Saved by the Bell (2020) s01e09 Episode Script

[upbeat music]
- Hey buddy,
I wanted to cheer you up,
so I got you a gift.
- Oh, wow.
It looks just like the one
my abuela got me
that I lost.
- It is that one.
I stole it a few weeks ago
to get your fingerprints
for this identity theft
thing I was doing.
- Thanks?
But I don't need cheering up.
I spent all weekend
trying to figure out
how the Douglas kids
can stay at Bayside,
and I think I got some
pretty interesting ideas.
- "Lock front door of Douglas,
hide key in piggy bank."
- Okay, some are better
than others.
I also started a petition
and I left a message
for someone named Roberta
at the Department of Education.
I just figured
in the last few months
I've managed to change things
at Bayside,
so who's to say
I can't change the world?
- You're right you've had
a huge impact here.
I couldn't even imagine if you
never came to this school.
[brakes screech]
- Uh-oh. Miss Mandrake,
I didn't do my homework.
- Homework?
- We haven't had homework
since you outlawed it,
o, wise leader.
[cheers and applause]
- Oh, yeah, I forgot.
And look at what else I did.
- Hey, Matt,
I'm your Bayside Buddy.
I just transferred here
from Make Out High.
Want to break into
Toddman's car and study?
- Duh.
Ha ha.
What's that?
We're having
dyno nuggets for lunch?
[applause]
I'm going to live forever.
I'm so sorry.
I did not think
that fantasy sequence
about life without you
would be so dope.
- It's okay.
[record scratch]
[school bell rings]
- When I wake up
in the mornin'
Alarm gives out a warnin'
I don't think
I'll ever make it on time
[school bell ringing]
By the time I
grab my books
And I give myself a look
I'm at the corner
just in time
It's all right,
it's all right
Saved by the bell,
it's all right
It's all right,
saved by the bell
It's all right
'Cause I'm saved
by the bell
[school bell ringing]
- I am so pissed about the kids
being forced out.
Not just the cool ones
who play sports--
even the little nerds.
- The PTA thinks
it's such a great idea
to reopen, Douglas,
why don't they send their
own kids there first?
- Right.
- Look, I hate
that this is happening,
but Douglas
was seriously underfunded.
If the PTA raised enough money
to make it
a fancy charter school,
well, maybe everything
will be better.
- So you're hoping that
throwing a bunch of money
at a school over a weekend
will fix decades of systemic
inequality and neglect?
- I'm hoping
And
I'm also going to
check it out myself today.
Make sure it's good enough
for our kids.
- And if it's not?
- Well, I'm going
to fight for them.
Even if it means
standing up to you know who.
- Jade?
- Where?!
I mean, where?
Pfft.
I mean, I'll be fine.
- Yeah, because I'm going
with you, to Douglas.
I want to make sure
they actually fix things
before they send us back.
- DeVante, you've got class.
- I'm walking to your car now.
- Ooh, shotgun.
I mean, I'm driving.
I mean, can I drive?
Is that okay?
- Hey, Jamie.
How are you holding up?
- I'm hanging in there.
- What the hell? I'm not dead.
- No, but you're leaving.
What am I supposed to do?
Text you? Call you?
Hang out after school
and on the weekends
because we're kids
and we have no obligations?
- Yeah. And I'm still here
for another six weeks.
- Come on,
there's got to be a way
you can stay at Bayside.
What if you move
to the Palisades?
There's a house for sale
in my neighborhood.
The floorplan
is kind of claustrophobic,
but I know a great contractor.
- I can't afford a house.
I can't afford Spotify
without commercials.
- Well, what if you just say
live at my house?
- No, that's illegal.
Please just chill.
- I can't chill.
My resting body temp is 102.
I'm like a Labrador.
I go to class
but I will miss you.
- Bro, I cannot with Jamie.
Why is everybody tripping?
It's not that big of a deal.
- It isn't?
'Cause last time I checked,
you love it here.
You're the quarterback
of the football team,
and you're so popular,
the Bayside "Bugle"
has a weekly feature called,
"Aisha, she's just like us."
- Okay, obviously,
I'd rather stay,
but it's out of our hands.
