Primos (2024) s01e09 Episode Script

1
[Opening theme music playing]
- [cat snarling]
- [dogs barking]
[singing] Hey! Another day
in my old hood ♪
Summer's starting
and it's gonna be so good ♪
Hey, oh, hey!
I was gonna be so cool ♪
Then you all moved in
and got me looking like a fool, again ♪
[Chorus] Oye, Primos ♪
Why you all up in my face ♪
[Chorus] Oye, Primos ♪
Get up of my space ♪
[Chorus] Oye, Primos ♪
You're wearing out my brain ♪
You're driving me insane ♪
Not the roll call again ♪
Cousin Bud, Nacho and Lita ♪
Tere, Tabi and Toñita ♪
Scooter, Lotlot and Gordita ♪
Nachito, ChaCha and Cookita ♪
- [Chorus] Yay ♪
- [Tater] No, come on ♪
[Chorus] Oye, Primos ♪
[Grunts in frustration]
[Tater reading]
[Suspenseful music playing]
[groans]
I can't take it anymore!
Why did Tater ask us to meet?
[Dramatic music plays
on recorder, stops]
What's with all the drama?
That's kind of our thing, Tater.
[Both] Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
That's Detective Tater to you!
You may be wondering
why I've gathered you all here today.
I was! Wow!
She's incredible at detecting!
Lotlot and I discovered
a family mystery.
Heads will be spun!
Revelations will be revelated!
For tonight,
I shall reveal the existence of
The 13th Primo!
[Thunderclap]
[Dramatic music plays
on recorder, stops]
[all gasp]
What bizarre numeric system
are you using?
Including you, Nellie and Baby Bud.
There are 15 of us.
Thirteen's my lucky number.
Never you mind the maths!
There's a mystery to be solved!
I call these crumpets chompets.
Careful, they bite back.
[Rumbling]
[sighs exasperatedly] I've got so much
junk, the ceiling is giving away.
Maybe it's time
to throw some things out.
[Eerie whispering]
[gasps] Spooky closet.
- Tater and I will help out.
- What?
We come to Buela's
to get away from chores!
[Groans, speaks Spanish]
Ay, mi rodilla.
[Sighs]
[in English] Fine.
- Trash. Keep.
- [Objects clatter]
Yuck! Clearly, this is trash!
Hmm. Hmm
[Groaning]
Ugh! It's a keep!
Aww, no skeletons.
Lotlot sad.
Skeletons in the closet
is just a figure of speech!
Ugh!
What is with these people?
Hmm?
Junk slide!
Mysterious box!
[Both groaning]
Hey, who's this music kid?
Huh, wonder what their name is.
I'm calling it Dwindelin.
What? No! Look.
The kid in these pictures.
Are we related?
Maybe. Buela and Pop
are in a lot of these.
Then why hide them here?
Tater, this is evidence of a cover up
for a devious crime!
Whoa there!
Is it leg day, Lotlot,
cause that's a pretty big leap.
Think! You've never seen
this kid before,
but Buela and Pop
care enough about them
to hide all this stuff away.
[Sniffs]
Something smells fishy.
That's because
Buela's cooking fish soup.
Besides, there's no evidence
of foul play.
But I do detect
[Gasps] a mystery!
And we're going to solve it?
Elementary, my dear Lotlotson.
The game is afoot!
[Both laugh]
All right, Buela, where's the body?
The fish body?
No! Now we're not accusing
anyone of anything.
But clearly you'd have info
about this kid.
[Speaks Spanish]
[in English] Is extra fishy?
No! Buela, eww!
This is a mystery!
And as a future investigatator,
I aim to solve it!
Answers, por favor!
[Shushes, speaks Spanish]
No más preguntas.
[In English]
And don't bother your abuelo either,
or I'll make you pluck
his nose hairs!
Sick! I'll get my tweezers.
We're not doing that.
Buela must be hiding something.
And I'm gonna get me some answers.
Oh, hey, Primas.
[Speaks Spanish] Qué onda?
[In English] Can you
identify this victim?
