Shoestring (1979) s01e11 Episode Script

Stop for a moment, think.
All the world's great religions show us there is no virtue in material possessions.
Buy a record and save your life.
You'll never regret it.
Maddy! Can I have a word with you? Please.
We've said it all before and I've got work to do.
But this isn't work.
You're throwing your whole life away.
Not my real life, Mother.
Not the bit that counted.
Please, come home with me and let's talk it over.
There's no point.
You don't understand.
With you, it's job, money, job.
Look up at the stars, Mother.
How much do they earn? How much did they cost? But it doesn't mean that you have to give everything up.
All your money? To these people? I think, freaks is a word you understand.
I'm one of them now.
I'm a Star Daughter.
Goodbye, Mother.
- Anything wrong? - There most certainly is.
I don't want my daughter involved with your cult.
That's a little harsh, Mrs Hopkins.
We are not a cult.
We are a growing movement filling a genuine need in people's hearts and souls.
What's wrong with the church? The church sends people into eternity with a millstone of possessions round their necks.
We know that this is not the true pathway to peace.
I don't care what gibberish you believe, but I won't have you brainwashing my daughter.
Maddy is old enough to make her own decisions, surely.
I'll do everything I can to get her out of your grip.
- Maddy? - I said goodbye, Mother.
- The disciples had the same problem.
Sure.
- Maddy all right? - She walked on by.
She's all right.
If you'd like to call round, Mr Shoestring, let's say about 7.
30, we can have a chat about it, and see if there's anything you could do to help with the problem.
Either you know her problem or you aren't a private eye, far less a private ear.
I don't think she's very interested in eyes and ears, Sonia.
It's only a few weeks and they'll have her money.
And they're phonies, I know it.
There's something funny going on with these people.
They are too good to be true.
All smiles, like sharks.
She's only 21, Maddy, very impressionable.
They call themselves Starshines.
- Eddie Shoestring, isn't it? Yes.
Peter Rayburn, I'm the news editor.
Shouldn't you have a green eyeshade? We've given them up now, we all wear toupees instead.
Eddie, this new service you're giving our listeners, sounds very exciting.
You wouldn't think so, if you listened to this tape.
- Yeah, I know, I played it through.
- You did? We're a bit thin today, I got a little story off it.
Nothing that will be of any use to you, but if you do stumble onto what looks like a good tale, you'll let me know, won't you? I thought this tape was confidential.
That's what we keep telling the public, for my ears only.
Maybe I should explain, the principle is news has priority.
When it comes to the crunch, the news output from this radio station and its feed to the network takes first place to everything else for facilities and information.
That means you can break the confidence on this tape? Oh, we will check it out, of course.
Look, I was hired to do a job, it's called private investigation.
Now, I can't make much of a go of that if you're gonna shove out people's personal problems with the cornflakes.
Next time you wanna listen to a tape, you ask me and nicely.
What's so special about you? I've been investigating stories for 20 years.
My reporters are all trained investigators.
- We're the ones who do it properly.
Of course, you do.
Just because you spend - Peter, I have been looking for you.
How do you want me to handle the tourist hotel business? In your usual diplomatic way, my love.
Tell them we hate all tourists' guts? Xenophobic Radio West.
Oh, Eddie Shoestring.
- Hello, Xena.
- Yes, you've got a funny name too.
Is she one of your trained news hounds? Correction, a bitch of the first order.
It had to happen sooner or later, I suppose.
Peter was never very keen on you doing this.
He's a good, hard newsman.
They do like to keep everything to themselves.
He makes me feel every time I get a job, I should check with him.
No, you answer to me.
On the other hand, if you did come across a strong local news story But if someone rings for a private inquiry, and a reporter turns up Point taken.
I won these in a medal competition last week.
New American balls.
High velocity, supposed to add 20 yards to your drive.
Don, I'm through unless you tell that news editor to stop treading on my line.
Oh, you play the game then? I wanna play the game my own way, without interference.
Otherwise, I just pack the whole thing in.
Leave it to me.
You got anything interesting on the go then? Just a twinkle of a case.
A man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.
I'd like you to read this.
It will help you.
Thank you.
- Why don't you buy a Starshine record? - You think I should? You'll learn how to free yourself from the grip of things and touch infinity.
