Kolchak: The Night Stalker (1974) s01e12 Episode Script
Mr. R.I.N.G.
Huh.
I don't know when exactly I was in this office last.
In some ways, it seems like I never left.
But, no, that's not right.
Well, for at least a few days I was away- far away in the hands of men with no faces and no names.
They broke me down, broke my story down, telling me how it hadn't happened the way I claimed.
A least I think that's what they did between injections.
Memories fade fast enough without chemical help, but if I don't tell this story now, I don't think I ever will.
And what was that date? April 2, Sunday, 11:25 p.
m.
Professor Avery Walker was working late.
Professor Walker was a member of a crack team of researchers, but tonight he was working alone.
He had received specific orders, and, being a fastidious man, he intended carrying out those orders to the letter.
Arnold Techman was an hour behind.
Techman was addicted to hot Texas chili, but it always made him sick and late, and that made the mail arrive late.
But tomorrow, it would arrive even later.
Good morning, one and all! Good morning, Carl.
Not that good.
Bye, Ron.
Enjoy yourself.
Thank you.
I'm going home to my city by the bay.
He got a raise? Not that I'm aware of.
He was promoted? Mm-mmm.
Well, then why is he so happy? You're in trouble.
Of course! I should've known all along.
Mr.
Vincenzo wants to see you.
Oh? Oh.
Well, here I go, right into the valley of death.
Good morning, Tony, and how are you this bright and beautiful day? Where've you been? It's only 10:30.
- Yesterday.
All day yesterday.
- Yesterday.
Oh, yesterday.
Yeah, yeah.
You know that Brindisi killing, the guy who was pushed into the lake up at West Falls? - It just didn't sound right to me, so I went up to West Falls to check it out.
- And? - It was right.
I was wrong.
- What you're trying to say is you spent the day fishing.
- I thought as long as I was up there- - You thought as long as you were up there, we could do without you.
Be careful, Kolchak.
One day we'll realize we can.
- Oh, Tony.
- Take care of this.
Take care of this.
"Dr.
Avery Walker, Nobel Prize winner, suffered a heart attack and died on Sunday evening.
" What do you want me to do, embalm him? He was big in computer science.
A lot of news value.
- We'll need an obit.
- So if he's that big, we've got him on file.
We do, but the last entry in the file was made in 1967.
It was scribbled so badly, I couldn't make it out.
It needs updating.
Updyke's in obits.
Get him.
Updyke is gone.
I sent him to cover a story which should have been yours if you'd been here.
The Mendenham trial.
- In San Francisco? - California.
You sent Upd-d- to San Franci- on- on- on my job? Need I say it, Carl? One either fishes or cuts bait.
Are you fired? I think I quit.
I think I just quit.
San Francisco, Golden Gate.
And he gave it to Updyke! Updyke.
Never mind.
Have a cup of coffee.
Do you know in the old days, they'd give the obituaries to the lowest form of animal life in the newsroom? Do you know that? Some things never change, Kolchak.
You should take some comfort in that.
The obituary material.
It must have slipped your mind.
This is Peters.
I have a report.
Allow me to say how sorry I am about your husband's untimely death, Mrs.
Walker.
Oh, yes, yes.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
That's very kind of you.
He was a fine man.
You knew Avery? No, of course not.
Not personally, of course.
By reputation, Nobel Prize and all of that.
It's a great loss.
Perhaps you can fill me in on some of the details of the manner of his passing.
They, uh- They said a heart attack.
You sure I can't get you a drink? No, thanks.
I never- "They"? The, uh, doctors up at, uh, Tyrell Institute, where- I, uh- That's where he was working.
I don't know that.
Nobody does.
It's very secret.
Hush, hush, hush.
Well- Government work, I think.
What sort of government work? I just told you.
Secret.
Well, I'm the soul of discretion.
So was my husband.
He didn't tell me a thing.
- Nothing? - RI NG.
"RI NG.
" Like in a telephone.
- That's what they were working on.
- What exactly is RI NG? All we can be certain of is that if Avery was working on it, it was a colossal bore.
I mean, they're all bored.
They're boring with their- their secret passwords and their secret clearances.
And- Do you know they wouldn't even let me see Avery? Not that I really wanted to.
He wasn't all that attractive alive.
Well, you did ask to see him though.
Certainly.
It seemed the right thing to do.
- Yeah.
And they refused.
- They said it would only upset me.
- I'll bet they let Leslie Dwyer see him.
- Who's he? He's a she.
Leslie Dwyer.
They worked together.
Played together too.
Hi there.
What ya readin'? Study it good.
We're gonna have a quiz later this afternoon.
Thinking I might get other information from the other woman, I headed toward Winnetka to see Dr.
Leslie Dwyer.
All units vicinity of Dumont and Winnetka Boulevard, a 241 in progress.
But as I got within a few blocks ofher address, I heard an opportunity to return to my normal, comfortable pursuits- the reportage of crime and mayhem and destruction.
No shooting! Hold your fire! Don't shoot! What's the matter with you? Why the cream puff treatment, huh? You guys are so gun happy, why didn't you shoot the fugitive? Are you a reporter? Me? No, the county assessor.
You're a reporter.
Could you tell me what happened, Mr.
- Carmichael.
Carmichael.
You're the head undertaker here.
Not undertaker, cosmetologist.
Cosmetologist.
I was overseeing some work by one of our trainee cosmeticians.
We heard this dreadful crash, and we found this fellow trying to break into our cosmetic storeroom.
What would he want in there? All we keep in there is the tools of our trade, so to speak- facial putty, color base, things like that.
As we ran in, he was trying to put all of those things into an aluminium suitcase.
Aluminium? Yes.
Oh! And we tried to stop him, but he broke my cosmetician's arm.
- Really? - Mr.
Carmichael, I wouldn't talk to the press if I were you.
I thought he was one of your men.
Hardly.
What would that superman of yours want with undertaker's wax, Captain? Cosmetologist, not undertaker.
Yes, of course, Mr.
Carmichael.
Thank you very much.
Good afternoon, sir.
You're dismissed.
