The Ultimatum: Queer Love (2023) s01e10 Episode Script

The Reunion

1
Like to be the center of attention ♪
[JOANNA] Come on in. Take a seat.
I like this top on you.
- Do you love it?
- Amazing.
- Welcome.
- [LEXI] Hi. How are you?
It's so good to see you all.
[LEXI] How are you?
[JOANNA] Welcome. Good.
Take a seat. How are you?
Take a seat.
Let's get down to it.
You guys look incredible.
It's so great to see you all.
How are we feeling? Are we
excited? Are we nervous?
Are we ready for this? I
know I am ready for this.
- We're here.
- [JOANNA] Yeah. I love it.
- Welcome to The Ultimatum reunion.
- [LEXI] So pretty.
I'm JoAnna Garcia Swisher, and we
are here today to dish all the dirt
and find out what has been going
on since we last saw everyone.
For those of you who
gave the ultimatums,
you're sitting on this side,
and those who received the ultimatums,
you are sitting on this side.
- [ALL] Oh
- [LAUGHTER]
- [JOANNA] Now it all makes sense? Okay.
- [ALL] Yeah.
I'm so excited to hear
how things are going,
'cause I saw a lot of growth
throughout this process.
I feel like we've all grown
in all of our own ways.
That's what I felt proud of, too,
just, like, watching
everyone choose themselves.
And, like, for the ones that
didn't know how to do that before,
and then we found out how to do it.
- I'm looking at you guys.
- Yeah.
'Cause I super related
to you guys' story.
And that was, like, the best thing.
It was just really intimate and
and special to know each one of you.
It's just everyone's development.
You really started speaking up.
I was so, like, into everyone.
I'm like, everyone's so raw, so genuine.
- It was so beautiful. I don't know.
- Yeah.
I can say I feel happier now,
and so that made me, like,
realize how much I've grown.
What was your funniest, favorite moment?
Did anything stand out?
My facial expressions made me laugh.
I didn't realize the
cameras catch everything.
- And I'm looking crazy a lot of times.
- [JOANNA] Didn't miss any of it.
Weren't a lot of
moments with Yoly and I,
but every time we were on together,
I was like, "This bitch!"
[LAUGHS] Like, I love you.
Oh man.
So, who has tied the knot?
Has anyone found their
way back together?
Any regrets?
Or has anyone gone their separate ways?
We're about to find out.
Rae, Lexi. So?
Tell me where you are. Tell
me how the last year has been.
Um, the last year has been amazing.
Proposal, vacations
We moved back to California,
um, a few months ago.
And I mean, I feel
like just the other week
we were talking about all
the great memories we've had.
And it's just been
It's just been such a time.
It wholeheartedly has been
the best year of my life.
Yeah. Like, this past year
has been amazing, really.
I think for me all the what-ifs
of, like, being at The Ultimatum
and making a decision to, like
"Am I gonna be with Lexi?"
"Do I wanna be with Lexi?
Am I happy with myself?"
You know, the fucking
what-ifs never end,
and I'm a chronic
over-thinker like that.
But once I kinda got out of that limbo
and said, like, "Yes, I choose
you. You are my 'hell yeah, '"
it just got easier.
Yeah.
The white noise and the
possibilities just kind of faded away,
and we got to focus on, like,
what we want, moving forward.
We got a bunch of new
furniture. That made me cry too.
[LAUGHTER]
We've been really quiet about it,
just, like, enjoying being engaged.
Although I'm, like, wholeheartedly
Don't take this for face value,
but if there was, like, a freaking
whatever, officiant here, like
I am actually an ordained minister.
- [LAUGHS] Rae will kill me.
- [JOANNA] Just saying
I will murder her.
- [LEXI] Rae knows if it was today
- I'm just saying.
- My mom's, like, set on a specific date.
- [JOANNA] Okay.
So we didn't have much of a say.
So we know the date, but I don't know
where any of it's happening, but
- She'll figure it out for you.
- The planning hopefully will begin.
By "begin," I mean I want
nothing to do with it.
- I want my mom to do everything.
- I was the same way.
- Don't even wanna look at it. Yeah.
- I just showed up.
[JOANNA] Well, you both were
just beaming with happiness,
and I think I speak for everyone at home
that we were all hoping for a
happy ending to your love story.
But we can't talk about Lexi and
Rae without talking about Fingergate.
- [RAE] Oh my God.
- [MAL] Oh gosh.
Should we, uh [LAUGHS]
turn the lights off?
- Oh!
- Oh.
[VANESSA] A little closer.
[FURTIVE KISSING, MOANING]
[RAE] Keep doing that. That felt good.
[LEXI] Is there a reason
why you fucked Rae?
