Hart of Dixie s01e14 Episode Script
Aliens & Aliases
Harley Wilkes was your father.
He left you his practice.
We are at your engagement party.
You know how difficult this is for me.
Difficult never stopped me.
LEMON: This needs to stop; I can't handle it.
I'm trying to move on, a-and you won't let me.
ZOE: Judson-- he broke up with me.
Yeah, I heard.
There was a town pool-- when y'all would break up-- and I had, I had 100 bucks on tonight.
(laughs) I was trying to get over someone, and I shouldn't have dated, but I wanted to because I liked you.
DIDI: No one knows what's gonna happen between two people.
Until yesterday I was having such a good time.
Good morning, Zoe Hart.
You, uh, want some coffee? I get it, you're probably trying to cut back on the caffeine.
You seemed a little wired recently, Doc.
What's that? Oh, corn flakes.
Yeah, oh, they do look good.
I'll have some, too.
I love me some corn flakes.
You do? You love corn flakes? I do, yeah.
Great.
Oops.
Oh, here, enjoy your breakfast.
So I take it you're still mad at me for the whole breaking you and Judson up thing? (giggles) So Agnes is baking us a bunch of sample wedding cakes.
She's going to bake us caramel chocolate cake, a chocolate sour cream cake.
Wait a minute, I thought you wanted lemon cake.
Honey, I know how much you like your chocolate.
You would give up your signature fruit for me? George Tucker, I'd give up anything for you.
(chuckles) Thank you.
Give me that-- no, I'm okay.
So, what are you doing today? Ooh, I am driving to Mobile to pick out fabrics for the bridesmaids' dresses, I'm meeting with the caterer, I'm going to reconfirm our block of rooms at the inn, and I'm gonna find Pete Terwilliger and get him to fix that wedding invitation typo.
Okay, okay, you know what? That-That's, that's way too much stuff.
Why don't, why don't you go ahead and save that for Saturday, and I can go with you? And, I don't know, you can take today off.
(laughs) I cannot take the day off.
Lemon, now that I know what you've been dealing with-- finding your mother with another family and I get why you've been stressed out, but, baby, let's face it, you need to blow off some steam, so I guess I can use a break.
So why don't you go ahead and give me that to-do list that I know you got in your ourse? (clears throat) Your list, the one in your purse.
I don't I know there's one in there.
That's weird, it's not there.
You got a list in there-- I know you do.
All right great, great.
Okay, as of right now the only thing on this list is to relax and have fun.
Yes, relax, have fun-- I can do that.
All right, I love you, babe.
Love you.
She's gonna blow.
Any minute.
It worked this morning.
Huh, mm.
Ain't that always the way? Something seems to be working perfectly, then all of a sudden, it's not.
One minute, you and the volcano are rock solid.
The next minute, the volcano won't even return your calls.
Okay, Lavon, so far today I have heard you compare Didi to a volcano, a bowl of grits, and Dash's pet cockatoo Pickles.
No, no, no, I said Didi wasn't like Pickles because Pickles knows how to use a damn phone.
I just don't get it.
Things were finally going well with me and Didi.
Then she runs out, won't return my calls.
Well, at least you didn't take your girl out line dancing, only to have her escape out the bathroom window.
And I'm a good dancer.
Joelle climbed out the bathroom window? When did that happen? Last night at Tricky Rick's.
Women-- why are they so confusing? What we need Hmm.
is some insight.
Zoe.
What, are you kidding me? She's the most confounding one of 'em all.
Still isn't talking to me just 'cause I put a little wager on her breaking up with, uh-- what's his name? Judson.
Yeah.
(Zoe clears throat) Hello, Lavon.
Lavon, I'll see you later.
Bye.
Listen, Zoe, I, I need a favor.
Anything.
Well, as you may know, uh, Didi and I had a romantic encounter after the Sweetie Pie dance.
Then, all of a sudden, she said she wasn't feeling well and she left.
Now she won't answer the phone.
Well, did you do something to make her angry? Can you find out for me? Well, you know, relationships aren't really my forte.
Just ask Judson.
Please.
For you, my best friend in BlueBell, I will try.
Ah, thank you.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I will take you to the Rammer Jammer tonight to thank you.
You take me to the Rammer Jammer almost every night.
Yes, but tonight I will let you pay.
Ooh.
MAN: Come experience the wonders of science.
Mr.
Sunberg.
George.
Hey.
Who are you today? Y-You-You're Copernicus.
(grunts) You're Galileo.
Hey, stick around, you might relearn something.
(George chuckles) Gather round, everyone, gather round, for I have a rather weighty subject that I'd like to discuss.
I am speaking, of course, about gravity.
Mr.
Sunberg, Dash Dewitt for the Blawker, BlueBell's number one online gossip site.
We did The Odd Couple together, Dash, I know who you are.
Right.
Well, I just have a few questions about this experiment that you and your wife are conducting later on tonight in the town square.
I understand that you're attempting to communicate with aliens.
Uh, that's really none of your business, Dash The experiment we're conducting is personal.
It doesn't concern you.
Oh, really? A teacher who believes he talks to aliens doesn't concern me? MR.
SUNBERG: Well, uh, my beliefs are not relevant.
If you're telling the aliens to touch down in BlueBell, I think the people have a right to know.
Look, Dash, I am not talking to the aliens.
They are talking to me! (crowd gasping and murmuring) Say what? (bell dings) I just can't believe it.
I mean, the man seriously thinks that aliens are really trying to talk to him.
Yeah, well, I can't say it surprises me.
Man's been two bricks short of a load ever since he married that crazy-pants wife of his.
Yeah.
Women sure do have a way of ruining things, don't they? I guess that depends on the woman.
Speaking of which Oh, hey, Joelle, you are looking lovely today.
I'll, uh, talk to you later, Wade.
What are you doing here, Joelle, looking for another window to climb out? I know you're mad, okay, but I had a real good reason for jumping out that window last night.
Oh, do tell.
I'm on the run.
From who? My ex-boyfriend Ed.
See, things didn't exactly end well between us, and I sort of set his lawn on fire.
You, you sort of set his lawn on fire? I didn't mean to, but, you know, with the dry season and all Anyway, Ed got his pal the sheriff to issue a warrant for my arrest, so I hightailed it to Georgia, which is where I'm supposed to be right now.
So why do you have to leave? 'Cause last night Ed came into Tricky Rick's, and I think he saw me, so now that he's on my trail again, he's not gonna stop till he finds me and puts me in jail.
I'm sorry, Wade.
I really thought we could have been something.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, now hold on a minute, hold on.
If he only caught a glimpse of you, he can't be sure what he saw, so all we got to do is find the guy and, uh, convince him it wasn't you.
Sweetie, you don't want to get mixed up in this.
Ed finds out you're involved with me and he will be all over you.
Trust me, okay, look, just, uh, just go back over to my place, hide out, and I'll figure this out.
Okay.
Okay.
Thanks, Wade.
All right.
Mmm.
Lemon is set on having dinner served, but then people got to wait for their food and there's not enough time for dancing.
Know what I mean? It's true, dancing is fun.
Yeah, but then, you know, if we have a buffet, then people-- they got, they got to wait in line, so People hate lines.