Morning, Colonel! Can I help you, sir? Yeah, I'm with him.
With who, sir? With the colonel.
- Colonel who, sir? - Colonel Bat- Sir, I want you to back your car out of here and drive away.
All right.
I'm with I.
N.
S.
, and I'm doing a follow-up obituary on Dr.
Avery Walker.
- Why didn't you say that first? - I saw you and the gate.
- I thought it was a restricted area.
- It is a restricted area.
If you wanna know anything about Dr.
Walker, you'll have to phone our office of public information.
- What kind of an installation is this? - It's a restricted installation.
I mean, is it military or is it a private industry? What? That information is not available to the public.
If I call your office of public information, they won't give me the information that I require, right? That would depend entirely upon your clearance classification.
You're very good at that.
Thank you.
Now, sir, I want you to drive away from here.
If you don't, I want you to get out of the car.
I'll call my supervisor.
He may want to talk to you for a few hours.
No, thanks.
I'd better go take a couple lessons in double-talk.
Good idea.
Who is it? Telephone man.
RI NG.
Okay, is there a joke in here somewhere? I doubt it, 'cause you didn't laugh when I said "RI NG.
" Because I don't know what you're talking about and don't know who you are.
Good-bye.
Hello.
My name's Carl Kolchak, I.
N.
S.
Dr.
Dwyer, someone mentioned a project to me called RI NG, and there's something very, very weird going on.
I went up to Tyrell Institute, and I got the feeling that if I mentioned RI NG up there, that I'd spend this weekend in a concrete room with a giant joy buzzer strapped to my temple, so I thought I'd mention it to you instead.
You know, just sort of drop it down the well and see if it made a splash.
Yeah, it made a splash.
I've never heard of any project called RI NG.
What are you working on there at Tyrell Institute? I no longer work there.
- Why not? - The recession.
I was laid off.
- What were you working on? - My field is computers.
- There's nothing weird about it.
- Tell me.
- Do mortuaries give you a weird feeling? - What about it? Not long ago, only a few miles from right here, some guy single-handedly canceled the insurance policy of the Glengarry Mortuary- all for some undertaker's putty and a little rouge.
He took off, but, uh, you know where the trail led back to? - No.
- Right back to your alma mater, Tyrell Institute.
I can't help you.
Everything at Tyrell Institute is classified.
Including Dr.
Avery Walker's death? What is RI NG, and why were you let go from it? "Moral Man and Immoral Society, Niebhur.
" - I want you out.
- You know, you really sound like the stereotype version of the cold woman scientist, but you don't look it.
Soft hair, radiant eyes, the slender and lovely figure, obviously, underneath that diaphanous gown- attractive legs.
How about black eyes and broken legs? Uh-oh.
Are you up for that? I've already asked him to leave.
I gotta fly to New York this afternoon, and you're ruining what's left of a very pleasant visit.
I wouldn't want to do that to anyone.
Then take off.
Has anybody ever told you you look absolutely divine in red? Don't push too far.
You got a nick on your chin.
Or is it a bite? I had a series of phone calls working to my few friends in the news business.
They knew nothing about any Project R-I-N-G, RING, and only a little more about the Tyrell Institute.
But I was able to get one tidbit.
The senior member of the Appropriations Committee that funded Tyrell was our very own Senator Duncan LeBeau Stephens.
Well, what can I do for you, Mr.
Kolchak? You can tell me about RING, Senator.
"RI NG"? RI NG.
Tyrell Institute.
RI NG, you know.
Well, I know about Tyrell, of course.
But, uh, I'm sorry.
This RI NG- I'm sorry.
That's what they do up there.
I don't know where you get your information, Mr.
Kolchak, but at Tyrell, they were working on a highly secret project having to do with miniaturizing computers.
Since when is miniaturizing computers secret? Well, the military mind, Mr.
Kolchak, it thrives on secrecy.
The military mind, Senator, thrives on war.
Yeah, well, uh, I can't say any more.
I'm sorry.
I'm not familiar with this RI NG.
Well, are you familiar with Dr.
Avery Walker and his alleged heart attack? Oh, yes, I heard of his untimely death.
A tragedy.
A great man, a great mind.
That's all great stuff for the campaign trail, but we're not there right now, and I'm not exactlyJimmy Olsen, cub reporter.
So why don't we just talk to each other like two grown-up human beings, Senator? You work for I.
N.
S.
I.
N.
S.
That's right.
See, Carl Kolchak, I.
N.
S.
Ah.
- Miss Barham, Mr.
Kolchak is leaving now.
- I am? I am.
Do you validate? Miss Barham, when you're finished with him, I want you to get me General Brody at Tyrell Institute, and then I wanna speak to Peter Vreeland in Washington.
That I can understand.
Yes, I read you.
I said, I read you, sir.
Yes.
Tony, you won't believe what's been popping today.
Now, I'm not sure what's going on, but I have a feeling it'll make Watergate look like a pie fight.
Carl, I want you out in San Francisco on the Mendenham trial.
It's an emergency.
Uh-huh.
Updyke's on the Mendenham trial.
Yeah, but he had a big brouhaha with the artist who does the courtroom sketches.
Oh, yeah.
I'll make all the arrangements.
A room at the Mark Hopkins- one with a view.
Uh-huh.
Cracked crab tomorrow night at Bucco's.
Uh-huh.
They're putting the heat on you, right? It's bigger than I thought.
Terrific.
Carl, the home office just called, and they want to kill your story.
Leave the phone off the hook.
When they call back, they'll get a busy signal.
They'll get a disconnect! The building department wants to condemn this building because of your story.
Are you satisfied? Of course not.
There's a lot more to be found out about this Project RI NG.
Project what? Project what, exactly! And no one will answer that question.
But whatever RI NG is, Dr.
Avery Walker is a goner because of it, and there's a strong-armed maniac on the loose who has something to do with it.
Tony, this story's a blockbuster.
But it's the federal government, and it's my butt they're gonna bust, Carl.
I got a Washington correspondent who's suddenly persona non grata.
I got a U.
N.
Correspondent who's been denied a set of earphones.
