Swingtown s01e12 Episode Script
Surprise
previusly on swingtown - who are you? - Janet thompson.
- She's a temp.
- Words per minute? You're hired.
I'm lisa.
you want to go inside? Rick,where are you going? I think you helped us both dodge a bullet.
You were a perfect gentlemen.
Not so perfect.
- Bruce kissed melinda.
- Oh,susan.
I don't think it's anything more than a work crush.
Tom and I are on the list for the new disco downtown.
Shall we all head back for a dip? What would make me happy would be for you to find a good job that makes you happy, then we can go back to exactly the way things used to be.
Don't ever settle,okay? Sure,dad.
Roger,what are you doing here? oh,babe,you shouldn't have.
It's for janet.
Tonit's her birthday dinner.
Didn't we just do one of those last year? Pretty much every year for the last,oh,decade.
It's a tradition.
I was kind of hoping a new house meant a new tradition.
Ought to be a barrel of laughs sitting across from roger all night.
What do you mean? Ever since roger's been laid off,he's been kind of a sad sack.
Never know what to say to the guy now that we can't talk shop.
You have plenty to talk about: Bowling,the white sox.
I'm a cubs fan,honey.
You should probably know that by now.
Oh,ricky! Thank you.
It looks it looks delicious.
Piece of cake.
Pancake,to be exact.
Unfortunately,I'll have to wrap up this little work of art.
It'd take me over an hour to eat it all.
It's your birt ay.
Shouldn't they give you a day off or something? Ah-ah-ah- don't worry about the mess.
- I got it.
- Thank you.
Might be a few weeks before i can buy you a proper present.
Just land this new job today.
That'll be present enough for me.
what new job? Falstaff properties.
It's a commercial real estate firm.
They build skyscrapers and stuff.
What do they need an insurance salesman for? What they need is a safety assessor for a new multimillion-dollar project.
Cool.
Ricky,go make your bed,please.
Thank you.
Honey,how did you get this interview? Larry freed set it up.
He's a foreman at one of falstaff's high-rises downtown.
Oh,larry from your bowling team? Thinks I'd be a good fit for the company, with my background in risk management and my engineering training.
Roger,I hope you get this job.
I really do.
But if you don'T I think it's time to start pursuing work that's a little more realistic.
It's been over a month.
I know how long it's been.
not sure I'll make it home before dinner at susan'S.
Meet you there? Honey,good luck today.
Hope you knock their socks off.
Happy birthday.
Oh,uh,don't forget to set those bottles out.
The milk man will be here any minute.
hey,there.
Morning,sunshine.
Is it morning already? Anything you can do about that? One too many last night? Guess so.
I'll put on some coffee.
coming.
Susan.
You're all dressed up.
Yeah,I got a job interview.
Kind of a dream job,actually.
Oh!Great! Come on in.
I was hoping to catch janet before she left.
You just missed her.
it's good to see you.
I wanted to call after,but roger,I've been thinking.
Me,too.
you know,with everything that happened this summer- us moving,and you losing your job,and everything else- I don't blame you for the kiss.
You were confused.
We-we both were.
I wasn't confused.
- roger - susan,I knew exactly what I was doing.
I- I think we shouldn't see each other for a little while.
Okay.
What about tonight? Oh,I don't know.
It's going to be horrible.
The four of us chitchatting over janet's birthday cake.
Maybe we should invite other people.
You know,make it more of a party.
I guess that could be okay.
Janet gets the birthday she deserves,and after that, we won't see each other at all if that's what you want.
Is that what you want? Yes.
Proudly Presents Swingtown Season 1 Episode 12 susan, I.
Anthony,michelle,this is our neighbor susan.
- Hello.
- hi Thanks again,tom.
It was unforgettable,as always.
Tell trin,some 7-up and tabasco always works for me.
- Nice to meet you.
- See you,tom.
Trina's not feeling well? Just a little hangover.
I'm gonna run out and get her a bottle of alka-seltzer.
She's out by the pool.
oh,susan.
Tom let me in as he was,uh,letting your guests out.
Are you all right?He said you weren't feeling well.
Oh,I always feel better after a swim.
So,it's janet's birthday,and I'm throwing her a surprise party tonight.
Trina,I could use some help.
Sure,sure.
Let me just put something on,and I'll help you set up.
- It's not that.
- What is it? Roger kissed me.
We kissed each other,actually.
It-it didn't go any further than that.
- It never will.
- Are you sure? Yes.
Oh,god,what is wrong with me? He's my best friend's husband.
That doesn't mean you still can't have feelings for M.
Of course it does.
You know,I'm not like you.
I don't have a switch I can just turn on and off every time somebody new strolls into my bedroom.
Well,I'd like to think I'm a little more complex than that.
Oh,I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it like that.
If anything,I wish I were more like you.
It would make this whole mess a lot easier to deal with.
think about what we said,all right? Thank you.
- Okay? - Thanks very much for lunch,gentleman.
- Oh,sure.
- You boys certainly know how to court a lady.
You've given me a lot to think about.
- You know how to reach us.
- Bye,now.
Tell me you're not getting into bed with those bozos at singer-ross.
Not really your business who I get into bed with,is it? And by the way,didn't susan forbid you to speak to me? I will decide who I speak to.
Tough talk there,bruce.
At least I can still talk the talk,right? No comment.
No,seriously.
