I Hate My Teenage Daughter s01e09 Episode Script
Teenage Sixties
1 Hey, there is my beautiful girls.
Have you both celebrated the joy of living as much as I have today? - How was school? -Boring.
- Nightmare.
Wow.
You two have sucked the positive energy right out of me.
I donât even know why I do my daily affirmations.
You're strong, you're beautiful.
People value your opinion.
Ooh! That's why.
What's that? It's my checklist for Sophie and McKenzie's birthday party.
First thing on the check list.
Start making check list.
Check.
That first one always feels so good.
Yeah.
About that.
The girls are asking doing something different this year.
Oh, all right.
McKenzie can blow up the candles on her cake first.
You know Sophie, is a week older.
Confuse everybody but I'm flexible No, no, no, ok.
we want to do a theme party.
Ooooh! Oh! Why, I love that! How about We do a Hawaiian luau.
Or favorite movies star.
Or cowboys and cowgirls.
Or, or sports teams ? Or animals.
Honey.
Stop shouting out words like you're in a game show no one else is playing.
They already known what they want to do.
We want to have a Mad Men party.
You know, 60âs dresses and beehive hairdos.
And all the guys will wear skinny ties - and sharkskin suits.
- Yeah we'd served sidecars and Manhattans and dry Martini's with just a whisper of vermouth.
No.
We're having mocktails.
And how do you know so much about liquor? You are my mum.
Okay.
But a Mad Men party is a little more grown up that I was planing.
I mean, I was going to do.
.
a decorate your own cup cake table and I look up fun party's games for teens.
There is this one where you lather up a personâs head, with shaving cream and then everybody throw cheese puffs at it Why? Honey, don't be rude.
Why sweetie? Because it's hilarious.
You have cheese puffs where your hairs should be.
Mun, we're going to be fifteen.
We don't want a little kids party.
We want it to be really cool.
I know that's hard for you to think like that but please.
Let us help you grow.
Oooh, you know what? It's your birthday.
If this is what you guys want to do, then thatâs what weâll do.
Plus I get to make another a list.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
Come on.
Great.
What I'm suppose to do with six cans of shaving cream and an industrial size bags of cheese puffs? Iâve got no plans this weekend.
Put them in the trunk.
A Mad Men party! I'd love it.
I wish I had some of my grandfather old clothes.
Always wore a single breasted tailored suit.
Never went without a hat.
Men dressed with such dignity back then.
Yeah! My papa had some great suits from that era too.
My favorite was his wool tunic with the gold braids on the sleeves and the shiny buttons down the front.
Elevator operator.
Pre-civil rights sixties.
Good times.
Yeah, this party is making me a little sad.
Not long ago, Sophie was begging me for a sparkly tutu.
This morning, she was asking me about false eyelashes and boob tape.
Hey.
So the girlsâ birthday party is a little more mature this year.
But so are they.
It's still just dress up.
Dress up is fun.
Hu, hu; You sound like you may have a few interesting items stuck away in your closet.
If you ask me if I have a fedora Iâve been dying to wear, I wouldn't denied it Youâre still going to have the combination bouncy house super slide, right? No.
The girls didnât want it.
Dunk tank? Got to have a dunk tank.
Sorry, Gary.
I donât even know why weâre calling this a party.
Hey.
-Hey.
-Hey - Sophie told me about this party.
I think it's awesome.
You're going to dress up? Of course, I am.
I'm coming as a Perry Como sixties crooner.
Who's show up late to the party because he accidentally booked a gig at the fairgrounds on Saturday.
- Matt! - Ok, I'm out of here.
This arguments make me uncomfortable, and I have to decide which fedora I'm gonna wear.
That's right.
I have a costume trunk.
What, you're uncomfortable too? No, I like it.
That why I want to get a better view at the fear in Matt's eyes.
There, it is.
You know, it never fails.
You always manage to screw up Sophie's birthday party.
I think that a little unfair.
Is it? Either you don't show up, you show up late, or you bring some groupie you barely even know, correction two groupies because you forgot you invited both of them That was exciting.
