his own hospital.
Or he did, until you applied your copious powers of persuasion.
All right, all right, I'll make a call.
You're the best.
Thank you.
Mm, don't thank me.
I just don't want to spend the rest of my life wiping drool off your chin.
Beth? Eli! What are you doing at the hospital? I, um I'm sorry.
I just didn't expect to see you.
Ben.
I'm bringing ben to the doctor.
You know he's not with you, right? Yes, he's at the psychologist.
They work one-on-one for an hour, individual counseling.
So how are you? I saw you on the news.
I was gonna call, but I figured, you know, you have enough on your plate.
Yeah, I've been better.
I, uh I got demoted.
I lost my office.
I had a fight with my acupuncturist/spiritual guide.
I alienated the one person at work who mistakenly admired me and made a serious ethical breach which helped get several hundred people kicked out of their homes and I-I broke up with Taylor.
That's oh, Eli.
If you ever need to talk, you still have my number, right? Yeah.
- I might just give you a call.
- okay.
Bye.
You'll never guess who I ran into.
Come on, Patti, guess.
You're not Patti.
No, um, I'm Bradley Kitsis.
I'm your temp.
Where's Patti? She's not here.
I noticed.
I can see, Bradley, at least for now.
Oh, she left me this note to read to you.
- Uh, "Eli, I'm taking a personal week" - Personal week? "To look after my friends and relatives" in Silver Terrace who, thanks to you, now have no homes.
" "No homes" is in capital letters, which is why I thanks, Brad.
I got it.
Our billables are up by 10% this quarter-- an increase almost entirely due to our success in the solinsky case.
I can't help but swell with fatherly pride.
I had a lot of help.
Perhaps you'd willing to apply your deft touch to judge Doyle.
This being Doyle "the il.
" Good luck.
Judge Doyle has just retained W.
P.
K.
in connection with a personal medical crisis.
Is he finally getting the pole removed from his rectum? I hear that can be a painful procedure.
Not nearly as painful as leukemia, mr.
Dowd.
Judge Doyle needs a bone marrow transplant to treat his cancer, but his only donor match backed out of the donation agreement yesterday.
And now that we've established your sensitivity to the judge's plight, you can assist Taylor.
Sir, Doyle the-- uh, judge Doyle hates me.
I'm sure you're familiar withmy "I could care less" face.
Moving on to other outstanding business * I can't light * * no more of your darkness * * all my pictures * * seem to fade to black and white * * it's much too late * * to save myself from falling * * closed the door * * and left me blinded by the light * ladies and gentlemen-- mr.
George Michael! Oh, no.
It's not.
Oh, no, it's not what? Are you Eli Stone? I'm George Michael.
would--would you mind not poking me, please? Well, I'm sorry, it's just, you know, you're very solid for a vision.
And you're a very odd man.
Well, at least I'm not a hallucination.
Well, he can see me.
Adley, do you see me talking to anyone? Real life? Actual person? Of course I do, sir.
That's Bone.
Yeah, it happens all the time.
I had the glasses first, by the way.
Mind you, Bone and I do have something in common in that we are both perfectly visible.
I'm sorry.
I think I've been wasting your time, mr.
Stone.
No, no, no.
Please, please, please, uh, stay.
I I'm sorry.
I just don't-- I don't typically get visits like this one.
what can I do for you, mr.
Michael? Call me George.
Um, well, I want you to take a case for me.
I found this in the "times.
" It's about a young girl who was thrown out of her high school for playing one of my songs at a school "abstinence" assembly.
Of course.
This was all over the news.
What was the song again? Uh, "I want your sex.
" Sorry, you're not my type.
It was a joke.
Anyway, uh, I want to hire you to help her get back in.
Now obviously I'll cover all the legal fees, mr.
Stone.
Call me Eli, and this is very generous of you.
Obviously, I wouldn't, uh I couldn't say no to you.
So if you don't mind me asking Why me? Why did you come to me? Well, you might think I'm the odd one now.
