Georgie and Mandy's First Marriage (2024) s01e13 Episode Script

1
[sniffing]
Smell this.
I will not.
I just want to know
if I can wear it again.
Well, I think if you have
to ask, you have your answer.
Great.
Hey, before I forget, will you pick up a
few things for me at the hardware store?
Ugh, I hate going there.
- Why?
- They treat me like I'm an idiot.
Really?
They're always nice to me.
Gee, I wonder
what the difference is.
One of us is too fancy
to smell a shirt?
Well, I'm a woman, Georgie.
They talk down to me
and then they hit on me.
- Well, that's got to feel nice.
- No.
There's places I get treated different,
too, 'cause I'm a man.
Really? Like where?
Uh, like when I take CeeCee
to the park.
All the moms act like I'm some kind
of hero for taking care of my kid.
That's your example?
Yeah, and then
they hit on me.
It-it was horrible?
♪
[coos]
♪
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
[chuckles]
Nice keychain.
It's my wife's car.
Makes sense.
I did not peg you
as a bedazzled Miata man.
[laughs]
Hey, let me ask you something,
why didn't your wife
bring it in?
I don't know.
She makes me do the car stuff.
Mm.
Hmm. Makes sense.
You think there's anything in here
that would make her feel uncomfortable?
Why?
I just think it'd be great if this were
a place your wife wanted to come.
Why do you want my wife
to come here?
No, not just your wife,
any wife.
And not just wives-- moms,
daughters, we want 'em all.
Okay.
Hey, tell your wife, McAllister
Auto loves the ladies.
Do I want to know?
You ever wonder why we don't
get many women customers?
Not after that.
Well, I've come to realize there's
some places women don't feel welcome,
and I don't want this
to be one of 'em.
Well, cars are just
more of a guy thing.
Women drive cars, too.
That's why there's
so many accidents, am I right?
[both laugh]
You might be onto something.
♪
Why are you reading Cosmo?
Trying to learn how women think.
Did you know there's a lot
of dirty stuff in here?
Are there pictures?
- Sometimes.
- Hmm.
Listen to this,
"The Health Benefits of Sex."
"Travels in His
Erogenous Zone"?
I don't know what that is.
"11 Secrets
of World-Class Lovers."
11? I only got two,
three tops.
"Number one: Communication."
Mm, next.
"Number two: Be enthusiastic."
Brother, if a girl's getting naked,
I'm enthusiastic.
- Agreed.
- Mm-hmm.
"Number three:
Engage the senses."
What's that mean?
Mm, "Soft lighting,
scented candles."
Ugh, boring. Next.
Ooh, this is good.
"When to lick and when to bite."
Ooh.
What are you jackasses doing?
Learning about women.
- Uh, for business purposes.
- Mm-hmm.
How does "licking and biting"
help business?
Well, that one don't,
but there's other things in here that can.
Wait, go back, what are we
licking, what are we biting?
Go back to fixing cars.
Okay, okay.
So what's the answer?
I figure, with just a few
changes, we could be the only
woman-friendly
tire store in town.
This ought to be good.
What changes?
For starters, we got some lady
magazines for the waiting area.
And flavored creamers
for the coffee.
Fat-free.
Y'all like fat-free.
We picked up a few of them
fancy-smelling candles.
Did you at least
clean the bathroom?
Don't need to. We got candles.
Did it ever occur to you
to ask a woman what she'd like?
No.
In our defense,
there weren't none around.
And now there are.
So what you got?
Well, first of all, candles
are not cleaning products.
[scoffs] At 12 bucks a pop,
they should be.
You spent 12 bucks
on a candle?
It was lavender.
Candles aren't gonna
change anything.
Tire stores are just
kind of a dude space.
Okay, well, what if a woman
worked there?
Mm. I can't afford
another employee.
Well, Mrs. McAllister
could do it.
You want me there?
[laughing]
You want her there?
Oh, you were
surprised, too.
I suppose I could come in
a few days a week.
[chuckles]
Jim, what do you think?
Um
always love having you around.
Nice try.
No, honey, really, it's great.
Just move on.
You want to make the store
more woman-friendly,
first thing we do
is clean the bathroom.
[grunts] Fair enough.
[sniffles]
[sighs] Probably gonna need
a toilet seat, too.
Oh, my God.
So
you're gonna be working
with my mom. That's fun.
You being sarcastic?
Oh, could you not tell?
Here, let me try again.
That's fun!
It's gonna be fine.
You have no concerns?
She'll get to see me in my element,
doing what I do best.
I don't know, Georgie, it kind of seems
like the frog and the boiling water.
What's that?
Well, it's a metaphor.
The frog is in a pot of water,
and the heat gets turned up little by little
so it doesn't notice it's boiling.
Who's boiling a frog?
It doesn't matter.
Are they making frog soup?
It's not a real thing.
Oh, good, 'cause
I would not eat frog soup.
I-I'm just saying,
my mom's gradually
starting to like you,
so maybe don't turn up
the heat too fast.
