The Villains Of Valley View (2022) s01e15 Episode Script
A Superhero in Valley View
So, I figured out a way
to stop confusing those
twin sisters at school.
Ignore them both. Problem solved.
Uh-huh.
Are you even listening to me?
Uh-huh.
- Amy!
- Uh, see?
If you've been paying attention,
you would've seen that coming.
Sorry.
I was looking at that kid
over there in the hoodie.
He seem lonely.
And weird.
Which probably explains
the lonely part.
Maybe I should go over and say hi.
Oh, right. 'Cause when I see someone
clearly trying to avoid people,
my first instinct is
to always go and say hi.
Well, maybe they're shy,
like you when you first moved here.
I was not shy.
I was standoffish and hostile.
There's a difference.
I'm going over
to introduce myself.
- You can come or not.
- I choose not.
- You're coming.
- Okay.
Then why even give me a choice?
Hi there.
We wanted to welcome you to Valley View.
I'm Hartley.
See? I told you.
Just leave him alone.
Sorry to bother you.
Amy, wait.
Starling?
Starling? What are you doing here?
Did you finally come to your senses
and realize we should be besties?
No.
And I don't know how you got my number
but you need to stop calling.
What was with the disguise?
Shame of being a
superhero finally set in?
I came to warn you.
The superheroes received intel
that you and your family are on the run.
What?
I knew it.
She turned us in and Jake
fell right into her trap.
I didn't turn you in.
Come here.
The superheroes were going
through old security footage
from Centropolis and
they saw me save Jake
from falling off that building
back when he was still Chaos.
Well, you're a superhero.
What were you supposed
to do, let him fall?
Hmm? I would have had
that same moral debate.
It was the "not turning him in" part
that they had a problem with.
Now, the superheroes think
I'm helping your family hide out.
- So tell them you're not.
- I did.
But then, they confiscated my phone
and they found all of my
text messages with Jake
from the last few months.
Yikes!
How many kissy face emojis
do they have to sift through?
Three hundred and fifty-seven.
And then they questioned me,
but I refused to give you up,
so they banished me
from the superhero community forever.
Huh. I always thought you'd
grow old as a superhero.
You know, still flying around in the sky
but, like, 10 miles an
hour below the speed limit.
Wow. All those times I
tried to take you down,
and my brother ended up
doing it accidentally.
Technically, that's still a win for me.
And now that you know,
I should go start my new life on my own.
Wait,
what about your superhero family?
I had to leave them behind.
I didn't want them to get
in trouble for helping me.
Well, at least let me call Jake
so he can come and say goodbye to you.
No way.
If he finds out that they kicked me out
because of him, he'll wanna fight them
which could lead to bad
things for all of us.
I don't think Jake would
risk his family's safety.
By doing something stupid
to save someone else?
Yeah, he totally would.
I should go before he sees me.
Starling, wait.
We can't turn our backs on her.
The superheroes tossed her out
for protecting you and your family.
You're right.
We should kick in five
bucks each for a bus ticket.
That'll at least get her to Louisiana.
She needs our help.
Starling, you can stay with me
while you figure out your next move.
Oh, you can have my bed and
I'll take my sleeping bag.
It has your face on it.
Oh, you can have my pillow, too.
That also has your face on it.
I have a lot of stuff
with your face on it.
Okay. Fine.
But just until I make a plan
and Jake cannot know that I'm here.
Then you better hood up
'cause he just walked in.
Hey.
What's up with your friend?
Oh
uh, she's a table sniffer.
Yeah, apparently it's a thing.
Yeah, everyone's doing it.
Well, congrats, Amy, you're no longer
the weirdest one in Valley View.
Eva, honey,
I'm honored to have you
with the unveiling
of my latest creation.
Oh, well, it was either this
or reruns of house pet divorce court.
I can't sit through another
custody battle over a Corgi.
Check it out.
This device can shoot a laser
that will mimic the powers
of the greatest villains of our time.
You just choose the power you want
and this device will mirror it.
I call it The Mirror.
Wait, did you say The Mirror?
No, no. The Mirror.
The Mirror.
It's better on paper.
Don't you mean, The Paper?
Hey, Celia just stopped me
and said she's really upset at Jake
for what he did outside
her window this morning.
Hmm. Stop right there.
I don't wanna know what he was doing.
He was rearranging our garden gnomes
into very inappropriate poses.
Oh, that's both better and worse
than what I was thinking.
No, that's impossible.
Jake spent the morning LARPing with me.
So now we're all just
doing embarrassing things?
Celia insists it was Jake.
Or as she likes to call him,
"The boy that shakes
when he talks to me."
