Hindsight (2015) s01e09 Episode Script
All I Want for Christmas is You
Previously on "Hindsight" Kevin's leaving tomorrow and I'm still stuck in the friend-zone.
He has no idea how you feel? I picked up a side job catering private events.
I could use the cash.
I'll meet you guys at the rave! Looks like it's just you and me.
- What do you do? - I'm an artist.
- I'm Noelle.
- Really? Noelle was just showing me some artwork.
- Peek-a-boo.
- Yes.
You should come, dude.
I am going to the Dominican Republic.
There's something I have to tell you.
What are we doing here, Becca? Have you slept with him? I love him.
This friendship, it's over.
Lolly! Are you okay? Maybe none of this is predestined.
Well, I guess we'll find out.
There's something you should know! Morning.
Afternoon.
Right.
Yeah.
Crazy night.
Yeah, that was That was crazy.
Hey, what was that one song last night? The one that was like They were all like that.
Catchy.
So Did you have fun last night? Yeah.
Are you kidding me? One of the best nights of my life.
I mean, how many guys get to say they got to go out with the two prettiest girls in New York? Only you.
We can't do this anymore.
I'm so sorry.
It isn't fair to Lolly.
Hey.
Hey.
No.
What were we doing last night? I can barely move my jaw.
Yeah, I heard that happens on Ecstasy.
Though, it could be the three-hour long story you told me about how Pogs were your idea.
Which I hear also happens on E.
E causes Pog stories? That's such an oddly specific side-effect.
Hey, want to go get brunch? There's a great place across the street.
We slept through brunch.
You didn't have to sleep on the floor.
I get really fidgety in my sleep.
I didn't want to bug you.
You wouldn't have bugged me.
Want to get get lunch then? Or linner? I can't.
I got to run a bunch of errands.
Well, let's get dinner at Fu's Palace.
It's Sunday and I'm half Jewish, so Chinese restaurants are my family's house of worship.
You don't want to anger God in two religions.
Well, if it'll save me from eternal damnation, how can I say no? You're lucky I slept with you before you showed me this.
I'm also lucky I didn't buy you breakfast before I kicked you out.
I do not like people going through my stuff.
I can see why.
Damage is already done.
It's just fun.
You're really talented.
A little unfocused in some areas, but I can help with that.
While we're pointing out each other's flaws, I just noticed a really annoying one with you.
You care to know what it is? Takes a lot more than just talent to make it as an artist.
You need to know what sells and who's buying and it's It's not just collectors.
Businesses pay a lot of money for the artwork in their lobbies.
You need to paint with that in mind.
So I can proudly display my painting in a dentist's office? We all need to start somewhere.
This Will never sell.
People are miserable enough getting their teeth pulled.
They don't need to look at Whatever this is.
This I like.
I do.
You need to paint more like this.
Any painting in a dentist's office makes me want to pull my own teeth out.
I have something that will change your mind.
An artist that I discovered is having a party.
You should come with.
You're gonna meet a lot of really important people, and you'll get to sleep with a hot girl.
Well, I guess I can't argue with logic like that.
So don't.
What's happening, hot stuff? I'm meeting Kevin for dinner.
Whoo.
Yay.
I see you're wearing your kiss-me lipstick and your sleep-with-me dress.
Don't worry.
My three-way shoes are in the closet.
Okay, so things went good last night.
You got him off the couch.
Yep.
From the couch to my floor.
At least it's closer to my bed.
Baby-steps.
Wait a second.
I'm confused.
So you told him how you felt, you guys made out, and then he slept on your floor? Exactly.
Except, I never told him how I felt.
I just kissed him, but it was the kind of kiss that said, "I like you more than a friend and I want to start dating exclusively.
" No, Lolly, you need to tell him how you feel.
Okay? Use your words, instead of your tongue.
I'll tell him at dinner.
- I'll get him all hopped up on Scorpion Bowls and MSG, and I'll just let him have it.
Yeah.
If all goes right, he won't be the only one sleeping on the floor tonight.
That made more sense in my head.
I knew what you meant.
You're nervous.
Why would I be nervous? Just 'cause I'm about to tell one of my good friends that I love him? I'm totally fine.
Now will you please help me with this before I poke my eye out? Yeah.
Now I'm nervous.
Breathe.
It's gonna go great tonight.
Why are you being so nice to me? Because you're letting me.
Nobody knows what they're saying.
Yes, I totally do.
Listen.
- Okay, that's awesome.
- See? Thank you very much.
I will be here all night.
That's awesome.
Wow.
So I kind of wanted to, um To talk to you about something.
Yeah? Um, well, um, we've known each other for a really long time, and I ooh, Fortune cookies! I love these.
What's it say? It says, "you will find happiness with your friend once you tell him that you want to be more than friends.
" What does yours say? It says, um, "you're one of my oldest friends, and I love you" "But you're like a sister to me.
" Is there another cookie? Morning.
You want some coffee? Shh.
You're out of filters, so I used paper towels.
Also, you're out of paper towels.
Hey.
I need to talk to you on the roof now.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Are you serious? It's like 25 degrees outside.
You're right.
What the hell's wrong with you? I'm cold, for starters.
Could we have this conversation somewhere else, like, the boiler room Do you know what I was doing last night? Figuring out the coldest place in New York City to yell at me? You want to talk about cold? Lolly was in my room, crying, all night.
I didn't mean to hurt her.
I just She caught me by surprise.
I had no idea she felt that way.
I know that look.
Not even you believe what you're saying right now.
What look? How do you know my looks? I just do.
What do you want me to say? I don't have those feelings for her.
Then why did you kiss her? She kissed me.
Well, you didn't exactly push her away.
You're right.
That was a mistake.
It won't happen again.
This isn't just about the kiss.
I mean, do you know how hard it is when you have feelings for someone who's sleeping in the next room? Maybe you should just find someplace else to stay.
I know.
I looked at some places yesterday.
I'll be gone soon.
Great.
My Girl? Bleh! We heard it was a sweet movie.