They sent us here, and now
they're sending us back.
- Oh, that's a helpful
attitude.
Let's just all give up,
kick back,
and light a fat doobie
in Toddman's office.
Who cares?
- No, Daisy, don't give up.
If you smoke a fat doobie
in Toddman's office,
you'll be expelled.
Also, that's a really
uncool way to describe
that [indistinct] herb.
- I'm not giving up.
It was a joke.
- Oh, okay.
Awesome, cool and don't care
either way.
- Anyway, I'm off to City Hall.
Ever heard of
the William's Uniform
Complaint Procedures form
for educational code
section 35186?
- Would you believe no?
- Well, it's our golden ticket
out of this mess.
According to Roberta
at the California Department
of Education,
if you file this form
within 60 days of a charter
application approval,
it triggers an investigation
of the said institution.
- I know this is really
important, but I'm so bored.
- I thought
the 60 days had passed,
but turns out today
is the last day.
- Whoa, that's spooky.
- Not spooky.
I lit hella candles
at church this weekend.
- Makes sense.
- All I have to do is get down
to City Hall and file
this bad boy by 3:00 p.m.,
and Douglas 2.0
becomes Douglas two point no.
- Did you just think of that?
- No.
I thought of it last night
and wrote it down on my hand.
- Calories don't count
on your birthday
Ohh--uhh!
OHno!
- That was undeniably
hilarious.
- I know, and I hate Spencer.
But nothing
seems funny anymore.
- Right?
I've been in an Uptown Funk
ever since I found out Daisy
and everybody's leaving.
But why?
Nothing bad is happening to me.
- It's called empathy, Mac.
I have it too now.
- Empathy.
Did I get it from you?
Did we
I mean I would.
- Yeah, of course, anytime,
anywhere, but no.
I think it's because
when you spend time with people
who are different from you,
you start to see the world
through their eyes.
And once you opened your heart,
you can't close it again.
- Like a Capri Sun or Yoo-hoo.
No, those have caps.
Like a Capri Sun.
- Yes.
And much like that metaphor,
it sucks.
We're going to keep feeling
like this
unless we do something to help.
- Can anyone help me?
- You're like the world's
worst person.
- No, bro, shut up!
- Santa Monica freeway--more
like Santa Monica parking lot.
[chuckles]
[rock music on radio]
Well, at least
if you're at Douglas,
you won't have to sit
in this every day.
- That's true.
I mean, on one hand,
I'm being forced to leave
all of my new friends
in the school where I was
really starting to thrive.
But on the other, I will
be avoiding some traffic.
- Hey, you hungry?
We could stop at McDonald's,
get a Fillet-O-Fish.
- Nah.
- Do you not like
Fillet-O-Fish?
Because I have
a buy-one-get-one coupon
for Fillet-O-Fish.
If you'd rather have a burger,
well, then you can just
put some ketchup on it.
Tastes almost the same.
- Did you mean what you said?
That you'll fight for us?
- Of course.
Look, when you kids
came to Bayside,
you became my students.
It's my job to fight for you.
- [laughs] Sure.
- What?
- I mean, you didn't.
When Taylor's mom was
trying to get me expelled,
you were all like,
"Okay, okay, let's put a pin
in this and circle
back in the morning."
- Thatisuncanny.
You are
an excellent impressionist.
Can you do Jessie?
I did not do enough
to protect you.
And I am sorry,
but I am telling you,
if it's bad
when we get there,
I am not going to roll over.
I'm gonna fight.
You have my word.
[construction noises]
- It looksnice.
- I know, right?
- Jade.
- Hello, Ron, DeVante.
What a pleasant surprise.
Let me show you around,
Douglas 2.0.
- Hello, I need to submit
the Williams Uniform Complaint
Procedures form for educational
code section 35186.
- Everything seems to be
an order here.
- Wow. So that's it.
This makes it official.
- I don't work here.
I'm just a pervert
with a stamp fetish.
You got to get line over there.
- There's no way I'm getting to
the front of the line in time.
- No, there's no way
we're getting to
the front of the line in time.
- He means we're here to help.
- So why are we here?
What's the plan?
- I don't know guys,
it sounds hard.
