Carrier (2008) s01e10 Episode Script
Hour 10. Full Circle
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Thank you.
It's a long road to paradise and oh, I feel the pain ohh They tell me things are different now but I still hurt the same mm-hmm Haze gray and underway a world away from you and miles and miles of blue Did you get it? Well, there's Diamond Head.
Yeah, Diamond Head out there.
And then, when the buildings start, that's Waikiki.
Last land, Matt.
Next time you see it, it'll be San Diego.
Hello, hello, hello I'm glad I found you been away a long, long time the sun will rise and the sun will set tomorrow and it's been rough on this old heart of mine coming home to California to find a better way to make it through today We're transiting home from Hawaii to San Diego over the next week.
6 days home, baby.
6 days home.
And that whole 6 days home just might be worse than the Gulf kind of thing.
'Cause the 6 days, man, tigers on board.
Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
Air show.
We have tigers on board, so, I mean, let's just say we have 500 people leaving the boat, you know, out of Hawaii, you know, but we've got almost like another thousand to 1,500 parents on board.
New faces, though.
That's gonna be nice.
New faces.
Yeah, dude, all these guys' moms are coming on board, gonna look pretty.
This is my mom.
Come home, baby come home to California Tiger cruise is when friends and family of crew members get to come out and ride the boat home with us for the 5 days that we transit.
Tiger cruise You get to see the sailor in his or her environment for a solid week.
You get to go work with 'em, you get to go see what they do.
They are your responsibility, you know, make sure they know where the bathrooms are at.
I mean, everything.
Chow.
So you can't pawn them off on someone else.
You invited them.
You show them a good time.
Safety review part 3.
We're gonna go down to the basics.
No sliding on rails.
Keep your hands, uh, on the rails and climb down the stairs safely.
Next slide.
Make sure when you're walking through the hatches that you pick your legs up and duck your head.
And don't crack your head open.
It's been done.
Stay out of reactor spaces.
You don't want to be glowing when you leave.
Next slide.
Tiger cruise is not really the real deal, as you'll see.
You know, in tiger cruise, it's really all about the tigers.
Weapons department is gonna have a tour.
And if you're participating in that in any way, be professional, smart-looking uniform, because remember: You're representing not only the ship, but the United States Navy.
So be careful how you act and what you say.
It's kind of like, uh Make it all look pretty so they can be wowed when they come on board.
And it's kind of just like one big huge cover-up to what we've been living in for the last 6 months.
And the tigers are gonna be like, "oh, what are you guys complaining about? This food is fantastic.
" I was mad last deployment because that's what they did.
We was eating lobster and steak all the time, and I was like, "what the?" This is not what we eat, mom, dad, whatever.
It will be real fun for about the first 3 days.
The last two days are kind of "are we there yet?" It's a classic, all right, yeah.
Good evening, welcome aboard.
Welcome to the ice cream social and karaoke.
And we're rolling, rolling, rolling on a River doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo welcome to earth, third rock from the sun eye of the tiger, it's the dream of the fight, rising up to the challenge of our rivals, and the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night, and he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger This is called "Born to fly.
" For the pilots out there, right.
Give it up for Maggie's mom.
Go, Maggie's mom! I've been telling my dreams to the scarecrow 'bout the places that I'd like to see Like Iraq I say, "friend, do you think I'll ever get there? " Ah, but he just stands there smiling back at me We found on the last tiger cruise And I'm sure this one will be the same That it really gives us a chance to connect and kind of rub off some of those edges before we get home, you know.
It makes that adjustment when we get home much, much easier.
I will grow up where I'm wild and free thanks to you people we're free.
and how do you keep your feet on the ground when you know you were born You were born to fly, fly, fly This is Maggie, my hero, my hero! When you get a tiger, it's like you start getting back into that father role all over again and you get used to it.
So you got like 5 days to get used to what's gonna happen when you get home.
Watch out, kid.
So I don't kill you.
So, you're starting to get back into your fatherly routine and everything.
And you just like going to work and there's my kids and everything is good.
All right, kid.
Hey, I'm gonna show you how to shoot real quick, OK? I'm gonna see what kind of skills you got.
Think you can do it? Ok, let's see what you got.
Ok.
Take some tension.
You can't start giggling and stuff, kid.
You got to be a hardcore shooter.
There you go.
Go combat.
Salute final.
Put that arm up, bend down.
Watch the track.
Shoot 'em.
Bam, there it is.
I think you got it, kid.
You want to hit the rack? So, you ready to go home? No.
You want to hang out here out to sea? You got to be kidding me.
Do you think I'm ready to go home? Hell, yes, OK? I've been out to sea a long time.
Everybody has to deal with having that expectation of something when you get home and then getting back and something's not like it was or as you expected when you get home.
Um, that goes on a lot.
There will be people who walk off the boat and what, what they see and what they confront when they get there is gonna be a different situation than when they left.
Sometimes better, sometimes worse.
But it's gonna be different.
Especially in the young people.
First of all, they don't do the necessary homework before they even start a relationship, and they build relationships, you know, for the wrong reason.
In some case, they don't even know the person before the relationship.
Now you go on a 6 month deployment and now you really don't know this person.
You're trying to figure out how the relationship really should be when you really didn't even know what the relationship was before you left.
I called Tanya and I said, "you're with someone else, huh?" And she said, "you could say that.
" And I said, "ex-boyfriend, huh? " And she said, "you could say that.
" And I was like, "I don't know why you're making this situation harder than it already is.
You know we got a kid together and you're out with your ex-boyfriend.
But you know what? I've been gone 6 months and happens.
I only hope that, you know, when I see you tonight, that things will change and you'll realize, you know, what you're doing.
" Oh, my God.
Hello.
Hi.
I missed you.
You all right? Mm-hmm.
Wow.
Yeah, I know.
Are you gonna stay with me tonight? Yeah? Maybe? Maybe.
I don't know.
Welcome home.
Thanks, sir.
You lost a little weight.
They got you running on the flight deck? All day.
I didn't lose weight.
I'm just taking it all in.
6 months.
Yep.
You're gonna tell me if she's kicking or something.
You could see it.
What are you talking about? What are you talking about? Whenever she does, you can see it.
Really? Yeah, really.
So she's doing jumping Jacks in there.
She's not doing anything right now.
I got to go look for furniture.
Yeah, I know.
So much to do.
All you can do is look.
There's so much to do, and I don't have a phone.
I don't have the Internet.
So you're gonna have to help me.
And I don't have a car.
So yeah, you're really gonna have to help me.
And then after that you can get rid of me.
Just let be get back on my feet.
Right? Right.
That's funny.
Yeah, it is, isn't it? I was an when I left.
Flat out.
I didn't spend a lot of time with her.
She would try to do things for me or with me and I am like, "I have to go to work.
I have to get stuff prepared to leave.
" And it was like a disassociation for me because it was tough.
I come home to my newborn son I haven't seen.
Am I'm gonna hold him right, is he gonna love me, am I gonna love him? He's OK.
Papa.
Time for bedtime, too.
Beautiful baby.
Look at the people.
Attention on the flight deck.
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
Welcome to the U.
S.
S.
Nimitz air wing 11, West pack 2000 tiger cruise airpower demonstration.
Batters up! Batters up! Batters up at time 2-1.
And you're cleared.
Ladies and gentlemen, the super sonic pass from the right piloted by major Eric Jakubowski.
The jet craft will drop 61,000 pound bombs, 12,000 pounds of explosive ordinances.
We present the wall of water.
Nice job.
This concludes today's airpower demonstration.
For our final event, several of our demonstration aircraft have rendezvoused for a fly-by in close formation, led by commander David Fravor, commanding officer of strike fighter squadron 41.
Last on this cruise, last trap, last cat shot.