Look, this is important to Sophie, so it better be important to you.
Just.
find a way to get there.
All right.
I'll do the best I can.
Do better.
Stop looking at my fear.
Hey mum.
This is kyle.
Huuummmm.
So this is kyle? The famous kyle.
See what you mean, Soph.
Muuum? What ? Mums weren't embarrassing in the sixties? I see you got your cup cake decorating table.
Yeah.
Sophie fought me on it but.
.
I won by not telling her I was going to do it.
Good evening Nikkie.
Oh, shoot.
What? You knew I was coming.
No, not that.
Your hat remind me I still owe money to that detective I hired to follow Gary.
Oh my god.
Annie, you look really beautiful.
If this was fifty year ago I'd sexually harass the hell out of you.
If this was fifty years ago,I'd have to take it.
You know what? I'm really glad, I let the girls talk me into this.
I guess Iâm not such a fuddy-duddy after all.
Your using the term fuddy-duddy isnât helping your case.
I canât wait for Sophie to see the gift I got her.
Laptop.
fully loaded.
Sheâs going to flip out.
Wow, Jack that's really nice of you.
You usually just get her something boring like that pretend money you always gave her.
Those are U.
S.
savings bonds I hope you'd be keeping those.
Calm down.
I keep them right next to the compass and the first aid kit you got her.
I know.
Iâm always the guy who gets her the practical gift.
And every time she opens it, all I hear is Thanks uncle Jack.
But this year in your face Sophie.
Daddy.
Hey.
Hey baby.
- Happy birthday - Thank you.
- Oops, you got lipstick on your .
- It's ok; don't worry.
about it.
Just go wash your face.
Daddy you're so funny.
I know, it's just hilarious how much I want you to wash your face.
Hey Gary.
So what do you think? Very nice.
I'm wearing twenty pounds of underwear and I'll got from you is very nice.
I'm sorry, I'm a little distracted.
I just saw MacKenzie.
I can't believe you let her out of the house looking like that.
Are you joking.
Compared to what she wears to school she looks like an Amish librarian.
And what about all that red lipstick? She looks like a floozy.
Gary.
It's a theme party.
Look, is the theme? Hi Daddy I'm a floozy.
Ok.
Maybe she looks more mature that we were used to, But it's her birthday party.
And she is having fun.
And don't say an another word about it or you'll embarrass her.
Nikkie.
You have an entire double eggs stuck to your right shoe.
Ha, ha, I wonder where that went.
So, you can put whatever color of icing you want to on it Then, there is candy pieces, sprinkles, chocolate chips and stuff that you could put on top.
Cupcake table is a big hit.
Of course it is.
You know, kids can dress up and act sophisticated all they want, but inside, they still just want cupcakes.
Yeaah.
Have you noticed who your clientele is? Hu.
You're right.
They do want your cupcakes.
You're crazy.
Just man the table for a few minutes.
I have to go get some extra icing from the fridge.
Not gonna lie.
This hurts.
Hey.
You want to get some punch.
I maybe later.
I kind of wanna see how this cupcake things pans out.
-Hey.
- Heeey, you made it.
Do you want to try some lime sugar punch, it's outrageous.
- No man, - why not? Cause I'm a dude.
Jack, you were right about the sugar punch.
Super youngsters.
Dad, you made it.
- I can't believe you dressed up -Yeah.
Jack forgot to lock his costume trunk.
Ay.
You're early.
Party only started ninety minutes ago.
He.
I busted my butt to get here.
Sophie is happy, I'm not going to be afraid of you tonight We'll see.
Where's your gift? You're looking at it.
Me, being here is a gift.
You'd better be joking.
Of course I'm joking.
That's why I'm laughing.
Not because, I'm afraid of you.
Hey, who's your friend? For god sake, Marshall stalk someone aged appropriate.
- Sup Mr Miller.
- Sup Omar.
What's on your mouth Omar All that red.
I don't know.
Nothing.
Wow, just got it too.
Greatness, Allah.
Let me tell you a little something about my daughter McKenzie.
She is the most precious thing in my life.