You you thinking of jumping ship to singer? It's called the options exchange,bruce.
Just keeping mine open.
Breaker one-nine.
you got your ears on,lady killer? - Come back.
- Affirmative,silver bullet.
Got two little honeys knock-knocking at your door in five,four,three 10-4,lady killer.
Silver bullet,over.
Hey,sam.
Lisa.
Silver bullet? It's my handle.
Rick's "lady killer"? Guess we barely escaped with our lives the other night,sam.
And our dignity.
Which is more than I can say for a certain lady killer.
Very funny,goldilocks.
Goldilocks? So those are real cbs? Rick knows this kid whose dad runs a radio shack.
We've already royally P.
O.
'D half a dozen truckers.
How far do they reach? You want to test them out?See how far? Sure.
Goldilocks,you take silver bullet,and I'll roll the dice with the lady killer.
all right- volleyball.
Frisbee new york review of books.
Dumb jock.
You're lucky you're cute.
Stephens! We're waiting on you.
Who do we have here? Speaking of dumb jocks,laurie,this is matt.
So you're the pretty little thing who hijacked spike for the summer.
Spike? It's a volleyball thing.
You play,laurie? Uh,sure.
Well,come on,then.
There's room on my team.
I thought you were a klutz.
Only mostly.
Grab me a coke? All I have is yoo-hoo.
I love you,too.
What'd you say? What did you say? All I have is yoo-hoo.
I thought never mind.
Stephens! Serve's up.
Let's go! All right.
I don't care what he says.
For men,there are only two kinds of girls: The kind you have fun with and the kind you marry.
But bill and I are engaged.
For two years? Have you ever heard the phrase: "Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?" All right,ladies.
Less chitchat,more tap-tap.
Lunch ended five minutes ago.
Might be time to close the dairy,sherry.
what is it,henry? You're really something.
Telling everyone how to run their lives.
I do not tell everyone how to run their lives- most people value my opinion.
And the others need my help,whether they know it or not.
I don't suppose you've heard any of the scuttlebutt about the paper's dear trudy" and her recent " "summer sabbatical?" I may have heard a whisper or two.
I hear the editor is taking submissions to find her replacement while she dries out.
I think you should apply.
Henry,that is very sweet,but I am not an advice columnist.
I am a wife and mother.
Exactly.
You spend your whole life tending to other people's needs.
When you put it like that here,a sample question: Dear trudy:" Every week I watch my neighbor's husband wax his corvette,and he's driving me wild.
" I'd like to polish his hot rod myself.
"Help!Signed,covetous in kenosha.
" Sounds like covetous missed sunday school the day they covered the ten commandments.
Oh,let me see that.
Well,after 12 years of selling insurance, I certainly know a thing or two about risk.
But not quite as much about engineering.
I know how the two are related.
I won't let you down,mr.
Sullivan.
I'm your guy.
Roger,I've taken my share of risks over the years,and I'm inclined to take one on you.
Congratulations.
When can you start? How's tomorrow sound? Well,I like your enthusiasm.
You'll need time to pack up,sell your house,and find a new place.
A new place? Don't worry,we've got a realtor who handles all of our relocations.
And there are some great deals to be had in cincinnati.
Great town.
Hell of a place to raise a family.
two push-ups.
Silver bullet and goldilocks,over.
- You read me? - Loud and clear,silver bullet.
What's your 20,over? Still at the house.
- You at yours? - Negatory,amigo.
At the beach with kissing cousin.
Over and out.
Thanks.
I kinda owed you,after what happened last week.
Thanks for being cool and not telling anyone about it.
You didn't tell anyone about it did you? No.
but,anyway,about that night listen,rick's mic is still on.
Guys don't usually bolt when I take off my top.
It wasn't you.
I mean,you're amazing.
Maybe even too amazing,if that's possible.
I guess I just kinda panicked.
- I knew it!He's scared of girls! - Turn it off.
Are you kidding me?I wouldn't miss this for the world.
How'd you get to be so much cooler than your cousin? I don't get why bj's so freakin' in love with her.
- He's in love with her? - Samantha,give it here.
- no.
- I think they're in love With each other.
Bummer for them.
Keep a secret? Sam's coming to live with us in naperville next week.
She's moving away?For real? My aunt gail's such a mess that my mom's gonna try and get legal custody.
Just wait there game point! Suck on that,spike! Wait,no,no.
Where's everyone going? Come on,I demand a rematch! Laurie,back me up here.
Sorry.
I think I'm gonna have to sit this one out,spike.
I like this girl,stephens.
Busting your undefeated volleyball record and the milk carton theory,in one fell swoop.
- The "milk carton theory"? - Okay,matt I'm paying her a compliment.
Most girls this guy dates don't last longer than a carton of milk; I mean hardly any make it past the one-month mark.
So,this guy must really like you,laurie.
Either that or we're about to expire.
There you are.
I'm off to dr.
Fraiberg'S.
For a hangover? Just my regular checkup.
How was susan this morning? She seemed a little uneasy,running into anthony and michelle.
I'm afraid susan and bruce have more to worry about than whether or not we're going steady with them.
Because of bruce and that girl from his office,melinda? Because of susan.
And roger.
You're kidding.
So far nothing's happened between them.
Well,nothing much.
- How much? - A kiss.
Between those two? A kiss is something.
- I feel responsible.
- For what? If they hadn't met us; started experimenting maybe it was more than they could handle.