I used to feel sad for Anna Chlumsky when Macaulay died, but she got off easy.
Eventually, he would have told her she was like a sister.
Then she'd wish she was the one stung to death by bees.
Did you seriously just ruin the movie for us? No.
Jamie Lee Curtis will ruin the movie for you.
Why is everyone so stupid? I love this new you.
Keep it up.
Hi.
Cash or credit? Are you okay? Zang.
Yeah.
That's what I thought.
So this is why we're gonna do everything you love to do today.
We're gonna have drinks and go shopping, have drinks and go ice skating, and we're gonna have drinks and go out drinking.
Lame! You want to know what I would do? First, I'd go downtown, see my favorite Tibetan Monk Cover band, Sister's Dream Hood, next, I'd go to this all-night laundry mat that hosts amazing vegan poetry slam.
Have you heard of little humus? Okay.
Enough.
Now I'm depressed.
I just want to stay here and work on my new list.
I am afraid to guess what that list is.
Observe the board.
Doomed relationships: She's a man, he's a fly, he has a really huge head, I'm like a sister.
We're all grotesque in our own ways.
Okay, Lolly, you are a lot of things, but Rocky Dennis is not one of them.
What is it gonna take for you to get out of this Kevin-funk? Let's have a party.
No.
What kind of party? Any kind of party you want.
My parents are out of town.
We can have it there.
Am I invited? Okay.
I'm in.
- Am I invited? - Whoo! Okay, I'll go get the place ready.
Okay.
Okay? I'll go call Paige.
- Okay.
- Am I invited? Whoo! I'm invited.
Hi.
Look who finally decided to show.
I'm ten minutes early.
Chester's just having his daily freak-out.
What's wrong? - Nothing.
- Everything! - Your viral marketing worked.
- What? There's even mention of it in Musto's column in The Voice.
"Stickers plastered around the city have New Yorkers wondering 'what's hot?'".
My God.
This is great, isn't it? It puts more pressure on us.
Everyone's talking about the stickers, but we need them talking about our magazine.
All of this is for nothing if people don't read it.
Nothing's gonna go wrong.
Okay? I talked to every newsstand and they all agreed to display the magazine right out front.
We've got all of our bases covered.
All I'm saying is that we shouldn't start celebrating just yet.
Would you relax, Chester? Nobody is celebrating.
Really? Care to explain this? It's pretty self-explanatory, I think.
I've been fax-viting everyone.
But mainly hot guys.
I didn't get one.
My God.
Does fax-viting become a thing in the future? Should I patent it? Yeah.
That's how you make your first million.
- Really? - No! Faxing is barely a thing in the future.
So mean.
Okay, when I said party, I was thinking, like, a couple friends, mellow You said I could have any kind of party I wanted.
Does 40-year-old Becca think that we should drink Chardonnay and play Pictionary and Sebastian, what's something boring you do? Listen to you and Becca talk.
Fine.
We'll do it your way.
Also known as the fun way.
Besides, my best friend is about to become a published writer.
I think that deserves a celebration A celebration full of hot guys.
Well, when you put it that way - Hey.
- Hey! Whoa, easy, Tyson.
You should never sneak up on a woman.
I didn't realize I was sneaking.
I tried calling you.
Did you get my message? Yeah, I've been busy.
How did Noelle like your stuff? As a matter of fact, she liked it a lot.
She invited me to a party tomorrow to mingle with the glitterati.
Lucky you.
Yeah, it's not really my thing.
I wish I could bring you as my wingman and you'd give me suggestions on how to act around those people.
Let's see, art people are very self-absorbed.
That should be easy enough for you.
Whoa.
What's that supposed to mean? Nothing.
Just have fun at your party, Sean.
I got to go.
As long as you think so.
That matters.
Hey.
Hey.
What are you doing? I thought you said you were staying.
Yeah, in the city.
Just not here.
Is this because of the fortune cookie? Because those things are rarely accurate.
Of course not.
I just felt like it was time that I got my own place.
I even talked to Becca about it.
Becca? What does she have to do with it? It's not her decision to make.
I know.
It's my decision.
This doesn't change anything between us.
This way, I'll be out of your hair.
But I like you in my hair.
It's for the best.
Trust me.
I'll call you tomorrow.
Yeah.
Did you tell Kevin to move out? I hated seeing you so upset.
I thought it'd be better for you if he wasn't here.
I really don't think you had any right to do that.
I was worried about you, Lolly.
I mean, you can't get over a guy who's sleeping on the couch.
He was sleeping on my floor! And if I wanted him gone, I'm a grownup, and I'm more than capable of telling him so.
Like now, for instance.
I no longer want to be in the same room as you.
Watch.
"Lolly, get out of here.
" "Fine, Lolly.
I will.
" See? I was just trying to help.
You know what? Kevin is my business.
So just please, just stay out of it.
What's up, Becs? Jesus.
Jamie.
What are you doing here? The same thing you are, stealing from mom and dad while they're away.
Um, I'm not stealing.
I'm having a party.
You look good.
When did you get back? About a week ago.
I know I probably should have called but Stan got me a job at his dad's company, and I'm working these crazy hours.
At least I get to pay for that extra semester.
Jamie, that's awesome.
My God.
I'm so glad you're home.
Yes.
Yeah, I don't know why you thought I was gonna be gone forever.
I take it mom and dad don't know that you're throwing a party here.
No, and you're not gonna tell them.
And I have to cheer Lolly up, and our place is depressingly small.
What's the matter with Lolly? Um It's about a dude.
It's okay.
What happened? To make a long story short, she likes someone who's not into her.
So she's upset.
And on top of it, she's mad at me.
What'd you do? Why do you assume it's my fault? Isn't it always? No, and don't you want to hear my side of the story? No, not really.
You know, you really should just be the bigger person and apologize.
Especially if she's sad, you know? It sucks getting rejected.
Okay, I don't know who this person is right now with a hair cut and a cranberry button-up and good advice.
Fine.
I'm gonna apologize.
Even though I was just trying to help.