And I would do anything to protect her.
Anything.
To anyone.
Of any age.
You all feel me? Yes, sir.
Good, good.
Now, go wash your faces.
Why, do you guys hanging in here for? Partyâs outside.
Well, we'd rather stay here and help you, Mrs Cooper.
I'm fine, I've got this.
All right, go on outside.
Get! Oh, hi honey.
You're ok? I really wished you'd have check with me before you decided to wear that outfit.
Every boy in this party, including Kyle, keep staring at you.
This is inappropriate.
Hey, you know what? I didn't even want to dress up.
I wanted to get a six foot sub, and throw cheese puffs at people's heads.
but no.
You and MacKenzie wanted to be sophisticated.
Look, I'm asking you, nicely.
Go to your room and change it in something decent.
This is not fair.
- Well, no one ever said life was fair.
- This sucks.
- I heard that.
- Dude , I need you to help me out.
- No.
You don't even know what I'm asking.
You brought two groupies to the party, and you want me to run interference.
I told you never again.
God, I wish everybody would calm down about that.
It was five years ago.
I was very thoughtless back then.
I'm sorry.
What do you need.
I forget to get Sophie a present.
So, I need to sign up my name to your gift.
What? You didn't get your daughter a birthday present? Yeah, Jack, I got her four of them.
- Thatâs why Iâm asking to go halfsies on yours.
- No.
I'm not going to do that.
I've got a really good gift, a laptop.
I'm going to be the fun uncle this year.
No more boring.
practical gifts.
Unlike the pretend money you gave? Those are savings bonds.
Issued by the government.
what is wrong with you people? I don't understands why it's such a big deal.
I do favors for you all the time.
Like what? I gave you a ride to the airport.
That was in 1999.
You were so eager to get me out of the car you drove up with my suitcase.
I think the world you're looking for is thank you.
You are not.
boarding up in my gift.
I'm the fun uncle.
And that's that.
Yeah, well, your hat makes you look like uncle Ned I'm not the pervy uncle.
But mum.
If you don't dress up, everybody will think you're lame.
Exact words.
Dude, where's everyone.
.
Is this a dream? I tell you one thing.
Next year, she can through her own damn party.
And their sweet sixteen too.
Good luck Sophie.
And Iâll tell you something else.
When this party is over I am not making the favor to clean up.
I am done.
Hey, what do you guys.
.
Oh sweet lord! Mum! What's wrong with Sophie? Oh my god.
I knew it.
Floozy party.
Trust me boys this is more trouble than it's worth.
- Annie! - What? Hey.
McKenzie just told me she got a text from Omar.
He and Jesse left because you freak them out.
You damn right I did.
Those boys were making up with my daughter at her birthday party.
Let me ask you something.
Have you sat McKenzie down and torture her about how to conduct herself as a proper young lady? about having self respect.
Excuse me.
Are you questionning my mothering skills, Gary? - I'm just saying.
- Maybe I'm not perfect.
I have been known to do things, like accidentally season my pasta with bath salts.
But when it comes to raising McKenzie, that is what I do, it's my job and I'm damn good at it.
Oh really? And why then those boys have her red lipstick smeared all over their mouth? McKenzie, Honey come here for a second.
What's up.
Have you making up with boys? No.
McKenzie, I saw Omar and Jesse.
They both had your red lipstick all over their faces.
Omar and Jesse? Gross.
No, it wasn't my lipstick.
You're the only one wearing it.
So please explain to me how What's up guys? I'm sorry baby.
Daddy, let me ask you something.
If I had a beautiful diamond, A thing that I value and care about a lot.
You think I'd gave that to just anybody? No I don't.
And that's a very good way of putting it.
Yeah, I learned this from mum.
You're a very smart women.
Ah, I can't take all the credit.
My mother raised me to be a proper young lady.
Nikkie, You did a burlesque show for teenage boys.
Men, Gary.
Now they're men.
Hey.
Listen, Sophie is kind of having a rough time with her birthday party.
She probably appreciate a nice gift from her dad.
