Fakes (2022) s01e10 Episode Script

Today's lesson.
Fake IDs 404.
How to steal your illegal
business back
from your micromanaging
business partner.
Step one:
Break into the penthouse
with your secret spare key.
Dang.
Step two:
Make sure your $20,000 printer
is properly protected
with the bubble wrap that you definitely
remembered and didn't forget.
Ta da!
Step three:
Load all your illegal printing
equipment into an elevator
and move it to a secure
storage locker,
where in the lobby, burly
moving men will be waiting.
They will be doing the heavy
lifting while
Ugh! Fucking thing!
Die, die, die!
Ughhhhh! Just make it stop!!
Ahhhhhh!!!!!
I can't breath
with this fucking thing on!
That beeping
is actually the worst.
- Just move it over to-
- I am!
No, move it to your left!
Oh yeah? This one?
- Twist it!
- You!
Zip it!
Ahhhhhh!!!!!!
I may have
oversimplified things.
Ok, it was fucking annoying.
Um, hey.
Where is Tabitha?
She quit.
Ok, um, so you guys have
a really big service elevator,
right?
Like, it's massive?
Yes.
Can we pretty please
have the keys to that?
Name, unit number?
Uh, penthouse,
Trystan Smith.
Not the name I have.
What?
Smith is not who I have
for the penthouse.
Oh, right. Of course.
Duh.
It's, um
Do you both live
in the building?
- You know what?
- Uhhhh
I gotta go feed
my pet frog actually.
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you.
Ok. Bye.
That could have gone better.
Could have gone worse.
Also, Tryst doesn't own
the place?
Kind of sus', isn't it?
It's Tryst.
I wouldn't be surprised if he
uses his name for anything.
Fair.
How much time do we have?
I called his manager
and he's working all week, so
They told you
that over the phone?
I'm persuasive.
Ok. What if we disassemble
the printer?
No. Too complicated.
I can't hurt RBG.
You got a weird
object fetishization.
It's a nice printer.
Mm! We steal the elevator key.
Like an armed robbery?
Well, that's not
what I was thinking, but sure.
No, fuck. Focus.
We are over complicating things.
All we need to do
is get oversized,
overweight, overpriced printers
down an entire building.
That's it!
You know what?
Don't even worry.
I'm not worried.
I'll 100 percent think
of something-
- I know you will think of
- So don't worry, I got this.
Fuck yeah.
Woo! We got this.
Gonna think of something
so amazing
and it's gonna blow your mind!
It's gonna blow
your mind.
We got this.
We got this! Yeah, baby!
I've got no ideas.
Oh god, Z, what is that?
It's my woodworking
final project.
It's fine.
I mean, it's tanking my average,
but it's fine.
You got anything?
No.
Let's go boys!
Didn't they lose
the championship?
Yep.
Then why are they celebrating?
No fucking clue.
Those assholes broke
part of the drama stage
just to see if they could.
We're gonna host a party.
Those assholes broke part of
the drama stage
just to see if they could.
- Hey.
- Hey.
What if we threw them
a party?
I thought you invited
20 people!
What?
I thought I thought
you invited 20 people!
I did, but then they invited
their friends
and then they invited their
you know.
Yeah, I get it. I get it.
Let's get into position.
There's no way that
this can go wrong, right?
No, it's
It's physically impossible
for it to crash.
They only plummet to
the basement in the movies.
Right. Yeah, duh.
Do you want to switch roles?
No! I got this.
I'm gonna go take
a million stairs now.
Kill me.
Gross!
Hey boys, I hear you guys
can break stuff.
- Yeah.
- What have you heard?
I bet I know something
you can't break.
Elevator!
Elevator! Elevator!
Hey. Joe.
What?
Nothing.
It's just a really great name,
by the way.
My first dog was named Joe.
You named your dog Joe?
Yeah. Joe. Joseph.
Ok. I'm just gonna
Oh my god! Oh, ow!
Oh, Joe! Ow!
- Here?
- Yeah, yeah, right here.
Right here, yeah, yeah..
Elevator! Elevator! Elevator!!!
Jump! Jump!
Jump! Jump! Jump! Jump!!!!
Get me out of here.
Get out!
Get out!
Someone just get me out,
please.
I got you. I got you.
Ow, um.