After it's all done, I'll probably realize that it was my last, but I'm not gonna plan for it and go, "on this day, I'm done.
" I am gonna retire.
Which is kind of scary.
I've been flying for 17 straight years.
I love it, I'll miss it, I've thoroughly enjoyed the Navy.
They've given me everything.
You'll never work with a group of people that are like this ever again in your life, ever.
I mean, guys that literally will, will die for you, will do anything for you.
If I stay in anywhere past this tour, then I'm basically saying I'm gonna stay to make Captain and get the Captain's retirement, which is significantly more.
It's also 7 more years of my life, which is at least one other cruise, at least probably 3, possibly 4 moves, doing something that I know I probably won't enjoy that much.
I don't want to hang out in D.
C.
I could give a about bureaucracy.
I didn't join to sit on the side lines, man.
If I'm not flying over the beach, flying jets, then I don't want to do it.
It's pretty simple.
Of the United States.
Of the United States against all enemies.
Against all enemies.
I swear.
I swear.
I am fully aware.
I am fully aware.
And fully understand.
And fully understand.
The conditions under which I am re-enlisting.
That? That.
Congratulations.
Thanks.
Hodges he's the man that would never re-enlist.
Never re-enlist, ever, ever.
Certificate of re-enlistment stating that Hodges has, in fact, given up 3 more years of his life to He re-enlisted.
I had a feeling he was gonna do that.
And last but not least, his re-enlistment bonus check for $9,829.
First round's on Hodges.
Yeah, it's on me.
And you got the rest.
Congratulations.
Hey, hold it down for me, man.
Don't do what I did.
Don't be me.
You roll.
You do that for me.
You live freedom for the both of us.
I'm going to Italy.
What are you going to Italy for? 3 years.
Don't let them get you like they got me.
I've never been in prison, but life in the Navy seems to be the closest that you can ever think of to jail.
But to tell you the truth, if I did have to do the Navy all over again or do anything all over again, I would do it.
You know, it's just better than what I had, you know.
I started a family and everything.
I don't think I would have had a family if I would have stayed where I was.
It was the first part of me growing up.
It was the first part of me getting out there into the world.
I bought my first car in the Navy.
Um, I got my first apartment in the Navy, and most of the first years of me growing up had a lot to do with the Navy, and I wouldn't change it 'cause it made me who I am today.
The reason I re-enlisted was because really I wanted to finish college.
And then it's You feel like you have a family here.
It might be easy for some people to say, "get out the Navy," but it's really hard because you know that there's a lot of people you met that you probably would never have met if you hadn't joined the Navy and it's really hard leaving your friends Or family behind.
In less than 24 hours, I'll be in my truck driving to San Diego to pick up my kids.
Kind of bittersweet, if you want the truth.
Will you do me a favor? Will you snap one? You ever been out and, you know, you're having a good night, good party, whatever, and you just kind of don't want it to end and you stay out as long as you can, and before you know I you know, the sun's gonna come up, and it's gonna be a new day, and the party's gonna be over.
And all you got left is memories.
Start thinking about what you're gonna do? I have no idea.
The plan is, we're gonna launch all of our planes off and send them home early 'cause the air wing has to pack all their bags and all, all their tools and, ah, the ship has to get ready for pulling in.
Ok, boys, kick the tires, light the fires.
First one to the Cat's got the lead.
Our mission is to go home.
The formation will join up somewhere South of Lemoore, set on in, fly over the hangar, come in, land, and then it's, you know, it's kind of cool.
You've got to have your head in the ballgame.
Don't put your hook down.
Everybody behind you will have trouble.
Just looks like a normal fly day.
Except when we take that Cat shot, we ain't coming back.
Won't you be good to yourself and don't you feel like coming home it'll be good it'll be like coming home because you need a place to stay, and I've been feeling down since you went away you better believe what I tell you, 'cause you got me Whoa, oh and won't you bring light to my day Go time.
And won't you be Have a safe flight, dude.
See you on the flip side, Eric.
It'll be good it'll be like coming home and tell me that you want to be with nobody else but me it'll be good it'll like coming home because you need a place to stay, and I've been Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure.
See you tomorrow when you get off the ship.
And I think she's coming home to me, me, me, me, yeah la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la One last time.
What are you expecting? I'm expecting to have unbridled sex, Pam.
What do you think I'm expecting? La la la la la la because you need a place to stay and I've been feeling down since you went away you better believe what I tell you, 'cause you're coming home-oh-ome tell me that you're coming home tell me that you're coming home We're gonna shoot lieutenant commander Fields' boots off the catapult.
Shut down All right, kid.
Come on.
Help me walk the track.
Shooters or air bosses are people from air department who are like leaving or transferring.
You know, we have this ceremony.
It's traditional to shoot their boots off, so I'm gonna have him shoot 'em off.
All right, you ready? All right, pay attention.
Military power, combat power, salute, all right, here we go.
Touch the deck.
Watch the track.
Watch the track.
Thank you, thanks.
All right.
Good job, kid.
Thank you.
Lieutenant commander Lonnie Fields USS Nimitz CVN 68, div-o and shooter, and it says September, 2003 to November, 2005.
So that's a little over two years You got, a couple of bonus months.
And it says at the bottom you'll never be the chief.
So, congratulations.
Thanks for turning over the best division on the ship.
It started a year ago.
Air wing 11 embarked Nimitz and went to sea for almost two straight months as part of our training for this deployment.
So it's been now a year of time underway or away from home and really hard work.
And to have hard work pay off is what really is intensely satisfying.
Intensely.
We're defending freedom.
Yay, we're defending freedom.
And we're doing the same thing day in and day out.
And I don't feel any better about it.
Not at all.
And it makes me sad to think I'm just wasting away on the boat.
I stay on the ship all day, and I don't see what gets done out there, so It seemed like we didn't even come over here and do anything really.
Just sat in water for a while.
Maybe we accomplished the mission, but I don't think it will ever be accomplished, to tell you the truth.
Absolutely.
The mission was accomplished.
I mean, we set out to project power abroad, support our country during the global war on terrorism by supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom and any other contingency that popped up.
For the removal, lose the screws and remove the tailfin assembly.
Carrier air wing 9 was in before us, and they dropped, I think, about 12 bombs or so.
We came in, didn't drop any in our two months and change there.
And then carrier air wing 8 has followed us in, and in their 4 weeks have dropped about 20 bombs.
And your question is, how do I feel about CAG 8 dropping bombs? You know, I feel about it a lot like I felt about us not dropping.
I mean, they're there to do the mission.
They're there supporting the guys on the ground if they're needed.
Everything I have heard is we have, we contributed immensely.
Operations couldn't have happened without us being there, right above them, ready to support.
So there were multitudes and multitudes of missions that happened that actually good progress was made.
Knowing the airplanes were above them ready to support if things went bad.
And it's hard to put your number.
How many people's lives were saved? You know, how many children's lives were saved? How many soldiers' lives were? I don't think you could put a metric on that and try to calculate it.
I mean, in my mind clearly, that's, it's a big number I think.
Probably.
Some folks have asked me, you know, how do you make the connection between September 11th and Iraq.
And, um, that's not mine to decide.
I do know Al Qaeda were in Iraq when I was in the Gulf and they are the enemies of my countrymen and so I'm prepared to search them out.
I mean, my president is my president.
You know, in 1996, my president was Bill Clinton.
In 2005, my president is George Bush.
I don't think it really matters as a Navy professional what my personal views really are.
My job is to go out and execute the mission I'm given with the, uh, the assets and the people and the guidance I get from the government.
Yesterday I was just sitting around wanting to gnaw my right arm off.
I mean, there was nothing that sounded fun to do while I was waiting.
I cannot believe this is finally happening.
Me, either.
You know, like, in retrospect, it seems to have gone so quickly but there were days that were so long.
