Loot (2022) s01e10 Episode Script

1
- What terminal?
- Four.
International. Nice. Where you off to?
Corsica.
It's an island in the Mediterranean.
Wow, that sounds nice. You ever been?
No. I haven't traveled in a while.
My last vacation was in Fresno.
I went to a police brutality protest there.
And a garlic festival.
Wow. Sounds like a hell of a trip.
Ugh. These homeless tents
are just everywhere now.
Yeah. We could be doing better
for our unhoused population.
You ask me, we should just call a bulldozer
and sweep 'em all up.
Well, that's not really a solution.
We can't criminalize poverty.
I don't really see any other way
of fixing this.
Oh, there are ways to help.
Structural change.
There's a lot of work being put into
Yeah, I heard all that shit.
That shit doesn't really work.
I think those people need to
get off their asses and get a job.
- Okay. Mm Pull over.
- What?
I have a lifelong policy
that if someone says "those people,"
I end the conversation. So, thank you.
You have a nice day.
You j just gonna get out here,
in the middle of…
Oh
Welcome to Corsica, everyone!
Oh, I missed you guys.
Isn't it gorgeous here?
They have horseback riding, scuba diving,
the most beautiful beaches.
Although, I did check,
there are no nude beaches,
unfortunately, Rhonda.
You did bring your bathing suit, right?
Oh, yes, of course, dear.
It's flesh-colored.
- She's lying. She didn't pack one.
- I didn't.
All right.
Everyone, keep an eye on Rhonda, please.
Now, enjoy some mirto.
It's a Corsican liqueur made from berries.
- Can I talk to you for a second?
- Oh, yeah.
I just want to say again
how sorry I am for missing your play.
Uh, don't worry about it. It's stupid.
It was terrible.
I don't even know
why I got three curtain calls.
You're not mad, are you? You promise?
How can I ever be mad at you?
You're you, you know.
You're my boss, my mom,
my American Girl doll,
all wrapped up into one.
We have a very healthy relationship.
Aw.
I'm so glad. Cheers.
Yeah. Um.
I'm gonna go and claim my room,
just flip on some Anderson Cooper,
sit there in the dark
and watch it for 45 minutes.
You know, just get over the jet lag.
- It's pretty cool here, huh?
- It's something.
Uh, what time is the run-through
for the water presentation?
- I just have a few concerns about
- Sofia. Come on!
You have got to relax.
You're on island time now, man.
That was Jamaican, wasn't it? Wrong country.
Yes. If we're being problematic, you
should probably get your geography right.
- Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
- Okay, it's okay. Cheers.
Mmm. This is wonderful.
Great atmosphere, great company,
great food and drinks.
Mm-hmm.
Y'all know what this "proscuttio"
tastes like?
Freedom.
Cheers to Howard
for finally being free of Tanya.
I know she took the tires off your Corolla,
but breakups can be messy.
All good.
Walking more, better for my heart health.
You know, while we're on the subject,
I actually ended things with Chelsea too.
- What Why?
- Why would you do that?
I don't know. Similar reasons.
For For freedom.
No, that does not apply to you.
Yeah, we're talking about Chelsea here.
She's smart and cool,
and you are the living embodiment
of an Olive Garden bread stick.
- What happened?
- Well, nothing, really.
There just, you know,
wasn't a love connection.
You know, we weren't, uh, simpatico.
Not the right puzzle pieces. You know?
No "Yahtzee."
You are low-key
the weirdest dude I've ever met.
Yeah, you're being so vague
and withholding right now,
I'm, like, 5% attracted to you.
You know what I think?
I think we're wasting time
just sitting around here gabbing.
There is a whole beautiful island
out there waiting to be discovered.
Carpe diem! Am I right, fellas?
But… we got all these meats.
Well, we should probably go after him.
White people are very attracted
to waterfalls,
and I don't want him to fall.
Wow.
This machine is actually
kind of beautiful up close.
Should I be jealous
you've been spending so much time with it?
No. Nothing to worry about.
Hey, guys!
Why don't we test the lights on Molly
for her introduction?
