Sweet Valley High (1994) s01e13 Episode Script
Club X
1 Ohh Ohh Look right down any crowded hall You see there's a beauty standing Is she really everywhere Or a reflection? One always calls out to you The other's shy and quiet Could there be two different girls Who look the same at Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High (alarm shrieking, horn honking) I can't believe it.
What now? (beeps) (explosion) (girl) Jell-O.
Who's responsible for this? (both) Club X.
"Wiggle your way out of this one, Chrome Dome.
Sincerely, Club X.
" (sighs) I should've known.
Club X is really awesome.
Yeah.
I can't believe old Chrome Dome hasn't figured out who they are yet.
Any ideas? (boy) I don't think I've been this happy all year.
(bell rings) Beats me.
I'll see you later.
Nice job on Chrome Dome's car.
You've got the wrong guys, Jess.
We're not in Club X.
Very cute.
Where do I sign up? It's a guy thing, Jess.
They don't let in girls.
I guess that explains why you're not in it.
Ooh, that's gotta hurt.
Todd, where are you going? To play hoops at the park.
Now? But we were supposed to go Sorry.
This game's really important.
We'll talk later.
What's his problem? He promised he'd give me a ride to the shop, and he flaked.
Nice friend.
And every time I try to talk to him, he's got another game of one-on-one.
The guy wins a few games and all of a sudden he's too good to be my chauffeur.
What's the world coming to? Don't take it personally, Winston.
None of us want to be your chauffeur.
Oh.
Come on.
I'll take you.
Mr.
Cooper still upset about his car? Old news.
Club X released the biology frogs into the swimming pool.
That's disgusting.
I know.
Isn't it great? I've got to figure out a way to get into Club X.
Why? It's called "excitement," Liz.
You might want to try it sometime.
Hey, I bet that's from Club X.
Nothing gets by you, does it? Aren't you gonna open it? With you around? In seconds, everyone in school will know what it said.
Jessica, I'm your best friend.
I would never reveal any of your secrets.
I mean, I never told anyone about the time Jay Robertson stood you up, did I? (girl) Oh! (boy) What? Sorry.
Well, I'm going to be late for my weekly shiatsu.
Ciao.
What does Club X want with you? Let's see.
"Come to the warehouse at Millpoint "if you're man enough.
Sincerely, Club X.
" This is killer.
Jess, I think you should stay away from those guys.
Why? It'll be fun.
I can't wait to do something bad.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Sweet Valley will never be the same.
(creak) Who goes there? Halt.
You have trespassed into the domain of Club X.
Ooh.
Oogie-boogie.
I'm so scared.
(boy) Gosh.
I knew it was you, Bruce.
Brilliant, Wakefield.
How's it feel to use your brain for a change? Maybe someday you'll find out yourself, Bruce.
So, where do we start? First comes initiation.
You need to do something to prove you're up to Club X's standards.
I can do anything you can dream up.
So you want me to steal a car? Chilly feet, Wakefield? I hate to disappoint you, Bruce, but it looks like Club X is about to get its first female member.
I'll believe it when you drive away.
(Manny) Hey, man, stealing a car is illegal.
We could really get in trouble.
You mean she could really get in trouble.
Heads up.
Chrome Dome.
(engine starts) (Manny) Whoa, Bruce.
She just stole your car! (gears grind) Hey! That's a new clutch! Patman burned at his own game.
Looks like we found someone sneakier than you, Bruce.
Big mistake, Wakefield.
Are you Kurt Rambis from the Lakers? Yeah.
Can I have your autograph? Sure.
Who do you want me to make this out to? Mm Daddy.
OK.
There you go.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Here, let's see.
What did he put down? Elizabeth? I I thought you left an hour ago.
Me too, but my boyfriend hasn't shown.
Probably in the middle of another one-on-one game.
Can I give you a lift? Sure.
Hey, Todd.
Can't chat, Eggman.
Just grabbing a drink before my next victory.
I'm sure you've made enough money for that rafting trip with Liz by now.