Will you remember me as your airplane flies over foreign seas and breaking skies? They're finally home.
Like a perfect child I can't bear to leave I don't think my daughter would be too happy if she didn't get one.
She'd think that was a rotten deal.
Yeah, I'll grab it.
Thanks.
All right, let's get over there.
Will you remember me? Will you remember me on the edge of life where time runs slow where some can fly? In these shuttered rooms where we say good-bye when the sole winds break will you remember when there's no need to breathe will you remember me? He's giving you a balloon hug.
Hi.
Daddy is home.
He's blowing a balloon up for you.
Here you go.
He has a present for you, daddy.
There you go.
Thank you.
That's a balloon? Do you think you can give daddy a kiss? Kiss? Yeah.
Give kisses.
Oh, boy! Can you give him a hug? Can I hug you? Yeah.
Go, go go, go.
Hi, hi.
Hi, little girl.
Hi.
Give me a kiss.
We have signs.
You have signs? Hi.
Daddy's home.
Daddy's home.
Daddy's home.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-3-5-7.
You're not giving me enough time on that.
There is none.
There isn't enough time, it's 1-3.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-3-5.
You're missing that count, though.
I'm not missing a count.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-3.
See, look? Right here is 3.
It's a Twist of your body.
You don't take a step.
But you're, you're yanking me on On what? On the next count and it's like It's 5.
You're basically late.
I'm not late.
Fine.
3.
1-3.
Then it's 5-6-7.
Ok.
Oh, God.
I'm so tired.
You understand, I haven't done this in what 6 months? I told you to go out dancing.
Oh, I'm supposed to go out dancing with a 3-month-old.
Well, you don't have to go every night, but enough to give you a break.
Which you've been.
Yeah, and getting a guilt trip from mom.
Saying that a newly-born child is supposed to be A mother's supposed to be home and not dancing out and going to clubs.
I kind of tend to agree with her.
It is a fact you need time alone.
I know I need time alone, but you've got to understand that Filipino culture doesn't see it that way, either.
You know.
Rock step, this.
Rock step.
Well, then welcome to America.
Yeah.
Easy for you to say.
No.
Your mom's great, don't get me wrong, but jeez.
Just 2 or 3 hours go out and relax.
That's why I'm here now.
And I'll take care of Aden on the weekends.
Well, it will be different now that you're here, but I'd still want you to come out with me.
Hell, yeah.
On Fridays.
And who's gonna take care of the baby? Your mom will take care of the baby on a Friday for 2 or 3 hours.
We'll see.
There is no "we'll see.
" You just don't understand.
I don't.
Where I'm coming from, where my mom's coming from.
You know they're really old-fashioned.
I know that.
Anyway.
We'll do our move.
The Randy roll.
We'll do that one tonight.
Ours.
Did you show her the Randy roll? No.
I showed it.
I said, "hey, this is a move I only do with my wife.
" I didn't do it.
"Because it's a move I only do with my wife.
" Are you sure about that? Yes.
Ok.
Anyway.
Do you remember it? Yeah.
But I'd What? Beg to differ.
What? Never mind.
Beg to differ what? Nothing.
Come on.
Beg to differ what? Just do it again.
Beg to differ what? Nothing.
It's just one of those moves I don't like you to do.
I didn't do it with anybody else.
I know but I'm just telling you right now.
Let's just do the flip because now I'm like burning up inside and I need this energy release.
Whatever.
I didn't do it with anybody else.
Ok.
I'm sorry.
I know you're sorry.
No, I just You just don't understand, you know.
6 months is a long time, and I just really missed you.
I missed you, too, baby.
It's our dance weekend.
I just don't know.
I just want to go out.
It's not that I want to displace Aidan or anything like that.
I just haven't had you for 6 months.
I don't mean to just try to rush into things again and pretend it's back to normal, but I know it's not.
And then you tell me that, oh, you're dancing with some girl for, you know, 3 times a week.
You know, it's kind of rough.
I only tell you that because You know, here I am, freaking have this huge watermelon for 9 months, and then I have to deal with that.
It's just I was being honest with you.
I know, I know.
I've got to deal with it, that's all.
It's not that you have to deal with it.
I'm just, I'm just open.
I didn't want to hide anything from you because there's nothing to hide.
Ok? Yeah.
I'm sorry.
I love you very much.
Me, too.
I'd do anything in the world for you, you know that.
I'm just glad you're back.
I'm glad to be back.
I just want our family.
That's all I want.
Ok.
Me, too.
I love you, OK? I think we should go now.
We're sucking air, right? Yeah.
I'm good.
I'm home.
Happy, here at the apartment.
White's still here.
My sea papi.
It was great with Tanya.
I saw her for about 4 hours, and then she said she had to go home because her parents wanted her home.
What do you think about that, Mr.
White? Bull? Yeah.
Bull! She wouldn't even kiss me.
And I was, you know, I was compassionate.
I was telling her I would be there for her, whatever.
And then she said she had to go home.
I asked her to stay with me, and she said she had to go home.
That was totally not how I imagined anything going.
I was like, "all right, I got a kid on the way, you know.
We're not married.
I'm gonna, you know, be faithful to this girl.
I'm gonna commit to this, I'm gonna do it.
" Maybe she feels guilty.
That's why she doing this.
What? Maybe it's not your kid, and maybe she feels guilty for pawning it off on you.
I'll lose it, man.
But who knows? I don't even want to think of that, dude.
I've had it in my head for 6 months.
You know what? That makes sense.
Because you go in my apartment.
I don't have any baby She won't come over here.
She won't move in here.
I honestly think she doesn't know, I don't know.
As for a DNA test, I would say, yes.
But I don't know if you should ask her.
I mean, you should be able to trust her, but I don't know if you can at this point.
I can't even can't even really get her to come see me, dude.
Kevin missed the whole thing.
I mean, he wasn't there for any of it.
None of it.
So I went through the first 10 weeks of being pregnant and then 9 weeks of a miscarriage without him.
I mean, it was It was heart wrenching.
But really, I mean, I even kind of had to laugh that morning when it started because of the logistics were unbelievable.
Like, it really couldn't have been a worse day.
I'd just taken my car to drop it off to have the insurance looked at.
I have the only car seat, and it's in that car.
A friend took me over there, my neighbor.
Then on the way home, we swung through the grocery store.
I had groceries all over the counter, you know, when things sort of started going awry.
And I called the hospital, I called ob-gyn, and they said, "you need to come right over.
" And I said, "well, I can't.
I mean, I don't I have a 2-year-old and no way to get there.
" I knew I could have driven Kevin's car but I didn't have a car seat in it.
And she said, "oh, well, you can't drive, somebody needs to bring you.
And don't bring your child because you might be here a while, and it is going to definitely get a lot worse before it gets better.
" You are just in a unique situation as a spouse that you have to lean on people that maybe you wouldn't normally or maybe you wouldn't want to share something so personal normally, but I had to call some close friend that was in the middle of a cross country move.
And she was huge, you know.
She stepped up big time.
I mean, was in the middle of packing out her house and 3 children and called her husband and had him come home from work.
And it was great all day, but she had her own farewell that night, so she couldn't, she couldn't keep Declan all night, she couldn't be with me all night.
I mean, she needed to go to her own farewell and, um, and so here I was, just by myself, dealing with this with a 2-year-old who wants to play all the time.
It was just, it was challenging in every way.
It was really challenging.
And I know that, um, it's common and these things happen, but um, it was weird for Kevin not to be there because he wasn't there for the pregnancy either.
'Cause I didn't find out until after he was gone.
And so Well, hopefully, I was there for the conception part.
I think you were there.
I'm not sure.
So, yeah, we're not sure about That would be important.
So it was just, um, the whole thing was very strange.