Yeah, they Oh, hey, Zoe, what are you doing here? Uh, well, since Addy and Brick are doing a mobile vaccine clinic, Tom Long is filling in at the reception desk.
(laughs) This has to be the highlight of his year.
That's exactly what he wrote in his e-mail to me.
Well, you are more than welcome to hide out here as long as you need to.
Thanks, pal, I appreciate the safe haven.
George, George, school board just fired me.
MRS.
SUNBERG: All the man did was tell the truth.
He is a vehicle for extraterrestrial contact.
MR.
SUNBERG: Don't worry, Dotty, George is gonna fix this.
Aren't you, George? Uh, y-yeah.
Yeah, I'm going to, I'm going to do my You know what? This is probably a talk we should have in my office.
It's always interesting around here.
You know what's interesting? This Kardashian sister.
Yep.
She finally connects with someone, thinks things are going great when suddenly he doesn't call her.
Poor Kardashian.
Actually, Khloe is very happily married, but I see your point.
Okay, I have to tell someone.
Yes, I'm ignoring Lavon, but you would, too, if you knew what I know.
Please don't tell me it's some weird, kinky sex thing.
It's worse.
I found this hidden under his desk.
(whispering): Under his desk? Hidden.
He told me recently that he's hung up on someone, and I think that someone is Lemon.
Shh.
What should I do? Should I tell George? That poor, sweet man is planning their wedding.
Wait, don't tell anyone anything, okay? I'm sure that there's a logical explanation for this.
I'm gonna find out what it is.
SELECTMAN: Look, I'd be perfectly willing to write the grant proposal myself, but time is running out.
Okay, okay, so we'll call an emergency session of the town council and have it approved.
I'm sure we can get that Lavon! Oh.
Hi, um, can I have a quick word? Zoe, I'm in a meeting.
It's important.
It's about that fruit problem we're having.
Our oranges, especially our Lemons.
Uh, I'll be right back.
What do you mean talking about lemons? Didi has been avoiding me because she found this hidden under your desk.
Oh, my God.
I forgot that was under there.
What was it doing there, Lavon? Please tell me it doesn't mean what I think it might.
Look, Zoe, just forget you saw this Forget? You have a picture of Lemon hidden in your office, which indicates more than a mayoral relationship.
And I don't hear any denials.
I-It's over.
(whispering): "It's over"? Wait, you mean, like, it was not over? It was a thing? You and Lemon? Oh, my God.
Does George know? (people chattering nearby) No.
And he can't know.
No one can ever know.
But Didi already does.
Mayor Mayor Hayes, we've got a deadline.
Right.
I'm-I'm sorry.
I'm coming.
All right.
Okay, l-look, Zoe, I'm I am gonna tell you everything, I want to tell you everything, but right now you have got to cover with Didi.
Please.
I can't just lie to her.
This gets out, it will hurt a whole lot of good people, myself included.
I'm sorry for putting you in this position, but you have got to keep this secret.
You don't know what you're asking me.
Zoe, as your friend, I'm begging you.
Please.
(sighs) Okay.
Thank you.
LAVON: Okay, uh (voice trails off) ERIC: Look, George, I know this may sound crazy, and I don't blame you for being a nonbeliever-- I was a nonbeliever before I met Dotty.
But a year ago, I convinced him to come to Roswell with me and participate in this experiment And the very next night I had a dream that I was taken up into space.
He thought he had a dream.
And then about a month later, I started having these episodes where I would lose control of my tongue, like somebody was trying to talk through me, and my arms would go numb.
It's like they're trying to talk to us in code.
Okay.
Have you considered a medical explanation? Of course.
I've been to Mobile, and I went to doctor after doctor, but no one could find the explanation as to what was happening with me.
Eric can't really be fired for his beliefs, can he? (sighs) If he kept them to himself, no, he couldn't be.
But unfortunately, he talked about them at an official school function.
George, you know what teaching means to me.
There has to be something you can do.
(phone rings) Hey, sweetheart.
Almost finished? I'm sorry to have to do this to you, baby, but I'm gonna have to cancel dinner tonight.
I've got to mount an entire defense to the school board for Eric Sunberg by 10:00 a.
m.
tomorrow morning.
Oh, it's okay.
Don't you worry about me.
Okay.
How's the day of fun going? So good.
I'm having the best time.
Ah.
Right.
What are you doing right now? Picking bridesmaids' fabrics.
Lemon! Oh, Lemon, I am disappointed, okay? You were supposed to be relaxing.
(groans) Fine, George, fine.
Next time you see me, I will be so relaxel, you'll just think that I've joined a reggae band.
So, did you talk to Lavon? I didn't need to.
Look, Didi, the truth is the picture's mine.
I-I took it from Lemon's house when I was trying to be a Belle.
Yours? Well, why didn't you say so in the first place? Because I was embarrassed.
Thank you.
I've been wanting to fit in to BlueBell, and I figured Lemon, queen of this town, was key.
And if I studied her-- the way she did her hair and how she dressed-- then maybe I could fit in, too.
You haven't done anything at all to be like her.
I tried.
In my house, by myself.
Then I realized it was futile, you know, because Lemon well, she's perfect, and I could never achieve that level of wonderfulness.
(nervous laugh) 'Cause, you know, she's so pretty with that blonde hair.
But why'd you hide the picture under Lavon's desk? Well I was looking at it, like I do, in Lavon's study when I thought I heard someone coming.
So I hid it.
Because, you know, I don't want anyone to know-- especially Lemon.
Because of what I said-- you know, she's so perfect, so pretty.
I think I get it.
This happened with my cousin Donna and her gym teacher.
And I am so glad you feel you could confide in me.
Thank you.
I'm just so relieved! Now things can finally get back to normal-- 'cause I didn't know how I was gonna keep working at that office knowing this terrible secret about George's fiancée.
Yeah, that would've been hard.
He's the sweetest man I've ever known.
Besides Lavon.
And I don't think I could've lived with myself had I kept it from him.
You know? Well, lucky for you, you don't have to.
Hey, you two.
Hey, George! You still hiding out from, uh, Tom? Yeah.
I should get back, though.
It was good to see you.
Good-bye.
Okay.
See ya.
Oh, yeah.
(giggles) YOGA TEACHER (on video): In Warrior pose.
No.
No, the seafood option should be local.
YOGA TEACHER (on video): Cartwheel down into Plank pose.
Ugh! Lemon, what is wrong with you? (grunts) It is just so great to finally see you in action.
Doing your doctor thing.
Just restocking the shelves.
Uh, yeah, well, you're doing it super awesomely.
(chuckles) You think I'm doing a good job? Well, yeah, sure, I guess.
You're answering the phones, and you got me that coffee that I wanted.
Oh oh, I forgot.
Uh, you missed a phone call from George Tucker a while ago.
What? What did you tell him? That you weren't here.
Oh, good.
That is good.
Whew! Always tell George that I'm not here, okay? Zoe Hart left the building.
Hey, Zoe? Um, this is this is Eric and Dotty Sunberg, and we have a little bit of a situation here.
The board refused to drop the charges, but I figure if I can prove that there's a medical explanation for it, I might be able to get him his job back.
I'll get a history on him and I'll run some tests.
Call you later.
Or better yet, e-mail.
I-I know Mr.
Sunberg can be a little bit kooky, but he made a major impact on my life.