I feel like bad parents.
Babe,we're not their parents.
But we are their friends.
And they can use our help.
Dear "wondering in winnetka," stop wondering: He's cheating on you.
God gave you two eyes; open them.
God gave you two legs; walk away.
Yes,it is that simple.
Oughta be,anyway.
Come on,let's go drop these with the editor.
I don't know,uh,maybe I should sleep on it.
What are you talking about? Your responses are brilliant and witty,just like you.
Roger will find work soon.
I- I might not need this job for much longer.
Need and want are two different things.
I'll buy you a drink; and we'll talk it over.
That's very nice of you,but I'm due at my friend susan's for dinner.
So you'll be a little late.
More than a little now.
I think she's planning something special,because it'S well,um it's my birthday.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
Thank you for your encouragement.
That was the most wonderful birthday gift.
Nonsense,you're the one with the gift.
Henry,do you have plans tonight? What did you have in mind? Saw you double down with a covered call on standard.
Surprising,you're usually such a risk-taker.
Gdp numbers made the market jumpy.
So I hedged my bets; played it safe.
Been playing it safe a lot lately.
Kind of takes the fun out of it,don't you think? Maybe a little.
You-you know,I gotta admit, it's-it's really nice talking to a woman who understands the market.
What do you and susan talk about? When it's just the two of you? I don't know.
Um,our kids.
Lots of things.
Uh,this morning,we-we talked about baseball briefly.
My god,did you see jose cardenal against the giants yesterday? Six for seven in 14 innings.
A double,a homer and four rbis.
Melinda don't do this.
Don't do what? We're just talking about the cubs.
Don't leave lehman-pierce.
I heard singer-ross made you an offer.
You want to talk me out of it? Take me to dinner tonight.
I can'T.
I-I've got a thing at home.
You remember my first week at lehman-pierce, when you taught me about windows of opportunity? Tonight,your window is open.
Tomorrow? I'm not so sure.
susan,I'm sorry I'm so late.
The interview went longer than I expected.
It's fine.
Janet's not here yet.
long interview?Must mean it went well.
It went great.
I got the job.
Oh,that's fantastic.
There's a catch.
She's coming.
She's here.
What's the catch? The job's in cincinnati.
Surprise! Happy birthday! so this is what you two have been up to,spending all this time together.
Happy birthday.
I am terrible- arriving late to my own surprise party.
- Better than early,huh? - Well,that's true.
Oh,I'm sorry,uh,this is henry fisher.
We work together at the daily sun.
Uh,this is my best friend susan.
And my husband roger.
It's my fault we're late- I forced her to stay at the office.
Hardly- you were doing me a favor.
Well,and don't think that I won't expect you to return it once you're a famous advice columnist.
Advice columnist? With any luck,you're looking at the new "dear trudy.
" What happened to the old one? A little problem with the bottle.
Yeah,her husband caught her drinking vanilla extract again.
Talk about living in glass houses.
Oh,oh,speaking of houses- how did your interview go at the construction company? - It went well.
- Good! My fingers are crossed.
Oh,no! Susan,you didn'T you made pigs-in-a-pickle? Thank you!Henry,wait until you try these.
Susan,thank you.
What's going on?What is all this? Uh,change of plans.
I- I called your office,but they said you'd already left.
Surprise.
- Susan,is there any more ice? - Okay.
She was gonna find out sooner or later.
I didn't mean for her to hear,I swear.
I must have been sitting on the mic.
Well,she did hear you.
What is the big deal? We're going to high school in two weeks.
You'll bag plenty of new chicks.
You really don't get it,do you? Sure,I do.
You thought you were gonna nail sam, and you're pissed you wasted your whole summer.
You don't know a thing about girls.
Like you do? Guy gets to first base,thinks he's leif garrett.
Well,at least I didn't bolt when sam took her top off.
Yeah,we heard that part,too pour me one of those? You got it.
You sure were busy today.
Who are all these people? everybody I could find in janet's address book.
I thought you'd prefer it to dinner with the thompsons.
Well,I'm not so sure.
Kind of feel like a stranger in my own home.
Know what you mean.
Jose cardenal.
You know who that is? Why,is he here? no.
Never mind.
They don't look so good.
I take him,you take her? susan,when was the last time you were on an airplane? uh,last year.
We-we went to visit bruce's sister in philadelphia.
Do you remember what they tell you at the beginning of the flight about the oxygen masks? No,you got me.
If you're traveling with a child or someone that needs assistance, you're supposed to secure your mask first, because if you can't breathe,you're no good to anyone else.
I'm not sure I understand.
Just just just breathe.
Take care of yourself first.
you having fun? ask me after a few more of these.
you okay? Sure,yeah,I'm okay.
Susan's okay.
We're all okay.
Want to talk about it? I had plans,you know? Lots of them.
Five-year plan,ten.
Wife,kids,job,house.
And a better job better house.
Perspective's a choice.
Oh,you want perspective? You try having kids,being the breadwinner, having people depend on you I mean,for everything.
- I'm sorry - no,no,I am trying.
I am doing the best I can.
I mean,you're lucky.
Everything is so effortless with you and tom.
God forbid life should throw you a real curve one of these days.
a little early for cake.
This party was a mistake.
I think you were right.
Maybe we shouldn't see each other for a while.
Shouldn't be a problem with you in cincinnati.
