Grosse Pointe Garden Society (2025) s01e10 Episode Script

1
Previously on "Grosse
Pointe Garden Society"
Did you do something to my dog?
Since when did you start packing heat?
My dad gave it to me after the break-in.
- Now you owe me.
- What do you want?
You'll be the first to know.
- Mom, where's Daddy?
- He left.
- When's he coming back?
- Never.
I saw you with Joel.
- Maybe you misunderstood.
- All over town.
Choose my husband or my son.
Why did you leave me for that guy?
You left me first.
What's our goal here?
Dig up dirt on Brett.
Find me something I can use.
How do we get the body to the garden?
- Then we'll use their car.
- [TIRES SCREECHING]
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
Na-na-na ♪
Na-na-na-na ♪
Na-na-na ♪
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Na-na-na-na ♪
Na-na-na ♪
[ENGINE REVVING]
Welcome to Monaco Under the Stars.
Don't scratch it.
So first thing to know
is, they're all dicks.
And once in March,
your dog has no name ♪
You don't have to tell me.
But this feeling does because ♪
You know what?
If you just show me
where, I can park it myself.
Don't worry, ma'am.
We'll take good care of it.
A bright light ♪
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
Across your soul, you know ♪
Na-na-na ♪
Plate number on the
ticket. Keys in the glove box.
- It's a mess back there.
- Seems easy enough.
Why don't you get those first?
[SIGHS]
Who doesn't drive a
black Cadillac in this town?
Na-na-na ♪
[MUSIC INTENSIFIES]
[INSECT BUZZING, GULL SQUAWKS]
[FOLK ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
Thanks for coming in.
Got to say, I was a little
surprised you texted.
Ford got into college.
- What?
- Early decision.
- Oh, my God.
- Albion.
- This is incredible.
- I know.
Okay, uh, I'll
I'll call my accountant
and get everything started
tuition, room and board.
Ooh, I was thinking I could start
- a splurge account for him.
- No, that won't be necessary.
Oh, just in case he wants to buy,
like, back-to-school clothes
or, like, boba or whatever.
They gave him a scholarship.
Wow.
So we don't really need
any more handouts from you.
Can I at least congratulate him?
I'll tell him you're super pumped.
- I just meant if
- I know what you meant.
There is no reason for you
to be in our lives anymore.
I just want you to know that I
never told him he's adopted.
Hmm.
Didn't change the conversation
we had about his last 17 years.
I bet he's pretty upset.
He's forgiven me.
He
he won't return any of my calls.
Well, you're not his mom.
Drink's on me.
[SOFT ELECTRONIC MUSIC]
Everything has a season.
Just like winter in a garden,
our own lives can feel frozen in time.
My hand is asking to be held ♪
If you listen hard,
you'll hear it say ♪
[CREATURE ROARS ON TV]
You too. You're next. You're next!
Yeah!
- Whoa.
- [CREATURE ROARS ON TV]
[SIGHS]
Your hand is cold, and so is mine ♪
Uh-huh.
Uh, babe, babe, babe,
babe, babe, babe, babe! Mm!
I can't let you die on this couch.
[SIGHS] Okay.
You need a purpose again.
What's more important than surviving
the zombie apocalypse?
Likes the feeling of you there ♪
Babe, can you just
I know, it told me so ♪
Fostering Gail.
[LAUGHS] Oh, my
- Yeah.
- [PUPPY WHINES]
- Oh.
- [BOTH LAUGHING]
Wait, who names a dog Gail?
But winter can also be a time of growth,
even if it's painful.
Just because Grandma and
Grandpa are getting a divorce
doesn't mean they don't still love you.
- Do we get two Christmases?
- Sure, why not?
- What about two Hanukkahs?
- We're not Jewish.
- Why can't we celebrate both?
- [CHUCKLES]
I think someone's looking
to maximize their presents.
Don't you worry, baby.
We will spoil you rotten
a little extra this year.
Two Christmases and Hanukkah.
