Black-ish (2014) s01e12 Episode Script

Dr.
Martin Luther King Jr Visionary leader, commanding orator, and disciple of nonviolence.
No matter what they threw at him, he always managed to keep his temper in line and, arguably equally important, his mustache.
I mean, this thing is always on point.
So every year, to properly celebrate Martin Luther King Day, the Johnsons partake in a longstanding tradition we in the community call "Black Ski Weekend.
" All right, Johnson clan.
Everybody fitting into their ski gear from last year so we can tear it up on Saturday? - Yep.
- Nope.
- What?! - I'm good.
You can't ski in that.
Oh, exactly.
I don't plan on skiing much.
I plan on looking incredible while I relax in the lodge.
We are Johnsons we ski! And ski and ski.
And ski.
Until all our tears are frozen.
Zach's gonna teach me to snowboard.
- Thanks again, Mr.
J, for inviting me on your trip.
- Mm-hmm.
My family usually teaches literacy at the local prison for MLK day.
How come we never do anything like that for Martin Luther King Day? Uh, because we're black all year long.
They're white.
They have to do extra credit.
- Solid comeback.
- Yeah.
Thank you.
Plus our family ski trip is about breaking down the color barrier on the slopes.
Oh, interesting MLK fact The sound system for the march on Washington was sabotaged moments before the event.
Yeah, and Robert Kennedy sent the army in to fix it.
Come on.
I can do this in my sleep, rookie.
So can my kids.
Hit him with it, Zo-Zo.
Tell him about the march on Washington.
Don't you mean the march on Washington for jobs and freedom organized by the big six? Boom! And, Junior, tell him what happened at the march on Washington.
Total game changer.
People marched.
Uh On Washington.
Uh-huh.
Where Dr.
King gave his "I have a dream" speech, huh? Tell him about that, son.
I know the gist, but I always kind of zone out when people start to tell me about their dreams.
A half a million people traveled the country to hear that speech, and my son can't tell me anything about it? Actually, Mr.
J, I think the number was a little bit closer to 250,000.
Zach! Go home! - Okay.
- Bye.
Uh, you know what, Zach? I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Come back.
Give me my grape soda.
Now go home! Really? Black-ish - 01x12 - SEASON FINALE Martin Luther Skiing Day Dre, what are you doing? Babe, I cannot sleep at a time like this, all right? We raised a bad black person.
Okay.
That white boy knowing more about Martin Luther King than Junior is an embarrassment.
Look, there's certain trailblazing cultural icons that every black person should know.
Agreed.
- Obama, Tupac - Uh-huh.
Yep.
- Dave Chappelle.
- Mm.
Hell, I'd say Dr.
King's near the top of that list, wouldn't you? - Maybe even above Dave Chappelle.
- We should have taken them to the Martin Luther King Day parade.
Uh Nah.
Nah, the food's not that good.
Oh, parking's a nightmare.
They never fully close the street.
You could get hit.
Monday is not a great day for a parade.
Oh, my God! This is on us! We're the bad black people! Mnh-mnh! That's it.
That's it.
Time for a weekend-long family refresher course on all things king.
So we're not going skiing? - We're gonna stay home and relax? - What? Oh.
Are we going to the parade? Oh, God, no.
So, we are gonna have a lot to do on Monday, but I understand, Dre, Charlie, that it's a holiday for you two, so feel free to take the day off.
Enjoy that.
Oh, I will.
Hey, hey, hey.
Hold on, Charlie.
Uh, what do you mean "feel free to take the day off"? MLK is a national holiday, not a black holiday.
Obama's inauguration black holiday.
O.
J.
Getting off black holiday.
Roscoe's chicken and waffles grand opening.
Charlie, please, don't help me.
All right.
So, you mean to tell me that one day a year It's a white party up in here? Well Yeah one, two princes kneel before you that's what I said, now Look, Dre, I hear you loud and clear, so we'll see you guys on Monday.
What?! So now you trying to get me to come in on king day? Man, you out your mind.
Charlie, let's roll.
- Trippin'.
Work on king day.
- Yeah.
We out.
- You almost had us working on Monday.
- Mm.
That was too close.
You know what's too close, Charlie? Our pee streams.
Oh, that don't bother me none.
Uh, I see.
Uh, uh, w-what you doing this weekend? Oh, you know, just doing a little Martin Luther skiing.
You see what I did right there? Uh, not really.
But it sounds fun.
Me I'll be at home alone.
You know, Eustace is gonna be at his mom's house, and my selfish neighbor finally put a passcode on the Wi-Fi, so no Internet.
Mm.
Guess I'll look through these magazines I found.
Got a Redbook with Rachael Ray on the cover.
Yeah, but but skiing sounds nice.
- Mm.
Yeah.
- That's nice.
That's nice.
I never seen snow.
