What If...? (2021) s01e09 Episode Script

1 Time.
Space.
Reality.
It's more than a linear path.
It's a prism of endless possibility, where a single choice can branch out into infinite realities, creating alternate worlds from the ones you know.
I am the Watcher.
I am your guide through these vast new realities.
Follow me and ponder the question "What if?" The Lemurian Star.
They were sending their last payload when pirates took the ship.
- How many pirates? - Twenty or so charmers led by Batroc.
Before French special forces showed him the door, he racked up 36 kill missions.
Hmm.
Sounds more like your type.
Fine.
I've got the shield.
You've got the sword.
More like knives, but cute wordplay.
Kill the engines and find the hostages.
Gentlemen, watch our six.
STRIKE Team, you heard the captain, gear up.
So, any plans for Saturday night? No, don't.
Stop right there.
Bernard in accounting was asking about you.
Nothing good has ever followed the phrase, "Bernard in accounting.
" What if his name was Steve? Ouch! Just when we were becoming pals, Widow.
I thought you were more than just a shield.
I'm a pretty good dancer, too.
I'm too fast.
Oh! That was good.
- Whoa! - What? Are you scared? Are you seeing that? Captain Carter, the soldier lost in time, you have been chosen.
Oh, come on.
Relax, son.
It'll all be over in a thousand years or so.
Huh? Hey.
Stay here.
Leave this fight to us.
I got it.
Yeah.
Hang back with the giant baby-man cape dude.
Star-Lord T'Challa, leader of the Ravagers and lost Prince of Wakanda, you have been chosen.
These Infinity Stones I'm out of the weapons business, not my cake.
But how do we put a suit of armor around the world? Hmm? Around the galaxy? You can't tell me there's not another big, bad lurking-in-the-shadows monster under the bed.
Tony! Gamora, survivor of Sakaar and destroyer of Thanos And one who's about to kick your moon-shaped, ugly mug.
Not you, Stark.
You, Gamora, have been chosen.
Killmonger must be tried for murder under Wakandan law.
The Americans can have him after we're finished.
Erik Stevens, Killmonger, Tony Stark's former protégé and killer, you have been chosen.
We were about to go on a date! There were gonna be flowers, and I was gonna light candles, and I was gonna shower and do my hair.
Nobody messes with Vegas.
How about you? And you? Finally, Thor Odinson, Crown Prince of As And you.
And you.
You've been cho - Have at you, too.
- Thor.
Thor! - And you.
And you.
- Shh.
Calm down.
Thor Odinson, Crown Prince of Asgard You've been chosen.
Oh, we're in a pub.
I know this place.
The pub facade was my idea.
I read about it in your biography.
I hope you like it.
Over here.
Me, me.
Can I get a beer? Yes! - Uh, who are you? - Where am I? Why did you bring us here? What do you want with us? All good questions.
Send me back.
Now.
- It's you again.
- Come on.
Get a new trick, man.
You have been chosen for a mission that is both highly dangerous and absolutely necessary for the continuation of life as you know it.
At first, I scoured eternity for one true hero.
Then I saw the bigger picture.
This mission requires a team.
The perfect combination of skills and experience that alone will triumph.
Let me get this straight.
You kidnapped us from across the galaxy so we could, what? Save the universe? Mmm.
Not exactly.
Bit more complicated than that.
You aren't just our best hope to save one universe.
You are my last hope to save all of them.
You are the Guardians of the Multiverse.
I know what this is.
Loki put you up to this joke.
Listen, I do not have time for his pranks today.
No, I wouldn't do that.
My lady Jane needs me.
So, I'll be going.
Enjoy yourse We're in.
Mind telling us what we're up against? Your worlds are either under attack or soon will be by Ultron, an artificial intelligence elevated to a cosmic being thanks to an enhanced synthetic body and the power of the Infinity Stones.
Six stones of near unfathomable power.
Each controlling an essential aspect of our existence.
And Ultron holds all of them.