Maybe we should give up.
- I haven't said the plan yet.
Okay, this place closes
at 3:00 p.m.
The only way we're going
to make it up there in time
is if we can convince
all these people
to let us go ahead of them.
- I'm amazing
at cutting in line.
Step aside, Daisy,
I got this.
And that is how it's done.
Whoa, blast from the past.
I haven't seen you
sinceArizona State!
Dave, right?
Have you done
something different
with your face or body?
- My name is Kevin.
Do I know you?
- Oh, no, remember?
That was our little
inside jokeyeah, 'cause
I actually called you Dave
at that party.
Whose party was it?
It was like that guy
was always drinking
all those beers
at Arizona State with us.
- Oh, yeah. You mean Ricky?
- Yes. How's he doing?
- You know, married,
three kids, divorced,
three more kids missing,
the usual.
What about you?
Tell me everything.
- Excuse me, would you be
willing to let us cut you
in line in exchange for
a pair of U2 tickets?
- No, thank you.
- Plus backstage passes
to meet Bono.
You know,
he wrote "A Beautiful Day"
about a day
he spent with my dad.
- The answer is still no.
- Would you do it
for 5 bucks?
- Ha. Deal.
- If you had one chance
to change the world--
- Honestly, if you just
stop talking to me,
I'll let you cut in front.
- Okay.
- [quietly] 'Scuse me.
Great.
Now we only got to do
that a billion more times.
- So there is going to be
a computer lab over here,
a meditation studio
over there.
And that is the new theater.
- Hold up, a theater?
I mean pssh, it's chill.
Right? You know, zip zap zop
or whatever.
- Got to say,
this place looks great.
- T-man, is that you?
- D-man, you old son
of a biscuit?
I haven't seen you
since Principal Con 2010.
- The wildest weekend Omaha's
ever seen.
You still remember
the principal shake?
- [chanting] Hey, hey, hey,
what is going on here?
- You got time to holler
at your boy?
- DeVante, is it okay?
- Sure, Mr. T, it's cool.
We can continue the tour.
Just one second.
And recording.
- Oh--
- Why don't you go ahead
and show me
the squash courts?
- I got your text.
What's going on?
- So, I thought about
what you said,
how I needed to be more chill.
And I thought what better way
to be chill
than to chill together
for the rest of our lives.
- No, no, no, no.
- Come on out, boys.
[upbeat music]
- No, boys, go back in.
- Aisha, you are the girl
that I never had
And I want to get to
know you better
Aisha, you know
I want you so bad
I guess there's nothing
anyone can do
To keep me away from you
- Aisha, this has been
the best month
and a half
or whatever of my life.
Will you make me the happiest
dude in homeroom
and marry me?
- No, this is insane. Get up.
- It's not that insane.
I mean, I love you.
And if we were married,
we'd have the same address
and you could stay at Bayside.
I thought
that's what you wanted.
- I do, but--
- She said "I do"!
- No, I don't.
I'm tired of people
making decisions for me.
I didn't decide to come here,
and I didn't decide to leave.
And now you're just deciding
that we should get married.
- I know this is crazy,
but we have to do something.
- No. I have to do something.
- Was it the dance?
- Oh, no Colt,
you guys were flawless,
really.
- I'm done being chill.
I'm ready to fight.
- Oh, just don't hit the face.
- No.
I mean, I don't want
to get sent back to Douglas.
- Well, I don't want
that either.
You're my star quarterback.
- Well, there has to be
something that you can do.
What about an athletic transfer
or a popularity scholarship?
I mean,
everybody do love Aisha.
- They do, and I thought about
an athletic transfer,
but problem is
football season's over.
It's impossible.
- We've been doing impossible
things all season, Coach,
and I'm not leaving this office
until we have a plan.
- Okay.
Aisha, you know, I'm really
proud of you, you come such a--
- Less crying more thinking.
- You got it.
- We made it, and with one
whole minute to spare.
- Cool.
So, take a quick five?
I'm kind of an introvert.
I recharge by being alone.
- Oh, my God, it's you, Dean
from the coffee shop, right?
- I don't know who that is
or what that is.
My name is Jean.
- Are you sure?
