Amphibia (2019) s01e12 Episode Script

1
Theater night.
The one night a month we come together,
watch our stories,
and forget all our horrible,
horrible troubles.
Now who wants popcorn?
- Oh, me, me!
- I do!
My seat!
Theater night, theater night!
Oh! Right in the middle!
- Dibs!
- That seat is mine!
Not if I get there first.
Boom!
No fair. You have appendages.
Tut-tut. Sprig, give Polly the seat.
Say what? Come on, Hop Pop.
I got here first.
That's what older brothers do, Sprig.
They look out for their little sisters.
Now, move that rump over to that stump.
Bummer, dude.
It's just not fair.
Just because she's a little younger,
she always gets special treatment.
I'm an only child, so I don't relate.
All my parents' attention was focused
on me.
And it was, awesome.
Lucky you.
Alright now everybody settle down.
I have some bad news.
The acting troupe had
to cancel on account of
well, being eaten on the way here.
We need our story.
Hold up, everyone.
I have something that might work.
It's called a "movie."
It's like a play, but totally better.
A movie.
- Thanks, Tad, local glass artisan.
- Yep.
OK, so tonight I'm going to be showing
the timeless classic Love Choice,
which has always been one
of my favorites because
Just start the movie!
You got it.
Dang it.
In the not so distant future,
three grounded yet supernatural teens
must navigate their feelings
if they hope to survive.
Wait, how could they be both
grounded and supernatural?
Oh, Hunter. I know that together we'll
make it through this nightmare.
Constance, my cybernetic abs
belong to you and you alone.
Hmm, Polly likey.
I know I said I liked Hunter
but I can't help but be drawn
to you as well, Alastair.
May I sing you the traditional
song of my people?
I like this Alastair.
He's ethereal, yet approachable.
It is now time for me
to make my love choice.
I choose I choose
Constance!
We must go after her!
I'll save you, Constance!
To be continued.
What?
- That was the end?
- Who did she pick?
I'm so frustrated right now!
Believe me, guys. Been there.
They are making a sequel,
Love Choice 2, but it's not out yet.
I'll tell you who she picks!
Hunter! He's a beefcake.
What? She should pick Alastair.
He's a thinker. A dreamer.
Listen up!
I don't even want to live in a town
with someone who likes Alastair.
Well, I don't want to live
in a town with someone who likes Hunter.
That does it!
Everybody who chooses Hunter,
get behind me.
- Yeah!
- He looks strong.
He's so attractive.
Well, anyone who likes Alastair
can get behind me.
- Alastair's my man!
- Definitely Alastair.
- Excuse me, pardon me.
- Hey!
Sprig, just let Polly win this one,
before things get even worse.
Sorry, Hop Pop. But I've had
it with this pollywog
and her special treatment.
We ain't backing down!
This means war!
I have a bad feeling about this.
Eh, I'm sure by morning
clearer heads will prevail.
Or, you know, not.
I don't believe this.
The town is split right down the middle.
Hail Alastair!
Hail Hunter!
This is just like an internet
message board.
But IRL.
Were things on this "Internet" resolved
in peaceful and civilized ways?
See for yourself, dude.
Oh, gosh.
I forgot my house is over in Alastairtown.
Take that, you stinking Hunterite.
If we don't do something fast
this whole town is going
to tear itself apart.
Polly and Sprig are the ringleaders.
If we can just get them
to get along, we'll be fine.
- Amazing, Leader Sprig.
- You have the voice of an angel.
Deer Sprig, you have a visitor.
Should we throw her in the deer prison?
No, no. It's okay. Thank you,
deer Stumpy and deer Croaker.
Take five, deer friends.
And great to see ya.
Are you here to join our deer choir?
Nope. I'm here to tell you
this dumb feud with Polly is dumb.
And you need to end it.
Just let her have this one, dude.
You're an only child, Anne.
You don't understand.
I'm always giving up things for Polly.
Well, no more! The only way to end this
is if Polly submits to me!
- But
- We're done here.
Got you.
Oh, come on. This isn't cool, Sprig.
This isn't cool!
That's Deer Sprig to you.
And stay out of Alastairville.
Anne! Polly's not budging. She won't even
see Sprig till he surrenders.
Not only that but they
graffitied my tum-tum.
- Any luck on your end?
- Nope.
How are those kids supposed to make up
if they won't even see one another?
I know, right?
We've got to get them together.
But how?
Hey, Hop Pop.
You ever play capture the flag?
So I named my kid Alastair last night.
Wow, you're a good dad.