So if you want to put your name on my gift, That's ok.
I thought you wanted to be the fun uncle this year.
I know.
I still do.
The fun uncle is just extending a helping hand to the barely there dad.
Woow.
That's very generous of you.
But I got Sophie a present.
When? I made a call to a friend of mine who is roadie for Taylor Swift.
He got me two tickets for her show at Austin city limits.
Good for you man.
That a cute present.
It's no laptop but it's pretty darn good on short notice Thanks.
Oh, He also droped off this.
An electric guitar? He got Taylor to sign it on the back.
Come on! This make my laptop looks like a savings bond.
Just for future reference donât try to outfun the fun dad.
People love my hat.
I'd ask around.
Honey, what are you doing in here? I am the only one that can't go outside anymore.
Whatever.
Itâs fine.
Look, I know that's not the party you wanted And I know that you're upset.
I'm not upset.
Really? Cause I would be if my mum get everybody eyeful of her uppers and others.
I don't think that would ever happen.
Grandma wears a robe under her robe.
It's hard some times having a pretty mum.
- Sophie! - It's true.
It's weird seeing guys looking at you like that.
I even heard one of them talk about how sweet your setup is.
What? Who? Who was talking about how sweet my setup is? Marshall.
Honey.
Those boys have a lot of growing up to do.
And, Marshall should probably be tested.
Sophie, you're a beautiful girl.
And one day you're going to be a beautiful women.
You have to say that, you're my mum.
No.
It's not just me.
You think I donât see all those boys checking you out every day when I drop you off at school? Itâs not going to be long before theyâre all lining up outside that door.
And it sure as heck wonât be to see me.
There you are birthday girl.
Kyle is looking for you.
Really? Sophie.
Not so eager.
Let them come to you.
Yeah, mum.
Kyyyyle.
McKenzie listens to me.
Sophie thinks I'm pretty.
Can I interest you, ladies, in a refreshing mocktail? Go home, Marshall.
Oh my god, mun.
You were right.
This is a blast.
I told you.
You all need to trust me when it comes to good clean fun.
Why have I to go first? Everybody's taking a turn, right?
Have you both celebrated the joy of living as much as I have today? - How was school? -Boring.
- Nightmare.
Wow.
You two have sucked the positive energy right out of me.
I donât even know why I do my daily affirmations.
You're strong, you're beautiful.
People value your opinion.
Ooh! That's why.
What's that? It's my checklist for Sophie and McKenzie's birthday party.
First thing on the check list.
Start making check list.
Check.
That first one always feels so good.
Yeah.
About that.
The girls are asking doing something different this year.
Oh, all right.
McKenzie can blow up the candles on her cake first.
You know Sophie, is a week older.
Confuse everybody but I'm flexible No, no, no, ok.
we want to do a theme party.
Ooooh! Oh! Why, I love that! How about We do a Hawaiian luau.
Or favorite movies star.
Or cowboys and cowgirls.
Or, or sports teams ? Or animals.
Honey.
Stop shouting out words like you're in a game show no one else is playing.
They already known what they want to do.
We want to have a Mad Men party.
You know, 60âs dresses and beehive hairdos.
And all the guys will wear skinny ties - and sharkskin suits.
- Yeah we'd served sidecars and Manhattans and dry Martini's with just a whisper of vermouth.
No.
We're having mocktails.
And how do you know so much about liquor? You are my mum.
Okay.
But a Mad Men party is a little more grown up that I was planing.
I mean, I was going to do.
.
a decorate your own cup cake table and I look up fun party's games for teens.
There is this one where you lather up a personâs head, with shaving cream and then everybody throw cheese puffs at it Why? Honey, don't be rude.
Why sweetie? Because it's hilarious.
You have cheese puffs where your hairs should be.
Mun, we're going to be fifteen.
We don't want a little kids party.
We want it to be really cool.
I know that's hard for you to think like that but please.
Let us help you grow.
Oooh, you know what? It's your birthday.
If this is what you guys want to do, then thatâs what weâll do.
Plus I get to make another a list.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
Come on.
Great.