Oh, no.
There's only one explanation for this.
Bad Jake is back.
Hey, what do you mean he's back?
I thought you vaporized him.
Yeah. He may have escaped
before I had the chance
and I just didn't tell you.
But to be fair,
hiding things from you
wasn't my wedding vows.
Right. So now everyone thinks our son
is doing villainous
things around the town.
This could blow our secret.
Don't worry. I'll track him down.
I'll put him in my trusty nano-cuffs.
Even Bad Jake's super
strength can't break these.
Really? Then how did
Hartley break out of home
to go find Amy at Colossal Con?
Son, we've covered
this, helpful or hurtful?
Hurtful is always funnier.
Anyway, once I slapped
the nano-cuffs on Bad Jake,
we'll bring him down here.
We'll use The Mirror.
A name I standby by the way.
We'll vaporize him for good.
Cool. I can help track him down.
Shouldn't be too hard,
considering he's been wearing
the same clothes for
the past three months
and the same underwear.
Sorry, Colby. This is big boy stuff.
You just stand back and marvel
as your father saves the day once again.
Too bad you couldn't
do it the first time.
Then we wouldn't have to spend our day
chasing around Jake's creepy clone.
Again, Colby, helpful or hurtful?
Okay, Starling, coast is clear.
Do you really think this thing
is gonna hide me from Jake?
Oh, I know it will.
Every time my grandma wants me
to clean my room, I just slap
on this bush costume and hide outside.
She's never found me.
That explains a lot about you.
Where did you even
get this crazy costume?
Oh, I played a bush in
three different school plays.
The Valley View Times said it was like
they didn't even know I was there.
Nailed it.
I'm glad you two found each other.
Yeah. Well, anyway, I've
come up with some great ideas
to get you out of our lives quickly.
It all starts with you
strapped to a rocket
hurdling towards Mars.
Oh, if that doesn't work,
I have seven other ideas.
Do they all end with
me on another planet?
They do, yeah.
Look, well, I appreciate
all of your help.
I think it's best if I just head out.
The longer I stay here, the
more likely Jake will find me.
Oh, he's coming. Hide!
Hey, yo, peeps.
Everything off the chain?
Yeah, I hear it and I'll stop.
What are you up to?
Just bumped into Celia.
She's really mad at me.
But when I asked her why,
she just growled and said,
"Hands off my gnome, sicko!"
Did that bush just sneeze?
Is that bush wearing sneakers?
Yeah. Yeah.
It's a special bush native to Texas.
It's the, uh
the sneezing sneaker bush.
They're kind of endangered,
so if you try to touch it,
it's our civic duty to report you
to the local Fish and Game Commission
and trust me, no one
wants to go to fish jail.
Nope.
You're hiding something.
No, no.
Let me go!
No!
Starling?
Surprise!
Some people just aren't
cut out to be a bush.
Starling, what are you doing here?
Uh, she came to celebrate
Earth Day.
Yup. She loves the environment.
That is why we are both
dressed like native plants.
You're not dressed like a plant.
Ow!
I'm a cactus.
No offense, but your
credibility was shot
the moment you said
sneezing sneaker bush.
This is useless. We should
just tell him the truth.
- Jake, I'm here because
- I wanted to talk.
Yeah, I felt I felt so bad
about ruining your first
date at the junkyard
that I wanted to apologize to her
because
we are friends now.
Yeah.
Friends who don't touch each other.
Hands off the leaves.
Well, now, you two can finally go
on your first date together.
Yup.
That's why I'm here.
So I guess it wouldn't
make sense not to do it.
Oh, well, great.
Then I should go change
into something nicer.
Maybe you should, too.
I told you the trail of garden gnomes
would help us capture Bad Jake.
He just couldn't resist.
What we had to do is
spend $500 at Gnome Depot.
You had your freedom.
Can't believe you were dumb enough
to come right back to where you escaped.
You're the one who created me.
Doesn't that make you the dumb one?
You know what? I'll
answer this one for you.
Yes, the answer is yes.
Hey, why did you come back anyway?
Well, I was planning a destruction spree
but I didn't want lame
Jake to get all the credit.
So I came back to destroy him.
Plus, I kind of miss the guy who
spent four minutes raising me.
Aw, that's my boy.
Well, not really, but
I'll take the fake love.
Wanna play a round of golf
after I destroy your son?
Not sure. Eva, do we have
anything this afternoon?
Yeah.
Erasing a paper trail.
Oh, right, right, right.
Let's see, one second here.
Synthetic son,
don't worry, this won't hurt a bit.