You know, when I apologize to a girl, I usually get her flowers.
Do girls get flowers for each other? This is how an artist should live.
I thought artists were supposed to live in squalor.
Cut off their own ears.
Only those who weren't lucky enough to meet me.
Thank you.
Exhibit A.
Guy standing with all the admirers, that's Diego.
I discovered him.
This is his loft, and these are all his pieces.
Diego.
The place looks amazing.
This is Sean Reeves.
Thanks for letting me crash your party.
I admire your work.
Thanks.
Can you imagine, five years ago, I was posing nude for drawing classes just to make rent.
Now I only pose for fun.
You're too much.
He's ridiculous.
Do you think you're more talented than he is? You're right.
So just imagine what I can do for you.
This place is sweet.
I can't believe Becca's letting you have a party here.
Don't try to butter me up.
- Okay.
- I am still mad at her.
Got it.
'Tis the season! I'm so sorry, Loll.
I come offering an olive branch.
Or a pine.
Or whatever that thing is.
A fir? Froot Loops, Lucky Charms, Boo Berry? You shouldn't have.
I'm just saying that.
You absolutely should have.
And I'm so glad you did.
I'm sorry.
Will you forgive me? - I'm so sorry.
- You really hold a grudge.
Um, cereal tree.
Whoo! Drinks.
Yes.
For you.
- For you.
- Thank you.
Okay.
So let's make a pact.
We all kiss someone tonight.
Just to be safe, I brought a ton of mistletoe.
No excuses.
You have to kiss someone under the mistletoe.
Okay? Rules is rules.
- Fine.
- Cheers.
Cheers! This one isn't as bad as the others.
Looks like something you'd find in a dentist's office.
Are you an artist? Yeah.
Are your paintings being shown anywhere? Just the walls in my loft.
It's very exclusive.
You're in good company.
David Shea owns galleries all over the world.
He's done wonders for Diego, plucked him out of obscurity.
I thought Noelle discovered Diego.
I've never heard of her.
He likes them young.
Doesn't he? This party blows.
There's barely any girls here.
Nice to see you too, Sebastian.
This party's awesome.
There's barely any girls here.
Every guy is talking to me.
Excuse me.
See? Normally, I'd have to settle for someone like him.
I'm thinking it's a two-Zima kind of night.
God.
What a mess.
My parents are gonna kill me.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Are you having fun? - Yeah.
Making drinks for drunk frat boys.
Just like work.
Except I'm not getting paid.
Can I have one? Yes.
Thank you.
What is Kevin doing here? I invited him.
I'm nobody's sister.
Hey, why did you invite Kevin? Yeah, why did you invite Kevin? Why wouldn't I? Because the whole point of having this party is to help you get over him.
No.
The whole point of the party was to have fun, which I am having, to cut loose, which I think I'm doing a pretty good job of cutting.
And to have a good night with friends, which Kevin is.
Okay, as much as I love your dress, it doesn't really exactly scream "friends.
" There's plenty of other hot guys here.
But if Kevin happens to think I look hot, well, then I guess that just can't be helped.
Kevin! Hey! Hey.
When did you get here? I thought you saw me come in.
Yay! This is awesome.
- All my friends are here.
I'm so happy.
- Yay.
- Here, let me take that.
- Thanks.
Watch out.
My God, is this you? Yeah.
I thought I put all those away.
God, that's embarrassing.
You want to talk embarrassing, I actually had that same costume.
But I'm a boy, so Hey, I'm sorry if I was harsh the other morning.
I was just trying to protect Lolly.
I know.
She's lucky to have you.
No.
I'm the lucky one.
There's no one else like her.
Hey, are we cool? 'Cause I don't want you to think I'm, like, a bad guy.
What do you care what I think? We barely know each other.
I don't know.
I just do.
I know you're a good guy, Kevin.
'Tis the season to be Lolly.
Wow.
You clean up nice.
Structure.
You dirty up nice.
The limited.
Thanks for noticing.
It's kind of hard not to.
Yeah, you'd be surprised.
Is that the guy? Becca told me.
You know she can't keep her mouth shut.
Let me know if you want to make him jealous.
Is everything okay? Yeah.
Why wouldn't it be? I saw you arguing with David Shea.
I heard he was someone I should know.
He's not as great as everyone thinks.
But isn't that the reason you invited me here tonight, to meet people like that? I don't know why I invited you, because you've done nothing but complain since we walked in the door.
I thought I could help you.
Maybe I was wrong.
I shouldn't have brought you.
No, I shouldn't have come.
Sean, I-I'm sorry.
Hey! You guys are here.
I'm so glad you came.
Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Thanks for having us.
So am I.
- Hi, there.
- Out of bounds.
I thought Chester could use a drink.
And by Chester, I meant me, and by a drink, I meant three.
Did you call to double-check that the magazines will be dropped off? I did.
I even triple-checked.
Why? Was something wrong? No.
Everything's fine, Chester.
Triply fine.
I should check our messages.
Is there a phone? Kitchen.
Do you see why I needed a drink? Why doesn't he trust me? Well, he quit a great job at the New Yorker and put everything into the magazine, so if Thermal fails, so does he.
And he put you in charge of 1/3 of our inventory.
I mean, if that's not trust, I don't know what is.
Pardon me.
Hey, love guru.
What kind of collection is this? Lank's Hill '91? Never even heard of it.
Yeah, that's my dad's colonoscopy.
You ever watch it? Many, many times.
Just put it back.
Hey.
You know what they say about mistletoes, right? Mistletoe? It's one toe.
Keep moving.
Yes.
- No.
Nay.
- Nay? Lolly's gonna be upset if you break our pact.
Lolly's gonna be upset anyway.
What's going on with you and Kevin? - Me and Kevin? - Yeah.
Nothing.
Why would you ask me that? I have been working in bars for years.
Every night, I see people meeting, fighting, falling in love, sometimes all three at once.
I know the look when I see it.
No, I don't know what look you're talking about.
Honestly.
That look.
What? - That look.