You seem to be gripping those things pretty hard, why don't you ask infinity to give you a hand? If you buy one, my pile will be lighter.
- All right, then.
How much? - £2.
50.
But it could change your life.
I know, it could.
£2.
50, that's infinity to me, at the moment.
But we offer you the peace, contentment, sincerity.
That's very kind of you.
That's a very big offer.
Infinity is the biggest there is.
For £2.
50, you get the key, but if you want to see the riches of your inner life, then you have to give up everything.
- You won't regret it.
- I'm sure I won't.
10, 20, 30, 40 50, £2.
And your mum would like to talk to you.
- Who are you? - Shoestring.
She asked me to have a word with you.
I see.
You've come to put the pressure on me, have you? No, not at all, I have come to put a few questions to you.
Sorry, I'm not here to talk about myself.
- I'm not important.
- But you are to your mum.
You're wasting your time, Mr Shoestring.
Well, maybe.
I'll tell you what I'll do.
I'll listen to this and make up my own mind.
Okay? You all right? Peace, freedom, contentment.
You can touch infinity, did you know that? Usher in a world without lawyers.
What does the police computer have to say about Starshine? - What the hell are you talking about? - It's the same old problem.
Rich girl wants to lead a life of poverty.
She joined this bunch of people forming a religious cult.
- Oh, Starshine? - How did you know? She intends to give them all her money in a few weeks when she ripens to maturity at the age of 21.
- How much? - £15,OOO.
Left to her by her uncle in a trust.
Her mother is very upset.
It's her money.
She can do what she likes with it.
My God, what I'd give for a penetrating legal mind like yours.
I suppose, I'll have to settle for your body.
No, emphatically.
You would look silly in it.
Hmm.
At first, having listened to the music of the spheres, - I have to take myself off to infinity.
- Where's that? It's a place where they observe the universe through the holes in the roof.
- Yes.
- Is this the Starshine head office? It's our chief dwelling in this town.
Would it be possible to speak to Maddy, please? - What about? - Well, I'm a friend and a patron.
She sold me your latest single.
- Sorry.
- It's all right, don't worry.
Just put up a sign for meteorites.
- Oh, it's you.
- Hello.
I thought we might have a chat.
It's completely pointless.
Don't get me wrong.
I'm very interested in the movement.
I've listened to the record and I'd like to talk about it.
Well, it must have something, if you're prepared to give all your money away.
Come in.
Is this a building firm or a religion? Most people bring their original skills to the movement.
You work late, don't you? Oh, we always work on until dusk.
That's the natural thing.
Oh, till the stars come out.
Don't mock, Mr Shoestring.
Brothers and Sisters, this is Eddie.
- Good evening.
Hello.
My mother sent him to make me change my mind.
- Well, that's not exactly the truth.
- Oh, no.
Now he says he's listened to the Starshine record and it's made him feel good.
In other words, he's come to snoop.
This is strange, how people seem to resent anyone who decides to resist the lure of the material possessions.
Look around you, Eddie.
We haven't got anything to hide, because we haven't got anything.
We lead a very simple existence.
What I don't understand is, if it's so simple, why do you need your uncle's money? We need to expand.
We need more records, more houses and more books to give away.
But isn't that bit of a copout? I mean, people work, pay taxes, presumably subsidising you.
Only at this stage.
As more and more people join the movement, there will be less and less need to use material things at the sort of level we do now in this country and the more support we'll get from the universal mind.
A direct energy tap if you like.
So what do we all become, sky pilots flying on sky petrol? Yes, a million light years a gallon.
All together? Why not? Are you frightened of the other human bodies? Not one to one, no.
Any more than that, I find it a bit distracting.
That's because you want to possess somebody else.
You're worried that you might lose out to the pack leader.
Ah! So it's universal body as well as universal mind, isn't it? Not in that way.
So you would rather have all this than a bit of comfort? Yes, because we want to.
And so that we can fix the houses.
We resell them and the profit goes to the movement.
Nobody's forcing you to give your money away, are they? No, of course not, But £15,OOO is quite a lot.
I feel really sorry for you, you know, Eddie.
You seem such a nice, straight guy, and yet you're so clogged up with cynicism.
- Are you happy? - I don't really know.
If you were happy, you would know.
I'm happy.
Very happy.
I've got everything I want.
Everything.
I wish we could help you along the same path.
