Randall Hopkirk (Deceased) (1969) s01e15 Episode Script

Jeannie.
Jeannie, are you there? Jeannie! What are you doing? Who are you? How did you get in here? Who are you? You still leave the key on the ledge outside, Jeannie.
You better get out of here or I shall call the police.
I'm I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Old habits die hard, don't they? What are you talking about? Well, at home with the newspaper.
A drink.
Taking it easy.
Home? You sound as if you own the place.
Well, don't I? Look I think you'd better leave.
Right now.
Right now.
- Go? But I've just come back.
- Come back? Yes, you're right, Jeannie I owe you an explanation.
- Away all this time without a word.
- Away? Where? Look, I've never even seen you before.
Of course you haven't.
Not in this body.
What on earth are you talking about? Who are you? It'll just take a bit of getting used to.
- You know who I am.
- I do not know who you are.
- Course you do, it's Marty.
- Marty? Marty who? Marty Your husband, of course.
Marty Hopkirk.
Yeah, Randall.
Jeannie! Can you come over as quickly as possible? What? Marty? - That's who he says he is.
- 'Of all the lousy tricks.
' Listen, love.
I'll be right over.
Please be as quick as you can.
He's just gone for some champagne to celebrate our reunion.
Two glasses.
You know, the fluted ones I like.
I phoned someone while you were out.
Not old Jeff? It is Jeff, isn't it? Is he coming over? I-I just suggest you'd better not be here.
When Jeff comes? Don't be silly.
I was just going to call him myself.
Jeff! Jeannie, you said something was wrong.
Wrong, it's me, Jeff.
Marty! This calls for some champagne.
Wait a minute.
What's happening? - I told you on the phone, Jeff.
- Who are you? Look, I know it sounds unconventional, but it's the way it is.
I'm back.
You expect us to fall for that? What do you want? Ask me any question you like about us.
- Come on.
- Come on? No, please.
Please.
I know I was hysterical on the phone, but not that, please.
No.
Look, will someone please tell me what's going on? I know it's tough to accept, but - He's not taken you in, has he? - No.
I don't know.
Jean, look I mean, where's he come from? All right, let's suppose he's Marty Hopkirk, but who was he before? Well? Well, it's It's strange.
I don't know.
The first thing I remember, since I died, that is, is about a week ago.
It was a burning car.
A pub sign.
Duke of Cumberland.
Just outside Oxford.
I don't know why I'm listening to this.
- D'you remember? - You're leaving now.
Of course I am.
I wouldn't stay.
Not until Jeannie's satisfied that it's really me.
Better change the lock.
Oh, no need for that.
Just, don't leave the key on the ledge outside.
I'll call you first thing in the morning.
Let's go then, Jeff.
- Night, Jeannie.
- Night.
- Look, I'll sort this out.
- OK, Jeff.
Thank you.
- Bye.
- Night.
You know, it's good to be home, even if I do have to leave for a while.
Don't worry, Jeff.
It'll be all right.
You want to bet? - Very strange.
- Bizarre.
- But we'd better stay with him.
- Absolutely.
Especially while he displays such an attraction to the lady.
I suppose there'd be no point in No, not really.
Best to leave it to our frontrunner.
Where d'you wanna go? I don't want to take you out of your way.
It's no problem.
Just get in the car.
All right.
Hold it.
- What was that for?! - Just for the record.
- Comfortable, my dear fellow? - Yes, rather.
- Griggs.
- Yes, sir? - Follow that car.
- Sir.
- So where d'you wanna go? - Um, I'm in a small hotel, Jeff, just back of your apartment.
Unless you've moved.
Marty? Marty? Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all? Young Marty Hopkirk.
I thought vanity would get you here.
Don't you believe it.
I was gonna call on you anyway.
- What's with the lighting? - I'm printing a picture.
- This one.
- For a new case? - You could call it that.
- Well? - Prepare yourself for a shock.
- Oh? This fella's going about saying he's you, in someone else's body.
Oh, is he? That's nice for him.
You're not serious, are you? But where will that get him? As long as he doesn't bother Jeannie.
Jeff? He hasn't seen her? She didn't believe him? But this is ridiculous! - What's his name? - Marty Hopkirk.
That rings a bell.
All this was tonight? - Yeah.
He went to see Jeannie - Why didn't you hit him? - It's all right.