[CHUCKLING] I didn't fuck Rae.
Oh, I'm sorry. Rae fucked you.
- No. No, it's
- And there was penetration.
- [YOLY] What's funny?
- It's not funny at all.
You end up being inside of the person
I came here with and that I love.
- You don't fuck
- [YOLY] Friends.
[LEXI] You don't fuck friends like that.
Um, I can respect there was,
like, a degree of vulgarity,
and in the moment, I probably
was fixated on the, like
"Did they have sex? Did they
fool around? What does that mean?"
And also, like, for queer people, in
general, that's not a defined term.
What you may define as sex
I may not define as sex,
versus what they define as sex.
Like, it's so vague.
And so intimacy, in general,
for me, in that sense,
because we are queer, and
'cause sex is different,
I was like, "Really,
you didn't have sex?
She's doing this to this person."
"That's sex to me."
So yeah, I apologize
for the vulgarity of it.
I have to have a different
version of thought
because we're all having different sex.
I felt like the worst person
in the world for a long time.
Like, it still gets me
worked up to think, like
[SIGHS]
to feel like I hurt
someone that I love. [SIGHS]
I came here to figure out
if I wanted to be with her,
and I made the process
like 20 times harder on both of us.
I mean, regardless of
whether we had had discussions
about being okay with doing whatever.
- You can't promise you're gonna be okay.
- Yeah.
At the end of the day, you don't
know how you'll feel until it happens,
and you have to feel it.
[JOANNA] Vanessa, I have to
ask, looking back at the strife,
how do you feel?
Um, I I think I've
always felt the same.
I think we shared the sentiment
that we weren't in love with each other.
We weren't romantically involved.
We both ended up doing something,
and it wasn't necessary. We knew.
Yeah.
It wasn't something that we, like,
needed to do to help us on our journey.
And I felt that then. So did Rae.
And I think we both feel
the same way about it.
We recognize it didn't need
to happen. It didn't help us.
It didn't totally seem like that.
It felt very like you
were going through it
and, like, having an
emotional situation,
and you were like, "We fucked. It
was fun. Haha! We did funny things."
I agree. I was definitely
I recognized immediately
Rae's heaviness on it,
and that was me trying
to make light of it.
I think a great thing for me that
came from reflecting on this
Such a crutch for me is being
the bold person, the funny person,
trying to make a joke out of everything.
I've done that my whole life.
And I never realized that.
And I don't need to do that.
It's not always appropriate,
and it doesn't come out well.
And I don't want to do that anymore,
so that's been my
resolution for this year,
is try to be more serious and calm.
I'm sorry I affected you, and I
don't expect you to be my friend.
And I will stay out of your life,
as I, hopefully, I feel like
you can recognize I have.
And I just I hope you can, I don't
Forget about me, I guess. [LAUGHS]
No, totally. Totally forgotten.
I mean, listen, like, all good.
We're living our life, and
you're not in it, and that's that.
Here we are. Like, that's
all there is to say, really.
- Yeah.
- [JOANNA] What do the rest of you think?
I know y'all went through it,
and y'all came out the other side.
But I really see it with you two,
and I love you both, and
it's something to aspire to.
Thanks.
They really work hard for
each other, and I love that.
Like, there's sheer vulnerability
between the two of them.
I've always been a
fan of them working out
and treating each other good.
I have individual relationships.
I obviously speak to
Lexi a whole lot more,
but that's not out of
any love lost for Rae.
I love Rae to death.
I text her, you know?
So I'm happy.
I better be the flower girl at
their wedding, just to be clear.
So what's next for Lexi and Rae?
We're gonna start splitting our
time between here and the East Coast
to have a little bit of closeness
to my family and to hers.
I want kids.
Like, I think we have a plan of
exactly how we want to have kids,
and now we're investing towards that.
[JOANNA] Mm-hmm.
Think we probably need
to get married first.
[JOANNA] Yeah.
I dunno if we're in a rush
for kids, but we know the plan.
- Exciting time.
- Yeah.
Very fresh.
I can't wait for my wedding invitation.
[ALL LAUGHING]
While one of our couples
prepares to walk down the aisle,
Xander, you decided to
walk away from Vanessa
after spending four years together.
And Vanessa, that was an ending
that you never saw coming.
So where are you and
Xander now, in all of this?
You're not communicating
a ton? Communicating?
At At all.
Like, uh I mean, yeah,
it's nice to see you.
But
No. Uh, no, we don't talk.
It was a real big struggle for me
for the first few months
after the experience.
I still wanted you, obviously, you know.
I felt there was a chance
we'd rekindle and fix things.
Then it became clear that
wasn't going to happen,
and we really did just
kind of stop talking.