Personally, my favorite thing
about Alastair
is how he's not afraid to cry.
No! She's stealing the sacred flag!
Quick, sound the alarm!
Chief Polly, an old man
is climbing the flagpole.
Somebody get him!
For Hunter!
Ha! Got it!
Anne you did it.
- Gotcha.
- Hun.
For Hunter!
Eh, he'll be fine.
Whee!
No Hop Pop yet.
Oh, man.
- I hope he was able to get the flag
- Watch out!
- Whoo! Both flags captured.
- Now what?
Now this.
Haha! Tricked you all!
Now that you're face-to-face, how about
discussing this like civilized
So, older brother,
you here to finally admit I'm right
and surrender to the, Hunter tribe?
- Death first!
- Then perish!
Take this. Fruits.
Well, at least we brought them
together to clear the air, right?
Too bad they couldn't
Retreat, my deer brethren!
After those wimpy deer cowards!
Hail Hunter.
Wait
Something's off.
It's a trap.
Ambush!
You lose, Polly. Looks like your special
treatment couldn't help you this time.
Now just surrender
Enough talk! Let her have it!
Uh, what?
Incoming!
That's what
older brothers do, Sprig.
They look out for their little sisters.
What have I done?
No!
Why? Sprig I don't understand.
Why?
Because seeing you in danger
made me realise
it doesn't matter what's fair.
What matters is that I'm here
to take care of you.
We surrender, Polly.
We surrender.
Bro brother. No
No!
Hoo! All right, folks.
Pack it in, we're done.
Yeah, this thing is pretty played out.
Wait, what?
Glad I finally got a chance
to use this bad boy.
Now, that was exciting.
You guys were at each other's throats
just a second ago.
Are you seriously over this already?
Oh, that's just the way we are, Anne.
You should have seen last year's
avocados versus almonds fiasco.
We almost tore this place to the ground.
Whew, good thing it's over. I don't even
remember what we were fighting about.
I can't believe we almost killed
each other over a work of fiction.
I know, right?
Can we watch another one?
Hey, Sprig, over here.
- I saved you a spot.
- And I brought you some sweets.
You're a good older brother Sprig.
Aww, well ain't that nice.
Now scooch over. I need a seat.
Hello, everyone!
For tonight, I've picked
a conflict-free independent film called.
My Dinner with Anders.
- But before we start, a little context.
- Just start the movie!
You got it.
Hey, Hop Pop! Got the groceries!
Couldn't buy much since we've
barely got any money left.
Feeling any better, Hop Pop?
No. Ever since we lost
the vegetable stand,
I've just felt, well, lost.
I was fine the first couple of days,
but it's really starting
to catch up with me.
Well, maybe this will cheer you up.
- Pa-pow!
- The Grub-N-Go's hiring greeters.
All you gotta do is smile and be friendly.
Just another job for me to lose.
- See? You're a natural.
- Now head out there
and get back in the game.
Lemme go! The couch is the only
one who understands me!
Oh! thank you Mr. Plantar don't call us.
We'll call you.
Got to get ready!
What's all this rabble?
Sign-ups for the election!
You been living under a rock?
- 'Cause I have and even I knew that.
- Election?
Vote Mayor Toadstool! If reelected,
I will always look out for the little guy.
Upsy-daisy.
Some mayor.
That guy keeps raising our taxes,
and what do we got to show for it?
Our snail-ways a mess.
Our buildings are falling apart.
Heck, we ain't even
replaced the school house
after last year's millipede incident.
Am I crazy or is he making sense?
Maybe we need a mayor who looks out
for the people he's mayoring.
'Cause ours, well
He's only looking out for himself.
Anyway, good afternoon, everybody.
I nominate Hopadiah Plantar for mayor!
- I second that!
- I third it.
Let's hear it for Hopadiah!
Sounds good to me.
Hop Pop for mayor, everyone.
Guess what, kids!
- You passed the interview?
- You have a job?
Nope! I'm running for mayor.
Don't you see, kids?
If I win this election,
I'll prove once and for all
that Hopadiah Plantar ain't no loser!
Oh, no. If he loses,
he'll be more down than ever.
And we just got the couch cleaned.
But if he wins maybe we'll
get the old Hop Pop back!
- True that.
- Fair point.
Hop Pop, we're all in!
Really? Aw, kids.
I won't let you down.
If anyone needs me,
I'll be in the bathroom
practicing my distinguished expression!
Ugh. Politics are the worst.
Yeah. The monster fights
are pretty cool, though.
The what now?
You made a powerful enemy today Hopadiah.