[Clears throat]
We think this kid is a Primo,
one we never heard about.
All we know is they were
some kind of musician.
See the trumpet?
Oh, that's a French horn
for an orchestra.
Oh, la, la!
Le French horn!
An orchestra, eh?
They must have played
fancy classical music!
[Blows raspberry]
Classical music's kind of boring.
It's got nothing on death metal.
[Playing electric guitar]
Whoa!
Anyway Lo siento.
[In English]
I don't know that kid.
Well, let's try the other Primos.
Oh, wait up!
You need a bad cop?
You'll hang out with us?
Maybe I will.
Maybe I won't.
Who's asking?
[Both giggle excitedly]
- T-sisters!
- [Exclaims]
You know all the goss in this joint,
past and present.
You know anything about this pic?
[Stuttering]
- I don't
- You do recognize this kid!
No. [stuttering]
I don't know who this is.
Give us your dark knowledge.
Yeah, Tabi, you're gonna squeal.
All right, that's enough!
You come barging in here
and ruin Tabi's flawless makeup?
[Crying]
I was flawless.
Just go! You've done enough.
[Sighs] Dames, am I right?
[Tater grunting]
If you'd just have a look
at this photo!
Sorry, little Tater Bird.
But I need to focus
on my plant fam right now.
We'll leave you alone,
once you tell us
you don't know anything.
I don't remember much.
I'm all about living
in the present, you know.
Oh, speaking of presents,
want some mulch?
It's extra juicy.
[Both exclaim and scream]
One for the road.
- [Blender whirring]
- [Tense music playing]
- [whirring intensifies]
- Uhm, uh, speak up, small fry.
Nowhere to hide, Big Nacho.
Oh, no. I can't hear you
through my muscles.
Gotta go!
Ugh! They all clearly know something.
Why not tell us?
Maybe I'm not cut out to be
a hard-boiled gumshoe gal.
Forget it, doll face.
This kid's not worth anyone's time.
[Speaks Spanish] Déjalo ser.
[In English] It's just sad
that this talented kid
is going to be forgotten.
Not everyone wants
to be remembered, Tater.
Besides, you barely know this kid.
- I gotta go.
- Hmm.
Lady Dwindelin,
you look so dashing in a cape.
Shall we abscond together?
Hmm.
[Gasps]
That gnome used to be
in Buela's yard!
Why was the Lady Dwindelin moved?
Curious-er
and curious-er.
[Thunder rumbling]
We've buried a lot of bodies
at my dad's funeral parlor.
But I've never exhumed one!
[Both gasp]
Holy smokes!
Ha! I knew it! It's a body!
Let's crack this bad boy open.
[Both gasp]
It's time for the grand reveal!
[Thunderclap]
[all gasp]
- So, spit it already!
- Who's the kid?
The 13th Primo
Is Lita!
[All gasp]
What? How?
How did I unravel this tangled
sweat of secrets? Simple.
I just found the thread
and pulled.
Lita's guitar case
has the exact same fringe,
and our next clue
[Plays electric guitar]
[French horn playing over recorder]
[all gasp]
It's the same melody, but classical.
Lastly, you inserted yourself
into the investigation.
A classic perp trick
to cover your tracks.
You you got me.
It's me.
[All] Wow!
If you play the French horn,
does that mean you speak French?
You just got more incredible!
- [Clamoring]
- Uh uh
Huh? Lita?
- Did I upset her?
- [Sighs]
Tabi, Big Nacho
and I knew about this.
We should have tried to stop you.
What happened?
Why is she bummed?
Lita used to love classical music
until the incident.
- [Discordant note]
- [groans]
[groans, grunts]
Some jerk uploaded it online.
That was the last time Lita
ever played the French horn.
She was so ashamed.
She literally buried
her old life as a band geek
and made us promise
never to talk about it.
And no one breaks
a Primo promise or I break them!
What have I done?
This isn't a funeral,
but I feel like we should say something.
[Sighs]
I should have checked with Lita
before my grand reveal.
But I got caught up
in the mystery.
[Classical French horn music playing]
Lotlot, cut it out the mood music.