What I'm suppose to do with six cans of shaving cream and an industrial size bags of cheese puffs? Iâve got no plans this weekend.
Put them in the trunk.
A Mad Men party! I'd love it.
I wish I had some of my grandfather old clothes.
Always wore a single breasted tailored suit.
Never went without a hat.
Men dressed with such dignity back then.
Yeah! My papa had some great suits from that era too.
My favorite was his wool tunic with the gold braids on the sleeves and the shiny buttons down the front.
Elevator operator.
Pre-civil rights sixties.
Good times.
Yeah, this party is making me a little sad.
Not long ago, Sophie was begging me for a sparkly tutu.
This morning, she was asking me about false eyelashes and boob tape.
Hey.
So the girlsâ birthday party is a little more mature this year.
But so are they.
It's still just dress up.
Dress up is fun.
Hu, hu; You sound like you may have a few interesting items stuck away in your closet.
If you ask me if I have a fedora Iâve been dying to wear, I wouldn't denied it Youâre still going to have the combination bouncy house super slide, right? No.
The girls didnât want it.
Dunk tank? Got to have a dunk tank.
Sorry, Gary.
I donât even know why weâre calling this a party.
Hey.
-Hey.
-Hey - Sophie told me about this party.
I think it's awesome.
You're going to dress up? Of course, I am.
I'm coming as a Perry Como sixties crooner.
Who's show up late to the party because he accidentally booked a gig at the fairgrounds on Saturday.
- Matt! - Ok, I'm out of here.
This arguments make me uncomfortable, and I have to decide which fedora I'm gonna wear.
That's right.
I have a costume trunk.
What, you're uncomfortable too? No, I like it.
That why I want to get a better view at the fear in Matt's eyes.
There, it is.
You know, it never fails.
You always manage to screw up Sophie's birthday party.
I think that a little unfair.
Is it? Either you don't show up, you show up late, or you bring some groupie you barely even know, correction two groupies because you forgot you invited both of them That was exciting.
Look, this is important to Sophie, so it better be important to you.
Just.
find a way to get there.
All right.
I'll do the best I can.
Do better.
Stop looking at my fear.
Hey mum.
This is kyle.
Huuummmm.
So this is kyle? The famous kyle.
See what you mean, Soph.
Muuum? What ? Mums weren't embarrassing in the sixties? I see you got your cup cake decorating table.
Yeah.
Sophie fought me on it but.
.
I won by not telling her I was going to do it.
Good evening Nikkie.
Oh, shoot.
What? You knew I was coming.
No, not that.
Your hat remind me I still owe money to that detective I hired to follow Gary.
Oh my god.
Annie, you look really beautiful.
If this was fifty year ago I'd sexually harass the hell out of you.
If this was fifty years ago,I'd have to take it.
You know what? I'm really glad, I let the girls talk me into this.
I guess Iâm not such a fuddy-duddy after all.
Your using the term fuddy-duddy isnât helping your case.
I canât wait for Sophie to see the gift I got her.
Laptop.
fully loaded.
Sheâs going to flip out.
Wow, Jack that's really nice of you.
You usually just get her something boring like that pretend money you always gave her.
Those are U.
S.
savings bonds I hope you'd be keeping those.
Calm down.
I keep them right next to the compass and the first aid kit you got her.
I know.
Iâm always the guy who gets her the practical gift.
And every time she opens it, all I hear is Thanks uncle Jack.
But this year in your face Sophie.
Daddy.
Hey.
Hey baby.
- Happy birthday - Thank you.
- Oops, you got lipstick on your .
- It's ok; don't worry.
about it.
Just go wash your face.
Daddy you're so funny.
I know, it's just hilarious how much I want you to wash your face.
Hey Gary.
So what do you think? Very nice.
I'm wearing twenty pounds of underwear and I'll got from you is very nice.
I'm sorry, I'm a little distracted.
I just saw MacKenzie.
I can't believe you let her out of the house looking like that.
Are you joking.
Compared to what she wears to school she looks like an Amish librarian.
And what about all that red lipstick? She looks like a floozy.