So I just want to thank you for doing this.
I knew I could count on you.
You're a you're a really great friend.
You, too.
I'm sure that you have a ton of work to do, so I'll see you around.
Oh, don't worry about me-- I'm gonna be here until we find out what's wrong with him.
Okay.
The initial test results are in, and everything confirms what the doctors in Mobile found.
Mr.
Sunberg is perfectly healthy.
Even the mental evaluation didn't raise any flags.
Yeah, you see, George? No earthly explanation.
Am I the only one who just got chills? Dr.
Hart, can we have just a just a quick word? I'd rather we didn't.
What? What? Nothing.
So what's our next step here? I mean, CT scan or an MRI or? Well, he's already had all those tests done in Mobile.
Maybe you should consider that Mr.
Sunberg made the whole thing up.
Why would he make it up? Maybe the story makes him a celebrity at Star Trek conventions.
I don't know, George.
Sometimes people just lie.
Even the people we think we know and like.
(Eric mumbles) TOM: Th-Th-The aliens are talking.
(gasping and mumbling) Right pupil is nonreactive.
You can't fake nonreactive pupils.
So I guess he's not lying.
WADE: No, Joelle, you do not have to shave your head.
Or leave town.
Look, just let me figure this out, okay? Bartender? I will have a mint julep, please.
(chuckles) What? It's a perfectly respectable drink.
Yeah.
If you're a hundred.
Lemon what are you doing here, middle of the day? Shouldn't you be off, you know, bossing someone around somewhere? I took the day off.
Day off from what? Very funny.
(sighs) George made me.
"Relax, have fun," he said, you know? But I couldn't, Wade, I couldn't.
Lying there doing nothing just made my brain go into hyper-drive, and it just made me more stressed out than I already was.
(clears throat softly) Oh, I didn't order this.
Yeah, well, mint julep won't cure what ails you.
Lemon, you know how to have fun.
All you got to do is, you know let go.
Can't.
Turns out Lemon Breeland is just as anal and uptight as everyone thinks.
Well, then maybe you should stop being Lemon Breeland for a night.
LEMON: Wade.
Wade! Hmm? Wade! What? No one's ever gonna believe I'm Joelle.
(sighs) Look at me.
I am.
You look exactly like Joelle.
Damn, woman, you're hot! (laughs): Shut up.
I will not.
Come on, let's go.
Mmm! Rrr! Mmm! Hey, Zoe Didi came over and apologized.
We're back together.
Fantastic.
Hey, Zoe, um Oh.
Sorry, I didn't realize you had company.
Hey, Lavon.
I'll just (slaps thigh) And George-- you remember George, right? Sweetest man in town? Look, Zoe, um I'd like to tell you everything.
Can we please just take a walk and talk? I'm not in the mood to talk.
I've already lied to Didi, I'm lying to George.
You've put me in a terrible position.
Thanks, Lavon.
Thanks a lot.
Anything? Unfortunately, no.
Zoe, come on.
Hello! I brought snacks.
In honor of our Zoe's cultural heritage bagels! Or biscuits with the middle cut out.
Well, it looks delicious, Tom, thank you so much.
You really are a nice guy, aren't you? DOTTY: Honey, you should eat and drink something, too, what with all that blood they took.
Dotty, you got to get going if you're gonna conduct the experiment.
(sighs) I'll be back as soon as I get the data we need.
But drink your juice.
All right.
Mr.
Sunberg, do you drink juice often? I do.
May I? That tattoo, it's fading.
Where did you get it? Well, I got that on my wedding day.
We were down in this tiny town in Mexico.
You know, it seemed like the thing to do.
Actually kind of gives me a tough-guy rep with the kids, which is cool.
(chuckling) I have a feeling it may have given you more than that.
I think your tattoo may have given you lead poisoning.
(country music playing) Stop, stop, stop.
This is a bad idea.
We're gonna get found out.
We're gonna get ourselves killed.
Lemon, you've watched too many Patrick Swayze movies.
Now, you were the one who said you didn't want to be Lemon for a night.
Well, this is your chance.
Lemon, we're in Fairhope; nobody knows who you are.
They don't? You know, I don't like the sound of that.
I bet they've heard of me, okay? WADE: No.
Look, all we need to do is find this Ed guy, and then convince him that you were the one who was here with me last night, okay? Then you can go home and you can make lists and you can order people around or whatever it is that you do to have fun.
No, no, what, what Lemon, Lemon.
What? You are no longer uptight Lemon Breeland.
You are super fun Roxy Rumley.
Yeah, who apparently isn't scared of getting hepatitis.
Yo, Bobby, beer me.
Sure thing, Ed, my boy.
And, uh, we'll take two down here.
Hey, weren't you in here last night with a girl named Joelle? Well, you're right that I was here, uh, last night, but, uh But my sugar lips was with me.
Hm? And my name is Roxy.
Yes, it is.
Roxy.
Mm-hmm.
(chuckling) My mistake.
Y'all have a good night now.
It happens; take it easy.
Sugar lips? Oh, my God, just tried to think of, like, something I would never say in a million years, and "sugar lips" just kind of came right out.
It was just so spontaneous! Just so exciting.
The good news is, I think he bought it.
We can split.
Wait.
You know what else Lemon really would never do? I really don't want to know.
Shots with Wade Kinsella.
Bobby! Line them up! (giggles) The chelation challenge confirms it.
Lead poisoning.
You are so smart.
How did you know? Well, juice can have traces of lead.
For most people, it's no problem.
But for someone whose body is already filled with toxins from a lead tattoo, it can exacerbate the symptoms.
Say it again.
The good news is that lead poisoning is easily treatable, so, Mr.
Sunberg, you should be fine.
The good news for you is that lead can cause any number of neurological symptoms.
Like making you believe that you were being controlled by aliens.
Wait, what? Look, all we got to do is tell the school board that you had a medical condition.
And as long as you promise not to talk about UFOs and the like at any school functions, then we're gonna get you your job back.
So, you're telling me that there is no chance at all that my spells were caused by extraterrestrials? You are 100% alien-free.
Zoe, thank you so much.
Yeah.
(sighs) I'm gonna go get some dinner, and then I will be back in a while to check on you.
George, I'm sure you have to hurry off and go write some torts or briefs or something.
See you.
(door closes) (door opens) Hey, Zoe.
Hey, wait up.
(laughs) Hey! Jeez, I didn't realize how fast you walked with those little legs of yours.
Oh, you know us New Yorkers.
Hey, George, I got your Save the Date.
I'll see you there.
Oh.
Great.
I'll see you there.
So, your Save the Dates went out, huh? That's why you've been acting so strange today, isn't it? What? You didn't get a Save the Date.
Um, I am so sorry.
Oh, yeah, that's-that's why I've been weird.
Look, Zoe.
I really want you to know that I do consider you a friend.
It's just, the wedding, you know, is I just want that to be Lemon's special day.
I hope you understand.
So, you guys are doing well, then, huh? Yeah, we're doing great.
Actually, I mean, we had a rough patch after the holidays, but she finally told me about some things that had been going on.
Really? She told you some things? Yeah.
Yeah, she had, um some problems with her family.
And, you know, she'd been dealing with that, but then she finally decided to tell me, and now that she has, it's brought us a lot closer, you know, and being a lawyer, I see people split up all the time, you know, because they can't be open with their partners.
