I Didn't Do It (2014) s01e11 Episode Script

Which one's Logan? Seriously, sign-spinner? Nobody messes with my sister.
Wait, dude, hear me out.
It is not what you Whoa! Watson, unless you're an undercover koi fish or a quarter, you have no business being in that fountain.
Ugh.
Neighborhood Watch-Doug.
That's mall security guard Doug.
I've got a license to tase.
Now, what are you doing in the fountain?! It all started when this really cute girl gave me her number.
I'm glad I met you, Logan.
You're really cool and mellow and laid-back Can I have your digits?! You're not one of those guys who gets a number and never texts, are you? No! No, I'm one of those guys who never gets numbers.
All right.
I'll look for your text.
You won't have to look far.
It'll be right on your phone.
Oh, yeah.
Who just got a hecka cute girl's number? That's right.
This guy.
Good lookin' out, sign-spinner.
'Sup, Haley.
It's Lo No! Here's the slushees.
Oh, my phone! My phone! I know you've got bigger issues right now, but just keep in mind you owe me $3.
25.
Guys, we have an emergency! Guys! Oh, my God, are you okay? What happened to your nose? He was texting while walking.
Oh, sure.
Classic Logan.
Forget me! Just save my phone! It's been in a terrible accident! It's barely clinging to life! Do something! All right! Incoming, people! Let's be sharp! Remove the case! Stat! Oh, I've never seen it caseless before.
It's non-responsive! That's what my teacher calls me.
Save my phone! Shh! I'm not getting a beat.
I think it's time to pull the plug.
- Call it.
- We can't call it.
It's broken.
No! There's got to be something we can do! I love this phone more than life itself! Plus, I have another year on the contract.
We need rice! That's for a wedding.
This is a funeral.
No, no, no, it says if you put a wet phone in rice for 72 hours, it'll dry out.
It could come back to life! I should've put Goldie the Goldfish in rice.
Oh, great.
Now I want sushi.
Focus! Now what? We've done all we can.
Now we just wait and play Foosball? Yeah.
Yeah, let's do it.
This is torture! How long has it been? Seven minutes.
What?! If you pull through, I will treat you better.
I will never take you into the bathroom again, I promise.
Logan, let's not make promises we can't keep.
Everyone knows you're a toilet texter.
Why did this happen? Just when I met this great girl.
She's probably waiting for my text right now.
Oh, yeah, she's just sitting by her phone, counting the minutes.
Ugh, how am I gonna make it 72 hours? Why do bad things happen to good people?! Don't be so dramatic.
It's just three days.
Yeah, right.
Like you could go that long.
Sure, I could.
My life does not revolve around my phone.
I can go three days without it.
We all could.
Right, guys? - Absolutely.
- Without a doubt.
No question.
So what do you guys say? We give up our phone for the next 72 hours? - No way.
- Not a chance.
Never gonna happen.
It'd be a lot easier if we're all in this together.
But I guess when the chips are down, nobody really cares about Logan.
I get it.
You're just trying to guilt us into one of those stupid group pacts.
They're not stupid.
Delia, remember how much better we made you feel after you blew out your birthday candles and lost your eyebrows? Okay, fine.
I'll give up my phone.
It was very sweet of you guys to shave your eyebrows for me.
A little freaky though.
You only had to look at me.
I had to look at all of you.
If she's in, I'm in.
Well, good luck to you guys.
Jasmine? What? Four's a pact.
Isn't four a pact? Four can be a pact.
Fine, I'm in.
That's your hairbrush.
Thank you.
All right, I can't text Haley, but I know she hangs out at the mall.
I say we rush back there right after school.
You in? Garrett? What exactly are you doing? Sorry, but without a phone, I don't know what to do with my hands.
I'm trying to send a text through my sandwich.
I'm freaking out, man! - Are you Delia? - Yeah.
What was all that? That was a singing telegram from my boyfriend.
Wait, you have a boyfriend?! Wait, they still have singing telegrams?! How come we've never met him? Because I've never met him.
We're text-only.
How did you get a boyfriend you've never met? He was a wrong number.
That turned out to be oh-so-right.
Well look at this.
Whoa, you got a "C" on a test?! Lucky! I don't think she's happy about it.
No, I'm not.
Without my phone, I couldn't set my alarm, so I overslept.
Without my reminder app, I forgot there was a quiz.
Ugh! Well, it sounds like you want to call off the pact, Lindy.
If that's what you want, we'll join your no-pact pact.
No.
I'm just a little stressed because I didn't get my daily affirmation text, and clearly that's not coming either! It's going to be okay, okay? It's going to be okay, okay? Not the same! Okay.