I'm being serious.
- Look!
- Huh?
[Birds chirping]
[all cheering]
I finally finished my solo.
And it was the most beautiful
thing I've ever heard!
Lita, I'm so sorry
for revealing your secret.
[Lita] It's okay, Prima.
You got nothing to be sorry for.
I can't believe I've been
letting embarrassment
keep me from the thing that got me
to love music in the first place.
And you're so good at it.
You've overcome your fear, Leets.
- We're so proud of you.
- Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
What kind of rock star would I be
if I fell apart after each bad gig?
Thanks for keeping
the Primo promise, y'all.
It was eating me alive!
And thank you Primas
for helping me see the light.
Well, Lotlotson, onto our next case!
To find the dastardly villain
who leaked Lita's video.
[All cheering]
We're going to make 'em pay!
[Tater reading]
[Big Nacho] And that's why
for Buela's birthday,
we should bring her blending game
into the 21st century.
Thank you.
Incredible! Great idea!
[All] Hmm.
Boo!
Well, I haven't heard
any better ideas.
Maybe that's because your most
creative Primo hasn't spoken yet.
[Announcer] Welcome
to Operation Warm 'N Fuzzy.
We all know Buela loves
a homemade gift from her grandkids.
We've hit all the classics.
Coupons for hugs, coffee mugs,
and more keychains
than Buela has keys.
[All speaking indistinctly]
So how about something Buela
actually needs.
An upgrade to one of her
beloved possessions.
Is that a fishing net?
This is her blanket.
[All gasp]
[gasps]
That's right. The perfect gift
is a new quilt made by us.
For example.
[All exclaiming]
Pretty cool, huh?
I've already prepped 15 squares,
one for each of us to decorate.
All righty, quilters,
let's get quilting!
[Indistinct chatter]
This quilt idea certainly
has mass appeal.
But how may I contribute?
Did I not use big enough
words for you?
Everyone decorates a square!
Hmm, yes.
But I don't do arts and or crafts.
[Gasps] You don't wanna help
make Buela's gift?
[Sighs] Indeed.
Buela is my favorite elder.
In truth, my favorite human.
Come on, Gordita,
it's just a little art.
Exactly. Art.
It serves no actual purpose.
- What?
- [Dramatic music playing]
No purpose?
Don't let Bibi hear you
talk about art that way!
Wait, that's it!
Mom will show you the way!
[Humming]
Hmm?
We have an art emergency!
Oh, well, you came
to the right art teacher. ¿Qué pasó?
Is there a paint shortage?
Out of googly eyes?
Need some happy little trees?
Worse! WIth Buela's
birthday coming up
- [Gasps]
- [Buela's murmuring echoes]
[exclaims in Spanish]
Hijole.
[In English]
Yes, Buela' birthday, which is
- Tomorrow?
- [Laughs nervously]
Yes! Tomorrow, of course,
just like every year.
I'd love to help.
What was it again?
Help Gordita understand art.
Yes, that! But, oops!
I'm actually busy with, uh
Taking garage possum in for his shots!
Lots to do! Gotta run!
I guess it's all up to me.
Grab your inhaler, Gordita.
We're going on an art walk!
[Pleasant music playing]
[horse snorts]
Hmm.
[Horse snorts]
Hmm.
[Horse snorts]
[growls]
[horse neighs]
Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh?
[Horse neighs]
Ha?
Oh! Oh
Ha?
Hmm.
Mmm-mmm.
[Exclaims]
How did we forget
Mom's birthday again?
Ignacio, you were supposed
to remind me!
Gustavo was supposed
to remind me!
Every year?
Hopefully, this will be enough.
Ivan, how are we on the card?
I've narrowed it down to these two.
Oh, Ivan.
It's a good thing you're pretty.
Oh, Chacha.
[Humming]
Okay. my art walk
was more of an art wash.
Maybe taking a look
at some well eccentric art
will inspire you!
Are those candy wrappers?
Yeah. I wanted
to make a collage
about how Buela took me
trick or treating last year.