He wasn't there for any of it.
Very strange but WhatWas that? Yeah, he was like, "you want to get movie tickets?" Hello.
Hello.
What have you been doing all day? Nothing.
Sleeping.
You couldn't come see me earlier? Huh? You couldn't come see me earlier? I was sleeping.
Were you now? Can I have a hug at least? You all right? Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I know.
You noticed the beer sitting there, huh? So what have you been doing all day? Hanging out.
Talking to my mom.
So, what were you talking to your mom about? What's gonna happen.
The way, I don't know, the way I feel, I guess.
Did I do something wrong? Was it a big mistake from the beginning? Is that how you feel? No, but it shouldn't have happened the way it happened.
This is my baby, right? Mm-hmm.
You sure? Yeah.
Does this guy really mean this much to you? Does he? Is he gonna help take care of this kid? Yeah, that's what he says.
That's what he says.
That's what he says.
Well, that's good, because it sounds like to me we're done.
I'm sorry.
When she gets old enough, you can tell her what happened to her dad.
Some things don't work out like they should bang my head against your walls but it ain't no good 'cause I'm screaming at you while you're screaming at me about what I think you should do and how you wish I could be I did the best that I could but some things don't work out like they should Oh, man.
I can't do it, dude.
I can't.
Yeah, you can.
I don't have anything, man.
You got a lot.
You're gonna be a third class soon.
You know you passed the test.
You got You got everybody at work to help you out.
The Navy will help you out.
Dude, I'm not doing this job.
I'm not doing it anymore, man.
It's this job, why I couldn't be there for Tanya while she was pregnant.
Let me be with Tanya for 6 months, not gone for 6 months.
You honestly think all of this would have happened? I've got a sister at home, her husband beats her.
I can't go home and kick his ass, 'cause I'm stuck here.
You think I want to do this ? I hate this job, man.
No one wants to do it, man.
No one wants to do it.
You got to be strong, man.
You got to be tough.
Why's everyone so scared to get out, dude? I did the best that I could 'cause you got to be ready.
You can't just get out and say, " It, I'm out.
" I'd rather Work at McDonalds, man.
No, you wouldn't.
Yeah.
The overtime, the hours you put in.
I'd make the same paycheck right now as an airman.
You got more potential than McDonalds.
I know I do.
I'm saying at the lowest, you know, I could still make out well at You take everything you can from the Navy.
Don't work out I don't know how much more of this I can take, dude.
You'll do fine.
Once everybody gets back home, you'll start to feel better.
Life on deployment just goes on and on, and then one day, it's over.
I've been in the Navy for 24 years, and this deployment has been one of the best deployments of my career.
The crew performed, I'll tell you, it was eye watering.
The United States should be proud that they have some men and women that went out there and represented the United States very well.
Stand by for words from strike group commander.
Good morning, Nimitz and tigers.
6 months ago today, we departed San Diego and before we execute our return to home port, I wanted to take a few minutes to say thank you for the superb deployment performance.
By any measure, you've gotten the job done magnificently.
The military is not for everybody.
I mean, I don't think it will ever be for everybody.
Some people just can't adhere to the regimen; Some can't follow the rules.
But for those few that can stick it out, it's an incredible adventure.
It's a wonderful experience, and there is nothing even comparable to it on the civilian side.
No one ever really knows for sure what they want to be or what they want to do for the rest of their life.
But with the military you're always gonna have a paycheck.
You're always gonna have a place to stay, you're always gonna have the family relationship with your shipmates or whoever.
I've loved my time in the Navy for the most part.
And I've gotten a ridiculous amount of opportunities.
They sent me to rehab and cleaned me up.
They gave me laser eye surgery.
They've given me experience in the profession that I love.
They are gonna be paying for my college.
Whereas, I'm probably gonna be a drug addict, and I still wear glasses.
But yeah, they're still paying for my college, which is cool.
Every single one of you is important to the team and the team effort here at the Nimitz strike group and here on board Nimitz.
It takes a team to steam over 57,000 miles safely.
It takes a team to cook, serve, and clean up 2.
42 million meals safely and well.
Forward, march! I went back to the recruiter.
I said, "what the hell did you do to me?" He said, "what?" I said, "you made it seem as if the Navy was all fine and dandy.
I'm gonna go in here, I'm gonna go in here and go to work, come home, work 6, 7 hours.
" I said, "I went to boot camp and got yelled at, chest ties, I had to do push-ups, sit-ups.
I don't even know how to do none of them exercises.
" And he was just laughing.
And I was getting mad, like, "why are you laughing?" I really wanted to punch him.
And he was like, "well, I told you all this before.
" He said, "I actually helped you whether you realize it or not.
" And he was like, "what would you be doing now if you didn't go to boot camp?" I said, "I'd probably be at my friends house right now, chilling.
" And I just sat there and I said, "did I just say that out loud?" And he just looked at me like, "see what I mean?" Said, "you'd probably be smoking or something.
" I looked at him and I was like, "I don't smoke.
And he said, "you'd probably be smoking or something.
" And I thought about it when I came back from boot camp, went over to my friends house and they were sitting there smoking weed.
I just had to leave.
I was like, "you know what? You're right.
" We completed our mission in the Arabian Gulf.
We flew 1,167 sorties over 6,100 hours in the air in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom.
Ultimately, history will be the judge of our efforts there.
But I look forward to the day when the Iraqi people will enjoy freedom and security under a democratic system.
When that happens, you will have been a significant part of all of it.
For over 200 years, Americans have fought and died for the freedoms that we all enjoy.
You are now a part of that, too.
And as you return to your friends and loved ones over the next couple of days, count your blessings as Americans.
And we should also count our blessings that other Americans are now out there standing the watch to protect us while we're at home with our families.
Sacrificing yourself and a very big relationship and a child for the sake of this country is what America is all about.
But there comes a point where how much sacrifice will it take to actually stop war? Is, uh, this war worth it? I just still haven't seen the purpose at all What we're doing.
I missed my daughter the most.
It kind of hurts to be away from her for so long.
This is time that I'm not going to be able to rewind and get back and replay and say, "OK, well, you know what? Let's start over again and this time I'm not going out.
" But it shows her that I'm willing to sacrifice to make things better for her, to make things better for everybody in America.
It's tough being out here.
Part of me doesn't want to do it.
But if I don't, who will? I have seen peace I have seen pain resting on the shoulders of your name do you see the truth through all their lies? Do you see the world through troubled eyes? And if you want to talk about it once again on you I depend I cryOn your shoulder Hey, we made it back.
Not just me.
A whole bunch of others, like 5,000 people made it.
You're a friend you and I have lived through many things I hold on That's it.
Home, baby.
We're home.
To your hearts I wouldn't cry for anything Ha, ha, I've never been so happy to see land in my life.
But don't go tear your life apart I have seen fear I have seen faith seen the look of anger on your face and if you want to talk about what will be come and sit with me and cry On my shoulder I'm a friend and if you want to talk about it any more lie here on the floor and cry On my shoulder once again cry Oh, my God! Oh! I'm a friend You're home! Cry On my shoulder I'm a friend To the Class of '96 of the Romanian Naval Academy © VJ Me 2010 A rainbow afro! This is a song for all the people long ago laid their plans with calloused hands, that labored in the sun and this is a song for all the children who don't know that they will pay the cost and bear the cross of things we've left undone You're on the ship.
How stressful is that? Doesn't seem to matter how you try, when a moment's all it takes AI, yai, yai! Damn, boy.
For the dream to pass you by and in the corner of your mind do you count the twists of fate and do you ever wonder why? The song remains the same all the time We're just taking a very short breather with our families, and then it's right back to business.
The cycle starts all over again.
We'll start back with work-ups, then, uh, another deployment, you know, a few months down the road.