But the other night I had a dream, and, um, in the dream, I was completely lost, uh, when someone told me I needed to find a lawyer named Eli Stone.
Mr.
Wethersby? You were looking for me, sir? That would be inconsistent with the termination of our relationship, now wouldn't it? I ju heard that you wanted to see me, sir.
Maybe Bradley meant mr.
Posner.
No, he meant me.
I just didn't want you inferring that I actually craved this conversation.
Nevertheless, I understand that you've been retained by--who was it again? George Michael, the pop superstar? Yes, sir, unless there's a problem with that.
There is, actually-- two problems, in fact.
For one thing, you're still on probation.
Secondly, section 6.
3 paragraph "j" of the partnership agreement obligates a partner to oversee any case where the client has a high public profile.
Well, I guess it's good then that George isn't technically the client.
Her name is Molly Foster.
Shs 17 and much less famous, sir.
I don't have all day to waste on semantics.
If someone of mr.
Michael's esteem is involved in this case, then obviously the requirement to oversee applies.
Including appearing in court? And managing client relations, yes.
Okay, then.
Welcome to the case.
I'm sure mr.
Michael will appreciate having a senior partner on his team.
- As will Molly, sir.
- Who? Our client, Molly Foster.
Right.
Right.
I didn't expect this from Jordan Wethersby.
I ask him to send me his best lawyers.
He sends me a girl.
Well, let me introduce you to mr.
Wethersby's daughter, sir.
I wasn't talking about her, Dowd.
Good to see you, Taylor.
So let's get to it.
So you're worried about the, uh, lack of legal precedent? No, I'm worried about the lack of precedent in our favor.
Well, that's why I pay the 2 of you $550 an hour.
I know this is a long shot, but I have no choice.
I'm dying.
leukemia proessed to stageour.
Nowhere to go but down.
Did you tell the would-be donor? No, mr.
Dowd.
I wa him to think I need the painful extractions of his bone marrow for my personal collection.
Usually only family members are an exact match.
The would-be donor is a relative, isn't he? My son.
And he knows you're dying, and he still won't help you? We aren't exactly close.
He was 2 when his mother and I divorced, and I haven't seen Scott since then.
So the settlement conference we're scheduled to have in an hour is the first time you're seeg your son in 19 years? Okay! I'll have all the sharp objects removed from the conference room.
this is a critical meeting, obviously.
It's important that you let me do the talking, get us off on the right foot with Mary.
- Molly, sir.
- Understandably, she'll be reluctant to dive - into the legal waters, but-- Eli! George, hello again.
I'm sorry.
I'm not too late, am I? You're just off to see Molly? - Exactly.
No, you're just in time.
- Cool.
This is the firm's senior partner, Jordan Wethersby.
He's gonna be getting us off on the right foot.
Good to meet you, mr.
Wethersby.
Yes, it's, um - an honor, mr.
Michael.
- Yeah.
Call me George.
George.
It's good to see you again.
You make it sound like we just saw each other last week.
Why don't we all sit down? have you had a chance to review our proposal? Yes.
Scot this isn't I don't care about the money.
Well, unless I'm mistaken, judge Doyle already prevailed upon your more noble instincts.
I took the test.
Doctors started to describe the procedure to me, and I guess I had second thoughts, okay? I'm sorry.
I mean, it's not like I even know you or anything.
I know.
I know, and I'm sorry.
I truly aM.
But I'm asking for your help here.
And believe me when I tell ya, that's not something that comes easy for me.
I went through this phase where I'd send you things-- letters, report cards.
What did you ever do with those things anyway? I thought I thought I shouldn't promise a relationship I couldn't deliver on.
Yeah.
Yeah, well, I guess I can't deliver now.
Sorry.
I don't think we'll be settling.
you are a dead ringer.
It's amazing.
Mom, you have to see this George Michael impersonator Chloe hired! It's hilarious.
Hi, Molly.
It's great to meet you.
I've read about your expulsion from school, and I've hired these attorneys to help you get back in.
Shut up.
no way.
Please come in.
oh, can I get you gentlemen anything? Coffee? Maybe something british-- some crumpets or a pint of bitters? no, thank you.