I have.
But there's still a few more things I need new car stereo, some CDs, new high-tops Besides, I can't lose.
Why should I stop now? Because you've grown an ego the size of Alaska.
I have not.
You don't know what you're talking about.
Hey, Liz.
Don't you have something to say? What? You were supposed to pick me up from the charity center an hour ago.
I'm sorry.
I forgot.
It won't happen again.
Yeah.
I've heard that one before.
Yeah, Todd.
You've been blowing us off all week.
Hey, if you all have such a problem with the way I am, maybe you should just leave me alone.
It's like he's another person.
I think he needs some professional help.
Hmm.
I've got just the person in mind.
Welcome to Club X.
Thanks, Bruce.
Sorry about the scratch.
Right.
OK.
Here's how it works.
This is the wheel of misfortune.
Once we decide what we're gonna do next, we spin the wheel to see who carries it out.
If that person wimps out, they must submit to whatever punishment the club decides.
Sounds simple enough.
So what's the next prank? The new fountain.
Cooper unveils it tomorrow at a noontime ceremony.
We put a little soap in it, he looks like a fool in front of everyone.
Sounds like good, clean fun.
It's kinda easy, though.
Everything doesn't have to be brain surgery.
Now all we need is somebody to pull it off.
Your spin, Wakefield.
Jessica.
This must be your lucky day.
(bell rings) "and I want to express my gratitude" Principal Cooper.
Good morning.
Excellent speech.
I am inspired.
You like it? I was thinking of starting off with a joke.
You know the one about Yeah, I'm sure it's very funny.
By the way, I saw the new fountain.
Excellent work by the maintenance woman.
Thanks.
Wait.
We don't have a maintenance woman.
You! Stop.
Hold it right there.
Soap.
Figures.
Oh, I can't believe this.
Oh, man.
Hey, what gives? Whoa! Ohh! Whoa! (girl) Oh, that's gotta hurt.
(boy) Check it out.
Hi, Mr.
Cooper.
What happened to you? Did you see anybody running down this hallway? No, sorry.
I'd stay and help you look, but I'm off to the library.
(squishing) "Library?" Miss Wakefield.
Flash flood in homeroom, Miss Wakefield? Oh, that.
I You put your foot in it this time, young lady.
Mr.
Rambis.
Yeah? This is my friend Winston.
Hi, Winston.
Nice to meet you.
Oh, my God.
I can't believe this is really Kurt Rambis.
I mean, you-you won four World Championships.
Well, I had a little help.
OK.
Where would those guys be without you? You know, I like you, Winston.
That's good, because we need your help.
After all you've done for the charity - name it.
Well, it's about my boyfriend This is all your fault.
Rub it in, why don't you? Wait a minute.
A magnet.
You are true scum, Bruce.
Don't feel so bad.
You did lose to the best.
Yeah, right.
Well, if it isn't the great god Wilkins.
How's the air up on Olympus? Ha-ha.
Too good to speak to us mortals.
Sorry.
Just tell me one thing.
How come you haven't played me yet? You're kidding, right? I'd destroy you.
Kidding? Todd, when I'm through with you, there will be nothing but a sweaty headband.
They'll need a spatula to scrape you off the court.
Save yourself the humiliation, Eggman.
You're right, Todd.
Why risk it? You might ruin your winning streak.
What? OK, Winston.
You want me, you got me.
How much? Everything you've made so far.
No problem.
Plus 50 bucks, just to make it hurt.
Tomorrow, after school.
And bring your piggy bank.
Yes.
(voices outside) Well, look who's here.
Wakefield.
I thought you'd be home licking your wounds after your tango with old Chrome Dome.
He's already gonna give me detention.
Why not live it up a little? She's got a point.
Shall we get to work? There's a football game tomorrow at Municipal Stadium.
Let's say we spice up halftime.
How? One of us will run across the field wearing a ski mask, carrying a "Club X Rules" banner.
(boy) All right.
That's so lame.