You're kidding.
Just because of you and your RI NG.
Now, what is so important? What is so important? You really wanna know? Yes.
Sit down, Tony.
I don't wanna sit down.
Come on.
Sit down.
Sit down, Tony.
Come on.
That's right.
Tony, do you remember when you were a kid in grammar school, about 11 Oth and New Amsterdam? Remember? And they used to draw the tax dollar as a great big pie with one slice out- went for defense- and another slice went for social programs.
Yes.
And another slice went for- Yes, yes, Carl.
Yes, yes! Well, what they didn't tell you then was that your tax dollar wasn't buying just pie, it was buying pie a la mode.
No, that's right.
No, no.
There is a mysterious scoop of something on your tax dollar pie, and that something is Project RI NG.
- What? - Now, how would you feel if, at Manny's, you ordered pie a la mode, but they wouldn't tell you what flavor ice cream you're gonna get? Your apple pie might arrive with some horrible chocolate chip or butter brickle or, uh, rocky road.
I don't like rocky road.
I know you don't like rocky road.
You wouldn't let Manny push you around like that, would you? - No.
- Of course not.
Why should you let your government do it? Tony, I'm writing an obituary on Avery Walker.
Now, I have to know what he was working on, don't I? Don't I? Of course.
to scour the Congressional Record when I heard something that seemed infinitely more interesting.
Unit Hotel Ranger Papa.
Captain Akins, please proceed to Windsor Branch Chicago Public Library, Our friend from the mortuary, eh, Captain? No comment.
I think this guy's got a hang-up about using doors.
What do you think, Captain? No comment.
Name's Kolchak.
Yeah.
Real friendly fellas you got there.
Who are they? You know there's nothing for you around here.
Why don't you go home? I'll hang around just the same if you don't mind.
It's a public library.
I can't stop you.
Right.
But remember, around here they get rather harsh with loudmouths.
I'll whisper.
Did you see anything or hear anything? He was just throwing things every which way, and then when he saw me, he dropped everything and walked right through that wall.
Right through the wall, huh? Was he looking for anything in particular? Oh, I don't know.
He was in Philosophy and Humanities.
Philosophy and Humanities, huh? It's a mess.
Just look at the mess! Miss Jarell, would you mind stepping over there and talking to those gentlemen? Tell them anything you've seen or heard.
Los federales, huh? The same night, 11:25 p.
m.
The apartment of Dr.
Leslie Dwyer, lady computer expert and unexplained link with Books for the Blind.
As I was trying to fit all the pieces together, a worried Dr.
Dwyer returned home from a visit to a friend's house.
She wasn't aware that she herself had had a visitor- one that would change the course ofher life forever.
No.
No.
April 3, 7:00 a.
m.
The commuter rush hadn't yet begun as I drove along Lake Shore Drive.
A mild irony had gone through my mind as I stood in the library, staring at the Books for the Blind- that I was working blind, but that somehow, with her taped cassettes, Dr.
Dwyer had the direction I needed.
I tried to phone her several times and got no answer.
I soon found out why.
Hey, who are you? Kolchak.
Major Kolchak, retired.
I'm an old friend of Dr.
Dwyer's.
Where is she? What happened here? I'm sorry, Major.
We don't know.
Nobody heard anything.
The landlordjust happened to come up here and found this mess.
He called us.
Is this all you have? Well, a newsboy outside says he thought he saw a big guy wearing makeup.
Sounds like a sex crime to me.
Newsboy? Major, you're welcome to stay.
I can imagine your concern.
Thank you very much, but I'm supposed to be marching in a R.
O.
T.
C.
Parade.
I can't disappoint the cadets.
With Dr.
Dwyer vanished, I was blind again, and the only remaining person who might help me was probably still blind drunk.
I decided to tackle her anyway.
Oh, good afternoon, Mr.
Kolchak.
Can I offer you a drink? No.
No, thank you.
I see you're going away.
Yes, you bet I am.
I'm going far away.
I have sobered up- oh, yes, I have- sold the house, collected the insurance, and now I'm going to start enjoying myself.
Well, before you get down to the heavy enjoying, I was hoping you could tell me something more about RI NG.
I gave you Leslie Dwyer's address.
Ask her.
Well, she's disappeared.
- Anything serious? - Maybe.
Delighted to hear it.
Although, why should I care? I was, uh - I was a little sloshed when I told you they were having an affair.
They weren't, really.
It was a romance of the head.
He was besotted with her mind.
- There was nothing physical? - Avery? His idea of passion was a hot diode.
That and autonetics.
Auto- netics.
That was her field.
His was microcircuitry.
I never did quite understand the fine differences.
Have you ever been bored to tears? Yeah, I spent four years in high school, and the hanky never left my hand.
No, I mean really bored to tears.
- Mm-hmm.
- Physically ill, crawling out of your skin, ready to scream with boredom.
Mm-hmm! That's what it was like when the two of them got together with a few drinks in them.
And dumb me, forced to attend.
It was microcircuitry, stress patterns, functional abilities and- Siliconized limb plates, intelligence programming and joint malleability.
All right.
Enough, Carl.
Enough.
What does it all add up to? Autonetics.
Parla inglese, will you, Carl? A robot.
Tony, I believe that this robot is Project RI NG, and I also believe he's developed a mind of his own.
He probably decided enough was enough and decided to split from Tyrell Institute.
Enough of what is enough? You're talking about a glorified adding machine.
What mind? How many times have you heard that by Up at Tyrell, they've just advanced the calendar a few years.
What happens now - besides the fact that I'll be the first newsman shot by a military firing squad? I think that RI NG came for Leslie Dwyer.
Why? I don't know.
And he carted her off someplace.
He killed Avery Walker, I think, and maybe he's killed her too, so I'm gonna try to find out.
And then? Then we'll have the biggest cover-up story since- Don't say it again.
We may not be able to do the story anyway.
What do you mean, we may not be able to do the story? What, more pressure? No, I got a bulletin today.
They may have to restrict the use of our wire.
Who? A political problem in El Salvador may turn into a national emergency.