- No.
That was not a look.
Okay.
Well, neither was the Whatever you think you saw between me and Kevin.
Okay.
Okay.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I hope you don't mind that I'm here.
I got a fax-vite from Lolly.
No, I don't mind.
I thought it'd be weird, but then I figured, "screw it, weird seems to be the norm for us these days.
" Well, we're even steven now, right? No, I just mean that we've both broken up with each other.
So it's a tie.
I don't think it works like that, but okay.
Well, it's nice that you're here.
Although I'm pretty sure it's not to see me.
I don't think she wants to speak to me.
You two fighting? I didn't think so, but women never tell men when they're fighting with them, so Well, you should always assume there's a fight going on, and you should always assume it's your fault.
Yeah.
No, for real, though, you should Just be the bigger person and apologize.
Yeah.
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas.
Good luck.
Yeah, the Dominican was fun, but you miss the little things like speaking English.
My God.
You are so funny! All right, let's tone it down a notch.
No guy's gonna believe that laugh is real.
What the hell is he saying? I've talked to him before, lots of times.
He's not that interesting.
Okay, he's pretty interesting.
All right, wait.
Gimme that.
He's coming.
Be cool.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Thanks for inviting me.
Hope that cab driver accepts chocolate coins, otherwise, he'll have to accept me running from the cab.
Wait.
You're leaving? But you just You just got here.
Yeah.
I got to get up really early and let the repairman in.
Basically everything at my new place is broken.
Mistletoe.
Who put that there? Well, I guess this means we have to kiss.
I mean, rules is rules.
See you later.
He really doesn't like me back.
Well, I love you, like a sister.
I hate you.
Victoria, let's go.
Hey hey, hey.
Where are you guys going? It's after midnight.
The magazine should be out already.
I've been trying for 20 minutes to get Victoria away from that hot Todd guy.
- Come on.
- Make sure he has my number.
Go.
Go.
Go.
Are you sure? - Go.
- Okay.
You know, I've had this drink, and it's really not worth the hangover.
You know, I'm kind of glad that creepy fisherman left.
Boring the hell out of everybody with his sea shanties.
Say something else mean about him.
He's an idiot.
He could have kissed the prettiest girl at the party, and He went home alone.
I don't see any mistletoe.
Maybe there's some in your room.
What are you doing out here? I needed to be alone.
Yeah, I used to come up here when I couldn't take any more of Becca's mum asking me what my plan was for when the art thing didn't work out.
It's a good hiding spot.
Obviously, not good enough.
Why are you so nasty to me? If you don't like my attitude, why don't you just run back to Noelle? If I wanted to be with Noelle, I'd still be drinking overpriced champagne and pretending that a blurry circle is a masterpiece, but I'm here.
Why? I sure as hell can't help you with your career.
Why do you care who I date, Paige? What difference does it make to you? Because I like you, you idiot.
This is why I don't let my guard down.
Because I always end up getting hurt.
I didn't know your guard was down.
How could you not know? Remember? I'm an idiot.
I can't deal with this.
I'm going back inside.
Wait, Paige.
I have something I have to tell you.
I like you too.
No! He said he'd put it right here.
I knew this would happen.
I should've done it myself.
Chester, relax, okay? I'm sure there's a good explanation.
Gus, what happened to the Thermal issues? You promised you'd put them out.
I did, and now they're gone.
What do you mean they're gone? Where did they go? You see, the way it works is, people come and take magazines and then they walk away.
Wait, you're saying that all the magazines were taken in 30 minutes? Not all of them.
I saved you one.
You should bring me more next time.
We should celebrate! My gosh! Whoa.
I didn't know this was a thing.
- It is.
- It isn't.
Wow.
Now that was some crazy-ass mistletoe.
Was I that bad? No.
Of course you weren't bad.
It's it shouldn't have happened.
I was feeling vulnerable.
And you you're such a great guy, but I Lolly, stop.
You don't need to give me the breakup speech again.
I know exactly what this was.
What was it? A Christmas miracle.
Jamie, I'm serious.
So am I.
Really, we're cool.
I'm gonna take a shower.
Hey, let me know next time you want to make someone jealous, all right? What is with guys kissing me on the forehead lately? Hey, it's Sean.
Thanks for letting your guard down and for telling me about it this time.
Talk to you soon.
Good morning.
Good morning.
How was your party? Did you get lucky? As a matter of fact, I did.
I'm so proud of you.
- Thank you.
- Yes.
Hey.
Nice, dude.
Yeah, the pharmacy's back open.
Our customers will be stoked.
Hey, listen, man, we really need to be careful with this.
I don't want my dad finding out and getting in any trouble.
Okay, McGruff.
You know, your dad's the reason you're in this spot in the first place.
Besides, who's more important, Lincoln or Benjamin? I'm sorry.
Great.
Now go be sorry somewhere else.
You know what? You don't understand.
Which part? The part about you lying to me about discovering Diego, or you using me to make your sugar daddy jealous? He's not my sugar daddy.
It's my actual daddy.
And I lied to you because I was trying to impress you.
I was arguing with my father because I thought that if I could convince him to see your stuff, he would admit that I actually have an eye for talent.
And he finally agreed to.
I don't know what to say.
Say you'll give me another chance? Invite me in to pick out some pieces to show him? Unless you have other plans.
Thought I might find you up here.
Where it's freezing cold.
What are you doing here? Still feel bad about the way things went down with Lolly.
Wish I felt the same way.
It would make everything so much easier.
Why are you telling me this? She likes you.
You don't like her.
What else is there to say? That there's someone else.
Do you believe in alternate universes? I- I don't know, maybe.
I don't, which is gonna make what I'm about to say sound insane.
Then don't say it.
I have to.
Ever since I met you, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you.
I know it sounds crazy.
I feel like I've known you my whole life.
Kevin, no, don't do this, please.
Don't do this.
I like you.
The way you look at me makes me think you like me too.
Maybe not the way you're looking at me now.
Say something.
I- I think you're right.
I think you sound crazy.