Oh, wow, look at that. Is that for me?
Wow, I feel like a star.
Okay, I was actually wondering,
what if I came from this side?
Can I audition that?
So, I'm walking. "Hi, hi, how are you?"
And then I say, "Welcome, everybody,
to the future of water."
That feels pretty good, actually.
What do you think, Sofia?
Should I come
from stage left or stage right?
- Both seem fine to me. Doesn't matter.
- Yeah?
And I'm gonna have
a gold feature in my dress.
Will that affect my lighting?
God, this light is really fun.
It follows you wherever you go.
I'm loving this.
I should get
one of these lights in my house.
Ooh, for the karaoke room!
Wouldn't that be fun, Sofia?
Where'd she go?
Wow.
Look at this place.
- Isn't it spectacular?
- Yeah, I don't know.
I just kind of feel like
I'm in someone's backyard right now.
Is it leading us to something cool?
Like a ancient temple we can zip-line into?
Guys, this is one of the most unique
botanical gardens on Earth.
There are 47 species of plants
only native to Corsica.
Just look at the flowers. Look at the birds.
Oh, my God. You guys, look at that one.
You mean that tiny brown bird
that looks like every other bird
I've ever seen in my life?
Yeah.
To me, it's not boring.
Not at all.
To me, it's perfect.
Are you crying?
No.
No, I'm just…
Admiring this
This small creature's simple beauty.
Oop There he goes. He flew away.
Gone forever.
I am so uncomfortable right now.
What do we do? Do we just go home?
Do we Do we go back to America?
Whoo! All right!
That was cool as hell. Am I right, guys?
Wow!
All right. What are we doing next, huh?
What's next on the old cal-cal?
Oh, my God, come on.
There's 27 more acres back here.
Okay, I officially don't feel safe.
Hey! I was looking for you.
I wanted to run some of my speech by you.
I'm sure
whatever you're going to say is fine.
It seems like you got this.
Okay, now I know something's up,
because you're always very afraid
of what I'm going to say.
What is going on?
You really wanna know?
- I don't think you should do this.
- What?
Don't do this presentation tomorrow.
Make up an excuse, pack up and go home.
There's plenty of work for us there.
LA still needs our help.
But this isn't helping people.
It's just some weird sales pitch
to God knows who.
Why are we talking about lighting
and the color of your dress?
Listen, maybe this sort of thing isn't
in your comfort zone,
but if you try to have a little vision
Sorry, whose vision
are we talking about, exactly?
Do you think this is yours?
What's that supposed to mean?
When you first walked into my office,
you told me you wasted 20 years
getting swept up
in the life of a man you were with.
Well, where I'm standing right now,
it looks a lot like that's happening again.
Well, I'm sorry I tried
to find a little happiness with a guy.
I'm not surprised you're judging me though,
because nothing I do
will ever be good enough in your eyes.
You have never liked me,
and I am always going to be
a problem for you.
We should just stop pretending
that that's ever gonna change.
You know what? Maybe you're right.
I am. It's going to go great tomorrow,
and I don't need your permission
to do anything,
because it's my money!
That's true.
You'll always be the one with the money.
So, ultimately,
who cares what I think, right?
You go on and enjoy that.
Look at the three of us!
Three cowboys on the prowl.
Well, we haven't even taken a step yet.
You guys have probably
never even ridden a horse before, huh?
Now, why would you assume that?
No reason.
No, I wa I didn't No, I I
You know I grew up on a farm, right?
I've been riding horses for a while.
My family's horse was actually the only
one who ever showed me any affection.
Juanita.
We celebrated my eighth birthday together.
The theme was "Broadway or bust."
Oh, my God.
Well, if that is true,
then you just might be able to keep up
with this cowboy right here.
I'll race you to those rocks over there.
Hyah!
- O-Oh!
- What the fuck?
Is it dislocated? It feels dislocated.
Just pop it back in.
- Someone give me a stick to bite down on.
- Sir, it's not dislocated.
No broken bones. You'll be fine.
Okay. Thank you.