I didn't say yes.
Before I make this decision I need to know how you feel.
I feel I feel that you should discuss this with janet.
Susan please? I need to know how you feel about me.
If I'm alone in this,just say so.
I'll take the job,be out of your life.
I don't know,roger,I ow,roger,I you okay? I'm fine.
I'm falling in lovewith you,susan.
Roger I can'T.
If you're gonna dump me,just get it over with.
What? The "milk carton theory.
" No,don't listen to what matt says.
He's a blockhead.
It's not just what matt said.
It'S what you didn't say.
I know you heard me tell you that I love you in the parking lot today.
It's fine.
I don't want you to say anything you don't mean.
That isn't it.
Laurie you start school in two weeks.
I still don't know whether I'm gonna take the faculty job at lakeview.
I don't want us to get ahead of ourselves.
I'm not getting ahead of myself.
I know exactly where I am.
When you figure out where you are,let me know.
How'd it go with susan? Oh,I did my best.
I think my talents might lie more in the realm of physical therapy.
- how's bruce? - Confused.
Tom,there's something I want to tell you.
Oh,hey,watch yourself there,kiddo.
Hey,you watch yourself.
Had a few too many tonight,sailor? I'm not a sailor,I am a freshman.
- Come on - no.
What is going on,ricky? Junior's,uh,been hitting the hard stuff.
Maybe you're next,bud.
Watch your mouth,ricky.
Oh,hey,hey,hey,take it easy.
He's just a kid.
Yeah,he's my kid,I'll handle it.
No,I will do it.
You're coming with me,young man.
I'm so sorry.
Just a sec.
Hello? Hey,I was hoping you'd still be there.
Bruce.
What do you want? I'll tell you what i don't want- I don't want you to leave lehman-pierce.
I I don't want you to leave because I can't stand the thought of not seeing you every day.
Little late for sweet talk,isn't it? Too late? Is the window still open? Just come down here.
I'm on my way.
richard dean thompson,I hope you are proud of yourself.
What is the matter with you,for god's sake? Start talking,or you are grounded until college.
You know that stupid girl that lives next door? Bj's in love with her.
That's what this is all about? You think I'm an idiot,too? Oh,honey.
No,of course not.
You and bj you have a history,just like susan and I do.
You're best friends- this girl can't take that away from you.
She already has.
You know,you and i are a lot alike.
Oh,great,I feel much better.
No.
I mean,we cover things up.
Our feelings.
Remember when we played that game,um,whac-a-mole,at great america? Well,feelings are like that.
Push one down,it just pops back up somewhere else.
It makes it harder for people to get where we're coming from.
I guess.
If you want to keep bj's friendship,do something about it.
I'm sorry for ruining your party.
Apology accepted.
Now I want you to go upstairs and lie down.
And I don't ever want you drinking like this again,got it? Thanks,mom.
wish I had a mother like you.
I I doubt that.
No,really.
How do you do it? Oh,you just do.
You just love them.
You want to spare them everything,take every bullet,but but how can they learn if you don't let them make their own mistakes? Exactly.
I'm pregnant.
You're pre Oh,that's wonderful news! That tr oh,trina.
No it is,uh,tom's,isn't it?definitely.
I did the math,it seems we closed our marriage at just the right time.
I haven't told him yet.
Why not? Well,we didn't exactly plan.
I mean,it's a bit of a surprise.
I love surprises.
Forgot how much till tonight.
I bet tom does,too.
Susan? Uh,I'm sorry.
I've-I've got to go back to the office.
At this hour? I left my briefcase.
It's got all of today's receipts.
I may stay down there a while.
Just you know,catch up on some paperwork.
Sure.
There you are.
Yep.
Here I am.
Look,I think you're amazing So,you are breaking up with me.
Remember what I said about not getting ahead of ourselves? Sorry.
If I take the job at lakeview,then you and i would have to hide from the school board,from the teachers,students.
I don't want to hide what we have,laurie.
I'm turning down the position.
You could've just said,"I love you.
" You know? I thought I just did.
It was a pleasure to meet you.
Thanks.
You,too.
Henry.
Wait.
you're right.
I can do this "dear trudy" thing.
I- I want to submit my column.
Good.
And happy birthday,janet.
good night.
Tell bruce good night.
We couldn't find him anywhere.
He,uh had to go back to the office.
we're across the street if you need us.
Is it true,what lisa said? I'm leaving next week.
Is it true what rick said? It's true.
Guy's got it bad.
You're all bj talks about.
Get lost,rick.
I brought this for sam.
So you guys can talk.
It should reach naperville,no problem.
Is lisa around? Up in my room.
I don't want to go.
I don't want you to go,either.
so,you think we closed pandora's box? Not even an inch.
I guess we really do have to let them make their own mistakes.
You're becoming quite the little den mother,looking out for her cubs.
It makes me wonder,you know? What'd it be like,being a mother for real.
you almost had me there.
Certainly made a mess of things tonight.
I want you to take the job in cincinnati.
It's the best thing for everyone.
Is it? Don't we deserve a chance? Well,ricky's in the car,but he will be over tomorrow morning, mop in hand to swab the decks.
He wants to act like a drunken sailor,he can work like one too.
It's fine,janet.
It's my mess.
I'll I'll clean it up.
Okay.
Thank you.
I loved my party.
Happy birthday.
Well,roger,all good things must come to an end.
