Totally Spies! (2001) s01e14 Episode Script

1
[THEME MUSIC - MOONBABY, "HERE
WE GO"] (SINGING) Here we go.
We're getting on the road till
we stop, and then we'll shop.
So 1, 2, 3, now,
baby, here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go on a
mission undercover
and we're in control Here we go.
Here we go.
Totally Spies, so
get on with the show.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Hey, Tobey, put that
fantasy junk away.
Yeah?
How about the reality of getting
the chores done before sun up?
Oh, but this is the best part.
The aliens are about to land.
[explosion]
Oh, my!
[music playing]
Straighten out!
Right!
Look out!
I seriously suggest you get
yourself a bus schedule,
young lady, because
at this rate,
there's no way you're going
to pass your driving test.
But I've got to pass.
Girls who drive
attract three times
more boys than girls who don't.
Don't worry, Alex.
We know you'll come
through in the clutch.
Please, don't say clutch.
Huh?
You're the one taking
driver's ed, Alex.
Where are the brakes?
Oh!
Is this WOOHP?
I can't see anything.
I knew I should have
bought that glow-in-the-dark
tank top I saw at the mall.
Have I mentioned how much
I really don't like the dark?
I'm not scared.
It's just, you know, you
never know what's gonna--
Hello, girls.
Jerry!
Ah, you know what
stress does to my skin.
Sorry.
Agent Morrison tripped over
the generator cable again.
Now, take a look at
these satellite tapes
from Italy, Russia, and France.
WOOHP has reason to believe
the people in these videos
were abducted by aliens.
[laughs]
Aliens?
You're kidding, right?
What did you do, bump
your head in the shower
this morning, Jer?
This is serious, spies.
These abductions occurred
in the last two weeks.
The first one was in
this Iowa cornfield.
Your mission is to
visit the abduction site
and look for clues.
I knew we couldn't
be alone in the galaxy.
I knew there was life
on other planets.
Hey, Alex, you sound like
you're from another planet.
Yeah, planet Whatever.
Now then, your equipment will
include some old favorites,
jet pack backpacks,
hair pick lock picks,
heat sensor 6,000 infrared
motion detector sunglasses,
now with wireless internet
connections and digital camera
functions, and some new
items, wrist-mounted
Bradlow XGs and CLALG.
Ew.
Need a glass of water, Jerry?
That's CLALG,
C-L-A-L-G, Combination
Laser and Lip Gloss in fruity,
low-cal bubblegum flavor.
If there are aliens out
there, we'll show them
the best Earth has to offer.
Yay, Earth.
Good bye, and
good luck, ladies.
[screams]
PILOT (ON RADIO): This is
your WOOHP pilot speaking.
We're currently flying over
the Midwest at 37,000 feet.
If you look out the bottom of
the plane, you'll see Iowa.
Bottom of the plane?
[screams]
Whoa!
Looks like it doesn't
matter if she's driving a car
or flying a jet pack,
Alex still can't steer.
I hope she sees that--
Whoa!
Whoa!
--water tower.
Clover?
Sam?
Can you read me?
We're in the cornfield.
It's like a maze.
Oh, yeah.
I can see you.
Hello!
The corn's been cut in
some kind of pattern.
It looks like a giant sandal.
I'm sending a picture
of this back to WOOHP.
[screams]
We're not coming back from
this mission with aliens, just
with corn dust in our hair.
Um, just a tip, don't try that
move during your driver's test.
Right.
Ah, who's there?
I don't like this.
Me neither.
[screams]
Oh, we didn't
mean to scare you.
I'm Tobey, and this is Jed.
Talk about out of this world.
I'm Sam, and this
is Alex and Clover.
We're corn inspectors.
Were you here the night
there were all those lights?
We sure were.
Our buddy, Caleb, got picked
right up into a spaceship.
We've been looking
for him ever since.
What did this
spaceship look like?
It looked like a kumquat.
Nah, more like a
big old rutabaga.
Ah, you got hog
slop in your eyes.
Do you guys take
snack breaks out here?
No.
The nearest burger
place is 40 miles away.
Then, either there were other
humans here the night Caleb got
snatched, or the
aliens went through
the drive-through before
getting down to business.
Hasn't my hair
suffered enough?
Maybe the aliens
have come back.
Huh?
You girls better
check that out.
I'm going to stay here and,
you know, protect the corn.
Someone should
protect them from you.