Toads have run uncontested for decades.
This is a disgrace.
The only disgrace is you as mayor.
Oh, I like this Hopadiah.
I don't know. Toadstool is tried and true.
Ahem! Welcome
to the official mayoral trials,
where the candidates try to win your vote.
I'm suddenly very interested in politics.
Okay, Anne. That's enough.
Our first trial is all about strength.
The first candidate
to mount the beetle wins!
- [Beetle roars]
- Ready-set-go!
Oh, my giblets!
I've got you! No I don't.
Hey!
Come and get it.
The second trial is about sensitivity.
Can you figure out what
these hatchlings need?
A good mayor would.
I know what these dumb birds want. Money.
All right, all right.
Here's your handout.
- There, there, sir.
- Hmm
- Aww
- That's how he fed us
when we were babies.
Being mayor is a lot like
being dropped in the woods naked
and forced to find your way home.
So that's what we did.
Thanks for showing me the way Jeremy.
Safe travels, brother.
Yeah! Whoo!
Hop Pop! Hop Pop!
This is getting out of hand, Toadie.
I could actually lose!
Looks like we'll have to stop him
Ow! the old-fashioned way.
Illegally.
Excited for the final trial
tomorrow, Hop Pop?
Not really.
I know I've been doing well,
but if I mess up tomorrow,
it could cost us the election.
Mr. Plantar, an anonymous
associate would like to speak with you.
- You mean the mayor?
- No comment.
Come on man. You only know
like one person!
I said no comment!
Ah, so glad you could join me, Plantar.
I'll give it to you straight.
I want you to lose tomorrow's trial.
Well, yeah. I figured.
No, you dimwit, lose on purpose!
In return, I'll give you a new
vegetable stand.
Heck, I'll put it in the center
of the market, tax free!
You'll make tons of money.
That's, uh hard to say no to.
Well, then, don't.
Hey, Hop Pop.
So, uh. What did the mayor want?
If I lose on purpose,
Toadstool will give us the stand back.
What? No!
You've got a real chance to win.
He'll also make us rich.
We'd be set for life.
Oh, in that case, take the deal.
Polly!
We were all thinking it!
Polly's right, guys.
It's just too good to pass up.
Well, whatever you pick,
- we'll be behind you, dude.
- All the way.
Thanks, kids.
Guess I've got some thinking to do.
Ladies and gentlephebians.
You know the candidates,
you've seen 'em fight monsters.
But for the final challenge,
you'll see them fight, each other!
Now you both know the rules.
Fight starts as soon as the bell rings.
What? Ring the bell?
Woah.
Ow! Okay, Plantar! You've put
on a good show but that's enough!
This can't be good.
Like we talked about.
Stay down, Plantar.
Get up!
You can do it!
Come on, Hop Pop!
Stay down!
What are you, crazy?
You could have been rich.
You could've had your stand back.
All you had to do was give up!
Why?
Because this is about more than just me.
That's a knockout!
Huh? Ring the bell!
- Hop Pop.
- Yeh.
Well, folks,
that wraps up the trials.
Now it's time to tally the votes!
With 88 votes, 100% of Wartwood,
Hopadiah Plantar!
What? I won?
And with 22,000 votes,
The entire rest of the Valley,
Mayor Toadstool!
What?
Congratulation Sir.
Thank you. Thank you all.
You're all too kind. Democracy wins again!
Well, you certainly gave
this toad a run for his money.
Good thing you didn't win
though, huh?
A frog beating a toad.
That would have made headlines!
Just be proud the whole town loved ya.
I'm surprised the rest
of the valley didn't.
How was I supposed to know
the rest of the valley got a vote?
I'm a theater major, for cricket's sake!
Wait, wait now.
You didn't campaign outside Wartwood?
Oh, son. That's just sad. Really is.
Almost takes the joy out of my victory.
The victory piñata is all
set up in the lobby, sir.
Well, I did say "almost."
Wahoo! Piñata! I'm gonna hit it.
Hey, Hop Pop you okay?
Yeah! I've never felt better.
Really? You know you lost, right?
Are you in shock? Is he in shock?
I may have lost,
but I stood my ground
and fought for something important
- and that feels good.
- Hopadiah
Uh, may we have a word?
We all pitched in and built you a stand.
For giving us something
better than produce
Hope.
You've made us all proud.
I may have lost the race,
but I'm back at the market
with all of you.
And that makes me a winner.
This is perfect.
I wouldn't have put the root vegetables
with the tubers though.
It's not important.
I'll fix it later.