Why don't we do something that'll get people's attention? I say the person skydives into the stadium with the banner.
(boy) Whoa! Unless you guys aren't up to it.
OK, Wakefield, skydive it is.
You sure? I mean, it's a great idea, but But what? Chicken? Then it's settled.
Bruce, why don't you spin? It'd be my pleasure.
Well, Wakefield, looks like you're gonna take a dive.
(Manny) Ooh, I'd look again.
Patman.
What? Remember, Bruce, it's not the fall that'll kill you, it's the landing.
You already tied that one, Winston.
My foot shrank.
Is he here? Not yet.
Don't worry.
Dude, if you pull this off, you'll be famous.
And the name Bruce Patman shall become legend.
As it rightfully should be.
Thank you so much, Jessica.
This was a brilliant idea.
To my plane.
Hey, good luck, man.
Hold on a second.
Aren't you going to witness this historical event, Wakefield? I'll catch up.
I just want to make sure your jump is confirmed.
Come on, you guys.
Hello, Coyote Skydiving? I'm calling for Mr.
Patman.
It seems we gave you the wrong drop coordinates.
15 buckets wins.
You start.
(boy) Check it out.
(boy #2) All right.
(Todd clears throat) That's one.
I am in trouble.
I have not yet begun to fight.
That's obvious.
Here, free shot.
Winston, are you OK? My ankle.
I think it's sprained.
Well, too bad, Eggman.
That's game, then.
Hand over the cash.
That's not fair.
He should at least get a replacement.
Replacement? (boy) Yeah.
Fine.
Pick anyone you want.
If you say so.
(boy) How about him? Perfect timing.
How about you? You could take over.
No, you could.
Look who I found.
Todd, I believe you've heard of Kurt Rambis.
Hi, Todd.
How you doing? Uh Kurt Rambis.
How did you You said anyone I could find.
I found him.
Oh, of course, if you're, uh if you're not up to it Oh, no, no.
I'm up to it.
All right.
See if you can stop this.
(laughter) OK, so you've got height.
But I've got speed, youth, agility I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.
You were saying? (laughter) Raise the stakes up higher Above the net where I can see You're gonna have to reach If you want to compete with me 'Cause I'm on top of the world Lookin' down upon your little head Yes, I'm on top of the world And I'm never comin' down again Come on and hit me with your best shot Come on and hit me with your best shot Your best shot, your best shot Whoo! (Kurt) Thanks for the game.
You put up a good fight.
Stick with it a few more years, and you might be able to take me.
Yeah, thanks.
No, I'm serious.
And besides, it is just a game.
Don't forget what's really important.
Bye, Liz.
See you, Winston.
OK.
See you later.
Thanks again, Mr.
Rambis.
No problem.
My pleasure.
I'll see you guys next week.
OK.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
Pay up, Wilkins.
Man.
I'm down 50 bucks.
That was harsh.
Did you have to completely humiliate me? Yes.
Was I really that bad? I guess I got all caught up in it.
I almost lost my two best friends.
Nothing is worth that.
I think you've learned your lesson.
Right, Winston? Winston.
Huh? Oh.
Yeah.
Bye, guys.
We don't care about the money.
Right.
Could I just see that 50 once more? Just kidding.
Hey, you on the crutches.
A buck a point.
I can't take this.
I think it'd be better if we give it to a worthy cause.
This is a lot of money.
Why did you need it in the first place? I wanted to take you white-water rafting.
That would have been great.
I guess I'll just have to make enough money so we can go.
Todd.
I'm talking about a part-time job.
I don't see him.
Told you he'd chicken out.
You were right.
What a wimp.
Geronimo! I'll make the papers, the 6:00 news (laughs) It'll be a movie of the week.
Where's the stadium? Where's the stadium?! Oh, Wakefield! Aah! Wakefield! (branches snap) Oh, jeez.
Oof! Mr.
Patman, nice of you to drop in.
Principal Cooper.
This is the last straw.
Everyone in Club X is getting detention.
