Unnatural History s01e11 Episode Script

I found something! You guys check it out, it's well it's a something.
Wow, a perfectly preserved coprolite.
No way! How awesome is that! Very! Coprolites are perfect for studying early mankind's diet.
Really? What is it? Petrified poop, notice the seeds.
You know, I thought that we were going to be discovering ancient temples and ducking blow darts and waving torches at stuff.
I didn't think I'd be touching people's seeds.
There were no ancient temples in the Virginia colony of Roanoke, just 120, men, women and children who vanished in the greatest mysteries in American History.
What do you think happened to them? Every field scientist I know including your parents dream of solving this particular missing person's case but no one ever has.
Sort your finds and show them to our experts.
Hey Bartlett, shoot me a spritz, bro.
What? No, it's an organic custom pest repellant formulated for my body chemistry.
You can't it's not water.
Ever heard of Melanoma? No, why? Is she hot? Oh, Henry Griffin.
Your parents reputation precedes you so I'm already impressed.
Wait until you see this Professor Santana.
Wow, hmmmm Violet? Well, I would classify this particular specimen as a first rate punking.
Oh, ho ho.
Made in China.
Are you sure you're a Griffin? But you love stuff in China.
No problem Jasper, we're even.
Even? Even, how? That coprolite is a fossil the other one's Henry put down there were a bit fresher.
Its tough being in the shadow of an accomplished scientist, isn't it? What do you mean Gunnar? It's just that I can relate.
Your parents are archeologists? My dad is, was, who knows? Anyways, he prefers to be called a history detective.
What's the story with Gunnar's dad? Sven Erickson? Oh, he was famous, almost.
He walked out on his family when Gunnar was still in pull-ups.
He walked out to where? My dad said that Sven was kind of a perpetual drifter.
Hey speaking of perpetual drifteters, Henry's parents are coming to DC for parent's weekend.
Oh no way, you must be so excited.
I am, except for finding nothing on this dig to impress them.
And having to wear a tie to the parents welcome brunch.
Ow, why are these flying piranhas only eating me? My parents found a Neanderthal burial site Kurdistan, a Hong Dynasty temple in China, the Ashaninka tribe of Peru and what have I done? Besides spiking Jasper's insect spray with lactic acid? Lactic Acid? That's a mosquito magnet.
You want a punk war Griffin? You got a punk war! Griffin! Today, I'll prove I'm a Griffin.
Huh? Whoa! Help! Help! Heeeeelllllppp! Henry? Henry? Henry? Come on, where are you? Whoa, I think something moved.
Nope, it's a log.
This isn't funny, Henry! Henry! My feet are wet.
This part of the island is off limits.
Which is exactly why we're looking for Henry for here.
Seriously, he needs one of those GPS chips they put in cats.
Jasper.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Hold up.
Hold up? Henry's drowning.
No, no, no, that's what he wants us to think.
Okay Henry, how clueless do you think I am? There's no way somebody like you would step in quick sand, now come on.
Show yourself! I think he's trying.
What is that? A hammer? Henry, okay I get you out.
Argh, what's up guys? What's up? You're in quick sand! Okay, give me your other hand.
I can't its busy.
How can it be busy? Why are you so heavy? I found something else.
What is that? A mummy? I think we just found one of the lost colonists from Roanoke.
That's pretty crazy, eh dad? Mummified bodies are found in European bogs quite often, rare to find one here.
Now I suppose the quick sand might do the trick.
What trick? No oxygen, no bacteria, no sunlight an ideal chemical environment for natural preservation Christmas field study.
Titus Bull Burial Site.
Congratulations Henry.
Do you really think it could be a Roanoke colonist? Well we'll find out as soon as the museum completes its analysis.
Henry, you might have solved one of the oldest mysteries in American history.
Careers are made on much less.
Mr.
Griffin, I am impressed.
A find like this could put you in league with, well your parents.
JASPER! Hey bring back my clothes.
FIRE! Come on, let's see some real streaking! Fire Okay, okay! Are you okay? Well, only Henry Griffin would risk his life to save someone that's already dead.
Only Henry Griffin would do it wearing nothing but sandals and a smile.
Where's my hammer? Well, I was going to punk you but since my dad is on the war path I thought you may need something to defend yourself.
It is true you ran into that van? Well, I'm sorry uncle B, I couldn't let him burn.
I suppose in my day I might have pulled the same stunt.
What day was that April fools? Believe it or not, I earned my calluses the old fashioned way, by digging.
You mean digging through filing cabinets right? Has that been catalogued? Well, in all the excitement I kind of forgot about it.
It was in the sandpit.