So, it feels good, to know that we're gonna walk down the aisle without a secret between us, you know? I'm really happy for you.
(phone ringing) Oh, sorry.
Wade.
Hi, Wade.
(clears throat) (sighs) Wait, who's-who's Roxy? Wait, what are you talking What? No, don't, just You just, you stay there.
You st I'll be right there! I'm sorry, I got to go.
Uh, we'll talk tomorrow? Yeah? Okay.
Okay.
(exhales) (sighs) (line ringing) This is George Tucker; please leave a message.
(beep) Hey, George, it's Zoe.
Can you call me when you have a chance? There's something I need to tell you.
(country music playing) Okay, you know, time to go.
Why? This is so fun.
I'm having so much fun.
Lemon, you're drunk, okay? Who's Lemon? My name is Roxy.
And Roxy wants one more dance.
You get one more dance, one more, and then we're leaving.
All right? Thank you, sugar lips.
Whatever.
How are you feeling? De-alienated.
Hey, can I ask you a favor? Sure.
Well, if my wife asks, don't tell her that it was the tattoo that gave me lead poisoning.
I don't have to tell her anything you don't want me to.
But why? I'm going to tell her that it was an extraterrestrial implantation device that gave me lead poisoning, and that you removed it and gave it to the authorities.
Why would you do that? Dr.
Hart, I know our beliefs may sound silly.
They sounded silly to me before I met Dotty.
And then she sold me.
Believing something else is out there-- it's what makes Dotty and me us.
We're happy.
So, if a little lie keeps us going, you know, who's to say that's wrong? You know, you should be real thankful you got Roxy and not Joelle.
'Cause that girl is crazy.
I was all set to propose and everything, and then she saw me talking to my female neighbor, talking, and that crazy girl set my clothes on fire.
But you got a keeper here, my friend.
To Roxy! To Roxy.
(laughing) Thank you, Lemon.
You were You went above and beyond.
You deserve better, you know.
What are you talking about? I'm talking about Joelle.
Burning a man's clothes 'cause she was jealous? Yeah, she's real classy with a K.
Well, thank you, uh, but you're drunk.
I am.
But drunk or not, Wade, I know you.
We were friends once, in high school.
I always thought that you'd rise above your upbringing and have a life as big as your heart.
I believe that you deserve better, even if you think you don't.
Oh, what? "Achy Breaky Heart" look out! Whoo! You have got to help me.
Okay? I cannot get her off the dance floor .
I bet.
And she's, no, she's gonna blow our cover.
George, just remember to call her Roxy.
Roxy, I got it.
Oh, Georgie! (giggles) Roxy, I think it's time about time to go home.
Let's just go, let's go.
Oh, come on.
Just do one dance with me.
Hey, everyone, this is my fiancé, George! Wait.
I thought she's with you.
Well, see that's an interesting question.
Uh, it's-it's a bit complicated.
Wait a minute.
You're George Tucker.
You defended my cousin last year for tax evasion.
Uh Yeah.
Nice to see you.
See, my fiancé-- he's a genius.
Okay? You should come to our wedding! Shouldn't he? I mean, y'all should come to our wedding.
What? Wedding? Yeah.
Oh, you lying son of a Okay, run! Run! Run! Run! Run! Come on, come on! Okay, look, you can tell whoever you want to, but please, first, let me explain.
I'm not sure I want to hear the sordid details, Lavon.
It wasn't sordid.
We were in love.
You were in love? At least I was.
It started around Christmas last year.
Lemon was going through a hard time, George was in New York, and I was just trying to be a good friend.
But then, something happened.
We just ran to each other like it was home.
We would, uh, just get in the car and just drive, no idea where we were going.
Sometimes we'd end up at the beach, sometimes the woods, sometimes some small town.
For the first and only time in my life I was in love, and, uh I saw a future with us together.
So, what happened? Six weeks in, George came home unexpectedly, and I was sure she was gonna tell him the truth, that things were over between them.
But she didn't.
He proposed, and she chose George instead of me.
I'm sorry.
And my heart broke.
(laughs) My God.
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, maybe, uh, she made the right decision.
I mean, they-they they seem happy together.
They do.
Okay, look, if you if you need to tell George the truth I'll understand.
Do whatever you think is right.
(sighs) (phone ringing) (sighs) Hello.
Hey, Zoe.
Um, sorry it took me so long to get back to you.
What was it you needed to tell me? Yeah, George, um If Mrs.
Sunberg asks, can you tell her the lead poisoning came from an alien implant? (laughs) Well, okay, then.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Okay.
Bye.
How'd it go? Did you find Ed? Yeah.
Yeah, I found him.
Had a nice little chat, too.
Tell me again why you, uh, why you burned his lawn? What did he tell you? Enough.
Look, Joelle, I I think maybe you ought to, uh, head back to Georgia after all.
You're breaking up with me? Yup.
Yeah, I am.
Just need a little less crazy in my life right now.
Crazy?! Um I'll show you crazy! Now, now, hold on.
That might not have been the word I was Whoa.
Whoa, whoa.
Do not Oh, my God.
You No.
No, do not smash that! Oh, I'm not gonna smash it.
Don't worry.
Put the lighter down.
JOELLE: Say good-bye! WADE: Lighter down! I'd love for you to try That's my favorite Don't you call me crazy! Maybe we should go help him? No, I think Wade can take care of himself.
(laughs) What about you? How you feeling? You need, uh you need aspirin? Mm, no, I feel great.
Oh.
Feel electric.
Oh.
Oh.
Okay.
(laughing) My God, it has been so long since I have just let loose like that.
I had no idea how much I needed it.
(sighs) Thank you.
Oh, no, don't thank me.
I just really simply said, uh, "Relax.
" I didn't say, "Get sloppy drunk and go dancing under a fake name at a roadhouse with Wade Kinsella.
" (laughs) Well, you know me.
I never do anything halfway.
Yeah.
Well, I guess, tomorrow, it's back to real life.
I guess so.
Well, I, for one, am not ready to say good-bye to Roxy Rumley just yet.
Hmm.
What are you thinking about? Well, why don't you follow me and find out? (giggles) Hey, Dr.
Hart! Thanks for all your help.
Too bad the Feds showed up so soon and took that device away.
I know.
Damn Feds! (door opens) Hey.
Hey.
You know, I realize that I can never presume to know what makes a couple tick.
Maybe George and Lemon will live happily ever after, and the secret will never come out.
All I know is, it's not my place to tell him.
I'm sorry I ever put you in this position.
You're in a tough position, too.
Yeah.
Can't be easy to see the two of them together.
No.
Do you still love her? Sometimes I think I might.
Sometimes I think I'm over it.
All I know-- I I'm just trying to move on.
(crickets chirping) (man and woman whooping and laughing) (woman giggling) (laughter) LEMON: Oh, this is the best day ever! (George laughs) I didn't think about anything.
I just was totally in the moment.
I just went where the day took me.
I wish every day could be like this.
Oh, George, we're not even 30 years old.
We have the whole world right in right in front of us.
Why don't we just be running hell-bent towards it? We shouldn't be sitting here, waiting and planning.
That's not life, George.
This is life.
You and me, right here, right now.
What are you saying? Let's elope.
