The Lost World (1999) s01e14 Episode Script

Camelot

Not bad.
The lady in the lake.
Hey you're supposed to be keeping an eye out for crocodiles.
I am.
No! Remove your covering.
I beg your pardon? Show yourself to me.
I think you've already seen more than your fair share.
- You are not dismissed.
- Hey! first lesson little boy.
No, means no.
You struck me.
A transgression of the gravest order, as I will bare witness your highness.
- Highness? - You've got to be kidding.
No woman may touch King Gawain.
Kill her.
Wait! There is one woman who may touch the King.
But your highness.
His betrothed.
As in marriage? Sire I do not think it wise.
I'm with tall dark and moody here.
As far as husbands go I've always had something a little larger in mind.
Then die you must.
On the other hand, I've always hoped to be a June bride.
What about the dowry sire? Veronica, why don't go back to the treehouse and get the dowry and bring as many of them as you can.
Got it.
Do you know the meadow by the stream? I will send a guide to escort you from there if you are not back at our camp by nightfall.
Don't worry, I'll be there.
At the dawn of the century A band of adventures set out to prove the impossible The existence of a prehistoric world The Visionary The Heiress The Hunter The Scientist and The Reporter All chasing the story of a lifetime Stranded in a savage land Befriended by an untamed beauty Together they fight to survive In this amazing world of lost civilizations and terrifying creatures Always searching for a way home A way out of the Lost World Back so early? Put your boots on boys, we're going to a wedding.
Who ever would have thought I would be putting together Marguerite's dowry hmmm? Well, well, well.
Ah yes always a safe wedding gift.
Likewise for this.
Oh I know it must be somewhere in here.
Whoa, that's Marguerite's jewelry.
I know.
She'll have a fit.
How often does a lady get married? Yes well, her wedding your funeral.
After we're married, I'll throw a grand ball in your honor at the castle.
Castle? This is just my hunting camp, my kingdom lies many days journey away.
- You know your highness - You may call me by my given name Gawain.
Okay, Gawain about this grand ball.
It's not that I don't think you're cute, handsome I mean.
But can you really see the two of us.
- I mean I'm old enough to be your - Mother? Sister is more what I had in mind.
Vordred! My King.
I am to be married am I not? Indeed.
A grand and glorious celebration foretold in legend? Most assuredly.
Then why are we not flying the royal flags as I commanded? Ah, alas sire, your knights have reported ape-men approaching on our territory.
Headhunters have been sited to the East and well would there were more hours in the day.
You have one hour.
As you command.
So hard to get good help these days.
Okay - let's try this once again from the top.
You have a very beautiful body.
How old did you say you were? Lovely eyes why don't you smile for me.
You're not listening.
Our union is pre-destined from the moment you rose from the water like the lady in the lake.
I was taking a bath.
Gawain, listen this is real life and there aren't any white knights in shining armor.
Believe me I know.
It's just a fairy tale.
No, this is our history and now you will be part of it.
News from the border scouts my lord.
I think you'll be pleased.
Speak.
The woman has been spotted there are two men with her.
How timely, Make sure they are appropriately greeted.
Yes, my lord I knew you'd be pleased Now.
Their quest for the Holy Grail stranded my ancestors in this world, so they built a new kingdom here a new Camelot.
In the middle of the jungle? It hasn't been easy.
Over the centuries the dragon has claimed many lives including those of my parents.
Dragon? Oh of course the dragon.
It is said only one who is true of heart can slay the creature.
This is Esme she will fit you.
Fit me? Your wedding dress, my lady.
Oh really so soon? You know speaking from personal experience I've found that long engagements usually work out the best.
The wedding will take place as planned.
What about the invitations, china patterns, finding a decent caterer? Silence.
By sunset tomorrow you will be my Queen Let's hope you've got something in off white.
What's wrong? We've been here for an hour.
You're sure this is the right place? They said due west of the river.
So is Africa.
Well we can't just leave her.
- Tempting.
- Yeah! but I guess not.
Take a look.
What do we have here? It must be the Kings escort.
I'm not so sure about that, look closer.
It seems we've already worn out our welcome.
Don't we always.
Heads up everybody, let's not kill anyone unless we have to.
Halt What the hell was that all about? Marguerite must be in more trouble than we thought.
Well then let's get a move on.
I think that was our cue to leave.
She has a way of doing that.
Oww, I need to breathe, don't I.
I get the feeling there's something you'd like to share.
Not at all my lady.