She's right.
Good-bye.
Proudly Presents
- She's a temp.
- Words per minute? You're hired.
I'm lisa.
you want to go inside? Rick,where are you going? I think you helped us both dodge a bullet.
You were a perfect gentlemen.
Not so perfect.
- Bruce kissed melinda.
- Oh,susan.
I don't think it's anything more than a work crush.
Tom and I are on the list for the new disco downtown.
Shall we all head back for a dip? What would make me happy would be for you to find a good job that makes you happy, then we can go back to exactly the way things used to be.
Don't ever settle,okay? Sure,dad.
Roger,what are you doing here? oh,babe,you shouldn't have.
It's for janet.
Tonit's her birthday dinner.
Didn't we just do one of those last year? Pretty much every year for the last,oh,decade.
It's a tradition.
I was kind of hoping a new house meant a new tradition.
Ought to be a barrel of laughs sitting across from roger all night.
What do you mean? Ever since roger's been laid off,he's been kind of a sad sack.
Never know what to say to the guy now that we can't talk shop.
You have plenty to talk about: Bowling,the white sox.
I'm a cubs fan,honey.
You should probably know that by now.
Oh,ricky! Thank you.
It looks it looks delicious.
Piece of cake.
Pancake,to be exact.
Unfortunately,I'll have to wrap up this little work of art.
It'd take me over an hour to eat it all.
It's your birt ay.
Shouldn't they give you a day off or something? Ah-ah-ah- don't worry about the mess.
- I got it.
- Thank you.
Might be a few weeks before i can buy you a proper present.
Just land this new job today.
That'll be present enough for me.
what new job? Falstaff properties.
It's a commercial real estate firm.
They build skyscrapers and stuff.
What do they need an insurance salesman for? What they need is a safety assessor for a new multimillion-dollar project.
Cool.
Ricky,go make your bed,please.
Thank you.
Honey,how did you get this interview? Larry freed set it up.
He's a foreman at one of falstaff's high-rises downtown.
Oh,larry from your bowling team? Thinks I'd be a good fit for the company, with my background in risk management and my engineering training.
Roger,I hope you get this job.
I really do.
But if you don'T I think it's time to start pursuing work that's a little more realistic.
It's been over a month.
I know how long it's been.
not sure I'll make it home before dinner at susan'S.
Meet you there? Honey,good luck today.
Hope you knock their socks off.
Happy birthday.
Oh,uh,don't forget to set those bottles out.
The milk man will be here any minute.
hey,there.
Morning,sunshine.
Is it morning already? Anything you can do about that? One too many last night? Guess so.
I'll put on some coffee.
coming.
Susan.
You're all dressed up.
Yeah,I got a job interview.
Kind of a dream job,actually.
Oh!Great! Come on in.
I was hoping to catch janet before she left.
You just missed her.
it's good to see you.
I wanted to call after,but roger,I've been thinking.
Me,too.
you know,with everything that happened this summer- us moving,and you losing your job,and everything else- I don't blame you for the kiss.
You were confused.
We-we both were.
I wasn't confused.
- roger - susan,I knew exactly what I was doing.
I- I think we shouldn't see each other for a little while.
Okay.
What about tonight? Oh,I don't know.
It's going to be horrible.
The four of us chitchatting over janet's birthday cake.
Maybe we should invite other people.
You know,make it more of a party.
I guess that could be okay.
Janet gets the birthday she deserves,and after that, we won't see each other at all if that's what you want.
Is that what you want? Yes.
Proudly Presents Swingtown Season 1 Episode 12 susan, I.
Anthony,michelle,this is our neighbor susan.
- Hello.
- hi Thanks again,tom.
It was unforgettable,as always.
Tell trin,some 7-up and tabasco always works for me.
- Nice to meet you.
- See you,tom.
Trina's not feeling well? Just a little hangover.
I'm gonna run out and get her a bottle of alka-seltzer.
She's out by the pool.
oh,susan.
Tom let me in as he was,uh,letting your guests out.
Are you all right?He said you weren't feeling well.
Oh,I always feel better after a swim.
So,it's janet's birthday,and I'm throwing her a surprise party tonight.
Trina,I could use some help.
Sure,sure.
Let me just put something on,and I'll help you set up.
- It's not that.
- What is it? Roger kissed me.
We kissed each other,actually.
It-it didn't go any further than that.
- It never will.
- Are you sure? Yes.
Oh,god,what is wrong with me? He's my best friend's husband.
That doesn't mean you still can't have feelings for M.
Of course it does.
You know,I'm not like you.
I don't have a switch I can just turn on and off every time somebody new strolls into my bedroom.
Well,I'd like to think I'm a little more complex than that.
Oh,I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it like that.
If anything,I wish I were more like you.
It would make this whole mess a lot easier to deal with.
think about what we said,all right? Thank you.
- Okay? - Thanks very much for lunch,gentleman.
- Oh,sure.
- You boys certainly know how to court a lady.
You've given me a lot to think about.
- You know how to reach us.
- Bye,now.
Tell me you're not getting into bed with those bozos at singer-ross.
Not really your business who I get into bed with,is it? And by the way,didn't susan forbid you to speak to me? I will decide who I speak to.
Tough talk there,bruce.
At least I can still talk the talk,right? No comment.
No,seriously.
You you thinking of jumping ship to singer? It's called the options exchange,bruce.