But I love you as a friend,
and I think it took this
experience to realize
[TEARFULLY] we
shouldn't be together.
It's, like sad, but [SNIFFLES]
but, like, it's good because now we can
work on who we are
together without romance.
And I think maybe that's
what we were supposed to do.
I think we were supposed to
do exactly what we just did.
I felt like over, like, the time
of this little experiment thing,
I realized I was putting so
much focus and so much attention
on, like, the outcome
and getting married and
having the family and, like
But then what?
I don't know. Something in me was like,
"You left that experiment saying
that you were gonna choose yourself
and you were gonna learn
how to love yourself,"
and, like, I feel like
it was just so obvious
watching myself during those episodes
that I struggled so deeply with that.
And I think by the point
that maybe I was grieving,
we weren't even talking.
So she probably would have no idea.
And that's okay.
There's a lot of emotion here.
Is there any hope that
you might come back,
Vanessa and Xander?
[VANESSA SIGHS]
My emotion comes from
knowing that's a no.
I think you know it too.
But, like, I'm I love you so much,
and I'm so willing to
accept whoever you are
and whatever growth you've had.
Like, I was scared to see
Xander, but the second I see her,
I'm like, "I fucking love that girl."
And, so
Like, I'll happily accept
whatever our next chapter is.
How does that make you feel?
[INHALES DEEPLY]
I think it's something
that I was really nervous
that I was never gonna hear
Vanessa say, to be honest.
I knew that I didn't
want her out of my life,
but I knew I was gonna
be a different person.
I knew that, once I started this
journey, that I was gonna change.
I think you're right. I
feel like romantically,
there's been too many
things that have happened.
You deserve someone
who gives you their all.
And I wasn't doing that. [SNIFFS]
But, like [SNIFFLES]
I'll never look back
and be mad that I dated you.
You're my fucking buddy, you know?
[JOANNA] Xander?
[TEARFULLY] Vanessa is
my best friend. It
It was hard not having her for
to talk to for a while.
So I'm happy to feel like
I can get my friend back.
[JOANNA] I know this isn't easy,
and a lot of life has happened,
so thank you for that.
Not that I'm ending this at all.
Just so you know, this is not over.
I felt like I needed to say that.
So, Mal.
- [LAUGHTER]
- I felt it.
This is good. We should lead this way.
[JOANNA] Your love
for Yoly never wavered.
But who held Yoly's heart? It kept
us guessing until the very end.
Where was your headspace?
Upon leaving the experience,
it was very much like,
"Let me work this out with
Mal. Mal is who I chose."
"Mal's who I want to see
things through with. It's Mal."
So where are you now?
Um
Happily broken up.
Happily broken up?
Mm-hmm.
And how quickly after
you left this experience
did you feel like things were
turning in that direction?
Um
Two weeks.
Maybe for you, not
necessarily for me, but
Sure.
Do you remember going on vacation,
and then you got a one-way home
and telling me you were
not planning on staying?
You were moving out.
That was within two weeks.
Of us getting back?
[YOLY] Yes.
Okay.
I mean Okay.
We can see throughout The Ultimatum
that your history of
being honest doesn't track.
So it wasn't two weeks after being back.
Okay.
My fear was that, as soon as
the camera stopped filming,
Mal was gonna go back to her
To our ways that I know of.
So that happened.
Um, we spent some time apart.
And in that time apart, she was like,
"I This is not gonna work out."
And I didn't fight back.
And that was kind of it for
Until she moved out.
Upon you going back home
for the month and a half
and having the time
apart, we were broken up.
- You weren't engaged any longer?
- No.
- [JOANNA] So you both agree on that?
- Mm-hmm.
I think, to Yoly's point,
the way that we handle conflict
has historically been trash.
Um, and that came up again.
I felt like this was
not the relationship
I wanted to continue being in.
It just felt like handling conflict
that way is not sustainable.
And I'm a little triggered
'cause what I watched
was different than
what we've talked about.
And what's hard is watching this
seeing dishonesty
What was dishonest?
In the middle of your relationship,
which was only 21 days
Wasn't that long, so
"middle," I think, is valid
You were DMing me,
telling me, "Don't worry about
it with Xander. I love you."
- Mm-hmm.
- And, like, you know what you're choosing.
Unprovoked, 'cause I didn't
ask for that reassurance.
Clearly, that was not the case.
- What was triggering?
- At the party Lemme finish.
And then at the party
when you come to me,
and you asked me and I trust you,
and I'm like, "My partner
wants to clear things up,
have closure talks, whatever
the hell it is. Go do that."
"I don't care. Do what you gotta do."
I'm thinking this is a closure talk,
maybe there's questions about things.
"How are you doing?"
