The Grinder (2015) s01e12 Episode Script

Previously on The Grinder I know what this is all about.
I've overstayed my welcome.
Stewart's asked me to move out.
It's a complete 180 at Dad's.
No one's being a raging butthole.
If you ever want to come by our office - and talk - We love to listen.
They want me to practice law for their firm with full in-court speaking privileges.
You want to work for Rozz and Landy, then work for Rozz and Landy.
I'll see you around, brother.
- Okay, Dean.
- 'Cause I no longer live here.
Previously on The Grinder How did you find me? How long are we gonna keep up this charade? I'm never going back.
I suggest your reel in those fishing lines, Counselor.
You pull a gun on me, you better be ready to use it.
It didn't have to be like this.
Who are you kidding?! You wanted me out of that firm! You forced me out! So you can turn around and walk down that beach or you can pull that trigger, 'cause either way, I'm gonna be fine! We were a team.
Mitch, you and me Stutz and Grinder.
There was nothing we couldn't do together and now you're willing to throw it all away.
Over what? A merger and some lousy piece of tail! Grinder! Grinder! No, that's stupid.
Go ahead.
You can shoot me.
Are you man enough to murder all these beautiful peasants? I didn't think so.
- Morning, everyone.
- Good morning.
Should be a pretty easy week, I think.
Let's see, we just have the, um, the Pascal divorce case.
You mean the case you're arguing against your own brother? Dad, I'd hardly say I'm arguing against Dean.
Yeah, he's still not a lawyer.
He just went to not work at another firm.
- This whole thing makes me sick.
- Me, too, Todd.
I'm starting to question what we're even doing here.
Well, Dad, what we're doing is pretty much what we did before Dean got here.
I mean, we were functioning pretty well, remember? I do not.
He made us better.
Well, Todd, we will continue on, uh, being better, then.
To-to make, to make him proud, right? Uh, because, uh because justice is a fragile lady, who needs protection by us under law.
And as guardians of justice Stewart, people are leaving.
I see it, I see it.
Nice try, son.
Mr.
Pascal's prenup.
- It's ironclad.
- We need to find away around it.
Or do we just plow right through it? Wow, the timing of that was impeccable.
Did you see that, Pat? Oh, I saw it.
He came in with the exact opposite of what you were saying At the perfect moment.
Aw, guys, it's just training and some instinct.
Ladies and gentlemen, I am truly honored to officially welcome the newest member of our team.
You know him as TV's The Grinder.
Please give a warm Rozz/Landy welcome to the incomparable Dean Sanderson.
Oh, please, please.
Um, first let me say, uh, how excited I am to be joining this team.
I look forward to not only learning which one of you is Rozz and which one of you is Landy, but to developing a close, personal workplace dynamic with each and every one of you.
Honestly, we didn't bring you here to learn our names.
We know 'em.
But what we don't know is how to grind.
Then you came to the right place.
All right, what do we got? Hugh? What if we told you we found a way to let you, sir, speak in court? Well, then I would ask you, sir, how? What if we told you not to worry about how, - we've got it covered? - Well, then I would say I am worried and would like to know.
Then we would tell you that we found the loophole.
Boom.
Then I would end the conversation by saying, "Get that courtroom ready, because I've got some speaking to do.
" It's like I'm watching the show.
Oh, just goose bumps.
Wow.
Hey, Todd.
Hey.
You okay? I'm just sad.
Yeah, I know.
About Dean.
I got that.
- Leaving.
- Yep.
Look, it's all gonna work out, okay? - You'll be fine.
- Thanks, Claire.
Y-You know what's kind of weird to think about, I guess now that the big man's gone, I guess we're the new office - "will they/won't they," hmm? - The what? You know, that thing you had with Dean? Um, I never had a thing with Dean, and also I will never have a thing with you.
Wow, it's already exactly like you and Dean.
Why does this keep happening? Is it because I'm the only single woman here? So, we're starting with the "won't they.
" That makes sense.
Lizzie, I don't want to hear this stuff! You guys, what is? - Wh? - Ethan! Uh, I-I'll pay for that.
What happened? I don't want to get back into it.
It'll just make me more angry.
Try.
I walked in the door, and then she starts blabbing her dumb poems at me They're not poems, they're musings.
They're garbage! - Whoa.
- Ethan.
Are you feeling okay, buddy? To be honest, no.
I'm a little off.
Uncle Dean used to lead me through meditation every morning to help with my rage.
- "Meditation"? - "Rage"? I might just go upstairs and decompress.
I'll be down in a bit.
You go decompress.
What is he enraged about? Honey, what are these musings? Uncle Dean was really encouraging me to explore my thoughts and express them through prose in my journal.
I didn't even know you were doing that.