Didn't need that rib anyway.
Look Esmy you must know the routine around here pretty well.
I, it's true.
Is there any way someone could escape hypothetically speaking of course? They could drop down a deep well ne'er to be heard from again.
I was thinking more along the lines of dark night, swift horse.
I'll take that as a no.
I've been the King's nurse since the day he was born I have.
I'm amazed he survived this long.
It's not fair the weight of the Kingdom on the shoulders of a boy.
Then help me stop him from making a mistake.
Don't see it myself, - some would say pretty I suppose.
- Thanks.
Your lips speak pleasant enough but your eyes always looking somewhere else they are.
It's true.
I don't love him, he's just a boy.
He's my King and he wants you so he shall have you, but if you've ever harm him Queen or no Queen.
I think we understand each other.
May it soon be his head on that pole.
The men were dispatched? Yes, yes I think you'll be pleased.
Excellent we all know how dangerous these jungle tracks can be.
Horrible such terrible ways to die.
Shhh If I'm not mistaken, I think we're about to hear of the terrible tragedy now.
Apparently you're mistaken.
You have failed.
No, no, the brigands.
I would rip out your tongue if I didn't need it to lick my boots.
Welcome strangers.
So where's the part where we blast our way out of this berg.
One slight glitch the knights took all our weapons.
They get nervous when armed strangers walk around their camp.
You just handed over the guns? Well we were a little out numbered.
- It was either that or die.
- No, excuse, excuses.
My god Marguerite what the hell have you gotten us into this time.
Is that any way to talk to a Queen.
Future Queen, not to mention a royal pain in the Ugo, at your service shall I kill the unpleasant one now.
Let me think about that.
I'm also well versed in several forms of torture.
Marguerite? On second thoughts no why should I have all the fun.
You may leave us now.
This is not a game.
- I know that.
- No you don't.
You're playing with dynamite and it's going to blow up right in our faces.
There you see that anger, the way they quarrel.
No you are wrong Vordred.
I'm afraid not sire.
I know the signs.
Those two are obviously in love.
I have claimed her, I am King.
Yes as was Arthur but did that stop Lancelot? What are you saying? The gallant young King betrayed by his Queen and her shining knight.
They would not dare.
Have I not always counseled you wisely? After your parents died did I not take you under my wing? Arthur showed Lancelot mercy and Camelot fell.
That man, my brave young king, is your Lancelot.
The fate of your empire hangs in the balance.
I pray you do not make Arthur's mistake.
It's Camelot in the jungle I couldn't even have written this.
Now's your chance put that writer's imagination to work.
We need a happy ending for Marguerite.
Not to mention the rest of us.
What is it? Look whose back for more.
Easy we don't have any weapons.
You fools why do the strangers live? - Cold blooded murderer.
- Shhh Now you know what has to be done.
Go and finish the job you failed so miserably at.
Make sure there's no connection to me, go.
Something's rotten in Camelot.
Over here boys.
Hurry I'm waiting.
So am I.
Okay let's talk.
So you have no idea who the attackers were? We freed the kingdom of bandits years ago.
No one would dare trespass on my territory.
You see it's impossible.
Yes well impossible or not - it happened.
Yes well as you claim.
Are you calling me a liar? Sit down sir, you forget where you are.
Why would he make up a story like that? I wouldn't presume to understand his motivations.
- All right on your feet.
- Roxton.
dynamite remember? You were right okay.
Do you really think this will work? You heard them, Vordred's going to try and topple the King.
We'll need our guns.
Even if we find them, who's going to believe us? Anyone who doesn't want to get shot.
Nothing you? - No.
- One more shot.
Some of the knights must be loyal to the King.
How do we know who's on our side and who's on Vordreds? They try to kill us they're not on our side.
Piece of cake.
Hurry up.
What did I tell ya pay dirt.
Charming why not try yes why not try.
Another time.
Veronica? - What's happened? - What is the meaning of this? I think you'll be pleased.
Well speak.
I caught them going after their weapons.
Ah hah you see Gawain you are in danger.
Only not from us.
This man plans to kill you and takeover your kingdom.
My lord you see how clumsily they try to confuse and deceive us.
Look buster if anybody's a little shady around here.
You must believe us.
Your life is in danger.
I've seen no evidence.
Gawain - listen to me.
I believe them.
Of course you do, you're one of them.
Who would you believe your future wife or the prince of darkness here? Vordred has been my adviser all my life.