Just keeping mine open.
Breaker one-nine.
you got your ears on,lady killer? - Come back.
- Affirmative,silver bullet.
Got two little honeys knock-knocking at your door in five,four,three 10-4,lady killer.
Silver bullet,over.
Hey,sam.
Lisa.
Silver bullet? It's my handle.
Rick's "lady killer"? Guess we barely escaped with our lives the other night,sam.
And our dignity.
Which is more than I can say for a certain lady killer.
Very funny,goldilocks.
Goldilocks? So those are real cbs? Rick knows this kid whose dad runs a radio shack.
We've already royally P.
O.
'D half a dozen truckers.
How far do they reach? You want to test them out?See how far? Sure.
Goldilocks,you take silver bullet,and I'll roll the dice with the lady killer.
all right- volleyball.
Frisbee new york review of books.
Dumb jock.
You're lucky you're cute.
Stephens! We're waiting on you.
Who do we have here? Speaking of dumb jocks,laurie,this is matt.
So you're the pretty little thing who hijacked spike for the summer.
Spike? It's a volleyball thing.
You play,laurie? Uh,sure.
Well,come on,then.
There's room on my team.
I thought you were a klutz.
Only mostly.
Grab me a coke? All I have is yoo-hoo.
I love you,too.
What'd you say? What did you say? All I have is yoo-hoo.
I thought never mind.
Stephens! Serve's up.
Let's go! All right.
I don't care what he says.
For men,there are only two kinds of girls: The kind you have fun with and the kind you marry.
But bill and I are engaged.
For two years? Have you ever heard the phrase: "Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?" All right,ladies.
Less chitchat,more tap-tap.
Lunch ended five minutes ago.
Might be time to close the dairy,sherry.
what is it,henry? You're really something.
Telling everyone how to run their lives.
I do not tell everyone how to run their lives- most people value my opinion.
And the others need my help,whether they know it or not.
I don't suppose you've heard any of the scuttlebutt about the paper's dear trudy" and her recent " "summer sabbatical?" I may have heard a whisper or two.
I hear the editor is taking submissions to find her replacement while she dries out.
I think you should apply.
Henry,that is very sweet,but I am not an advice columnist.
I am a wife and mother.
Exactly.
You spend your whole life tending to other people's needs.
When you put it like that here,a sample question: Dear trudy:" Every week I watch my neighbor's husband wax his corvette,and he's driving me wild.
" I'd like to polish his hot rod myself.
"Help!Signed,covetous in kenosha.
" Sounds like covetous missed sunday school the day they covered the ten commandments.
Oh,let me see that.
Well,after 12 years of selling insurance, I certainly know a thing or two about risk.
But not quite as much about engineering.
I know how the two are related.
I won't let you down,mr.
Sullivan.
I'm your guy.
Roger,I've taken my share of risks over the years,and I'm inclined to take one on you.
Congratulations.
When can you start? How's tomorrow sound? Well,I like your enthusiasm.
You'll need time to pack up,sell your house,and find a new place.
A new place? Don't worry,we've got a realtor who handles all of our relocations.
And there are some great deals to be had in cincinnati.
Great town.
Hell of a place to raise a family.
two push-ups.
Silver bullet and goldilocks,over.
- You read me? - Loud and clear,silver bullet.
What's your 20,over? Still at the house.
- You at yours? - Negatory,amigo.
At the beach with kissing cousin.
Over and out.
Thanks.
I kinda owed you,after what happened last week.
Thanks for being cool and not telling anyone about it.
You didn't tell anyone about it did you? No.
but,anyway,about that night listen,rick's mic is still on.
Guys don't usually bolt when I take off my top.
It wasn't you.
I mean,you're amazing.
Maybe even too amazing,if that's possible.
I guess I just kinda panicked.
- I knew it!He's scared of girls! - Turn it off.
Are you kidding me?I wouldn't miss this for the world.
How'd you get to be so much cooler than your cousin? I don't get why bj's so freakin' in love with her.
- He's in love with her? - Samantha,give it here.
- no.
- I think they're in love With each other.
Bummer for them.
Keep a secret? Sam's coming to live with us in naperville next week.
She's moving away?For real? My aunt gail's such a mess that my mom's gonna try and get legal custody.
Just wait there game point! Suck on that,spike! Wait,no,no.
Where's everyone going? Come on,I demand a rematch! Laurie,back me up here.
Sorry.
I think I'm gonna have to sit this one out,spike.
I like this girl,stephens.
Busting your undefeated volleyball record and the milk carton theory,in one fell swoop.
- The "milk carton theory"? - Okay,matt I'm paying her a compliment.
Most girls this guy dates don't last longer than a carton of milk; I mean hardly any make it past the one-month mark.
So,this guy must really like you,laurie.
Either that or we're about to expire.
There you are.
I'm off to dr.
Fraiberg'S.
For a hangover? Just my regular checkup.
How was susan this morning? She seemed a little uneasy,running into anthony and michelle.
I'm afraid susan and bruce have more to worry about than whether or not we're going steady with them.
Because of bruce and that girl from his office,melinda? Because of susan.
And roger.
You're kidding.
So far nothing's happened between them.
Well,nothing much.
- How much? - A kiss.
Between those two? A kiss is something.
- I feel responsible.
- For what? If they hadn't met us; started experimenting maybe it was more than they could handle.
I feel like bad parents.