Okay, I get it,
I get it.
Okay, good.
- Good night.
- Good night.
[sighs]
- Can I tell you a secret?
- Sure.
When I was little, I had
one of those stuffed frog toys.
- Uh-huh?
- It freaked me out.
So should we
carpool tomorrow?
Well, we are going
to the same place.
We sure are.
You worried about me and you
spending so much time together?
What? No. Dream team.
What about me and Georgie?
Very worried.
Me, too.
Well [sighs]
you could try
being nice to him.
I know, but sometimes
his sunny optimism
just makes me want to tear
him apart with my words.
[chuckles]
That's a joke, right?
Of course.
I want to believe you.
- Can I get the keys to the Chevy?
- Yeah, sure thing.
Good morning, Ruben.
Oh. Hey, Mrs. McAllister.
This is a nice surprise.
Yeah, she gonna be helping
us out up front for a while.
Phasing Georgie out.
Love it.
We're not phasing
anyone out.
Hey.
Oh, come on,
he's right there. Do it.
You try any of those
flavored creamers?
Hazelnut's pretty tasty.
I prefer half-and-half.
You know,
I have always wondered,
what's the half
and what's the other half?
It's cream and milk.
Hmm, kind of a letdown.
How we doing over here?
Great. She's a fountain
of information.
Drink from me.
So what's the plan?
Well, for starters, I think
I'm gonna go buy some plants,
flowers, ooh,
maybe a little music.
Mm, engaging the senses.
[chuckles]
That's right out of Cosmo.
And this floor,
does it bother you
that it's sticky?
Well, no, that's
a safety precaution.
Yeah. Never had a slip and fall.
Jim, it's filthy.
Well, we're not eating off it,
we're walking on it.
Georgie, go to
the hardware store
and buy a mop, Pine-Sol,
some wire brushes.
I can pick up that toilet seat
while I'm at it.
This is my second cup of coffee.
Please hurry.
Off to a good start.
Yeah, you bet.
Shut up.
[dishwasher rumbling
rhythmically]
What you doing?
Uh, a pan in the dishwasher's
making a cool rhythm.
So, you're not on any drugs
at all, this is just you?
I do take a multivitamin.
Are you snorting it?
Who needs a drummer?
I got a Maytag.
♪
Hey, make sure you try
the new toilet seat.
I got the deluxe padded kind.
I did. Terrific.
Let's just try to keep in mind
that most of our
customers are men.
We don't want to scare 'em off.
Oh, I'm sorry,
I didn't realize flowers
were so scary.
[sarcastic laugh] All right,
enough. You know what I meant.
Look, a lady.
It's working.
Hey, Jim.
- Rita, you remember my wife Audrey.
- Hi.
Hi.
Love what you've done
with the place.
That was all
Mrs. McAllister.
Oh, it was a team effort,
and you know it.
Well, it looks great.
Oh, she ain't a customer.
That don't count.
[door opens]
Just think about it--
a Mother's Day sale,
- all moms get half off.
- We'd lose money.
In the short term,
but you'd gain clients
who would come back,
and not just on Mother's Day.
You got your President's Day,
your Labor Day,
your Yom Kippur.
Hey, how'd it go?
Your mom and I
are a great team.
Oh, stop, you were gonna make
that sale before I walked over.
Wow, so you two
really got along.
They really, really did.
What's for dinner?
Uh, Connor
ordered a pizza.
Great.
Connor.
[dishwasher continues
rumbling rhythmically]
- Yeah.
- You ordered a pizza?
On its way.
Yes, I'd like to order a pizza.
♪
I'm just saying,
a new coat of paint out front
would really freshen
the place up.
Yeah, let me guess, pink?
[scoffs]
Don't be silly.
[chuckles]
Terracotta.
The hell is terracotta?
Oh, like an earthy red,
very classy.
It doesn't matter. We don't
have the budget for painters.
Oh, you don't need to hire anybody.
Me and Ruben'll do it.
Do what?
Paint the outside
of the store.
Oh. 'Cause I'm Hispanic,
I know how to paint buildings?
No, no, no,
that ain't what I meant.
And for the record,
I've never once thought of you as Hispanic.
What do you think I am?
Well, mean and unhappy.
That's fair.
God, you're a handsome devil.
What you watching?
Clint Eastwood.
Oh, the one
with the monkey?
The best.
You ever wonder what happened
to the monkey?
I always hoped
he'd retired someplace nice.
You know Florida, Arizona.
You know, speaking
of unlikely friends,
Mom and Georgie, huh?
Yeah, it's nice.
It is.
It's really nice.
- It's a little weird, though.
- So weird.
You should see 'em
at the store all buddy-buddy.
It's creepy.
You know, if she's not
being hard on him,
it's gonna come out
at someone else.
Am I a bad father
for hoping it's you?
Yes.
Can you keep it down?
I'm recording the toaster oven.
- Maybe it'll be Connor.
- No, it's never Connor.
No, it's never Connor.