What are you doing? Something I've wanted to do since I first met you.
You shouldn't have done that.
He has no idea how you feel? I picked up a side job catering private events.
I could use the cash.
I'll meet you guys at the rave! Looks like it's just you and me.
- What do you do? - I'm an artist.
- I'm Noelle.
- Really? Noelle was just showing me some artwork.
- Peek-a-boo.
- Yes.
You should come, dude.
I am going to the Dominican Republic.
There's something I have to tell you.
What are we doing here, Becca? Have you slept with him? I love him.
This friendship, it's over.
Lolly! Are you okay? Maybe none of this is predestined.
Well, I guess we'll find out.
There's something you should know! Morning.
Afternoon.
Right.
Yeah.
Crazy night.
Yeah, that was That was crazy.
Hey, what was that one song last night? The one that was like They were all like that.
Catchy.
So Did you have fun last night? Yeah.
Are you kidding me? One of the best nights of my life.
I mean, how many guys get to say they got to go out with the two prettiest girls in New York? Only you.
We can't do this anymore.
I'm so sorry.
It isn't fair to Lolly.
Hey.
Hey.
No.
What were we doing last night? I can barely move my jaw.
Yeah, I heard that happens on Ecstasy.
Though, it could be the three-hour long story you told me about how Pogs were your idea.
Which I hear also happens on E.
E causes Pog stories? That's such an oddly specific side-effect.
Hey, want to go get brunch? There's a great place across the street.
We slept through brunch.
You didn't have to sleep on the floor.
I get really fidgety in my sleep.
I didn't want to bug you.
You wouldn't have bugged me.
Want to get get lunch then? Or linner? I can't.
I got to run a bunch of errands.
Well, let's get dinner at Fu's Palace.
It's Sunday and I'm half Jewish, so Chinese restaurants are my family's house of worship.
You don't want to anger God in two religions.
Well, if it'll save me from eternal damnation, how can I say no? You're lucky I slept with you before you showed me this.
I'm also lucky I didn't buy you breakfast before I kicked you out.
I do not like people going through my stuff.
I can see why.
Damage is already done.
It's just fun.
You're really talented.
A little unfocused in some areas, but I can help with that.
While we're pointing out each other's flaws, I just noticed a really annoying one with you.
You care to know what it is? Takes a lot more than just talent to make it as an artist.
You need to know what sells and who's buying and it's It's not just collectors.
Businesses pay a lot of money for the artwork in their lobbies.
You need to paint with that in mind.
So I can proudly display my painting in a dentist's office? We all need to start somewhere.
This Will never sell.
People are miserable enough getting their teeth pulled.
They don't need to look at Whatever this is.
This I like.
I do.
You need to paint more like this.
Any painting in a dentist's office makes me want to pull my own teeth out.
I have something that will change your mind.
An artist that I discovered is having a party.
You should come with.
You're gonna meet a lot of really important people, and you'll get to sleep with a hot girl.
Well, I guess I can't argue with logic like that.
So don't.
What's happening, hot stuff? I'm meeting Kevin for dinner.
Whoo.
Yay.
I see you're wearing your kiss-me lipstick and your sleep-with-me dress.
Don't worry.
My three-way shoes are in the closet.
Okay, so things went good last night.
You got him off the couch.
Yep.
From the couch to my floor.
At least it's closer to my bed.
Baby-steps.
Wait a second.
I'm confused.
So you told him how you felt, you guys made out, and then he slept on your floor? Exactly.
Except, I never told him how I felt.
I just kissed him, but it was the kind of kiss that said, "I like you more than a friend and I want to start dating exclusively.
" No, Lolly, you need to tell him how you feel.
Okay? Use your words, instead of your tongue.
I'll tell him at dinner.
- I'll get him all hopped up on Scorpion Bowls and MSG, and I'll just let him have it.
Yeah.
If all goes right, he won't be the only one sleeping on the floor tonight.
That made more sense in my head.
I knew what you meant.
You're nervous.
Why would I be nervous? Just 'cause I'm about to tell one of my good friends that I love him? I'm totally fine.
Now will you please help me with this before I poke my eye out? Yeah.
Now I'm nervous.
Breathe.
It's gonna go great tonight.
Why are you being so nice to me? Because you're letting me.
Nobody knows what they're saying.
Yes, I totally do.
Listen.
- Okay, that's awesome.
- See? Thank you very much.
I will be here all night.
That's awesome.
Wow.
So I kind of wanted to, um To talk to you about something.
Yeah? Um, well, um, we've known each other for a really long time, and I ooh, Fortune cookies! I love these.
What's it say? It says, "you will find happiness with your friend once you tell him that you want to be more than friends.
" What does yours say? It says, um, "you're one of my oldest friends, and I love you" "But you're like a sister to me.
" Is there another cookie? Morning.
You want some coffee? Shh.
You're out of filters, so I used paper towels.
Also, you're out of paper towels.
Hey.
I need to talk to you on the roof now.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Are you serious? It's like 25 degrees outside.
You're right.
What the hell's wrong with you? I'm cold, for starters.
Could we have this conversation somewhere else, like, the boiler room Do you know what I was doing last night? Figuring out the coldest place in New York City to yell at me? You want to talk about cold? Lolly was in my room, crying, all night.
I didn't mean to hurt her.
I just She caught me by surprise.
I had no idea she felt that way.
I know that look.
Not even you believe what you're saying right now.
What look? How do you know my looks? I just do.
What do you want me to say? I don't have those feelings for her.
Then why did you kiss her? She kissed me.
Well, you didn't exactly push her away.
You're right.
That was a mistake.
It won't happen again.
This isn't just about the kiss.
I mean, do you know how hard it is when you have feelings for someone who's sleeping in the next room? Maybe you should just find someplace else to stay.
I know.
I looked at some places yesterday.
I'll be gone soon.
Great.
My Girl? Bleh! We heard it was a sweet movie.
I used to feel sad for Anna Chlumsky when Macaulay died, but she got off easy.