That's what I'm talking about.
The the point is that
it's normal to have
big feelings about this.
But nothing's gonna change.
Except we're selling the house.
Wait, what?
We want you to be our realtor.
Yay, Mommy.
- Whoo-hoo.
- Yes.
Hey, Grandma, can your new
house have a swimming pool?
Grandpa
Yeah, both the kids'
fevers are really high.
What's he saying?
So just keep up with the
fluids and the soup and
- What is it?
- Shh.
Okay, I got it. Thank
you so much, Dr. Cohen.
- Rubella?
- No.
Roseola?
- No, nothing like that.
- Whew.
- It's just RSV.
- Oh, my God.
[CHUCKLES] They're gonna be fine.
What about me?
You cannot be serious.
I I have clients coming
in from Seattle this week.
So?
So I can't be on a ventilator.
Then just do what you do
best and avoid the children.
What's that supposed to mean?
[SIGHS]
We both know that you
always put yourself first.
It can cause complications
in older adults.
- You're not that old.
- Exactly.
I'm not even old enough to get the vax.
So go stay in a hotel or something.
Why can't they stay at Brett's?
Are you kidding me?
- He's their dad.
- It's not his week.
They're going to
infect the entire house.
I cannot believe you.
Wait, Mel.
[SIGHS]
Tell them I love them.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[PLUCKY MUSIC]
What the hell is this?
Ooh!
- It tastes pretty bomb.
- Tastes like a hamburger.
Oh, these little, uh,
croque monsieurs are good.
Uh, it's a ham-and-cheese sandwich.
Mm, the smell of all of this
is making me want to puke.
What about one of those
little, uh, chicken roulades?
Those taste like nuggets, Brett.
The chef has a Michelin star.
In what? Making lunch for my kids?
This is the third
caterer Marilyn's found.
Okay, no one's paying
$500 to come to our gala
and eat fish sticks.
- Now I'm gonna hurl.
- I feel dizzy.
- You're under a lot of stress.
- Please, I'm fine.
It's not easy selling
your parents' house.
[SCOFFS] Are you kidding?
I'm gonna make a killing
off that commission.
It's your entire childhood.
Well, I'm a grown-up now.
Besides, you can never really go back.
Moving on
Marilyn is flying in a
James Beard Award winner
from Chicago.
I have no idea what that
is, but I'm always hungry.
Tasting menu will be ready Wednesday.
- Now I'm dizzy.
- Ooh.
Yeah, I got to a house full
of infested kids coming over.
- And I have a new puppy.
- [SCOFFS] Please.
She has to go out every two hours,
and we haven't been sleeping.
Can't you get a night
nurse or something?
- For a dog?
- [SCOFFS]
Maybe you should've had a baby.
No, that would've been way worse.
But then everyone would want to help.
Ugh, none of this.
[INTRIGUING MUSIC]
Tell me everything.
Oh, well, Doug's not here yet.
No, I can't wait. I can't wait.
Okay.
We wanted to tell you together.
What is the news, Alice?
It wasn't planned.
Oh, stop it right now.
Our family is growing.
Oh, yes. Yes. [LAUGHS]
Oh! Here she is!
Here is who?
[GAIL WHINING]
Our new baby, Gail.
- Gail?
- [CHUCKLES]
I told you she wasn't
gonna find it funny.
[LAUGHS] We're gonna need a lot of help.
- What about doggie day care?
- It's just so expensive.
They're, like, strangers.
Yeah, and we would much
prefer her to be with family.
Yeah.
Good practice for
being a grammy one day.
- [CHUCKLES]
- Aw. [CHUCKLES]
Got to get back to work. [SMOOCHES]
- Okay. Have a good day.
- Thanks, baby.
[CHUCKLES] She likes you.
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- I know what you're up to.
It would really mean a lot to your son.
I'm not doing this.
I just got him to forgive you.
[LIGHT TENSE MUSIC]
This is blackmail.
You owe me.