You look exactly the same.
- Am I sure I'm me
and not another man?
Yes, I'm sure.
- Okay, we're getting
sidetracked here.
Point is, Jean,
I need to file these forms.
- It's 3:00 p.m.
We closed.
- But I was here at 2:59.
We had already started talking.
- The form was not in my hand.
- Come on, bro.
We just cut all these people
in line just to get to you.
- Save it, Mac, he's just
using what little power he has
for his own sick enjoyment.
Like a flight attendant
who tells jokes on the PA.
- You think I enjoy this?
Do you realize how many people
come in here already mad at me
before we even start
our conversation?
Then when I'm done,
I got to take the bus
all the way across town
to my other miserable job
at the copy shop.
- That's what I said!
- No, I said coffee shop.
All so I can make enough
money to feed my family.
- Oh, wow.
I feel so much empathy for him.
- Daisy, why are you accosting
this poor man?
See the world through his eyes.
- Stop having empathy
for the wrong person.
Sir, please, my whole future
depends on this form.
And not just my future--
- Listen, your whole girl
changing the world routine
isn't going to work this time.
- This time?
I knew it was you.
- Nope. Still not me.
- So, you ever think about
that nympho Denny's waitress
we met back in Omaha?
[laughter]
- I remember her.
Whoo!
[both laughing]
She actually, uh,
became my wife.
Listen, I have
a question for you.
How do you feel about
all this new Douglas stuff?
I mean, is it really
as good as it looks?
- Is it as good as it looks?
Of course not.
But is it at least a step
in the right direction?
Also, no.
- Wait, what?
- Oh, you really don't know.
Let me break it down for you,
my simple white friend.
You see all these pictures?
About once a decade,
somebody comes up with a plan
to fix Douglas.
Donors throw a little money
at it,
or a politician
gives it a new name.
In 2008, the music teacher
went on "Ellen."
That was supposed to help.
What it usually amounts to
is a bunch of empty promises.
A pool that never opens
or theater
that's always coming soon.
The helpers care about
these kids just long enough
to get a pat on the back
and their picture taken.
And then they stop caring.
'Cause they already
got what they really wanted.
They're over there,
and we're over here.
And people like me are left
to make up the difference
using our paychecks
to buy school supplies
and giving each kid their own
handshake so they feel special.
- D-man, I had no idea.
- Now, you may be tempted
to burden me with
your guilt about this
in hopes that I will make you
feel better, but I will not.
Tic Tac?
- Hey, Mr. T!
Free swag!
- Oh, that was so annoying.
- Yeah, that Uber driver
would not shut up
about
how much he loves America.
Oh, the City Hall
thing sucked too.
- It didn't just suck.
You don't get it.
It's over.
It's nice that you feel bad,
but in six weeks your life
is going to be the exact same.
Me and Aisha and all the other
Douglas kids
will be gone, and there's
nothing we can do about it.
- Guess who's staying
at Bayside?
How'd your thing go?
- Bad.
What do you mean
you're staying at Bayside?
- Coach Slater and I
figured out a loophole.
He awarded me the Tiger Woods
Ex-wife Scholarship
for Faithful Female Golfers.
All I got to do
is play golf this spring,
not bring up
anybody's marriage,
and I can stay
until I graduate.
- What? So, you're just going
to abandon me?
- You told me to fight,
so I fought.
You can do the same thing.
I'm sure
that we can find a way for--
- Even if we could,
what about DeVante?
Or all the other Douglas kids
getting screwed over by this?
You know what?
I thought I changed things
around here, but I didn't.
The only thing that happened
was that this place changed us.
It made you selfish
and me a quitter.
[both speaking Spanish]
- Uh-oh,
they're yelling in Spanish.
- Lexi, that's racist just
to assume that's Spanish.
- I'm done.
I don't want to be here
six more weeks
or even six more seconds.
I'm ending my time at Bayside.
I give up.
- Daisy!
- She isn't here.
- She wasn't in the library
either.
- I checked the girls'
locker room.
She wasn't in the showers,
but I placed a security camera
in case she comes back.
It's connected
to this app on my phone.
- Jesus Christ!
[phone clatters]
- We need to find her.