Yet how can I not believe the woman I love? There is one way that we can be certain.
Let the strangers face the dragon.
Dragon? T-Rex.
If they are true of heart then they will return with the dragons tooth.
But if not then this one will be sacrificed for the treasoner she most surely is.
You! - No please if you do love me.
- He's right if you speak the truth a sword and a true heart is all you'll need.
Sword? Against a T-Rex? - It's murder.
- Silence.
King has spoken.
It's not too late to stop this.
- I have given my command.
- So given other one.
I'm not a custom to taking orders from a woman.
And I am not a custom to begging.
Please, Gawain they're my friends.
And I am your King.
You're not a King you're an arrogant child, spoiled little brat.
Vordred warned me this would happen.
You love him.
Who? - The one called Roxton.
- Oh, please.
I may be only a boy but I know something of the ways of men and women.
You know nothing.
How dare you speak to your King that way! It takes more than a crown to call yourself a King.
Halt! I have not given you permission to leave! Marguerite! Please.
Yes? Your highness.
- Is something amiss? - Of course not be gone wench, you will do my bidding later.
Now what? The dragon hunts on the other side of the valley.
Here.
Where's mine? The squire does not get a sword.
Squire? It wasn't my idea.
Why not just kill us.
See - if the dragon kills us Vordred's hands are clean.
And not to worry if you're pure of heart you have nothing to fear.
Maybe the dragon will just give you his tooth.
If it'll make you feel any better you can hold the damn sword.
Oh no you're the knight.
So, Sir Roxton what is the plan? I haven't a clue whoa wait up a second.
Damn his foot is bigger than this sword.
Don't look at me I'm just the squire.
Tell that to him.
Not bad in a pinch.
Forget about the damn dress.
You haven't heard anything I've said at all.
Oh I missed a bit I did.
Gawain trusts you.
He'd listen to you.
Vordred's no saint that's for sure but killer, conspirator? If he wanted the King dead why wait till now? In case you haven't noticed Gawain is becoming a man with a mind of his own.
Not to mention a bride and God help me possibly an heir.
If Vordred can seize control now Gawain's kingdom will be his.
Let's say I believe you.
It's about time.
All the more reason for the marriage to go ahead as planned.
What? King and Queen if Vordred's mad for the throne he'd have to kill both of you to get it.
Great - What are you doing? - My earring.
What? Yesyes a wedding present from our gracious King.
Please, there's a fine reward.
- Reward? - Yes! Well where did it drop? Over here.
Hurry up.
You're welcome.
I can hear someone coming.
It's just your imagination.
Halt! My imagination just brought a friend.
What's this? after them.
They're right behind us.
I know I know it's so dark out here I can't even see where I'm going.
- At this rate will never lose them.
- All you try escaping in a dress.
Come on.
They can't be far.
- Where now? - There! Gotta hand it to you.
That was a great idea.
Don't move.
Don't breathe.
Like I said great idea.
At least I brought us some they won't stay fooled for very long.
- They'll be back any second.
- I can't.
What? We come all this way for you and now you want to stay? How can I leave the poor kid in the clutches of the wicked stepfather? Oh you picked a lousy time go soft.
Think about it Vordred is going to kill him.
Leaving him will be like sentencing him to death.
In case you've forgotten that's just what they've done to Roxton and Malone.
You're a better tracker than I am.
You go find the men.
I'll go back and look after Gawain.
That kid really got to you didn't he? They must be close.
Go Why are you not in your bedchamber? Who can sleep with all the noise? Enter.
Sire, the the woman has escaped.
Locked in the stocks guarded by my knights? She must have had help.
I've never been so insulted.
Where were you tonight? Not in your chamber I already looked.
I bet you did.
Well? She was with me.
I was? I was.
Sire, may I? I have a witness the knight she knocked unconscious.
Like yourself I certainly am aware of the woman's charms, but where the security of the kingdom is at stake.
You accuse me of lying? No.
No your grace not lying.
Then what? Nothing my mistake your highness.
You lied for me.
You're right, I'm not a King I'm a fake.
Gawain don't.
I should have known better.
Only a fool rules with his heart and not his head.
No not a fool just a man.
That woman's influence is growing.
Soon I won't be able to control him at all.
Well desperate times call for desperate measures.
What do you mean? You feel that? That's the feel of power slipping through my fingers.
Not very pleasant is it? The King must not make it through his wedding alive.
Now get to work.
We've been going in circles.
You're crazy.
It's the third time I've seen that tree.