[GENTLE MUSIC]
Mm.
[DOOR OPENS]
Hello?
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING, DOOR CLOSES]
Welcome home.
Oh, my God. It's even
better on the inside.
We've driven past this house for years.
Oh, do you live in the neighborhood?
Always wanted to.
Homes never come up for sale here.
Well, this street's rich with history.
It's hard to let these houses go.
The yard is huge. How big is it?
Almost a full acre.
Oh, it's perfect for a pool.
Oh, honey, you can put in
that smoker and barbecue pit
you've always wanted.
Uh, I'm not sure you'd have the room.
You said it was an acre.
Yes, but it's mostly the amazing garden.
- Love the roses.
- They've won awards.
Oh, yeah, we'd love a pool more.
Took the owner more than
25 years to grow that garden.
Our kids can't swim in a garden.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
[THE MEDIUM'S "GOOD OL' DAYS"]
This is my favorite room of the house.
Cool little nook.
Right?
Perfect for a young
girl's afternoon tea parties
with stuffed animals.
My kids are older.
Oh, well, she can also
cram for her AP bio test there.
And, hey, maybe even
have her first wine cooler
with her best friend when
her parents are sleeping.
My daughter is married
with two kids of her own.
Oh, well, when they visit
Thinking this will be a workout room.
Remember the good ol' days ♪
A living room to make new memories.
What's up with this fireplace?
Oh, majestic, isn't it?
Pewabic tile, original to the house.
So we could, like, sell
it if we chipped it out?
Why would you want to do that?
Because I'm thinking media center.
Could do surround
sound, concession stand,
popcorn, candy.
Yeah, it'll be fly.
- Right, Mom?
- [CELL PHONE CLICKING, BEEPS]
Whatever my son wants.
Hey, how much can I get
for that dank chandelier?
[SIGHS]
The whole kitchen
could use a facelift, really.
I am not in love with the stone.
- It's got great bones, though.
- Totally.
Right?
Let's do this.
I'm gonna need you to leave.
- I'm sorry?
- This house isn't for you.
Oh, but we want to put in an offer.
Get out.
- Full asking.
- Goodbye!
I said, go!
- Oh, my God.
- Go!
Go!
Thank you!
You don't deserve this house!
But it's one of the
most desirable streets
in Grosse Pointe.
And you had so many appointments.
They all felt the house
needed too much work.
[SIGHS]
[INTRIGUING MUSIC]
Hey, babe. How are the kids?
Their dad's taking good care of them.
See? I told you
everything would work out.
You're never wrong.
Hey, and now we have
the house to ourselves.
[GRUNTS]
No, you have the house to yourself.
- Where are you going?
- Brett's.
Why?
Because I am going to stay there, too.
Like a slumber party?
I'm not gonna abandon my sick children.
Leaving them with their
dad is hardly abandonment.
One sick child is a lot of work.
Two is a pandemic.
- Where are you gonna sleep?
- I don't know.
Like, in his bed?
That's what you're worried about?
It just feels weird, okay?
- You can't have it both ways.
- I'm just saying
No, you cannot ask
me to take the kids away
- and then control how I do it.
- Mel
Parenting is more than
just, like, throwing a football
and killing it on the dance floor.
Who took them fishing?
It's the things that
you don't want to do
that make you their dad.
- I know that.
- Do you?
Yes. Just you can't leave.
The rental on the heist
movie that we were watching,
it expires tonight.
I finished it.
They get caught.
[PLUCKY MUSIC]
Well, this is a new look.
Coach says I need to condition more.
- Oh.
- Yeah.
Uh, wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
I wasn't done. Wait! Wait!
Hold on!
I know you can hear me!
I'm not, like, someone that can run!
- Would you hold up?
- Get out of my way.
Will you stop fitnessing for a second?
- [SIGHS]
- You're not my mom, okay?
I know!
I know.
I just I just wanted
to congratulate you.
I don't need anything from you.
Will you just open it?