Not, hey, at a party,
playing in my face,
saying, "I love you.
I miss you so much."
Holding hands, doing all the things.
That's wild as fuck.
Hella disrespectful.
- It is.
- I would've never did you like that.
I do agree. I did not like I
Watching it, I was like,
"Oh, that's uncomfortable."
- That's degrading. I deserve better.
- [YOLY] It's disrespectful. You do.
So
I do think that I did not realize
we held hands as long as we did.
- I was almost a little
- "As long as we did" is wild
That's a wild statement, bro.
I'm just saying I was not okay with
it. I apologize. That was not cool.
Definitely, that that's not cool.
The tough part about this
It's less about watching
her with another person.
The tough part about it is, I
reflect on the whole fucking thing,
and I'm like, "I've known this person
for five years in close circle to me,
and now I'm looking at
our entire relationship
through a different lens."
And you feel like a
dangerous stranger to me.
And that is hurtful.
That really sucks, because
I had your back so hard,
and all you did was made
a complete fool of me.
I look like an ass on television.
I've been I was telling you
the way I felt about Xander.
I don't see where I lied in that.
It's not comfortable.
I'm not proud of it.
I kind of look like
I'm an ad for polyamory.
- I'm not trying to be.
- [LIGHT LAUGH]
The great part about you
is that you inadvertently
showed everybody on TV
how great of a partner I am and
how great of a mother I will be.
I get why you may not
be, um cool right now.
It's I I mean,
it was hard to watch.
My animosity is less about me
and Yoly being partners and lovers
and more about my my friend.
Like, my fucking friend.
And are you still
friends now? Are you ?
I mean, sure. I thought we were,
yeah. I don't lie to my friends.
But, yes, I could imagine
She's family to me,
and sometimes there are cousins
that you can't stand very much.
And, right now, in this moment,
after watching that, you
are definitely that cousin.
It must have been hard.
Everyone kept asking me, am
I nervous about seeing anyone?
Like, I don't give a fuck.
I'm excited about seeing
half most of you.
The only thing
I know it's gonna be rough to see,
like, me and Xander like, all
and I know how I am
when I'm in lovey-dovey,
and that's gonna be tough.
I was like, "I don't
want to hurt Mal again."
Watching you guys be
lovey-dovey is not hard.
It's easy to watch people in
love. That's a beautiful thing.
Whatever you guys shared
is absolutely palpable,
and I even found myself, like
That is very cute.
Like, I think it's cute.
For what we saw and how palpable it was,
you almost deserve to try.
You guys You did try.
- Right?
- I mean, outside in the wild.
They did.
- You couldn't wait to bring that up.
- [JOANNA] What? You tried in the wild?
Well, I would love to know about that.
Did you?
If we're being really honest,
we stayed in communication some,
and we saw each other
while we were at Coachella.
[JOANNA] What happened?
- Nothing. We just listened to music.
- I mean, all we saw
- Right. We saw Megan Thee Stallion.
- I found
[JOANNA] Were you
excited to see each other?
Yeah, it was nervous, right?
- Like, "Oh shit."
- [XANDER] Yeah.
I mean, yeah, 'cause,
like, I mean, I knew you
during that specific time
in my life, you know? Like
[JOANNA] Months later?
- Right. So it was months later, yeah.
- [YOLY] Yeah, a while. A while.
So there's nothing more to Coachella?
It was just a hang?
Yeah.
Was that your big reveal, Vanessa?
- Um
- I know you guys didn't stop talking.
No, when Xander and
I returned to Hawaii,
when we were trying to make it work,
I was surprised when, a
few weeks in, I did find out
that her and Yoly were
planning a trip to Hawaii.
- It was jarring.
- To Hawaii?
Yeah.
Was I going to Hawaii?
Can you confirm that, Xander?
We had mentioned that you were
gonna try and come out at some point.
[YOLY] Oh, okay. Okay.
- [XANDER] 'Cause we had talked about it.
- [YOLY] Yeah, okay.
You didn't know about
the Hawaii trip, did you?
[TERSELY] No.
She said she needed to
stop talking to Xander.
Didn't know that there was actual
plans of that or looking up flights.
I had a great time with Xander.
I was hoping to reconnect
and try in any way possible.
[XANDER] I was thinking about Yoly.
We had, you know, all these memories
over, like, the three
weeks that felt like months.
- We were gonna support each other.
- What happened?
We were in each other's
journey for a little bit,
and now we're back to,
like, doing our own stuff.
I knew there was something
going on inside me that was like,
- "You need to figure your shit out."
- [JOANNA] Mm-hmm.
"You got a lot going on.
You don't need to be putting
it all over the place,"
even though that's what I did.