Babe,we're not their parents.
But we are their friends.
And they can use our help.
Dear "wondering in winnetka," stop wondering: He's cheating on you.
God gave you two eyes; open them.
God gave you two legs; walk away.
Yes,it is that simple.
Oughta be,anyway.
Come on,let's go drop these with the editor.
I don't know,uh,maybe I should sleep on it.
What are you talking about? Your responses are brilliant and witty,just like you.
Roger will find work soon.
I- I might not need this job for much longer.
Need and want are two different things.
I'll buy you a drink; and we'll talk it over.
That's very nice of you,but I'm due at my friend susan's for dinner.
So you'll be a little late.
More than a little now.
I think she's planning something special,because it'S well,um it's my birthday.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
Thank you for your encouragement.
That was the most wonderful birthday gift.
Nonsense,you're the one with the gift.
Henry,do you have plans tonight? What did you have in mind? Saw you double down with a covered call on standard.
Surprising,you're usually such a risk-taker.
Gdp numbers made the market jumpy.
So I hedged my bets; played it safe.
Been playing it safe a lot lately.
Kind of takes the fun out of it,don't you think? Maybe a little.
You-you know,I gotta admit, it's-it's really nice talking to a woman who understands the market.
What do you and susan talk about? When it's just the two of you? I don't know.
Um,our kids.
Lots of things.
Uh,this morning,we-we talked about baseball briefly.
My god,did you see jose cardenal against the giants yesterday? Six for seven in 14 innings.
A double,a homer and four rbis.
Melinda don't do this.
Don't do what? We're just talking about the cubs.
Don't leave lehman-pierce.
I heard singer-ross made you an offer.
You want to talk me out of it? Take me to dinner tonight.
I can'T.
I-I've got a thing at home.
You remember my first week at lehman-pierce, when you taught me about windows of opportunity? Tonight,your window is open.
Tomorrow? I'm not so sure.
susan,I'm sorry I'm so late.
The interview went longer than I expected.
It's fine.
Janet's not here yet.
long interview?Must mean it went well.
It went great.
I got the job.
Oh,that's fantastic.
There's a catch.
She's coming.
She's here.
What's the catch? The job's in cincinnati.
Surprise! Happy birthday! so this is what you two have been up to,spending all this time together.
Happy birthday.
I am terrible- arriving late to my own surprise party.
- Better than early,huh? - Well,that's true.
Oh,I'm sorry,uh,this is henry fisher.
We work together at the daily sun.
Uh,this is my best friend susan.
And my husband roger.
It's my fault we're late- I forced her to stay at the office.
Hardly- you were doing me a favor.
Well,and don't think that I won't expect you to return it once you're a famous advice columnist.
Advice columnist? With any luck,you're looking at the new "dear trudy.
" What happened to the old one? A little problem with the bottle.
Yeah,her husband caught her drinking vanilla extract again.
Talk about living in glass houses.
Oh,oh,speaking of houses- how did your interview go at the construction company? - It went well.
- Good! My fingers are crossed.
Oh,no! Susan,you didn'T you made pigs-in-a-pickle? Thank you!Henry,wait until you try these.
Susan,thank you.
What's going on?What is all this? Uh,change of plans.
I- I called your office,but they said you'd already left.
Surprise.
- Susan,is there any more ice? - Okay.
She was gonna find out sooner or later.
I didn't mean for her to hear,I swear.
I must have been sitting on the mic.
Well,she did hear you.
What is the big deal? We're going to high school in two weeks.
You'll bag plenty of new chicks.
You really don't get it,do you? Sure,I do.
You thought you were gonna nail sam, and you're pissed you wasted your whole summer.
You don't know a thing about girls.
Like you do? Guy gets to first base,thinks he's leif garrett.
Well,at least I didn't bolt when sam took her top off.
Yeah,we heard that part,too pour me one of those? You got it.
You sure were busy today.
Who are all these people? everybody I could find in janet's address book.
I thought you'd prefer it to dinner with the thompsons.
Well,I'm not so sure.
Kind of feel like a stranger in my own home.
Know what you mean.
Jose cardenal.
You know who that is? Why,is he here? no.
Never mind.
They don't look so good.
I take him,you take her? susan,when was the last time you were on an airplane? uh,last year.
We-we went to visit bruce's sister in philadelphia.
Do you remember what they tell you at the beginning of the flight about the oxygen masks? No,you got me.
If you're traveling with a child or someone that needs assistance, you're supposed to secure your mask first, because if you can't breathe,you're no good to anyone else.
I'm not sure I understand.
Just just just breathe.
Take care of yourself first.
you having fun? ask me after a few more of these.
you okay? Sure,yeah,I'm okay.
Susan's okay.
We're all okay.
Want to talk about it? I had plans,you know? Lots of them.
Five-year plan,ten.
Wife,kids,job,house.
And a better job better house.
Perspective's a choice.
Oh,you want perspective? You try having kids,being the breadwinner, having people depend on you I mean,for everything.
- I'm sorry - no,no,I am trying.
I am doing the best I can.
I mean,you're lucky.
Everything is so effortless with you and tom.
God forbid life should throw you a real curve one of these days.
a little early for cake.
This party was a mistake.
I think you were right.
Maybe we shouldn't see each other for a while.
Shouldn't be a problem with you in cincinnati.
I didn't say yes.
Before I make this decision I need to know how you feel.
