Jonas L.A. (2010) s01e10 Episode Script

- Previously on " Jonas L.
A.
" - Guys, where are you? - We're right here.
- Sounds great, man.
No, it doesn't because it's missing something-- Like the rest of the band.
I got it! - You got what? - The lyrics for the song.
I never thought I would feel it.
We live in different worlds.
I mean, you're here five minutes And you're already hugging vanessa page? Rock stars care about two things: Themselves and their hair.
Is this what you guys do all day-- sit around and eat junk food? I'm actually starring in a movie.
Wait, are you guys starring in a movie too? I forget.
No, we're all just extras in "the joe show.
" - Ugh.
- Cool, pancakes.
No, don't! Stella's aunt lisa made them-- they taste like feet.
They can't be that bad.
I've never tried a foot before, but - That is a foot.
- Yeah.
- So you like them? - Delicious, aunt lisa.
- Mmm.
- It's the pickled bean paste.
I'm gonna make some for stella and macy.
See you boys.
Bye.
Lock the doors.
You are never gonna Mantra wants to meet with me for our next album.
Dude, he's like the greatest music producer ever-- - Stones, peas, j.
T.
- Yeah, everything he touches turns to gold.
- I wish he'd touch those pancakes.
- You want to eat gold pancakes? No, I want to sell them and get good pancakes.
Here we go! Whoo! - ( crashes ) oh oh! - What was that? - What are you doing? - Practicing my flips.
I gotta get back in shape for the tour.
You didn't quite stick the landing.
It's a good thing big man's petunias cushioned your fall.
Yeah, laugh it up now, brother, but I'm gonna get my flip back And you'll see-- all the fans will love me the most.
You gonna clean this up? No? yeah! hey! I was sitting at home ♪ watching tv all alone ♪ ♪ so tired of routines ♪ the day goes on and on so I pick up the phone call everyone I know I say there's gonna be a party hit the music, here we go, yeah you gotta live to party, bust your move everybody's in the groove tell the d.
J.
To play our song are you ready to rock and roll? gotta live to party, bust your move everybody's in the groove live to party! - Ooh, that's cute.
- Yeah.
Hey, ladies.
Guess what I'm doing today.
- Getting interviewed by movie brat.
- I am getting interviewed by-- Wait.
How did you know that? - It was already on her blog.
- Oh.
Whatever's going on in hollywood, movie brat's on it.
She's kind of my idol.
Well, mona set it up for me.
I'm supposed to get movie brat excited about "forever April.
" Well, the brat's tough.
If she doesn't like you, She could trash you and your movie.
Well, I guess I'll just have to turn on the charm, right? Oh, so it's just that easy, huh? Sometimes even easier.
Wow, how does such a scrawny neck hold such a big head? Stells, stellarooni, I guarantee movie brat will be putty in my hands.
And I don't have a scrawny neck.
Joe, not every girl in the world Finds this charming.
Really? Because if I recall correctly, you found this Pretty awesome.
And this is why this Went like this-- poof.
Okay.
There's the famous kevin backflip.
I'm a little rusty, so thanks for training me, big man.
Yeah, thanks for crushing my petunias.
- And I'm sorry about that.
- Accidents happen.
Let's get to work.
If I'm gonna get my flip back, you're gonna have to push me.
- Done.
- That means no matter how much I beg and plead, - You don't stop.
- Not a problem.
All right, what's first? Balance, agility-- oh, strength.
- Medicine ball.
- What? Oh! got it! Because no one else is here.
Well, hello there.
You must be the famous movie brat.
Jessica.
One sec, just updating my blog.
Jessica, what are you typing? "standing at joe's door, Updating my blog.
" - Wow, you are really on top of things.
- I know.
My readers demand it.
You know, I've been to your website, And I must say, your avatar does not do you justice.
What are you typing now? Um, "joe is so cute.
Waiting for him to invite me in.
" Right, sorry.
This way, milady.
- please don't type that.
That was kinda lame.
- No, I thought it was charming.
- Oh, then keep typing, milady.
heh heh.
- How do I look? - Aw, I think you look adorable.
Okay, adorable's not the goal here.
I'm meeting with mantra today.
I need to look cool.
- You know, rock and roll.
- You can be all that and adorable.
Come on, mace.
Mantra could take our band to the next level.
- Of adorability? - Seriously.
Nick, mantra called you, okay? He's already sold.
So just go on with your old bad self.
You're the best.
Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
- Are you sure I look all right? Nick, trust me, the last thing mantra's going to care about is your shirt.
- Nick! Mantra.
- Pleasure.
Ew, that shirt-- it's disrupting my groove.
- Oh, it's too adorable, I knew it.
- No need to apologize.
Be a good jonas and pop this on.
Huh.
All right, a sleeve at a time.
Nick, I'm ready to receive your music.
- Here you go.
- A compacted disc! Perfection.
- Actually that's not meant to be a coaster.
- Let me hear your song.
I don't know how to play this.
Then let it play you.
no more! All right.
Just a tiny bit.
Right out of the gate.
Ah yes! Cool, nick.
Can't play it-- please.
Oh, I'm weakened.
