Monsters vs. Aliens (2013) s01e11 Episode Script

MVA MVA Monsters vs.
Aliens It's us vs.
them Foe vs.
friend Brain vs.
B.
O.
B.
It's a super-freaky job Oh, yeah, it's freaky.
MVA Monsters vs.
Aliens Monsters vs.
Aliens Monsters vs.
Aliens MVA 1x14 - It Got Out of Hand Hello? Coming.
- Did you knock? - No.
Hmm.
Curious.
I don't understand what happened.
My calculations were perfect.
Well, sometimes you do make a six that kind of looks like a four.
More like four-get about it! It was me, Doc.
I switched beakers on you.
April fools', my friend! Ba-boom.
Aw, no.
- April 1st.
- April fools' day? Okay, I'll take care of the Turkey.
Susan, you do the stuffing.
Link, cranberry sauce fresh, not canned.
But I like the canned better.
It keeps the shape of the can, even the ridges.
Fine.
And Dr.
C? Hey! Get your head in the game.
The nine hours of football we're gonna be watching You're celebrating the wrong holiday, B.
O.
B.
April fools' is about playing harmless pranks on people.
Pranks? Yeah, right.
That's Valentine's day.
Okay, while that roasts, I'm going to be punkin' chunkin'.
Poor, confused B.
O.
B.
- Really? - Classic.
I wonder if I can just lock myself in my room until tomorrow.
Aw, come on, Susan.
Don't be such a prank crank.
Link and I have a long-standing April fools' day competition.
I won last year, after I convinced him the base had been infected by a zombie virus.
I had my victory preserved as a stereoscopic slide for posterity.
I have raccoon eyes, don't I? But you gotta admit, Doc, my foam gag slams the zombie thing.
You got me, Link.
I have to say, you're taking this pretty well.
You're usually a lot more competitive Indeed, I am.
I knew you were going to sabotage my experiment.
So this morning, I replaced your shampoo with a gravity exacerbator.
Can't lift head, but feels so silky.
How heavy is he going to get? Pretty heavy.
I've got you.
Ooh-hoo, right through the coolant tanks in the sub-basement.
And this is why I don't like April fools' day.
Silky! Yeah, it starts small, like, "ha ha, isn't it funny? I put toothpaste in your shoes.
" Then one thing leads to another, and before you know it, it gets out of hand.
Pardon, but I need that to make the marshmallow topping on the yams.
Man, I wish today was already over.
Well, that's simple enough.
Behold the time portal.
Just enter your target date here, flip this lever there, and it'll be April 2nd.
Right, so on April fools', you expect me to believe you have a time machine just sitting around that you've never mentioned before? I can see how this might look a little suspicious.
I do.
Hmm, certainly would be nice to skip this whole day of pranking.
Whoa, hold on there, Suze.
You're the one who's always telling us we can't take the easy way out.
Really? I don't remember saying Yes, I believe "stick-to-itiveness" is one of your common talking points.
- Along with "gumption.
" - Stick-to-itiveness maybe, but I have never used the word gumption.
Ooh, speaking of gumption, I stuck bubble gum under the left throttle of Monger's jet pack.
His jet pack! Nicely done, my amphibious chum.
Let's check it out.
- Uh, you first, Doc.
- Age before beauty.
- I got both.
- Guys.
You don't need to worry about the old bucket-of-water trick.
These doors slide up and down.
She's wet.
Antigravity water bucket? Yes, it does utilize antigravity to stay aloft.
But I have named it the Infinity Pail.
A super-condenser soaks up atmospheric moisture to refill the pail again and again.
Ooh! That baby can prank people Go forth, oh, pail of infinite jest and make mischief.
Forget stick-to-itiveness.
April 2nd Here I come! Huh? Whoa.
It's only been one day.
What could've happened? Dr.
Cockroach? Susan? The prank, Susan.
- It was the infernal prank.
- A prank destroyed the base? Indeed Oh, should have listened to you, Susan.
It got out of hand.
I even put an eye out.
Go back.
Stop the prank.
- Which one? - It's on the list.
Wow, that's a lot of pranks.
Save us, Susan.
Save us! Don't worry, guys.
I'll fix it.
I'm going to stop the doomsday prank.
As soon as I find it.
He really needs to put a seat belt in that thing.
Ah! Seriously? - Thank you.
Your pen.
- No! Susan! Way to ruin an awesome prank.
That's the idea.
Pen prank foiled.
Check.
Wait, how did you know the pen was loaded? I'll tell you later.
If there is a later.
General Monger, this briefing was supposed to start 15 minutes ago! Apologies, Mr.
President.
Jet pack trouble.
What the haystack? Excuse me, that was meant for the General.
Yeah, I got that.
Ugh, forget about your jet pack.
You've got gastrointestinal issues.
It's a stealth whoopee cushion.
