Grown-ish (2018) s01e10 Episode Script

1 ZOEY: There is no question our generation is more open than any other generation that came before it.
And when it comes to dating, it's like we have an open-door policy.
That's right in our world, anybody can get it.
So back to what I was saying We've mixed things up so much that in 40 years, we're gonna have this planet looking like a bunch of Jesse Williams.
But it's not that easy for everybody.
Online dating sites like OkCupid and Tinder have proven that statistically, some groups are more selective than others.
So back to what I was saying This could be us, but you're playing While other groups well, they don't do as great.
[BUZZER RINGS.]
And no group gets less love than black women.
In fact, 82% of non-black men show some bias against black women.
Toss the money in the air, girl Watch how your dreams hit the floor Ain't this a bitch? Watch out, world, I'm grown now I'm grown Learn something new every day I don't know, so I'm-a feel my way Got the weight of the world on me But no regrets, this is what I say Watch out, world, I'm grown now - I'm grown - You can tell me My heart beating so loud Mama, look, I'm grown now I'm grown Ain't turnt up like me Nah, y'all ain't turnt up like me Ain't turnt up like me Okay, for real, is there something in the water around here? Was there some event, some movie, some Drake song that said black guys should stop dating black girls? Maybe it was those Wendy Williams vacation photos.
They were pretty devastating.
I'm just starting to think this shit is a problem.
- Come on.
- It's probably just a slow night.
- Yeah.
- No, it's a slow semester.
Facts.
In high school, dudes were always checkin' for us.
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, but didn't you go to like South Central High? I'm just saying that we're at a primarily white institution.
There's a much smaller pool of black guys here.
Yeah, and some of the pool are gay, most of the athletes like white girls, and we're left with very few options.
Who don't seem to be checkin' for us.
Oh, my God, are you guys telling me that you haven't had any action in six months? I mean, we've had some action.
These Firecracker Salmon rolls are on point tonight.
Yeah, this is a really good batch.
That doesn't make any sense.
LUCA: You know what else doesn't make any sense? How good the brown bread is.
Like, why do they even bring out the sourdough? Why don't you guys just try dating someone other than black guys? I mean, college is the place to open up and explore.
Yeah, I mean, Nomi's basically been through every Olympics-eligible country since she's been here.
[LAUGHS.]
Yeah, it's crazy.
Can you believe Canada is the hold-out? [LAUGHS.]
But why do I have to open up? Why should we have to change what we want? - I like what I like.
- Me too.
That's what I'm saying.
I mean, I'm all about black girls.
Don't take this wrong, Nomi, but there's no way I could, like, go there with you.
Mm.
Yeah.
And hey, Aaron, don't take this wrong, but I'd make you wear two condoms.
Okay.
Look, I just could never imagine not dating a Queen.
Word? That's how you feel? Yeah, that's how I feel.
But from the way you said that, I'm thinking that you feel differently? No, I know you love Queens when they're Egyptian, not Nubian.
You definitely have a type.
Type? Wait, those weren't all the same girl? - No.
- No.
I'm not colorstruck, guys.
Come on.
No, dead-ass, all your girls look like clones.
Shit is weird.
I don't have time for weirdos.
And I also don't have cash, so I'll pay you guys back in retweets.
You're welcome.
- Luca - Whoa, hold on, man.
- They're not all clones! - Not cool, Luca.
All right? All those girls just have mixed parents and their hair is long and curly and they have Oh, my God, am I am I colorstruck? SKY: All we're trying to say is, sometimes when we look around campus, it feels like we're really at the bottom of the list.
- There's a list? - There's no list.
BOTH: There's absolutely a list.
I heard about the list.
So after weeks of uncertainty from relationships and guy drama, I finally knew what I wanted to buckle down and focus on the things that matter in life pockets.
So, I was thinking for our collection, what if we took all of our pockets and sewed inspirational quotes on the inside? Like a fortune cookie? No.
Like a fortune pocket.
[LAUGHS.]
It's good having you back.
Thanks.
You know, you're the only person who didn't get mad at me or tell me I was crazy during the whole Cash thing.