Then it's important, make sure it gets to the division of Archeology but then if it gets there after you show it to your parents, well it's spent What's another few days.
Thanks uncle B.
Did I do my family name proud? Aside from going to a off limits area, almost drowning in quick sand and nearly burning to death? Sure, very proud.
Why didn't you just shower at the dig site? Because I know your tricks, I at least left you with a towel.
You wouldn't have left me with anything.
Actually, I had planned on a tube sock.
I really can't stand looking at myself naked so I think our classmates are out of the question.
Speaking of classmates, how well do you know Gunnar Erickson? Well, we used to hang out in grade school and after his father left my dad kind of became like a mentor to him even pushed him to go into archeology.
Do you think he set fire to the van? Why? Besides that van had a history of malfunctioning it was after all government property.
Except the fire didn't start inside the van.
It started underneath it.
And you know this how? Gunnar Erickson was using the same sort of stove at the dig.
Well, why would he want to murder a mummy? I never said he did but it wouldn't hurt to ask.
I wish I could help you but somebody stole my stove.
Are you sure it was mine that started the fire? Well that's the weird thing.
After the fire was out I went back to get the stove but it was gone.
Because that actually belonged to my dad, in fact I stole it from his exhibit.
Your dad has an exhibit? Sort of, I'll show you.
See this mannequin? All this gear was my dad's of course he never stayed in one place for this long.
Boss glasses though.
Yeah, he was a real rock star.
Well, as annoying as my dad can be I couldn't imagine not knowing him.
Or worse knowing he didn't want to know me.
Must have been a tough way to grow up.
Hey doesn't that kind of look like you're hammer? Most of these finds are credited to Sven Erickson.
Why would a Viking hammer be found near an English Colony of Roanoke Virginia? Cleary you don't know your hot button historical controversies.
Some historians believe that the Vikings explored America as far south as Florida but there's no evidence of them beyond Newfoundland.
Why is that so controversial? Because the Vikings predated Columbus by 500 years, if anyone could prove that they made it down the US coastline before Columbus arrived The entire United States history would have to be re-written.
Can you translate these markings? It's dated 1010 AD, they're Runes, the Viking alphabet.
My Futhark is a little rusty.
Roughly it means "When summer solstice starts the day, Odin's compass lights the way"? So then what, if Henry's discovery re-writes history does that mean that America would have to be re-named to the United States of Griffinica? Griffinica? Jasper, one hammer won't re-write anything.
Henry's right, it's intriguing but not even close to proof, a Vikings body however.
That could be a historical game changer.
So, how can you tell the difference between a really old dead Viking and a not quite as really old dead English settler? Condition of the skeletons, stomach contents, teeth.
Teeth are a window into the past, which is why you should floss daily.
You never know who's going to looking into your mouth Cool, it's gross but cool.
Okay, here we go.
It looks like a male, approximately age 40, wow.
What is it? See that grey line? That's a stab wound.
There's two more, here and here.
Are you saying he was murdered? I'm saying he was stabbed.
What's wrong [inaudible.]
? This man isn't a Viking and he's not a English Colonist either.
Well, how can you tell? He's wearing a wrist watch.
What's that? It's an ID card from the museum.
We just solved one mystery, its Gunnar's dad.
He was a good man; you're so very much like him.
In what way? Strong, brave, stoic.
Are you okay? I don't know what worse, hearing about how he died or I just thought I'd be able to see him again.
Sorry you didn't get the big find you were hoping for but now my family can stop wondering so thank you.
I'm sorry Gunnar.
It's alright, what kind of scientist would I be if I don't need to know the truth.
Well you still don't know the truth, no tall of it.
After 15 years, I'm pretty sure this is all the truth I'm going to get.
The worst day of his life and he's trying to make me feel better.
That sounds like Gunnar.
Roanoke field reports, incoming.
What do you expect to find in all this stuff? The truth, Jasper, about who stabbed Sven Erickson, wrapped him in burlap and tossed him into a sand pit.
Find anything? Yeah, actually, Sven Erickson was president of the A Viking expert digging around an old English Colony, he must have been on to something.
He didn't know that somebody was on to him.
Oh, oh, oh that's horrible.
What? Oh, ow, are my eyes bleeding? Are they bleeding? Uncle Bryan was quite a beast when he was younger.
Oh, what is that thing eating his face.
It's a mustache, he looks kind of hot.
For the sake of my sanity I'm going to assume you're talking about the sweat on his upper brow.
Our family has descended from a long line of explorers that includes your dad.
And you Jasper despite all the evidence to the contrary.
I'm late for M.
A.
D.
What is M.
A.
D.