But I feel like I really
needed to commit to myself
and, like, figure out how to
change the things I wanted to
so I could show up better for myself
and for any partner that I have.
Xander, parenthood was a big
topic of conversation for you.
You were super ready.
[XANDER] It's definitely a big priority.
I just want to make sure that I
feel like that I'm able to provide.
I feel like it's cool,
right? That, like
I feel like queer people
are able to, like
We plan a lot. Like, we have to.
So it changes things.
Um, so I have to make sure I've
got all my stuff squared away first.
- [JOANNA] Ducks in a row.
- Yeah.
Yoly, where are you at with parenthood?
Um
Ooh, tears.
Um, I Ooh.
[CHUCKLES] Sorry.
Um, I thought I would
be a parent with Mal.
And
I don't want to rush and find a partner,
so I can have someone to
have a kid with. Like
What is more important to me is to have,
like, a viable, sustainable,
healthy, supportive relationship.
I'm realizing that
Um [VOICE BREAKING, SNIFFLES]
motherhood might not be a thing for me.
I didn't think I'd be
this sad about it. [LAUGHS]
But I'm just like, "Shit, I
wanted to be a mother, but "
It's okay. I mean, I can
You know, I have my dog.
There's so many ways
you can be a mother,
but I don't know what that
looks like right now, so
I don't I don't know.
But I will babysit any one of y'all's.
[LIGHT LAUGHTER]
Getting comfortable with what it
looks like to not have my own child,
but to still be a mother in
every other concept that there is.
You're prioritizing yourself,
and I think that will
pay off in dividends.
I think you're gonna
have everything you want.
I love that. Thank you
for the vote of confidence.
- [JOANNA] Have a little faith.
- Thank you.
Yeah.
Speaking of parenthood, there
was a lot of love on the show,
but there was also a lot of puppy love.
I'm talking about fur babies.
[SCATTERED LAUGHS]
Let's take a look.
Oh God.
- Marge for the cock-block.
- [XANDER LAUGHS]
Margaux's a dog, right? But
that's my child, my baby.
- Oh
- Hi.
You little big booty girl.
If Margaux doesn't like
you, I cannot fuck with you.
Good girl!
[MILDRED] You ready for bed?
Go night-night?
You're spoiled. We don't
know how to unspoil you.
Tiff and I have
discussed having children,
and we decided that, um,
we'll take another dog,
but not have another baby.
[TIFF] Let me give her
some sweet potato fries too.
[SAM] Tiff has cooked for
Shylo a handful of times,
and this was the first
time, um, after two weeks
that Tiff has made me anything.
[TIFF] Got chicken, turkey
burger, sweet potatoes.
Yeah?
I support my baby.
[CONTENT PANTING]
[LIGHT LAUGHTER]
How is Shylo?
Shylo is doing good now.
She, um, had to get,
like, emergency surgery.
Um, I spent all Christmas day,
um, in the hospital, uh, for her.
When did Shylo have surgery?
[TIFF] Um
December 21st to December 25th?
Ish, yeah, give or take.
I dunno. I just want
to get the dates correct
so that I have my facts straight.
What do you mean by, you wanna make
sure you have your facts straight?
On Christmas Eve, my sister
and my family received, like,
messages and phone calls from Tiff
that Shylo was not gonna make it,
and that that they needed to see
- I didn't say Shylo wasn't gonna make it.
- I'm speaking now.
[TIFF] Yeah, sure.
That, like, was very intrusive.
We're not on speaking terms.
You're not allowed in
my life anymore, so
Wait. Oops, sorry.
Last time I saw you, you were
getting engaged on the beach.
So I take it you're no longer together.
- What happened?
- [MILDRED] We got engaged, like you know.
Then we decided to move in together,
but there was no plans for the future.
We can never talk about a wedding.
There wasn't anything that I
could see in the future with Tiff.
It was like the cloud came
back. Like there was no clarity.
It felt like, "Well,
what did I do all this for
if we're right back into the same thing
where we're not serious
about our future?"
I asked, "Can we have a
bank account together?"
"Can we do these things together?"
Those things never got done.
"And can you get a job?"
That was another topic.
Uh, I had one.
There were so many problems.
There were so many whys.
There was a lot of things that happened
that are really hard to talk about.
So I had to make a decision.
It was one of the hardest
decisions that I've ever made, ever.
To leave Tiff.
[TIFF] Real quick.
I'm a little confused.
How were you the one that left?
Are you talking about
physically-left-the-premise left?
Tiff, if you want to take the show
and tell everyone you broke up with me,
then that's fine.
It really doesn't matter.
Then why go out of your
way to say you left?
- Because I left the home, Tiff.
- [TIFF] Left the home. Okay.