That's fine.
sir, you're unusually quiet.
Are you feeling okay? I feel fine.
Don't ever touch me again.
- so you totally read about me? - Yep.
That is so cooL.
Why don't you tell us exactly what happened at school? There was this, um, lame-ass assembly-- the "abstinence only" assembly? Twice a semester, some expert in never, ever having sex tells us all about it.
After two years of this, um, bull, I decided to take a stand.
I snuck into the principal's office d played "I want your sex" er the P.
A.
The challenge here will be circumventing the supreme court's decision in morse vs.
Frederick, which limits the right to free speech on school grounds.
So you're saying I could lose? Always a possibility in litigation, ms.
Foster, but you gotta have "faith.
" Another one of your songs, I think.
Oh, that's right, yeah.
excuse me.
Hey, it's me.
I just got off the phone with Rajapaksa.
You remember? Super neurosurgeon? Well, uh, it took a lot of begging and a new set of golf clubs, but he's agreed to see you.
Obviously, it's a risk either way you slice it.
Actually, there won't be any slicing involved.
We burn it out of you.
That's just what I always wanted.
So you guys will talk and let me know? Yeah, we'll call you later.
Thank you so much, dr.
Rajapaksa.
Anytime.
awesome.
okay, there is an O.
R.
Free week after next with your name on it.
You sure that's the guy? Well, he's competent, confident, expert in the latest techniques.
Eli, if he were any more qualified, he'd be a fictionatv character.
I'm not asking for a description of him.
I'm asking if you think that's the guy.
I can't make that choice for you, Eli.
I it's too big.
I you're the only one who can do that.
You want this thing out or not I want it out.
I just--I'm not sure that this is the right time.
I'm having a strange week.
Well, coming from you, that's saying something.
George Michael showed up at my office-- for real this time-- don't joke--the same day I happened to bump into Beth, and she has kind of a connection with him.
Beth? BethKeller? Yeah.
Her son sees a doctor at this hospital.
I was thinking of giving her a call.
A-a call like-- - like a date, yes.
- Yeah.
why not? I'm newly single, about to be aneurysm-free.
Well, yeah, but but what? Nothing.
I just, you know, be careful, all right? I know I'm not the reason my parents split up and my father left, but when you're a kid, that's howt feels, you know, like it's your fault.
But now you have a chance at-- at reconciling with your father.
If I give him my bone marrow.
What kind of relationship do we stand to have with those kinds of strings attached? I'm curious.
How do you even know whether you're a compatible donor? I got tested.
Three months ago, he called me up.
No "how are you?" No "sorry I wrote you off.
" Just, "I've got canc.
Would you get your blood tested?" I take it the test determined that you are indeed a compatible donor? Yes, I'm a match.
Hoping the family similarities end there.
Why go through the steps of having yourself tested if you're not prepared to go through with the donation? Is it because maybe you have an obligation to your father, however estranged he may be? I got tested because I wanted to see if I was a match.
I wanted to see if I could save your life so I could tell you to go choke on it.
my reasons were just.
I knew I'd get in trouble.
I just didn't think I'd be expelled.
Did you not know that school policy gives the principal discretion to expel anyone whose--whose behavior "materially interferes with the learning of other students or disrupts the overall education process"? Yes, but that assumes what was happening at the assembly was learning.
The abstinence-only lady tells us condoms don't work, that girls who have abortions are more prone to suicide.
And because of all of those misconceptions, students in abstinence-only programs are less likely to use contraception.
Objection.
Are we to accept miss Foster as an expert witness? The plaintiff's knowledge-- or, I submit, lack thereof-- goes to the merits-- or lack thereof-- of the very pedagogy miss Foster's protest was taking issue with.
Miss Foster, please limit your answers to your direct experiences.
Molly, how has the school's policy affected you? First, my lab partner got pregnant.
Then, um, a friend--I don't want to tell her name, 'cause her mom would totally kill her-- she got gonorrhea in her throat.
I decided I had to do something.