That means they'll have to use our wire for military messages.
Well, don't you worry about a thing, Tony.
When those El Salvadorian panzer divisions rumble down the streets of our fair city, I'll be right with you, manning the barricades - Carl.
Ready to hurl an epithet- Carl, Carl, Carl- Will you please go, Carl, and leave the jokes to Charlie McCarthy? Please go! Sure.
Well, thank you very much.
Well? Well, there are five branch libraries in the city that carry Books for the Blind.
They call them talking books.
Four of them are no earthly good to us at all, and the fifth had just lent out the following.
"St.
Thomas Aquinas.
'" Uh-huh.
"Moral Man and Immoral Society, '" by Niebhur.
Yeah.
And "Aristotle's Ethics.
'" That's the one! Did you get the name of the borrower? They wouldn't give out information like that.
- Have you got the telephone number of the library? - That's it right there.
Hello.
Braille Library? Yes, I understand that you lent out several ethical philosophy tapes today.
Yes, that's right.
Those are the ones.
When I was a cub reporter in the Windy City, there used to be a big book in the file room that listed phone numbers in numerical order and provided the addresses they corresponded to.
In those days, it was great for finding girls whose numbers you might find, well, somewhere.
That book doesn't exist anymore, but I still have some contacts who can perform the same function for a fee.
In a very short time, I had the address of the girl I was looking for, Dr.
Leslie Dwyer.
She had placed the phone call from a large summer home, north, along the shore of Lake Michigan.
How did you find me? What difference does that make? Look, just get out.
This is a private home.
Yes, but RI NG is a public project built with the hard-earned dollars of the people.
Forget them.
It was built with my hard-earned dollars, and I wanna find out what's going on.
Dr.
Avery Walker was a friend of yours, wasn't he? Wasn't he? Now, his wife doesn't care how he died, but he might have a family or some friends who deserve some few words of explanation.
Look, I, um- I don't know where to begin.
Well, I don't either.
Why don't we start with nomenclature? What is RI NG- R- I-N-G, RI NG- supposed to mean? RI NG comes from Robomatic Internalized Nerve Ganglia.
It was never intended to kill.
RI NG murdered Avery, because RI NG didn't wanna die.
A machine die? No, that doesn't track for me.
When RI NG was conceived, I was to oversee and design his programming.
There was a lot of quibbling up at Tyrell, bickering back and forth over what kind of programming RI NG should have.
With the military there, they had to get their two cents into it.
They wanted aggression put into RI NG's programming.
I opposed it.
So they drummed you out of the corps, hmm? They hardly gave me time to clear out my desk.
Avery was given the job of deactivating RI NG, and unfortunately for Avery, he never really understood how far we'd gotten with RI NG.
We'd given him a survival instinct.
A survival instinct? In a machine? RI NG has sensitivities, likes, dislikes, wants.
He wanted to live, so he killed Avery.
I've been trying to complete his moral and ethical programs.
RI NG himself was hungry for a set of guidelines.
That's why he went for the philosophy tapes.
Good gosh! He won't hurt you.
He won't hurt me? He just went through the door! No, he won't hurt you.
I told you.
He has sensitivities and wants.
Sure, sure.
Turn him around.
Put him in reverse.
Make him stop.
RING, please stop.
- Talk to him.
- Talk to him? Wh-Wh-What about? Ask him a question.
Let him do what he does best.
He made this mask to look human.
You don't need this.
- Talk to him.
- Sure.
Hello, RI NG.
Uh, what time is it? Considering the expense of my development, it would be wasteful to utilize me for simply telling time, especially since I do not wear a watch.
The prudent option would be to consult a rudimentary clock.
Makes sense.
Aha.
What's pi to the 12th? Well, I wouldn't know whether he's right or wrong.
Who's the father of modern psychology? Sigmund Freud is commonly given that appellation, but that is more in terms of classical analysis.
In the study of pure behavior, both Ivan Pavlov and Wilhelm Wundt would have to qualify as well.
You, uh-You said he speaks languages, right? Say it in French.
What's the difference between right and wrong? What is the difference between right and wrong? No philosopher and no tape can answer that question.
Can you? Who had the greater right to life, you or Dr.
Avery Walker? RI NG could've taken your life when you entered this house.
He didn't.
- He waited to find out how you work.
- How I work? Ethically, emotionally, he's still a child.
After all, he's only a few days old.
He needs time to grow.
- He's still ticking.
- RI NG, please cease computation.
RI NG.
Did someone follow you? I haven't the faintest idea.
That's a whole bloomin' army.
Doctor, this is Colonel Wright.
You and Mr.
Kolchak have exactly one minute to come out.
He came to me like a frightened child, with his new face and clothes.
He tried to make himself presentable to me.
He didn't mean to hurt anyone.
He just didn't understand.
Doctor, please cooperate.
RI NG, these are our friends.
They won't hurt us.
Let me talk to 'em.
I've always had a knack with the guys in uniform.
Well, where are the tanks and the howitzers? Isn't there any other way for you guys to handle this? How uptight can you be? Mr.
Kolchak, step aside and keep your mouth shut.
Dr.
Dwyer, please come down here at once and bring the robot with you.
You're gonna upset him.
He considers this his own home.
- Will you wait a minute? - Doctor.
Hands off the press! Move back, and put those stupid guns down.
Come down.
It's all right.
I'm going first.
See? Take her.
No, no! Don't do that! Take him! RI NG, don't! - Well, are you satisfied? - RI NG.
Alpha, beta, gamma, delta.
Leslie, Leslie.
Mama.
Ma-ma.
Hey, wait just one minute, boys.
I don't even know where they took me now.
At least I can't be sure.
Maybe it was Tyrell Institute, but it could just as well have been the Black Hills of South Dakota for all I know.
Was there a drug? Pentothal? Scopolamine? I can't be sure of that either, though there must've been something.
I can't even be sure the events ever happened the way I've told them.
Perhaps when I'm completely back in this world, I'll turn on this tape and not believe any of it myself, but I doubt it.
Because I believe that somewhere, someplace, they or someone else will put some other RI NG together without the help of Leslie Dwyer.
