Adventure Time with Finn & Jake s01e13 Episode Script
City of Thieves
[mouse squeaks .]
[penguins chirp .]
[all cheering .]
[screeches .]
Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the dog and Finn the human The fun will never end lt's Adventure Time You're totally slow, dude.
Speed up them gams.
[panting .]
l'm not used to running on all fours! Aah! Ready to admit it's harder than it looks? l'll never admit anything to you.
Hey! Where'd you go? [laughs .]
Whoa! Ugh! Okay, l admit, it's -- it's harder than l thought.
[both laugh .]
Actually, you did pretty good.
Hey, check it out.
- Whoa! Looks like a giant dead turtle.
l think it's some kind of city of Thieves! lt's the city of thieves! Be warned, boy! All who enter the city are destined to become thieves themselves.
[laughs .]
Even you! l wouldn't become a thief, lady! l'm a pretty good guy.
Yeah, get your glasses on, grandma.
This kid is pure.
ln fact, he's about to help that little crying kid.
- Oh, whoa! - Be warned! Enough, lady! Hey, little girl, are you okay? Please, don't steal anything from me! Whoa! We wouldn't do that.
We're heroes.
We wanna turn your frown all the way around.
Aah! [crying .]
- Jake! - l'll face the other way but l'm gonna keep doing this.
So, what's wrong? Oh, it was terrible.
l was trying to sell my flowers out here in the desert when these two thieves came and stole my whole basket, then ran into the city.
- The city? - Of thieves! Oh, boy.
Heed my warning, boy! Enter the city, and you'll come out a thief! Never! l'll get this girl's flowers back.
My name's Penny.
l'll get Penny's flowers back and come out of that city as pure as the driven snow.
Let's go, Jake! Yeah! We're gonna purify that city! [thieves laughing .]
[panting .]
- Cool! - Crud.
My ring! [both gasp .]
Stop, thief! - Rrr! - Aah! Stop! My ruby! Stop, baby! Don't steal! [crying .]
Don't steal, Mr.
Turtle.
Finn, it's hopeless to try stopping a thief here.
Everyone steals from each other.
lt's ri-doo-doo-diculous! Penny! Never say that! 'Cause l'm gonna get your basket back from whoever took it, and then l'm going to beat my purity into them! And then l'm gonna beat your purity out of them and then beat a sandwich into them.
[grunting .]
And then beat them to the punch! And then punch them! - We can beat these thieves while we search for Penny's flower basket.
Okay! Yah! Hey, ''Turd-le.
'' l'm gonna kick your butt! Also, have you seen this little girl's flower basket? You're going down, Turtle! Whoa.
l want jets.
Yah! Come back, crossbow guy! Ha ha! My crossbow! Hey! My basket! That's my basket! Don't worry, Penny.
We'll get it right after l deal with thls guy.
Stealing's wrong, doofus! [chuckles .]
This is fun, Finn! Whoo! [laughing .]
- Poodaw! - My bro! My body! l'm gonna steal your flower basket, wizard! Pancake, pancake, pancake.
Meow! [laughs stupidly .]
- Whoa, brother! - Yah! My glasses.
[laughs .]
My jammies! My glasses! Ow! - There it goes! [giggles .]
l will smite thee, goblin thief! You stole that basket from me.
No, l didn't.
Hey! Gimme that! l stole it first! l'll use my sword on you.
Hey! You, there! lt's time to step inside the purification chamber, son.
Hey! [line squeaking .]
Huh? [panting .]
How are we supposed to get that basket back if it keeps being stolen?! Ugh! Hey! We can steal a new one from that guy.
He's got lots of flower baskets and boots.
l'd like to steal me one of them pairs of boots, especially.
No, Jake.
We can't steal.
We have to stay pure.
O-kay.
l have an idea.
My mom used to tell me that there's a king of thieves who lives in the center of the city, and everything that gets stolen from little girls ends up at his tower.
Maybe we'd find my basket in his treasure chest.
That's a great idea, Penny.
There's one thing, though.
The tower that he lives in is surrounded by a magical barrier which magically keeps thieves out.
Have you forgotten? We three ain't thieves.
We're pure! Right, Jake? Jake? Just gotta steal these boots.
- Jake! - Huh? - Hey, go away! - What are you doing, man? lt's the city! lt's getting to me! Help me, Finn! - l'm here for you, buddy.