Yeah, it sounds like a-a great thing, to-to explore your thoughts Through prose.
Then we talked them through, and I guess it just made me feel less alone.
Oh.
Okay, well I could do that with you, right? - That sounds fun.
- No, it's not fun.
It's actually really serious.
Did you know Dean was doing all that? No.
I didn't.
It's kind of sweet.
I mean, it seems like they really connected with him.
You know, this isn't my fault, honey.
I just asked him what his plan was.
He was the one that blew up and cut off all contact.
I am not saying it's your fault.
I just think the kids really miss him.
Yeah, I know.
Wait a second.
- Do you miss him? - What? You miss Dean living here? - No! - You do! Honey, that's a crazy thing to say.
You No.
No! I think you need to explore your thoughts in a journal, through prose.
I'm I think I'm good on my thoughts.
We're good, me and my thoughts.
Oh, excuse me.
- Stew.
- Dean.
- Hi.
- Hi.
You look good.
Thank you.
Uh, so do you.
Thank you.
New suit? - It is.
- Hmm.
Oh, forgot what a good eye you have.
Thank you for noticing.
Uh, how's Andre? Andre's a survivor, Stew.
I don't know where he is.
And I don't know how he got there.
But I think wherever he is, he's smiling.
Okay, well, long as he's situated.
Okay, Pascal v.
Pascal.
I understand the plaintiff has a mediation list? Yes, Your Honor, our client, Ms.
Georgia Pascal Um I'm sorry.
Objection.
Yes, Mr.
Sanderson? Your Honor, and I I hate to do this, but, uh opposing counsel my brother is not a lawyer.
So, technically, he can't speak in court.
Your Honor, if I may overrule - my brother's objection - You may not.
Let me rephrase that.
While it is true I am not a lawyer, as my opponent has taken great pains to point out today and many other hurtful times over the past four months, he's wrong on one point.
I can speak in court.
- What? - Huh? My new employers, Hugh Rozz and Pat Landy Uh, I'm actually, uh took the time to get me certified, as a certified legal intern.
Which means I can speak in court as long as one of them is present.
And it doesn't matter which one.
Aw, crap.
That is actually a thing.
You thought this day would never come but you thought wrong.
What did he say? I-I couldn't hear a word.
- I thought you might know.
- No.
I didn't.
I don't like it not one bit.
Go and apologize to him.
Get him back here with us.
Dad, he's the one that blew this out of proportion.
I mean, he left the firm, he went to go work for our competitors, who, by the way, if you ask me, might have some questionable motives.
Now I know where Ethan got his rage.
Wait, are you suggesting that they don't want him simply because he's a great attorney? Stew, just settle out of court.
I can't bear to see my sons tear each other apart in public.
Just do it for me, your dad.
Fine, Dad, I will talk to the client and see if they want to settle.
Good.
But I'm not apologizing.
Good.
Oh, man, I hope nobody gets the wrong idea.
About what? You and me hangin' back whispering like this.
Oh.
You're still Okay.
- All right, let's have sex.
- What? Yeah, why don't you go into the men's room and then I'll wait 30 seconds and follow you in? Uh, okay, I mean, we could do that, but I'm like, is now the best time? You know, because we're, uh, we're just so swamped with the divorce case - and all that at the - Right.
Right, that's a good point.
Why don't we do it - right after the trial ends - Okay.
in this room, right here on this table.
And you know what? You better not be a jerk and be all quiet during it.
No.
I won't.
- Can I leave? - Yeah.
Okay.
I'll-I'll go prepare.
I'll go prepare.
She's pushing for the house.
Well, her husband built it before their marriage, - so I don't think we can get it.
- I definitely think we can get Mrs.
Pascal at least 30 grand in alimony.
Pascalimony.
You cooking something, Dean? I don't know yet.
Hey, somebody want to I got it.
I'm getting it.
Guys, you know what? This is nice.
Usually, there's nobody around to write this stuff down.
Think.
- How many great ideas - Down the toilet.
I just had a thought.
Deano, you want to break off a small room on it? On Pascalimony? See where it goes? We'll keep cranking on this.
You sure? You guys okay with that? Yeah, okay? I'm just bummed I'm not gonna be there to see the process.
Watch you take this thing further down the field.
- Yeah, how many soldiers you need? - I'm thinking maybe a couple.
- You know, how 'bout you guys? - Sure.
- Count me in.
- Lock and load.
Let's do this.
The client wants to settle.
He doesn't even care about the alimony.
Ooh.
I want to divorce that guy.
Wait.
So if he wants to settle, I mean, what's the problem? The problem is, now I have to go to Dean, who's gonna try and get me to apologize.
Which, by the way, is what my dad wants, even though I did nothing wrong.