(laughter) Really? Yeah.
(both laughing) (both whooping)
He left you his practice.
We are at your engagement party.
You know how difficult this is for me.
Difficult never stopped me.
LEMON: This needs to stop; I can't handle it.
I'm trying to move on, a-and you won't let me.
ZOE: Judson-- he broke up with me.
Yeah, I heard.
There was a town pool-- when y'all would break up-- and I had, I had 100 bucks on tonight.
(laughs) I was trying to get over someone, and I shouldn't have dated, but I wanted to because I liked you.
DIDI: No one knows what's gonna happen between two people.
Until yesterday I was having such a good time.
Good morning, Zoe Hart.
You, uh, want some coffee? I get it, you're probably trying to cut back on the caffeine.
You seemed a little wired recently, Doc.
What's that? Oh, corn flakes.
Yeah, oh, they do look good.
I'll have some, too.
I love me some corn flakes.
You do? You love corn flakes? I do, yeah.
Great.
Oops.
Oh, here, enjoy your breakfast.
So I take it you're still mad at me for the whole breaking you and Judson up thing? (giggles) So Agnes is baking us a bunch of sample wedding cakes.
She's going to bake us caramel chocolate cake, a chocolate sour cream cake.
Wait a minute, I thought you wanted lemon cake.
Honey, I know how much you like your chocolate.
You would give up your signature fruit for me? George Tucker, I'd give up anything for you.
(chuckles) Thank you.
Give me that-- no, I'm okay.
So, what are you doing today? Ooh, I am driving to Mobile to pick out fabrics for the bridesmaids' dresses, I'm meeting with the caterer, I'm going to reconfirm our block of rooms at the inn, and I'm gonna find Pete Terwilliger and get him to fix that wedding invitation typo.
Okay, okay, you know what? That-That's, that's way too much stuff.
Why don't, why don't you go ahead and save that for Saturday, and I can go with you? And, I don't know, you can take today off.
(laughs) I cannot take the day off.
Lemon, now that I know what you've been dealing with-- finding your mother with another family and I get why you've been stressed out, but, baby, let's face it, you need to blow off some steam, so I guess I can use a break.
So why don't you go ahead and give me that to-do list that I know you got in your ourse? (clears throat) Your list, the one in your purse.
I don't I know there's one in there.
That's weird, it's not there.
You got a list in there-- I know you do.
All right great, great.
Okay, as of right now the only thing on this list is to relax and have fun.
Yes, relax, have fun-- I can do that.
All right, I love you, babe.
Love you.
She's gonna blow.
Any minute.
It worked this morning.
Huh, mm.
Ain't that always the way? Something seems to be working perfectly, then all of a sudden, it's not.
One minute, you and the volcano are rock solid.
The next minute, the volcano won't even return your calls.
Okay, Lavon, so far today I have heard you compare Didi to a volcano, a bowl of grits, and Dash's pet cockatoo Pickles.
No, no, no, I said Didi wasn't like Pickles because Pickles knows how to use a damn phone.
I just don't get it.
Things were finally going well with me and Didi.
Then she runs out, won't return my calls.
Well, at least you didn't take your girl out line dancing, only to have her escape out the bathroom window.
And I'm a good dancer.
Joelle climbed out the bathroom window? When did that happen? Last night at Tricky Rick's.
Women-- why are they so confusing? What we need Hmm.
is some insight.
Zoe.
What, are you kidding me? She's the most confounding one of 'em all.
Still isn't talking to me just 'cause I put a little wager on her breaking up with, uh-- what's his name? Judson.
Yeah.
(Zoe clears throat) Hello, Lavon.
Lavon, I'll see you later.
Bye.
Listen, Zoe, I, I need a favor.
Anything.
Well, as you may know, uh, Didi and I had a romantic encounter after the Sweetie Pie dance.
Then, all of a sudden, she said she wasn't feeling well and she left.
Now she won't answer the phone.
Well, did you do something to make her angry? Can you find out for me? Well, you know, relationships aren't really my forte.
Just ask Judson.
Please.
For you, my best friend in BlueBell, I will try.
Ah, thank you.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I will take you to the Rammer Jammer tonight to thank you.
You take me to the Rammer Jammer almost every night.
Yes, but tonight I will let you pay.
Ooh.
MAN: Come experience the wonders of science.
Mr.
Sunberg.
George.
Hey.
Who are you today? Y-You-You're Copernicus.
(grunts) You're Galileo.
Hey, stick around, you might relearn something.
(George chuckles) Gather round, everyone, gather round, for I have a rather weighty subject that I'd like to discuss.
I am speaking, of course, about gravity.
Mr.
Sunberg, Dash Dewitt for the Blawker, BlueBell's number one online gossip site.
We did The Odd Couple together, Dash, I know who you are.
Right.
Well, I just have a few questions about this experiment that you and your wife are conducting later on tonight in the town square.
I understand that you're attempting to communicate with aliens.
Uh, that's really none of your business, Dash The experiment we're conducting is personal.
It doesn't concern you.
Oh, really? A teacher who believes he talks to aliens doesn't concern me? MR.
SUNBERG: Well, uh, my beliefs are not relevant.
If you're telling the aliens to touch down in BlueBell, I think the people have a right to know.
Look, Dash, I am not talking to the aliens.
They are talking to me! (crowd gasping and murmuring) Say what? (bell dings) I just can't believe it.
I mean, the man seriously thinks that aliens are really trying to talk to him.
Yeah, well, I can't say it surprises me.
Man's been two bricks short of a load ever since he married that crazy-pants wife of his.
Yeah.
Women sure do have a way of ruining things, don't they? I guess that depends on the woman.
Speaking of which Oh, hey, Joelle, you are looking lovely today.
I'll, uh, talk to you later, Wade.
What are you doing here, Joelle, looking for another window to climb out? I know you're mad, okay, but I had a real good reason for jumping out that window last night.
Oh, do tell.
I'm on the run.
From who? My ex-boyfriend Ed.
See, things didn't exactly end well between us, and I sort of set his lawn on fire.
You, you sort of set his lawn on fire? I didn't mean to, but, you know, with the dry season and all Anyway, Ed got his pal the sheriff to issue a warrant for my arrest, so I hightailed it to Georgia, which is where I'm supposed to be right now.
So why do you have to leave? 'Cause last night Ed came into Tricky Rick's, and I think he saw me, so now that he's on my trail again, he's not gonna stop till he finds me and puts me in jail.
I'm sorry, Wade.
I really thought we could have been something.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, now hold on a minute, hold on.
If he only caught a glimpse of you, he can't be sure what he saw, so all we got to do is find the guy and, uh, convince him it wasn't you.
Sweetie, you don't want to get mixed up in this.
Ed finds out you're involved with me and he will be all over you.
Trust me, okay, look, just, uh, just go back over to my place, hide out, and I'll figure this out.
Okay.
Okay.
Thanks, Wade.
All right.
Mmm.
Lemon is set on having dinner served, but then people got to wait for their food and there's not enough time for dancing.
Know what I mean? It's true, dancing is fun.
Yeah, but then, you know, if we have a buffet, then people-- they got, they got to wait in line, so People hate lines.
Yeah, they Oh, hey, Zoe, what are you doing here? Uh, well, since Addy and Brick are doing a mobile vaccine clinic, Tom Long is filling in at the reception desk.