Thank you, Finn.
Thank you.
Rah! No! l won't let you become a thief! Uh, what are these? Bells.
That way, l'll hear if you try to steal again.
Oh! Hmm.
[bells jingling .]
The king of thieves' tower is right up here.
[both breathing heavily .]
Whoa! You ready to pass through, Penny? l'm too afraid.
ls it okay if l wait out here? Sure.
Come on, let's go, Jake! [breathing heavily .]
Coming.
Jake, where'd you get those boots? Huh? What? What boots? Oh, no! l stole! The city -- it took advantage of me! Ugh! Jake, you're a thief now.
You won't be able to get in anymore.
Yes, l can.
Oof! Oh.
Heh! [sighs .]
lt's up to me now.
Legend says you'll find the loot in the king of thieves' chest.
Good luck, Finn.
Oh, yeah, and that high window is the only entrance.
Hmm.
All right, wish me luck.
- She already did, man.
- Oh, yeah.
Right.
[grunting .]
Whoo! Yeah, Finn! Ugh! Great, now l gotta climb down? Huh? [screaming .]
Whoa! The king of thieves.
Uh sorry to trespass.
l just, uh Hello? The chest! lt's ln his chest.
Thanks.
[rat squeaks .]
Aah! You see, if you have too much earwax, you won't be able to hear anymore.
- l got it, guys! - The chest! Gimme that! - Huh?! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Easy, kid.
[laughs evilly .]
Wha?! l-ls your basket under all that gold? Of course it's not! l set you up to steal this chest of gold! l couldn't get past the barrier 'cause l'm a thief! But you're just a cute little girl! And l'm a thief! Well, if this isn't yours, l'm gonna return it right now! Huh? Why can't l You stole something in the city.
Now you're a thief! No.
No-o-o-o! What have l done?! What have l become?! You've become a thief, stupid.
[laughs evilly .]
My hands, they're all dirty, covered in the dust of a criminal act.
l'm a thief! [laughs evilly .]
Huh? Whoa! Ugh! Ooh, what did l tell you, boy? This city will get to you, no matter how pure you think you are! [laughs evilly .]
l was right.
Hey! That's enough from you, hag! Aah! Hey! Finn? Don't touch me! l'm impure, man! Unfit to be a hero.
Unfit to be your friend.
Come on, Finn.
Keep it together.
No, Jake.
This is a one-way path down a jacked-up road, and l got to walk it alone.
l'm not gonna leave you alone in this city.
You're my buddy.
Besides, l stole these boots.
These super-babe-style boots.
So l'm just as dirty as you are, Finn.
We got to walk this filthy path together.
Then we shall embrace the darkness of this wicked city and use the methods of the criminal to seek vengeance on Penny.
Cowabunga! Cowabunga, indeed.
[neighing .]
Yah! [whinnies .]
PENNY: Mm.
Yes.
Yeah.
Wha?! ls someone there? Hmm.
Heh.
- Penny.
- Huh? lt's me, Penny -- the hero whose purity you stole.
And l'm here to enact my revenge upon you.
Aah! Hi, Penny.
Finn, please don't punch my lights out.
l'm just a poor homeless baby girl! l trusted you, Penny.
You made me steal.
And you took my purity.
You ruined me! l'm sorry, Finn! Let me give you some, uh, gems or some gold.
Or, uh, have some knife in your neck! - Watch out, Finn! - Aah! Oof! Ow! Ugh! - Thanks, dude.
- Yeah, dude.
You may have soiled my purity, but l think you can still come out clean.
Come on, Jake! [chuckles .]
No! No! [blubbering.]
Nice work, dude.
FlNN: She's purified.
l feel clean, like all the filth of the city and wrongdoings are gone.
Thank you, ''F'' and ''J.
'' l haven't felt like this since l was young! You're welcome! Whoa, dude! The soap got on us, too.
We're clean! BOTH: Yes! This good deed we did has purified us once again.
We're virgin islands! Finn, thank you for this second chance to live a purer life.
And you know what that means, Penny.
No more stealing.
- Never again.
Well, l think it's time for us to get the math out of here.
l'm going to miss you, Finn! - l'll miss you, too.
- Goodbye.
Whoa, dude.