Thank you, Molly.
Very descriptive.
And the "something" you cided to do was to play the song "I want your sex" at a school assembly? That's a very mature form of political protest.
The execution of ms.
Foster's protest isn't at issue here, only whether it's protected under our country's most cherished constitutional principles.
Is that an objection? A strenuous one, your honor.
Sustained.
There was no other course of action? You couldn't have organized a petition? I wanted to expose the hypocrisy.
And when you did, do you think you were being disruptive? I hope so.
Thk you.
No further questions.
That was invigorating.
it reminded me of my salad days-- standing up, p, making a compelling objection right in the middle of my direct examination.
On an issue of real significance-- not just freedom of speech, but the application of that right to our nation's youngest, ones who are truly disenfranchised-- not having the right to vote or something on your mind, mr.
Stone? I was just wondering if it was possible that you were A fanboy of a certain celebrity client.
Mr.
Stone, did you just characterize me, Jordan Wethersby II, senior partner of one of this country's most prestigious firms, a "fanboy"? Of course not, sir, but-- I didn't think so.
And for the record, my musical tastes are none of your concern.
In the name of all that's good and holy, what now? * they say we're young * * and we don't know we won't find out until we grow * * well, I don't know if all that's true 'cause you got me * * and, baby, I got you * * babe * * I got you, babe * * I got you, babe * * I gotyou, babe * "I got you, babe"? I hate that song.
I would never sing it under any circumstances, even hallucinatory ones.
Just like you would never go out with one of our co-workers.
Eli, is there something you want to ask me? No, 'cause I don't listen to my visions anymore, so well, considering last week, A.
K.
A.
bribing a judge, it's probably for the best.
Well, without admitting or denying anything, there won't be any more of that stuff, ause I'm-- I'm having it taken out the aneurysm.
- I thought it was too dangerous.
- Nah.
The ability to swallow's overrated.
Just tell me.
Is there something going on with you and matt? No.
You know, if you hadn't dumped me-- repeatedly, I might add-- I would say you were jealous.
I'm not jealous.
I'm not.
It's just been a rough week, okay? You wouldn't happen to have any time later, would you? I'll tell you all about it.
Look, I get the feeling you're alone right now.
So am I.
But I'm trying to move on.
So I can't be that shoulder for you to cry on.
I'm sorry.
I just--I can't.
That's okay.
Hey, Beth? It's Eli.
yeah, well, I was thinking about what you said the other day about, uh, needing to talk to someone, and, uh, I kinda do.
Principal Ackerman you said that Molly was expelled because her actions were a violation of school policy, correct? students have to learn about consequences.
That's why the school has a strict zero tolerance policy in those circumstances.
Zero tolerance? So you expel every kid who pulls a prank? Wh those pranks are disruptive.
So last fall, when the football team kidnapped the mascot from a rival high school, did you expel the whole team? I didn't deem that prank disruptive to the other students' educations.
What about when members of the senior class superglued the teacher's lounge door shut? Those students were suspended.
But not expelled? It sounds like your zero tolerance policy is more like a six tolerance policy.
- Objection.
- Pass the witness.
Principal Ackerman, why does your school have an abstinence-only program? Because it's the only sex education that the federal government will give us money for.
And if word got out that a student played a sexually explicit song during one of your assemblies-- I'd lose the funding, and the school would have no sex ed program.
Is that right? I don't know.
What I do know is that a girl playing a song that promotes promiscuous sex during a lecture on abstinence risks the program for everyone.
Your honor, the plaintiff would like to call a rebuttal witness-- Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou.
It's the legal name of the artist who wrote the offending song, your honor.
- Mr.
George Michael.
- Fine.
Court will recess until tomorrow.
You're a judge.
The case comes before you.
Do you order one human being to undergo a painful medical procedure to benefit another? Bottom line-- if I were a jurist on this, I could find precedent to support saving my life.
My son can be as angry as he wants at me, but the last time I checked, being a lousy dad didn't carry the death penalty.
You know, I had a dad.