You okay, Arthur?
Yeah, thanks. It's just
When I fell off that horse,
it felt like my whole life
was flashing before my eyes.
I knew I shouldn't have come.
All this natural beauty
just highlighting the irony
of the darkness that I feel inside of me.
Arthur, what the hell is going on?
You've been weird this whole trip.
You sound like a goth teenager right now.
Yeah, seriously,
stop talking in Billie Eilish lyrics,
and just tell us what's happening.
I'm in love with Molly, okay?
I'm in love with Molly,
and I don't know what to do.
Hey. Where did you go?
Is everything all right?
Yeah. Everything's fine.
It all looks good, I just
I need to go work on my speech.
That's why I've been acting this way.
That's why I broke up with Chelsea.
I kept comparing her to Molly,
and it just wasn't fair to her.
Oh, man. I'm sorry, Arthur.
Yeah, that s-sounds like a lot to deal with.
It's just embarrassing, you know?
She's with some incredibly handsome
French billionaire
who owns multiple casinos.
A big part of my life is
using Bed Bath & Beyond coupons.
They never expire.
Look, it's not that embarrassing.
You two definitely have
some type of old-people vibe going on.
- I've seen it.
- Yeah, me too.
Honestly, I can't believe I'm saying this,
but I don't necessarily think that
Jean-Pierre is the best guy for Molly.
I think he's kind of a bad influence.
Are you guys saying
you think I might have a chance?
I mean, I don't know about that,
but I do think that a guy like you,
who's decent and kind and grounded,
could be really good for Molly.
Okay, that is so nice.
Later, I'm gonna need you to list
my good qualities.
It feels really good to talk about this.
I think my cat
was getting tired of hearing about it.
Well, if I can give you some advice,
as a guy who is just now living his truth,
you can't keep these things bottled up.
You gotta let your heart sing.
Yeah. And if I can give you advice,
as someone who's been bravely living
their truth since before it was cool,
it's the only way
you're ever gonna feel better.
Thank you, guys. That's good advice.
No problem.
Now, can we circle back
and address that whole
"horse birthday party" situation?
Okay, fine. But I am skipping over the
part where I had to shoot her in the head.
Oh, my God in heaven.
We all need so many hugs.
So what we are talking about here
is not just a step forward.
It's a revolution,
unlike anything ever attempted before.
Now I'm honored to introduce
the wonderful, generous…
…beautiful Ms. Molly Wells.
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you so much.
There's a reason we had him give
most of the presentation.
Everything sounds good in that accent,
am I right?
But we'd like to welcome
a very special surprise guest now
to join us for the demonstration portion.
Rapper, actor, multimedia superstar,
GaTa! GaTa, everyone!
What? Okay!
Oh.
What's up, Corsica?
Can y'all make some more noise
for my girl Molly?
Thank you.
Well, I know you're performing
a song for us later today.
Have you been staying hydrated,
keeping that throat ready?
Actually, I could use a glass of water.
Well, you're in luck.
The Arroyo is about to deliver us
two glasses of fresh,
clean, delicious water.
And it's going to make that happen
using this.
Should I pour it in, guys?
- Let's do it!
- Yeah? All right.
The Arroyo works within seconds!
It combines a thermal drying process
with reverse osmosis purification.
And not only that,
it produces electricity at the same time.
All right.
You ready to see this thing in action?
- I'm ready.
- Here we go.
Okay. Dr um roll, please.
Okay. That doesn't seem right.
Um, you guys
You guys turned the machine on, right?
Yeah? And it And it's working? Really?
Um, well, I am being told
the color is not a problem.
- It's still clean and perfectly safe.
- Clean?
So, here we go. Cheers.
- What is this?
- Just drink it, please.
- We spent three billion on this thing.
- I don't want to.
I'll double whatever we're paying you.
There's no way I'm drinking this.
I don't think you should either.
Okay. Great.
I'll go first, solo style.
And here we go. Down the hatch.
The drinking is about to begin.
In just a moment.
With me drinking it.
In my mouth.
Oh, God, I don't think I can watch this.