And who- Who will program him then?
I don't know when exactly I was in this office last.
In some ways, it seems like I never left.
But, no, that's not right.
Well, for at least a few days I was away- far away in the hands of men with no faces and no names.
They broke me down, broke my story down, telling me how it hadn't happened the way I claimed.
A least I think that's what they did between injections.
Memories fade fast enough without chemical help, but if I don't tell this story now, I don't think I ever will.
And what was that date? April 2, Sunday, 11:25 p.
m.
Professor Avery Walker was working late.
Professor Walker was a member of a crack team of researchers, but tonight he was working alone.
He had received specific orders, and, being a fastidious man, he intended carrying out those orders to the letter.
Arnold Techman was an hour behind.
Techman was addicted to hot Texas chili, but it always made him sick and late, and that made the mail arrive late.
But tomorrow, it would arrive even later.
Good morning, one and all! Good morning, Carl.
Not that good.
Bye, Ron.
Enjoy yourself.
Thank you.
I'm going home to my city by the bay.
He got a raise? Not that I'm aware of.
He was promoted? Mm-mmm.
Well, then why is he so happy? You're in trouble.
Of course! I should've known all along.
Mr.
Vincenzo wants to see you.
Oh? Oh.
Well, here I go, right into the valley of death.
Good morning, Tony, and how are you this bright and beautiful day? Where've you been? It's only 10:30.
- Yesterday.
All day yesterday.
- Yesterday.
Oh, yesterday.
Yeah, yeah.
You know that Brindisi killing, the guy who was pushed into the lake up at West Falls? - It just didn't sound right to me, so I went up to West Falls to check it out.
- And? - It was right.
I was wrong.
- What you're trying to say is you spent the day fishing.
- I thought as long as I was up there- - You thought as long as you were up there, we could do without you.
Be careful, Kolchak.
One day we'll realize we can.
- Oh, Tony.
- Take care of this.
Take care of this.
"Dr.
Avery Walker, Nobel Prize winner, suffered a heart attack and died on Sunday evening.
" What do you want me to do, embalm him? He was big in computer science.
A lot of news value.
- We'll need an obit.
- So if he's that big, we've got him on file.
We do, but the last entry in the file was made in 1967.
It was scribbled so badly, I couldn't make it out.
It needs updating.
Updyke's in obits.
Get him.
Updyke is gone.
I sent him to cover a story which should have been yours if you'd been here.
The Mendenham trial.
- In San Francisco? - California.
You sent Upd-d- to San Franci- on- on- on my job? Need I say it, Carl? One either fishes or cuts bait.
Are you fired? I think I quit.
I think I just quit.
San Francisco, Golden Gate.
And he gave it to Updyke! Updyke.
Never mind.
Have a cup of coffee.
Do you know in the old days, they'd give the obituaries to the lowest form of animal life in the newsroom? Do you know that? Some things never change, Kolchak.
You should take some comfort in that.
The obituary material.
It must have slipped your mind.
This is Peters.
I have a report.
Allow me to say how sorry I am about your husband's untimely death, Mrs.
Walker.
Oh, yes, yes.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
That's very kind of you.
He was a fine man.
You knew Avery? No, of course not.
Not personally, of course.
By reputation, Nobel Prize and all of that.
It's a great loss.
Perhaps you can fill me in on some of the details of the manner of his passing.
They, uh- They said a heart attack.
You sure I can't get you a drink? No, thanks.
I never- "They"? The, uh, doctors up at, uh, Tyrell Institute, where- I, uh- That's where he was working.
I don't know that.
Nobody does.
It's very secret.
Hush, hush, hush.
Well- Government work, I think.
What sort of government work? I just told you.
Secret.
Well, I'm the soul of discretion.
So was my husband.
He didn't tell me a thing.
- Nothing? - RI NG.
"RI NG.
" Like in a telephone.
- That's what they were working on.
- What exactly is RI NG? All we can be certain of is that if Avery was working on it, it was a colossal bore.
I mean, they're all bored.
They're boring with their- their secret passwords and their secret clearances.
And- Do you know they wouldn't even let me see Avery? Not that I really wanted to.
He wasn't all that attractive alive.
Well, you did ask to see him though.
Certainly.
It seemed the right thing to do.
- Yeah.
And they refused.
- They said it would only upset me.
- I'll bet they let Leslie Dwyer see him.
- Who's he? He's a she.
Leslie Dwyer.
They worked together.
Played together too.
Hi there.
What ya readin'? Study it good.
We're gonna have a quiz later this afternoon.
Thinking I might get other information from the other woman, I headed toward Winnetka to see Dr.
Leslie Dwyer.
All units vicinity of Dumont and Winnetka Boulevard, a 241 in progress.
But as I got within a few blocks ofher address, I heard an opportunity to return to my normal, comfortable pursuits- the reportage of crime and mayhem and destruction.
No shooting! Hold your fire! Don't shoot! What's the matter with you? Why the cream puff treatment, huh? You guys are so gun happy, why didn't you shoot the fugitive? Are you a reporter? Me? No, the county assessor.
You're a reporter.
Could you tell me what happened, Mr.
- Carmichael.
Carmichael.
You're the head undertaker here.
Not undertaker, cosmetologist.
Cosmetologist.
I was overseeing some work by one of our trainee cosmeticians.
We heard this dreadful crash, and we found this fellow trying to break into our cosmetic storeroom.
What would he want in there? All we keep in there is the tools of our trade, so to speak- facial putty, color base, things like that.
As we ran in, he was trying to put all of those things into an aluminium suitcase.
Aluminium? Yes.
Oh! And we tried to stop him, but he broke my cosmetician's arm.
- Really? - Mr.
Carmichael, I wouldn't talk to the press if I were you.
I thought he was one of your men.
Hardly.
What would that superman of yours want with undertaker's wax, Captain? Cosmetologist, not undertaker.
Yes, of course, Mr.
Carmichael.
Thank you very much.
Good afternoon, sir.
You're dismissed.
Morning, Colonel! Can I help you, sir? Yeah, I'm with him.