Sounds like you've had an incredible summer, joe.
Yeah, it's been amazing.
I'm actually starring in "forever April," - Directed by the great mona klein.
- Mona-- how is she? Did she ever recover after I shredded that awful movie of hers? - What was it called? It was like-- - "soccer squirrels 2"? "nuts in new york.
" You know, I never would have had to destroy her film If she hadn't snubbed me at that premiere.
Glad she finally learned how this game is played.
Wow, you're kinda scary.
But in a fun way-- like Halloween.
Oh, this is good right here.
Sit! - There.
- Okay.
Perfect.
- So about "forever April"-- - uh, later.
First we're gonna do the good stuff-- you and vanessa page.
Are just costars and friends.
Because you just broke up with her.
How did you know that? I have an army of brats all over this town, joe.
- Wow, you are good.
- And you are single.
Okay, so about "forever April.
" What kind of girls do you like? Girls that can't wait to see "forever April.
" I can't wait to see "forever April.
" Great, then I guess you're my type.
Can I get a picture of you? For the website? Sure.
Say "forever April"! With a big smile, joe, lots of teeth.
"forever April.
" my glutes are on fire.
- Can we take a break? - No! - But I'm in pain.
- So are my petunias.
So how was movie brat? Did she chew you up and spit you out? Please.
Piece of cake.
Oh really? Well, let's have a looky-loo.
My nana always says that.
I love my nana.
So the joe charm actually worked, huh? Told ya-- putty.
Oh wow, okay, she really loves you.
- I know.
- No no no.
I mean she loves you-- As in the two of you are in love.
Whoa, what? Boyfriend? No no no, this isn't funny.
Really? 'cause I think it's "putty" hilarious.
If I didn't say it it was just gonna say itself.
Well, if I'm her "boyfriend" I'll just call her up and break up with her.
Yeah, great idea, joe.
Then with a few keystrokes She can destroy "forever April" and your acting career.
- Jessica wouldn't do that.
- Oh right.
'cause telling the world you're a couple after just meeting-- totally normal.
Movie brat update-- oh, you have a new nickname.
You're now her joeypoo.
Joeypoo.
Stop it! This is your fault.
What? How is this my fault? You're the one who said not every girl would find this charming.
- So? - You got in my head! You made me overflirt.
Oh well, I'm sorry.
As far as I'm concerned, if you overflirt, You totally deserve this.
Oh no! She wants to go out at 6:00.
- What do I do? - You can't dump her.
So the way I see it, you have to get her to dump you.
- Come on, seriously? - Oh fine, you're on your own.
Wait wait wait.
Just tell me what to do.
Oh, that's the right attitude Joeypoo.
I'm sorry.
- Can we just-- - shh! We're nearly there.
And we're there.
- How do you feel? - Awesome.
You're right, mantra.
Staring at each other silently for an hour is very cleansing.
- It's like a loofah for the mind.
- Totally.
- So when do we get to the music? - Right.
Paint it for me.
Okay, I totally respect your process, but how do you paint a song? Ha ha, nick.
I remember when jagger asked me that very same question.
- As did timberlake.
- And what'd you tell them? Well, I think the chart-topping number-one songs I recorded for them provided the answer.
Got it.
Uh, do you have a smock? A smock? Never mind.
Feeling good-- make that great! Ready to flip.
Whoo! - Nice try.
- Okay, I know I told you not to let me stop, - But I have got to stop.
- Keep rolling! - I have to go to the bathroom! - I'll give you one minute.
- But I have to roll back to the house.
- 55 seconds.
Oh my god.
ow.
Okay, jessica's going to be here any minute.
- What's the plan? - Macy and I are going to watch Everything that goes on from this table.
- How is that going to help her dump me? - It doesn't.
We're just nosy.
- Plus they have killer garlic fries.
- Yeah.
Guys, come on, I need your help here.
Joe, we're just messing with you.
Okay, so here's the plan: You're gonna tell her that If you're going to be a couple, she needs to know all of your flaws.
- Every single one of them.
- And when she hears them, She'll drop you like a hot tamale-- although they're really good here too.
Perfect.
So I just have to make up some flaws and then she'll break up with me.
- Please tell me you're joking.
- No.
Why? Okay, let me help you out there, joe.
You're afraid of commitment.
You're a hopeless flirt.
You can't make a decision or express your feelings.
And to top it all off, you have an ego the size of montana.
Wow, you came up with those fast.
- You forgot oblivious.
- That too.
the brat is here.
- How do you know? - Because her blog says she's walking in right now.
- Jessica.
- Joeypoo! Oh ow, all right, you can let go now.
Oh no thank you, honey.
- Okay, our table's right over there.
- Okay.
Wow, you're very strong.
And sometimes I'm oblivious.
Joe, I had no idea it was so tough being a rock star's girlfriend.
I know.
I bet you're reconsidering this whole thing.
No, just the opposite.
Your honesty has made me feel closer to you.
Wow! What a grip you got there.
I know.
It's from all the texting.
I can crack a brazil nut with my bare hand.
Don't you think this is moving a little fast? Oh no, joe! Last year I was a dork with braces Blogging from my bedroom and look at me now! I'm fabulous! I can make or break careers.