- Nothing.
- I did nothing wrong.
- Not a thing.
- Are you mocking me or being serious? 'Cause you're playing it right on the line.
Look, obviously, your brother just wants to be treated like a lawyer, so maybe this is your opportunity to give him what he wants.
And maybe you guys can start talking again and maybe he can help us with the kids again.
Lizzie's dream journal's that bad? Oh, my God.
Look, it's-it's either, like, she is a genius and it's all way over my head or she is a deranged sociopath who needs to be institutionalized.
- Well, it's definitely one of those two.
- Yeah.
- It can't be anything else.
- No.
I've narrowed it down.
We should try to get Dean over here, help us figure it out, I guess.
I mean, I'll take any help I can get.
Uh, Counselor? A moment? Stewart.
Reception alerted me to your presence.
Is this the office from The Grinder? It is.
Rozz/Landy built me a replica.
They wanted me to feel at home.
Which is all I've ever wanted.
From the beginning.
Um well it seems you're - you're very happy here.
- I am happy.
- I'm happy to hear that.
- And I'm happy to hear that.
- Good.
- It's great.
So you said you had some business you wanted to discuss.
Uh, yes.
I have a settlement proposal here.
I think you'll find it fair.
Did Dad send you over - No.
- to discuss the settlement? Well, I mean, yes, he weighed in on the settlement, but I'm here as a lawyer, to talk to you as another member of the the legal profession.
I appreciate that.
It just seems, Dean, uh, that a settlement is really what's in the best interests of both our clients.
Oh, Stew-bone! Always good to see you.
Deano, are you in the middle of something? Yeah.
I sent up the Pascalimony stuff.
Still waiting for some feedback on that.
Gettin' that ready for you.
And I'm just finishing up the proposal on that class action lawsuit that I pitched.
The one against ISIS.
Yep.
Sounds strong.
And now I'm just discussing a settlement offer with opposing counsel.
Settlement, great.
Actually, we should probably all convene for that discussion.
Uh, and if you have a second, we have another client here who would love to meet The Grinder.
Yeah.
You bet.
Stew-beef.
Do they do that a lot? - Do what? - Parade you around to meet new clients.
Parade me around? Like a show pony? No, that's-that's not what I meant.
What exactly did you mean? I just, I just feel like Rozz and Landy are using you for your celebrity.
Just so you can entertain the clients.
My God.
My God.
You just can't be happy for me, can you? You just can't stand to see me succeed on my own terms, as a lawyer.
Certified legal intern.
Oh, well, God forbid I use the wrong terminology, because Stew is the only lawyer in this family.
Dad's a lawyer.
In fact, you're the only not-lawyer in the family.
You know what? You go back to our father and you tell him that my counterproposal to your settlement offer is this.
I will see you in court.
You couldn't have just settled? I tried, Dad.
He tore it up.
You ever heard of tape? You know, Claire, um about this arrangement we have which I'm still, I'm totally into, um Oh, right, right.
Thank you for reminding me.
- Wh? - Hey, Stewart, Mr.
Sanderson, Todd and I are gonna be needing the conference room tonight around 6:00 p.
m.
, and under no circumstances are we to be interrupted, no matter what you hear.
'Cause it might get loud - and a little disturbing.
- What? - Whatever you need.
- Sounds good.
I'm just feeling a tickle in the back of my throat.
You're not sick, you're fine.
I think I might be sick.
Hey, FYI Judge Adams is a bit of a Grinder fan.
Ooh, that's never not nice to hear.
So if you want to open with a few "Grinder rests," that'll go a long way.
Well, I can't open with "Grinder rests.
" What would I be resting? Yeah, Rozz, what would he be resting? Dean and I don't even know what you're talking about.
Good morning, all.
I'm told the two sides couldn't come to a settlement, so we'll go ahead and start with opening arguments.
Mr.
Sanderson, you're up.
Thank you, Your Honor.
Uh, our client, Mr.
Pascal, built his home prior to his marriage - to Mrs.
Pascal - Objection! Uh, you can't object.
This is opening arguments.
He's right.
Don't do that.
Then not an objection, a comment.
My client poured countless hours into this property, both in terms of remod Objection.
He's still objecting.
Objection.
I made it very clear that I was not objecting, merely commenting for my client, who spent countless hours pouring her heart - Your Honor, he's still doing it.
- Yes, I'm aware.
Mr.
Sanderson, you need to stop talking.
You need to stop talking! And you need to stop baiting your brother.
I wasn't.
I-I was just Your Honor, neither objecting nor commenting, you are absolutely right.
He was clearly baiting me.
I was not baiting you, Dean.
I was just trying to Okay.
I know this isn't a legal term, but I'm calling a do-over.