We've been all around this valley.
If there's a T-Rex around here we would've heard by now.
You were saying Malone? I wonder if this is how Saint George did it? Wonder later lets get the hell out of here.
We can't keep this up.
- Any ideas? - Yeah split up.
What? He can't follow both of us.
Me and my big mouth.
Throw me the sword.
Are you out of your mind? Trust me.
Oh yeah.
Any time Malone! Malone! That's it.
Dammit Roxton? Roxton? Where the hell is everybody? Good morning.
Bad luck to see the bride, guess we'll have to postpone.
Speaking of bad luck.
Not now this is a day of joy and celebration - and in that spirit - Vordred wants to make a wedding toast.
He does, does he? Blessed are we on this magnificent day.
May the glory and the spirit of your love shine on all the kingdom of Gawain long live the King.
Stop! - Marguerite? - Don't drink.
Your highness? Explain yourself.
Bad year I think.
Enough foolishness now let us drink.
No! I don't understand? Poison Poison? - How dare you.
- Really? Sire I am insulted by this accusation.
Insulted enough to drink the King's wine? Enough! I've had enough suspicions innuendos! I'm sick of it! - I was only - Be gone get out of my sight.
Come on you son of a bitch - where are you? Make that 'Sir' son of a bitch.
I thought you were goner for sure.
That makes both of us.
It worked.
Good job Malone.
Now let's clear some of these rocks, get our tooth and go home.
Whoa how'd you do that? Just call him Saint George.
Marguerite, Marguerite please wait.
First you want me to leave now you want me to stay, make up your mind.
What you did back there in front of Vordred, it was very brave, I was touched.
Touched in the head.
No, your concern for me was very moving.
You've got a funny way of showing it.
Vordred chose most of the retainers for this hunting trip.
- So? - So, that wine was poisoned.
It was.
To force our hand now would be too dangerous.
If Vordred's allegiance is false, than who here can I trust? So that was all an act? If we can make it safely back to my kingdom I'll have my loyal supporters, but here.
You believe me? How could I not believe my Queen? Halt! Let me pass.
The King cannot be found.
Pity that; get out of me way.
I know what you're up to.
You stop that.
Spiriting our King to safety.
You're mad.
No I'm mad.
Ugo Where is Gawain? I would not betray my one true King.
That's admirable indeed.
Gawain! I will slice this woman into a million pieces if I have to! You have one last chance! No! Well, well, well let's put divine right to the test.
Gawain no! He is still a boy.
Well then which of you have the courage to be the King's champion and fight me to the death anyone? You see I have no one.
I have no champion.
Oh I wouldn't be so sure about that your highness.
This one's on me.
So be it.
Roxton are you sure about this? Hell no.
Please tell me this isn't your first joust.
Sorry but how hard can it be.
All I have to do is stick him before he sticks me.
Wouldn't it be easier just to shoot him.
Spoken like a faithful squire, but when in Rome or in this case Camelot.
Now, shut up Malone and pass me my lance.
Good luck Thanks I'll need it.
Ugo.
Ugo.
Be careful.
Damn you to hell! After you I insist.
No! Do you yield? In front of your peers do you yield to my rule? I yield.
Then rise.
Are you sure about this? Vordred is my enemy but he is still a noble of the realm.
He deserves a trial.
No! yield this Marguerite Ugo help me! Not very pleasant - is it? My knight in shining armor.
A little blood but you'll be fine, you'll be fine.
You fainted.
I guess I did.
What's this? Your friends are waiting outside for you.
I don't understand? What about the wedding? You already offered your life for me once.
I don't have the right to ask for that again.
Especially when I know your heart belongs to someone else.
I think that's the nicest brush off I've ever heard.
Besides there's much to do: Routing out conspirators solidifying allegiances forming a united realm.
Then what? Then hopefully I'll be worthy of someone like you.
You already are.
Well looks who's here.
Hello everyone.
You'll never guess what happened to us? You're right why don't you just tell us.
- Do you know what this is? - A flower.
An orchid, correct.
Ah yes but not just any orchid an entirely new variety.
- Great! - Okay.
Fabulous.
And what the hell have you lot been doing? Apart from lounging around and making an awful mess.
Well Marguerite almost married a boy King.
Veronica was nearly executed by his evil grand vizier.
But luckily Malone managed to slay the dragon with one sword.
And Roxton won the joust, saving the King and his kingdom.
Good try.
Yes really.
And we all lived happily ever after.

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