He left my mother when I was 6 for her best friend.
I saw him summers and every other christmas.
I'm sorry.
At what point did mr.
Dowd become a witness? At the point when you let me finish.
My dad died three years ago.
And if I had a chance to save his life, I think the first thing I'd want to know is why I should.
Because regret's a lousy thing to live with.
Well, that's sweet.
They should put that in a poem or something.
We're all here wondering why Scott should feel any regret at all.
You are as much a stranger to him as my father was to me.
More so.
We're family, however estranged we may be.
Nothing changes that.
No, you changed it.
You walked out that door two decades ago, and you never look back.
And so I should die for that? Scott did give you cancer, judge.
- You want him to save you? - Yes.
Tell us.
Tell us why he should.
Because he's my son.
- He has an obligation- - No, he doesn't.
You pissed away any obligation he had to you.
Now tell us why he should help you now.
Because I want to live! I want to live.
The only chance I have of that is him.
Beth? Taylor.
We met at-- oh, your engagement party, of course.
It's so nice to see you.
What are you doing here? Is-- is everything okay?Your son? Oh, he's great, thanks.
No, I'm, um, I'm not here on business.
I'm having dinner.
- With Eli? - Yeah.
That's great.
Old friends catching up.
- Have fun.
- Thanks.
What are you doi? 'Cause I desperately, desperately need a margarita.
And you want me to come with you? Right! Great.
Well, let me just or not.
- no, she didn't.
- yes.
Yes, she did.
Melanie bose totally had the hots for you.
So that's why you were talking to me at that party? You were playing wingwoman for the girl with the headgear? when she found out that we slept togeer, she never talked to me again.
- that's because you were a college whore.
- I kW.
What? I just think--and this is a good week, you know? George Michael's here, my case is interesting, and and I haven't laughed like this in a long time.
Thanks for going out with me tonight.
It's my pleasure.
You know, all that's going on with you, I'm really glad that I can be here.
You don't know how nice it is to hear that.
Lately I've been less popular than melanie bose.
Well, you're just going through a rough time.
But think of all the people that you've helped-- okay, me and ben for two.
Winning that beutel trial totally changed our lives.
I mean, you have to know that.
I do know that.
I just--it just doesn't change the fact that that I'm alone.
I'm so sorry, Eli.
God.
I just broke the rule number one, you know? You don't tell a girl you're on a date with that you're lonely.
- Oh, god - what? - Are you okay? - Uh, yeah.
No.
Nate told me, um, he said that he was gonna tell you today.
Tell me what? - About you guys dating? - Yeah.
Oh, no.
Of course he told me that.
Thank god! oh, my god.
For a second there I thought maybe you didn't know.
Oh, no.
Well, that would be awkward.
to losers.
National order of total losers, San Francisco chapter, in session.
what--don't look at me like that.
You didn't have any plans tonight either, loser.
Believe me, I could have had plans-- plenty of plans with plenty of ladies.
All right, fine.
I'm the only loser, then.
To me.
No, you're not a loser, Taylor.
You're smart.
You're hot.
You're funny you're hot and an excellent drinker.
He's getting it out.
who's getting what out? Eli.
Aneurysm.
Out.
Bye-bye, aneurysm.
Turns out that's not why he dumped me anyway.
What are you talkin' about? I thought he wanted to protect me.
I thought he didn't want me to see him suffer.
Turns out the aneurysm was just an excuse.
Eli dumped me because he just didn't love me enough.
Well, I don't know much about aneurysms, but something's gotta be wrong if he dumped you.
That's sweet.
What you said in court today about ur dad-- now I know why you have to be so damn cocky all the time, why you only date these vapid bimbos.
You're scared that you're gonna be abandoned by someone you actually care about.
Sometimes it's just so hard to be the real me.
she told you.
Have you any idea how humiliating that was for me? - This isn't how I wanted you find out.
- That finally after months of-- of misery and loneliness and--and visions, I finally ask someone out, and I think we're making a connection, only to find out she's already dating my brother.
I-I was gonna tell you yesterday.