Gary.
It's a theme party.
Look, is the theme? Hi Daddy I'm a floozy.
Ok.
Maybe she looks more mature that we were used to, But it's her birthday party.
And she is having fun.
And don't say an another word about it or you'll embarrass her.
Nikkie.
You have an entire double eggs stuck to your right shoe.
Ha, ha, I wonder where that went.
So, you can put whatever color of icing you want to on it Then, there is candy pieces, sprinkles, chocolate chips and stuff that you could put on top.
Cupcake table is a big hit.
Of course it is.
You know, kids can dress up and act sophisticated all they want, but inside, they still just want cupcakes.
Yeaah.
Have you noticed who your clientele is? Hu.
You're right.
They do want your cupcakes.
You're crazy.
Just man the table for a few minutes.
I have to go get some extra icing from the fridge.
Not gonna lie.
This hurts.
Hey.
You want to get some punch.
I maybe later.
I kind of wanna see how this cupcake things pans out.
-Hey.
- Heeey, you made it.
Do you want to try some lime sugar punch, it's outrageous.
- No man, - why not? Cause I'm a dude.
Jack, you were right about the sugar punch.
Super youngsters.
Dad, you made it.
- I can't believe you dressed up -Yeah.
Jack forgot to lock his costume trunk.
Ay.
You're early.
Party only started ninety minutes ago.
He.
I busted my butt to get here.
Sophie is happy, I'm not going to be afraid of you tonight We'll see.
Where's your gift? You're looking at it.
Me, being here is a gift.
You'd better be joking.
Of course I'm joking.
That's why I'm laughing.
Not because, I'm afraid of you.
Hey, who's your friend? For god sake, Marshall stalk someone aged appropriate.
- Sup Mr Miller.
- Sup Omar.
What's on your mouth Omar All that red.
I don't know.
Nothing.
Wow, just got it too.
Greatness, Allah.
Let me tell you a little something about my daughter McKenzie.
She is the most precious thing in my life.
And I would do anything to protect her.
Anything.
To anyone.
Of any age.
You all feel me? Yes, sir.
Good, good.
Now, go wash your faces.
Why, do you guys hanging in here for? Partyâs outside.
Well, we'd rather stay here and help you, Mrs Cooper.
I'm fine, I've got this.
All right, go on outside.
Get! Oh, hi honey.
You're ok? I really wished you'd have check with me before you decided to wear that outfit.
Every boy in this party, including Kyle, keep staring at you.
This is inappropriate.
Hey, you know what? I didn't even want to dress up.
I wanted to get a six foot sub, and throw cheese puffs at people's heads.
but no.
You and MacKenzie wanted to be sophisticated.
Look, I'm asking you, nicely.
Go to your room and change it in something decent.
This is not fair.
- Well, no one ever said life was fair.
- This sucks.
- I heard that.
- Dude , I need you to help me out.
- No.
You don't even know what I'm asking.
You brought two groupies to the party, and you want me to run interference.
I told you never again.
God, I wish everybody would calm down about that.
It was five years ago.
I was very thoughtless back then.
I'm sorry.
What do you need.
I forget to get Sophie a present.
So, I need to sign up my name to your gift.
What? You didn't get your daughter a birthday present? Yeah, Jack, I got her four of them.
- Thatâs why Iâm asking to go halfsies on yours.
- No.
I'm not going to do that.
I've got a really good gift, a laptop.
I'm going to be the fun uncle this year.
No more boring.
practical gifts.
Unlike the pretend money you gave? Those are savings bonds.
Issued by the government.
what is wrong with you people? I don't understands why it's such a big deal.
I do favors for you all the time.
Like what? I gave you a ride to the airport.
That was in 1999.
You were so eager to get me out of the car you drove up with my suitcase.
I think the world you're looking for is thank you.
You are not.
boarding up in my gift.
I'm the fun uncle.
And that's that.
Yeah, well, your hat makes you look like uncle Ned I'm not the pervy uncle.
But mum.
If you don't dress up, everybody will think you're lame.
Exact words.