She's alone.
- Of course she's alone.
I saw him off the premises.
The thing that bothers me is, what's his game? Jeannie's very attractive.
He's just a layabout trying it on.
There's more to it than that.
- More? - Something, something.
- There must be.
You got any ideas? - No, I haven't.
- He's supposed to look like me.
- Yeah.
- Talks like me? - So-so.
- Knows a lot about me.
- Plenty.
- But It's funny.
- What? Every time I look at this photograph, I get the feeling I've seen him somewhere before.
- Is that the place? - Yeah.
The Duke of Cumberland.
That sign is the last thing he claims to remember - before he became you.
- That's quite a coincidence.
Have you been here before? Jeannie and I toured the Cotswolds on our honeymoon, remember? We stayed there the first night we were married.
Uh-huh? I don't pretend to understand, but he said something about a burning car.
- The last thing he remembered? - Yeah.
I can check it out.
Anyone home? - Good morning.
Are you open? - Only just, sir.
What'll it be? Pint of bitter, please.
What about you? Oh, I'll have a half.
Thank you, sir.
- Nice part of the country, this.
- So they tell me.
- Thank you.
- Business, is it? Yes.
Insurance.
Car insurance.
- I hear you had a nasty smash here.
- A write-off.
And the driver was? Outright.
I dragged him clear, in fact.
The whole thing went up in flames.
It was too late.
Could you identify him? Yes.
That's him all right.
Are you certain? It's not the sort of thing you forget.
That was him all right and he was dead.
- What do you make of it? - I don't know.
The whole thing's ridiculous.
He doesn't even take a good photograph.
But the landlord said he was dead.
But you saw him walking about.
- I can see you.
- But he wasn't a ghost.
- We've gotta be serious about this.
- I am being serious.
I mean, when Jeannie finds out about his accident, his death, she'll do some hard thinking.
She'll think he's on the level, - that it's me within a spare body? - Yeah.
I don't know what's going on but it must be big.
If this Marty Hopkirk can convince Jean, he's gonna clean up something.
- But what can he be after? - I don't know.
Where is Jeannie anyway? You think I don't know why you suggested spending the day here at Woburn Abbey? - Do you know? - Sure.
It's a great place.
To Marty it was more than just a great place.
Yes, of course it is.
I've always been fascinated by Woburn.
It's my favourite stately home.
Apart from that, he also knew a great deal about it.
Oh, so I'm on a test.
Right, fire away.
I'll show you the Canaletto room.
It's first right at the top of the stairs.
Right.
Yeah, it's up there.
- How was that? Did I pass? - Oh, ten out of ten.
Good.
Come on, I'll take you on the tour.
Here.
- They've gone.
- I think we'll join the tour.
D'you think we'll see the Duke? That's the camellia house.
- What's that? - What? Oh, that used to be the greenhouse.
It's now the sculpture gallery.
The fifth duke commissioned Henry Holland and d'you know, the fifth duke died at the age of 37 after a strenuous game of tennis.
All right.
I give in.
So you believe me? Oh, yes.
I believe you know a great deal about Woburn Abbey.
But you still don't think I'm Marty.
Look, let's just leave it a while.
OK.
Come on, I'll buy you some lunch.
Oh, all right.
Where? Where else? Our favourite spot in this neck of the woods.
Dunstable - the Chop House.
Come on.
D'you think he's asked the crucial question yet? No, still softening up, I should think.
We could face him.
After all, we do have an equal share in the project.
Yes, face him.
Sheldon has decided it for us.
Obviously he intended to go double-cross.
Why shouldn't we? - What are you doing here? - Waiting for you.
That's obvious.
How did you get in? - You gave me a key months ago.
- That was for emergencies.
- What d'you think this is? - I don't consider it an emergency.
I've got to talk to you.
Well, you'll have to shout through the bathroom door.
- I'm being picked up in 15 minutes.
- By this Marty character.
- Mmm.
- Listen, this is for your own good.
It always is.
You don't imagine this fellow's interested in you, do you? - Well, do you? - It's not impossible.
- Is it? - I suppose not.
I don't know what this young pretender's up to but he's certainly not interested in you.
Well, at least he is young.
- Stay away from him, Jeannie! - I don't see why I should.
Don't say you've fallen for him.