Cousin Molly, stop!
That shit's murky as hell!
Mmm.
It's, uh,
it's not… bad.
Feels like, um,
drinking directly from a river.
Oh, I am so glad there's
over half a glass left to enjoy.
Oh, God!
And it's done!
Look out, Evian.
I gotta go, everyone.
Fuck!
A disaster at the Silver Moon
philanthropic conference earlier today.
The country's third-richest woman,
Molly Wells,
was seen onstage
drinking clearly tainted water
produced by a filtration machine
she's poured billions of dollars
into designing.
What a black eye
for Molly Wells
and all these billionaire philanthropists.
- She was up onstage drinking human waste!
- Yeah!
Ugh.
This is bad. Really bad.
How are you feeling?
I mean, not great.
What happened out there?
I don't know. They are checking the machine.
Obviously, something didn't work
as well as we thought.
No shit.
What are we going to do now?
We look like idiots.
You and I have to go away.
Go away? Where?
I have a chalet in Switzerland.
It's very private.
What about all the promises we made?
Those people will still be there
in a few years.
Do you have a better idea?
Has anybody seen Molly?
No, and I'm getting kinda worried.
I've looked for her everywhere,
and she's
She's not answering any of my texts.
I couldn't find her anywhere either, but…
…I got this note sent to my room.
"Dear Wells Foundation,
Since the day I walked through your door,
all I've done is make your lives harder.
That's why I've decided to completely
step away from the foundation.
You'll always have my money
to keep doing amazing, meaningful work.
I'm honored to have my name on the door.
"Molly."
She quit?
That's what it sounds like to me.
Damn, coz.
So, what do we do now?
I think we should pack up and go home.
Like she said, we get back to work.
There's plenty to do, right?
I hope you're seated comfortably, Ms. Wells.
We will be departing Corsica
in approximately 15 minutes.
Ms. Wells, can I get you anything
before we take off?
I'll just have a ginger ale, please.
My stomach's still not feeling quite right.
Thank you.
Sofia?
I'm not opening that for you, by the way.
Where's Jean-Pierre?
I broke up with him.
He wasn't exactly
the person I thought he was.
What are you doing here?
I'm here because I have
a key chain I won at Dave & Buster's
because you made us all go there
after the award show.
I'm here because I started using
mineral sunscreen after going to your spa.
Me, Rhonda and Ainsley all use it now.
I'm here because of the night
we went to Lucy's when you first started.
Look, I've worked here for seven years,
but that was the first night I actually
started getting to know our team,
thanks to you.
That was a good night.
You know how big of a part of me
wants to hate you, Molly?
But I can't. I like you, and we need you.
You pulled us together,
and you made us better.
I may know more
about this world's problems than you,
but you know people.
Thank you for saying that.
You don't know how much that means to me.
I do not accept your resignation.
We need you back.
I can't do this without you.
- I think I'm gonna cry.
- Don't do that.
Because if you cry, then I'll cry,
and we do not want that.
I've had dreams
where we actually cry together,
and it's really beautiful.
I think if we just tried it now
- No, we're not doing that.
- Okay.
But I'm glad we had this talk.
Yeah.
Are you sure about this?
I mean, I'll never have
the moral compass you have.
You're not the problem, Molly.
The money is the problem. Look at this shit.
It makes people crazy.
It makes them think that they're geniuses
who get to tell everyone else how to live.
You don't have to be like that.
- But how do we come back from this?
- I don't know.
It's not an easy fix.
What are you thinking about?
What if we changed the story?
We're calling them "intuitive shelters."
They self-react to the weather.
Heat themselves in the winter,
cool themselves in the summer.
It's like you're living inside an app.
Hi. Sorry I'm late. I got held up.
Wow, uh, hi.
Let's give a round of applause
for Molly Wells.
Thank you.
Hi.
A little surprised to see you
a-after yesterday's, uh
Yesterday's huge fuck up.
Let's call it what it is.
It's okay. I'm fine.
Um, if you don't mind,
I would like to speak about everything else
that's going on here this weekend?
