Ranma 12 s01e116 Episode Script
Episode 116
Gimme my bean-jam bun! I wanna sandwich! Where's my curry bun?! Coming! Just a minute! Hurry it up, will ya?! Shoot.
Everyday, th' same thing.
Secondary School Store "Student Store No.
2"? There's a No.
1 ? Is this place for real? What?! What? What? What? Bad! I have one bad feeling! What th' heck was that? "Keep Out"? Outta where? STUDENT STORE NO.
2 Found it! Pfft.
Place is deserted.
Shoot.
Looking for something? I, uh, just want somethin' to eat It's right there! What th'- -? This might've been a bunonce.
Dude's givin' me th' creeps, big-time G-Gotta go! Cut.
Ranma Saotome, sticking hees nose whea he not wanted! Hey, didja hear? Somebody's found Student Store No.
2! Y' mean one of the Seven Wonders of Furinkan High? I'd heard about it, but who'd 've thought it was real? Let's go check it out! What's goin' on, everybody? I'm really gettin' ticked off! I bought a yakisoba bun at Student Store No.
2.
It's all moldy! I asked for gym shorts, but I got these bloomers! Museum-quality retro! I asked for socks and sneakers and got old-style tabi! We got ripped off! Why are you telling us?! Go back and demand satisfaction! I wouldn't do that.
Nabiki! Why?! Why can't we go there? That's called the Hands-Off Store.
Everybody's stayed away from it.
Living there's an old man called the Master of Furinkan.
They say whoever goes near it gets cursed.
It's crazy to demand your money back.
For your own good, forget it.
But we can't let him do this to us.
Right, right.
That's absolutely right! Comrades! Set your minds at ease.
Tatewaki Kuno, guardian deity of Furinkan High, is here.
You need fear no curse.
I shall punish him! Th-The curse! We'd better forget about our money.
No-o! I can't go to P.
E.
class in bloomers! Who's afraid of some curse?! Nabiki, I'm going! Come back, Akane! Akane! Akane! You okay--?! Ranma?! What the heck are y' doin' He says he has no family and plus, he's in poor health.
Are you all right, mister? Thank you.
"Akane," you said? Still! How come you spread lies that this place was cursed? It's the principal's fault! He wants to ruin this store.
Right.
I'm only a helpless, old man.
Why would he do this to me? Gee, I dunnosomeone who got stuck with a rotten bun? Mister? Ranma! Stop talking like that! Just look at him! Wretch! You shall pay for your misdeeds! See the spirit of a son of Furinkan High! What're you doing, Kuno?! Weakling.
You're no real son of Furinkan High.
What?! It's only natural.
Look at what's happened to the proud sons of our school.
They sing rock 'n ' roll.
They date girls.
Some boys are even turning into girls.
How low the sons of Furinkan have fallen! The world's at an end! Boys are turning into girls? Is he talkin' about me? You're just the ghoul proprietor of a student store! That's just a cover I've assumed.
The first principal of Furinkan High School gave me the important duty of being School Mentor! I am Toramasa Kobayakawa!! And now is the time to fulfill my duty!! Consigliere Down! Down! Bow down! S-Sir--! I was unaware of that, sir! Forgive this one's rudeness.
I thought he was s'pposed t' be in poor health.
Who cares! At least he has more energy now.
Here! You two bow down! Forget it! Fool! I'm a walking encyclopedia of the school.
I know everything! You--! I'll get you for this! Interesting! Come at me, then! He ran away! Nincompoop! Come back here! Ranma--! Blast him.
Where'd he go?! Nyah, can't catch me! I'm not so senile yet.
I'll get 'im if it kills me! You wretch, Ranma Saotome! I won't allow you to defy our School Mentor! I, Tatewaki Kuno, will punish your transgression! This is punishment? You moronic dolt.
You're pretty good, Ranma Saotome.
Rats! Where'd he go? But you've still got a long way to go.
You're just a scrawny, newly hatched chick! Sorry I'm a chick.
How'd you do that? Formidable is the Anything Goes Martial Arts School! I'm humbled before you! He's gone again! What th' heck is that guy, anyway? He talks like some samurai warrior! You got that right.
You a mole or somethin' ! Now shall I relate the glorious deeds of Furinkan that carved the school's name into history! Several hundred years ago, the land was in chaos.