Club X? What makes you think I'm in Club X? Look right down any crowded hall You see there's a beauty standing Is she really everywhere Or a reflection? Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High
What now? (beeps) (explosion) (girl) Jell-O.
Who's responsible for this? (both) Club X.
"Wiggle your way out of this one, Chrome Dome.
Sincerely, Club X.
" (sighs) I should've known.
Club X is really awesome.
Yeah.
I can't believe old Chrome Dome hasn't figured out who they are yet.
Any ideas? (boy) I don't think I've been this happy all year.
(bell rings) Beats me.
I'll see you later.
Nice job on Chrome Dome's car.
You've got the wrong guys, Jess.
We're not in Club X.
Very cute.
Where do I sign up? It's a guy thing, Jess.
They don't let in girls.
I guess that explains why you're not in it.
Ooh, that's gotta hurt.
Todd, where are you going? To play hoops at the park.
Now? But we were supposed to go Sorry.
This game's really important.
We'll talk later.
What's his problem? He promised he'd give me a ride to the shop, and he flaked.
Nice friend.
And every time I try to talk to him, he's got another game of one-on-one.
The guy wins a few games and all of a sudden he's too good to be my chauffeur.
What's the world coming to? Don't take it personally, Winston.
None of us want to be your chauffeur.
Oh.
Come on.
I'll take you.
Mr.
Cooper still upset about his car? Old news.
Club X released the biology frogs into the swimming pool.
That's disgusting.
I know.
Isn't it great? I've got to figure out a way to get into Club X.
Why? It's called "excitement," Liz.
You might want to try it sometime.
Hey, I bet that's from Club X.
Nothing gets by you, does it? Aren't you gonna open it? With you around? In seconds, everyone in school will know what it said.
Jessica, I'm your best friend.
I would never reveal any of your secrets.
I mean, I never told anyone about the time Jay Robertson stood you up, did I? (girl) Oh! (boy) What? Sorry.
Well, I'm going to be late for my weekly shiatsu.
Ciao.
What does Club X want with you? Let's see.
"Come to the warehouse at Millpoint "if you're man enough.
Sincerely, Club X.
" This is killer.
Jess, I think you should stay away from those guys.
Why? It'll be fun.
I can't wait to do something bad.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Sweet Valley will never be the same.
(creak) Who goes there? Halt.
You have trespassed into the domain of Club X.
Ooh.
Oogie-boogie.
I'm so scared.
(boy) Gosh.
I knew it was you, Bruce.
Brilliant, Wakefield.
How's it feel to use your brain for a change? Maybe someday you'll find out yourself, Bruce.
So, where do we start? First comes initiation.
You need to do something to prove you're up to Club X's standards.
I can do anything you can dream up.
So you want me to steal a car? Chilly feet, Wakefield? I hate to disappoint you, Bruce, but it looks like Club X is about to get its first female member.
I'll believe it when you drive away.
(Manny) Hey, man, stealing a car is illegal.
We could really get in trouble.
You mean she could really get in trouble.
Heads up.
Chrome Dome.
(engine starts) (Manny) Whoa, Bruce.
She just stole your car! (gears grind) Hey! That's a new clutch! Patman burned at his own game.
Looks like we found someone sneakier than you, Bruce.
Big mistake, Wakefield.
Are you Kurt Rambis from the Lakers? Yeah.
Can I have your autograph? Sure.
Who do you want me to make this out to? Mm Daddy.
OK.
There you go.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Here, let's see.
What did he put down? Elizabeth? I I thought you left an hour ago.
Me too, but my boyfriend hasn't shown.
Probably in the middle of another one-on-one game.
Can I give you a lift? Sure.
Hey, Todd.
Can't chat, Eggman.
Just grabbing a drink before my next victory.
I'm sure you've made enough money for that rafting trip with Liz by now.
I have.
But there's still a few more things I need new car stereo, some CDs, new high-tops Besides, I can't lose.
Why should I stop now? Because you've grown an ego the size of Alaska.
