Bunnicula (2016) s01e10 Episode Script

1
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
(SNARLING)
(CACKLING)
Boy, sure is dark down here,
huh, little guy?
-Boo!
-(LAUGHING)
Spooky!
(BOTH LAUGHING)
So much history.
It's a shame Dad asked us
to box it all up.
(COOING)
Better get to it.
Whoa, is this a bracelet
made of teeth?
That's a keeper.
Man, some of this stuff
is too awesome to be
trapped in a box.
And what's this?
A plastic book?
(BLOWING)
Oh, an old fashioned
video cassette.
Fun 4 Catz.
Oh, Chester's gonna love it!
Let's see, an eight letter
word for manners.
Hmm. "Civility." Of course.
Chester, you are a gentleman
and a scholar.
Chester, where's
the little fuzzball?
Oh, ho-ho,
there you are Chester-bester.
I got something for you.
Something I think you'll find
Fun 4 Catz.
(GIGGLING) Enjoy.
CAT: (ON TV) Meowzers, dudes!
Welcome to Fun 4 Catz.
Don't be a stray,
let's part-ay.
(FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING)
(SCOFFING) Yeah, maybe
fun for kittens
and dumb-dumbs.
Hiya, Chesty, what are you
watch
Whoa.
This is the coolest thing
I have ever seen.
Meowzers, dudes!
Meowzers.
Oh-ho, that's amazing.
Meowzers, Chester.
Yep, it's real
feline funky, Harold.
(CHUCKLING) Yeah.
(SNIFFING) I smell jerky.
Yeah, I don't think so.
(EXCLAIMING)
(COOING)
(HUFFING)
Like, here,
kitty, kitty, kitty.
(MEOWING)
(SNIFFING) Oh, there's that
sweet jerky scent.
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
How's about giving me a taste?
Aw, please, little buddy,
let me just swish it
in my mouth a little.
-Nah.
-(CHESTER GRUNTING)
Huh?
(HISSING)
How about
one quick chew, please?
Boy, he's still at it.
It's kind of refreshing,
actually, to see Chesty
letting his pants down.
-(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
-Oh, it's "hair down"?
Hey, you learn
something new every day.
Now about that
magic monkey paw?
Ho-ho. Don't you worry.
I'll find it.
Gnarly, you'll totally do
whatever I say.
(SLURPING)
Ah! Ooh. Uh.
Sorry, Chester. I know
you don't like me drinking out
of the big white shiny bowl.
I kept telling 'em it's better
than the bottled water.
Hmm? Oh, Sweet!
Delicious monkey paw.
Bunnicula must have left it
for me to find.
'Cause he's such
an awesome little dude.
Ah
-(YOWLING)
-Wha
My perfect meal.
(SNARLING)
Meowzers.
(MEWING)
Hey, does it seem to you like
Chester, maybe, kinda acting
not so Chestery lately?
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
(SLURPING)
Nah. (HUMMING)
Hey, Chester.
You've been watching
that tape for hours.
Let's give your little
kitty eyes a breaky-break.
(SNARLING)
Okay, playtime forever,
I guess.
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
-(GREETING)
-(GRUNTING)
(GROWLING)
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
(HISSING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(MEWING)
(PANTING)
(GRUNTING)
(ROARING)
(LAUGHING)
(SNARLING)
(SNARLING)
(LAUGHTER ON TV)
(HEAVING)
Ah!
(SUCKING)
God, gag me with a spoon.
Even a neo-maxi-zoom-
dweeb-cat could've
caught that rabbit.
You're a bad kitty, like,
go punish yourself.
(RAT LAUGHING)
Why you hitting yourself?
Why you hitting yourself?
(GROANING)
Probably 'cause I told you to.
(CHUCKLING)
Now, go scratch up
those curtains.
(GROANING)
Ah.
(CHUCKLING) Rip it good.
Oh, uh, uh, uh, like, uh,
squeak-squeak?
No, uh, boo! Beat it!
Hey, like, what gives, dude?
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
Uh, no. I don't have
to explain myself.
Butt out, loser.
-(STATIC BUZZING)
-(CONTROLS BEEPING)
What? Hey, hey, bud,
you're like messing up
my settings!
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
You wanna know the beans?
Fine, I'll spill 'em.
Back when I was, like, alive,
there were these, like,
cats, right?
And they would, like,
totally chase me.
They were persistent,
you know?
So, finally, I found this
most excellent hiding place.
I thought it was totally cozy
for sure, buddy.
WOMAN: Look, how cute.
Bubble gum and Super Tramp
want to watch
their Kitty video again.
So, I was like catching
some Zs, right?
When all of a sudden
this gnarly rectangle
totally crashes my pad, dude.
-(WHIRRING)
-(CLANKING)
WOMAN: Oh, shoot, it's stuck.
(ENERGY PULSATING)
And you know, like,
how if something awful
happens in a house,
it fully becomes
like a haunted house?
Well, something awful happened
in this video cassette.
(SCREAMING) Bogus!
I've been, like,
trapped in this tape
for like 35 years,
taking swats
and bunk from cats,
and I'm sick of it.
And now that you know
what's up,
I think I'm gonna have to have
your friend eat you.
(CHUCKLING) Hey, Kitty.
Sick 'em!
(SNARLING)
(GROWLING)
Ha!
Oh, so, you've got
some supernatural mojos
of your own.
Hmm.
So, maybe this cat
can't hurt you.
(MEOWING)
But, maybe
there's another way.
(YOWLING)
Hey, cat,
why don't you go
scratch up her.
Go on, give her a scratch.
Scratch. Scratch! Scratch!
(SIGHING)
(SNORING)
(GROANING)
No! I can't do it.
Hey, like,
what's the holdup, dude?
I said scratch her.
How can you even
say such a thing?
I mean, just look at her.
She's such an elegant,
beautiful creature.
(SNORING)
You pushed me too far
and now your spell is broken.
Well, you know what?
Whatever, man.
Whatever.
If I can't control
this dumb cat, today,
it's just gonna
be another cat
in a couple of years.
Hah! I'm gonna haunt so hard.
(CACKLING) And best of all,
dudes, you know what?
You can't stop me.
Because, as we all know,
videotape is forever.
Hey, what the
(LOUD THUDDING)
-Hmm?
-It goes streaming!
And then Blu-ray and then DVD!
And then VHS!
Even Betamax
had better picture.
Dumb '80s ghost mouse!
Making me rip curtains
and drink out of the toilet!
-(SNORING)
-(SMASHING)
(GRUNTING)
I'm a sophisticated man. Yeah!
(CLEARING THROAT)
Thanks.
(GROANING) Whoa.
Wha Hey, awesome.
I'm free.
Gnarly, dude.
Now I can go live, like,
a productive afterlife.
Oh? Oh.
I'm sorry
for all the revenge stuff.
And trying to make you,
like, eat each other
and you know, uh,
smell you later.
(CHUCKLING)
(MUFFLED) Mmm. It's a happy
ending for everybody.
Except for the magic monkey,
whose delicious paw this is.
(MONKEY CHATTERING)
(SCREECHING)
Let us never
speak of this again.
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)