Generated by CCExtractor Subs rip, edit, and resnyc by © VJ Me 2010
Thank you.
It's a long road to paradise and oh, I feel the pain ohh They tell me things are different now but I still hurt the same mm-hmm Haze gray and underway a world away from you and miles and miles of blue Did you get it? Well, there's Diamond Head.
Yeah, Diamond Head out there.
And then, when the buildings start, that's Waikiki.
Last land, Matt.
Next time you see it, it'll be San Diego.
Hello, hello, hello I'm glad I found you been away a long, long time the sun will rise and the sun will set tomorrow and it's been rough on this old heart of mine coming home to California to find a better way to make it through today We're transiting home from Hawaii to San Diego over the next week.
6 days home, baby.
6 days home.
And that whole 6 days home just might be worse than the Gulf kind of thing.
'Cause the 6 days, man, tigers on board.
Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
Air show.
We have tigers on board, so, I mean, let's just say we have 500 people leaving the boat, you know, out of Hawaii, you know, but we've got almost like another thousand to 1,500 parents on board.
New faces, though.
That's gonna be nice.
New faces.
Yeah, dude, all these guys' moms are coming on board, gonna look pretty.
This is my mom.
Come home, baby come home to California Tiger cruise is when friends and family of crew members get to come out and ride the boat home with us for the 5 days that we transit.
Tiger cruise You get to see the sailor in his or her environment for a solid week.
You get to go work with 'em, you get to go see what they do.
They are your responsibility, you know, make sure they know where the bathrooms are at.
I mean, everything.
Chow.
So you can't pawn them off on someone else.
You invited them.
You show them a good time.
Safety review part 3.
We're gonna go down to the basics.
No sliding on rails.
Keep your hands, uh, on the rails and climb down the stairs safely.
Next slide.
Make sure when you're walking through the hatches that you pick your legs up and duck your head.
And don't crack your head open.
It's been done.
Stay out of reactor spaces.
You don't want to be glowing when you leave.
Next slide.
Tiger cruise is not really the real deal, as you'll see.
You know, in tiger cruise, it's really all about the tigers.
Weapons department is gonna have a tour.
And if you're participating in that in any way, be professional, smart-looking uniform, because remember: You're representing not only the ship, but the United States Navy.
So be careful how you act and what you say.
It's kind of like, uh Make it all look pretty so they can be wowed when they come on board.
And it's kind of just like one big huge cover-up to what we've been living in for the last 6 months.
And the tigers are gonna be like, "oh, what are you guys complaining about? This food is fantastic.
" I was mad last deployment because that's what they did.
We was eating lobster and steak all the time, and I was like, "what the?" This is not what we eat, mom, dad, whatever.
It will be real fun for about the first 3 days.
The last two days are kind of "are we there yet?" It's a classic, all right, yeah.
Good evening, welcome aboard.
Welcome to the ice cream social and karaoke.
And we're rolling, rolling, rolling on a River doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo welcome to earth, third rock from the sun eye of the tiger, it's the dream of the fight, rising up to the challenge of our rivals, and the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night, and he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger This is called "Born to fly.
" For the pilots out there, right.
Give it up for Maggie's mom.
Go, Maggie's mom! I've been telling my dreams to the scarecrow 'bout the places that I'd like to see Like Iraq I say, "friend, do you think I'll ever get there? " Ah, but he just stands there smiling back at me We found on the last tiger cruise And I'm sure this one will be the same That it really gives us a chance to connect and kind of rub off some of those edges before we get home, you know.
It makes that adjustment when we get home much, much easier.
I will grow up where I'm wild and free thanks to you people we're free.
and how do you keep your feet on the ground when you know you were born You were born to fly, fly, fly This is Maggie, my hero, my hero! When you get a tiger, it's like you start getting back into that father role all over again and you get used to it.
So you got like 5 days to get used to what's gonna happen when you get home.
Watch out, kid.
So I don't kill you.
So, you're starting to get back into your fatherly routine and everything.
And you just like going to work and there's my kids and everything is good.
All right, kid.
Hey, I'm gonna show you how to shoot real quick, OK? I'm gonna see what kind of skills you got.
Think you can do it? Ok, let's see what you got.
Ok.
Take some tension.
You can't start giggling and stuff, kid.
You got to be a hardcore shooter.
There you go.
Go combat.
Salute final.
Put that arm up, bend down.
Watch the track.
Shoot 'em.
Bam, there it is.
I think you got it, kid.
You want to hit the rack? So, you ready to go home? No.
You want to hang out here out to sea? You got to be kidding me.
Do you think I'm ready to go home? Hell, yes, OK? I've been out to sea a long time.
Everybody has to deal with having that expectation of something when you get home and then getting back and something's not like it was or as you expected when you get home.
Um, that goes on a lot.
There will be people who walk off the boat and what, what they see and what they confront when they get there is gonna be a different situation than when they left.
Sometimes better, sometimes worse.
But it's gonna be different.
Especially in the young people.
First of all, they don't do the necessary homework before they even start a relationship, and they build relationships, you know, for the wrong reason.
In some case, they don't even know the person before the relationship.
Now you go on a 6 month deployment and now you really don't know this person.
You're trying to figure out how the relationship really should be when you really didn't even know what the relationship was before you left.
I called Tanya and I said, "you're with someone else, huh?" And she said, "you could say that.
" And I said, "ex-boyfriend, huh? " And she said, "you could say that.
" And I was like, "I don't know why you're making this situation harder than it already is.
You know we got a kid together and you're out with your ex-boyfriend.
But you know what? I've been gone 6 months and happens.
I only hope that, you know, when I see you tonight, that things will change and you'll realize, you know, what you're doing.
" Oh, my God.
Hello.
Hi.
I missed you.
You all right? Mm-hmm.
Wow.
Yeah, I know.
Are you gonna stay with me tonight? Yeah? Maybe? Maybe.
I don't know.
Welcome home.
Thanks, sir.
You lost a little weight.
They got you running on the flight deck? All day.
I didn't lose weight.
I'm just taking it all in.
6 months.
Yep.
You're gonna tell me if she's kicking or something.
You could see it.
What are you talking about? What are you talking about? Whenever she does, you can see it.
Really? Yeah, really.
So she's doing jumping Jacks in there.
She's not doing anything right now.
I got to go look for furniture.
Yeah, I know.
So much to do.
All you can do is look.
There's so much to do, and I don't have a phone.
I don't have the Internet.
So you're gonna have to help me.
And I don't have a car.
So yeah, you're really gonna have to help me.
And then after that you can get rid of me.
Just let be get back on my feet.
Right? Right.
That's funny.
Yeah, it is, isn't it? I was an when I left.
Flat out.
I didn't spend a lot of time with her.
She would try to do things for me or with me and I am like, "I have to go to work.
I have to get stuff prepared to leave.
" And it was like a disassociation for me because it was tough.
I come home to my newborn son I haven't seen.
Am I'm gonna hold him right, is he gonna love me, am I gonna love him? He's OK.
Papa.
Time for bedtime, too.
Beautiful baby.
Look at the people.
Attention on the flight deck.
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
Welcome to the U.
S.
S.
Nimitz air wing 11, West pack 2000 tiger cruise airpower demonstration.
Batters up! Batters up! Batters up at time 2-1.
And you're cleared.
Ladies and gentlemen, the super sonic pass from the right piloted by major Eric Jakubowski.
The jet craft will drop 61,000 pound bombs, 12,000 pounds of explosive ordinances.
We present the wall of water.
Nice job.
This concludes today's airpower demonstration.
For our final event, several of our demonstration aircraft have rendezvoused for a fly-by in close formation, led by commander David Fravor, commanding officer of strike fighter squadron 41.
Last on this cruise, last trap, last cat shot.