- Sure. The floor is yours.
- Thank you.
We've heard a lot
about magic water machines and robot houses,
but these aren't solutions.
They're distractions.
I mean, look at who's onstage right now.
It's me and two other billionaires.
If you think about it,
we're probably the worst people
to be talking about changing the world.
I mean, why would we wanna change
a system that lets us live like kings?
That's why we have these stupid conferences
where all we do is talk to each other.
If we actually stopped to listen to someone
who wasn't in our bubble,
they'd tell us that we are the problem.
Billionaires shouldn't exist.
I shouldn't exist.
I'm grateful
that I've gotten to know a few people
who have been telling me this
for a while now.
And…
I think I'm finally starting to hear them.
So starting today,
I'm going to give away all my money.
All 120 billion.
- Remember when I had 87 billion?
- Well… …it grew.
Just now while I've been talking to you
I-I've probably made about 20 million?
How fucking sick is that?
Anyway, I-I know I'm definitely gonna
screw some things up along the way.
But I promise to do my best to get to zero
and to help as many people as I can.
And I challenge any other ridiculously
wealthy people who are watching this
to do the same.
'Cause otherwise, it's not philanthropy,
it's… just PR bullshit.
Thank you.
Yeah, coz! Tell 'em!
And I challenge any other
ridiculously wealthy people
who are watching this to do the same.
'Cause otherwise, it's not philanthropy,
- it's just PR bullshit.
- Just PR bullshit.
Look at that guy's face.
Holy fucking shit.
Do you know what you just did?
Kind of. I think I blacked out
up there a little bit.
Okay.
- I don't know. Is this crazy?
- Yeah.
I mean, can we really do this?
No idea. All I know is
you're a complete fucking badass.
Let's give it up for this queen. She's back!
Thank you.
Now, listen, coz,
when you finally do get down to broke,
you're welcome to crash at my place.
I appreciate it, Howard.
Ah, okay,
but just between inner circle here,
you are gonna keep some of the money, right?
Like, 20 billion, 10 billion?
Well, I think the whole point is
to give all of it away,
not just some.
Okay, so, one billion?
You're not gonna need that money,
because from what I hear,
you are a brilliant actor
with a bright future.
And I am never going to miss
another performance again.
I promise.
Unless it's a musical.
Oh, my God. I'd never put you through that.
Thank you.
Okay, so I asked Ainsley to make this
to show us what our new mission is.
- We get this down to zero. Y'all ready?
- Oh, yeah.
Yeah!
Thank you, guys, really.
From the bottom of my heart.
Now, I haven't given away all my money yet.
So, tonight, it's all on me.
Let's just drink this berry stuff
and fuck up Corsica.
- Let's get drunk.
- Cheers to that.
Yeah.
Should we open a bottle of champagne?
That's worse than that stuff
I drank onstage.
Yeah. It turns on you quick.
Whew.
You ever think about
being in an animated movie?
I can't just start being in movies.
Well, not with that attitude, you can't.
But what if it's this?
You play a funny little clam in the ocean,
but you can't make a pearl,
so you're like,
"Is there something wrong with me?"
But there isn't.
You don't need a pearl to be beautiful.
Okay, buddy, how about, um,
we take a break from the mirto for now?
Good job.
- Um, excuse me, guys.
- Yeah.
- Hey.
- Hi.
How are you holding up?
What do you mean? Did something happen?
What you said up there was incredible.
I've never seen anyone
do anything like that before.
Aw, thanks.
Part of me is freaked out a little bit,
because I really don't wanna move in
with Howard.
Yeah. Mmm.
But part of me is excited.
Yeah, I can see that.
I mean, your life is gonna be
completely different.
I think maybe that's a good thing.
I've been living
at the extremes for so long,
maybe it's time for a quieter,
more normal life.
I think that could be really nice.
Yeah.
Um…
Actually, there is something that
I've been meaning to talk to you about.
What is it?
Oh, my God.
Things got pretty crazy last night,
didn't they?
Yeah.
Yeah. Things got really crazy.