You think I'm being taken for a fool, don't you? Yes.
Look, I don't know what I believe, but one thing I do know - What's that? - I'm going to find out.
For myself.
- Jeff.
- What? Hang on.
- Look at those two.
- What about 'em? They're working late, aren't they? - It's part of the export drive.
- Jeff.
They could be watching Jeannie's apartment.
You're imagining things.
Hang on.
Look.
He's carrying a bunch of flowers.
- He's got some red roses.
- For memory? Go on, then.
Put it in there.
Left hand down a bit, right hand Bit more.
Get nearer.
You're doing all right.
Pull it in a bit.
You're all right there.
They've kidnapped him.
And they've done it with flowers.
Jeff, follow the truck.
Follow it, come on! We do hope you won't try anything spectacular before we've had our little talk.
- Spectacular? - Like an escape.
Griggs wouldn't like it.
- I don't want to upset Griggs.
- We didn't think you would.
- It's the late Mr.
Hopkirk's partner.
- Yes.
Mr.
Randall.
D'you think we ought to help Griggs? Do you think he needs it? Jeff, look out! - I suppose we could leave him here.
- I don't see why not.
- Randall's not our problem.
- True.
Our immediate concern is to find our vanished frontrunner.
- Thank you for a lovely evening.
- The name's Marty.
- This is a super car.
- Yeah.
It isn't like the old jalopy I used to drive.
BAP 245 B.
How could you possibly know that? Jeannie, some time you're gonna have to open your eyes, face the facts.
I forgot! Here.
Something for you.
- They're a bit battered.
- They were lovely.
- Jean.
- Mm? I think it's time we sorted out our problem, don't you? - Yes, but I don't quite know how.
- I've got an idea.
- Say we take a trip together.
- A trip? Yeah.
To the Cotswolds maybe.
- But that's where Marty and I - Yeah, maybe we could have lunch at the Duke of Cumberland.
Remember? - Will you do it? - I don't know.
Will you think about it? I don't really need to.
Yes, I'd love to.
- I don't know.
- Everything all right? Just about.
He brought Jeannie back just after midnight.
He dropped her off a block away, presumably to keep clear of his friends - the fat one, the thin one and the chauffeur.
So she's back at her place? Tucked up in bed.
I can't think why Jeannie's seeing him.
I told you what she said.
To find out for herself.
As long as she doesn't end up believing him.
What do we do now? As before.
Try and work out what's going on.
And we've got these three gentlemen to account for.
If only I could work out why this Marty character seems so familiar.
That's the clue to the whole thing.
You.
D'you think so? I'm certain - your connection with this Marty fellow, whatever that is.
Why don't you pop off somewhere and think about it? Where do I start? Morning, Randall.
Sit.
- Me or the dog? - Both of you.
Woof.
All right, gentlemen.
- We've come to apologise.
- For last night.
We trust we did you no permanent harm.
It'll probably come out in my grandchildren.
And what can I do for you? We shouldn't just have left you last night.
Your collective conscience is playing you up? No, no.
We didn't realise your intrepid, self-sacrificial rescue attempt - And after we left you.
- meant you were in it together.
Together? Mmm.
He'd have to use you, or an old friend of the late Mr.
Hopkirk's, - to acquire his knowledge.
- Quite.
So, you and Sheldon were in it together.
QED.
Sheldon.
Augustus John Sheldon.
- Wasn't that the last name he used? - That's right, sir.
As I was saying, you were accomplices, right? Why not? There's plenty in it for me.
of the best Georgian silver.
My dear boy, there's plenty in it for everybody.
But Sheldon was inordinately greedy.
I suggested a split.
Five ways, not counting the dog.
- Counting the dog.
- But he wouldn't.
- He wanted the lion's share.
- Something like that.
- Does he know yet? - Does he know where it's buried? - Exactly, I mean.
- No, he doesn't.
So, we're back at first base.
A wood in Oxfordshire.
A disagreeably wooded county.
He could be lying, sir.
Perhaps we should let Rex find out.
You've got a pretty neurotic dog there.
You won't get any more out of me.
I'll go along with a five-way split.
All right, Rex, you're in.
Six.
What d'you think? I think our last night's instincts were the best.
- Straight to the source.
- Young Sheldon.
This one has nothing to offer, at least at the moment.
See that Mr.