(laughs) This has to be the highlight of his year.
That's exactly what he wrote in his e-mail to me.
Well, you are more than welcome to hide out here as long as you need to.
Thanks, pal, I appreciate the safe haven.
George, George, school board just fired me.
MRS.
SUNBERG: All the man did was tell the truth.
He is a vehicle for extraterrestrial contact.
MR.
SUNBERG: Don't worry, Dotty, George is gonna fix this.
Aren't you, George? Uh, y-yeah.
Yeah, I'm going to, I'm going to do my You know what? This is probably a talk we should have in my office.
It's always interesting around here.
You know what's interesting? This Kardashian sister.
Yep.
She finally connects with someone, thinks things are going great when suddenly he doesn't call her.
Poor Kardashian.
Actually, Khloe is very happily married, but I see your point.
Okay, I have to tell someone.
Yes, I'm ignoring Lavon, but you would, too, if you knew what I know.
Please don't tell me it's some weird, kinky sex thing.
It's worse.
I found this hidden under his desk.
(whispering): Under his desk? Hidden.
He told me recently that he's hung up on someone, and I think that someone is Lemon.
Shh.
What should I do? Should I tell George? That poor, sweet man is planning their wedding.
Wait, don't tell anyone anything, okay? I'm sure that there's a logical explanation for this.
I'm gonna find out what it is.
SELECTMAN: Look, I'd be perfectly willing to write the grant proposal myself, but time is running out.
Okay, okay, so we'll call an emergency session of the town council and have it approved.
I'm sure we can get that Lavon! Oh.
Hi, um, can I have a quick word? Zoe, I'm in a meeting.
It's important.
It's about that fruit problem we're having.
Our oranges, especially our Lemons.
Uh, I'll be right back.
What do you mean talking about lemons? Didi has been avoiding me because she found this hidden under your desk.
Oh, my God.
I forgot that was under there.
What was it doing there, Lavon? Please tell me it doesn't mean what I think it might.
Look, Zoe, just forget you saw this Forget? You have a picture of Lemon hidden in your office, which indicates more than a mayoral relationship.
And I don't hear any denials.
I-It's over.
(whispering): "It's over"? Wait, you mean, like, it was not over? It was a thing? You and Lemon? Oh, my God.
Does George know? (people chattering nearby) No.
And he can't know.
No one can ever know.
But Didi already does.
Mayor Mayor Hayes, we've got a deadline.
Right.
I'm-I'm sorry.
I'm coming.
All right.
Okay, l-look, Zoe, I'm I am gonna tell you everything, I want to tell you everything, but right now you have got to cover with Didi.
Please.
I can't just lie to her.
This gets out, it will hurt a whole lot of good people, myself included.
I'm sorry for putting you in this position, but you have got to keep this secret.
You don't know what you're asking me.
Zoe, as your friend, I'm begging you.
Please.
(sighs) Okay.
Thank you.
LAVON: Okay, uh (voice trails off) ERIC: Look, George, I know this may sound crazy, and I don't blame you for being a nonbeliever-- I was a nonbeliever before I met Dotty.
But a year ago, I convinced him to come to Roswell with me and participate in this experiment And the very next night I had a dream that I was taken up into space.
He thought he had a dream.
And then about a month later, I started having these episodes where I would lose control of my tongue, like somebody was trying to talk through me, and my arms would go numb.
It's like they're trying to talk to us in code.
Okay.
Have you considered a medical explanation? Of course.
I've been to Mobile, and I went to doctor after doctor, but no one could find the explanation as to what was happening with me.
Eric can't really be fired for his beliefs, can he? (sighs) If he kept them to himself, no, he couldn't be.
But unfortunately, he talked about them at an official school function.
George, you know what teaching means to me.
There has to be something you can do.
(phone rings) Hey, sweetheart.
Almost finished? I'm sorry to have to do this to you, baby, but I'm gonna have to cancel dinner tonight.
I've got to mount an entire defense to the school board for Eric Sunberg by 10:00 a.
m.
tomorrow morning.
Oh, it's okay.
Don't you worry about me.
Okay.
How's the day of fun going? So good.
I'm having the best time.
Ah.
Right.
What are you doing right now? Picking bridesmaids' fabrics.
Lemon! Oh, Lemon, I am disappointed, okay? You were supposed to be relaxing.
(groans) Fine, George, fine.
Next time you see me, I will be so relaxel, you'll just think that I've joined a reggae band.
So, did you talk to Lavon? I didn't need to.
Look, Didi, the truth is the picture's mine.
I-I took it from Lemon's house when I was trying to be a Belle.
Yours? Well, why didn't you say so in the first place? Because I was embarrassed.
Thank you.
I've been wanting to fit in to BlueBell, and I figured Lemon, queen of this town, was key.
And if I studied her-- the way she did her hair and how she dressed-- then maybe I could fit in, too.
You haven't done anything at all to be like her.
I tried.
In my house, by myself.
Then I realized it was futile, you know, because Lemon well, she's perfect, and I could never achieve that level of wonderfulness.
(nervous laugh) 'Cause, you know, she's so pretty with that blonde hair.
But why'd you hide the picture under Lavon's desk? Well I was looking at it, like I do, in Lavon's study when I thought I heard someone coming.
So I hid it.
Because, you know, I don't want anyone to know-- especially Lemon.
Because of what I said-- you know, she's so perfect, so pretty.
I think I get it.
This happened with my cousin Donna and her gym teacher.
And I am so glad you feel you could confide in me.
Thank you.
I'm just so relieved! Now things can finally get back to normal-- 'cause I didn't know how I was gonna keep working at that office knowing this terrible secret about George's fiancée.
Yeah, that would've been hard.
He's the sweetest man I've ever known.
Besides Lavon.
And I don't think I could've lived with myself had I kept it from him.
You know? Well, lucky for you, you don't have to.
Hey, you two.
Hey, George! You still hiding out from, uh, Tom? Yeah.
I should get back, though.
It was good to see you.
Good-bye.
Okay.
See ya.
Oh, yeah.
(giggles) YOGA TEACHER (on video): In Warrior pose.
No.
No, the seafood option should be local.
YOGA TEACHER (on video): Cartwheel down into Plank pose.
Ugh! Lemon, what is wrong with you? (grunts) It is just so great to finally see you in action.
Doing your doctor thing.
Just restocking the shelves.
Uh, yeah, well, you're doing it super awesomely.
(chuckles) You think I'm doing a good job? Well, yeah, sure, I guess.
You're answering the phones, and you got me that coffee that I wanted.
Oh oh, I forgot.
Uh, you missed a phone call from George Tucker a while ago.
What? What did you tell him? That you weren't here.
Oh, good.
That is good.
Whew! Always tell George that I'm not here, okay? Zoe Hart left the building.
Hey, Zoe? Um, this is this is Eric and Dotty Sunberg, and we have a little bit of a situation here.
The board refused to drop the charges, but I figure if I can prove that there's a medical explanation for it, I might be able to get him his job back.
I'll get a history on him and I'll run some tests.
Call you later.
Or better yet, e-mail.
I-I know Mr.
Sunberg can be a little bit kooky, but he made a major impact on my life.
So I just want to thank you for doing this.
I knew I could count on you.
