Wishbone (1995) s01e11 Episode Script

What's the story, Wishbone?
What's this your dreaming of?
Such big imagination
on such a little pub.
What's the story, Wishbone?
Do you think it's worth a look?
It kind of seems familiar
like a story from a book.
Shake a leg now, Wishbone.
Let's wag another tale, sniffing out
adventure with Wishbone on the trail.
Come on, Wishbone.
What's the story, Wishbone?
Watch the story, Wishbone?
What's the story, Wishbone?
What's the story? Wishbone?
What's the story?
Wishbone
I got it!
Here you go!
Thanks, Wishbone.
Hey, can I shoot now?
Joe?
Hey, how about a game of hoops?
Not now, we've got to
finish these math problems.
Hey, what'd you get on Problem 5?
Wow.
How? I got 24.7 on Problem 5.
This guy scored 2036
consecutive free throws.
Oh, I guess you didn't do Problem 5.
Hey, does this thing
have a section on food?
86, David.
Oh, what problem?
86 consecutive free
throws in five minutes.
That's all I'd need to hold the
record for any kid under 16.
Then I'd be in the
encyclopedia of world records.
Do you really think it's possible?
Sure.
Everybody in this book has
done something incredible,
and I want to be one of them.
I want to do something
nobody else can do.
Something impossible.
Yes! Try for the impossible, Joe.
Take the leap, and I'll jump with you.
We'll be just like Don
Quixote and Sancho Panza.
Don Quixote and Sancho Panza are
the main characters in the book,
Don Gujote, by Miguel Servantes.
Ooh, I like that.
It was written in two parts,
the first part in 1605
and the second part in 1615.
The story starts out in the
quiet countryside of Lervante's
La Mancha, Spain, where
Don Quixote lived.
When Don Quixote had nothing to do,
which was most of the
time, he took to reading.
He read everything he could
find about medieval knights
and their fantastic adventures.
His imagination was filled with tales
of famous challenges and tournaments.
Battles with giants and
other enchanted creatures.
Damsels in distress.
Good morning, senior. It's
time to eat breakfast.
Uncle, you have to eat something.
It's time to put down the book.
Yes.
Time has come to put down the book
and to take up the sword.
Uncle, what are you talking about?
From this day forward.
I shall be known as Don
Quixote de la Mancha.
I shall write every wrong.
Search out every possible danger.
But I shall emerge.
Victorious!
Why don't you have a
little breakfast first?
I shall be crowned with eternal
fame and honor for my noble deeds.
One day, a book shall be
written about my adventures,
the exploits of the great
knight of La Mancha.
But first things first, I need my armor.
But uncle, you know the stories
in these books are not true.
Trust me, there are no
knights in this day and age.
Chivalry is dead.
and that's for sure.
I was born to revive
the order of knighthood.
Leave me alone, please.
I must prepare to sally
forth into the world.
Uh-huh.
A certain sancho panza to
see you, signor, signor.
Splendium.
Part-time, full-time, salary, benefits?
I need someone to be my squire.
All right. I have one question.
What's a squire?
A squire is an assistant, a helper.
As a knight, I'm about to embark
on great and marvelous adventures.
I need someone like you to look after
things to help me with my armor.
Take care of the provisions and the food.
Uh, food.
Did you say I'll be
in charge of the food?
Yes.
Oh, I am gonna like this job.
Every night needs a lady to whom
he dedicates his brave deeds.
You and I will serve the
lady, Dulcinea El Taboso.
Uh, this, Dulcinea El Tabasco, whatever.
Does she live around here?
No, no.
She lives in a distant castle.
She is the inspiration
for everything I do.
Wow.
Are you interested?
Is it in the position?
What about raises, promotions,
any chance for advancement along the way?
You must know, friend Sancho,
that it is always the practice
for a knight to win a kingdom
and then to give it to
his squire to govern.
I promise if you stick with me,
you will get your own kingdom someday.
All right!
Sign me up for the kingdom plan!
I must warn you,
Some of these adventures
will be dangerous.
I shall have to fight
off giants and dragons.
You must not help me in these fights.
Only a knight is qualified to do
battle with the forces of evil.
Okay, let me see if I got this straight.
You handle the dragons,
and I handle the snacks.
That's my offer.
Deal! Let's hit the road!
All right, who wants to play
with the cute little dog?
How's the math going?
Uh-oh!
Homework patrol!
We're busted!
We're kind of taking a break.
Sort of.
Well, just for this afternoon, I want
you to stop thinking about world records
and concentrate on getting ready
for your math test tomorrow.
My record's not so good in math.
Well, just do your best.
Study.
And then you can work on the
world record in free throws.
Hey, you know what?
If you did set the record, I bet you
would drive DeMont and Jones crazy.
Is DeMont giving you a hard time, Joe?
You know, DeMont.
He's always on my case.
Anything I do, he has to do better.
But at least you know you're
not in competition with him,
even if he doesn't know it.
Okay, you guys, back to the math.
I want to see proof of
studying in one hour.