Dude, where's everyone.
.
Is this a dream? I tell you one thing.
Next year, she can through her own damn party.
And their sweet sixteen too.
Good luck Sophie.
And Iâll tell you something else.
When this party is over I am not making the favor to clean up.
I am done.
Hey, what do you guys.
.
Oh sweet lord! Mum! What's wrong with Sophie? Oh my god.
I knew it.
Floozy party.
Trust me boys this is more trouble than it's worth.
- Annie! - What? Hey.
McKenzie just told me she got a text from Omar.
He and Jesse left because you freak them out.
You damn right I did.
Those boys were making up with my daughter at her birthday party.
Let me ask you something.
Have you sat McKenzie down and torture her about how to conduct herself as a proper young lady? about having self respect.
Excuse me.
Are you questionning my mothering skills, Gary? - I'm just saying.
- Maybe I'm not perfect.
I have been known to do things, like accidentally season my pasta with bath salts.
But when it comes to raising McKenzie, that is what I do, it's my job and I'm damn good at it.
Oh really? And why then those boys have her red lipstick smeared all over their mouth? McKenzie, Honey come here for a second.
What's up.
Have you making up with boys? No.
McKenzie, I saw Omar and Jesse.
They both had your red lipstick all over their faces.
Omar and Jesse? Gross.
No, it wasn't my lipstick.
You're the only one wearing it.
So please explain to me how What's up guys? I'm sorry baby.
Daddy, let me ask you something.
If I had a beautiful diamond, A thing that I value and care about a lot.
You think I'd gave that to just anybody? No I don't.
And that's a very good way of putting it.
Yeah, I learned this from mum.
You're a very smart women.
Ah, I can't take all the credit.
My mother raised me to be a proper young lady.
Nikkie, You did a burlesque show for teenage boys.
Men, Gary.
Now they're men.
Hey.
Listen, Sophie is kind of having a rough time with her birthday party.
She probably appreciate a nice gift from her dad.
So if you want to put your name on my gift, That's ok.
I thought you wanted to be the fun uncle this year.
I know.
I still do.
The fun uncle is just extending a helping hand to the barely there dad.
Woow.
That's very generous of you.
But I got Sophie a present.
When? I made a call to a friend of mine who is roadie for Taylor Swift.
He got me two tickets for her show at Austin city limits.
Good for you man.
That a cute present.
It's no laptop but it's pretty darn good on short notice Thanks.
Oh, He also droped off this.
An electric guitar? He got Taylor to sign it on the back.
Come on! This make my laptop looks like a savings bond.
Just for future reference donât try to outfun the fun dad.
People love my hat.
I'd ask around.
Honey, what are you doing in here? I am the only one that can't go outside anymore.
Whatever.
Itâs fine.
Look, I know that's not the party you wanted And I know that you're upset.
I'm not upset.
Really? Cause I would be if my mum get everybody eyeful of her uppers and others.
I don't think that would ever happen.
Grandma wears a robe under her robe.
It's hard some times having a pretty mum.
- Sophie! - It's true.
It's weird seeing guys looking at you like that.
I even heard one of them talk about how sweet your setup is.
What? Who? Who was talking about how sweet my setup is? Marshall.
Honey.
Those boys have a lot of growing up to do.
And, Marshall should probably be tested.
Sophie, you're a beautiful girl.
And one day you're going to be a beautiful women.
You have to say that, you're my mum.
No.
It's not just me.
You think I donât see all those boys checking you out every day when I drop you off at school? Itâs not going to be long before theyâre all lining up outside that door.
And it sure as heck wonât be to see me.
There you are birthday girl.
Kyle is looking for you.
Really? Sophie.
Not so eager.
Let them come to you.
Yeah, mum.
Kyyyyle.
McKenzie listens to me.
Sophie thinks I'm pretty.
Can I interest you, ladies, in a refreshing mocktail? Go home, Marshall.
Oh my god, mun.
You were right.
This is a blast.
I told you.
You all need to trust me when it comes to good clean fun.
Why have I to go first? Everybody's taking a turn, right?