Eventually, he would have told her she was like a sister.
Then she'd wish she was the one stung to death by bees.
Did you seriously just ruin the movie for us? No.
Jamie Lee Curtis will ruin the movie for you.
Why is everyone so stupid? I love this new you.
Keep it up.
Hi.
Cash or credit? Are you okay? Zang.
Yeah.
That's what I thought.
So this is why we're gonna do everything you love to do today.
We're gonna have drinks and go shopping, have drinks and go ice skating, and we're gonna have drinks and go out drinking.
Lame! You want to know what I would do? First, I'd go downtown, see my favorite Tibetan Monk Cover band, Sister's Dream Hood, next, I'd go to this all-night laundry mat that hosts amazing vegan poetry slam.
Have you heard of little humus? Okay.
Enough.
Now I'm depressed.
I just want to stay here and work on my new list.
I am afraid to guess what that list is.
Observe the board.
Doomed relationships: She's a man, he's a fly, he has a really huge head, I'm like a sister.
We're all grotesque in our own ways.
Okay, Lolly, you are a lot of things, but Rocky Dennis is not one of them.
What is it gonna take for you to get out of this Kevin-funk? Let's have a party.
No.
What kind of party? Any kind of party you want.
My parents are out of town.
We can have it there.
Am I invited? Okay.
I'm in.
- Am I invited? - Whoo! Okay, I'll go get the place ready.
Okay.
Okay? I'll go call Paige.
- Okay.
- Am I invited? Whoo! I'm invited.
Hi.
Look who finally decided to show.
I'm ten minutes early.
Chester's just having his daily freak-out.
What's wrong? - Nothing.
- Everything! - Your viral marketing worked.
- What? There's even mention of it in Musto's column in The Voice.
"Stickers plastered around the city have New Yorkers wondering 'what's hot?'".
My God.
This is great, isn't it? It puts more pressure on us.
Everyone's talking about the stickers, but we need them talking about our magazine.
All of this is for nothing if people don't read it.
Nothing's gonna go wrong.
Okay? I talked to every newsstand and they all agreed to display the magazine right out front.
We've got all of our bases covered.
All I'm saying is that we shouldn't start celebrating just yet.
Would you relax, Chester? Nobody is celebrating.
Really? Care to explain this? It's pretty self-explanatory, I think.
I've been fax-viting everyone.
But mainly hot guys.
I didn't get one.
My God.
Does fax-viting become a thing in the future? Should I patent it? Yeah.
That's how you make your first million.
- Really? - No! Faxing is barely a thing in the future.
So mean.
Okay, when I said party, I was thinking, like, a couple friends, mellow You said I could have any kind of party I wanted.
Does 40-year-old Becca think that we should drink Chardonnay and play Pictionary and Sebastian, what's something boring you do? Listen to you and Becca talk.
Fine.
We'll do it your way.
Also known as the fun way.
Besides, my best friend is about to become a published writer.
I think that deserves a celebration A celebration full of hot guys.
Well, when you put it that way - Hey.
- Hey! Whoa, easy, Tyson.
You should never sneak up on a woman.
I didn't realize I was sneaking.
I tried calling you.
Did you get my message? Yeah, I've been busy.
How did Noelle like your stuff? As a matter of fact, she liked it a lot.
She invited me to a party tomorrow to mingle with the glitterati.
Lucky you.
Yeah, it's not really my thing.
I wish I could bring you as my wingman and you'd give me suggestions on how to act around those people.
Let's see, art people are very self-absorbed.
That should be easy enough for you.
Whoa.
What's that supposed to mean? Nothing.
Just have fun at your party, Sean.
I got to go.
As long as you think so.
That matters.
Hey.
Hey.
What are you doing? I thought you said you were staying.
Yeah, in the city.
Just not here.
Is this because of the fortune cookie? Because those things are rarely accurate.
Of course not.
I just felt like it was time that I got my own place.
I even talked to Becca about it.
Becca? What does she have to do with it? It's not her decision to make.
I know.
It's my decision.
This doesn't change anything between us.
This way, I'll be out of your hair.
But I like you in my hair.
It's for the best.
Trust me.
I'll call you tomorrow.
Yeah.
Did you tell Kevin to move out? I hated seeing you so upset.
I thought it'd be better for you if he wasn't here.
I really don't think you had any right to do that.
I was worried about you, Lolly.
I mean, you can't get over a guy who's sleeping on the couch.
He was sleeping on my floor! And if I wanted him gone, I'm a grownup, and I'm more than capable of telling him so.
Like now, for instance.
I no longer want to be in the same room as you.
Watch.
"Lolly, get out of here.
" "Fine, Lolly.
I will.
" See? I was just trying to help.
You know what? Kevin is my business.
So just please, just stay out of it.
What's up, Becs? Jesus.
Jamie.
What are you doing here? The same thing you are, stealing from mom and dad while they're away.
Um, I'm not stealing.
I'm having a party.
You look good.
When did you get back? About a week ago.
I know I probably should have called but Stan got me a job at his dad's company, and I'm working these crazy hours.
At least I get to pay for that extra semester.
Jamie, that's awesome.
My God.
I'm so glad you're home.
Yes.
Yeah, I don't know why you thought I was gonna be gone forever.
I take it mom and dad don't know that you're throwing a party here.
No, and you're not gonna tell them.
And I have to cheer Lolly up, and our place is depressingly small.
What's the matter with Lolly? Um It's about a dude.
It's okay.
What happened? To make a long story short, she likes someone who's not into her.
So she's upset.
And on top of it, she's mad at me.
What'd you do? Why do you assume it's my fault? Isn't it always? No, and don't you want to hear my side of the story? No, not really.
You know, you really should just be the bigger person and apologize.
Especially if she's sad, you know? It sucks getting rejected.
Okay, I don't know who this person is right now with a hair cut and a cranberry button-up and good advice.
Fine.
I'm gonna apologize.
Even though I was just trying to help.
You know, when I apologize to a girl, I usually get her flowers.
