Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends (1981) s01e09 Episode Script

1
Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends.
Iceman and Firestar.
Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends.
Help! Help!
Do not be afraid.
The Amazing Spider-Man will save you.
What the?
Help!
Nuts!
Cut! Cut!
Mr Blockbuster,
you may be a great movie-maker,
but this movie is jinxed.
Ml-
That's the fifth Spider-Man this week.
I give up.
I think maybe this movie is jinxed.
Over budget, overtime.
I'm losing a fortune.
Send everybody home for the day.
What's going on?
I can't turn the wheel.
Somebody. Anybody.
This is Stan Blockbuster.
I'm being kidnapped in my own car.
No one can hear you, Stan.
You are my prisoner.
I am Mysterio, Master of Illusion.
What is this?
You trying to get a part in my movie?
- Stop!
- Silence, you stuffed buffoon.
I am in control here.
All the accidents your movie
has suffered were not accidents.
I caused them. For one purpose,
to get the real Spider-Man here
to play himself in the movie.
- But why?
- Revenge. Money.
I'll make Spider-Man
look like the fool he is.
Then I'll make a fortune
showing the movie to the world.
Wait a minute. This is my movie.
I've sunk everything I've got into it.
Interfere with me
and you'll suffer the same fate
I've prepared for Spider-Man.
That's the Incredible Hulk.
This is my Hulk,
and the new star of my movie.
And if you don't do what I tell you
That thing's good.
OK, let's make a deal.
Mysterio doesn't make deals.
Call him off. Please don't hurt me.
No. Not my limo.
That's inhuman.
You could have been in that car.
You will do as I say
because you have everything to lose.
Anything you say.
I'll get Spider-Man for you.
Spider-Man will never know
that his last scene in the movie
will be his last scene anywhere.
"Spider-Man, let me make you a star."
"Call Stan Blockbuster."
Do you think Spidey
would go to Hollywood?
I hope so, cos I want to go with him
and meet my favourite actress,
that gorgeous Honey Dove.
And I could meet my favourite hunk,
Lance Macho.
- Look.
- Spider-Man, wherever you are,
I will make you the star
of my multimillion-dollar film.
Stan Blockbuster wants you.
Let's get Peter. He's still researching
his paper in the library.
Still? He's been there for three days.
- Maybe he's under D for "disappeared".
- No. More like E for "exhausted".
Ms Lion, no noise in the library.
She found him. Under S for "snoring".
- I hate to do it, but
- Time to wake the man up.
No, not a snowball.
How about a cold shower?
It's Dr Doom. It's the Green Goblin.
What?
Come on. We've got
something exciting to show you.
It might be fun, but I've got
this important research paper to finish.
- But, Peter
- It's Aunt May.
Going into a pawn shop?
Aunt May?
Why are you selling
your family jewellery?
Money is a problem for me right now.
The house payments, you know.
I don't want to lose my home.
You keep your family memories
and leave the house payment
and the other bills to me.
- How much do you need?
- Well, the exact total comes to
- Well, that's not too bad.
- And 38 cents.
And 38 cents.
We'll help too, Aunt May.
And we'll start right now.
Oh. my-
- Spider-Friends
- Go for it!
Since this is showbiz,
I better make a flashy entrance.
The one and only friendly neighbourhood
Spider-Man at your service?
Get in line with the rest of 'em,
funny man.
Stand back, Spidey.
We'll take care of the impostors.
- No fair.
- What are you clowns doing?
- Not bad.
- Hooray for Hollywood.
It's you. At last.
I mean,
I will make you the star of my film
and pay your way to the West Coast.
How much do you want?
And 38 cents? That's all?
I mean, yeah, I think I can manage it.
It's a deal.
- Great. We're ready to go.
- We?
- I won't go without my Sidekicks.
- Thanks, Kemo Sabe.
- I don't know.
- All or nothing.
Alright,
I'll have the tickets ready tomorrow.
Hollywood, here we come.
Bus tickets?
Remember, I want to meet Lance Macho.
And you must introduce me
to Honey Dove.
WI, fl lly, hi
Sorry, you'll have to take a detour.
The Incredible Hulk
has been sighted in this area.
He's very dangerous. We've
cordoned off all roads for 5O miles.
- The Hulk?
- Hope he doesn't delay us.
We start the picture tomorrow.
Look! In the sky!
Get the net over him!
Stupid soldiers throw net on Hulk.
Hulk stronger than anything.
Surround the monster.
Everywhere Hulk go,
soldiers attack Hulk, call Hulk monster.
Now Hulk mad.
Now soldiers better leave Hulk alone.
Tree pretty-
Hulk rest here.
I've changed back.
I'm no longer the Hulk.
But where am I this time?
This'll take you to the last stop.
Los Angeles.
Superheroes on a bus.
What are you advertising?
- Comic books.
- If I had 5O cents, I'd buy one.
They say Hollywood is paved with gold.
That's where we're going.
To make a movie about Spider-Man here.
- Sure.
- It's true.
I'll prove it. You need a job?
- I'll get you a job on my movie.
- If you're for real, I'll take it.
Any friend of yours can
work for me any time as a janitor.