I might be able to help with that.
I've stolen more from worse.
Seriously? You really are from another planet.
We believe the only way to stop Ultron is to separate his body from the stones.
But this Ultron could be hiding anywhere in the Multiverse? - Yes.
- Behind an army of killer robots? - Afraid so.
- And armed with a full set of stones? - She's got a point.
- I never said it would be easy.
This is a suicide mission.
Um, excuse me, yeah.
Is there a universe of Chinese food that has alternate dimension delivery? Tummy's getting rumbly.
You picked them.
Well, obviously the first step would be finding him.
Well, I'm not one to brag, but I've been told that I excel at attracting unwanted attention.
Oh.
That will come in handy.
And after we recover the stones, we destroy them.
How would you even go about destroying the Oh, you're answering my question.
Sorry.
Thank you.
The Infinity Crusher, designed to disintegrate each stone into nothing.
Yep.
I picked them.
All right, everyone, you all know what to do.
You know the plan.
Get the Soul Stone and get it to Gamora.
We'll hold the line.
And then she'll unleash the Crusher.
With some luck, we'll be home for dinner.
Okay, wait.
Slow down a little bit.
There's a few people in the room that don't understand.
Not me.
I get it.
But for them, maybe repeat it.
Hmm.
You're ready.
It's showtime, my friends.
Good luck.
This place is safe? Apparently, there's not enough intelligent life here to attract Ultron.
Until we decide to.
Can I ask, what happened? Same thing that happened to you.
Love.
I take it you know the Captain Carter on your universe? No.
Captain America.
In my universe, Steve Rogers received the serum.
Now, that would be a sight to see.
You trust him? I trust everyone.
Hasten, friends.
Tonight we feast.
For tomorrow, we fight.
In that spirit, I propose a toast.
- Some mead.
Wonderful.
- Ooh.
Now we're talking.
A wise sorcerer once told me that to face death is part of the plan.
To face death is to conquer one's greatest fear of the unknown of nothingless space, of the end of all ends.
The senseless nothing and the vast opening of infinity to your Let me.
You've done enough, Doctor.
To the Guardians of The Multiverse.
The Multiverse! So there is life in this universe, after all.
There goes waiting until we're ready.
In my defense, I did warn you.
I excel at attracting unwanted attention.
Mmm-hmm.
All right, here comes a non-compliant spell.
Yeah, you might feel it.
Whoo! - Oh, what is going on? - It's a protection spell.
You're welcome.
Wow! This is fantastic.
Showtime.
Watcher! See you on the flip side.
I know how to deal with this party pooper.
Wait! Thor, the plan.
Viva Las Vegas! What? Can't say I've heard that battle cry before.
All too easy.
Interesting.
Usually, you people are much easier to kill.
Blimey! Not even a scratch.
You weren't kidding about a protection spell.
You're protected, but it won't last long.
Whoo! - We're up.
Are you sure about this? - Of course not.
Here we go.
Now! Ha! - Gotcha.
- Get off! Did you get it? As Yondu says, "Never doubt sticky fingers.
" Go! Go! What? You've been hiding that the entire time? Well, this has been delightful.
But it's time for me to bring out some of my own toys.
My stone.
You stole my Soul Stone? Time to go.
- That'll keep him busy.
- Oh! Zombies! Great idea.
I love zombies.
It's not them.
It's what came with the zombies.
Oh Tick tock, boys.
Whoo! That was unexpected.
What? Blimey bloody bollocks! Oh, you made it.
- You ready? - The stone? No, wait.
Stand down.
- She's Natasha Romanoff.
- Who? Yeah.
I'm also supposed to be the last person on this planet.
We're from another universe.
Universes.
We're here to stop Ultron.
I can prove it.
Your father is Ivan.
Your da's Alexei.
And you're the one woman I trust to have my six, including now.
There are three people you trust in the universe, and I count myself lucky enough to be one of them.
Well, we must be close.
I believe the term is "BFF.
" I believe that you have something that belongs to me.