I parted physically from the home.
[TIFF] Oh. Okay.
Well, what's your perspective?
The stuff that we went through
post-show was happening on show.
I just feel like we had a
overall unhealthy relationship
that was trying our best.
That's the way I saw it.
[MILDRED] So why take the next step
if you feel that you had
an unhealthy relationship?
[TIFF] Did I feel like we were
starting to find ways to communicate
where we felt like, at one
point, we were on the same side,
on the same team and
trusted each other? I did.
You know?
Obviously it changed.
But I'm asking you, why move in with
me, when you know I have a child?
Why move in with me when you
weren't financially ready?
Um, I could ask you the
same thing. Why would you?
- I believed in you.
- I believed in you.
[MILDRED] I believed you
were gonna be committed.
I didn't realize how you were
very immature emotionally.
You know, I had to take a lot
of financial responsibility.
- How?
- I felt financially taken advantage of
How? I never borrowed money from
you. What are you even talking about?
I was asked to split the rent of my home
into three because I have a child.
- What the fuck? Oh my God.
- [MILDRED] I enabled you.
[TIFF] Mildred
Yes, Tiff.
I didn't tell you to
split the rent in three.
I'm sorry. I'm a little naive. I asked.
- As far as splitting the rent in three
- You didn't ask me.
- I asked you No, I did not tell you.
- You told me.
[TIFF] I did not tell you.
No. I did not tell you to do that.
So how did it come up?
- [TIFF] Hmm?
- How did it come up?
If you didn't tell
her. I'm just curious.
If you didn't tell her to
split it, how'd it come up?
I didn't ask you to do it.
I didn't tell you to do it.
To be honest, I don't remember
that exact conversation.
I don't remember how it
started, so I can't
You don't remember, but it
happened, and it was hurtful for me.
Okay.
So, what was the turning point?
What was the moment it went sideways?
Obviously, as you all know, we
had a very tumultuous relationship.
It was a roller coaster.
There was a lot of ups
and downs, you know
It's really hard for me to say.
You know, um, I was arrested.
I threw a picture frame, and I broke it,
and the glass shattered everywhere.
I threw a pet gate at you,
and it was really heavy.
At the same time, I was grabbing
all of your clothes from the closet
and throwing them down stairs, because
I wanted you to leave my home
You did throw the dog gate? Police
statement says you took it back.
- She just said she did.
- Let me finish. I need to finish.
- Okay?
- [TIFF] Mm-hm.
You don't have that
power over me anymore.
- Yeah, I threw something at you.
- Okay.
You called the police at me.
And they arrested me in my home.
They took my engagement ring off.
I never put it back on.
I I'm not proud of what I did,
but there was a lot of fighting.
There was always screaming,
yelling, punching the walls.
Good God.
Tiff called me a trash mom, degraded me.
There was a lot of problems
when it came to my son,
and I did not feel accepted as a mother.
- What do you mean by that?
- [MILDRED] I come with a package.
My son will always be first.
I will always be a mother first.
Yeah, I did have a problem with
connecting with your son, absolutely.
I did. I tried, but, honestly
[MILDRED] There was a
lot of sneaking around.
You changed the passcode on your phone.
You decided to open a dating
app and bring women to the house,
not come home.
- When did I bring a woman to the house?
- [MILDRED] Like, when
- [TIFF] We were broken up.
- We were, but I was paying rent.
My things were there.
If we're broken up, am I
allowed to be on a dating app?
Absolutely.
- No one's judging you for it.
- [TIFF] You just did.
I'm judging you for having me
take care of some bills
and having my things
- What bills did you
- in the home we created,
while you're out there,
you know, sleeping around.
There was a week where I got home
at three in the morning. And guess what?
Tiff wasn't home. That's where I
found eyeliner. I don't wear eyeliner.
- [TIFF] What makeup are you talk
- I don't own eyeliner.
I don't know who was in my house.
And there was just all
these, like, sex board games.
- Mildred.
- That was very painful for me.
I got enough of an imagination.
I don't need no fucking board
game. What're you talking about?
I actually have them.
They came in the mail.
- The leasing office gave them to me.
- Sure.
- What board games?
- So I will send you pictures.
- You're screaming to everyone.
- Send pictures?
- What board game is it called?
- Asking what board games.
I'll send them.
- [TIFF] Sex board game?
- I'm glad you're
You're literally here just fucking
straight-up fucking gaslighting me.
- Are you fucking kidding?
- [MILDRED] I have them.
I don't care what it's
called. What I care about is
[TIFF] What are you
you did that to me
while I was living with you.
That's what I care about.
- Mildred.
- The betrayal.