After it's all done, I'll probably realize that it was my last, but I'm not gonna plan for it and go, "on this day, I'm done.
" I am gonna retire.
Which is kind of scary.
I've been flying for 17 straight years.
I love it, I'll miss it, I've thoroughly enjoyed the Navy.
They've given me everything.
You'll never work with a group of people that are like this ever again in your life, ever.
I mean, guys that literally will, will die for you, will do anything for you.
If I stay in anywhere past this tour, then I'm basically saying I'm gonna stay to make Captain and get the Captain's retirement, which is significantly more.
It's also 7 more years of my life, which is at least one other cruise, at least probably 3, possibly 4 moves, doing something that I know I probably won't enjoy that much.
I don't want to hang out in D.
C.
I could give a about bureaucracy.
I didn't join to sit on the side lines, man.
If I'm not flying over the beach, flying jets, then I don't want to do it.
It's pretty simple.
Of the United States.
Of the United States against all enemies.
Against all enemies.
I swear.
I swear.
I am fully aware.
I am fully aware.
And fully understand.
And fully understand.
The conditions under which I am re-enlisting.
That? That.
Congratulations.
Thanks.
Hodges he's the man that would never re-enlist.
Never re-enlist, ever, ever.
Certificate of re-enlistment stating that Hodges has, in fact, given up 3 more years of his life to He re-enlisted.
I had a feeling he was gonna do that.
And last but not least, his re-enlistment bonus check for $9,829.
First round's on Hodges.
Yeah, it's on me.
And you got the rest.
Congratulations.
Hey, hold it down for me, man.
Don't do what I did.
Don't be me.
You roll.
You do that for me.
You live freedom for the both of us.
I'm going to Italy.
What are you going to Italy for? 3 years.
Don't let them get you like they got me.
I've never been in prison, but life in the Navy seems to be the closest that you can ever think of to jail.
But to tell you the truth, if I did have to do the Navy all over again or do anything all over again, I would do it.
You know, it's just better than what I had, you know.
I started a family and everything.
I don't think I would have had a family if I would have stayed where I was.
It was the first part of me growing up.
It was the first part of me getting out there into the world.
I bought my first car in the Navy.
Um, I got my first apartment in the Navy, and most of the first years of me growing up had a lot to do with the Navy, and I wouldn't change it 'cause it made me who I am today.
The reason I re-enlisted was because really I wanted to finish college.
And then it's You feel like you have a family here.
It might be easy for some people to say, "get out the Navy," but it's really hard because you know that there's a lot of people you met that you probably would never have met if you hadn't joined the Navy and it's really hard leaving your friends Or family behind.
In less than 24 hours, I'll be in my truck driving to San Diego to pick up my kids.
Kind of bittersweet, if you want the truth.
Will you do me a favor? Will you snap one? You ever been out and, you know, you're having a good night, good party, whatever, and you just kind of don't want it to end and you stay out as long as you can, and before you know I you know, the sun's gonna come up, and it's gonna be a new day, and the party's gonna be over.
And all you got left is memories.
Start thinking about what you're gonna do? I have no idea.
The plan is, we're gonna launch all of our planes off and send them home early 'cause the air wing has to pack all their bags and all, all their tools and, ah, the ship has to get ready for pulling in.
Ok, boys, kick the tires, light the fires.
First one to the Cat's got the lead.
Our mission is to go home.
The formation will join up somewhere South of Lemoore, set on in, fly over the hangar, come in, land, and then it's, you know, it's kind of cool.
You've got to have your head in the ballgame.
Don't put your hook down.
Everybody behind you will have trouble.
Just looks like a normal fly day.
Except when we take that Cat shot, we ain't coming back.
Won't you be good to yourself and don't you feel like coming home it'll be good it'll be like coming home because you need a place to stay, and I've been feeling down since you went away you better believe what I tell you, 'cause you got me Whoa, oh and won't you bring light to my day Go time.
And won't you be Have a safe flight, dude.
See you on the flip side, Eric.
It'll be good it'll be like coming home and tell me that you want to be with nobody else but me it'll be good it'll like coming home because you need a place to stay, and I've been Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure.
See you tomorrow when you get off the ship.
And I think she's coming home to me, me, me, me, yeah la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la One last time.
What are you expecting? I'm expecting to have unbridled sex, Pam.
What do you think I'm expecting? La la la la la la because you need a place to stay and I've been feeling down since you went away you better believe what I tell you, 'cause you're coming home-oh-ome tell me that you're coming home tell me that you're coming home We're gonna shoot lieutenant commander Fields' boots off the catapult.
Shut down All right, kid.
Come on.
Help me walk the track.
Shooters or air bosses are people from air department who are like leaving or transferring.
You know, we have this ceremony.
It's traditional to shoot their boots off, so I'm gonna have him shoot 'em off.
All right, you ready? All right, pay attention.
Military power, combat power, salute, all right, here we go.
Touch the deck.
Watch the track.
Watch the track.
Thank you, thanks.
All right.
Good job, kid.
Thank you.
Lieutenant commander Lonnie Fields USS Nimitz CVN 68, div-o and shooter, and it says September, 2003 to November, 2005.
So that's a little over two years You got, a couple of bonus months.
And it says at the bottom you'll never be the chief.
So, congratulations.
Thanks for turning over the best division on the ship.
It started a year ago.
Air wing 11 embarked Nimitz and went to sea for almost two straight months as part of our training for this deployment.
So it's been now a year of time underway or away from home and really hard work.
And to have hard work pay off is what really is intensely satisfying.
Intensely.
We're defending freedom.
Yay, we're defending freedom.
And we're doing the same thing day in and day out.
And I don't feel any better about it.
Not at all.
And it makes me sad to think I'm just wasting away on the boat.
I stay on the ship all day, and I don't see what gets done out there, so It seemed like we didn't even come over here and do anything really.
Just sat in water for a while.
Maybe we accomplished the mission, but I don't think it will ever be accomplished, to tell you the truth.
Absolutely.
The mission was accomplished.
I mean, we set out to project power abroad, support our country during the global war on terrorism by supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom and any other contingency that popped up.
For the removal, lose the screws and remove the tailfin assembly.
Carrier air wing 9 was in before us, and they dropped, I think, about 12 bombs or so.
We came in, didn't drop any in our two months and change there.
And then carrier air wing 8 has followed us in, and in their 4 weeks have dropped about 20 bombs.
And your question is, how do I feel about CAG 8 dropping bombs? You know, I feel about it a lot like I felt about us not dropping.
I mean, they're there to do the mission.
They're there supporting the guys on the ground if they're needed.
Everything I have heard is we have, we contributed immensely.
Operations couldn't have happened without us being there, right above them, ready to support.
So there were multitudes and multitudes of missions that happened that actually good progress was made.
Knowing the airplanes were above them ready to support if things went bad.
And it's hard to put your number.
How many people's lives were saved? You know, how many children's lives were saved? How many soldiers' lives were? I don't think you could put a metric on that and try to calculate it.
I mean, in my mind clearly, that's, it's a big number I think.
Probably.
Some folks have asked me, you know, how do you make the connection between September 11th and Iraq.
And, um, that's not mine to decide.
I do know Al Qaeda were in Iraq when I was in the Gulf and they are the enemies of my countrymen and so I'm prepared to search them out.
I mean, my president is my president.
You know, in 1996, my president was Bill Clinton.
In 2005, my president is George Bush.
I don't think it really matters as a Navy professional what my personal views really are.
My job is to go out and execute the mission I'm given with the, uh, the assets and the people and the guidance I get from the government.
Yesterday I was just sitting around wanting to gnaw my right arm off.
I mean, there was nothing that sounded fun to do while I was waiting.
I cannot believe this is finally happening.
Me, either.
You know, like, in retrospect, it seems to have gone so quickly but there were days that were so long.