Beautiful, beautiful Miss Madeline Bell taking us back on Soul Sound, from deep within her very own special soul.
Why do we employ DJs with limited vocabularies? Probably because they've got such lovely voices.
It's the echo that does it, inside their skulls.
Good night.
I'm going home to learn Spanish.
Adios.
Radio West Soul Sound, which reminds me, have you heard of the Salvation Army, they walk on their heels to save their souls? Yes? No? Okay, fine.
Let it go through you, Mystic Moves.
Come on in, Eddie.
If you want my job, you can have it.
He likes Mozart.
Wants to die young like Mozart.
With these jokes, he might make it.
I won't keep you a minute.
Have you ever seen this label before? Ah! Camelot records.
Camelot, Camelot.
Not an established label.
Just a mo A slight echo there maybe.
I do hate to mention it, sunshine, but Mystic Moves is stuck in a groove.
Hold it.
We want to thank the British Museum for the loan of that record.
Sorry if you're dizzy.
One of those nights.
- The disc's a demo.
- Amateur? Some demos are so amateur, they make an Aboringine sing-song sound like grand opera.
A group gets together, hires a studio, lays down a disc with a short run of pressings, then they go around boring DJs, producers and record companies with them.
I tell you, I'm haunted by the haunting rhythms of diabolical demos.
I mean, this lot can call themselves stars.
You wouldn't, with your wealth of totally trivial local knowledge, happen to remember who Camelot are? - Hmm.
Huckle.
- What? Jim Huckle.
Runs his own studio in a converted barge.
Does everything from church hall disco tapes to supermarket blurbs for baked beans.
Unlike a lot of people in this business, he really is American.
Shoestring? Well, that's different.
- You must be Country and Western? - Oh, no, I hate that stuff.
I'm Radio Western, actually.
- Is Mr Huckle busy? - He's recording in the studio.
It sounds like a big occasion? Yes, it's canned crowd appreciation from the last Gloucester Festival.
Go on in.
He's on his own.
The singers are on tape too.
- Are you sure he is in there? - Quite sure.
Yeah? I'm sorry to interrupt the festival.
Are you Mr Huckle? What are you selling? I just wondered if you could spare me five minutes.
I don't want to be educated by encyclopaedias.
I can make my own music.
I got a car and insurance up to here.
I own my own apartment and this studio.
- Did I leave anything out? - I don't think so.
I mean, like you, I'm completely against material possessions.
- What's your line of business? - Starshine business.
- Come through.
- Thank you.
Anne, my visitor was not announced.
His name is Eddie Shoestring from some radio company.
Shoestring, huh? Would that have anything to do with shoe leather and looking through keyholes maybe? Maybe.
Glad to put a face to the voice, Mr Shoestring.
What can I do for you? I'm interested in the disc you made for the Starshine people.
2002.
My code name for it.
What do you want to know? Where I stole the astral soundtrack from? - Trade secret.
- Well, you can keep the secret.
- You can keep the record.
- But, just the same, I would like to know how it was financed? I mean, you must have pressed a considerable number.
Sure, I did.
They are good customers, our star struck friends.
They are a pleasant bunch of people.
A bunch of schmucks in smocks.
Let's not beat around the goddamn bush.
What exactly is your interest in them? I'm trying to find out the centre of their universe, who runs them.
As far as I know, they run themselves.
Yeah, but who approached you? I mean, did they pay you cash, cheque or what? Hey, take it easy.
I said, "How can I help you?" Not, "How can I open my books?" For all I know, you could be working for a tax inspector.
On a phone-in.
I mean, do I look like the kind of person who would be friends with the tax man? If I knew what friends of the tax guys looked like, I wouldn't have been fined the year before last.
Look, I'm not asking you to disclose your business details.
I'm not interested in that.
What I'm interested in is Starshine.
Why? What's the fascination? Well, they are spreading fast.
They're always on the street somewhere.
All they do is keep telling me how I'd be happier if I was broke.
I thought perhaps you could give me something more to go on.
Sorry, they may be nuts but, like I said before, they are good customers.
And straight? Where their deal with the studio is concerned, sure.
Just a load of kids doing what they believe in.
If I were you, I would leave them alone to get on with.
- Hello.
- You again.
I'm trying to believe, I'm honest, and I'm working on it.