It's all good.
No, it meant a lot.
It's all part of your journey.
I mean, everybody has one like that braided belt you keep trying to make work.
Wh Okay, I thought you liked it.
How could you think that? I mean, seriously, I don't know what I'm giving off for you to think I like that belt.
I might be sending the complete wrong signal to people and I don't even know.
You know what? You might be.
Not important.
What's important is this sweater.
I know, the sweater Um but do you want to hit "Black Panther" real quick? I want to hit this sweater.
Our collection is due.
Yeah, but the next showing's in 15 minutes.
We can make it if we leave now.
15? It's supposed to be fire.
And I heard Michael B.
Jordan wears his dreads to the side like I do.
Well, then I guess we have to see "who wore it best.
" Why you trying to hurt me? [DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
Okay, so white girls hold the top spot, but white girls with an accent are above them.
Exactly.
Your Kylie Jenners and Minka Kellys are number one.
But give them girls some broken English and they turn into Gal Gadot.
Mm, she is Wonder Woman for a reason.
Mm, she's bad.
Okay, then you have your exotic chicks.
Those are the girls who constantly get, "Girl, what are you mixed with?" Yeah, that's Karrueches, your Chrissy Teigens, and your Cassies.
What about the Latinas? Your Cubans.
Hello.
Your Brazilians, your Puerto Rocks Chill out, Rosetta Stone.
You and J.
Lo are way up there.
Okay, this is some BS, all right? This list that you're talking about does not speak for everyone.
I'd like to argue that pop culture says otherwise.
I mean, you have your athletes' wives, your rappers' girls, and all those A-list actors.
[DING!.]
I mean, what kind of message do you think that's sending? The message is we're not it.
You are for me.
Black women are at the top of my list.
There is nothing sexier than a strong, independent, confident woman.
That's why I'd take a Teyana Taylor or a Keke Palmer over a J.
Law any day.
Okay, Vivek.
Hey, how's your night going? Hey, what's good, mami? You down for a little Telemundo and chill? Uh Hey, DJ, rub it all night long Rub it all night long Hey, DJ, rub it all night long You get it now, right? The list doesn't lie.
I didn't put myself on the list though.
No, but your hips, your lips, and your ass did.
Everybody's always checking for the girl who looks black, but no one wants the girl who actually is.
Which is why everyone's suddenly getting lip injections and ass shots.
And wearing cornrows and rockin' Timbs.
Yeah, but do you know why it's like this? Have you ever asked one of these guys? No.
The fact that we would even have to ask is crazy.
It makes it seem like we're the problem.
Yeah, it's like Malcolm X said, "The most disrespected person in America is the black woman.
The most unprotected person in America is the black woman.
And the most neglected person in America is the black woman.
" [Bleep.]
hero.
Wait, but I put him down on Malcolm X.
I literally sent him that speech.
Uh-oh, Aaron's got that light-skinned look in his eye.
Huh? I've got a problem.
- Yeah.
[CHUCKLES.]
- [EXHALES DEEPLY.]
Tonight has been crazy.
First we hit up "Black Panther," then we went to the skate park.
Then we hit up the grocery store for eggs.
Then we egged the grocery store.
Finally.
- LUCA: What's up? - Hey.
[CAR BEEPS.]
Hey, Siri, give us directions back to campus.
[CAR BEEPS.]
Calculating route.
[CAR BEEPS.]
Siri, stop playing and take us to the nearest zoo.
- [CAR BEEPS.]
- Recalculating route.
What? Dude, no.
No more stops.
We haven't finished our project.
We have to go back.
Look, this is how I work.
You're not gonna get inspiration from sitting inside a classroom.
You'll get it from going outside and living.
So we'll go back after we hit "Dingos After Dark.
" [CAR BEEPS.]
- Siri, take us to San Diego.
- No Recalculating route.
Siri, it's me or him.
I don't understand.
You really want Siri to make that choice? [SIGHS.]
I don't.
She's obviously gonna choose you.
Can you please have her play Solange? Yeah, I got you.
Siri, play some Daft Punk.
Coming right up.