[TIFF] This is the way
I look at everything
I hope you let me talk. Every
time you talk it makes this ear
Like, it just hurts my ear.
[BREATHES DEEPLY]
[TIFF] Shit.
Tiff.
[RAGGED BREATHING]
[TIFF SOBBING QUIETLY]
[AUSSIE] I'm not taking sides here,
but just Tiff saying
the word "gaslighting,"
um, it just brought back a lot of
my experience with, um, Mildred.
I just feel like Tiff was
just put on blast right now
because there was all the
blame put on one person,
and it didn't feel right to me.
[SAM] I wanna talk to Tiff.
Do you need water? Do you need anything?
- It's a lot.
- Yeah, it is a lot.
[TIFF] I'm literally
questioning my fucking reality
Like, what is this? Like, I'm
literally being, like, gaslit.
Not on everything, but a lie.
Like, I didn't [SOBS SOFTLY]
I have no problem admitting
where I went wrong,
but I will speak up on some
things that did not happen.
[GASPS SOFTLY, SNIFFLES]
I did have a rough Like, it
was hard to connect to her son.
But there's also certain things that
Like, I have so much fucking proof
What? Do you want bank statements
of me paying my fucking rent?
- Where's all this stuff?
- You don't have to.
- Why do I constantly feel like I need to
- Hey.
- You don't Yeah.
- What the fuck, dude?
You don't need to prove
anything to her, okay?
Like, you're not
- That's what I've been doing.
- I know. I know.
And now you're done, right?
Like, now this is your realization,
and enough's enough. Right?
I'm not going back in to
talk. I'm not going back in.
What's honestly best for me is to
never see her fucking face again.
- [PRODUCER] No, I hear it.
- Like, it's that simple. Like, I
[SAM] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
- Like, I [SNIFFS]
- Yeah.
- [TIFF] I want to move on, in that sense.
- Yeah.
[PRODUCER] We should walk to the
studio, even if you go in or not,
'cause you're gonna
get your death of cold.
- [PRODUCER] Thank you, Sam.
- Yeah.
[JOANNA] Hey, Sam. How are you feeling?
It's cold outside.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
[JOANNA] Well, we're glad you're back.
Can I ask, is Tiff coming back?
No.
- How's Tiff doing?
- As good as Tiff can be doing right now.
Mildred, where are you in your
healing process with all of this?
It's just been really hard
to just rebuild everything.
But I'm doing really good.
And I'm not happy I don't have
Tiff. Obviously, it's a loss.
But I'm happy that I'm happy, genuinely.
And are you dating or open to that?
I know that I eventually will
get there because I love love.
And I believe in love.
So I know that day is gonna come.
It's just not here yet.
I love that.
- [YOLY] I love that for you.
- Thank you.
I want to move on to Sam and Aussie.
How are you?
- [CHUCKLES]
- [JOANNA] Where are you?
Have you gotten something other
than a rock for an engagement ring?
- [LAUGHTER]
- I laughed so hard when I saw that.
And your face was so
great. You were like
I was hoping for some laugh
track in the background, you know?
- You got it from me.
- Good shit.
- It was crickets.
- I laughed.
It was such a long pause. After
"rock," I was like, "Okay "
In real life, it was, like,
five times longer than what
- Oh my God!
- [AUSSIE] It really was.
- But it worked out.
- But it worked out.
You left engaged.
So are you wedding
planning? Are you married?
- Where are you in you relationship?
- We're not married yet.
[SAM] We're kind of waiting.
It was kinda like, "How do
we explain this to people?"
[CHUCKLING] Like, it's just so
awkward. Do we make up a story?
- Like, I don't know.
- [LAUGHTER]
You don't have pictures. You're
not putting it on social media.
- It's, like, just weird.
- [SAM] It was really funny.
We were watching TV on
the couch, and I was like,
"So you know that being engaged
means you get married after, right?"
- [LAUGHTER]
- It's a process.
Like a deer in the headlights.
- Like, Aussie didn't make the connection.
- "Oh, wait a minute "
[LIGHT LAUGHTER]
So what's new in your life?
Um, I have to say there's been
a lot of, uh, self-discovery.
I have a hard time
figuring out who I am,
in terms of, like, my relationship
from what I experienced in
You know, when I was younger.
So building that "What do I want?"
That's been my journey right now.
A lot of your struggles
were about communication.
Do you feel like your
communication has gotten stronger?
- Yeah.
- [SAM] We've kinda found this balance of
Okay, I need to sit with the
discomfort of, like, allowing space,
and, like, Aussie sits with
the discomfort of, like
Staying.
shortening that time
needing, like, space away.
And so it's kinda We've
kinda just, like, figured it out.
- Compromise.
- [SAM LAUGHS] Yeah.