Said without an ounce of sincerity.
- How many converts have you made today? - Well, I think, we have reached a few.
It would take a long time to cover the world at that rate.
We'll do it.
We have got groups in five towns in the west country.
- Five? - We are only the latest branch.
You never did tell me where this movement started? In a village in the Cotswolds.
We are going there for a retreat this week and to work.
Doing up another house? It's a good way to raise funds.
How many houses have you worked on? On four in this area myself, but they've sold six or seven here.
- That's hardly a social copout, is it? - It certainly isn't.
Good afternoon, sir.
Can I help you? Yes, you have a house in the window.
Oh, we have 18 houses in the window.
Which one are you interested in? The terraced house undergoing modernisation in Martindale Terrace.
Number 23, you mean? Yes, I've been to see the works going on there.
It's a community effort, isn't it? I'm afraid it's under offer.
It says so in the window.
Do you think the offer could fall through? - Could do.
- It was a very quick sale, wasn't it? I mean, it isn't finished yet.
You never had your board outside.
Oh, there is a demand for houses in that terrace.
If it does come on the market again, what sort of price would you be asking? Oh, I'm sorry, once we have accepted an offer, the price becomes a confidential matter.
Does it? But I could have seen the price in the window before you sold it.
I'm sorry but I can't disclose the figure.
- Go on, in the neighbourhood of - We have our reputation.
Yes, of course.
Well, I'll tell you what I'll do, Mrs Holdwing.
I'll write to the vendors and ask them if they have another property on the market.
They're a charity cooperative.
So, it can be difficult to get hold of them.
And they are not on the phone.
Thank you.
You've been very helpful.
Do you think you can find out? Well, we do have a house buying consultant.
Well, the estate agents are called Holdwing and Grace.
- Where will you be? - Studio two.
I have another request.
Don? No luckle with Huckle? No, I think he knows more than he's prepared to say.
You couldn't do me a little favour, could you? Don't tell me, you are hustling for me to play that Starshine stuff.
Nothing so dangerous.
On the other hand On the other hand, what? Well, I thought you could invite them on your show.
Quiz them a little.
Give them a bit of free publicity.
I mean, they couldn't resist that.
Eddie, I suffer enough brain damage in this chair.
Look, I'll spell it out for you.
I think there's a racket going on.
- Right, who's clear? Finally.
Felicity, what are you on? The vicar who has three churches and sends his sermons out on cassette.
He sent one church a sex instruction tape by mistake.
A parishioner said they were a bit shocked, but, fortunately, the batteries ran out before they could get to the really juicy bits.
- You made that up? - Only the quote, the rest is true.
I've got an assignment for you.
Hard, accurate and first.
Goodie, goodie, my batteries are charging.
Eddie Shoestring, Don's tame ferret.
My batteries are fully charged.
He may have stumbled onto a good news story.
I want it checked out right away and I want tape on it, right? Suppose some of it gets tangled on Mr Shoestring's legs? Just make sure you don't get tangled around Shoestring's legs.
Two minutes to news, newsroom.
Two minutes to news.
Ooh, Mr Shoestring, the offer on the house you wanted to know about was £25,OOO.
- That's great.
Thanks, Sonia.
- Ah! Good morning, Eddie.
Hey, I won yesterday.
Cleaned them out.
Those new balls are great.
- Twenty yards on every drive.
- I'm delighted, Don.
I think I've just gained a few yards myself.
Good morning, Sonia.
- Good morning.
Sorry for the intrusion, by the way, but my radio is bust.
That's the trouble with material possessions.
They sometimes let you down.
I'm beginning to feel a teeny bit like a possession myself.
Don't' worry, whenever your radio lets you down, you can borrow mine.
By any possible alternative routes.
Thank you, traffic desk.
And now, here with me in the studio, I have two guests.
Star guests, I should call them.
If you have been out and about on the streets, you probably have seen a lot of people with leaflets and records calling themselves the Starshine people.
Roger Williams and Maddy Hopkins, welcome.
Just who are the Starshines? We are a group, a growing group of people, who have decided to give up the rat race and consumerism, and the futile search for fulfilment in material things.
So, Maddy, you say you go off to your retreat to meet and think.
Where is this? In a lovely village in the Cotswolds.
It's very simple there and you can really feel infinity, you know.
When you look up at the stars, things happen deep down in you.