Who are you, and what
are you doing here?
We're relatives of the
people who disappeared.
We're trying to figure
out what's going on.
Ah, well, I'm
Dr. Sagan Hawking.
I'm an astronomer.
Cool!
I'm a Virgo.
I'm studying the
abductions as well.
If we're facing
an alien invasion,
I want to know just
what we're up against.
Anything you've learned
might be helpful.
Oh, we'd love to help.
Well, then, hop in.
I'll fly you to my little
workshop in the Rockies.
Awesome.
Everything in this place has
to do with researching aliens.
Awesome or completely insane?
You make the call.
This way, girls.
Hey, what is GOOPER?
I'll, uh, take those.
Thank you.
Now then, if you will direct
your attention to the table,
the stars indicate where the
abductions have taken place.
My theory is that aliens
are capturing members
of different
cultures and studying
them so they can decide where
to start the full invasion.
Huh?
There are a lot of countries
they haven't hit yet.
I sure hope they won't
visit Beverly Hills.
And my computers
are predicting
the next abduction will
take place right here
in a bazaar in Saudi Arabia.
Well, thanks for
your time, Doctor.
Wait.
You promised you'd tell me
what you've learned, remember?
We've learned the
alien ship may look
like a kumquat or a rutabaga.
I see.
Well, I trust you'll contact me
if you find out anything else,
and I'll do the same
for you, of course.
Time to sheik our
booties to Saudi Arabia.
This is so my kind of mission,
undercover in bargain city.
Hello?
Focus.
You never know what might
be around the next--
Something tells me they're
not here for the sale.
Now, that's what I
call falling for a girl.
Nice meeting you guys.
I gotta go.
See ya!
Uh-oh.
I don't care how good
the deals are here.
Next time, I shop online.
Nobody touches my hair!
I could swear I saw
that in a movie.
Just remember driver's ed.
Plan ahead when steering,
identify hazards, signal turns,
never, ever tailgate.
Are you all right, Alex?
Totally.
But these guys knew
we were going to be
here, like we were set up.
GOOPER again.
And look at that burger
bag, just like the one
Clover found back in Iowa.
Something tells me Dr.
Hawking is connected.
Afternoon, ladies.
Hey, Jerry, does the name
GOOPER mean anything to you?
Sorry, it doesn't,
but I'll check on it.
However, I do have some
information about that pattern
you found in the cornfield.
Is it an alien message?
I'm not sure, but those
shapes represent numbers.
They're latitude and
longitude coordinates
for an isolated mesa in Mexico.
You'll fly there in this new
WOOHP transport prototype
I'm sure you'll love it.
Cool!
[music playing]
Whoa!
Iowa, Colorado, Saudi
Arabia, Mexico, I mean,
I wish we got frequent flyer
miles for all the places we go.
Tell me about it.
If there were aliens, we could
go visit them on their planet.
Huh?
Look!
Aliens for real.
Maybe.
Cover me.
I'm checking this out.
Cover her?
Against a starship
and Normoprise?
We can't let her go alone.
Come on.
Got a plan yet?
I was hoping maybe you did.
Just a second.
We're talking.
Well, here I am.
Now what?
Hmm?
Whoa!
OK.
No presh, Alex.
Just the first communication
between our two planets.
Um, hey!
What's up?
Excuse me?
Did you just speak English?
Actually, I'm
better with French,
but I'm pretty good in
English and more than 25
other intergalactic dialects.
Why have you been
abducting people?
We've never done that.
It's the GOOPERs.
You know about GOOPER?
There was a distress
message carved by our friends
in the wheat field
saying they had
been captured by evil GOOPERs.
We came as quickly as
we could to save them,
but the GOOPERs
were waiting for us.
I better let my friends
know what's going on.
Great.
It's jammed.
Clover and Sam, I'm
trapped in an alien ship.
Hope you can track me.
Come quick.
Love Alex.
So tell me more
about the GOOPERs.
Are they evil aliens?
Not quite.
Dr. Hawking, have the
GOOPERs captured you, too?
[laughs] Captured me?
They're working for me.
And you, little spy,
are my prisoner.
But we told you, we're just--
Oh, that's right,
concerned relatives.
Please.
I saw you land your jet
packs in that cornfield.
I made up that whole
astronomer story
to find out how much you knew.
So who are you?
I am the leader of GOOPER.
Whoa.
I had the freakiest dream.
Me, too.