I feel like I'm like Aussie.
Like, I need that space,
and for you to, like, kind of
realize that you need to allow that
- It's really special.
- I could not agree more with her.
Truthfully, 'cause I know
it's something we fight about.
And I'm like, "I sure as hell don't know
if I could've given that much space."
It's like, "Damn, Sam. Like "
- [BOTH CHUCKLING]
- Like, holy crap.
I definitely couldn't do it.
- So
- You can do better.
[LIGHT CHUCKLE]
Aussie, during the experience,
your family really didn't
know where you
- Have you met?
- [AUSSIE] Not yet.
[JOANNA] Do they know about Sam?
They don't yet.
Um, that's something I want to cross
when we announce the engagement.
And, um, you know,
we haven't done that yet
with our family members.
But that's something that
I They'll find out.
- Okay. So that's the plan.
- [AUSSIE] That's the plan.
Surprise.
[LAUGHS SOFTLY] Oh my God.
In the past, maybe I would have,
like, not told them about it,
but I'm trying to embrace me,
and I'm trying to be more open
and, um, just my my live my truth.
So, I'm gonna go with it.
[JOANNA] So are we headed
to Australia for a wedding?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
- We were gonna have two
- Really?
- Destination wedding?
- We'll be there.
I think we'll have two.
One here and one there.
- Okay.
- So that, yeah, everyone can attend.
[YOLY] That is so cute.
It's great to see your happy ending.
- Thank you.
- Watching everyone's internal struggle
and how really we all just put
our hearts on the line, so much
And there was so much growth
and so much change in all of us.
Um, and I appreciate I mean,
I feel like I grew with all of you guys.
And it's just It really
was just incredible to see.
I feel like I cried more watching
it than I did during it.
- Which is surprising, I know.
- [JOANNA LAUGHS]
I have so much respect for all
of you for sharing this journey.
It was really a beautiful thing,
and why I think this whole
story is so compelling.
Do you have any regrets, watching back?
Biggest regret is that I made
bad impressions on you guys.
I came in here thinking,
"What an amazing thing."
"I'm gonna get to hang
out with " Nine?
" nine queer people."
"Like, this is a dream."
And it it didn't turn out like that.
And I'm a big reason for that.
I firmly believe when I say that,
if Rae and I hadn't worked out,
the experience would have
been every bit as worth it
to have just, like,
had what I had with Mal.
It's so hard to meet friends nowadays.
It's harder to meet
people that become family.
- [MAL] Yeah.
- It's hard to do that in three weeks.
- We had some funny moments.
- [CHUCKLES]
[AUSSIE] It was worth
the challenges. Yeah.
I think we had it for the
We did it for the right reasons.
You know, you have to pick
You have to choose In hard
moments, you have to pick love.
When I'm not my best self,
Sam's not her best self,
like, we just have to, you know,
choose each other again and again.
- So how do you feel about ultimatums?
- [SCATTERED LAUGHTER]
I think one was enough.
Still hate 'em.
- [JOANNA] Still hate 'em? Okay.
- Yeah, no.
When you're given an ultimatum,
there's so much pressure,
and, like, I was feeling
a lot of resentment.
Now I'm in the place where
I did make my decision,
and I'm happy.
But no more ultimatums, lady.
I won't. I won't. I got you. I promise.
- We all heard it?
- Yep.
- A promise made.
- It's on record. Stamping it.
- [LIGHT LAUGHTER]
- I can own that.
I still am a firm believer
that we wouldn't be where we are
if we didn't do this.
[AUSSIE] I second that.
- Are you all happy you did the show?
- [LEXI] Yes.
I feel really grateful
for where I'm at now.
- [JOANNA] It brought clarity for you?
- [MAL] Yeah.
You date so much differently now.
Like, I'm so proud of how you move
through your life and your choices now.
Oh yeah. I'm more confident.
I listen to my voice more.
And because of that, I've also had
really great dating experiences.
Like, it makes me so happy.
[JOANNA] I love that.
Thank you for your generosity
and your trust in The Ultimatum.
[LEXI] Thank you.
I'll make you hold on tighter ♪
I'll make you shine brighter ♪
Make you feel so magnificent ♪
Your dad's okay?
Yeah. You know
Brighter, brighter ♪
We can feel so magnificent ♪
[SONG TRAILS OFF]
I'm breaking all the rules ♪
I'm playing it so cool ♪
I'm playing it so cool, baby ♪
I'm breaking all the rules ♪
I'm playing it so cool ♪
I'm playing it so cool, baby ♪
'Cause I'm never gonna ever stop ♪
I'm always gonna shake it up ♪
Always gonna shake it up ♪
[SONG TRAILS OFF]
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