[CAR HORN BLARES.]
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS.]
Oh, hi.
Sorry.
This drink isn't right.
Okay.
What's wrong with it? It tastes funny.
Well, what are you looking for? A drink that doesn't taste funny.
Fine, I'll get you a new one.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS.]
- What? - Nothing.
Am I crazy for sending the drink back? You often send your drink back.
So, what, am I not supposed to get what I paid for? Okay, look, I'm just gonna say it.
We're all friends here, right? We can be honest with each other.
Do you think this might have something to do with the fact that black guys are Don't! No, no, Ana, it's fine.
We're all friends.
We're not that close.
You're about to insinuate that this is why black guys aren't checkin' for us, aren't you? See, normally I would call you a bitch right now, but since you're questioning my attitude, I will hold it.
And honestly, Nomi, no one returns more drinks than you.
[GAGS.]
Oh my God, taste that.
No, I'm serious, taste it.
I want to record your face so that I can show you what it looks like when you drink dog piss.
Well, it's like what Jazz said, I'm paying for a drink.
Should I not get what I paid for? Exactly.
But when you do it, it's how you act.
And when I do it, it's how black girls act.
Right.
We're difficult, sassy, full of attitude.
I mean, for me, you're basically rattling off a club sandwich.
What? I can't do the passive chick.
I see that with my mom and pops.
I need a little bit of danger.
Like, maybe I got to sleep with one eye open or wonder if she's gonna throw a toaster in the shower.
That is sexy as hell to me.
I'm sorry.
You just lost your hero status.
Yeah, where is Aaron? So Shukura? I'm saying that right? Mm-hmm.
Awesome.
Where are you from? Cameroon? Cameroon.
Dope.
Dope.
No, I've played them on FIFA.
Look, I get it.
I get hit with Jewish stereotypes all the time.
Like what? You're cheap? Whoa, that was that was quick.
Nomi, being called cheap is not going to stop somebody from trying to get to know you or be with you.
And how are we supposed to deal with that? You ready to work? Yeah, let's go.
Where is it? My vape pen? It's charging.
No, our project.
[LAUGHS.]
I trashed that.
What?! Why?! It was garbage.
I can't believe you did this.
Now we're gonna fail.
I didn't come to college to get good grades.
I actually don't know why I came to college, but I'm definitely not handing in anything I'm not feeling.
I am "not feeling" taking this class again.
I mean, like, what is this? You don't like it? Oh, no, it's it's great.
Great if you're gonna wrap a body.
I mean, it's old, it's itchy, and the color is uninspiring.
I know.
That's why it's fire.
I'm always gonna pick the things that people run away from and look for the things that people make assumptions about.
Then I make it as fire as I can, and that's what I call art, so [CELLPHONE CLICKING.]
[CELLPHONE PLAYING MUSIC.]
You hear this music? I know I dream about her all day I think about her with her clothes off It's too real.
I mean, that's what we need to show in our work.
The realness always need to bleed through everything.
I look for ways to say "I love you" But I ain't into making love songs Baby, I'm just rappin' to this LSD Another quarter to the face system Make no mistakes, it's all a leap of faith for love It takes a place in feelin' that you crave Doin' love, sex, dreams What's up, guys? Uh, this is Shukura.
She's from Cameroon.
Well, I actually grew up in Denver.
But she was born in Cameroon the motherland, okay? Birthplace of humanity.
Mama Africa.
You know what I'm talking about.
A UN member since 1960, right? Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Uh, where's Luca? Because he needs to see this.
Is he still here? He might still be here? Well, I'm gonna go get you a drink, but when I come back, can you guys take a picture of us and send it to Luca and make sure you hashtag "motherland.
" All right? Okay.
He's kidding, right? Yeah, baby girl, you know you got the look Baby girl, you know you got the moves Oh, my gosh.
You've got to be kidding me.
- Get out of here! - I'm telling you.
Stop wasting your time with "House of Cards" - and watch "Ozark.
" - Unh-unh! Okay, no, Jason Bateman is bullying people without a gun.
No way.
Really? Oh! Oh, hey! Chad, this is my sister, Sky.