It was the Sengoku Jidai, the Age of Warring Daimyo! And? And, it was none other than our own Furinkan High that delivered the world from that chaos! True to our name, we were as swift as the wind! Like a forest, we block the enemy! Like a fortress, we protect our territory! Beneath the Furinkan banner we cut the enemy down as they charged! No foe could defeat the sons of Furinkan! Seeking to unify the land, we marched onward to the capital! If only I, Tatewaki Kuno, had been alive back then! I, too, might have won such glory in battle! Alas! So how'd it end? We were only a step away from the capital! How futile is history.
We were too late.
World War ll was at our doorstep! What kind of mixed-up history is that?! It helped kill time, tho'.
Silence!! Gone! Gone! Gone! Dat dirty ol' buggah! Where he hide dem?! Now whaddya doin' Hi! I not da principal I the hardworking janitor! What's he doin' here? Dammit! Dat dirty ol' buggah! I goan get him! I call you keiki on dis beautiful day fo' to say I goan break down dat dirty Student Store Numbah 2! It's awful, Grandfather Tora! The Principal's coming to attack with school athletes! I welcome it! I'll thrash them! Don't run! Where's that proud son of Furinkan?! Sometimes the wiser course is to withdraw.
The enemy once took us by surprise.
So we fled from Edo to the Chinese continent.
Furinkan High School changed its name to " Mongol Empire" and terrorized all of Europe! Now QUIT IT! But it's the end.
Preferring not to die by the enemy's hand, I, Toramasa shall slit my belly and die with honor! Grandfather Tora! Do not stop me.
Honor this samurai's request! Who's stoppin' you? Admirable resolve! I, Tatewaki Kuno, shall be your second! Pardon! What're you doing?! I'm just an old man! But--! Ranma, Grandfather Tora can't fight the Principal alone! Let's help him.
You gotta be kiddin'! Why should we help him?! No, not that! Awright, already! I'll do it! Happy?! Hokay! Geev them da good fight! Win, and you excused from taking da final exam!! Halt! I am captain of the Sons of Furinkan High, Squad No.
1 Tatewaki Kuno! You fools have sold your souls to the Evil Principal! I shall punish you! Wha--?! Here! Stop, you fools! Stop!! No finals, no finals! The chagrin! Take this! What is it?! Oil! And marbles! Have a shower of firecracker balls! Quit crowdin' me! I can't help it! That'll teach them! Dammit! Now I gotta use my last resort, da secret weapon! Old Man! They're stopped for now, but not for much longer.
He really is Furinkan's son! He's not moving a muscle! Nope, he sure ain't .
Old man! How come you're relaxin' when we're workin' our tails off?! What's with that dummy?! They say, "To fool the enemy, start with your allies.
" That was my kagemusha.
Right.
To help you goof off.
What's that?! A beckoning cat-statue?! Hey, boy, girlie, and dirty ol' buggah.
Dis one present from me.
Who wants your dirty present?! But I insist you take them.
Oh, no! Troublemaker! Take dis! Wha--?! Old Man! Ranma! Akane! Geev up, Ranma Saotome! Or you want dis girl's nice hair all cut off? She goan look good wit' da bowl cut, oh yes! Ranma! Dirty--! Let her go! What?! It's me you want, right? Fight me fair and square! Okay, den.
We fight! How come the Principal hates the old man so much? Hut.
Snip, snip, snip.
Do you think the old man will be all right? That confident fightin' spirit is th' real thing.
Fight, da kine! Look out, Grandfather Tora! The Evil Principal is defeated! Oh, no! So dat's wheah it wuz! Correct! Accept your fate! What the heck--? Huh! It's just an old school report card! " Kuno"? It's the Principal's ?! What?! I get it! You were a student at Furinkan High! An' you got an " F" in English! Oh, no! Nevah geev up! No more evidence now.
You idiot! That was just a copy! I've got plenty more! Here! The original's right here.
"Oh, my god!" Cut the act! Jerk! Actin' all American when you really failed English--! Very, very sorry! I lose! Student Store Numbah 2 can stay open! Now I can run my business in peace! Wonderful, just wonderful.
Stand back! The School Mentor of Furinkan High will now open the first franchise for business! He's still gonna sell us rotten buns! Don't be so spoiled! Weaklings! When we went to Siberia to destroy man-eating mammoths we ran out of provisions and had to eat grass--! Grandfather Tora hasn't changed one bit! You got that right.