- You've never seen snow? - What is it like? Fine.
Man, y-y-you want to come with us, Charlie? I'd love to.
Uh Uh, wait a minute.
The girl twin isn't coming, is she? Uh She's kind of weird.
She's weird? All right! Good news, guys I've transformed our ride into a multiplatform audio-visual civil-rights teaching machine.
What? Who's ready to watch an uncut version of "Eyes on the Prize"? Ohh.
Great.
A 14-hour black-and-white documentary full of dog attacks, assassinations, and hosings.
Hey, I had to sit through that Justin Bieber biopic.
I'm allowed to have interests.
It's okay, guys.
We're still gonna have fun because some of us need some downtime so we don't unravel.
You know what I mean, Dre? - Uh-huh.
- Tell me you understand what I mean.
Uh I need you to tell me you understand what I mean.
Look in my eyes, and tell me you understand.
- I-I understand.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Thank you.
Sorry I'm late.
- Oh.
- I had to stop on the way.
Slurpees and nachos do not mix.
Unh-unh.
Get a bubble gut.
- You know what I'm talking about.
- Okay.
What's up, Junior? How you doing? - Zoey.
Hey.
- Hey.
- Little white boy I don't know.
- Oh.
Jack.
Diane.
Charles.
Okay, that is a cool car.
Can we ride with Charlie? No, no.
That does not sound like a good idea.
Mom.
What? - Could I see you for a moment? - Sure.
If you get Junior in that car, you could probably get reverend Dr.
Martin Luther dad in the car with him.
Ohh! Yes! Hey! - Hmm? - Why don't the boys go with you? Yeah! Oh, no, no, not you.
You're way too precious to me.
Good, because Junior is the bad black person who needs educating.
But after we get home, he'll be a bona fide black panther.
Actually, Dr.
King had problems with the black panthers.
Do you know who the black panthers had a problem with? Oh, d you know what? That sounds great! You teach your car, I'll teach my car.
Okay, that's a bet.
We'll see who's smarter after we get up there.
Okay.
Well, we know who's smarter The car that doesn't have the - What? - Huh? Shotgun! Seatbelts, please! All right, so, once again, what was the outcome of the Montgomery bus boycott? Dad, what is this, "black jeopardy"? I wish there was a "black jeopardy.
" Come on right after the "black wheel," then set me up for a night of watching "The Black Blacklist," starring James Spade.
Then I'll watch the news.
That's already black.
Charlie, seriously don't help me.
All right.
Junior, Montgomery bus boycott what's your answer? We get to sit where we want on the bus.
Mm.
Dad, we're on vacation.
This stuff happened, like, forever ago.
Enough with the trivia.
Trivia? Is that what you think this is, son? Trivia? In that moment, it hit me My son had no real understanding of prejudice.
Junior, this isn't just about history.
Prejudice is alive and well.
That's the reality.
And boom.
Ha ha! Look at that right there.
Right on time.
Oh, God! It's the cops! Charlie, uh I'm gonna hit my nitrous.
Hey, hey, Charlie, Charlie, Charlie! Relax, man.
Just pull over.
All right.
That's one way to play it.
But we weren't doing anything.
Exactly, son.
We're being pulled over for DWB.
- DWUB? - Driving While Black, idiot.
All right, everybody.
This is it.
Wallets in hands.
No sudden moves.
Zach, record this.
If anything happens, tell our story.
On it.
License and registration? Yeah, because he doesn't think we have it.
No, just a routine question.
- Mm-hmm.
- He's a diabetic.
Uh, I'm gonna give him some Now & Laters to get his sugar back.
Sure, like you ask everybody for their license and registration.
Stop playing, Dre.
Asking for license and registration We learn that on day one.
Oh, and what did you learn on day two? How to pull over a car full of law-abiding citizens? I'm not going back.
I swear to God I'm gonna hit my nitrous.
No, no, we weren't speeding, we weren't swerving, we weren't Your tags are expired, but I'm gonna let you guys go with a warning because it's a "holiday weekend.
" Uh, you see that? Air quotes.
It's a national holiday! Uh, so, Mr.
Johnson, did you just want me to e-mail you this footage? - Shut up, Zach, and give me my phone.
- Oh, okay.
Charlie, let's go.
I'm gonna need a minute.
My effort to open Junior's eyes to the reality of racial prejudice was off to a slow start.
Hopefully Bow was having better luck.
I'm all about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble I'm all about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble I'm all about that bass, 'bout that bass hey I'm bringing booty back! Hey, wait.
Shh, shh, shh.
It's your dad calling.
Diane, you are a go.
- Are you ready? Okay.
- Yes.
Okay.
Go.
So that was the center of the conflict between Malcolm X and Dr.
King.
- Bow? - Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm just busy passing on the legacy, babe.