Jas, what is all that? Well, I noticed you've been having trouble with the pact, so I brought you everything you'd have as an app on your phone.
A camera, a boombox, a thermometer, a calendar, a calculator I am not carrying around all that stuff all the time.
Yeah, I see your point.
But I also hate to see you struggle.
But what choice do we have? I mean, we're not going to call off the pact are we? No.
A pact is a pact.
Come on, Jas.
It's no good unless we all stick to it.
You know that.
Yes, I do.
You're right.
A pact is a pact.
We totally got this, you guys! It's a pact! Yeah, this isn't happening.
My precious.
What are you doing? Reading something called a newspaper.
Did you know that the stories that were on your phone yesterday are on this thing today? I still can't figure out how to zoom, though.
Come on, man.
I need you to keep your eyes peeled.
Help me find Haley.
We're looking for a cute brunette with a ponytail.
Are you sure it's worth all this trouble? I mean, maybe she wasn't that into you.
Maybe she was just being nice.
I'm telling you, we had an instant connection.
And I cannot get that ponytail out of my head.
Hey, there she is! Haley, I am so glad I f Found a hipster guy that looks just like you! Okay, Watson, as understandable as your fear of hipsters is They're dirty by choice! By choice! You don't have to tell me.
I say if you're not a lumberjack, buy a beard trimmer.
Hey, stop trying to make me forget what we're talking about here.
Wait, what were we talking about here? Why I was in the fountain.
No.
Oh! Why were you in the fountain?! I told you, I was trying to find a girl.
Please, I've been looking for one since before you were born.
You rarely find them in fountains.
How am I gonna find Haley? I mean, there was no sign of her anywhere, and it's still a day before we can try turning on my phone.
Logan, it's all right.
Chill.
Be calm.
We're okay without our phones.
Wow.
The last time I saw you this calm, you had just run into a goalpost and were unconscious.
Good times.
Seriously, since when are you this relaxed? You're Garrett.
Oh, you're thinking of phone-Garrett, the guy whose life revolved around texting and games.
No, no, I'm phoneless Garrett.
I do things like talk to people I've never talked to before.
Hey, Roberta.
I like to watch sunsets just because.
This morning, I noticed birds outside my window.
And they were happy birds, not angry birds.
I'm finally noticing the world around me.
Did you know I have a younger brother? Oh, Delia! I'm melting! I need water! I need water! Just wring out your armpits.
Can I borrow that? Yeah.
Ohh What happened to you? I'm melting.
Without my phone, I had no idea about this heat wave.
Come on! Eighty-five degrees this time of year?! I know.
This is ridiculous.
How are we supposed to survive without our phones? I can't do it, I tell ya.
I can't do it! It's too hard! Lindy, are you all right? Yeah.
Yeah, I'm fine.
I'm just blowing off some steam.
I know.
We can see it coming out of your armpits.
Are you sure you want to go through with this phone thing? I'll be fine.
And you know what? I'm fixing that "C" on my test.
For extra credit, I'm gonna go down to the science museum and write a report on the new exhibit.
Does anybody know the best way to get downtown? Just close your eyes and picture yourself there.
It will find you.
Did he run into the goalpost again? Hi, I'm Delia.
I know this is a little awkward 'cause it's the first time we've seen each other, but I think it could be fun.
So am I more beautiful than you ever imagined? You're not Zane, are you? Hey.
Who here's my boyfriend?! Boomtown! Right here.
You're the one I've been texting with? But you're so little.
I prefer "fun-sized.
" So what up, boo? Boo? You seem young enough to be scared by the word "boo.
" You know what I'm not scared of? Raven hair, black-rimmed glasses, and a face full of sugar.
Or the dark.
Anymore.
Whoa, look at that! You see her?! No.
Twenty percent off cargo shorts.
I don't care if they're out of style.
I like to carry a lot of stuff.
Garrett, focus.
We have to find Haley.
Relax, brother.
Breathe positive.
I can't, okay? I don't I want her to think I'm the kind of guy who gets a girl's number, says he'll text her, and then blows her off.
Attention, Evanston Galleria shoppers.
We have a missing girl.
She answers to the name Haley; has brown hair, brown eyes, and a great ponytail; and looks nothing like a dude from in front.
If you see her or know her phone number Drop the mic, Watson.
I've got pepperspray, a taser, and handcuffs.
Sounds like a lot of stuff to carry.
Do you know cargo shorts are 20% off? You feeling this? 'Cause I am.
I think this relationship's got legs.
Do yours even touch the ground? Whoa, my eyes are up here.