[SIGHS]
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
- I already have a mitt.
- Not like this one.
Yeah, 'cause it's, like,
a hundred years old.
It was your dad's.
Why do you keep doing this to me?
What do you mean?
You already gave me up.
Yeah. I m made a mistake.
No, it was the right thing to do.
What?
But you didn't have to come back.
Yeah, I chose to.
That's what's so messed up.
All of this was your choice, not mine.
I'm sorry.
And now you've you've
put all of this on me,
and now I've got
to live with it forever.
Yeah.
Well, this is why I'm not a real mom.
I don't know how to
handle this kind of stuff!
I wish I never knew any of this.
I'll just go, okay?
This isn't this isn't what I wanted.
- [EXHALES DEEPLY]
- You okay?
Oh, it can't be healthy for
you guys to run this much.
Maybe you should just sit down.
I'll be fine! I just got to
[CONCERNED CHATTER]
Are you faking it right now?
Oh, man.
I swear there was cough medicine here.
Do you want me to run out and get some?
- Mommy, I don't feel good.
- I know, sweetie.
- Check the drawers.
- Okay.
Oh, my God, it's a mess in here.
Oh, sorry. I'm between butlers.
- Daddy, my head hurts.
- Yeah, coming, buddy!
Well, it's just so disorganized.
I have a system.
What, like, total chaos?
If you're gonna be here,
it can't be like we were.
You used to store weird
things in the spice rack.
[CHUCKLES]
Ahh.
Right next to the oregano. [CHUCKLES]
- Makes perfect sense.
- Ha ha.
[LA FEMME'S "DISCONNEXION"]
[DOG WHINING]
Shut up.
[WHISPERING]
Patty, Gail needs to pee-pee.
[WHINING CONTINUES]
[SPEAKING FRENCH]
Oh, you forgot something.
If you don't write down her potties,
we can't get on a schedule.
- Did you get the Popsicles?
- [DOOR CLOSES]
Got the last box.
- How are the fevers?
- Sky high.
Ugh.
- You need some coffee?
- [GAIL WHINING]
I already had four cups.
Oh, good morning.
Hey, okay, here.
Oh. Um
oh, somebody's had an accident.
Oh.
[GROANS] This is Hermès.
- Still need to log it.
- All right, give it to me.
- Okay, okay, I got it.
- Thanks.
Go. Go. Go.
Bye.
Bye.
[DOOR CLOSES]
[SIGHS]
Look what I found with the olive oil.
[CHUCKLES] Both liquids.
[CHUCKLES] Yeah.
No, I I get the system
now, but really, Goldschlager?
Oh, yeah, that's what happens
when you match with someone
named Coco on the dating apps.
- What grade was she in?
- Oh, God.
It's not that bad.
- Mm.
- Come on.
Since when have you turned
down something made of gold?
Okay, I'm not actually that person.
Low-hanging fruit. I'm sorry.
[LAUGHS]
God, I don't remember
parenting being this hard.
Well, what about when Zach had croup?
Mm. Was that when he was, like, two?
Yeah, we had to keep taking him outside
so he could breathe,
and it was, like, 20 below.
- Did it work?
- [CHUCKLES] Yeah.
But it was terrifying.
I literally have no memory of that.
Well, come on, the doctor was worried
he was gonna have to go to the hospital.
Brett, I wasn't there.
Oh, it was during law school.
You could have been at
the library or something.
Yeah.
I guess I wasn't around much.
Mm. But you are now.
[PENSIVE MUSIC]
Ahh.
[GROANING SOFTLY]
How'd you know I was here?
Apparently, I'm still
your emergency contact.
Oh, that says a lot about me, I guess.
Sorry I'm late. I was in London.
Says a lot about you.
Needed to pick up my mail anyway.
- So how's the patient?
- They don't know what's wrong.
Oh.
You might be dying. [CHUCKLES]
What if you're all I have?
Would that be so bad?
- It's not the same as family.
- Now I'm offended.
- You don't get offended.