- Sky, this is Chad.
- What's up, Sky? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
Can I talk to you for a second? Uh-huh.
So, this is the move now? You're about to start hooking up with white dudes? Well, I have no idea because you just interrupted when he was about to buy me a summer ale.
I don't even know what that is.
And I also don't know why you're trying to act like all of a sudden you're into white dudes when you weren't before.
Well, nobody cares when black guys do it, so I don't understand why you're coming at me for doing the same thing.
I'm just saying good luck bringing Chad home to Daddy.
Okay, what are you talking about? I just met him 10 minutes ago.
He offered to buy me a drink, and I'm sorry, but I'm tired of closing myself off from summer ales because I don't wanna keep buying my own mango Cîroc.
So, if you have a problem with this, you can go kick rocks.
Can I ask you a question? Um, okay? What's up with you and white girls? [LAUGHS.]
You serious? Yeah.
I've seen you around campus, and all I ever see you is with white girls.
I wanna know why.
Okay.
Because I can? [SCOFFS.]
Wow.
Party girl Come on and move it, party girl Come on out dancing, party girl You feelin' it? Now that's real.
God.
I hate it when he's right and that he took my braided belt and made it work.
So I owe you an apology.
For what? Well, you were right.
Hm, that usually happens.
[SCOFFS.]
No, seriously.
I mean, if it were up to me, I would've turned in our old collection, but you pushed us to do better.
That's the thing about you.
Every single time I think I've got it figured out and I know what I want, you help me realize that I don't.
Bet.
I think we have something here.
We definitely have something here.
You, you, you, you Oh, you for you What? No Chad? You're probably gonna think I'm trying to be funny, but, uh he has a 6:00 a.
m.
rock-climbing class he has to get up for, so I'd be worried if he didn't.
[STIFLED LAUGHTER.]
[SIGHS.]
I'm sorry I came at you like that.
I shouldn't have said all that stuff.
Nobody on campus is gonna care if you're a black girl dating a white guy.
It's just I only wanted you to do it because you wanted to.
Not because you're settling.
I don't know what I want.
Actually, no, that's not true.
What I want is to have the same college experience as Ana or Nomi.
I get it.
I didn't know it'd be like this here.
[CHUCKLES.]
But if we were going to college just to meet guys, we would've gone to Howard or Clark.
Mm.
This is one experience a jacked-up experience, but only one.
Yeah.
Don't let it define us.
Come here.
Whenever you're ready Whenever you're ready Whenever you're ready Whenever you're ready Hey, can I talk to you? Why? Is there a white girl behind us? [CHUCKLES.]
You got jokes.
Look, I've been thinking about what you asked me last night, and here's the deal we're in college, and I'm single.
It's not that deep.
White girls holla at me.
Mexican girls holla at me.
We kick it sometimes.
How is that better than "Because I can"? I mean, what was I supposed to say? Hold on one second.
All of it caught me off guard.
I'm in my bag, got a couple drinks.
They just played "Mask Off" for the third time.
And then you come in through with the interrogation.
Yeah, that's my sister face of an angel, heart of an MS-13.
Yeah, I can see she has that gear in her.
Look, I don't want her or you or anyone thinking I don't like black girls 'cause that's just not the real.
I don't know where y'all from, but I'm from Queens.
When I came here, it was a whole new world.
Everybody's so open, so I figured I'd do the same.
Yeah, that's what I keep telling her.
It's not so bad to open up.
Yeah.
I'm Doug, by the way.
I'm Jazz.
I'ma go to class.
Take good notes, girl.
So, Doug, you don't happen to rock climb, do you? Nah, these are Air Max 97s.
I see.
- I can't do that with these.
- I feel you.
Dude, I hate to admit it, but Luca was right.
I have a clear preference for light-skinned girls.
I This is not a good look.
Whoa.
Who's that? She is by far the star of the show.
Dude, fall back.
That's my mom.
Okay? Yo, wait a minute.
Huh? What? What? You don't have a thing for light-skinned girls.
You have a thing for your mom.
Huh? So, is your dad still in the picture or