Will you remember me as your airplane flies over foreign seas and breaking skies? They're finally home.
Like a perfect child I can't bear to leave I don't think my daughter would be too happy if she didn't get one.
She'd think that was a rotten deal.
Yeah, I'll grab it.
Thanks.
All right, let's get over there.
Will you remember me? Will you remember me on the edge of life where time runs slow where some can fly? In these shuttered rooms where we say good-bye when the sole winds break will you remember when there's no need to breathe will you remember me? He's giving you a balloon hug.
Hi.
Daddy is home.
He's blowing a balloon up for you.
Here you go.
He has a present for you, daddy.
There you go.
Thank you.
That's a balloon? Do you think you can give daddy a kiss? Kiss? Yeah.
Give kisses.
Oh, boy! Can you give him a hug? Can I hug you? Yeah.
Go, go go, go.
Hi, hi.
Hi, little girl.
Hi.
Give me a kiss.
We have signs.
You have signs? Hi.
Daddy's home.
Daddy's home.
Daddy's home.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-3-5-7.
You're not giving me enough time on that.
There is none.
There isn't enough time, it's 1-3.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-3-5.
You're missing that count, though.
I'm not missing a count.
1-2-3-5-6-7.
1-3.
See, look? Right here is 3.
It's a Twist of your body.
You don't take a step.
But you're, you're yanking me on On what? On the next count and it's like It's 5.
You're basically late.
I'm not late.
Fine.
3.
1-3.
Then it's 5-6-7.
Ok.
Oh, God.
I'm so tired.
You understand, I haven't done this in what 6 months? I told you to go out dancing.
Oh, I'm supposed to go out dancing with a 3-month-old.
Well, you don't have to go every night, but enough to give you a break.
Which you've been.
Yeah, and getting a guilt trip from mom.
Saying that a newly-born child is supposed to be A mother's supposed to be home and not dancing out and going to clubs.
I kind of tend to agree with her.
It is a fact you need time alone.
I know I need time alone, but you've got to understand that Filipino culture doesn't see it that way, either.
You know.
Rock step, this.
Rock step.
Well, then welcome to America.
Yeah.
Easy for you to say.
No.
Your mom's great, don't get me wrong, but jeez.
Just 2 or 3 hours go out and relax.
That's why I'm here now.
And I'll take care of Aden on the weekends.
Well, it will be different now that you're here, but I'd still want you to come out with me.
Hell, yeah.
On Fridays.
And who's gonna take care of the baby? Your mom will take care of the baby on a Friday for 2 or 3 hours.
We'll see.
There is no "we'll see.
" You just don't understand.
I don't.
Where I'm coming from, where my mom's coming from.
You know they're really old-fashioned.
I know that.
Anyway.
We'll do our move.
The Randy roll.
We'll do that one tonight.
Ours.
Did you show her the Randy roll? No.
I showed it.
I said, "hey, this is a move I only do with my wife.
" I didn't do it.
"Because it's a move I only do with my wife.
" Are you sure about that? Yes.
Ok.
Anyway.
Do you remember it? Yeah.
But I'd What? Beg to differ.
What? Never mind.
Beg to differ what? Nothing.
Come on.
Beg to differ what? Just do it again.
Beg to differ what? Nothing.
It's just one of those moves I don't like you to do.
I didn't do it with anybody else.
I know but I'm just telling you right now.
Let's just do the flip because now I'm like burning up inside and I need this energy release.
Whatever.
I didn't do it with anybody else.
Ok.
I'm sorry.
I know you're sorry.
No, I just You just don't understand, you know.
6 months is a long time, and I just really missed you.
I missed you, too, baby.
It's our dance weekend.
I just don't know.
I just want to go out.
It's not that I want to displace Aidan or anything like that.
I just haven't had you for 6 months.
I don't mean to just try to rush into things again and pretend it's back to normal, but I know it's not.
And then you tell me that, oh, you're dancing with some girl for, you know, 3 times a week.
You know, it's kind of rough.
I only tell you that because You know, here I am, freaking have this huge watermelon for 9 months, and then I have to deal with that.
It's just I was being honest with you.
I know, I know.
I've got to deal with it, that's all.
It's not that you have to deal with it.
I'm just, I'm just open.
I didn't want to hide anything from you because there's nothing to hide.
Ok? Yeah.
I'm sorry.
I love you very much.
Me, too.
I'd do anything in the world for you, you know that.
I'm just glad you're back.
I'm glad to be back.
I just want our family.
That's all I want.
Ok.
Me, too.
I love you, OK? I think we should go now.
We're sucking air, right? Yeah.
I'm good.
I'm home.
Happy, here at the apartment.
White's still here.
My sea papi.
It was great with Tanya.
I saw her for about 4 hours, and then she said she had to go home because her parents wanted her home.
What do you think about that, Mr.
White? Bull? Yeah.
Bull! She wouldn't even kiss me.
And I was, you know, I was compassionate.
I was telling her I would be there for her, whatever.
And then she said she had to go home.
I asked her to stay with me, and she said she had to go home.
That was totally not how I imagined anything going.
I was like, "all right, I got a kid on the way, you know.
We're not married.
I'm gonna, you know, be faithful to this girl.
I'm gonna commit to this, I'm gonna do it.
" Maybe she feels guilty.
That's why she doing this.
What? Maybe it's not your kid, and maybe she feels guilty for pawning it off on you.
I'll lose it, man.
But who knows? I don't even want to think of that, dude.
I've had it in my head for 6 months.
You know what? That makes sense.
Because you go in my apartment.
I don't have any baby She won't come over here.
She won't move in here.
I honestly think she doesn't know, I don't know.
As for a DNA test, I would say, yes.
But I don't know if you should ask her.
I mean, you should be able to trust her, but I don't know if you can at this point.
I can't even can't even really get her to come see me, dude.
Kevin missed the whole thing.
I mean, he wasn't there for any of it.
None of it.
So I went through the first 10 weeks of being pregnant and then 9 weeks of a miscarriage without him.
I mean, it was It was heart wrenching.
But really, I mean, I even kind of had to laugh that morning when it started because of the logistics were unbelievable.
Like, it really couldn't have been a worse day.
I'd just taken my car to drop it off to have the insurance looked at.
I have the only car seat, and it's in that car.
A friend took me over there, my neighbor.
Then on the way home, we swung through the grocery store.
I had groceries all over the counter, you know, when things sort of started going awry.
And I called the hospital, I called ob-gyn, and they said, "you need to come right over.
" And I said, "well, I can't.
I mean, I don't I have a 2-year-old and no way to get there.
" I knew I could have driven Kevin's car but I didn't have a car seat in it.
And she said, "oh, well, you can't drive, somebody needs to bring you.
And don't bring your child because you might be here a while, and it is going to definitely get a lot worse before it gets better.
" You are just in a unique situation as a spouse that you have to lean on people that maybe you wouldn't normally or maybe you wouldn't want to share something so personal normally, but I had to call some close friend that was in the middle of a cross country move.
And she was huge, you know.
She stepped up big time.
I mean, was in the middle of packing out her house and 3 children and called her husband and had him come home from work.
And it was great all day, but she had her own farewell that night, so she couldn't, she couldn't keep Declan all night, she couldn't be with me all night.
I mean, she needed to go to her own farewell and, um, and so here I was, just by myself, dealing with this with a 2-year-old who wants to play all the time.
It was just, it was challenging in every way.
It was really challenging.
And I know that, um, it's common and these things happen, but um, it was weird for Kevin not to be there because he wasn't there for the pregnancy either.
'Cause I didn't find out until after he was gone.
And so Well, hopefully, I was there for the conception part.
I think you were there.
I'm not sure.
So, yeah, we're not sure about That would be important.
So it was just, um, the whole thing was very strange.