- True.
You know what I mean.
Heard that son of yours
called the ambulance.
[INHALES DEEPLY]
What else was he supposed to do?
[DOOR CLOSES]
- Good morning, Ms. Bradley.
- Oh, God.
How bad is it?
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING IN DISTANCE]
[GAGGING]
[RETCHING]
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
[GRUNTS]
[TOILET FLUSHES]
[SIGHS]
[EXHALES DEEPLY]
[TOILET FLUSHES]
[MUSIC CONTINUES IN BACKGROUND]
How far along are you?
I just had one too many
smoked-salmon cones.
I saw you pour your
champagne into a plant.
I'm just trying to pace myself.
Whose is it?
I
Joel's?
I'm not seeing your husband anymore.
That's not what I asked.
Please don't tell him.
I'm not looking, but we got
cars around the corner, Misty.
- Coming.
- [DOOR CLOSES]
Congrats on another
kid you don't deserve.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
Love all the natural light.
South-facing windows,
so you get sunrises and sunsets.
Don't always find that
in these older estates.
Huh.
What do you think about the fireplace?
Pewabic tile? Are you kidding me?
Landscaping out back
might need some updating.
Not with those roses.
And how old did you
say your daughters were?
Four and eight.
Oh.
It really feels like this
house should be yours.
Do have one stipulation, though.
What is it?
She's giving us 10% over asking.
- Why?
- To take it off the market.
All cash, no escrow.
- Oh, that's fantastic.
- Look at that.
You'll have enough to build a humidor
for all your stinky cigars.
And you'll have enough
to constantly replace all your rugs.
I won't have to 'cause no
one will constantly forget
to take their shoes off.
Guys, you'll both have more
than enough to stay as far away
from each other as possible.
This calls for a toast.
We're so proud of you, honey.
You done good, little
girl, real good. [LAUGHS]
At least she seems to love
the house as much as we did.
Buyer's name seems familiar.
Isn't that Gus and Natalie's
daughter from the club?
Who are they?
Her father is one of the
biggest commercial developers
in the state.
Wait, you mean, like, uh,
condos and apartments?
No wonder she wants the house as is.
She's gonna tear it down.
- [CORK POPS]
- [GASPS]
To fresh starts.
[LIQUID FIZZING, SPLATTERING]
[SOMBER MUSIC]
- [GAIL WHINING]
- Yeah, who's a good pup?
[SMOOCHES] Yeah.
Yeah, who's a good girl? [CHUCKLES]
- [GUNFIRE AND GROANING ON TV]
- No, you're too good.
You better run, you brain muncher.
- Got him!
- Great, okay, I'm dead.
Awesome. Thanks.
- [SCREAMING ON TV]
- Try now. Hey.
[LAUGHS]
Turns out Mom's a total psycho.
Did the landlord come by?
If he did, we didn't hear him.
- Yeah, hey, we're saving civilization here.
- Yeah.
Oh, hey. Hey.
Did somebody have a good walkie?
- Oh, yes, you did.
- He
he knows about the dog.
How did he find out about Gail?
Good question.
[SIGHS] Okay.
I'll head down there and see
if seeing this cute little face
- can't change his mind.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
[GUNFIRE ON TV]
What's the problem?
We're not supposed to have dogs.
Oh.
[SCREAMING ON TV]
How did he know, Patty?
Maybe he saw the
poop bags in your trash.
Why would he be going through our trash?
Oh, you know what?
Make sure you write that
last one down, by the way.
[GUNFIRE CONTINUES]
[CREATURE GRUNTS]
Hey. I was finishing that level.
We had Molly for seven years.
- So?
- And the landlord never knew.
Okay.
Never went through our trash,
never snooped through anything
because he never even
suspected we had a dog.
Well, you got lucky, then.
What did you do, Patty?
Oh, no. No, no, no. No. No.
Don't be ridiculous. No.
This is a whole new level even for you.
Look who's talking?
Is this how you thank me, hmm?