I have not.
You don't know what you're talking about.
Hey, Liz.
Don't you have something to say? What? You were supposed to pick me up from the charity center an hour ago.
I'm sorry.
I forgot.
It won't happen again.
Yeah.
I've heard that one before.
Yeah, Todd.
You've been blowing us off all week.
Hey, if you all have such a problem with the way I am, maybe you should just leave me alone.
It's like he's another person.
I think he needs some professional help.
Hmm.
I've got just the person in mind.
Welcome to Club X.
Thanks, Bruce.
Sorry about the scratch.
Right.
OK.
Here's how it works.
This is the wheel of misfortune.
Once we decide what we're gonna do next, we spin the wheel to see who carries it out.
If that person wimps out, they must submit to whatever punishment the club decides.
Sounds simple enough.
So what's the next prank? The new fountain.
Cooper unveils it tomorrow at a noontime ceremony.
We put a little soap in it, he looks like a fool in front of everyone.
Sounds like good, clean fun.
It's kinda easy, though.
Everything doesn't have to be brain surgery.
Now all we need is somebody to pull it off.
Your spin, Wakefield.
Jessica.
This must be your lucky day.
(bell rings) "and I want to express my gratitude" Principal Cooper.
Good morning.
Excellent speech.
I am inspired.
You like it? I was thinking of starting off with a joke.
You know the one about Yeah, I'm sure it's very funny.
By the way, I saw the new fountain.
Excellent work by the maintenance woman.
Thanks.
Wait.
We don't have a maintenance woman.
You! Stop.
Hold it right there.
Soap.
Figures.
Oh, I can't believe this.
Oh, man.
Hey, what gives? Whoa! Ohh! Whoa! (girl) Oh, that's gotta hurt.
(boy) Check it out.
Hi, Mr.
Cooper.
What happened to you? Did you see anybody running down this hallway? No, sorry.
I'd stay and help you look, but I'm off to the library.
(squishing) "Library?" Miss Wakefield.
Flash flood in homeroom, Miss Wakefield? Oh, that.
I You put your foot in it this time, young lady.
Mr.
Rambis.
Yeah? This is my friend Winston.
Hi, Winston.
Nice to meet you.
Oh, my God.
I can't believe this is really Kurt Rambis.
I mean, you-you won four World Championships.
Well, I had a little help.
OK.
Where would those guys be without you? You know, I like you, Winston.
That's good, because we need your help.
After all you've done for the charity - name it.
Well, it's about my boyfriend This is all your fault.
Rub it in, why don't you? Wait a minute.
A magnet.
You are true scum, Bruce.
Don't feel so bad.
You did lose to the best.
Yeah, right.
Well, if it isn't the great god Wilkins.
How's the air up on Olympus? Ha-ha.
Too good to speak to us mortals.
Sorry.
Just tell me one thing.
How come you haven't played me yet? You're kidding, right? I'd destroy you.
Kidding? Todd, when I'm through with you, there will be nothing but a sweaty headband.
They'll need a spatula to scrape you off the court.
Save yourself the humiliation, Eggman.
You're right, Todd.
Why risk it? You might ruin your winning streak.
What? OK, Winston.
You want me, you got me.
How much? Everything you've made so far.
No problem.
Plus 50 bucks, just to make it hurt.
Tomorrow, after school.
And bring your piggy bank.
Yes.
(voices outside) Well, look who's here.
Wakefield.
I thought you'd be home licking your wounds after your tango with old Chrome Dome.
He's already gonna give me detention.
Why not live it up a little? She's got a point.
Shall we get to work? There's a football game tomorrow at Municipal Stadium.
Let's say we spice up halftime.
How? One of us will run across the field wearing a ski mask, carrying a "Club X Rules" banner.
(boy) All right.
That's so lame.
Why don't we do something that'll get people's attention? I say the person skydives into the stadium with the banner.
(boy) Whoa! Unless you guys aren't up to it.
OK, Wakefield, skydive it is.