I feel I feel that you should discuss this with janet.
Susan please? I need to know how you feel about me.
If I'm alone in this,just say so.
I'll take the job,be out of your life.
I don't know,roger,I ow,roger,I you okay? I'm fine.
I'm falling in lovewith you,susan.
Roger I can'T.
If you're gonna dump me,just get it over with.
What? The "milk carton theory.
" No,don't listen to what matt says.
He's a blockhead.
It's not just what matt said.
It'S what you didn't say.
I know you heard me tell you that I love you in the parking lot today.
It's fine.
I don't want you to say anything you don't mean.
That isn't it.
Laurie you start school in two weeks.
I still don't know whether I'm gonna take the faculty job at lakeview.
I don't want us to get ahead of ourselves.
I'm not getting ahead of myself.
I know exactly where I am.
When you figure out where you are,let me know.
How'd it go with susan? Oh,I did my best.
I think my talents might lie more in the realm of physical therapy.
- how's bruce? - Confused.
Tom,there's something I want to tell you.
Oh,hey,watch yourself there,kiddo.
Hey,you watch yourself.
Had a few too many tonight,sailor? I'm not a sailor,I am a freshman.
- Come on - no.
What is going on,ricky? Junior's,uh,been hitting the hard stuff.
Maybe you're next,bud.
Watch your mouth,ricky.
Oh,hey,hey,hey,take it easy.
He's just a kid.
Yeah,he's my kid,I'll handle it.
No,I will do it.
You're coming with me,young man.
I'm so sorry.
Just a sec.
Hello? Hey,I was hoping you'd still be there.
Bruce.
What do you want? I'll tell you what i don't want- I don't want you to leave lehman-pierce.
I I don't want you to leave because I can't stand the thought of not seeing you every day.
Little late for sweet talk,isn't it? Too late? Is the window still open? Just come down here.
I'm on my way.
richard dean thompson,I hope you are proud of yourself.
What is the matter with you,for god's sake? Start talking,or you are grounded until college.
You know that stupid girl that lives next door? Bj's in love with her.
That's what this is all about? You think I'm an idiot,too? Oh,honey.
No,of course not.
You and bj you have a history,just like susan and I do.
You're best friends- this girl can't take that away from you.
She already has.
You know,you and i are a lot alike.
Oh,great,I feel much better.
No.
I mean,we cover things up.
Our feelings.
Remember when we played that game,um,whac-a-mole,at great america? Well,feelings are like that.
Push one down,it just pops back up somewhere else.
It makes it harder for people to get where we're coming from.
I guess.
If you want to keep bj's friendship,do something about it.
I'm sorry for ruining your party.
Apology accepted.
Now I want you to go upstairs and lie down.
And I don't ever want you drinking like this again,got it? Thanks,mom.
wish I had a mother like you.
I I doubt that.
No,really.
How do you do it? Oh,you just do.
You just love them.
You want to spare them everything,take every bullet,but but how can they learn if you don't let them make their own mistakes? Exactly.
I'm pregnant.
You're pre Oh,that's wonderful news! That tr oh,trina.
No it is,uh,tom's,isn't it?definitely.
I did the math,it seems we closed our marriage at just the right time.
I haven't told him yet.
Why not? Well,we didn't exactly plan.
I mean,it's a bit of a surprise.
I love surprises.
Forgot how much till tonight.
I bet tom does,too.
Susan? Uh,I'm sorry.
I've-I've got to go back to the office.
At this hour? I left my briefcase.
It's got all of today's receipts.
I may stay down there a while.
Just you know,catch up on some paperwork.
Sure.
There you are.
Yep.
Here I am.
Look,I think you're amazing So,you are breaking up with me.
Remember what I said about not getting ahead of ourselves? Sorry.
If I take the job at lakeview,then you and i would have to hide from the school board,from the teachers,students.
I don't want to hide what we have,laurie.
I'm turning down the position.
You could've just said,"I love you.
" You know? I thought I just did.
It was a pleasure to meet you.
Thanks.
You,too.
Henry.
Wait.
you're right.
I can do this "dear trudy" thing.
I- I want to submit my column.
Good.
And happy birthday,janet.
good night.
Tell bruce good night.
We couldn't find him anywhere.
He,uh had to go back to the office.
we're across the street if you need us.
Is it true,what lisa said? I'm leaving next week.
Is it true what rick said? It's true.
Guy's got it bad.
You're all bj talks about.
Get lost,rick.
I brought this for sam.
So you guys can talk.
It should reach naperville,no problem.
Is lisa around? Up in my room.
I don't want to go.
I don't want you to go,either.
so,you think we closed pandora's box? Not even an inch.
I guess we really do have to let them make their own mistakes.
You're becoming quite the little den mother,looking out for her cubs.
It makes me wonder,you know? What'd it be like,being a mother for real.
you almost had me there.
Certainly made a mess of things tonight.
I want you to take the job in cincinnati.
It's the best thing for everyone.
Is it? Don't we deserve a chance? Well,ricky's in the car,but he will be over tomorrow morning, mop in hand to swab the decks.
He wants to act like a drunken sailor,he can work like one too.
It's fine,janet.
It's my mess.
I'll I'll clean it up.
Okay.
Thank you.
I loved my party.
Happy birthday.
Well,roger,all good things must come to an end.
She's right.
Good-bye.
Proudly Presents