I have lost sleep.
I have gone above and
beyond just to help you out.
- It's not like you want to.
- It's just a dog, Alice.
Not to me.
You know what the crazy part is?
You don't want a
baby, but you are willing
to put in twice the
effort, twice the work,
just for some stupid pet.
She is way more than just a pet!
Oh, right, your generation
you put them in strollers.
You you bring them into restaurants.
You buy them seats on airplanes.
- She is my baby.
- She's an animal!
[SIGHS]
You know
I really thought you would
come to your senses after Molly.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
What is that supposed to mean?
As long as you have a dog,
I'll never have a grandchild.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
- [DOOR OPENS]
- Their fevers broke.
[GASPS] Oh. Oh, my God.
[GIGGLES] I I'm so sorry.
The door was unlocked.
- It's fine.
- I didn't see anything.
- I'll be out in a minute.
- I'm going. Take your time.
Oh, my God.
I am so sorry.
Well, it's not like you haven't seen
any of this before.
It's just the last couple
nights felt so normal.
Yeah, the kids, all
of us together again.
It's like I never left.
Well, I got a pretty good
handle on everything now, so
- Are you sure?
- Yeah, yeah.
No more fevers. Kids can
go back to school tomorrow.
W well, I should help you clean up.
Uh, this is cleaned up.
Oh, my God.
Connor would go crazy if
our kitchen looked like this.
You know he's gonna make you
quarantine when you get back home.
Oh, he's gonna make me sleep in the car.
[LAUGHS]
Um
he's not a good dude, Melissa.
You are.
[SIGHS] Uh
uh, it's totally cool if you want to go.
[DEARY'S "FAIRGROUND"]
What if I don't want to go?
Before the storm ♪
Hide in glass ♪
In glass ♪
- [PHONE VIBRATING]
- Oh, you should probably
- Yeah.
- Get that.
Sorry. Um
Hey, babe.
[SNIFFLES]
[BRITTLE STARS' "SOUVENIR"]
[SNIFFLES]
It's my direction ♪
It's my proposal ♪
It's so hard ♪
It's leading me astray ♪
My obsession is my creation ♪
You'll understand ♪
We might have to hire
someone for the attic.
I don't think we ever
threw anything away.
What was this?
Uh, Christmas Eve, maybe.
You look about nine.
I mean
the looks on your faces,
the smiles.
We were excited for Santa.
Was it all a lie?
Oh, honey.
How can you throw 40 years away?
It doesn't erase what
your mother and I had.
- Did you even try to fix it?
- Of course I did.
- Therapy, date nights.
- All of it, baby.
Tucker and I figured it out.
This isn't a rough patch.
It's the end of the road.
But how are you so sure?
The the glue,
the stuff that keeps you
together when you're younger
it just lost its bond as we got older.
But [SNIFFLES]
Nothing's ever gonna be perfect.
Let's be real.
I got more yesterdays than tomorrows.
- Dad, that's dark.
- [SIGHS]
I'm not looking for perfect, baby.
I just want to be happy.
Your mom, too.
[WHIMPERS]
I just wish there was
something I could have done.
None of this is your fault.
Ugh, that's what you're
supposed to tell your kids.
Because it's true.
But I don't want two Christmases.
Cathy, I'm giving you my Tupperware
'cause I noticed some
of your lids were stained.
Thanks, Mom.
Sweetheart, what happened?
Cathy's having big feelings.
It's so unfair.
How can they just jack
our rent up out of nowhere?
Um, they can when we
get a dog out of nowhere.
[GUNSHOTS AND SCREAMS ON TV]
The rescue said, um, we
can take her back anytime.
[SCOFFS]
I can't believe we're a home a
dog needs to be rescued from.
Well
maybe we'll win the
lottery and get her back.
How could someone in our building
have a problem with such a cute puppy?
Unless it's not someone in our building.
Okay, that makes even less sense.
It was just an anonymous phone call
to the rental company, right?