He wasn't there for any of it.
Very strange but WhatWas that? Yeah, he was like, "you want to get movie tickets?" Hello.
Hello.
What have you been doing all day? Nothing.
Sleeping.
You couldn't come see me earlier? Huh? You couldn't come see me earlier? I was sleeping.
Were you now? Can I have a hug at least? You all right? Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I know.
You noticed the beer sitting there, huh? So what have you been doing all day? Hanging out.
Talking to my mom.
So, what were you talking to your mom about? What's gonna happen.
The way, I don't know, the way I feel, I guess.
Did I do something wrong? Was it a big mistake from the beginning? Is that how you feel? No, but it shouldn't have happened the way it happened.
This is my baby, right? Mm-hmm.
You sure? Yeah.
Does this guy really mean this much to you? Does he? Is he gonna help take care of this kid? Yeah, that's what he says.
That's what he says.
That's what he says.
Well, that's good, because it sounds like to me we're done.
I'm sorry.
When she gets old enough, you can tell her what happened to her dad.
Some things don't work out like they should bang my head against your walls but it ain't no good 'cause I'm screaming at you while you're screaming at me about what I think you should do and how you wish I could be I did the best that I could but some things don't work out like they should Oh, man.
I can't do it, dude.
I can't.
Yeah, you can.
I don't have anything, man.
You got a lot.
You're gonna be a third class soon.
You know you passed the test.
You got You got everybody at work to help you out.
The Navy will help you out.
Dude, I'm not doing this job.
I'm not doing it anymore, man.
It's this job, why I couldn't be there for Tanya while she was pregnant.
Let me be with Tanya for 6 months, not gone for 6 months.
You honestly think all of this would have happened? I've got a sister at home, her husband beats her.
I can't go home and kick his ass, 'cause I'm stuck here.
You think I want to do this ? I hate this job, man.
No one wants to do it, man.
No one wants to do it.
You got to be strong, man.
You got to be tough.
Why's everyone so scared to get out, dude? I did the best that I could 'cause you got to be ready.
You can't just get out and say, " It, I'm out.
" I'd rather Work at McDonalds, man.
No, you wouldn't.
Yeah.
The overtime, the hours you put in.
I'd make the same paycheck right now as an airman.
You got more potential than McDonalds.
I know I do.
I'm saying at the lowest, you know, I could still make out well at You take everything you can from the Navy.
Don't work out I don't know how much more of this I can take, dude.
You'll do fine.
Once everybody gets back home, you'll start to feel better.
Life on deployment just goes on and on, and then one day, it's over.
I've been in the Navy for 24 years, and this deployment has been one of the best deployments of my career.
The crew performed, I'll tell you, it was eye watering.
The United States should be proud that they have some men and women that went out there and represented the United States very well.
Stand by for words from strike group commander.
Good morning, Nimitz and tigers.
6 months ago today, we departed San Diego and before we execute our return to home port, I wanted to take a few minutes to say thank you for the superb deployment performance.
By any measure, you've gotten the job done magnificently.
The military is not for everybody.
I mean, I don't think it will ever be for everybody.
Some people just can't adhere to the regimen; Some can't follow the rules.
But for those few that can stick it out, it's an incredible adventure.
It's a wonderful experience, and there is nothing even comparable to it on the civilian side.
No one ever really knows for sure what they want to be or what they want to do for the rest of their life.
But with the military you're always gonna have a paycheck.
You're always gonna have a place to stay, you're always gonna have the family relationship with your shipmates or whoever.
I've loved my time in the Navy for the most part.
And I've gotten a ridiculous amount of opportunities.
They sent me to rehab and cleaned me up.
They gave me laser eye surgery.
They've given me experience in the profession that I love.
They are gonna be paying for my college.
Whereas, I'm probably gonna be a drug addict, and I still wear glasses.
But yeah, they're still paying for my college, which is cool.
Every single one of you is important to the team and the team effort here at the Nimitz strike group and here on board Nimitz.
It takes a team to steam over 57,000 miles safely.
It takes a team to cook, serve, and clean up 2.
42 million meals safely and well.
Forward, march! I went back to the recruiter.
I said, "what the hell did you do to me?" He said, "what?" I said, "you made it seem as if the Navy was all fine and dandy.
I'm gonna go in here, I'm gonna go in here and go to work, come home, work 6, 7 hours.
" I said, "I went to boot camp and got yelled at, chest ties, I had to do push-ups, sit-ups.
I don't even know how to do none of them exercises.
" And he was just laughing.
And I was getting mad, like, "why are you laughing?" I really wanted to punch him.
And he was like, "well, I told you all this before.
" He said, "I actually helped you whether you realize it or not.
" And he was like, "what would you be doing now if you didn't go to boot camp?" I said, "I'd probably be at my friends house right now, chilling.
" And I just sat there and I said, "did I just say that out loud?" And he just looked at me like, "see what I mean?" Said, "you'd probably be smoking or something.
" I looked at him and I was like, "I don't smoke.
And he said, "you'd probably be smoking or something.
" And I thought about it when I came back from boot camp, went over to my friends house and they were sitting there smoking weed.
I just had to leave.
I was like, "you know what? You're right.
" We completed our mission in the Arabian Gulf.
We flew 1,167 sorties over 6,100 hours in the air in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom.
Ultimately, history will be the judge of our efforts there.
But I look forward to the day when the Iraqi people will enjoy freedom and security under a democratic system.
When that happens, you will have been a significant part of all of it.
For over 200 years, Americans have fought and died for the freedoms that we all enjoy.
You are now a part of that, too.
And as you return to your friends and loved ones over the next couple of days, count your blessings as Americans.
And we should also count our blessings that other Americans are now out there standing the watch to protect us while we're at home with our families.
Sacrificing yourself and a very big relationship and a child for the sake of this country is what America is all about.
But there comes a point where how much sacrifice will it take to actually stop war? Is, uh, this war worth it? I just still haven't seen the purpose at all What we're doing.
I missed my daughter the most.
It kind of hurts to be away from her for so long.
This is time that I'm not going to be able to rewind and get back and replay and say, "OK, well, you know what? Let's start over again and this time I'm not going out.
" But it shows her that I'm willing to sacrifice to make things better for her, to make things better for everybody in America.
It's tough being out here.
Part of me doesn't want to do it.
But if I don't, who will? I have seen peace I have seen pain resting on the shoulders of your name do you see the truth through all their lies? Do you see the world through troubled eyes? And if you want to talk about it once again on you I depend I cryOn your shoulder Hey, we made it back.
Not just me.
A whole bunch of others, like 5,000 people made it.
You're a friend you and I have lived through many things I hold on That's it.
Home, baby.
We're home.
To your hearts I wouldn't cry for anything Ha, ha, I've never been so happy to see land in my life.
But don't go tear your life apart I have seen fear I have seen faith seen the look of anger on your face and if you want to talk about what will be come and sit with me and cry On my shoulder I'm a friend and if you want to talk about it any more lie here on the floor and cry On my shoulder once again cry Oh, my God! Oh! I'm a friend You're home! Cry On my shoulder I'm a friend To the Class of '96 of the Romanian Naval Academy © VJ Me 2010 A rainbow afro! This is a song for all the people long ago laid their plans with calloused hands, that labored in the sun and this is a song for all the children who don't know that they will pay the cost and bear the cross of things we've left undone You're on the ship.
How stressful is that? Doesn't seem to matter how you try, when a moment's all it takes AI, yai, yai! Damn, boy.
For the dream to pass you by and in the corner of your mind do you count the twists of fate and do you ever wonder why? The song remains the same all the time We're just taking a very short breather with our families, and then it's right back to business.
The cycle starts all over again.
We'll start back with work-ups, then, uh, another deployment, you know, a few months down the road.
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