You feel really cleansed.
So, who is actually the leader of this group? I think, I prefer The Archers.
A very great man called Stephen Steele.
He spent a lot of time travelling around India and Tibet.
The psychic nerve centres, you might call them.
He felt like they got the gist right, but a lot of things wrong.
He made the breakthrough for us.
And where is your guru now? Guru is a rather cheap description.
Remember, he's brought a western mind to bear on the problems of life in western world.
So, where is he? Oh, well, right now, he is in Antarctica.
There's a lot of powerful energy there.
And, who is looking after things while he's away? We do it between us.
Indeed, we do.
So you're off tomorrow to your Cotswolds retreat? Yes, we'll be walking and hitching.
We only use transport for building materials.
Materials? Surely a word you despise.
You won't get us going that way, you know.
Trees to build houses, mud and straw for bricks, these have been the true materials since the beginning of mankind.
Touché.
So, if you are driving tomorrow, why not pick up some Starshine people on the way.
Lovely people.
You're joking, Peter.
There's no mileage in that.
Give me a "sex-change vicar in wife-swap mercy dash" any day.
Yes, well never mind that, just you stick to Eddie Shoestring.
What better than to sign off with your own Starshine record.
Let's hear a bit of that galactic sound.
This is hardly British, Mr Shoestring.
Any more than you are.
Oh, but I am.
My ancestors came from Boston, Lincolnshire.
What are you doing here? Er, looking for something that I didn't get from you.
Right, absolutely right.
And you have no right to be in this studio.
Whereas we have a perfect right to apprehend you and defend ourselves from your brutal attacks before calling the police.
Any more of this and I will lose my police pension.
Sorry.
Well, I can't get you off a charge of breaking and entering.
The entering was all right, it was the breaking I objected to.
Thank you.
It was rather stupid of you.
I suppose I must have been followed.
If you can't conduct an enquiry without getting yourself roughed up, quit the game.
And go back to owing you rent? The money is not important, Eddie.
You should join Starshine.
How the hell am I gonna get you out of this one? I'm depending on a friend at court.
- Mrs Bayliss? - Don't let it affect your swing, Don.
It isn't funny.
We don't pay you to break the bloody law.
You're supposed to uphold it.
Work with it.
Yes, of course.
Now what is it, knees bent, straight left arm head down, keep relaxed.
Too much right hand, you'll hook.
Do you really think those Starshine people fitted you up? - I'm positive.
I'm a white night.
- A what? An astronomer's term when you sit up all night and watch the heavens and see nothing.
They get wiped out by cloud layers.
Similar to the smoke screen they have laid between me and Maddy.
Hello.
Yes, Sonia.
It's for you.
Always is.
Yes? Hello.
Yeah, that will be very nice.
When? Yes, but I don't know where you live.
Hello! It's all right, Mr Shoestring, he won't harm you.
Sure? Is that Mr Steele? Up here, Mr Shoestring.
How nice of you to come.
Won't you sit down? Thank you.
I'm a little bit stiff.
Oh, yes, I heard all about what happened to you at the recording studio last night.
Yes, it wasn't exactly the pathway to peace and tranquillity.
I was very angry indeed with Mr Huckle.
He is no part of our brotherhood, any more than violence is part of our creed, but you did trespass on his property.
Well, he could have saved himself a lot of trouble if he'd given me your address straight away.
Only my closest followers know I'm here.
Yeah, what did you do? Hop on a reindeer straight back from the South Pole.
Mr Shoestring, I've been home for some weeks now, recovering from an illness.
Oh, I'm sorry to hear it.
It's not exactly the best place to convalesce then, is it? An illness of the mind.
Perhaps you wouldn't understand.
Oh, yes, I do.
Better than you think.
I've had psychoanalysis myself.
I prefer to treat myself.
Quite simply, Mr Shoestring, I have been suffering from a bout of materialism.
- Does that shock you? - Tremendously.
You see, at the South Pole, I was forced by bad weather to take refuge in an Australian geologist's camp.
- Brave, cheerful fellows.
- I'm sure.
But fond of their creature comforts to which I myself became accustomed.
More than comforts.
Luxuries.
In complete and utter conflict with what Starshine stands for.
Well, that's the Aussies for you.
So, when I returned to England, I knew I badly needed a period of meditation before meeting everyone again.