Thank goodness it's over.
Don't be afraid.
We won't hurt you.
Finally, someone who
doesn't want to hurt us.
W-W-Wait, wait, wait.
Did you just speak English?
Freaky.
Cool, but yeah, freaky.
It's Alex.
ALEX (ON RADIO): I'm
trapped in an alien ship.
Hope you can track me.
Come quick.
Love, Alex.
She's trapped on that ship.
The GOOPERs got her just
like they got our friend.
Why would they do this?
We would never hurt anyone.
GOOPERs, huh?
Sounds like we've
all got a reason
to get to that big spaceship.
Yeah, but how
are the four of us
going to follow Alex with
just two jet pack backpacks?
Leave that to us.
All right.
Just what is GOOPER, anyway?
Global Organization
of Pilfering
Extraterrestrial Resources.
I tracked this ship over Iowa,
then jammed its equipment.
Now, this ship and
its crew work for me.
And thanks to the
distress message
we left in that
cornfield, I have
two ships to aid in my plan.
What plan?
To create fear.
And when Earth is completely
terrified of an invasion,
I'll force the aliens
to make their demands.
The abductions will only stop
if the world's governments
hand over all their wealth.
What happens to the people
you've already abducted?
Oh, yes.
That is a situation.
I guess they'll have
to be disposed of.
In fact, you'll be the first
to test my obliterator.
Report to me when
you're finished.
I'll be in the control room.
Ah!
Wow!
You gave our Sky
Skimmer a major upgrade.
And it has tracking equipment
so we can find our friends.
Like, how do you know
how to do all this?
Back on our home planet, we
are an elite team of spies.
Let's go.
Dress me up in veils, huh?
Well, look who's laughing now.
That, would be me.
Ah!
That won't stop him for long.
Come on!
Get 'em!
How will we get inside?
We'll just walk in the door.
What door?
Ha, ha!
That door.
Oh.
That must be the obliterator.
Oh, Oh, let me go!
Help!
Help!
Look!
That must be Caleb,
the guy who was
abducted from the cornfield.
They're going to use
it on those people.
Not if we can help it.
But how can the two of
us stop all those goons?
Not to mention us.
There's nowhere to run.
OK.
I'm ready to be rescued now.
Huh?
Are we glad to see you.
Dr. Hawking's behind all this.
I'd tell you more, but it looks
like we still have company.
Now, it's our
turn to help you.
Whoa!
Whoa!
Neat toy.
Where'd you get it?
From our spy supervisor J-Ree.
Jerry?
No.
J-Ree.
Hm?
Help!
Up and over, girls.
You guys bring the aliens.
I'm going for that
big, nasty thingamajig.
Huh?
Let's see, pulse magnitude,
strength indicator.
Here it is.
Merci beaucoup.
They speak French, too?
And more than 25 other
intergalactic dialects.
Merci beaucoup.
Why don't these things
come with an off switch?
What?
You again?
Sorry.
I just had my hair cut.
Dr. Hawking is in
the control room.
Don't touch another button.
Get them.
Give it up, Doctor.
Hurry up, girls.
She just programmed--
Stay back or I'll crash
this ship into Mexico City.
If I can't have this
technology, no one can.
Well, you definitely
can't have it.
Oh!
We're going down!
Tell us something
we don't know.
Steer us clear of the city.
Me?
Steer?
There's no one else.
Alex!
Wait a minute.
Uh, these controls
look kind of familiar.
It's almost exactly like the
car from my driver's ed class,
I think.
Then start driving.
Maybe if I do this.
[screams]
Ah!
I can't keep her up anymore.
I gotta set her down.
There's just enough room there.
I'm gonna park it like a pro.
[screams]
Excuse me.
Driving is hard enough.
You got it?
Please return your seats
to their upright positions.
We have landed.
I sure hope I'll pass my
driving test after that.
If you ever need
your corn inspected,
um, here's my number.
Bye, guys!
Have a safe flight.
Merci beaucoup.
Maybe someday we can
visit them on their planet.
Maybe, but right now,
you've got a test to take.
[giggles]
I've never seen a student
make such quick progress.
How did you do it, Alex?
I practiced on a
giant alien spaceship.
So where do you
want to drive first?
Definitely the mall.
I want to see if I can
attract three times as many
boys now that I can drive.
[crash]
[crying]
[laughter]
Oh, man.
I guess I still need practice
with the parking brake.
[music playing]