? Other than spending every day and night down here? Martial Arts Dance, it's helping me get over my so called awkward phase.
Is that like capoeira? Hiiiya! Did I mention it's a beginner's class? Guys I'll get that later, promise.
Okay? Hmmm look at him, he's smiling.
If I don't know any better I'd say he kind of looks happy.
Look who he's standing next to.
Seeing Gunnar's dad next to yours makes him seem more real doesn't it.
Oh, you know what; I have to go tutor my math teacher.
You? Tutor your math teacher? Yeah, just in analytical numbers theory.
I'll just keep going; we've barely made a dent in these Roanoke files.
Okay, well just E, tweety text me if you find something.
Blood.
Jasper? 911, what's your emergency? Somebody's breaking in and I'm blind.
Sir what's your location? Sir? You're non-responsive, police are on route.
Now we're even! And you can't recall any distinctive markings like tattoos, scars, freckles? I told you I couldn't see; somehow he put a toxin in my eyes.
How does someone get anything in your eyes without you noticing? I don't know, yet but that knife might have something to do with the murder of Sven Erickson.
He had stab wounds, it could be a match.
Well it does look like blood.
I am going to get forensics to check it against the victims DNA.
Who knows, you may have heated up a very cold case.
Okay, peas or carrots.
Both.
So what kind of tree did you say it was again? The Malaysian Buddha Buddha also known as the Blinding Tree, I'm pretty sure it's sap is all over this mug.
Yeah, I think I'm the one who's the sap.
The very word Buddha Buddha sets off my bunko meter.
Ohhh! Is that better? Yeah, thanks Jasper.
If it is blinding sap it should separate.
Do you think that guy was after the hammer? I don't know but whatever it was, he didn't get it.
Do you want to know the most amazing thing about this? Mmm? You called the police, you actually engaged the proper authorities, you did everything right.
I will try anything once.
Oh, yeah? Does that include wearing a tie to the parents welcome brunch? Of course, I'll be so excited to see them, wait who am I kidding, no way! Hey, hey, hey, hey, it is separating, it's separating.
Told you.
Oh boy does it stink.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Keep it.
You never know when this stuff might come in handy.
Right, you never know when you'll need a blob of blinding ointment.
What happened to you? Morning Uncle B.
Someone laced Henry's tea with sap form the Buddha Buddha tree which in case you didn't know causes temporary blindness.
Please restrict the punking to yourselves.
Dad, I'm not punking you.
Hmmm Next semester you're taking a cooking class.
Someone's here to see you.
Mom & Dad! Oh, Henry what have you done now.
I have a warrant for your arrest.
My arrest? What? No! Me? For the murder of Sven Erickson.
It's only pasted on this Yohoo news website which seems pretty obscure so maybe people won't know about the arrest.
Henry, they're calling him the quicksand killer.
Great! You know, I finally do the right thing and then it ends up being the wrong thing but how was I supposed to know your dad's fingerprints were all over the murder weapon.
Okay, when he comes in please just try to be positive.
Okay? Don't mention anything about fingerprints or the knife or his history of conflict with the victim.
His history of conflict? Well it was just a fist fight or two, I read about it in the dig report.
.
It's really nice that you made bail.
Yes it is.
However it wasn't great for Jasper's college fund.
If I wasn't trying so hard to impress my parents none of this would have happened.
Yes that's true.
This is all my fault.
Yes, this is also true.
It's all very true.
But why were your fingerprints on the knife? Henry! I've been asking myself that question all morning as well.
Also how my knife got into the doom rooms.
So it was your knife? Lost it a long time ago or maybe it was stolen, I can't remember.
But why would you, I mean why would anybody want to murder Sven Erickson? Well, he claimed to have a map.
Well, it wasn't quite a map.
Part of the map he insisted wasn't actually a map but it was something he felt would prove the Vikings were the first to colonize the eastern seaboard.
And that something is worth killing for? To take credit for a discovery as impressive as that? For some people yes but there's no way to know unless the murder is solved not just pinned on me.
Dad, why are you packing? Notice of suspension from the board of trustees.
Oh, my suspension.
Thank you.
Pending trial, appearances must be maintained in the wake of this repugnant scandal.
This is not happening Indeed it is, it says so, paragraph one, two, four, paragraph 12 is where is says I'm required to ask for your keys.
See you two at home.
Dad.
How are you Henry? I mean, what's going to happen to him if he goes to prison? What's going to happen to our family? I guess more people heard the news then I thought.
Henry, I am really scared and I'm not talking about my usual everyday fear, I'm talking about fear that actually has a basis and reality.
We don't have time to be afraid, we have to solve this.