Wes Erin should really set us jumping then, at eight, another kind of leg work.
A date with our Private Ear, Eddie Shoestring.
He tells us about one of his cases, the cases he conducts free for you, the listeners.
As Roger has told you, I've spent much time travelling and studying with Stephen.
We all have a lot to thank him for and soon we will be able to do so in person.
The movement is growing.
The contributions you are all making are helping to spread the word.
But we must persuade even more people in even more towns.
You've heard Roger say many times, all the world's great religions show us there is no virtue in material possessions.
In a world which becomes more and more materialistic, our message becomes even more true.
That's the whole strength we possess.
The path of simplicity, peace, and communion with the stars can lead to total happiness.
It is our job to spread this message.
And, by doing so, bring the world back from the edge of By having nothing, we can embrace everything.
This message is hidden and confused in most religions, like Christianity, Islam, even Buddhism.
Hey! Hey! Who are you? You have a "For sale" board, don't you? I was looking at the house.
With a tape recorder? I am a surveyor, I dictate my notes.
Viewing is strictly by appointment.
I made one with the estate agents.
I don't believe you.
You'd better leave before we make you an appointment with a ditch.
- She's got the machine running.
- I am at a house in the Cotswolds, talking to two peace-loving members of the Starshine.
You're a reporter.
Radio West, Felicity Lamb.
We're getting sick of your lot, especially Eddie Shoestring, who has been persecuting us.
Look, if you're having trouble with Shoestring, I can certainly pass that on.
Don't blame it on me.
He's just some idiot our station boss hired.
We have a code of ethics about this sort of thing.
I am doing a serious investigation on your group and I would like to talk to some of your people.
Listen, you'd better just get out of here now.
Not till I get some answers.
We'll give you some answers.
I really think that you Now, that's what I call missionary zeal.
My word, I bet you get a lot of converts that way.
Good afternoon.
Xena, isn't it? You know, you shouldn't go around knocking ladies' hats off.
As I said, you seem determined to persecute us.
Only seeking after the truth, like you.
And me.
- You've got a bloody nerve.
- I didn't mean all that about you.
I should've let them break your bloody arms off.
Who sent you out here? Rayburn? I've been following you all afternoon.
Sorry.
Let me buy you a pint.
All right.
What is it? - Nothing.
Let's forget the drink.
You're a very inconsistent man, Eddie.
Consistently, I'm going back to town.
- Is that the truth? - Absolutely.
Eddie, it's half past eleven.
All right, good night.
Oh! It's all right.
Come on, in.
I won't keep you a minute, honest.
You want some cocoa? - Cocoa? - I've got a headache.
I've had a lousy evening with a DS from the drug squad.
He bores for Interpol.
He probably slipped you a quick Mickey in your wine.
You've got to watch him, you know.
If he laced my gin with anything, it was Valium.
Anyway, to what do I owe you the pleasure? Land registry, I want you to find out who owns a certain house in the Cotswolds and the Charity Commissioners.
Where the registered office of Starshine is, if it has one? Er no chance.
Emphatically.
Immutably.
Well, microscopic.
How is the universal mind this evening? It's beginning to smell a bit particular.
I mean, peculiar.
Particular is better, actually.
I suppose, it is.
Peter, you are out of order, flinging in a reporter without telling Eddie.
What about news priorities? Priority and courtesy are not necessarily incompatible.
The question is are you and Felicity Lamb.
You're not trying to get me into bed with her, are you? - Only in a manner of speaking.
- What exactly have you in mind? Keep her on the story with you to protect her.
Protect her? She's so tough you could take her brass rubbing.
I think you're both forgetting something, this is a Private Ear case on behalf of that girl's mother.
I know.
I know that.
But now it looks like something more.
Good broadcasting.
You never know when I might be able to help you.
Well, well, well.
- What is it? The great man himself.
The man who made Starshine what it is today.
Stephen Steele? Yeah, I should have guessed.
It was such an ordinary, boring name.
And there's Mrs Holdwing, the estate agent.
And Maria, the so-called counsellor.
Are we gonna call in and say, "Hello.
"? No, we're gonna steal a car.
No, thanks, Shoetree, I've already got a car.
Ah, but this one's just for show.
You never give up, do you? - Frequently.
I heard you were here last night creating a disturbance.