Oh, and don't forget, Wanda
wants to interview you.
She's doing an article for The Chronicle
about your record-setting event.
She's very excited.
Defense!
Defense!
I smell danger.
Okay, Joe, I know you're
in training, so I'll
just ask you a couple of quick questions.
Why don't you talk to me? After all, I'm
the one who made him what he is today.
Joe, what's it like to be
making your dream of getting
into the encyclopedia of
world records come true?
It's pretty good, I guess.
I'm a little nervous.
Oh, don't be nervous.
This is big, Joe.
Very big.
You're gonna be famous.
You're gonna go down in history.
I think I better practice, Miss Gilmore.
Of course.
I'll just watch.
Go ahead.
It's okay, Joe.
Just gotta relax.
You can't psych yourself out.
You gotta see yourself
doing it right every time.
Yeah, you've gotta visualize it.
Okay, buddy, stay loose.
Stay cool.
eye on the prize.
Are you ready?
Yeah.
And visualize.
Like Don Quixote.
He could see things
that no one else could.
So, are we there yet?
Fortune has smiled upon us.
Look yonder!
Oh?
An army of outrageous giants.
I will fight and overcome them all
for the honor of my
lady Dulcane El Taboso.
It will be my first great victory.
Um, maybe I'm missing something
here, but what giants?
Right in front of us.
Those creatures waving
their enormous arm.
Uh, I don't see giants.
I see windmills.
I tell you, they are giant.
Giants.
Stand back while I engage
in dreadful combat.
Don Quixote?
Stand, cowards.
Fly not from this single night.
Uh-oh.
Ouch!
That's a couple of
cracked ribs, at least!
Don Quixote!
Are you all right?
I told you it was a windmill!
You can't fight with a windmill!
You don't fight with a windmill!
You don't understand, Sancho.
Some cursed enchanter
changed the giant into a windmill
in order to rob me of
my glorious victory.
Well, you win some, you lose some.
You lose some.
But as long as there's
life, there's hope.
Yeah, no guts, no glory!
I must get up and go looking
for the next adventure.
But there's one problem.
What's that?
I don't think I can get up.
You don't need to. Just walk this way.
Yeah.
I
Ha ha ha ha.
My helmet, destroyed in battle.
I vow to replace this shattered
helmet with a better one.
A good helmet is hard to find.
They just don't make
them like they used to.
Mark my word, Sancho.
I am the knight who recapture
the golden helmet of Mambino.
Time for a picnic.
Look, Sancho, coming toward us.
Oh, I hope it's dinner.
Tell me what you see.
Okay, don't tell me.
It's a guy with a bow on his head.
No, it's the golden helmet of Mambino.
Oh, yeah.
Stand back, Sancho.
Oh boy.
Here we are.
go again.
Go no further, vile, rich.
Surrender Mambino's helmet
to a true knight of valor.
I'm just a barber on my
way to the nearest village.
Surrender the helmet.
What helmet?
Okay, time out.
Don Quixote.
Let me see if I can work a deal here.
Ah, look.
He wants that thing on your head.
What this?
This is just a bowl.
This my barber's bow.
basin. It's old. It's, it's
cracked. It's, it's junk.
He can have it.
Thanks. It means a lot to him.
Place their helmet on
the ground between us.
And I shall spare you from combat.
It's
It's yours.
You may go in peace.
Bye.
It was nice meeting you.
You know, I could see pasta
in this bowl, or a salad.
Ooh, better, better, fruit!
I shall strive to be worthy
of this golden helmet.
Well, there you go.
One man's bowl is another man's helmet?
There you.
Oh, stop time.
Yes.
Awesome.
Incredible. A world record in the making.
I taught him everything he knows.
And we're getting there.
We're getting there.
Yeah.
Hey, Joe.
Nothing but Nett.
What are you doing here, DeMont?
Well, I figured if you
really wanted to practice,
you'd need me here.
What makes you think I'd need you?
Joe.
Don't you want to see how you do
with someone like me in your face?
This doesn't have anything
to do with you, DeMont.
Oh, really?
Well, I just heard that Joe's
not going to be the only one
going for a record tomorrow.
What are you talking about, DeMont?
I'm talking about setting a world record
for consecutive free
throws in five minutes.
And I'm going to be the one to do it.
See you tomorrow, Joe.
Uh-oh.
The news is fast breaking.
A new challenger has
appeared on the scene.
Joe, do you have any comment
about this recent turn of events?
How do you feel about your
new rival on the court?
I can't believe it.
He just had to get in on this.
He just had to make it harder.
Don't worry about him, Joe.
Come on, you can do it.
We'll all be there for you.
That's right, buddy.
We're your biggest fans.
Me especially.
Don Quixote and Sanjo Panza
became famous throughout Spain.
Everywhere they stopped along the road.
people had heard of them, but everybody
loved to hear of their strange adventures.
First, we came across
an outrageous giant.
It was a windmill.
It was a giant.
Windmill.
Giant.
Okay. It was a giant that
looked like a windmill.