With who, sir? With the colonel.
- Colonel who, sir? - Colonel Bat- Sir, I want you to back your car out of here and drive away.
All right.
I'm with I.
N.
S.
, and I'm doing a follow-up obituary on Dr.
Avery Walker.
- Why didn't you say that first? - I saw you and the gate.
- I thought it was a restricted area.
- It is a restricted area.
If you wanna know anything about Dr.
Walker, you'll have to phone our office of public information.
- What kind of an installation is this? - It's a restricted installation.
I mean, is it military or is it a private industry? What? That information is not available to the public.
If I call your office of public information, they won't give me the information that I require, right? That would depend entirely upon your clearance classification.
You're very good at that.
Thank you.
Now, sir, I want you to drive away from here.
If you don't, I want you to get out of the car.
I'll call my supervisor.
He may want to talk to you for a few hours.
No, thanks.
I'd better go take a couple lessons in double-talk.
Good idea.
Who is it? Telephone man.
RI NG.
Okay, is there a joke in here somewhere? I doubt it, 'cause you didn't laugh when I said "RI NG.
" Because I don't know what you're talking about and don't know who you are.
Good-bye.
Hello.
My name's Carl Kolchak, I.
N.
S.
Dr.
Dwyer, someone mentioned a project to me called RI NG, and there's something very, very weird going on.
I went up to Tyrell Institute, and I got the feeling that if I mentioned RI NG up there, that I'd spend this weekend in a concrete room with a giant joy buzzer strapped to my temple, so I thought I'd mention it to you instead.
You know, just sort of drop it down the well and see if it made a splash.
Yeah, it made a splash.
I've never heard of any project called RI NG.
What are you working on there at Tyrell Institute? I no longer work there.
- Why not? - The recession.
I was laid off.
- What were you working on? - My field is computers.
- There's nothing weird about it.
- Tell me.
- Do mortuaries give you a weird feeling? - What about it? Not long ago, only a few miles from right here, some guy single-handedly canceled the insurance policy of the Glengarry Mortuary- all for some undertaker's putty and a little rouge.
He took off, but, uh, you know where the trail led back to? - No.
- Right back to your alma mater, Tyrell Institute.
I can't help you.
Everything at Tyrell Institute is classified.
Including Dr.
Avery Walker's death? What is RI NG, and why were you let go from it? "Moral Man and Immoral Society, Niebhur.
" - I want you out.
- You know, you really sound like the stereotype version of the cold woman scientist, but you don't look it.
Soft hair, radiant eyes, the slender and lovely figure, obviously, underneath that diaphanous gown- attractive legs.
How about black eyes and broken legs? Uh-oh.
Are you up for that? I've already asked him to leave.
I gotta fly to New York this afternoon, and you're ruining what's left of a very pleasant visit.
I wouldn't want to do that to anyone.
Then take off.
Has anybody ever told you you look absolutely divine in red? Don't push too far.
You got a nick on your chin.
Or is it a bite? I had a series of phone calls working to my few friends in the news business.
They knew nothing about any Project R-I-N-G, RING, and only a little more about the Tyrell Institute.
But I was able to get one tidbit.
The senior member of the Appropriations Committee that funded Tyrell was our very own Senator Duncan LeBeau Stephens.
Well, what can I do for you, Mr.
Kolchak? You can tell me about RING, Senator.
"RI NG"? RI NG.
Tyrell Institute.
RI NG, you know.
Well, I know about Tyrell, of course.
But, uh, I'm sorry.
This RI NG- I'm sorry.
That's what they do up there.
I don't know where you get your information, Mr.
Kolchak, but at Tyrell, they were working on a highly secret project having to do with miniaturizing computers.
Since when is miniaturizing computers secret? Well, the military mind, Mr.
Kolchak, it thrives on secrecy.
The military mind, Senator, thrives on war.
Yeah, well, uh, I can't say any more.
I'm sorry.
I'm not familiar with this RI NG.
Well, are you familiar with Dr.
Avery Walker and his alleged heart attack? Oh, yes, I heard of his untimely death.
A tragedy.
A great man, a great mind.
That's all great stuff for the campaign trail, but we're not there right now, and I'm not exactlyJimmy Olsen, cub reporter.
So why don't we just talk to each other like two grown-up human beings, Senator? You work for I.
N.
S.
I.
N.
S.
That's right.
See, Carl Kolchak, I.
N.
S.
Ah.
- Miss Barham, Mr.
Kolchak is leaving now.
- I am? I am.
Do you validate? Miss Barham, when you're finished with him, I want you to get me General Brody at Tyrell Institute, and then I wanna speak to Peter Vreeland in Washington.
That I can understand.
Yes, I read you.
I said, I read you, sir.
Yes.
Tony, you won't believe what's been popping today.
Now, I'm not sure what's going on, but I have a feeling it'll make Watergate look like a pie fight.
Carl, I want you out in San Francisco on the Mendenham trial.
It's an emergency.
Uh-huh.
Updyke's on the Mendenham trial.
Yeah, but he had a big brouhaha with the artist who does the courtroom sketches.
Oh, yeah.
I'll make all the arrangements.
A room at the Mark Hopkins- one with a view.
Uh-huh.
Cracked crab tomorrow night at Bucco's.
Uh-huh.
They're putting the heat on you, right? It's bigger than I thought.
Terrific.
Carl, the home office just called, and they want to kill your story.
Leave the phone off the hook.
When they call back, they'll get a busy signal.
They'll get a disconnect! The building department wants to condemn this building because of your story.
Are you satisfied? Of course not.
There's a lot more to be found out about this Project RI NG.
Project what? Project what, exactly! And no one will answer that question.
But whatever RI NG is, Dr.
Avery Walker is a goner because of it, and there's a strong-armed maniac on the loose who has something to do with it.
Tony, this story's a blockbuster.
But it's the federal government, and it's my butt they're gonna bust, Carl.
I got a Washington correspondent who's suddenly persona non grata.
I got a U.
N.
Correspondent who's been denied a set of earphones.
You're kidding.
Just because of you and your RI NG.