I'll take it. And thanks, Spidey.
Now to work.
At last,
Spider-Man exactly where I want him.
And the cameras will record his doom
for the world to see.
I have so many ways to dispose of him.
My first choice is the giant ape.
In this scene, you rescue the lady
from the giant mutant ape.
That thing?
My technicians will operate it.
Nothing to worry about.
- Pretend you're fighting it.
- OK, you're the boss.
Here comes Spidey to the rescue.
Give the ape a big hand.
I didn't read this in the script.
We're improvising. Keep going.
You poor guy.
- Somethings wrong.
- I can't breathe. It's crushing me!
Can't breathe. It's crushing me!
Thanks, Angel.
- Great stuff, Spidey.
- But it almost killed me.
Don't be silly. A little
mechanical malfunction, that's all.
Ten-minute break,
then over to the next set.
Well, anything is worth it
to save Aunt May's house.
Where did that meddling Firestar
come from?
Idiot. I sent you out to get one
superhero and you bring back three.
But it wasn't my idea.
Spider-Man wouldn't come without 'em.
Then I will take care of them as well.
We've been here a whole day
and I still haven't seen Lance Macho.
Yeah, and don't forget about Honey Dove.
I'm her biggest fan.
So I can destroy you
through your mindless idol worship.
If they want movie stars
they'll get movie stars.
Lance Macho, you will destroy Firestar.
And Honey Dove will destroy Iceman.
Now, all you got to do
is climb up on the mast
while our fake mechanical shark
swims around you a while.
A mechanical shark?
Are you sure it's safe?
Trust me.
Action. Let's go.
Turn on the wave machine.
Wind machine.
I think I saw this movie.
I'm getting out of here.
Too much wind.
No!
Spidey!
People do this for a living?
Blockbuster, you will introduce
Firestar and Iceman to these stars.
- Now.
- I don't mind you having a little fun,
- but you almost killed Spider-Man.
- I know.
What are you guys made of?
- Firestar, meet
- Lance Macho.
You're far more beautiful
than I expected, Firestar.
Let's get to know each other very well.
Very well?
- And, Iceman, this is
- Honey Dove.
I know.
Let's take a walk, Mr Cool,
and talk about the private scenes
we'll play together.
You aliens, get your heads on.
This red light on my ray gun
just went on. What's it for?
Who cares? They're only toys.
In this scene,
you're fighting the aliens.
Pretend the fake ray guns
are really zinging you. Action.
Those beams hurt.
This Arctic room can actually
reach temperatures way below freezing.
Like this.
Lance, turn it off.
Come on. I can't stand the cold.
A robot can stand anything.
Here comes the galactic spider patrol.
There's something strange
about you, Honey.
- I know.
- My cold doesn't bother you a bit.
Let's see what happens if I turn it up.
Feels yummy.
I knew you were too good to be true.
- Over here.
- Firestar. Hang on.
You were fooled by a hologram,
a three-dimensional image.
- Just like this.
- Mysterio.
This is just your special effects stuff.
The lights. They're burning hot.
OK, I've saved the universe.
What's next?
Spider-Man, I must talk to you.
Quit bothering my star. Beat it.
There is danger, real danger.
He can't hear me.
No, I can't change. Got to get away.
Why Hulk in funny place?
Heat.
A couple of minutes in the cold room
will fix you up.
Robot, your final orders.
When the cameras roll,
you will destroy Spider-Man.
This is the pulse-pounding,
sense-shattering climax of the film.
Make it look good.
This is your last scene.
Action.
How did he do that?
Oh, no. Not again.
I forgot. These buildings aren't real.
Blockbuster, I want out of this movie.
Keep rolling.
I hate myself but this is great stuff.
I know this wasn't in the script.
Only one Hulk.
Hulk smash phoney Hulk.
Spidey, are you OK?
Yeah, but look out.
New York is about to come tumbling down.
Who needs dumb town
where everything fall down?
- Spidey. Mysterio's behind all this.
- Mysterio? No wonder.
The cameras are still rolling.
The world will see your finish,
web-slinger.
More illusions.
Yes, but not these.
For a guy who wears a fish bowl on his
head, you sure cause a lot of trouble.
I'll return another day.
Well, I have next Tuesday free,
but why wait?
The greatest fight ever
and I've got it all on film.
Stan, I tried to tell you.
We ran out of film.
Oh, no. All that beautiful violence
and destruction for nothing.
Not quite for nothing.
I'll take my salary now.
Yeah, and no cheap bus fare back either.
Don't forget the 38 cents.
- My money's good.
- But you're not, Stan.
You would have let Mysterio finish me.
I'm afraid I've got to turn you in.
Yeah, you're right.
Say, I've always wanted
to make a prison picture.
Now I'll have my chance.
- Look.
- It's them. It's really them.
- Look out.
- May I have your autograph, please?
I think you're the greatest thing
since frozen yoghurt.
But you're the real thing.
And you want our autographs?
With pleasure.
Hold everything.
I thought I was the star of this movie.
Just goes to show you
There's always someone
who can look up to you.
By tomorrow Aunt May
will have the money to save her house,
so I guess we really can say
Hooray for Hollywood!