Natasha! Wha I can destroy galaxies with a thought.
Why won't you die? Wait.
What? Give him all you've got.
Don't give him a chance to think.
Vegas! You're done.
Whew! Uh - Is that it? Is it over? - Hmm.
We win? Yeah? Not so hard.
It doesn't feel over.
I'm honestly surprised.
Didn't the Watcher warn you? Every universe is different, each one just a fraction unique.
Thus the Infinity Stones are unique.
Of course.
The Crusher was designed to destroy the stones on my world, not his.
Brace yourselves.
You.
It's you.
If I destroy you, you all fall.
Hey, Cap, I have an idea, but I'll need distance and a clear target.
Can you do that? I've got the shield.
You've got the sword.
More like an arrow with the mother of all viruses in the tip, but cute wordplay.
This one's for you, Clint.
This is far nicer than my human body ever was.
Who's there? Who said that? This is a fascinating change of pace, yeah? It has been a long time since I have had legs.
I'd like to make this a permanent condition.
This body is occupied.
For now, but not for long.
What? Who are you? What is your objective? Once upon a time, it was to bring forth HYDRA's domination, but you ended that.
So now, I suppose my objective is to end you.
What is this? Hey, are you all right? I'm good.
I'm good.
Mmm-hmm.
Okay, that was, uh Can someone explain, please? I gave him a virus.
A nasty one.
Cousin, what are you doing? The Watcher owes us this.
With these stones, we could fix our worlds, our lives.
T'Challa, Thor, are you gonna turn down the one thing guaranteed to save your homes? Peggy, you can be with your fella again.
Strange, you more than anyone know that this is it.
This is our only chance.
Hand over the stones, cousin.
I'm not your cousin.
I'm sorry it has to end this way.
Oh, no, no, no.
I am afraid that armor belongs to me.
Is that Arnim Zola? HYDRA never died, it just mutated.
Well, that explains the stomach-face.
Huh? We were never meant to win.
We were here to separate the stones from the body.
You foresaw every moment from the failed Infinity Crusher, to Killmonger's betrayal, and my Your sacrifice.
"Sacrifice"? That would imply I had something to lose.
Someone needs to attend to them.
If that pocket dimension cracks, if they escape I'll watch.
I have nothing but time.
Thank you, Stephen.
Mmm.
And besides, what are friends for? The entire Multiverse owes you a debt of gratitude.
But your worlds will never know this victory.
Once you walk through that door, you'll return to the exact moment you left.
It's time to go, Captain.
You'd rather return to another time.
Haven't I earned my happy ending? Trust me, that world, that time, needs Captain Carter.
And then there was one.
I won't go back there.
My world is gone.
You won, but I lost.
- I cannot in - Interfere? Yeah, I know.
We're just stories to you.
We're not real.
You watch us fight, win, lose.
Tell me, did you make popcorn while Ultron murdered my friends and burned my world to the ground? You are more than that to me.
Are we? You, your stories, they are everything to me.
Then fix my world.
I can't, Natasha.
I'm not walking through that door.
Well, the door was more of a metaphor anyway.
Where Where are we? On a world that lost their Widow.
It's a mess.
Thank you.
Hmm.
You and your replacement Avengers fought valiantly, but now I think it's time you told me all your secrets.
I was told you were dead.
Same.
You're not my Natasha, but something tells me you have her spirit.
That's it, isn't it? All creatures searching for a place to belong.
To call home.
As for me, I am the Watcher.
The Multiverse, every single world, every story is my home, and I will protect it to the end.
I'm too fast.
Don't tell me, he was your type? Oh, Widow, I've never been so happy to see you.
Did you hit your head or something? A few times, actually.
Shake it off.
You'll need all your marbles for this one.
I found what the pirates were after.
Peggy, you might wanna brace yourself.
I can promise you, Nat, this won't be the strangest thing I've dealt with today.
Famous last words.
The HYDRA Stomper? Yeah, and there's someone inside.