[toaster oven dings]
CONNOR:
Perfect.
I'm gonna go
pick up some lunch.
Oh, meatball sub, please.
Oh, I'm going to
the new Greek place.
Greek?
Ooh, I heard they got something
called a gyro.
I don't know what it is,
but I'm dying to find out.
Two to one.
Whoa, hang on.
Ruben.
You want a meatball sub
or-- ugh-- Greek food?
- I love Greek.
- Go back to work.
I'll just grab something
for everyone.
Ain't you sweet?
[door closes]
- You need to stop it.
- What?
Sucking up to her,
ganging up on me.
What are you
talking about?
Well, look what
she's done to the place,
and you're helping.
What do you
want me to do?
I don't know,
just
keep in mind,
I liked you before she did.
Thank you.
Fine. Sorry.
JIM:
Son of a bitch!
[winces]
- You know, I was thinking
- Ugh.
if we paint the
outside of the store,
it might make
the inside look dingy.
You're right, let's not do it.
Oh, no, I meant let's do
the inside, too. [chuckles]
I don't know. Georgie,
what do you think?
[stammering]:
Oh
We'd have to take everything
off the walls
and-and move all the tires
out of the showroom, and
it'd be a lot of work.
That's a good point.
I hadn't thought of that.
Mom and I did the nursery
in a couple days.
- It wasn't that big a deal.
- Yeah, well, you got paint fumes,
and we might have
to shut down for a day.
That's just lost revenue.
That's another good point.
All right,
what's going on?
Nothing.
I agree.
Did you say
something to him?
Um, I don't think so.
Did I?
No, you did not.
Look me in the
eye and say
you had nothing to do with him
suddenly being on your side.
[scoffs]
I had nothing to do with him
suddenly being on my side.
You are unbelievable!
[doorbell rings]
- I'll get it.
- Don't you move.
[doorbell ringing]
Amanda.
Damn, hate to miss this.
[doorbell continues ringing]
- Connor, what the hell are you doing?
- Shh. I'm making music.
[doorbell continues ringing]
- What'd I miss?
- I like the way my store is.
I hate all these changes.
They were good changes, though.
Weren't they, Georgie?
- Well, I
- Tell her what you really think.
[stammers]
Help me.
Okay, this might be
a "you two" issue
and not a Georgie issue.
I didn't realize, when you invited me
to come work at the store,
that you wanted
a silent partner.
Oh, come on, Audrey,
when have you ever been silent?
You want silence?
I'll show you silence.
[doorbell continues ringing]
AUDREY: Connor, knock it off!
Sweet.
[sighs] I feel like it's my fault
your parents are fighting.
Oh, sweetie,
that's because it is.
That ain't helping.
Well, if only
somebody had warned you
that working with my mother
was a bad idea.
Hey, you said we weren't gonna
get along, and we did.
Is everyone unhappy?
Yes.
Then I was right.
Should I do something?
Yes, you should rub my feet.
I'm serious.
So am I.
Fine.
[sighs]
Remember when you were pregnant,
and your ankles looked like water balloons?
Just rub.
[sighs]
JIM: Yeah?
- Can I come in?
- AUDREY: Sure.
Mandy said I shouldn't bug you,
but I got to get something
off my chest.
Well, can't it wait
till morning?
[sighs] I'm afraid not.
Mrs. McAllister,
I was going along with all your plans
'cause it felt nice for me
and you to be getting along.
And Mr. McAllister,
you've always had my back.
And I never want you to think
that I don't have yours.
So, y'all don't be mad
at each other, be mad at me.
This is my fault.
I appreciate that,
but we're fine.
Really?
This isn't our first fight.
We argue, we make up,
that's marriage.
Yeah. Go to bed,
get some sleep.
[sighs] Thank you.
Good night.
[door closes]
You think he heard us
doing it?
No, I think we're good.
♪
♪
Can I get your opinion
on something?
Sure.
I made a song out of the sounds
of our house.
Cool.
It's called
"The Sounds of Our House."
Clever.
[song made of household
appliance noises playing]
That's the dishwasher.
Vacuum.
Front door.
Huh. This is actually fun.
I'm actually fun.
[CeeCee crying over recording]
- [Mandy gasps] Is that CeeCee?
She got the solo.
[modulated crying]
[toilet flushes over recording]
So what's your question?
How great is this?
It's pretty great.
I know.
Got a minute?
Sure. Everything okay?
Not really.
Talk to me.
I think I've done just
about all I can do here,
and to be honest, I really
miss my granddaughter.
I think it's time
for me to go home.
Aw.
Don't do that.
I know you weren't happy
with all the changes I made.
That's true,
I wasn't.
But I've come
to really appreciate
what a difference it makes to
work in a beautiful environment.
Of course, if you need me, just pick up
the phone, and I'll come running.
Thank you, I will.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- See you tonight.
- See you tonight.
[door closes]
Georgie. Ruben.
Get all this crap out of here.
Even the toilet seat?
No, that's a keeper.