Now, what is so important? What is so important? You really wanna know? Yes.
Sit down, Tony.
I don't wanna sit down.
Come on.
Sit down.
Sit down, Tony.
Come on.
That's right.
Tony, do you remember when you were a kid in grammar school, about 11 Oth and New Amsterdam? Remember? And they used to draw the tax dollar as a great big pie with one slice out- went for defense- and another slice went for social programs.
Yes.
And another slice went for- Yes, yes, Carl.
Yes, yes! Well, what they didn't tell you then was that your tax dollar wasn't buying just pie, it was buying pie a la mode.
No, that's right.
No, no.
There is a mysterious scoop of something on your tax dollar pie, and that something is Project RI NG.
- What? - Now, how would you feel if, at Manny's, you ordered pie a la mode, but they wouldn't tell you what flavor ice cream you're gonna get? Your apple pie might arrive with some horrible chocolate chip or butter brickle or, uh, rocky road.
I don't like rocky road.
I know you don't like rocky road.
You wouldn't let Manny push you around like that, would you? - No.
- Of course not.
Why should you let your government do it? Tony, I'm writing an obituary on Avery Walker.
Now, I have to know what he was working on, don't I? Don't I? Of course.
to scour the Congressional Record when I heard something that seemed infinitely more interesting.
Unit Hotel Ranger Papa.
Captain Akins, please proceed to Windsor Branch Chicago Public Library, Our friend from the mortuary, eh, Captain? No comment.
I think this guy's got a hang-up about using doors.
What do you think, Captain? No comment.
Name's Kolchak.
Yeah.
Real friendly fellas you got there.
Who are they? You know there's nothing for you around here.
Why don't you go home? I'll hang around just the same if you don't mind.
It's a public library.
I can't stop you.
Right.
But remember, around here they get rather harsh with loudmouths.
I'll whisper.
Did you see anything or hear anything? He was just throwing things every which way, and then when he saw me, he dropped everything and walked right through that wall.
Right through the wall, huh? Was he looking for anything in particular? Oh, I don't know.
He was in Philosophy and Humanities.
Philosophy and Humanities, huh? It's a mess.
Just look at the mess! Miss Jarell, would you mind stepping over there and talking to those gentlemen? Tell them anything you've seen or heard.
Los federales, huh? The same night, 11:25 p.
m.
The apartment of Dr.
Leslie Dwyer, lady computer expert and unexplained link with Books for the Blind.
As I was trying to fit all the pieces together, a worried Dr.
Dwyer returned home from a visit to a friend's house.
She wasn't aware that she herself had had a visitor- one that would change the course ofher life forever.
No.
No.
April 3, 7:00 a.
m.
The commuter rush hadn't yet begun as I drove along Lake Shore Drive.
A mild irony had gone through my mind as I stood in the library, staring at the Books for the Blind- that I was working blind, but that somehow, with her taped cassettes, Dr.
Dwyer had the direction I needed.
I tried to phone her several times and got no answer.
I soon found out why.
Hey, who are you? Kolchak.
Major Kolchak, retired.
I'm an old friend of Dr.
Dwyer's.
Where is she? What happened here? I'm sorry, Major.
We don't know.
Nobody heard anything.
The landlordjust happened to come up here and found this mess.
He called us.
Is this all you have? Well, a newsboy outside says he thought he saw a big guy wearing makeup.
Sounds like a sex crime to me.
Newsboy? Major, you're welcome to stay.
I can imagine your concern.
Thank you very much, but I'm supposed to be marching in a R.
O.
T.
C.
Parade.
I can't disappoint the cadets.
With Dr.
Dwyer vanished, I was blind again, and the only remaining person who might help me was probably still blind drunk.
I decided to tackle her anyway.
Oh, good afternoon, Mr.
Kolchak.
Can I offer you a drink? No.
No, thank you.
I see you're going away.
Yes, you bet I am.
I'm going far away.
I have sobered up- oh, yes, I have- sold the house, collected the insurance, and now I'm going to start enjoying myself.
Well, before you get down to the heavy enjoying, I was hoping you could tell me something more about RI NG.
I gave you Leslie Dwyer's address.
Ask her.
Well, she's disappeared.
- Anything serious? - Maybe.
Delighted to hear it.
Although, why should I care? I was, uh - I was a little sloshed when I told you they were having an affair.
They weren't, really.
It was a romance of the head.
He was besotted with her mind.
- There was nothing physical? - Avery? His idea of passion was a hot diode.
That and autonetics.
Auto- netics.
That was her field.
His was microcircuitry.
I never did quite understand the fine differences.
Have you ever been bored to tears? Yeah, I spent four years in high school, and the hanky never left my hand.
No, I mean really bored to tears.
- Mm-hmm.
- Physically ill, crawling out of your skin, ready to scream with boredom.
Mm-hmm! That's what it was like when the two of them got together with a few drinks in them.
And dumb me, forced to attend.
It was microcircuitry, stress patterns, functional abilities and- Siliconized limb plates, intelligence programming and joint malleability.
All right.
Enough, Carl.
Enough.
What does it all add up to? Autonetics.
Parla inglese, will you, Carl? A robot.
Tony, I believe that this robot is Project RI NG, and I also believe he's developed a mind of his own.
He probably decided enough was enough and decided to split from Tyrell Institute.
Enough of what is enough? You're talking about a glorified adding machine.
What mind? How many times have you heard that by Up at Tyrell, they've just advanced the calendar a few years.
What happens now - besides the fact that I'll be the first newsman shot by a military firing squad? I think that RI NG came for Leslie Dwyer.
Why? I don't know.
And he carted her off someplace.
He killed Avery Walker, I think, and maybe he's killed her too, so I'm gonna try to find out.
And then? Then we'll have the biggest cover-up story since- Don't say it again.
We may not be able to do the story anyway.
What do you mean, we may not be able to do the story? What, more pressure? No, I got a bulletin today.
They may have to restrict the use of our wire.
Who? A political problem in El Salvador may turn into a national emergency.
That means they'll have to use our wire for military messages.
Well, don't you worry about a thing, Tony.