How's it going in your car? Terrible.
We got pulled over by a friendly cop, and Junior still thinks the world is a safe place.
I'm glad that cop didn't look in the trunk.
Game over.
Face it, dad, the world's different from when you were growing up.
There's no midday dance shows on, nobody irons their jeans, and some cops are okay.
So, wait a minute.
You're not just teaching him about intolerance? You're actually seeking it out? Yes, because I actually care about the boy.
Okay, goodbye, lunatic! Uh - Ready? - Treble I'm all about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble I'm all about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble I'm bringing booty back! I knew I needed to teach Junior a real-life lesson about prejudice, and there's no better place to find it than a backwoods convenience store gratuitously named Whitey's.
Hey, now watch him give us the white-man once-over.
Hey, welcome, sir! How you doing?! Ah.
Here we go with this bull again.
- What are you talking about? - Hey, son, don't be fooled by his false friendliness, all right? It's an old, southern trick.
All right? They call it "the sweet tea.
" - Oh, really? - Mm-hmm.
All these things have names? Yes, they do, son, all of them From the "Alabama man slap" to the "Solange Knowles.
" As we walk through the store, notice how he watches us like a hawk.
He's reading a monster-truck magazine.
Yeah, he's gonna hop up any second, son.
Damn it, Jethro.
Time to take it up a notch.
What are you doing? IAm trying to make it look like I'm stealing something.
You are stealing stuff.
Shh! Shut up! You don't know what's going on.
Ah! You found the free candy.
Take as much as you want, sir Leftovers from Halloween.
Damn it.
Hey! What the hell are you doing? Why, I must try it before I buy it.
Charlie! All right, look I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you all to leave now.
Aha! Hmm, see, see? What makes you assume we're with him? Y'all got out of the same car together.
You walked in at the same time.
You just said his name.
See, son? I told you we were being watched.
Point proven.
This is the world in which we live.
An awesome world where whitey gives us free candy? Junior's extreme cluelessness was making me frustrated and hungry.
Hey, you're making a really? I'll get it.
Guys, the car ride was really fun, but your father really wants us to ski as a family, so we got to get back on track.
We got to wake up early tomorrow morning.
We got to buy our lift tickets.
We got to rent equipment.
Ooh! Mom, check this out In-room spa service.
- Zoey.
- Three words "Hot stone massage.
" Zoey, no.
We came here to ski.
We should ski.
They wrap your feet in Greek yogurt.
- Book it.
- I want a hot stone massage.
I'm a bundle of knots.
Me, too.
This unit on fractions has me stressed out.
Book 'em.
Oh, my God.
Okay.
You guys, is there actually a chance that we might relax - and have fun on this vacation? - I tried to show Junior some racism today, but it was thwarted by the cops and whitey.
Nope.
No chance.
Okay, so, Dre, I agree it's really important that Junior understand that racism still exists in the world, but we might not run into that this weekend.
So I resigned myself to a fun weekend without incident.
- Thank you.
- All right, thank you.
- Oh, h-hold on, babe.
- Wait.
Um, I was supposed to get, uh, adjoining rooms.
I'm sorry, sir.
That couple got the last ones.
And then there it was My golden opportunity.
Oh.
So, that couple got the last adjoining rooms, hmm? - Dre, Dre.
- What? Sweetie, it's okay.
don't do this.
It's okay.
- Bow, I'm not doing anything.
- Okay.
- I'm being done to, all right? - Mm-hmm.
Junior.
Junior.
You see what's going on here? I do.
About to ruin my vacation in three, two - Okay, listen, Ms.
Lady, ma'am.
- Here we go.
You and I both know that it's no coincidence that the only black family here Okay, one of the only black families here is being denied fair treatment.
I will not leave until I get adjoining rooms.
We just don't have any left.
Then make some, then! This place is full of rooms! Knock down a wall and adjoin a couple of them! That's our father.
Have you ever though about that? Our father.
And he's not going anywhere, either.
Nope.
He's one of the "good ones.
" We'll wake up every morning, and he'll still be there, trying.
I-I'm sorry, sir.
There there's nothing we can do.
Oh, nothing you can do.
Well, there's something I can do.
Uh I'm I'm so sorry.
Dre, what are you What are you doing? - I'm staging a sit-in.
- What? Hey, son.
Racism.
Take a stand.
By sitting down on a luggage cart? Adjoining! - Oh, my God.
- Adjoining! "Ad-join" me, guys! Come on! Sweetie, you made your point.
Let's get up.
Okay? - Oh, God! - Ohh! - Did you just "toddler" me? - This is a peaceful protest.
I "Gandhi'd" you.
Gandhi inspired the world.
You are a giant baby man.
Get up! No! Sir, please get off the cart.
- Get off the cart.
- I shall not be moved.
Wha please, take him away.