Well, I've come to create another one, Maddy.
You and your friends are being ripped off.
No, you're letting life rip you off.
I'm fine.
I'm really looking forward to my birthday, so that I can give really all I have.
You'll see.
Oh, you're nice.
I wish you would join us.
She wants you in the dormitory.
Now, I want to speak to you people.
I can prove that you are being conned.
There's a car outside and you bought it.
So, why don't you come with me and see what else you bought.
Get lost.
Now.
Now, if this man attacks me, you'll know I'm telling the truth, won't you? Very clever.
I'm going to break your arms off, very peacefully.
So, why don't you come with me? Roger! The car outside belongs to your friendly record producer, Mr Jim Huckle.
He's one of the people who controls you.
Nobody controls us, only ourselves.
Don't be so stupid.
Your chief controller is Stephen Steele, a man who has done time for fraud.
How do you know that? He's on the police files for a similar racket 15 years ago in Norfolk.
Racket? Forming a cult, buying derelict houses at rock-bottom prices, and getting suckers like you lot to do them up.
This is blasphemy.
Forget the goody-two-shoes stuff, pal, you've been rumbled.
The money from the sale of the houses is laundered through the charity, but it all goes to Steele, Huckle and his girlfriend Maria.
Maria the counsellor? Yeah, her real name is Anne Meredith, she owns a race horse with your oracle, Steele.
Well, if you don't believe me, come to the house and stables where stainless Stephens lives.
Don't believe him, he's evil.
Look, what exactly is your slice in this, Roger? I have Photostats here showing that he has been collecting social security payments on your behalf through the charity.
Because every bit helps to keep your top management in luxury.
Especially Mr Stephen Steele, who's probably lolling by his swimming pool right now.
Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! Out! What the hell do you think you're doing? You are Stephen Steele, aren't you? I've seen your picture.
I've even prayed to it.
You started something really beautiful and you're nothing but a rotten crook.
Shoestring's told us.
Smash it all, smash everything.
Maddy! No, stop! Stop! Oh, my God! What a mess! Now, why smash everything, when you can own it all? But we don't own it, these cheats do.
Now, I'm sure Mr Steele, now you'll like to sell them everything, rather than have me call the police, wouldn't you? Hmm? Steve? I mean, you could even give them a receipt.
Surely, I mean, what about that clock? Eh, 5p? And this beautiful, beautiful three-piece silk suite.
18p for everything.
And this No, no, it's horrible.
These two paintings,18th century.
Pair of them, 12p.
The sound you hear now is the voice of Radio West's special investigator Eddie Shoestring, holding what must be one of the strangest auctions ever, here, in this elegant Cotswold mansion bought unwittingly with love, now seething with hatred and indignation.
This is Felicity Lamb bringing you the strange, strange story of the Starshine sect.
Really excellent radio, first class.
- Unique, a unique programme.
Well done.
- Thank you.
Shoestring, you don't mind if I take all the credit here, do you? She invariably does.
- Well, she's done very well.
- Thank you.
Will you excuse me? - I think so too.
Is this is the opportune moment to ask Hello, Eddie.
I didn't get a chance to thank you properly and so I've come to say thanks from us all.
Well, that's very kind.
What you're gonna do now? Oh, we're gonna carry on.
We had a meeting and most of us feel that we still believe in what Starshine stands for.
So, we're going to run our own affairs.
With your money? Not quite.
Well, yes and no.
We're going to put my trust money in a deposit account and only use the interest.
And we're going to work but live together simply, as we have been.
Well, that's great, if it's under your control.
Yes.
And I've got two things to give you and you're not allowed to say no.
- Here.
- What's this? It's £2.
50 for the record.
Oh, good! It was a lousy record.
Keep the money.
- And this.
- Thank you.
Goodbye, Eddie.
Goodbye, Maddy.
- Bye.
- Bye.
I can see why you wanted to follow this thing through.
Yeah, they're just my type.
- Young and innocent.
- Thanks.
Cufflinks.
Silver cufflinks.
They're nice.
Two little stars.
Thanks from the Starshiners.
Hello, what you got there? A present, silver cufflinks.
Great! I do all the work, he gets all the goodies.
I never wear cufflinks.
Probably suit you better, Felicity.
- You have them.
- Thanks, pal.
It's my pleasure.