Look, Zane, you seem like a really nice, young kid, but there's no possible way this could work Okay, slow your roll, Deelz.
Did you or did you not enjoy our texts? Yeah, and I'm starting to realize why you never sent one after 8:00.
Bedtime ain't nothin' but a number, boo.
Look.
I'm sorry, Zane, but you're just not what I expected.
You're not what I expected either.
You're much more beautiful.
Well I guess I could stay for one smoothie.
It's on me.
Have a muffin, too.
Just got this in a card from Nana.
It's taking so long.
We should've used instant rice.
I feel terrible for Haley.
She must be really confused.
She is so sweet.
So sweet.
It would be so much easier if I had a picture of Haley.
I could show it to people in the mall.
Give me a second, brother.
What are you doing? Well, now that my nose is out of that phone, I'm discovering talents I didn't even know I had.
What kind of sport do you think she likes? I don't know.
Bowling? Ah.
Here you go.
Ow! Ow! Ow! Lindy? Don't tell me you're a dirty hipster now! I tried to go to the science museum, but without my transit app, I missed the bus, ran after it, tripped and spilled everything in my backpack! And then it got dark, and I didn't have my flashlight app! And then I rolled down a hill and twisted my ankle! I've got to post a picture of this.
But I can't because of course I don't have my phone.
This is so hard! Right, guys? Curse this pact! Wait, what was that? Did somebody take their phone? Did somebody break the pact? Fine, it was It was me.
It was Garrett.
Yeah, I always wanted to learn bird calls, and now I have the time.
So it sounds like you had a very interesting meeting with Zane.
Yeah.
It wasn't what I was expecting Wait, how did you know about that? Oh, I got a text.
A what? A text book.
On body language.
And I can tell by the way you're standing with your arms crossed You got a text message, didn't you? You've been using your phone! What?! How dare you! I am no pact-breaker.
And to think I shaved my eyebrows for you.
If you had my body language textbook, you would know how upset I am.
It's Franken-Lindy! How are people supposed to know there is a severe thunderstorm outside if you don't have a weather app, a news app, or any app?! What?! Haven't you ever seen a phoneless person before? All right, Lindy's losin' it! I want my phone back! I admit it! I can't take it! I need my phone! That's it.
Seventy-two hours.
We did it! So soon? Told you I could handle it.
I t was really hard, but it was worth it to support Logan.
I know I made fun of the pact.
But it really does strengthen us and proves what a strong bond we have and what a tight-knit group we really are.
Sorry, Jasmine can't talk right now.
She's being proven a pact-breaker.
Watson, you're not allowed to put anything on the mall walls.
Even those delightful caricatures.
What's your favorite sport, Doug? I can get one for you.
Oh, I'm really more of a board game man.
The whole family gathers around and we Knock it off.
Now hit the pavement before you end up on the no-shop list.
Show him the way out.
I know where the exit is.
Stop spinning that sign in my face! Logan, the seventy-two hours are up! We did it! Finally! All right, guys, come on! All right, moment of truth.
It's alive! It's alive! Oh, Haley texted me! Aw, she said it was great to meet me.
And she's really into me! And she called me a snot bucket! "I will not be treated like this"? No worries, I'll text her right now and smooth all this over.
Oh, another one! "You'll be sorry you ever messed with me.
My brother is going to get you.
" Her brother's gonna get me what? A new phone? He blew me off, then he put up all these creepy pictures of me all over the mall! And you hate bowling! I know! But it is a very good caricature.
There he is with his friends! Which one's Logan? Seriously, sign-spinner? Nobody messes with my sister.
Wait, dude, hear me out.
It is not what you Whoa! Logan, are you okay? No! I'm wet! Very wet! Oh, my phone! It's drenched! Poor Logan.
Guys, come here.
Come sit down.
He's wet.
He's embarrassed.
We can't just let him go through this alone.
My wallet! My keys! What do you guys say? New pact? Let's get in there with him.
Oh, come on.
You're kidding me.
No, Jasmine.
That's what friends do for each other.
That's how pacts work.
Fine.
On three.
One two three! Now, we're even.
Aw.
We've all really missed hanging out, too.
Hey, babe.
Got you a smoothie.
Thanks, boo.
Boo? Boo who? Who are you? I'm her man.
That's who I am.
Who are you? Isn't he a little young for you? Age ain't nothin' but a number.
Deal with it.
Oh, forgot the straws.
Be right back, boo.
Seriously, Delia, what is this? Relax.
I'm babysitting.
For ten dollars an hour, let the kid think what he wants.
Boomtown! Cha-ching! So, gang, what are we doing tonight? I'm good till 6:30.