How can we possibly find a killer from 15 years ago? Because he's still around, probably someone we know.
How can you be so sure? Because whoever attacked me would need to have access to the doom rooms.
Like how he knew how to plant that knife to frame my dad.
And that the mummy was Viking or a colonist it was Sven Erickson, whoever murdered him on the 1995 dig had to be on our field trip too.
You've got some nerve coming to school today.
The dean had nothing to do with this.
We're going to prove what really happened.
Still trying to impress your parents, don't bother the police are way ahead of you.
Hey! I lost my dad, now it's your turn.
Gunnar you have every right to be upset but that's not fair.
Fair Griffin? Like you accusing me of torching the van? That was a mistake.
Well this isn't.
I'm not going to fight you.
Just stay away from me then.
Okay, know what? Find Maggie.
Jonah Santana, Ben Blyleven and Viola Franks.
So why them? This photo is from the disappeared and those three were the only ones that were on our dig too.
And Uncle Bryan.
Not that I suspect him or anything.
Could the person who attacked have been a woman? Maggie I was blind.
It's got to be one of these three.
Okay so what's the plan? We each pick an office, look for anything incriminating and re-group here but be careful whoever we're chasing is already after us.
Chapter one, page one, call me Ishmael.
It's Blyleven, I found a book on plant toxins that makes specific reference to the Buddha Buddha Blinding Tree, that is semi concrete evidence.
He's a botanist Jasper but angry letters from Erickson to Viola Franks establish clear motive.
Where have you been I was worried you'd been caught? Finding proof that Jonah Santana is the killer.
We all found proof.
But if we all found proof Then it could have been any of them.
If we can't find the killer, we might be able to find whatever it is he's looking for.
Which is what, your hammer? Yes, and whatever its connection is to Odin's compass.
Santana has a journal entry about the compass and two missing pieces of something called Iolite; he thinks that Sven had them both.
What's iolite? It's a blue crystal and the world's first polarizing filter.
The Vikings called it Odin's compass because iolite lens can tell you the exact position of the sun.
A blue crystal lenses? Iolite? Iolite, okay we have to get a better look at these.
It could take days, maybe weeks to get the clearance to study them.
Well, Maggie we can't wait that long, my dads arraignment is on Monday.
We don't have a choice.
All of these displays are armed with weight and pressure sensors.
We move anything and an alarm sounds.
Is there any way to bypass the system? I'm not allowed to say.
I signed a confidentiality agreement that says I can't say.
Well what can't you say? I just said I can't say! But this is an emergency because my Uncle may be going to prison for murder.
Emergency, there is a line item in the contract, page seven sub section B.
Force majeure.
Translation? As a museum dosen I do not have the access code to shut down the system.
That doesn't help us.
But what I do have, only to be used in an emergency is the reset code.
So you can shut it down? Yes and no.
The system is only off line for as long as it takes to reset itself.
Great, well how much time is that? One second.
What? And we have to replace those sun glasses with something of equivalent weight.
Of course.
Not to pressure you or anything but if you don't swap those specs in about a second my dad is not going to be the only one going to prison.
Jasper! What? Okay Henry, on three.
One, two, three! That's it we're reset.
Maggie, he didn't even move, he didn't even try.
Henry.
Oh, hi Jasper.
Were you in one of those alpha states or something? Did you not hear her? Whoa, these things are weird.
Okay I know I ask this a lot but how did you learn how to do that? Oh when your ten years old with a sweet tooth and no candy store a thousand miles you learn to work quickly.
What? What is it? We're not alone, footsteps coming from the east wing.
What do you think its security? No those aren't guard boots, my mistake, the north wing.
I don't hear anything.
Neither do I.
Or maybe it's the west wing Okay, what is wrong with your bat ears? Can't you tell where it's coming from? I don't know but something is coming and fast.
Something? What's that supposed to mean? It means now would be a good time to get down.
Oh, man of course he's still awake.
No doubt ready to pounce with a flurry of accusatory questions when all we're trying to do is save his bacon You know we should answer them for once, someone did just try to kill us.
I don't think he's pouncing tonight unless you mean at that tub of French Vanilla.
Hey dad, dad.
No don't wake him up, you're going to make it worse.
Hey dad, whatcha watching? Okay, it's time for bed.
Five more minutes.
Bedtime, come on upstairs.
I'm not tired.
But you will feel better after a full night of sleep and my parents will be here tomorrow to help out.
Ohhhh, they called, a volcanic eruption just grounded all flights out of Asia, they're not coming but there's a silver lining, they get to miss my indictment.
Ohhhh, actually they don't.
You see its being broadcast worldwide on Court TV.
Hey, I'm sorry about your parents.