Do girls get flowers for each other? This is how an artist should live.
I thought artists were supposed to live in squalor.
Cut off their own ears.
Only those who weren't lucky enough to meet me.
Thank you.
Exhibit A.
Guy standing with all the admirers, that's Diego.
I discovered him.
This is his loft, and these are all his pieces.
Diego.
The place looks amazing.
This is Sean Reeves.
Thanks for letting me crash your party.
I admire your work.
Thanks.
Can you imagine, five years ago, I was posing nude for drawing classes just to make rent.
Now I only pose for fun.
You're too much.
He's ridiculous.
Do you think you're more talented than he is? You're right.
So just imagine what I can do for you.
This place is sweet.
I can't believe Becca's letting you have a party here.
Don't try to butter me up.
- Okay.
- I am still mad at her.
Got it.
'Tis the season! I'm so sorry, Loll.
I come offering an olive branch.
Or a pine.
Or whatever that thing is.
A fir? Froot Loops, Lucky Charms, Boo Berry? You shouldn't have.
I'm just saying that.
You absolutely should have.
And I'm so glad you did.
I'm sorry.
Will you forgive me? - I'm so sorry.
- You really hold a grudge.
Um, cereal tree.
Whoo! Drinks.
Yes.
For you.
- For you.
- Thank you.
Okay.
So let's make a pact.
We all kiss someone tonight.
Just to be safe, I brought a ton of mistletoe.
No excuses.
You have to kiss someone under the mistletoe.
Okay? Rules is rules.
- Fine.
- Cheers.
Cheers! This one isn't as bad as the others.
Looks like something you'd find in a dentist's office.
Are you an artist? Yeah.
Are your paintings being shown anywhere? Just the walls in my loft.
It's very exclusive.
You're in good company.
David Shea owns galleries all over the world.
He's done wonders for Diego, plucked him out of obscurity.
I thought Noelle discovered Diego.
I've never heard of her.
He likes them young.
Doesn't he? This party blows.
There's barely any girls here.
Nice to see you too, Sebastian.
This party's awesome.
There's barely any girls here.
Every guy is talking to me.
Excuse me.
See? Normally, I'd have to settle for someone like him.
I'm thinking it's a two-Zima kind of night.
God.
What a mess.
My parents are gonna kill me.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Are you having fun? - Yeah.
Making drinks for drunk frat boys.
Just like work.
Except I'm not getting paid.
Can I have one? Yes.
Thank you.
What is Kevin doing here? I invited him.
I'm nobody's sister.
Hey, why did you invite Kevin? Yeah, why did you invite Kevin? Why wouldn't I? Because the whole point of having this party is to help you get over him.
No.
The whole point of the party was to have fun, which I am having, to cut loose, which I think I'm doing a pretty good job of cutting.
And to have a good night with friends, which Kevin is.
Okay, as much as I love your dress, it doesn't really exactly scream "friends.
" There's plenty of other hot guys here.
But if Kevin happens to think I look hot, well, then I guess that just can't be helped.
Kevin! Hey! Hey.
When did you get here? I thought you saw me come in.
Yay! This is awesome.
- All my friends are here.
I'm so happy.
- Yay.
- Here, let me take that.
- Thanks.
Watch out.
My God, is this you? Yeah.
I thought I put all those away.
God, that's embarrassing.
You want to talk embarrassing, I actually had that same costume.
But I'm a boy, so Hey, I'm sorry if I was harsh the other morning.
I was just trying to protect Lolly.
I know.
She's lucky to have you.
No.
I'm the lucky one.
There's no one else like her.
Hey, are we cool? 'Cause I don't want you to think I'm, like, a bad guy.
What do you care what I think? We barely know each other.
I don't know.
I just do.
I know you're a good guy, Kevin.
'Tis the season to be Lolly.
Wow.
You clean up nice.
Structure.
You dirty up nice.
The limited.
Thanks for noticing.
It's kind of hard not to.
Yeah, you'd be surprised.
Is that the guy? Becca told me.
You know she can't keep her mouth shut.
Let me know if you want to make him jealous.
Is everything okay? Yeah.
Why wouldn't it be? I saw you arguing with David Shea.
I heard he was someone I should know.
He's not as great as everyone thinks.
But isn't that the reason you invited me here tonight, to meet people like that? I don't know why I invited you, because you've done nothing but complain since we walked in the door.
I thought I could help you.
Maybe I was wrong.
I shouldn't have brought you.
No, I shouldn't have come.
Sean, I-I'm sorry.
Hey! You guys are here.
I'm so glad you came.
Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Thanks for having us.
So am I.
- Hi, there.
- Out of bounds.
I thought Chester could use a drink.
And by Chester, I meant me, and by a drink, I meant three.
Did you call to double-check that the magazines will be dropped off? I did.
I even triple-checked.
Why? Was something wrong? No.
Everything's fine, Chester.
Triply fine.
I should check our messages.
Is there a phone? Kitchen.
Do you see why I needed a drink? Why doesn't he trust me? Well, he quit a great job at the New Yorker and put everything into the magazine, so if Thermal fails, so does he.
And he put you in charge of 1/3 of our inventory.
I mean, if that's not trust, I don't know what is.
Pardon me.
Hey, love guru.
What kind of collection is this? Lank's Hill '91? Never even heard of it.
Yeah, that's my dad's colonoscopy.
You ever watch it? Many, many times.
Just put it back.
Hey.
You know what they say about mistletoes, right? Mistletoe? It's one toe.
Keep moving.
Yes.
- No.
Nay.
- Nay? Lolly's gonna be upset if you break our pact.
Lolly's gonna be upset anyway.
What's going on with you and Kevin? - Me and Kevin? - Yeah.
Nothing.
Why would you ask me that? I have been working in bars for years.
Every night, I see people meeting, fighting, falling in love, sometimes all three at once.
I know the look when I see it.
No, I don't know what look you're talking about.
Honestly.
That look.
What? - That look.
- No.
That was not a look.
Okay.
Well, neither was the Whatever you think you saw between me and Kevin.