My boyfriend is a rock star! wow.
Will you excuse me? Lots of ice tea.
A tiny tank-- another strike against joe.
"tiny tank," hmmm.
- Hey there, tiny tank.
- She blogged that already? This is a disaster.
None of those flaws you made up are working.
Joe, I didn't make those up.
Wait, so All of those things you said about me you meant? Well-- You'd better get back over there, buddy.
Apparently you're having thanksgiving at her parents' in el segundo.
This is the worst day ever.
I think I really hurt his feelings.
Well, luckily for you he can't express them.
No, seriously, mace, have I been crazy mean to him today? He kind of deserved it at first, But you really went to town with him on that one.
- How do we get him out of this? - Well, there's one way, But you're not gonna like it.
- Pull! - Oh, come on.
- Faster! - I can do it.
- Giddy up, rudolf.
- Ahhh! There we go! - Yes yes! - You go go! - Ah! - Mush mush mush mush.
So anyway, I was thinking that we could do thanksgiving with my mom And christmas with my dad and new year's with your family.
Are you okay, joeypoo-poo-poo? Yeah, just something somebody said to me earlier.
- I was thinking about it.
- You're so deep.
- I love guys who sing.
- Joe.
- There you are.
- Uhhh - Am I supposed to know who you are? - Play along.
Stella, hey! - This is jessica, stella.
- Hi.
Movie brat, I know.
I follow your blog And I saw that you and joe are kind of together.
"kind of together"? Try "soulmates forever.
" Yeah.
Well, jessica-- Ms.
Brat, The thing is you just met joe.
And I've known him my whole life.
And the truth is, joe I love you.
Joe, do you feel the same way? I totally do.
Unbelievable.
Are you mad? No, joe! And ladyperson.
My blog brought the two of you together.
I am that powerful.
joe, I am really gonna miss you.
I mean, what we had-- Whoa! Zac efron is giving me an exclusive! I gotta run.
Lates.
- So? - So.
- Hey, so it worked? - Yeah, it totally worked.
She bought it.
- wait, that whole thing was an act? My idea.
Can I get a woot woot? So real flaws, fake love-- got it.
- I gotta go.
- Oh joe, no, stay.
I mean let's celebrate.
You're a free man.
Mm-hmm.
I'll see you guys at home.
Dude! What's with tiny tank? What's with you? You want to know the weirdest part about pretending to like joe again? - What? - I kinda started to like joe again.
You almost got me.
You're not acting right now, are you? Oh boy.
there's a storm coming up and I've gotta prepare myself this feeling's getting stronger every day something's creeping inside everything is about to change gotta face the fact that I can't walk away and this is critical I am feeling helpless so hysterical and it can't be healthy I can't eat or sleep when you're not with me baby, you're the air I breathe and this is critical yeah so stuck on you.
I dig the song, man.
The one I just played? No, the one you just painted.
The chorus needs a bit of work, But I'm grooving on the verse.
- Yeah, I used a lot of purple.
- Yeah, purple.
Now a final question, young nick, Tell me, if I was to eat your song for dinner-- Okay, mantra, I would really like to work with you, But we're just not on the same wavelength here.
Whoa, claws in, kittycat.
I know you don't see it, but there's a method to my madness.
Plus I need a new painting For my bathroom.
- So are you saying you want to work together? - I am.
- And I am.
- Awesome, I'll call the guys.
Oh no no, nick, I'm not interested in working with your brothers, just you.
- What? - There's something inside of you, A solo voice that needs to be heard.
But we've always been a band.
Always only goes up till now.
It's time to go it alone, nick.
Are you ready? Nice flowers, big man.
I love my petunias.
Hey, bro, how's your day going? Well, I had lunch, got a crazy girlfriend, Made holiday plans, broke up with her-- oh, and I just Found out how stella really feels about me.
Good times.
Sorry, bro.
Are you doing all right? Well, I would talk about it, but apparently I'm bad at expressing my feelings.
How was your day with mantra? Oh you know.
I just did some painting, Stared, played the flute-- same old, same old.
Hey, guys.
Just took a hot bath.
- Kev, you really need a hobby.
- Funny.
The point is all my soreness went away.
All that's left is strength-- - Hamster-ball strength.
- Hey, guys, I just read Something online.
Is it movie brat? Did she trash my movie? - Mona's gonna kill me.
- No no, you're fine.
She actually said that - "forever April"'s going to be the movie event of the year.
- Awesome.
Dude, at least something good happened today.
Well, the thing is-- and I know this can't be true, but the fans are going crazy-- She posted something about you.
Me? What'd she say? According to movie brat, you're going solo.
Jonas is breaking up.
Next on "jonas l.
A.
" - Oh, come on man.
- David henrie-- to what do I owe this displeasure? I challenge you to a challenge for my new reality show.
It's called "david henrie's celebrity beach challenge.
" Morning, joe.
You know what? I'm over it.
- Wow, we really need to-- - do something.
This is just what you need, bro.
Oh, look who's here.
So all aboard? - I'm outta here.
- Later, dude.
Stella