Yeah, I could tell from the way you didn't.
We had just come from the doctor.
You have all of these huge, life-altering decisions on your plate.
I didn't want to make things worse.
By telling me you were happy? I was trying to protect you.
Well, I'm a big boy, Nate.
You datingeth wouldn't have even registered if you'd have told me before I'd made an ass out of myself! Okay.
All right.
So you would have said, "hey, th's great.
You know, my life is tanking "worse than the latest ben stiller movie, but I'm so glad you're happy.
" Maybe I would have, yeah.
Who knows? I've been an--an idiot lately.
I pushed Taylor away.
I pushed maggie away, tti, chen.
I just--I just thought that no matter how much of an idiot I was, I wouldn't push my own brother away.
You haven't pushed me away.
You've been dating the girl I lost my virginity to for two months, and you haven't mentioned it.
I said I was sorry.
You call the doctors.
You make all the appointments.
But you don't want to go anywhere near this decision, 'cause you're afraid of how you're gonna feel if it doesn't work-- if I end up paralyzed or worse.
You're a doctor, but you're my big brother, man.
And I need you now more than ever.
But if this is your idea of helping me, thanks but no, thanks.
Eli, wait.
- Just wait! - god! come on, kitty, move.
You're on my jacket! Give him a pet.
Sonny Bone loves to be touched.
Your cat's name is Sonny Bone? That's so weird.
It was between that and "jason bourne.
" You're trying to sneak out of here, aren't you? I'm not sure I've ever been snuck out on before.
No, wait, I have.
I'm not sneaking out.
I'm just leaving quietly.
I've got court.
I know with me.
Please be seated.
It is profoundly disturbing to me that one human being could willfully deny another their last hope for life.
But that doesn't change the very real fact that there is no legal precedent to support judge Doyle's claim.
The plaintiff's suit for breach of contract and specific remedy of performance is hereby denied and judgment granted to the defendant.
Scott? Scott, I know I don't deserve what I'm asking for.
But please don't do anything that you mr.
Michael, tell me, what inspired your song, "I want your sex"? A song, by the way, which rose to number one on the world charts-- a song that helped you win a grammy for best album of the year.
Well, it was inspired by a relationship.
Like most of my work, it was autobiographical.
You heard principal Ackerman describe the song as encouraging promiscuity.
But it's just the opposite.
Ironically enough, I wrote the song about abstinence, and I was very much in love with someone at the time.
So how do you feel about your song being used to protest an abstinence-only sex education program? Well, I applaud it, obviously.
When I wrote it, we were in year six of the A.
I.
D.
S.
crisis, a crisis that Ronald Reagan did not even address publicly until there were over And what the government is doing right now-- funding federal programs that tell children that condoms don't work-- is killing people all over again.
Thank you, mr.
Michael.
These are the lyrics to "I want your sex.
" Would you please read the highlighted portion? "Sex is natural.
Sex is good.
Not everybody does it, but everybody should.
" Do you not think? Do you deny that these lyrics could be understood to promote sexual activity? No, to deny that would be ridiculous.
Nothing further, your honor.
But would ms.
Abrams' interpretation of the lyrics be appropriate in the context of an abstinence-only sex education program? Well, I don't think I can answer that, because an abstinence-only "sex education program" is an oxymoron.
Abstinence can only be a choice if you have all the facts.
I love this country.
I love the fact that you guys have a constitution, that you practice separation of church and state.
But I don't think I'm alone in wondering what's going on with all that right now, and, um, in my opinion, right now America could use a lot more people like Molly.
The whole world could.
The clock is ticking.
Judge Tate's decision is imminent.
My recommendation would be to settle this now.
Get out while you can.
We don't want out.
Judge Tate is not going to insert herself into what is clearly a school matter.
Consider mr.
Michael's testimony.
Judge Tate certainly will.
Not to mention, all the negative media attention has to be getting to you.
Just wait until George does his press conference.
That's a good point, sir.
You know what? This isn't worth it.
Enough is enough.
We'll reinstate Molly, all right? No! I did this to make a point.