Just another of Furinkan High's many wonders.
Everyday, th' same thing.
Secondary School Store "Student Store No.
2"? There's a No.
1 ? Is this place for real? What?! What? What? What? Bad! I have one bad feeling! What th' heck was that? "Keep Out"? Outta where? STUDENT STORE NO.
2 Found it! Pfft.
Place is deserted.
Shoot.
Looking for something? I, uh, just want somethin' to eat It's right there! What th'- -? This might've been a bunonce.
Dude's givin' me th' creeps, big-time G-Gotta go! Cut.
Ranma Saotome, sticking hees nose whea he not wanted! Hey, didja hear? Somebody's found Student Store No.
2! Y' mean one of the Seven Wonders of Furinkan High? I'd heard about it, but who'd 've thought it was real? Let's go check it out! What's goin' on, everybody? I'm really gettin' ticked off! I bought a yakisoba bun at Student Store No.
2.
It's all moldy! I asked for gym shorts, but I got these bloomers! Museum-quality retro! I asked for socks and sneakers and got old-style tabi! We got ripped off! Why are you telling us?! Go back and demand satisfaction! I wouldn't do that.
Nabiki! Why?! Why can't we go there? That's called the Hands-Off Store.
Everybody's stayed away from it.
Living there's an old man called the Master of Furinkan.
They say whoever goes near it gets cursed.
It's crazy to demand your money back.
For your own good, forget it.
But we can't let him do this to us.
Right, right.
That's absolutely right! Comrades! Set your minds at ease.
Tatewaki Kuno, guardian deity of Furinkan High, is here.
You need fear no curse.
I shall punish him! Th-The curse! We'd better forget about our money.
No-o! I can't go to P.
E.
class in bloomers! Who's afraid of some curse?! Nabiki, I'm going! Come back, Akane! Akane! Akane! You okay--?! Ranma?! What the heck are y' doin' He says he has no family and plus, he's in poor health.
Are you all right, mister? Thank you.
"Akane," you said? Still! How come you spread lies that this place was cursed? It's the principal's fault! He wants to ruin this store.
Right.
I'm only a helpless, old man.
Why would he do this to me? Gee, I dunnosomeone who got stuck with a rotten bun? Mister? Ranma! Stop talking like that! Just look at him! Wretch! You shall pay for your misdeeds! See the spirit of a son of Furinkan High! What're you doing, Kuno?! Weakling.
You're no real son of Furinkan High.
What?! It's only natural.
Look at what's happened to the proud sons of our school.
They sing rock 'n ' roll.
They date girls.
Some boys are even turning into girls.
How low the sons of Furinkan have fallen! The world's at an end! Boys are turning into girls? Is he talkin' about me? You're just the ghoul proprietor of a student store! That's just a cover I've assumed.
The first principal of Furinkan High School gave me the important duty of being School Mentor! I am Toramasa Kobayakawa!! And now is the time to fulfill my duty!! Consigliere Down! Down! Bow down! S-Sir--! I was unaware of that, sir! Forgive this one's rudeness.
I thought he was s'pposed t' be in poor health.
Who cares! At least he has more energy now.
Here! You two bow down! Forget it! Fool! I'm a walking encyclopedia of the school.
I know everything! You--! I'll get you for this! Interesting! Come at me, then! He ran away! Nincompoop! Come back here! Ranma--! Blast him.
Where'd he go?! Nyah, can't catch me! I'm not so senile yet.
I'll get 'im if it kills me! You wretch, Ranma Saotome! I won't allow you to defy our School Mentor! I, Tatewaki Kuno, will punish your transgression! This is punishment? You moronic dolt.
You're pretty good, Ranma Saotome.
Rats! Where'd he go? But you've still got a long way to go.
You're just a scrawny, newly hatched chick! Sorry I'm a chick.
How'd you do that? Formidable is the Anything Goes Martial Arts School! I'm humbled before you! He's gone again! What th' heck is that guy, anyway? He talks like some samurai warrior! You got that right.
You a mole or somethin' ! Now shall I relate the glorious deeds of Furinkan that carved the school's name into history! Several hundred years ago, the land was in chaos.