She made my dinosaur costume
because she's a clever girl.
[Sobbing]
That's beautiful, man.
Hmm.
[Gasps]
Love the crown!
Abuela is a queen.
A self-care queen.
She taught us everything we know.
Hmm.
Hey, Lotlot,
what are you doing there?
Oh, my goodness!
[Announcer] We now return
to El Martir vs Los Monstruos.
[Both laughing]
[sighs] Buela appreciates
spooky stuff too.
Well, that square
is totally working then
because it's definitely
gonna give me nightmares.
Excellent.
Great job. Keep going.
Hmm.
Okay, Gordita, you've got
to be inspired by now.
Let's make some art.
Hmm. Negative.
According to my observations,
art appears to be just repurposed trash.
The understanding of artistic
expression continues to elude me
and now I'm going
to disappoint Buela.
Mm.
Furthermore,
this situation has triggered
a physical reaction in my eyes.
Hmm. Certainly a day of firsts.
I'm sorry, Gordita.
I don't always understand you,
but I totally get
how you feel about Buela.
I won't let you let her down.
[Whistles]
[Upbeat music playing]
[grunting]
[grunting]
It is time.
And just for good measure,
buckle up for a Buela blast!
A Buela blast?
[Tater]
How about a little bit of Buela's
leftover pozole to help jog your memory?
[Sniffs]
Ah, an olfactory trigger
- And a little of Buela's favorite music.
- [Instrumental music plays]
- And her distinct old lady perfume.
- [Coughs]
- Migraine inducing.
- Look at the photos!
Now, close your eyes.
What do you see?
An infinite void.
Keep trying.
Mm. Mm.
Tater?
Hello, Gordita,
welcome to your brain.
Hmm. Might as well take
some observations.
Heart rate, 70 bpm.
Oxygen levels, optimal.
Cortisol levels, rising.
Concentration, waning.
Can someone please turn down
that dissonant racket?
[Speaking Spanish]
Hola, niña.
Un abrazo muy fuerte para ti.
[Buela speaking Spanish]
Hola, mis amores.
I've got enough crosswords, para todos.
[All, in English] Aww!
No way, Buela!
Bueno, a ver, a ver
What is a three-letter palabra
para un flightless bird?
[Both shrug]
E E
- Emu.
- It fits.
Bravo! Okay, mi jita.
A seven letter word for
[Gordita]
What is this feeling?
I'm awake!
Bleh! Why is my face wet?
Wait, it's morning!
And it's Buela's birthday!
And you still don't know
the point of art!
Calm yourself, Tater. Hmm.
Just a theory but
I think I understand.
[Upbeat music playing]
[all cheering]
Okay, if we use one of the kid's
old Easter baskets,
it won't look like we got everything
from the grocery store.
But we did get everything
from the grocery store.
Not today, Ivan!
Time for the only thing
better than cake.
Presents!
[All gasp]
[Buela speaking Spanish] Que linda.
Una colcha preciosa, qué bonita.
[In English]
Boo-yah, blanket!
Everyone made a square, Buela.
But it was my idea.
[Buela] Ay, Nellie,
So cute.
Lita, mija, it's our song!
Aww, muy bien, Chacha.
[Speaks indistinctly]
[Buela]
And this must be Gordita's.
Oh
[Speaking Spanish]
Mijita linda, me encanta.
Muchísimas gracias, mis chamacos.
[In English]
Ay, this is the best present ever!
[Speaking Spanish]
Y ahora es el turno de tus padres.
[In English] Your parents.
Wait. Where did they go?
- [Shouting indistinctly]
- [honking]
I knew we should have
given her our gift first!
- Where are we going?
- We're driving to Mexico!
We can start new lives.
Happy little lives.
[Chuckles]
[screaming]
Top down mid-December
On the highway ♪
Sunshine, hair flying
Radio playing ♪
Rise early, tide's high
Head for the waves ♪
Three, six, five
Friday to Friday ♪
So, if you want
To vibe with us ♪
If you want
To vibe with us ♪
Then come on
Take a ride with us ♪
It's the city of angels ♪