You sure? I mean, it's a great idea, but But what? Chicken? Then it's settled.
Bruce, why don't you spin? It'd be my pleasure.
Well, Wakefield, looks like you're gonna take a dive.
(Manny) Ooh, I'd look again.
Patman.
What? Remember, Bruce, it's not the fall that'll kill you, it's the landing.
You already tied that one, Winston.
My foot shrank.
Is he here? Not yet.
Don't worry.
Dude, if you pull this off, you'll be famous.
And the name Bruce Patman shall become legend.
As it rightfully should be.
Thank you so much, Jessica.
This was a brilliant idea.
To my plane.
Hey, good luck, man.
Hold on a second.
Aren't you going to witness this historical event, Wakefield? I'll catch up.
I just want to make sure your jump is confirmed.
Come on, you guys.
Hello, Coyote Skydiving? I'm calling for Mr.
Patman.
It seems we gave you the wrong drop coordinates.
15 buckets wins.
You start.
(boy) Check it out.
(boy #2) All right.
(Todd clears throat) That's one.
I am in trouble.
I have not yet begun to fight.
That's obvious.
Here, free shot.
Winston, are you OK? My ankle.
I think it's sprained.
Well, too bad, Eggman.
That's game, then.
Hand over the cash.
That's not fair.
He should at least get a replacement.
Replacement? (boy) Yeah.
Fine.
Pick anyone you want.
If you say so.
(boy) How about him? Perfect timing.
How about you? You could take over.
No, you could.
Look who I found.
Todd, I believe you've heard of Kurt Rambis.
Hi, Todd.
How you doing? Uh Kurt Rambis.
How did you You said anyone I could find.
I found him.
Oh, of course, if you're, uh if you're not up to it Oh, no, no.
I'm up to it.
All right.
See if you can stop this.
(laughter) OK, so you've got height.
But I've got speed, youth, agility I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.
You were saying? (laughter) Raise the stakes up higher Above the net where I can see You're gonna have to reach If you want to compete with me 'Cause I'm on top of the world Lookin' down upon your little head Yes, I'm on top of the world And I'm never comin' down again Come on and hit me with your best shot Come on and hit me with your best shot Your best shot, your best shot Whoo! (Kurt) Thanks for the game.
You put up a good fight.
Stick with it a few more years, and you might be able to take me.
Yeah, thanks.
No, I'm serious.
And besides, it is just a game.
Don't forget what's really important.
Bye, Liz.
See you, Winston.
OK.
See you later.
Thanks again, Mr.
Rambis.
No problem.
My pleasure.
I'll see you guys next week.
OK.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
Pay up, Wilkins.
Man.
I'm down 50 bucks.
That was harsh.
Did you have to completely humiliate me? Yes.
Was I really that bad? I guess I got all caught up in it.
I almost lost my two best friends.
Nothing is worth that.
I think you've learned your lesson.
Right, Winston? Winston.
Huh? Oh.
Yeah.
Bye, guys.
We don't care about the money.
Right.
Could I just see that 50 once more? Just kidding.
Hey, you on the crutches.
A buck a point.
I can't take this.
I think it'd be better if we give it to a worthy cause.
This is a lot of money.
Why did you need it in the first place? I wanted to take you white-water rafting.
That would have been great.
I guess I'll just have to make enough money so we can go.
Todd.
I'm talking about a part-time job.
I don't see him.
Told you he'd chicken out.
You were right.
What a wimp.
Geronimo! I'll make the papers, the 6:00 news (laughs) It'll be a movie of the week.
Where's the stadium? Where's the stadium?! Oh, Wakefield! Aah! Wakefield! (branches snap) Oh, jeez.
Oof! Mr.
Patman, nice of you to drop in.
Principal Cooper.
This is the last straw.
Everyone in Club X is getting detention.
Club X? What makes you think I'm in Club X? Look right down any crowded hall You see there's a beauty standing Is she really everywhere Or a reflection? Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High Meet you at Sweet Valley High