- Right.
- Right.
Okay, next sneezing gas.
Susan, glad I found you.
Kind of a delicate situation.
I know you had your heart set on making the stuffing, but certain gluten issues have recently come to light B.
O.
B.
, now's not a good time.
Sneezing gas! Ow.
Okay, know what? If it's that important to you, stay with the stuffing.
Exploding gum, check.
Oh! Itching powder, check.
I know we've had our differences, but put 'er there! No! Aah oof! Mm, sub-atomic hand buzzer? - Yes.
- Nice.
Don't pull it! Oh.
Not so bad.
Firing confetti targeting missiles.
Gah! Why would anyone make such a thing? Oh, what a day.
But it's over.
It's April 2nd.
We made it! We're all safe.
- April fools'! - April fools'! What? I don't understand.
This whole day was one giant prank.
A brilliantly conceived elaborate hoax made up of ingenious props and devious holograms.
So the list was a fake? You made me do all those pranks to myself? Bingo.
Admit it, Suze.
We got you but good.
Whoo-hoo! We are the Presidents of Pranktown.
Ooh.
Warning! Danger! Danger! Danger! All monsters report to the war room.
Immediately! It's bad, monsters.
Disastrous.
Some kind of flying bucket's been dumping water into the ruptured coolant tanks.
- The Infinity Pail! - Water in coolant? That's bad? The super-charged freezing capacity of the bases' coolant tanks combined with an endless supply of water could lead to a Deep freeze super-storm will send North America into a new ice age in five So, really bad? Four Doc, there must be something you can do! There's no time! Three I'm assuming our frozen doom is thanks to you lunkheads and your pranking.
Two - Yes! - Yes! -One.
Enjoy the new ice age.
- No! - No! Doc, I've been through an ice age.
It's bad.
And we have condemned our friends and colleagues to that wretched fate.
Not to mention the rest of North America.
If only the time portal actually worked.
We could go back and not prank anybody.
- I'd say that's lesson learned.
- Uh, what? What is going on? April fools! Had the eggheads reprogram your hologram to scare some sense into you two jokers.
The truth is, I love April fool's day! - You do? - Of course.
In third grade, I convinced the whole class that there was an alien invasion! Which is kind of ironic now that I think about it.
Anyway, I knew exactly what was going on the whole time.
I played along to lure you into my prank.
I even got the General to help me do it.
Nobody messes with my jet pack! The best pranks are the ones you never see coming.
Well played, Susan.
You are the April fools' champion.
Thank you.
I think it may be time to amend our April fools' tradition.
Yeah, it's not as fun as it used to be, you know? - It always gets out of hand.
- Now, who wants pie? - You know I do.
- They look delicious, B.
O.
B.
Happy Valentine's day! 1x15 - The Sound of Fear Code zebra! Scramble the jets! Roll the tanks! We've got an intruder! All monsters topside, A-S-A and P.
Hold the line, guys.
No telling what kind of nightmarish abomination we're facing.
Though I gotta admit, "little old lady" was way, way, way down the list.
War cry! Uh, I'll be over here.
Ma'am.
Ms.
Klangpopper? Someone's appearance has certainly changed.
- Yes, the mutation - The moustache.
Your lip is in ruins, Herbert.
- "Herbert"? - Doctor C do you know this woman? Yes.
She was my second grade teacher and Nemesis.
Headmistress Klangpopper, elementary educator.
General W.
R.
Monger, base commander.
Now we got the pleasantries in our rearviews, tell me why you violated my secret base.
No choice.
I've uncovered a mysterious gap in Herbert's transcript.
No You couldn't have.
Not after all these years.
Did you honestly believe I wouldn't notice you dashed out on your second grade singing recital? You didn't for several decades.
Besides, no no one cares about that now! I-I have a three degrees in advanced mad sciences.
Then you should be able to do the math.
If I revoke your grade school diploma Then my middle school years are void.
And so is Hour high school diploma.
Which means My college degree is cancelled.
And then P.
H.
-De-nied! Congratulations, "mister" Herbert Cockroach.
You've flunked life.
You mean the Doc isn't a Doc? Top mark, miss.
Gold star.
Oh, gosh, thanks.
I was always popular with my teachers.
And not so much with your fellow students.
- Just a guess.
- Yeah, like that wasn't cool.
Can I help it if I'm a shining star? General, please.
End this madness.
Frankly, Doc er mister Cockroach, I like what Ms.
Klangpopper is saying.
General Monger, what are you saying? I'm saying make melody or lose your science license.
Yes.
Sing, Herbert.
Sing! Sing! Sing! But I-I-I can't.
Guys, that thing with the toilet paper happened again.
Aw, B.
O.
B.
, we've been through this at least a hundred times.
That B.
O.
B.
, darn it all.
He just can't be taught.