Randall stays to enjoy his breakfast.
Well, absolutely nothing here.
Not one tiny clue.
- Sheldon must be making his move.
- To a wood somewhere in Oxfordshire.
It would appear his explanation was true.
- After burying the spoils - A car accident.
- Concussion.
- Amnesia.
Which completely obliterated the memory of the exact spot.
Now only Mrs.
Hopkirk knows where.
- Had your breakfast? - Eh? Oh.
Hello, who's your friend? It's all right, Rex.
He won't hurt you.
- What happened? - They've been.
- Who? - The Three Musketeers.
Left Rex to guard me and went to see Sheldon.
- Who's Sheldon? - Marty's real name.
I've got to get past that dog.
Get past him? It's easy.
Watch this.
- What's his name again? - Rex.
Rex? Right.
Now, listen, Rex.
Come on, you're very tired, Rex.
Very tired.
You've had a hard morning, Rex.
I want you to do something for me.
You're very tired.
You've had an exhausting morning, Rex.
You're very, very sleepy.
Come on.
I want you to yawn, Rex.
Come on, sleep, Rex.
Sleep.
Lie down, Rex.
Sleep.
Sleep.
Away you go, Rex.
Go on.
Bye-bye.
Sleepy-byes, Rex.
Away you go.
- What you done to it? - Autosuggestion.
Young Rex is dreaming about green fields, bunny rabbits and lady greyhounds.
I hope you're right.
He hasn't had his breakfast.
- Go on, take a look.
- Right.
You'd better take a look yourself.
What a mess.
Look at it! Ah, Jeannie's kept all my letters.
Yeah.
They've been through every word.
Don't you read them! At least it means they haven't got Jeannie and Sheldon.
They must have gone away together! - Her suitcases have gone! - They must have gone away.
What's she thinking of? Going away with Now, listen! Suppose he's still playing Marty Hopkirk, where would you have taken her? I could have taken her anywhere! Stop being so stupidly possessive and think.
It's important.
- Where would I have taken her? - Right.
Well, we'd go hill walking in Scotland.
- This time of year? - Yeah, Jeannie hated it.
- Come on, Marty! - Jeff, the honeymoon hotel! - Where? - In the Cotswolds.
- The name.
- The Duke of Cumberland! That's where that fella said he was killed.
- Admirable watchdog, Griggs.
- I don't understand it, sir.
First we lose Sheldon, now we've lost Randall.
No sign of our only other lead, Mrs.
Hopkirk.
- Randall must have gone somewhere.
- An illuminating thought, Griggs.
Suppose he went back to Mrs.
Hopkirk's, we might pick up the trail from there.
That's Mr.
Randall's car.
Georgian silver.
That's what it's all about.
Yeah.
I reckon about 50 grand's worth.
- And very easy to get rid of.
- Right.
What's all this about a wood in Oxfordshire? I don't know.
Let's start at the beginning.
There's a robbery, right, Sheldon and the others.
He hides it somewhere they don't know about, in a wood in Oxfordshire.
Like the fat man said, a disagreeably woody county.
So, why doesn't Sheldon just go back quietly and dig it up? What's Jeannie got to do with it? You and she both are supposed to know about it.
Think, Marty, think! What would I be doing in a wood in Oxfordshire? D'you remember the first time we came along here, Jeannie? I could hardly forget.
Do you really remember? No, not everything.
My memory's as imperfect as the next man's.
For instance, do you remember the crash we had on the way? Crash? It was hardly more than a slight bump.
It can't have been far from here but I can't remember where exactly.
Don't you remember making me stay in the car? Yes, and I remember how angry the other driver was.
- I never saw him.
- Where was it? I remember there was thick wood on either side of the road, sort of like this It was about a mile from here, where the road bends at the crossroads.
So it was, Jeannie.
So it was.
If you could just get the small one, Jeannie.
Why, Mr.
Sheldon.
Quiet, you've never set eyes on me before.
Don't worry.
- I'll see you all right.
- I had no complaints last time, sir.
Right.
Well, first things first, what'll it be? If that's the case, I think I'd like to go up to my room and freshen up.
Of course, come on.
- Got a nice room for Mrs.
Hopkirk? - Certainly, sir.
Facing front.
They say Anne Boleyn once slept there.
- Oh? - It didn't do her a lot of good.
I'll take a look at my room later.