You're a you're a really great friend.
You, too.
I'm sure that you have a ton of work to do, so I'll see you around.
Oh, don't worry about me-- I'm gonna be here until we find out what's wrong with him.
Okay.
The initial test results are in, and everything confirms what the doctors in Mobile found.
Mr.
Sunberg is perfectly healthy.
Even the mental evaluation didn't raise any flags.
Yeah, you see, George? No earthly explanation.
Am I the only one who just got chills? Dr.
Hart, can we have just a just a quick word? I'd rather we didn't.
What? What? Nothing.
So what's our next step here? I mean, CT scan or an MRI or? Well, he's already had all those tests done in Mobile.
Maybe you should consider that Mr.
Sunberg made the whole thing up.
Why would he make it up? Maybe the story makes him a celebrity at Star Trek conventions.
I don't know, George.
Sometimes people just lie.
Even the people we think we know and like.
(Eric mumbles) TOM: Th-Th-The aliens are talking.
(gasping and mumbling) Right pupil is nonreactive.
You can't fake nonreactive pupils.
So I guess he's not lying.
WADE: No, Joelle, you do not have to shave your head.
Or leave town.
Look, just let me figure this out, okay? Bartender? I will have a mint julep, please.
(chuckles) What? It's a perfectly respectable drink.
Yeah.
If you're a hundred.
Lemon what are you doing here, middle of the day? Shouldn't you be off, you know, bossing someone around somewhere? I took the day off.
Day off from what? Very funny.
(sighs) George made me.
"Relax, have fun," he said, you know? But I couldn't, Wade, I couldn't.
Lying there doing nothing just made my brain go into hyper-drive, and it just made me more stressed out than I already was.
(clears throat softly) Oh, I didn't order this.
Yeah, well, mint julep won't cure what ails you.
Lemon, you know how to have fun.
All you got to do is, you know let go.
Can't.
Turns out Lemon Breeland is just as anal and uptight as everyone thinks.
Well, then maybe you should stop being Lemon Breeland for a night.
LEMON: Wade.
Wade! Hmm? Wade! What? No one's ever gonna believe I'm Joelle.
(sighs) Look at me.
I am.
You look exactly like Joelle.
Damn, woman, you're hot! (laughs): Shut up.
I will not.
Come on, let's go.
Mmm! Rrr! Mmm! Hey, Zoe Didi came over and apologized.
We're back together.
Fantastic.
Hey, Zoe, um Oh.
Sorry, I didn't realize you had company.
Hey, Lavon.
I'll just (slaps thigh) And George-- you remember George, right? Sweetest man in town? Look, Zoe, um I'd like to tell you everything.
Can we please just take a walk and talk? I'm not in the mood to talk.
I've already lied to Didi, I'm lying to George.
You've put me in a terrible position.
Thanks, Lavon.
Thanks a lot.
Anything? Unfortunately, no.
Zoe, come on.
Hello! I brought snacks.
In honor of our Zoe's cultural heritage bagels! Or biscuits with the middle cut out.
Well, it looks delicious, Tom, thank you so much.
You really are a nice guy, aren't you? DOTTY: Honey, you should eat and drink something, too, what with all that blood they took.
Dotty, you got to get going if you're gonna conduct the experiment.
(sighs) I'll be back as soon as I get the data we need.
But drink your juice.
All right.
Mr.
Sunberg, do you drink juice often? I do.
May I? That tattoo, it's fading.
Where did you get it? Well, I got that on my wedding day.
We were down in this tiny town in Mexico.
You know, it seemed like the thing to do.
Actually kind of gives me a tough-guy rep with the kids, which is cool.
(chuckling) I have a feeling it may have given you more than that.
I think your tattoo may have given you lead poisoning.
(country music playing) Stop, stop, stop.
This is a bad idea.
We're gonna get found out.
We're gonna get ourselves killed.
Lemon, you've watched too many Patrick Swayze movies.
Now, you were the one who said you didn't want to be Lemon for a night.
Well, this is your chance.
Lemon, we're in Fairhope; nobody knows who you are.
They don't? You know, I don't like the sound of that.
I bet they've heard of me, okay? WADE: No.
Look, all we need to do is find this Ed guy, and then convince him that you were the one who was here with me last night, okay? Then you can go home and you can make lists and you can order people around or whatever it is that you do to have fun.
No, no, what, what Lemon, Lemon.
What? You are no longer uptight Lemon Breeland.
You are super fun Roxy Rumley.
Yeah, who apparently isn't scared of getting hepatitis.
Yo, Bobby, beer me.
Sure thing, Ed, my boy.
And, uh, we'll take two down here.
Hey, weren't you in here last night with a girl named Joelle? Well, you're right that I was here, uh, last night, but, uh But my sugar lips was with me.
Hm? And my name is Roxy.
Yes, it is.
Roxy.
Mm-hmm.
(chuckling) My mistake.
Y'all have a good night now.
It happens; take it easy.
Sugar lips? Oh, my God, just tried to think of, like, something I would never say in a million years, and "sugar lips" just kind of came right out.
It was just so spontaneous! Just so exciting.
The good news is, I think he bought it.
We can split.
Wait.
You know what else Lemon really would never do? I really don't want to know.
Shots with Wade Kinsella.
Bobby! Line them up! (giggles) The chelation challenge confirms it.
Lead poisoning.
You are so smart.
How did you know? Well, juice can have traces of lead.
For most people, it's no problem.
But for someone whose body is already filled with toxins from a lead tattoo, it can exacerbate the symptoms.
Say it again.
The good news is that lead poisoning is easily treatable, so, Mr.
Sunberg, you should be fine.
The good news for you is that lead can cause any number of neurological symptoms.
Like making you believe that you were being controlled by aliens.
Wait, what? Look, all we got to do is tell the school board that you had a medical condition.
And as long as you promise not to talk about UFOs and the like at any school functions, then we're gonna get you your job back.
So, you're telling me that there is no chance at all that my spells were caused by extraterrestrials? You are 100% alien-free.
Zoe, thank you so much.
Yeah.
(sighs) I'm gonna go get some dinner, and then I will be back in a while to check on you.
George, I'm sure you have to hurry off and go write some torts or briefs or something.
See you.
(door closes) (door opens) Hey, Zoe.
Hey, wait up.
(laughs) Hey! Jeez, I didn't realize how fast you walked with those little legs of yours.
Oh, you know us New Yorkers.
Hey, George, I got your Save the Date.
I'll see you there.
Oh.
Great.
I'll see you there.
So, your Save the Dates went out, huh? That's why you've been acting so strange today, isn't it? What? You didn't get a Save the Date.
Um, I am so sorry.
Oh, yeah, that's-that's why I've been weird.
Look, Zoe.
I really want you to know that I do consider you a friend.
It's just, the wedding, you know, is I just want that to be Lemon's special day.
I hope you understand.
So, you guys are doing well, then, huh? Yeah, we're doing great.
Actually, I mean, we had a rough patch after the holidays, but she finally told me about some things that had been going on.
Really? She told you some things? Yeah.
Yeah, she had, um some problems with her family.
And, you know, she'd been dealing with that, but then she finally decided to tell me, and now that she has, it's brought us a lot closer, you know, and being a lawyer, I see people split up all the time, you know, because they can't be open with their partners.