Excuse me? "Can't be taught"? Everyone can be taught! You just need the proper teacher.
I don't know.
B.
O.
B.
's pretty hopeless.
Not true.
I learned the alphabet.
"A," "Q," 5, nose, dancing-robot and zoom! See? This desperate creature needs a professional! Well, if anybody can teach B.
O.
B.
, it'd be you, Ms.
Klangpopper.
By blood, toil, tears, and sweat, he will learn.
Looks like you're hitting the books, buddy.
Am I ever! - Stupid books! - We'll leave you to it then.
B.
O.
B.
's buying us time.
Grab Dr.
C and run! Dumb books! I'll teach you to teach me! No! Without mad science, I'm nothing! Nothing! I'm just saying I always thought - his first name was "Doctor.
" - Really, Link? And he just happens to also be a Doctor? Hey, his last name is Cockroach, and he just happens to also be a cockroach.
Boom.
Name the Capital of the United States.
Okay, let's call it Pete.
No, no, no, wait, wait.
Donny.
Donny U.
S.
Jackson, Jr.
Nailed it.
So we've got to get Doc - Herb.
- Over his stage fright.
It's worse than stage fright, Susan.
Much, much worse.
I genuinely cannot sing.
Oh, come on.
Everyone can sing.
Oh? Observe.
Doh Re Mi.
It burns, it burns.
Fa - So, that's enough of that.
- Told you.
Let's try fractions.
If we divide this pie into Nice.
What kind of fractions was that? Blueberry? Everyone can be taught.
Light bulb! Susan, you rocked karaoke night, so how about this you stand behind a curtain and sing while Doc moves his lips.
Boom, singing! Whoa, I do not like cheating.
Another thing the other kids in school just loved about me.
- I agree with Susan.
- Thank you.
But not her mamby pamby teacher's pet morality.
Hey! Your plan is too low tech, Link.
Where's the fun? Where's the mad science? Ah, here it is.
Uh! What are you doing to me? I've reversed your subatomic structure, causing you to shrink instead of grow.
- Change me back! - Can't.
But fret not! Hey! Mere minutes from now, you shall return to normal.
Ew.
Do you ever floss? Focus, nano Susan.
Row, row, row your boat on three.
Row, row, row your boat? Something wrong with this century? Ba ba ba! Now One, two, three.
Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily life is but a dream Well, the voice is a little on the girly side So sorry! But you work with what you've got.
Way to beat the system, Doc! And shining star.
Um, I thinkI think I swallowed Susan.
- Not! Not! - She's not coming out.
Still not working.
Maybe if we wait long enough she'll come out, you know, the other way? Ew! Make him hurl! I'm afraid we have bigger problems.
Maybe for you.
Your subatomic restructuring was only temporary.
In ten minutes, you'll revert to normal size.
And thus my head will explode.
Still not going the other way! - So how'd I do? - I'm on my sixth red pen.
You spelled your own name with two "O"s.
Way to go, Boob.
If I sing a prolonged series of very specific auditory tones, that might eject you from my esophagus.
You are going to sing me out? You? The irony is not lost on me, Susan.
"X marks the spot"? The showstopper from Tic Tac Toe, the musical.
I hate that show! That song is nauseating! Let us hope so.
For I must sing it now, note for note.
Our very lives depend on it.
All the confidence in the world, Doc.
You're gonna nail this.
But if you don't, can I have your thing that goes vzzzzzz, vzzzzzz, vzzzzzz? What's that thing called? It's cool.
Breathe in, breathe out.
Perhaps a simple art project.
All you need to do is glue the macaroni to the can.
There is absolutely no wrong way to aah! Help! Help! I did it wrong! Ms.
Klngpuffr? You here? Enough.
I admit defeat.
Not everyone can be taught.
So we're all learning something today.
Oop! They say cheating's just a game and winning's all that ma I-I can't do it.
Sing! I can't control this much longer! You've gotta sing, Doc! You don't have a choice.
Yes, Herbert.
You don't have a choice.
Time to sing or get off the pot.
Here we go.
They say cheating's just a game and winning's all that matters but winning's not so sweet if my honor is in tatters.
I thought my plan so clever certain no one would suspect but you saw me erase your center "O" and substitute my "X" mama told me cheating's not the right way to go that's no way to win at life let alone Tic Tac and Toe Ah.
- Uh! Stop! - Whoa, whoa! Bring it on home, Doc.
That's no way to win at life Let alone Tic Tac and Toe Whoa, whoa, whoa I have never needed a shower more than this moment.
- Did I pass? - You were off-key, flat, and for some reason, you saw fit to regurgitate a full-grown woman.
I'm giving you a "D" minus minus.
Which is a passing grade! Huzzah! Looks like you're back in the mad science game.
Way to go, Herbert! Excuse me, my name is Dr.
Cockroach.