It was the Sengoku Jidai, the Age of Warring Daimyo! And? And, it was none other than our own Furinkan High that delivered the world from that chaos! True to our name, we were as swift as the wind! Like a forest, we block the enemy! Like a fortress, we protect our territory! Beneath the Furinkan banner we cut the enemy down as they charged! No foe could defeat the sons of Furinkan! Seeking to unify the land, we marched onward to the capital! If only I, Tatewaki Kuno, had been alive back then! I, too, might have won such glory in battle! Alas! So how'd it end? We were only a step away from the capital! How futile is history.
We were too late.
World War ll was at our doorstep! What kind of mixed-up history is that?! It helped kill time, tho'.
Silence!! Gone! Gone! Gone! Dat dirty ol' buggah! Where he hide dem?! Now whaddya doin' Hi! I not da principal I the hardworking janitor! What's he doin' here? Dammit! Dat dirty ol' buggah! I goan get him! I call you keiki on dis beautiful day fo' to say I goan break down dat dirty Student Store Numbah 2! It's awful, Grandfather Tora! The Principal's coming to attack with school athletes! I welcome it! I'll thrash them! Don't run! Where's that proud son of Furinkan?! Sometimes the wiser course is to withdraw.
The enemy once took us by surprise.
So we fled from Edo to the Chinese continent.
Furinkan High School changed its name to " Mongol Empire" and terrorized all of Europe! Now QUIT IT! But it's the end.
Preferring not to die by the enemy's hand, I, Toramasa shall slit my belly and die with honor! Grandfather Tora! Do not stop me.
Honor this samurai's request! Who's stoppin' you? Admirable resolve! I, Tatewaki Kuno, shall be your second! Pardon! What're you doing?! I'm just an old man! But--! Ranma, Grandfather Tora can't fight the Principal alone! Let's help him.
You gotta be kiddin'! Why should we help him?! No, not that! Awright, already! I'll do it! Happy?! Hokay! Geev them da good fight! Win, and you excused from taking da final exam!! Halt! I am captain of the Sons of Furinkan High, Squad No.
1 Tatewaki Kuno! You fools have sold your souls to the Evil Principal! I shall punish you! Wha--?! Here! Stop, you fools! Stop!! No finals, no finals! The chagrin! Take this! What is it?! Oil! And marbles! Have a shower of firecracker balls! Quit crowdin' me! I can't help it! That'll teach them! Dammit! Now I gotta use my last resort, da secret weapon! Old Man! They're stopped for now, but not for much longer.
He really is Furinkan's son! He's not moving a muscle! Nope, he sure ain't .
Old man! How come you're relaxin' when we're workin' our tails off?! What's with that dummy?! They say, "To fool the enemy, start with your allies.
" That was my kagemusha.
Right.
To help you goof off.
What's that?! A beckoning cat-statue?! Hey, boy, girlie, and dirty ol' buggah.
Dis one present from me.
Who wants your dirty present?! But I insist you take them.
Oh, no! Troublemaker! Take dis! Wha--?! Old Man! Ranma! Akane! Geev up, Ranma Saotome! Or you want dis girl's nice hair all cut off? She goan look good wit' da bowl cut, oh yes! Ranma! Dirty--! Let her go! What?! It's me you want, right? Fight me fair and square! Okay, den.
We fight! How come the Principal hates the old man so much? Hut.
Snip, snip, snip.
Do you think the old man will be all right? That confident fightin' spirit is th' real thing.
Fight, da kine! Look out, Grandfather Tora! The Evil Principal is defeated! Oh, no! So dat's wheah it wuz! Correct! Accept your fate! What the heck--? Huh! It's just an old school report card! " Kuno"? It's the Principal's ?! What?! I get it! You were a student at Furinkan High! An' you got an " F" in English! Oh, no! Nevah geev up! No more evidence now.
You idiot! That was just a copy! I've got plenty more! Here! The original's right here.
"Oh, my god!" Cut the act! Jerk! Actin' all American when you really failed English--! Very, very sorry! I lose! Student Store Numbah 2 can stay open! Now I can run my business in peace! Wonderful, just wonderful.
Stand back! The School Mentor of Furinkan High will now open the first franchise for business! He's still gonna sell us rotten buns! Don't be so spoiled! Weaklings! When we went to Siberia to destroy man-eating mammoths we ran out of provisions and had to eat grass--! Grandfather Tora hasn't changed one bit! You got that right.
Just another of Furinkan High's many wonders.