So, it feels good, to know that we're gonna walk down the aisle without a secret between us, you know? I'm really happy for you.
(phone ringing) Oh, sorry.
Wade.
Hi, Wade.
(clears throat) (sighs) Wait, who's-who's Roxy? Wait, what are you talking What? No, don't, just You just, you stay there.
You st I'll be right there! I'm sorry, I got to go.
Uh, we'll talk tomorrow? Yeah? Okay.
Okay.
(exhales) (sighs) (line ringing) This is George Tucker; please leave a message.
(beep) Hey, George, it's Zoe.
Can you call me when you have a chance? There's something I need to tell you.
(country music playing) Okay, you know, time to go.
Why? This is so fun.
I'm having so much fun.
Lemon, you're drunk, okay? Who's Lemon? My name is Roxy.
And Roxy wants one more dance.
You get one more dance, one more, and then we're leaving.
All right? Thank you, sugar lips.
Whatever.
How are you feeling? De-alienated.
Hey, can I ask you a favor? Sure.
Well, if my wife asks, don't tell her that it was the tattoo that gave me lead poisoning.
I don't have to tell her anything you don't want me to.
But why? I'm going to tell her that it was an extraterrestrial implantation device that gave me lead poisoning, and that you removed it and gave it to the authorities.
Why would you do that? Dr.
Hart, I know our beliefs may sound silly.
They sounded silly to me before I met Dotty.
And then she sold me.
Believing something else is out there-- it's what makes Dotty and me us.
We're happy.
So, if a little lie keeps us going, you know, who's to say that's wrong? You know, you should be real thankful you got Roxy and not Joelle.
'Cause that girl is crazy.
I was all set to propose and everything, and then she saw me talking to my female neighbor, talking, and that crazy girl set my clothes on fire.
But you got a keeper here, my friend.
To Roxy! To Roxy.
(laughing) Thank you, Lemon.
You were You went above and beyond.
You deserve better, you know.
What are you talking about? I'm talking about Joelle.
Burning a man's clothes 'cause she was jealous? Yeah, she's real classy with a K.
Well, thank you, uh, but you're drunk.
I am.
But drunk or not, Wade, I know you.
We were friends once, in high school.
I always thought that you'd rise above your upbringing and have a life as big as your heart.
I believe that you deserve better, even if you think you don't.
Oh, what? "Achy Breaky Heart" look out! Whoo! You have got to help me.
Okay? I cannot get her off the dance floor .
I bet.
And she's, no, she's gonna blow our cover.
George, just remember to call her Roxy.
Roxy, I got it.
Oh, Georgie! (giggles) Roxy, I think it's time about time to go home.
Let's just go, let's go.
Oh, come on.
Just do one dance with me.
Hey, everyone, this is my fiancé, George! Wait.
I thought she's with you.
Well, see that's an interesting question.
Uh, it's-it's a bit complicated.
Wait a minute.
You're George Tucker.
You defended my cousin last year for tax evasion.
Uh Yeah.
Nice to see you.
See, my fiancé-- he's a genius.
Okay? You should come to our wedding! Shouldn't he? I mean, y'all should come to our wedding.
What? Wedding? Yeah.
Oh, you lying son of a Okay, run! Run! Run! Run! Run! Come on, come on! Okay, look, you can tell whoever you want to, but please, first, let me explain.
I'm not sure I want to hear the sordid details, Lavon.
It wasn't sordid.
We were in love.
You were in love? At least I was.
It started around Christmas last year.
Lemon was going through a hard time, George was in New York, and I was just trying to be a good friend.
But then, something happened.
We just ran to each other like it was home.
We would, uh, just get in the car and just drive, no idea where we were going.
Sometimes we'd end up at the beach, sometimes the woods, sometimes some small town.
For the first and only time in my life I was in love, and, uh I saw a future with us together.
So, what happened? Six weeks in, George came home unexpectedly, and I was sure she was gonna tell him the truth, that things were over between them.
But she didn't.
He proposed, and she chose George instead of me.
I'm sorry.
And my heart broke.
(laughs) My God.
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, maybe, uh, she made the right decision.
I mean, they-they they seem happy together.
They do.
Okay, look, if you if you need to tell George the truth I'll understand.
Do whatever you think is right.
(sighs) (phone ringing) (sighs) Hello.
Hey, Zoe.
Um, sorry it took me so long to get back to you.
What was it you needed to tell me? Yeah, George, um If Mrs.
Sunberg asks, can you tell her the lead poisoning came from an alien implant? (laughs) Well, okay, then.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Okay.
Bye.
How'd it go? Did you find Ed? Yeah.
Yeah, I found him.
Had a nice little chat, too.
Tell me again why you, uh, why you burned his lawn? What did he tell you? Enough.
Look, Joelle, I I think maybe you ought to, uh, head back to Georgia after all.
You're breaking up with me? Yup.
Yeah, I am.
Just need a little less crazy in my life right now.
Crazy?! Um I'll show you crazy! Now, now, hold on.
That might not have been the word I was Whoa.
Whoa, whoa.
Do not Oh, my God.
You No.
No, do not smash that! Oh, I'm not gonna smash it.
Don't worry.
Put the lighter down.
JOELLE: Say good-bye! WADE: Lighter down! I'd love for you to try That's my favorite Don't you call me crazy! Maybe we should go help him? No, I think Wade can take care of himself.
(laughs) What about you? How you feeling? You need, uh you need aspirin? Mm, no, I feel great.
Oh.
Feel electric.
Oh.
Oh.
Okay.
(laughing) My God, it has been so long since I have just let loose like that.
I had no idea how much I needed it.
(sighs) Thank you.
Oh, no, don't thank me.
I just really simply said, uh, "Relax.
" I didn't say, "Get sloppy drunk and go dancing under a fake name at a roadhouse with Wade Kinsella.
" (laughs) Well, you know me.
I never do anything halfway.
Yeah.
Well, I guess, tomorrow, it's back to real life.
I guess so.
Well, I, for one, am not ready to say good-bye to Roxy Rumley just yet.
Hmm.
What are you thinking about? Well, why don't you follow me and find out? (giggles) Hey, Dr.
Hart! Thanks for all your help.
Too bad the Feds showed up so soon and took that device away.
I know.
Damn Feds! (door opens) Hey.
Hey.
You know, I realize that I can never presume to know what makes a couple tick.
Maybe George and Lemon will live happily ever after, and the secret will never come out.
All I know is, it's not my place to tell him.
I'm sorry I ever put you in this position.
You're in a tough position, too.
Yeah.
Can't be easy to see the two of them together.
No.
Do you still love her? Sometimes I think I might.
Sometimes I think I'm over it.
All I know-- I I'm just trying to move on.
(crickets chirping) (man and woman whooping and laughing) (woman giggling) (laughter) LEMON: Oh, this is the best day ever! (George laughs) I didn't think about anything.
I just was totally in the moment.
I just went where the day took me.
I wish every day could be like this.
Oh, George, we're not even 30 years old.
We have the whole world right in right in front of us.
Why don't we just be running hell-bent towards it? We shouldn't be sitting here, waiting and planning.
That's not life, George.
This is life.
You and me, right here, right now.
What are you saying? Let's elope.
(laughter) Really? Yeah.
(both laughing) (both whooping)