Okay.
Okay.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I hope you don't mind that I'm here.
I got a fax-vite from Lolly.
No, I don't mind.
I thought it'd be weird, but then I figured, "screw it, weird seems to be the norm for us these days.
" Well, we're even steven now, right? No, I just mean that we've both broken up with each other.
So it's a tie.
I don't think it works like that, but okay.
Well, it's nice that you're here.
Although I'm pretty sure it's not to see me.
I don't think she wants to speak to me.
You two fighting? I didn't think so, but women never tell men when they're fighting with them, so Well, you should always assume there's a fight going on, and you should always assume it's your fault.
Yeah.
No, for real, though, you should Just be the bigger person and apologize.
Yeah.
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas.
Good luck.
Yeah, the Dominican was fun, but you miss the little things like speaking English.
My God.
You are so funny! All right, let's tone it down a notch.
No guy's gonna believe that laugh is real.
What the hell is he saying? I've talked to him before, lots of times.
He's not that interesting.
Okay, he's pretty interesting.
All right, wait.
Gimme that.
He's coming.
Be cool.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Thanks for inviting me.
Hope that cab driver accepts chocolate coins, otherwise, he'll have to accept me running from the cab.
Wait.
You're leaving? But you just You just got here.
Yeah.
I got to get up really early and let the repairman in.
Basically everything at my new place is broken.
Mistletoe.
Who put that there? Well, I guess this means we have to kiss.
I mean, rules is rules.
See you later.
He really doesn't like me back.
Well, I love you, like a sister.
I hate you.
Victoria, let's go.
Hey hey, hey.
Where are you guys going? It's after midnight.
The magazine should be out already.
I've been trying for 20 minutes to get Victoria away from that hot Todd guy.
- Come on.
- Make sure he has my number.
Go.
Go.
Go.
Are you sure? - Go.
- Okay.
You know, I've had this drink, and it's really not worth the hangover.
You know, I'm kind of glad that creepy fisherman left.
Boring the hell out of everybody with his sea shanties.
Say something else mean about him.
He's an idiot.
He could have kissed the prettiest girl at the party, and He went home alone.
I don't see any mistletoe.
Maybe there's some in your room.
What are you doing out here? I needed to be alone.
Yeah, I used to come up here when I couldn't take any more of Becca's mum asking me what my plan was for when the art thing didn't work out.
It's a good hiding spot.
Obviously, not good enough.
Why are you so nasty to me? If you don't like my attitude, why don't you just run back to Noelle? If I wanted to be with Noelle, I'd still be drinking overpriced champagne and pretending that a blurry circle is a masterpiece, but I'm here.
Why? I sure as hell can't help you with your career.
Why do you care who I date, Paige? What difference does it make to you? Because I like you, you idiot.
This is why I don't let my guard down.
Because I always end up getting hurt.
I didn't know your guard was down.
How could you not know? Remember? I'm an idiot.
I can't deal with this.
I'm going back inside.
Wait, Paige.
I have something I have to tell you.
I like you too.
No! He said he'd put it right here.
I knew this would happen.
I should've done it myself.
Chester, relax, okay? I'm sure there's a good explanation.
Gus, what happened to the Thermal issues? You promised you'd put them out.
I did, and now they're gone.
What do you mean they're gone? Where did they go? You see, the way it works is, people come and take magazines and then they walk away.
Wait, you're saying that all the magazines were taken in 30 minutes? Not all of them.
I saved you one.
You should bring me more next time.
We should celebrate! My gosh! Whoa.
I didn't know this was a thing.
- It is.
- It isn't.
Wow.
Now that was some crazy-ass mistletoe.
Was I that bad? No.
Of course you weren't bad.
It's it shouldn't have happened.
I was feeling vulnerable.
And you you're such a great guy, but I Lolly, stop.
You don't need to give me the breakup speech again.
I know exactly what this was.
What was it? A Christmas miracle.
Jamie, I'm serious.
So am I.
Really, we're cool.
I'm gonna take a shower.
Hey, let me know next time you want to make someone jealous, all right? What is with guys kissing me on the forehead lately? Hey, it's Sean.
Thanks for letting your guard down and for telling me about it this time.
Talk to you soon.
Good morning.
Good morning.
How was your party? Did you get lucky? As a matter of fact, I did.
I'm so proud of you.
- Thank you.
- Yes.
Hey.
Nice, dude.
Yeah, the pharmacy's back open.
Our customers will be stoked.
Hey, listen, man, we really need to be careful with this.
I don't want my dad finding out and getting in any trouble.
Okay, McGruff.
You know, your dad's the reason you're in this spot in the first place.
Besides, who's more important, Lincoln or Benjamin? I'm sorry.
Great.
Now go be sorry somewhere else.
You know what? You don't understand.
Which part? The part about you lying to me about discovering Diego, or you using me to make your sugar daddy jealous? He's not my sugar daddy.
It's my actual daddy.
And I lied to you because I was trying to impress you.
I was arguing with my father because I thought that if I could convince him to see your stuff, he would admit that I actually have an eye for talent.
And he finally agreed to.
I don't know what to say.
Say you'll give me another chance? Invite me in to pick out some pieces to show him? Unless you have other plans.
Thought I might find you up here.
Where it's freezing cold.
What are you doing here? Still feel bad about the way things went down with Lolly.
Wish I felt the same way.
It would make everything so much easier.
Why are you telling me this? She likes you.
You don't like her.
What else is there to say? That there's someone else.
Do you believe in alternate universes? I- I don't know, maybe.
I don't, which is gonna make what I'm about to say sound insane.
Then don't say it.
I have to.
Ever since I met you, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you.
I know it sounds crazy.
I feel like I've known you my whole life.
Kevin, no, don't do this, please.
Don't do this.
I like you.
The way you look at me makes me think you like me too.
Maybe not the way you're looking at me now.
Say something.
I- I think you're right.
I think you sound crazy.
What are you doing? Something I've wanted to do since I first met you.
You shouldn't have done that.