Agua Donkeys (2020) s01e10 Episode Script
The Jump
[MP.]
Can you hand me the T? Thank you.
So, what time is this happening? Tonight at 6.
You're doing flips off the roof? Kind of.
It's more like a reverse flip.
Like a backflip? No.
How do I explain it? MP? So we're running forwards in unison.
And then we launch at the exact same time.
MP.
And then we flip backwards.
We're going forwards, but we're rotating backward.
That sounds dangerous.
When has love never not been dangerous? Yeah.
You don't get to date the love of your life or become a legend without a little danger.
We know it sounds intense, but we just recently faced our fears.
So we're feeling pretty mellow right now.
Okay.
We'll be there.
Thank you.
Oh, and, uh I wouldn't stand too close to the pool.
Because you're either gonna get hit with water or blood.
Can you hand me the six? So, Rod, you pumped to see some chunky G's tonight? Of course he's pumped.
It's gonna be a chonky-de-splooge-fest.
[MP.]
No one's ever done it before.
If they tried they died.
I saw the sign at the Sleepy Seagull.
I didn't think you were serious.
When have we ever joked about becoming legends or other stuff? But you guys have never even jumped off the Hazeldean bridge.
Yeah, but who do you think checked to see if it was deep enough before the Cherry boys jumped? - Clark and Jason.
- Right.
And who do you think taught them how to hold their breath that long? It was me, Jer, Clark and Jason.
Well, whether you jump or not, finish the route first.
Hey.
Um I just wanted to tell you guys good luck.
Uh I don't know how safe it'll be so I'm a little worried about that.
But I just wanted to let you know that I'll be there.
- Thanks, Jackie.
- Thanks, Jackie.
[MP.]
Oh, Jackie? We wanted to say sorry for trying to get you fired.
We would've apologized earlier, but we weren't allowed to talk to you.
It's okay.
I forgive you.
Um It's been a crazy couple weeks.
Yeah.
I think everyone's had to be pretty brave.
Holy shit.
Excuse me, sir? Sorry to interrupt your day, but could I ask you a quick question? - What do you call that? - Call what? What you're doing with your sunglasses? This? This is just where I put them when I don't need them.
So fucking sick.
Those might be too round for your forehead.
Here, try these.
Dude, are we blowing it if we don't have these on our foreheads when we jump? This vibe could maybe be sick.
Everyone's probably expecting us to be on pins and needles.
Then we're gonna show up with these on our forehead looking relaxed as shit.
[GASPING.]
Oh, Miss Smith, I'm gonna call you right back.
We need to see Dr.
Hawthorne, stat.
Everybody, calm down.
What is wrong with this young man? We were prepping for some chunky gainers and my buddy squanched up his back.
Okay, can he walk? I don't know.
It's pretty squanched up.
[MP.]
Dr.
Hawthorne, you don't understand.
This is the most important day of our lives.
Okay, listen, you guys are wasting your time.
Why would I treat you when you completely ruined my pool party? Can you please just pop Jer's back? It's not gonna happen.
Get your buddy and get the hell out of my office.
It is gonna happen.
You are gonna pop that young man's back.
Hot Dog Sampson.
- Hot Dog? - Hot Dog? You didn't think I was going to miss synchronized gainers, did you? [HOT DOG.]
This place sure does bring back a lot of memories.
It hasn't changed a bit.
How are you guys feeling? Mellow.
A cross between nervous and mellow.
[HOT DOG.]
Hm.
The best kinds of legends are the mellow ones.
You two better go get changed.
I'll be down here rooting for you.
- Thanks, Hot Dog.
- Thanks, Hot Dog.
[ROD.]
Hey.
Hey, man.
Sorry about the route today.
We were gonna triple skim, triple vac the whole thing, but then I hurt my back and I'm not worried about that right now.
I just wanna wish you both good luck.
Tell you how proud I am of you.
- You are? - You are? Tell you guys that you're my friends first and employees second.
And you always will be.
Now get up there.
Throw the chunkiest gainers this town's ever seen.
[WOMAN.]
Did you say "knee sesh"? [MS.
HIXENBAUGH.]
So how do you guys know so much about plants? [MAN.]
You have to pass out.
[OLD MAN.]
I've seen it.
It ain't pretty.
[HOT DOG.]
The best kinds of legends are the mellow ones.
[LEONARD.]
You gotta be true to no one but yourself.
[DONNIE.]
You guys want some stickers? How do I look? You're kind of messing me up right now.
You look like a badass archeologist.
What time is it? 5:59.
Where's Jackie? She promised she'd be here.
If she doesn't show up, are we still jumping? Doesn't matter because there she is.
[EXHALES.]
You ready? I've never been more ready for anything in my life.
How about you? I can't feel my legs, but I actually think that's gonna make me tuck harder.
Sounds like you're ready to get tucked up and fucked up.
I didn't know Donnie and Jackie knew each other.
- [JER.]
Um - [MP.]
What the ? [SCOFFS.]
So, what do we do now? [KEYPAD BEEPING.]
Yeah, there's two guys on the roof of the Sleepy Seagull getting ready to jump.
No, don't send the police.
Send the ambulance.
Because we're jumping for sure.
We just might not land where we're expecting.