We'll take a short recess, and I'd like you both to be better at this when we come back.
You were winning.
Everyone in that courtroom knows it.
This is not on you.
It's just luck of the judge.
We thought he was a fan.
Obviously we misread that.
No, guys, I got to own this one.
It's my bad.
I came in a little hot, but I got this.
I was up all night studying property law.
Now I'm wondering and this is 'cause of the judge thing should Pat and I maybe take the lead when we get back? And Dean could what? Maybe comfort Ms.
Pascal.
Oh, yeah.
We do like to go above and beyond for our clients.
So you guys continue the case and I comfort Ms.
Pascal? Ah, great idea, Dean.
Yes, she is hurting.
So what? I would take her to dinner.
Is that what you're thinking? Is it dinner? Is it drinks? Or do we forget dinner? Is dinner not even a part of it? That's your call.
But then I'm back in court? Depends on how late dinner goes, if you know what I'm saying.
Huh? Huh? Yeah, no, I-I know what you're saying.
You want me to entertain the client.
- Yes! - Sick.
See you in a bit.
How could I have been so blind? Thank you, Mr.
Pascal.
Your Honor, no further questions.
- Uh, Your Honor? - Further questions! This will be good.
I can take it from here, Rozz.
He got my name right.
Mr.
Pascal, how long were you and your wife married? - Eight years.
- Wow.
That's a long time.
Relationships are tricky.
They're filled with good moments and some not so good moments.
Maybe sometimes you both say things that we regret, and then pride gets in the way and you can't take it back.
Perhaps your wife should've been more grateful.
- Isn't he on our side? - Shh.
And when you decided to part ways, it was only because you were doing what you thought was best for both of you.
It was mainly because she had a boyfriend.
You see what your brother's doing, don't you? Objection, Your Honor.
I'm sure that Mrs.
Pascal contributed a lot to the household.
And my client would just like it stated for the record that without her contributions, it would've not felt like a like a home.
I actually don't want that on the record.
I do not feel that way.
Objection, Your Honor.
My client would also like something on the record and that is that - she appreciates that.
- Huh? - You've lost.
- That's not an objection.
That's a comment.
And I'll allow it.
This is not what I want at all! This isn't about what you want.
Your Honor? This is nice.
I think they were talking about their own personal stuff.
Yeah, Todd.
I am so proud of you guys.
Even though we both got fired by our clients mid-trial? I don't think anybody was paying any attention to that.
Oh.
Fellas? I'm afraid I have to decline your offer to work at Rozz/Landy.
I'm with Sanderson & Yao.
Damn right you are! Decline the offer? You've already been working for us.
You never cared about that little room we broke off for Pascalimony, did you? No, we didn't.
Well, now you'll never know.
It was a lot of good stuff.
Oh, geez.
Oh, no, Claire.
You know what I just realized? Now that Dean's back, you and me can't happen.
What? No.
Yeah, I was so damn psyched to achieve and maintain an erection with you.
I mean, I was really, really looking forward to it, but if you're sure.
I'm sure, so sorry.
Sorry.
Please don't ever leave again.
"I'm not here.
"I'm not here.
I'm not here.
"I'm not here.
"I'm not here.
"I'm here barely.
" It's really good.
And I totally get where you're coming from.
He does? I knew you would.
I really poured myself into it, blindly.
- And that reads.
- It does? E, how long did you meditate today? I only got 15 minutes in.
Bro, you got to push yourself.
You feel that Hulk anger coming up, you got to use your breath.
I needed this.
Dad? Do you feel what's happening here? Uh, yeah, I, uh, I feel it.
We're really glad you're back, Dean.
And do you feel exactly the same way, Stew? Yeah.
I do.
Me, too.
Oh! I've got a surprise for everyone.
Put on one of these blindfolds and meet me in the backyard in three minutes.
Uh, do we have to put these on? They won't work otherwise.
God, I've missed this.
- Okay.
- Okay.
I overreacted when you asked me about my future plans because I didn't have any.
I do now.
Take off your blindfolds! - Huh? - What happened?! - I bought the house behind you.
- Houses.
- I'm sorry - Then, where are they? I knocked them down.
They were all wrong.
Then, where are the Lublands? I relocated them.
And I think they're gonna be happier for it.
I'm gonna build my dream house so I can be closer to my family.
How long is that gonna take? Eh, I don't know.
Couple of months, a few years.
- That sounds vague.
- It's general.
I feel like they could narrow that window.
But in the meantime Yes, uh, in in the meantime, you should stay here.
Are you sure? Because I don't want to put you guys out.
No, no.
We-we would all love to have you.
You're-you're gonna put the fence back though, right? Nope.
It was over the property line.