I want the school to have a real sex education program.
We've been through this.
There's no way.
I'm sorry, Molly, but the school can't have a sex ed program that doesn't receive federal funding.
Well, actually, I think I know how we can raise that kind of money in one night.
A hero arises.
Lly, how fast can you get a message out? Six seconds.
There are other avenues we can pursue-- other angles, more money.
Everyone has a price.
We could appeal to his mother.
She may see things our way.
No, I I think we all know I'm getting exactly what I deserve.
Judge use what time you have left.
Reach out.
Make contact with your son.
No, I'm I'm done using other people for my benefit.
Then do it for his.
His testimony was proof.
He needs to let go of some of that anger.
Otherwise, he'll end up just like "the boil"? You make a persuasive argument, Taylor.
And thank you both for everything.
Nice picture, mr.
Dowd.
when was this picture taken? Uh, this summer.
And this man with the familial resemblance would be your uncle? Your much older brother? because I know there's no way it's your deceased father.
Taylor I nted to think that you were actually a human being, but you are a pig.
Okay, I lied.
In court! Oh, come on.
I wasn't under oath.
I was trying to win a case.
Anyway, how relevant is it whether or not my father's alive? It's extremely relevant, because that is why I slept with you! Oh, come on.
You didn't have such a bad time last night.
The quality of the time is irrelevant, because last night was a drunken, stupid mistake.
Any chance we can make the same drunken mistake again tonight? - Not even the slightest.
- Okay.
- If you change your mind-- - I won't.
Interesting.
Your new "office.
" Well, square footage-wise, it's an improvement.
Erything ready for tonight-- insurance, security, lighting rentals? Yeah, one of the perks of having a client roster as big as the phone book.
can I help you with something, sir? I came by to apologies are difficult for a man like me.
- But gratitude- - you helped me, sir.
What I mean is it's been some time since a case has made me, well, feel something.
I can see why you've been finding your new calling so fulfling.
Plus you got to meet George Michael.
You don't think he noticed, do you? It was barely obvious, sir.
I discovered his music back in the early years of this firm.
I was stuck on this hellacious document production-- just me and a roomful of files working past midnight for three weeks.
I'd stay so late, it was just me and the cleaning crew.
And one of them had a boom box, and all he played was - George Michael.
- George Michael.
Most nights, that was music was the only thing that kept me going.
I still associate it with my better days.
I doubt those days really were better.
They were.
And now as I enter the waning side of my life losing everything "is like the sun going down on me.
" sorry.
Thank you, Eli.
This has been the best week I've had in a lo time.
You l right? I may be getting there.
Look, I should havetold you about Beth.
- And, um, I should've- - Nate, shut up.
You didn't do anything except the girl I lost my virginity to.
Yeah.
- Is it gonna be weird between us? - No.
I'm used to weird by now.
And you're my brother, and even when I want to poke out your eyeballs I still love you.
So I've been thinkin' Rajapaksa.
He's our guy.
Sure about that? If you are.
You're the doctor, and I trust you.
Then he's the one we're picking.
And I'm sticking around to make sure he's the right choice.
are you, uh, sure you want to do this? I have never been more sure of anything in my life.
Is he gonna be okay? Jordan? He's gonna be st fine.
Well, you did a good thing this week, Eli.
You're the one dng the good thing, George.
A high school football stadium's kind of a step down from the staples center, but it means the world to these kids.
Well, you know, these days you just have to do - what you can to try and make a difference, don't you? - Yeah.
Can I give you a bit of advice? If anyone could.
I know I've had my share of hits, but I've taken a few hits, too.
And, uh, if there's anything I've learned, it's that no matter what, you just have to keep going.
Do you know what I mean? - I think I do.
- Good.
Well, that's settled, then.
Ladies and gentlemen-- mr.
George Michael! * I was mixed up when you came to me to broke to fix said * * "daddy get you gone I'm missing my baby"* * still missing my baby * * I was stitched up by the hands of fate said * * "how you gonna make it on your own if luck is a lady?" *