- Don't bring him back.
Take him.
- Junior, this is for you! - I don't want this, dad! - King, I'm free! Just take him.
Finding myself unfairly imprisoned like Dr.
King, I sat down to write my own "letter from Birmingham Jail.
" "Freedom, like adjoining rooms, is never given, but must be demanded by the oppressed.
" - Warm cookie? - No, thank you.
Uh, excuse me.
Are those snickerdoodles? - Yes.
- Thank you.
Hey.
I was beginning to think I'd never see you again.
I almost forgot what your face looked like.
It's been 12 minutes.
Look, you're free to go.
And we were upgraded to a suite.
I'm a hero.
Dre, I just found you crying in ski jail.
Okay, look I know I've been acting a little crazy lately, - but I'm worried about Junior.
- Uh-huh.
- What? - We've sheltered him so much.
What is he gonna do when something real happens? Sweetie, I'm worried about that, too, but you're ruining our vacation! Martin Luther king day is supposed to be a celebration of how far we've come.
I mean, think about it When this resort was built, we would not have been able to stay here.
This resort opened in 1988.
Point is every time I intubate a patient, I am reminded of how far we've come because of the accomplishments of "Dr.
King.
" Did you just air quote Dr.
King? No.
I am a medical doctor because of "Dr.
" King.
Are you hating on Dr.
King? No, he is a great man, Dre.
- He has a nobel peace prize, okay? - Mm-hmm.
- I do not have one.
- Mnh-mnh.
But if you were to have a heart attack, he would give a great speech, and I would keep you alive.
I just don't understand why we're called the same thing.
It's just - Wow.
- It's just I really don't like this side of you.
- What? - So I'm Tapping out.
Well, go ahead and tap out, but if you slip and fall, I'll just have to find you a PHD to help you.
- Oh.
- You know, with a book.
- Charlie? - We found him by chair nine.
He was holding two buttons and a carrot.
- Snow ain't no joke.
- Oh, my God.
The next morning, I was ready to get my vacation back on track and do some skiing.
Charlie.
Are you wearing dress slacks? Don't worry about it! I'm gonna tuck 'em into my socks.
Oh, man.
I forgot socks.
Sometimes when I'm talking to the Lord, I lose track of things.
Where's everybody else at? You know, Junior and Zach are on their way down now.
Everybody else must be on the slopes.
Knowing them, they couldn't wait to get out there.
Oh, this feels so good.
Would you like plain or vanilla Greek yogurt on your feet, ma'am? - Oh, one of each, please.
- Mm-hmm.
- Left, plain, right, vanilla.
- Mm-hmm.
- We'll find them on the mountain.
- Cool, cool.
- All right.
- Oh, hey, Junior, I want to apologize for being an idiot last night.
We're on vacation, so I will not force my agenda on you anymore.
I'll believe it when I see it, but cool.
Yeah, all right.
Let's get on this bus.
The racks are for skiers only.
Snowboarders and their boards take the rear seats.
But they're heavy.
Wow, we don't get racks, and we have to sit in the back of the bus? What are we, second-class citizens? Little bit.
These nice resorts It's a skier's world.
Ma'am, snowboarders sit in the back.
Can't you give me a break? - The bus is half empty.
- It's the rules.
That's not cool.
She's old and tired.
I'm only 40, and I slept Uh This is crazy.
Excuse me.
Can I say something? And then it happened.
When confronted with actual injustice, even if it was small-scale, in the spirit of Dr.
King, Junior knew how to step up.
I may be a newbie to snowboarding, but the way you're treating her, it's not right.
There's no difference between boarders and skiers.
We're all just people with wood strapped to our feet, sliding down a mountain.
I have a dream that one day we will not be judged by the size of our board, but by what we do in the pow-pow.
Because the snow doesn't care who we are.
It does not.
Snow plays for keeps.
Uh okay.
It just wants to be thrashed.
Free to thrash.
Free to thrash! Thank God almighty, we're free to thrash! Hey, that's my son, everybody! My son a stand-up dude.
Hey, that was kind of impressive, son.
I'm really proud of you.
It just didn't feel right not to say something.
I know that you think I've had it so easy that I don't see what's up, but I do.
I'm a black kid in a world where bad things happen to us.
They can happen to anyone.
And that's why I worry about you, son.
And I worry about you, too.
But you've got to believe that you've taught me enough to be careful, but also brave.
You're right.
It's really the same choice Frodo faced at the black gates of mordor.
All right, back of the bus, nerd.
Cannot have a moment with you.
I cannot.
So, we ended up having a good time after all A little bit of learning and a lot of relaxing.
In the end, it doesn't matter how you spend Dr.
King's weekend, just as long as you remember how he helped us all make it to the mountaintop.
This is exactly what I imagine heaven to be like.
This is my hell.