After some refreshment.
Mrs.
Cox, show this lady to number three, will you? - Yes, sir.
- I'll see you soon.
Go through, Mrs.
Hopkirk.
Mrs.
Cox will show you to your room.
Right, thanks very much.
- What'll it be? - A fiver to keep quiet.
- Make it ten.
- OK.
And I'll have a large whisky on the house.
You drive a hard bargain.
And er throw in a good, strong shovel as well.
And when she comes down, not a word.
You didn't even know I'd gone.
Right.
Hello, there, sir.
Back on business? Yeah.
Have you had any carriage trade today? Bentleys? I don't see all the cars, of course, but I don't think so.
Jeff? Jeannie! I was right, Jeff.
Are you here with this Marty character? - Yes.
- Jeannie! Oh, Jeff, not the way you think.
I wanted to find out what it was all about.
I'm surprised at you, Jeannie.
I should throw you through your sixteenth-century windows.
Jeff, what are you doing? He doesn't look as though he's seen a ghost, does he? - Ghost? - The ghost of Marty Hopkirk.
I don't understand.
He claims he dragged him dead from a blazing car.
But Marty walked in today and he didn't even bat an eyelid.
- Hit him.
- You mean he's in it, too? Certainly.
Jeannie, this whole mob are looking for some piece of woodland.
The place where we had that slight accident on our honeymoon? That must be it.
That's funny, because he talked about that on the way down.
- That Marty? - Yes, at Chilford crossroads.
There was an accident.
It was the other driver's fault.
He banged his head on the windscreen.
He wouldn't stop.
He drove off again.
I was doing - Jean, I must get over there.
- I can show you the way.
Just direct me, there might be trouble.
- But I want - Jeannie, do as you're told.
You've caused enough trouble.
This accident - the guy hit these wet leaves, skidded across.
I did a fantastic bit of driving to get out the way.
Keep the change, taverner.
Buy yourself something.
Thank you, sir.
I'll have a half a bitter, sir.
D'you get many visitors at this time of year? Not really, sir.
The odd one or two.
Nobody recently arrived in a rather fine Bentley? You gentlemen don't look as though you'd miss a pound or two.
A Mr.
Sheldon? - Mmm.
- Where is he? It'll cost you twenty.
We wouldn't dream of paying less to a man of your evident integrity.
I'm not a man of violence, Randall.
I'm glad to hear it.
Unless pushed.
And now you're pushed.
We could still make a deal.
No deal.
Watch him, Jeff.
Jeff, hit him! He's smaller than you.
Get him down.
Watch him.
Go on, throw him.
Great! Hit him! Come on, put him down.
He's staggering about, come on.
Hit him.
Great.
Great! About time.
Well done, Jeff.
Serves you right.
Hello, here's the second team.
Set the dog on him, Griggs.
I'll handle the dog if you can manage the other three.
OK? Oh, yeah.
Rex, will you stop messing about? Down.
Down, Rex.
That's it.
Go to sleep.
Rex, you're very sleepy.
Go to sleep.
Sleep.
I told you, Griggs.
He's lost his aggression.
- Shut up.
Rex! - Now, up to you, Mr.
Randall.
No deal? No deal.
- Right men, spread out.
- It's over here somewhere.
Well, I suppose that's that.
All this for nothing.
You should've made that deal.
I'll be satisfied with the reward money.
- Reward? - Mmm.
This is part of the Worthing silver collection.
- How d'you know that? - It's written on the bottom.
These three conned Lady Worthing with some story about a miracle silver polish.
One application of our polish, madam, and all your silver worries will be gone.
It was a claim we did our best to live up to.
I bet you did.
But why did Sheldon? Why didn't he just come to me and ask where Marty had crashed? I don't know.
Once a con man, always a con man.
No wonder he looked familiar.
He was the other driver.
He must have just buried the stuff.
- What about? - He's no bother.
You called, O Master? Rex, how many times have I told you? Behave yourself.
Sleep.
Go to sleep.
Behave yourself.
Now, listen.
You and I have got to have an understanding.
When I say go to sleep, I mean go to sleep, Rex.
Come along Jeannie.
Away you go.
Bunny rabbits, Rex.
Bunny rabbits! Lots of meat.
No people to chase, Rex.
Sleeeeep.
Sleep, Rex.