It sounded like she's going
to do something really bad.
- Hey, Aisha.
- I can't talk about us
right now.
- No, no, no, it's Daisy.
I just saw her running
to Toddman's office crying.
- Is that [indistinct] herb?
Oh, my God, are you
trying to get expelled?
- Don't come any closer
or I'll do it.
- Hey, I have a question.
- Well, there are no
stupid questions.
Only stupid askers.
- This feels like
it's moving really fast.
Should we maybe
just take a beat
and have a larger conversation
about what's best
for the kids long-term?
- Uh-oh. I cut through
the red tape
and got something done
too quickly?
Call the police!
Just kidding, they all know me.
- It's just
we can't mess this up.
Kids' futures are at stake.
- Oh, I agree.
But you are the
Principal of Bayside,
so you should probably focus
on their futures.
Unless you don't want that
to be your job anymore.
- Oh, okay, okay.
Maybe we should just put a pin
in this and circle
back in themorning.
You are a greasy witch.
- Excuse me?
- You heard me!
You don't give a damn about
Douglas or any of the kids
you're kicking out of Bayside.
You just want them gone.
Y-you greasy witch!
God damn it.
I can't think of another
insult.
I'm so mad!
I should have said this back
when you and your terrible son
tried to get DeVante expelled.
But you know what?
I'm saying it right now.
You want to do this,
you're going to have to
get through me first.
Because so help me God,
I will not let you hurt him
or any of my kids ever again,
you greasy witch--damn it.
Oh, what's another word--
- Okay, it's time to go.
Time to go.
You all right Mr. T?
- So, you're just going to
rile up a white lady
and leave me here with her?
- I was unhinged back there.
I screamed in a woman's face.
And for what?
They're still going to send you
back to that terrible school,
and I probably just
lost my job.
Why would I do that?
- For me.
I think someone just earned
himself a Fillet-O-Fish.
[brakes screech]
All right now,
you're going a little fast.
- I'll do it.
I want to get expelled.
- Where'd you even get that?
- There's a pop-up dispenser
in the parking lot
of The Max.
- Daisy.
I know that you're mad at me,
but don't
throw away your future.
- I'm not mad. I'm done.
I put everything I could into
changing this place
to make it better,
and I failed.
I can't change Bayside.
I can't change the world.
I can't even change
my own ringtone.
It's "Mr. Bombastic."
- Of course,
you've changed Bayside.
I mean, you've changed me.
I just spent my whole day
at the White House helping you.
- Three months ago, I didn't
even know what helping was.
- We talked about paperwork.
I waited in a line.
- Daisy,
I rode in an Uber X.
We are not the same people
we were when you got here.
- And plus, you helped save
DeVante from getting expelled.
And I never would have won
that talent show
without you backing me
on the upright base.
- And you fought for
the Douglas kids
when no one else was.
- And this fight's not over
because now
we're the type of people
who want to fight with you.
- Yes.
- That's right.
- Thanks, I needed that.
And you're right.
The only way
we're going to win this
is if we do it together.
- Come here.
- I'm so proud of you.
- Oh, I love you guys.
- Hey, Aisha,
can we talk about
that sort of insane thing
I did earlier?
- No need. I'm perfectly happy
pretending that never happened.
- Listen, you know,
I love pretending.
I mean, right before
you got here,
I was pretending
this mechanical pencil
was a big scary needle.
Aah!
Look, I don't want to pretend
in our relationship.
I want to be real.
- Okay.
- I've done a pretty bad job
of listening to you all day,
but I am finally
paying attention.
For example, I can tell that
you don't want to be having
this conversation right now.
And I also noticed
that you don't mind the idea
of not seeing me every day.
And I noticed that you cringed
when I said the word love.
But I can't help how I feel.
I do love you.
- Okay, sorry.
I did just cringe,
but I really like you,
and I'm having fun.
- I know.
But when someone doesn't feel
the same way about you
that you feel about them,
it's not a good fun.
It's a sad fun,
like acruise.
- Man, this is over, isn't it?
- Yeah, I think it might be.
- Can I grab your butt
one more time?
- Yes. Thank you for asking.
[soft music]