When those El Salvadorian panzer divisions rumble down the streets of our fair city, I'll be right with you, manning the barricades - Carl.
Ready to hurl an epithet- Carl, Carl, Carl- Will you please go, Carl, and leave the jokes to Charlie McCarthy? Please go! Sure.
Well, thank you very much.
Well? Well, there are five branch libraries in the city that carry Books for the Blind.
They call them talking books.
Four of them are no earthly good to us at all, and the fifth had just lent out the following.
"St.
Thomas Aquinas.
'" Uh-huh.
"Moral Man and Immoral Society, '" by Niebhur.
Yeah.
And "Aristotle's Ethics.
'" That's the one! Did you get the name of the borrower? They wouldn't give out information like that.
- Have you got the telephone number of the library? - That's it right there.
Hello.
Braille Library? Yes, I understand that you lent out several ethical philosophy tapes today.
Yes, that's right.
Those are the ones.
When I was a cub reporter in the Windy City, there used to be a big book in the file room that listed phone numbers in numerical order and provided the addresses they corresponded to.
In those days, it was great for finding girls whose numbers you might find, well, somewhere.
That book doesn't exist anymore, but I still have some contacts who can perform the same function for a fee.
In a very short time, I had the address of the girl I was looking for, Dr.
Leslie Dwyer.
She had placed the phone call from a large summer home, north, along the shore of Lake Michigan.
How did you find me? What difference does that make? Look, just get out.
This is a private home.
Yes, but RI NG is a public project built with the hard-earned dollars of the people.
Forget them.
It was built with my hard-earned dollars, and I wanna find out what's going on.
Dr.
Avery Walker was a friend of yours, wasn't he? Wasn't he? Now, his wife doesn't care how he died, but he might have a family or some friends who deserve some few words of explanation.
Look, I, um- I don't know where to begin.
Well, I don't either.
Why don't we start with nomenclature? What is RI NG- R- I-N-G, RI NG- supposed to mean? RI NG comes from Robomatic Internalized Nerve Ganglia.
It was never intended to kill.
RI NG murdered Avery, because RI NG didn't wanna die.
A machine die? No, that doesn't track for me.
When RI NG was conceived, I was to oversee and design his programming.
There was a lot of quibbling up at Tyrell, bickering back and forth over what kind of programming RI NG should have.
With the military there, they had to get their two cents into it.
They wanted aggression put into RI NG's programming.
I opposed it.
So they drummed you out of the corps, hmm? They hardly gave me time to clear out my desk.
Avery was given the job of deactivating RI NG, and unfortunately for Avery, he never really understood how far we'd gotten with RI NG.
We'd given him a survival instinct.
A survival instinct? In a machine? RI NG has sensitivities, likes, dislikes, wants.
He wanted to live, so he killed Avery.
I've been trying to complete his moral and ethical programs.
RI NG himself was hungry for a set of guidelines.
That's why he went for the philosophy tapes.
Good gosh! He won't hurt you.
He won't hurt me? He just went through the door! No, he won't hurt you.
I told you.
He has sensitivities and wants.
Sure, sure.
Turn him around.
Put him in reverse.
Make him stop.
RING, please stop.
- Talk to him.
- Talk to him? Wh-Wh-What about? Ask him a question.
Let him do what he does best.
He made this mask to look human.
You don't need this.
- Talk to him.
- Sure.
Hello, RI NG.
Uh, what time is it? Considering the expense of my development, it would be wasteful to utilize me for simply telling time, especially since I do not wear a watch.
The prudent option would be to consult a rudimentary clock.
Makes sense.
Aha.
What's pi to the 12th? Well, I wouldn't know whether he's right or wrong.
Who's the father of modern psychology? Sigmund Freud is commonly given that appellation, but that is more in terms of classical analysis.
In the study of pure behavior, both Ivan Pavlov and Wilhelm Wundt would have to qualify as well.
You, uh-You said he speaks languages, right? Say it in French.
What's the difference between right and wrong? What is the difference between right and wrong? No philosopher and no tape can answer that question.
Can you? Who had the greater right to life, you or Dr.
Avery Walker? RI NG could've taken your life when you entered this house.
He didn't.
- He waited to find out how you work.
- How I work? Ethically, emotionally, he's still a child.
After all, he's only a few days old.
He needs time to grow.
- He's still ticking.
- RI NG, please cease computation.
RI NG.
Did someone follow you? I haven't the faintest idea.
That's a whole bloomin' army.
Doctor, this is Colonel Wright.
You and Mr.
Kolchak have exactly one minute to come out.
He came to me like a frightened child, with his new face and clothes.
He tried to make himself presentable to me.
He didn't mean to hurt anyone.
He just didn't understand.
Doctor, please cooperate.
RI NG, these are our friends.
They won't hurt us.
Let me talk to 'em.
I've always had a knack with the guys in uniform.
Well, where are the tanks and the howitzers? Isn't there any other way for you guys to handle this? How uptight can you be? Mr.
Kolchak, step aside and keep your mouth shut.
Dr.
Dwyer, please come down here at once and bring the robot with you.
You're gonna upset him.
He considers this his own home.
- Will you wait a minute? - Doctor.
Hands off the press! Move back, and put those stupid guns down.
Come down.
It's all right.
I'm going first.
See? Take her.
No, no! Don't do that! Take him! RI NG, don't! - Well, are you satisfied? - RI NG.
Alpha, beta, gamma, delta.
Leslie, Leslie.
Mama.
Ma-ma.
Hey, wait just one minute, boys.
I don't even know where they took me now.
At least I can't be sure.
Maybe it was Tyrell Institute, but it could just as well have been the Black Hills of South Dakota for all I know.
Was there a drug? Pentothal? Scopolamine? I can't be sure of that either, though there must've been something.
I can't even be sure the events ever happened the way I've told them.
Perhaps when I'm completely back in this world, I'll turn on this tape and not believe any of it myself, but I doubt it.
Because I believe that somewhere, someplace, they or someone else will put some other RI NG together without the help of Leslie Dwyer.
And who- Who will program him then?