Who's telling this story? You or me?
Sorry. Sorry. Go ahead.
It was a windmill.
Oh, never mind. You talk. I'll eat.
I am honored to be in your
gracious presence, my lady.
He may not be the best-looking knight,
but he's certainly the most noble.
I'm his squire, you know.
Meanwhile, Don Quixote's niece and
housekeeper wanted him to come home.
They called it an expert to help them.
Senor Carasco, I think
he's lost his wits.
He truly believes that he's living
out the life of a knight-errant.
But really, he's just
making a fool of himself.
So, how can I help you?
You've been to the university.
You're smart and clever.
You can think of a plan to bring him back
home.
You say he won't listen to reason?
No.
But he does believe in these books.
He does try to follow
all the codes of honors
if he really were a knight
out of one of these stories?
Oh, yes, absolutely.
Then I think I have an idea.
I shall have to play a trick on him.
What do you mean?
Don't worry.
I will find.
You'll find your uncle,
and I will bring him home.
I will beat him at his own game.
Oh, look who's here.
I made the best man win.
Let's shoot some free throws.
Afternoon, Miss Talbot.
Joe, DeMont, you ready to give it a try?
I am, Coach Menendez.
Mr. Kim here agreed to
be the other witness.
Who wants to go first?
I'll go first.
If you don't mind.
Go ahead.
All this excitement is making
this little side kick hungry.
Mmm, mm-hmm.
You don't, Quixote de la Mancha.
I am he.
Do you serve the lady Dulcinea El Toboso?
I do.
With all my heart, Dulcinea El Toboso,
is the fairest, purest
lady in all the land.
I tell you, she is not.
I tell you she is. She is not.
She is.
Oh, no. Don't get him started.
You must prepare to defend the honor
and reputation of the lady you serve.
I will gladly fight for it.
Whoever loses this challenge must submit
himself to the demands of the victor.
If I win, Don Quixote, you
must do whatever I say.
But I shall not lose.
Sancho,
prepare to watch my glorious victory
in the name of Dulcinea El Taboso.
Uh, Don Quixote.
One word for you.
Windmill!
Let's all! One for the home team!
victorious. You must swear that the
Lady Dulcinea El Taboso is the fairest,
purest lady in the land.
I swear it.
I am satisfied.
I will spare your life.
You may go now.
Come, Sancho.
We must continue our journey.
This calls for a celebration.
Let's stop at the next inn for dessert.
I will not be beaten by a madman.
I will challenge you again, Don Quixote.
And this time, it's personal.
It's personal.
Time.
How'd I do?
80. Excellent.
But not enough to beat the record of 85.
All right. Your turn now.
Come on, Joe.
You can do it.
Come on, Joe.
You can do it!
Come on, Don Quixote.
You can do it.
Come on, Don Quixote.
You can
Haven't we done this already?
Prepare to meet your doom, Don Quixote.
Okay, you guys know the rules.
Shake hands and come out jousting!
Boy, this is hard on the nerves.
I can't look!
Don Quixote, buddy, pow, pow!
I'm coming!
I'm coming.
Back off you, big,
You are vanquist.
Alta Boso is not the
best lady in the land.
If you do not swear it,
I will take your life.
Then take my life.
For I will not dishonor
the name of Dulcinea.
I choose an honorable
death over a cowardly life.
I will spare your life on this condition.
You do not have to
dishonor your lady's name.
Instead, you must return home at once.
You must lay down your
arms, take off your armor,
and retire from knighthood.
I will do, as you say,
as long as you agree that the reputation
of my beloved Dulcinea
remains unharmed.
It is agreed.
I am satisfied.
Go home, Don Quixote,
and live a quiet life.
Time.
Well, you certainly beat
the record for today.
You got 81.
But I'm afraid you'd
have to have at least 86
to beat the world record as it stands.
I'm sorry, son.
I'm sorry, son.
You were very close.
You were great.
But I didn't do the impossible.
I'm not going down in
history or anything.
I'm not extraordinary.
Hey, you don't have to perform
impossible feats to be extraordinary.
Just live your life.
Life is an ongoing adventure.
And when something doesn't
go exactly the way you hoped,
you just have to be brave enough
to go on to the next thing.
Sorry, Miss Gilmore.
You don't have much of a story to write.
I certainly do.
You've followed through on your dream.
You didn't buckle under the pressure.
The agony of defeat and the thrill
of victory in the same moment.
It's a great story.
Well, Sancho.
This is the end of the road.
Really?
You mean, this is it?
I have given my word.
Well, we've had our ups and
downs, but it's been great.
Perhaps when we return home, we
could try another profession.
Something as fun as
being knight and squire?
We could start a new kind of life.
We could become shepherds.
Shepherds.
Yes, I've done some reading about it.
According to the books I've read,
Shepherds live in the
fields, free as birds.
I could get it.
We're going to be shepherds.
We must have the right kind of names.
I'll call myself Kehotis.
And you can be Ancino.
I don't know.
Thank you.