You know what?
I actually think I should
just go home.
Yeah. Ice, compression,
elevation.
Aspirin.
Right, yup, that too.
yeah.
Uh.
Oh, thank you. Oh gosh.
- Alright.
- Alright. Well
Ok.
What the hell?
Hey, miss.
Mmmhmm?
Elevator's broken.
If you want to get upstairs
I'll have to give you the key
for the service elevator.
God, come on..
Oh my god, we did it!
Service elevator is ours.
I mean, it's slow as shit,
but it's ours.
Oh, that's great.
Hey, are you ok?
I just didn't expect it
to be like that.
The elevator dropped
a lot.
Was it that bad?
Kinda.
Well, lay down for a sec.
We're literally mid-heist.
Yeah, but no one's
going anywhere.
But what if Tryst doesn't
follow his schedule?
A, I think they he would
actually die
and B, his first thought would
be to yell at these kids
and tell them to get
off his lawn.
Take five minutes, ok? I'll go
get your some water.
- Ok, actually five though.
- Yes.
What are you doing here?
Nice to see you too.
No, sorry, I
Why are you ignoring
my calls?
I needed space.
Ok, there's just a lot that's
going on right now.
You're sounding
a lot like Rebecca.
Am I?
What is going on
with you two?
Who's place is this?
Everyone was saying
"Zoe and Rebecca's."
Yeah, it's ours.
What about you and Sally?
Ok, I told you-
Zoe. I am done
being lied to.
I'm tired of this shit.
Ok.
Sally was screaming
about the cops.
I'm not an idiot.
Tell me exactly what
is happening here,
or I'll ask Rebecca myself
and tell her everything.
Fine.
No, no, hey, hey,
wait, wait. Wait.
I'm listening.
Alright, so for the last term
Rebecca and I have been
printing fake IDs
and we are really,
really good at it.
So, we had to get Sally
and Sophie to help us out.
We are making so much money.
Oh my god, you don't
even know.
But, Rebecca, she didn't want
to involve you
and that is why she didn't
tell you anything.
That's the truth.
I don't know where to start.
Can someone get that?
Police! Nobody move!
Who owns the place?
Oh fuck.
Rebecca Li and
Zoe Christiansen!
Hey, please, don't say
anything, ok?
Kitchen.
Ah!
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Ok.
Daddy, call the lawyer.
Becca? What's going on?
Are you in the penthouse
right now?
I'm sorry.
Do not say anything
to the cops. Got it?
Wait, how did you know
they were cops?
And destroy this phone!
Tryst, did you have something
to do with this?
No! No!
No!
Trust me, this get's worse.
You're pretty much
caught up now.
No! Get off me!
Don't! Stop!
Ok, what are we ordering
for dinner?
Oh! Gimme, gimme, gimme.
Alright, but do not splurge.
Curtesy of Sophie.
It's not bad,
but if we are gonna reach
our monthly projections
then the singing nerd is gonna
have to show some improvement.
You'll see.
Sally will be matching
Sophie's numbers any day now.
You've been busy.
Thought about anyone else?
Ah, fuck, you know.
What can I say?
One-man band.
Like a mariachi.
Oh wow.
Hey this is really good.
What did your therapist say?
Kill 'em with kindness.
They will come around.
Hey, guys.
Hey! Oh, shit! Shit! No!
When were you gonna
tell me that your dealer,
Sally Coates, who is a teenager,
by the way,
I mean, come on, man.
When were you gonna tell me
that she was arrested?
I know. Never.
Which is why we're here.
And now what's all this shit?
Useless. Rubbish.
Wait, why you got
two drivers licenses?
One is a fake.
I didn't realize
they were this good.
Honestly, right.
Full disclosure, yeah?
I was planning on breaking your
back like a fucking Kit Kat.
But, fuck me, this shit.
Can you do labels?
You know, logos, tags.
Yeah, absolutely.
Right.
Let's pivot this partnership,
shall we?
Yeah, let's, yes.
I've got a shipment
of beautiful handbags.
They've just come in.
Need some finishing touches.
Ok, like knock-offs?
You winding me up?
No.
Is he winding me up?
Fuck it. Knock-offs?
Knock-offs are what you find
at a night market, mate.
These are perfect
brand replicas.
- Absolutely they are.