Yeah, so?
It could be anyone.
[GROANS SOFTLY]
- [SMOOCHING]
- Hey, puppy
And the worst part is,
it really felt like Gail
was my dog, too.
[GAIL WHINING]
Mm.
Just please don't get sucked
back into the gaming life again.
I just need to beat the high score,
then I'm throwing it away!
Aren't you already the highest score?
I was.
Then my mom beat me the other night.
Seriously?
Yeah.
Turns out she's a lucky shot.
[GUNFIRE ON TV]
Maybe it's not just luck.
[LAUGHS] Right.
I mean, she could just
really hate zombies.
[SCREAMING AND GUNFIRE ON TV]
[PLUCKY MUSIC]
Doug's dad gave him the gun,
which means Patty had access to it.
Okay.
Plus, she told me I'd
never give her a grandchild
- as long as I had a dog?
- Uh-huh.
And when you think of all the
insane things she has done,
shooting a dog
actually fits the profile.
Hmm.
She got rid of Gail.
Maybe she also got rid of Molly.
[MOUTH FULL] Am I being crazy?
- Yeah.
- 100.
But
it's a good crazy.
The last time I went down this road,
I got fired and almost divorced.
Yeah, but that was bonkers,
and we just couldn't tell you.
I cannot lose my mind
again over some wild hunch.
You don't have to.
What do you mean?
You still have the gun, right?
- Yeah.
- And the bullet?
- Mm-hmm.
- Then all we need is Tucker
to call his old FBI buddies,
and they'll run tests.
I don't know.
Don't you want to know the truth?
I'm not sure my
marriage could handle it.
But this shrimp toast is bussin'.
At least we found our chef.
- Hmm.
- Mm.
[GAGS, GROANS]
[NATION OF LANGUAGE'S "TOURNAMENT"]
And that's fine ♪
I'm wasting away ♪
I took the long road home ♪
And it never paid off for me ♪
[BILLIARD BALLS CLACKING]
As I'm walking around the city ♪
Let's make this quick.
So what do you got?
- Some real dirt on Brett.
- What'd he do?
Your wife.
'Cause I've been waiting
for a long, long time ♪
Watching ♪
I've been waiting
for a long, long time ♪
'Cause I've been waiting
for a long, long time ♪
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
Watching ♪
And I've been waiting
for a long, long time ♪
Long time ♪
[KNOCK AT DOOR]
[CHUCKLES]
- Hey.
- [SLIDING DOOR CLOSES]
Just wanted to make sure you didn't die.
[CHUCKLES]
Thanks for calling the ambulance.
Yeah. I, uh I followed
behind in your car.
That must have been traumatic.
- Made me want to try harder.
- Yeah.
These moments really show
us that life is short, right?
Actually, just made me
want to earn a fat stack
so I could buy a Porsche.
- Oh, okay.
- [BOTH CHUCKLE]
Glad something good came out of it.
So, are you
dying or something?
Oh, I just
need to stop mixing
booze and diet pills.
Okay.
[SIGHS]
What was my dad like?
Uh, you know that guy who's, like
super smart and
doesn't even have to try,
everyone wants to be like him?
I guess.
Your dad was the opposite.
So what? He's, like, a loser?
He never lived up to his potential.
But I have a feeling that you will.
Well, um
I'm really glad that you're not dead.
Oh, um
Can I ask how your other dad is doing?
He's not sleeping on the couch anymore.
Oh.
Good.
He left my mom.
[SOFT TENSE MUSIC]
So, yeah, everything has a season.
And even though you
know the next one's coming
You never quite know
how hard it's gonna hit.
[WALKIE-TALKIE BEEPS]
What's the ETA on the black Cadillac?
Everyone's trying to get out of here.
On it.
- What the hell are you doing?
- We got to talk, lady.
You do not want to be
alone with me right now.
I'll take my chances.
Your funeral.
Because let's face it,
Mother Nature's a bitch.
And then you die.
[ENGINE REVS]