- Why are you naked? - Aah! Penny! Come along with me and the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest and do so as we please Come along with me to a cliff under a tree
[penguins chirp .]
[all cheering .]
[screeches .]
Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the dog and Finn the human The fun will never end lt's Adventure Time You're totally slow, dude.
Speed up them gams.
[panting .]
l'm not used to running on all fours! Aah! Ready to admit it's harder than it looks? l'll never admit anything to you.
Hey! Where'd you go? [laughs .]
Whoa! Ugh! Okay, l admit, it's -- it's harder than l thought.
[both laugh .]
Actually, you did pretty good.
Hey, check it out.
- Whoa! Looks like a giant dead turtle.
l think it's some kind of city of Thieves! lt's the city of thieves! Be warned, boy! All who enter the city are destined to become thieves themselves.
[laughs .]
Even you! l wouldn't become a thief, lady! l'm a pretty good guy.
Yeah, get your glasses on, grandma.
This kid is pure.
ln fact, he's about to help that little crying kid.
- Oh, whoa! - Be warned! Enough, lady! Hey, little girl, are you okay? Please, don't steal anything from me! Whoa! We wouldn't do that.
We're heroes.
We wanna turn your frown all the way around.
Aah! [crying .]
- Jake! - l'll face the other way but l'm gonna keep doing this.
So, what's wrong? Oh, it was terrible.
l was trying to sell my flowers out here in the desert when these two thieves came and stole my whole basket, then ran into the city.
- The city? - Of thieves! Oh, boy.
Heed my warning, boy! Enter the city, and you'll come out a thief! Never! l'll get this girl's flowers back.
My name's Penny.
l'll get Penny's flowers back and come out of that city as pure as the driven snow.
Let's go, Jake! Yeah! We're gonna purify that city! [thieves laughing .]
[panting .]
- Cool! - Crud.
My ring! [both gasp .]
Stop, thief! - Rrr! - Aah! Stop! My ruby! Stop, baby! Don't steal! [crying .]
Don't steal, Mr.
Turtle.
Finn, it's hopeless to try stopping a thief here.
Everyone steals from each other.
lt's ri-doo-doo-diculous! Penny! Never say that! 'Cause l'm gonna get your basket back from whoever took it, and then l'm going to beat my purity into them! And then l'm gonna beat your purity out of them and then beat a sandwich into them.
[grunting .]
And then beat them to the punch! And then punch them! - We can beat these thieves while we search for Penny's flower basket.
Okay! Yah! Hey, ''Turd-le.
'' l'm gonna kick your butt! Also, have you seen this little girl's flower basket? You're going down, Turtle! Whoa.
l want jets.
Yah! Come back, crossbow guy! Ha ha! My crossbow! Hey! My basket! That's my basket! Don't worry, Penny.
We'll get it right after l deal with thls guy.
Stealing's wrong, doofus! [chuckles .]
This is fun, Finn! Whoo! [laughing .]
- Poodaw! - My bro! My body! l'm gonna steal your flower basket, wizard! Pancake, pancake, pancake.
Meow! [laughs stupidly .]
- Whoa, brother! - Yah! My glasses.
[laughs .]
My jammies! My glasses! Ow! - There it goes! [giggles .]
l will smite thee, goblin thief! You stole that basket from me.
No, l didn't.
Hey! Gimme that! l stole it first! l'll use my sword on you.
Hey! You, there! lt's time to step inside the purification chamber, son.
Hey! [line squeaking .]
Huh? [panting .]
How are we supposed to get that basket back if it keeps being stolen?! Ugh! Hey! We can steal a new one from that guy.
He's got lots of flower baskets and boots.
l'd like to steal me one of them pairs of boots, especially.
No, Jake.
We can't steal.
We have to stay pure.
O-kay.
l have an idea.
My mom used to tell me that there's a king of thieves who lives in the center of the city, and everything that gets stolen from little girls ends up at his tower.
Maybe we'd find my basket in his treasure chest.
That's a great idea, Penny.
There's one thing, though.
The tower that he lives in is surrounded by a magical barrier which magically keeps thieves out.
Have you forgotten? We three ain't thieves.
We're pure! Right, Jake? Jake? Just gotta steal these boots.
- Jake! - Huh? - Hey, go away! - What are you doing, man? lt's the city! lt's getting to me! Help me, Finn! - l'm here for you, buddy.