We've got bigger problems to solve.
It's kind of hollow.
Oh, alright.
So why forge a hollow hammer? Because it's not just a hammer.
You just reconstructed Odin's compass.
Okay, well how does it work? When summer solstice lights the day, Odin's compass lights the way.
Yeah but the solstice the runes were talking about happened a thousand years ago.
So what do we do? Use a time machine.
Trust me.
So was Gunnar home? Home, but in no mood to talk to me much less come over here.
I tried to explain about his dad's compass but he was too busy yelling to listen.
How is this a time machine? Because thanks to computer modeling we can recreate the sky to any date we want.
Here is the summer solstice from this year.
See if the compass recognizes it.
Mesmerizing.
Mystical.
But no help, right here is the summer solstice from the year Gunnar's dad disappeared.
No, there's still nothing.
Alright, 1010, a thousand years ago.
Wow, it's a map of Roanoke Island.
Ah, okay, there's something else.
Look What's the Futhark say? Odin marks Valhalla's wall, when Thor's hammer strikes the shroud will fall.
The Shroud? What Shroud? The Shroud that conceals whatever Sven Erickson was looking for.
I've seen this mark before, on the rock face near the quick sand.
Text Gunnar and ask him to meet us and bring that Buddha Buddha juice, we may need protection where we're going.
Where are we going? Roanoke, there's a symbol exactly like this on the cliff side.
I think I know where the shroud is.
Exactly the same mark as on the [inaudible.]
map.
But what is it? There's no cave there's no cliff there's no anything.
Nobody said Sven Erickson was looking for a cave; we're looking for a shroud.
Whatever is here What? When Thor's hammer strikes the shroud will fall.
We have to hit it.
Hit it with the strength of four, according to Sven Erickson.
You should have given me that hammer the day you found it Griffin.
I knew it.
You killed him.
Maybe he did, maybe he didn't.
Then it was you.
And were you equally sure about me? Three of you, three stab wounds.
You each took a turn.
So no one could be sure who struck the fatal blow.
All that matter Jasper is that no one will ever be certain about who killed Sven Erickson.
Accept the jury that sends my dad to death row.
Better him then us.
Now, give it here.
And if I refuse? It's three against three, except I have the gun.
And I have a hammer.
Please, you may be smart but you are no fighter.
Ah, my eyes, my eyes.
Taste the Buddha Buddha, B-otanist.
Last chance Griffin.
You want it, go and get it.
The shroud has fallen.
Valhalla, home of the Gods.
The Vikings were here, the Vikings are here.
My dad was right; I guess it wasn't a crazy dream after all.
The world would be pretty boring without dreamers like him.
He'll finally get the credit he deserves.
But you found it.
If Jasper hadn't kept badgering me I wouldn't even be here right now.
You're dad figured it out first; he just didn't get a chance to finish what he had started.
So, you're going to have to do it for him.
What about getting out of the shadow of your parents? I know what my parents would want me to do.
Hey, is that a new suit.
My lawyer thought I should warm up my image for the jury.
Boy, are we lucky that never happened.
Where's Henry? We're going to be late.
Um, he's not coming.
Why not? Well you're welcome to go up and talk to him but he's in one of those Jim Bydrum stupors so he might not respond.
Is this about the tie? Dad, this is about Henry, I'm pretty sure his river runs deeper than that.
It's the parents welcome brunch, you should go with Jasper.
Seriously, I don't mind.
What if I mind? You know I thought I was doing my sister a favor by taking you in but obviously I had that completely backwards.
You've done me the favor and I'm not just talking about clearing up that annoying little murder charge.
Well I had nothing to do with it, you should thank Gunnar Erickson.
Right Henry, you did nothing.
Nothing you'll take credit for any way which is truly impressive.
Do I have to wear a tie? Absolutely, yes! Need any help? I'll be in the car.
JASPER! Looking good cuz.
Yeah, you too.
That's my favorite tie.
Uh huh.
Okay, now it's my favorite pocket square.
Not bad.
Hey did you hear the big news about Gunnar's discovery? Mount Erickson, what about it? Well it turns out it wasn't part of the Viking era at all.
It actually carbon dated back to the 16th century sometime around when the Roanoke Colonists disappeared.
Well that puts another twist on history but why would English colists create then hide a monument to the Viking Gods? It's a mystery; maybe youse dig site and figure it out for yourself.
Like any real Griffin would.
Or maybe you're just punking me again.
Me? I would never stoop so low.
Speaking of stooping, your shoes are untied.
Yeah, right that old chestnut.
No seriously, I'm not punking you.
And I'm not looking down.
Ow, oh my nose.