- Great.
Well Margo will be around
with the bags
and you can work your magic.
I like you, Tryst. I do.
And because I like ya, I'm
only gonna break a few bones.
And because you remind me
of me, only less handsome,
I'll even let you pick.
Fuck me.
We can talk about this,
can't we?
Oh, we're actually doing this.
Ok, fine.
Ok, hold on.
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
Non-dominant index finger, ok?
Non-dominant index finger.
Fuck!!!!!!
Cause you never
fucking listen to me!
That's why I'm fucking pissed.
This isn't about me!!
This is about you two
fucking up a good thing.
Ok, well you are
the only one that-
- Zoe!
- What?
Please. I am way
beyond talking.
Ok. This is my space and
what I need is for you two
to get the fuck out of here
before you get us all killed.
Ah, shit.
I can fix the settings.
Probably too much magenta.
Or something.
And who are you two?
What are you doing
to the Rolland?
Get out!
Kids. From down the hall.
You know, they drive me crazy.
They had a key.
Do not ever call me again,
you understand?!
I am done with the two of you.
Completely done!
So, you can't actually
print anything
and you've been lying to me
since the beginning.
Big deal.
But it got me thinking,
you know, who has?
And Margo mentions
these two teenagers.
Who are they?
Err
I'm not going to ask
a second time.
Just a couple kids.
They're just a couple kids.
Who have keys
to my penthouse
and know the specifics of
a flatbed UV printer?
Ok, please just leave them
out of this.
Alright, they don't even
know about you,
they just print the shit,
you know?
Oh no.
They're the ones printing?
No, well Kind of.
I would very much
like to meet them.
Fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!
911,
what's your emergency?
I'd like to report
illegal activity
with ties to organized crime.
Daddy, call the lawyer.
Rebecca?
You weren't supposed
to be there!
I was trying to set
things down.
Tryst, did you have
something do with this?
What if my mom finds out?
She'll probably look
at you differently,
but you'll be fine.
Or my dad or Isabelle
or Mah Mah.
She'll be so disappointed.
Becca, they love you.
They will understand.
This isn't on our
permanent record, is it?
Is permanent permanent?
I don't know, B.
How are you so calm?
Zoe fucking Christiansen here.
I am not calm.
I'm literally working through
the worst case scenarios
in my head right now and we're
not even in the worst one yet.
We're literally arrested.
Yeah, but no one's pressed
charges and we're minors.
So let's just see what
they have to say.
I'm so glad you're here.
In a cop car?
No. Beside me.
Me too.
- Hey Margot, what do you need?
- They're with me.
Yeah, no problem.
Go ahead.
Is that the lady
from the penthouse?
What is she doing?
Come with me, we have
a few questions.
What?
- We didn't
- What?
Alright. Let's go.
This way. Go.
Does this mean that the charges
have been dropped?
- Go.
- Jesus fucking christ.
Now.
Ladies. Hey, I am so sorry
about the CIA hoods.
It's a little theatrical,
I know.
I'm Guy.
It's a pleasure to finally
meet you both.
Rebecca Li and
Zoe Christiansen.
Is is Christiansen
or Christianson?
Whatever you need,
we have money.
We can pay you.
I feel like we've already met.
Do you know what I mean?
But I've got to say,
when I learned
that the two of you have been
squatting in my penthouse
for the last few months,
I was not happy.
I was not happy at all.
But then, I realized
that you two have talent.
There's something
special here.
Is that Dad?
See, I would like to discuss a
formal business partnership.
What could you do with three
Roland printers and $100,000?
$100,000?
That's right.
Who is that?
Wait, wait, wait.
Don't look at him.
Look at me.
Hey. I'm the one that
got you out of jail.
That's the prick
that called the cops.
Joel, fuck it.
Take it off.
- Holy fuck.
- Oh, my god. Please, no, no.
Relax.
See, that's what happened
but it doesn't have to happen.
Alright, come on.
Get him out.
We won't..
What are you doing?
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
what are you doing?
Get him out.
Come on.
Get him out.
Easy. Get out.
What?
Now. Out. Let's go.
Ugh!
Your babysitter seems
slightly obsolete now, don't he?
Ah, long overdue we cut out
the middle man.
Now
Oh, my god!
Oh, my god
Which one of you's
in charge?