Thank you, Finn.
Thank you.
Rah! No! l won't let you become a thief! Uh, what are these? Bells.
That way, l'll hear if you try to steal again.
Oh! Hmm.
[bells jingling .]
The king of thieves' tower is right up here.
[both breathing heavily .]
Whoa! You ready to pass through, Penny? l'm too afraid.
ls it okay if l wait out here? Sure.
Come on, let's go, Jake! [breathing heavily .]
Coming.
Jake, where'd you get those boots? Huh? What? What boots? Oh, no! l stole! The city -- it took advantage of me! Ugh! Jake, you're a thief now.
You won't be able to get in anymore.
Yes, l can.
Oof! Oh.
Heh! [sighs .]
lt's up to me now.
Legend says you'll find the loot in the king of thieves' chest.
Good luck, Finn.
Oh, yeah, and that high window is the only entrance.
Hmm.
All right, wish me luck.
- She already did, man.
- Oh, yeah.
Right.
[grunting .]
Whoo! Yeah, Finn! Ugh! Great, now l gotta climb down? Huh? [screaming .]
Whoa! The king of thieves.
Uh sorry to trespass.
l just, uh Hello? The chest! lt's ln his chest.
Thanks.
[rat squeaks .]
Aah! You see, if you have too much earwax, you won't be able to hear anymore.
- l got it, guys! - The chest! Gimme that! - Huh?! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Easy, kid.
[laughs evilly .]
Wha?! l-ls your basket under all that gold? Of course it's not! l set you up to steal this chest of gold! l couldn't get past the barrier 'cause l'm a thief! But you're just a cute little girl! And l'm a thief! Well, if this isn't yours, l'm gonna return it right now! Huh? Why can't l You stole something in the city.
Now you're a thief! No.
No-o-o-o! What have l done?! What have l become?! You've become a thief, stupid.
[laughs evilly .]
My hands, they're all dirty, covered in the dust of a criminal act.
l'm a thief! [laughs evilly .]
Huh? Whoa! Ugh! Ooh, what did l tell you, boy? This city will get to you, no matter how pure you think you are! [laughs evilly .]
l was right.
Hey! That's enough from you, hag! Aah! Hey! Finn? Don't touch me! l'm impure, man! Unfit to be a hero.
Unfit to be your friend.
Come on, Finn.
Keep it together.
No, Jake.
This is a one-way path down a jacked-up road, and l got to walk it alone.
l'm not gonna leave you alone in this city.
You're my buddy.
Besides, l stole these boots.
These super-babe-style boots.
So l'm just as dirty as you are, Finn.
We got to walk this filthy path together.
Then we shall embrace the darkness of this wicked city and use the methods of the criminal to seek vengeance on Penny.
Cowabunga! Cowabunga, indeed.
[neighing .]
Yah! [whinnies .]
PENNY: Mm.
Yes.
Yeah.
Wha?! ls someone there? Hmm.
Heh.
- Penny.
- Huh? lt's me, Penny -- the hero whose purity you stole.
And l'm here to enact my revenge upon you.
Aah! Hi, Penny.
Finn, please don't punch my lights out.
l'm just a poor homeless baby girl! l trusted you, Penny.
You made me steal.
And you took my purity.
You ruined me! l'm sorry, Finn! Let me give you some, uh, gems or some gold.
Or, uh, have some knife in your neck! - Watch out, Finn! - Aah! Oof! Ow! Ugh! - Thanks, dude.
- Yeah, dude.
You may have soiled my purity, but l think you can still come out clean.
Come on, Jake! [chuckles .]
No! No! [blubbering.]
Nice work, dude.
FlNN: She's purified.
l feel clean, like all the filth of the city and wrongdoings are gone.
Thank you, ''F'' and ''J.
'' l haven't felt like this since l was young! You're welcome! Whoa, dude! The soap got on us, too.
We're clean! BOTH: Yes! This good deed we did has purified us once again.
We're virgin islands! Finn, thank you for this second chance to live a purer life.
And you know what that means, Penny.
No more stealing.
- Never again.
Well, l think it's time for us to get the math out of here.
l'm going to miss you, Finn! - l'll miss you, too.
- Goodbye.
Whoa, dude.
- Why are you naked? - Aah! Penny! Come along with me and the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest and do so as we please Come along with me to a cliff under a tree