[PHONE CLATTERS.]
Can you hand me the T? Thank you.
So, what time is this happening? Tonight at 6.
You're doing flips off the roof? Kind of.
It's more like a reverse flip.
Like a backflip? No.
How do I explain it? MP? So we're running forwards in unison.
And then we launch at the exact same time.
MP.
And then we flip backwards.
We're going forwards, but we're rotating backward.
That sounds dangerous.
When has love never not been dangerous? Yeah.
You don't get to date the love of your life or become a legend without a little danger.
We know it sounds intense, but we just recently faced our fears.
So we're feeling pretty mellow right now.
Okay.
We'll be there.
Thank you.
Oh, and, uh I wouldn't stand too close to the pool.
Because you're either gonna get hit with water or blood.
Can you hand me the six? So, Rod, you pumped to see some chunky G's tonight? Of course he's pumped.
It's gonna be a chonky-de-splooge-fest.
[MP.]
No one's ever done it before.
If they tried they died.
I saw the sign at the Sleepy Seagull.
I didn't think you were serious.
When have we ever joked about becoming legends or other stuff? But you guys have never even jumped off the Hazeldean bridge.
Yeah, but who do you think checked to see if it was deep enough before the Cherry boys jumped? - Clark and Jason.
- Right.
And who do you think taught them how to hold their breath that long? It was me, Jer, Clark and Jason.
Well, whether you jump or not, finish the route first.
Hey.
Um I just wanted to tell you guys good luck.
Uh I don't know how safe it'll be so I'm a little worried about that.
But I just wanted to let you know that I'll be there.
- Thanks, Jackie.
- Thanks, Jackie.
[MP.]
Oh, Jackie? We wanted to say sorry for trying to get you fired.
We would've apologized earlier, but we weren't allowed to talk to you.
It's okay.
I forgive you.
Um It's been a crazy couple weeks.
Yeah.
I think everyone's had to be pretty brave.
Holy shit.
Excuse me, sir? Sorry to interrupt your day, but could I ask you a quick question? - What do you call that? - Call what? What you're doing with your sunglasses? This? This is just where I put them when I don't need them.
So fucking sick.
Those might be too round for your forehead.
Here, try these.
Dude, are we blowing it if we don't have these on our foreheads when we jump? This vibe could maybe be sick.
Everyone's probably expecting us to be on pins and needles.
Then we're gonna show up with these on our forehead looking relaxed as shit.
[GASPING.]
Oh, Miss Smith, I'm gonna call you right back.
We need to see Dr.
Hawthorne, stat.
Everybody, calm down.
What is wrong with this young man? We were prepping for some chunky gainers and my buddy squanched up his back.
Okay, can he walk? I don't know.
It's pretty squanched up.
[MP.]
Dr.
Hawthorne, you don't understand.
This is the most important day of our lives.
Okay, listen, you guys are wasting your time.
Why would I treat you when you completely ruined my pool party? Can you please just pop Jer's back? It's not gonna happen.
Get your buddy and get the hell out of my office.
It is gonna happen.
You are gonna pop that young man's back.
Hot Dog Sampson.
- Hot Dog? - Hot Dog? You didn't think I was going to miss synchronized gainers, did you? [HOT DOG.]
This place sure does bring back a lot of memories.
It hasn't changed a bit.
How are you guys feeling? Mellow.
A cross between nervous and mellow.
[HOT DOG.]
Hm.
The best kinds of legends are the mellow ones.
You two better go get changed.
I'll be down here rooting for you.
- Thanks, Hot Dog.
- Thanks, Hot Dog.
[ROD.]
Hey.
Hey, man.
Sorry about the route today.
We were gonna triple skim, triple vac the whole thing, but then I hurt my back and I'm not worried about that right now.
I just wanna wish you both good luck.
Tell you how proud I am of you.
- You are? - You are? Tell you guys that you're my friends first and employees second.
And you always will be.
Now get up there.
Throw the chunkiest gainers this town's ever seen.
[WOMAN.]
Did you say "knee sesh"? [MS.
HIXENBAUGH.]
So how do you guys know so much about plants? [MAN.]
You have to pass out.
[OLD MAN.]
I've seen it.
It ain't pretty.
[HOT DOG.]
The best kinds of legends are the mellow ones.
[LEONARD.]
You gotta be true to no one but yourself.
[DONNIE.]
You guys want some stickers? How do I look? You're kind of messing me up right now.
You look like a badass archeologist.
What time is it? 5:59.
Where's Jackie? She promised she'd be here.
If she doesn't show up, are we still jumping? Doesn't matter because there she is.
[EXHALES.]
You ready? I've never been more ready for anything in my life.
How about you? I can't feel my legs, but I actually think that's gonna make me tuck harder.
Sounds like you're ready to get tucked up and fucked up.
I didn't know Donnie and Jackie knew each other.
- [JER.]
Um - [MP.]
What the ? [SCOFFS.]
So, what do we do now? [KEYPAD BEEPING.]
Yeah, there's two guys on the roof of the Sleepy Seagull getting ready to jump.
No, don't send the police.
Send the ambulance.
Because we're jumping for sure.
We just might not land where we're expecting.
[PHONE CLATTERS.]