Mostly because you're
a pile of fake flesh
and you can't feel pain.
Prepare to be vaporized.
You know, next time, you
might not wanna tell me
what you're gonna do before you do it.
Seriously? Prepare to be vaporized?
What does that even mean?
How does one prepared to be vaporized?
I don't know.
I was picturing a fetal
position, maybe some begging.
In my head, it was very dramatic.
I'll take that.
Oh, shrink ray.
Seems fun.
No, wait. On second thought,
it's a beautiful day for golf.
We could use the clubhouse.
You like BLTs?
Oh, looks like now
we can play mini golf.
Uh-uh. I just hit my growth spurt,
no way I'm going back.
- Where'd you go?
- Ha ha!
He ghosted you.
But technically he turned invisible
but the joke still works!
I don't have time for this.
I have another brother to take out.
Colby, activate the lockdown mode.
Ah, now you're trapped without the key.
Wait, what?
I made the door so secured,
not even a super strength
can break through.
I call it man cave mode.
Oh, big words for someone who
doesn't think things through!
Well, looks like if
I'm gonna get that key,
I'm gonna have to end up taking
out both brothers after all.
Where are you, Colby?
Over here!
No. Over here.
Over here.
On the bright side, at
least you finally have
a body to match the size of your brain.
Go ahead and order whatever you want.
I don't wanna brag, but I
do have an employee discount.
Oh, how much?
Okay, I lied. It comes
out of my paycheck.
I'm just so happy you're
back in Valley View,
like actually here with me.
I was convinced I'd never see you again
but now we can finally work
through things together.
No complications, no distractions.
Oh, Chimichangas are back on the menu.
Jake.
You're right. I'm sorry.
I haven't even asked about you.
How are things in the superhero world?
Great. You know still super-heroing.
Crime is up, so business is good.
- Do you have to get that?
- Nah. Just a scam call.
No, I don't need a home security system.
I am a security system.
Must be some kind of system
if Captain Valor is selling it.
Uh, yeah.
He has an endorsement deal.
That guy will slap his name
on anything for a quick buck.
Sort of like
your Starling high tops.
That's not funny.
Starling, I'm starting to feel
like you're hiding something from me.
Okay. Here's the deal.
The superheroes know I let
you go when you were Chaos,
and they are not happy about it.
So, now I'm on the run.
What? No.
I'm not gonna let them
kick you out because of me.
It's not that bad. At least,
now I can go by my real name.
Judith.
Yeah, but you're all alone.
Wait, Judith?
Look, it was hard enough
when my family went on the run,
but at least we had each other.
I can't let them do this to you.
Jake, as much as it hurts,
I'd rather deal with that
than risk you or your
family getting locked up.
This is why I didn't wanna tell you
because I knew this
is what would happen.
Oh, it's him again.
He's probably trying to
talk me into coming back.
Give it up, Captain
Valor. I'm not gonna
Starling.
I talked to the
Superhero Tribune Council
and they're willing to drop
all charges against you.
You can retain your superhero status.
Really? That's great.
There's only one thing you have to do,
turn Chaos over to us.
So you recommend the Chimichangas?
Well, it isn't Jake-Ling.
Yeah.
Calling you that cutesy couple name now
'cause I support this.
So, how'd your date go?
I think you both know how it went.
Considering it wasn't a date.
Starling told me everything.
Great. Because pretending to support
this unholy union was
giving me an ulcer.
Look, Jake,
I know you're probably
upset about what happened
but, please just don't
do anything irrational.
Amy's right. I'll be fine.
Like I told you, staying a superhero
isn't worth it if it means
I have to turn you in.
I can never do that to you.
I know.
Which is why I'm gonna do it for you.
- What?
- What?
Call Captain Valor.
I'm turning myself
in to the superheroes.
Come on.
Give me that key invisible fake bro.
You can run, but you can't hide.
I guess you can hide.
Just show yourself!
Not even close.
How do I stop Bad Jake?
I can't do this forever.
You just have to sneak past him
and grab the mirror
and use it to change us back to normal.
Easier said than done.
Bad Jake is 10 times
stronger than the real Jake,
and I've never battled anyone before.
Colby, you're the
strongest villain there is.
You have more powers than he does.
You can easily take him down.
You just have to outsmart him.
Yeah, you're right. I can do this.
Hey, Bad Jake,
over here.
Whoa, what's going on?
It's another power.
You have regeneration.
Of course I do.
I'm the chosen one.
Don't just stand there. Prove it.
I did it.
I took him down.
Guess again.
Oh, yeah.
You just got chosen oned.
And you thought The Mirror was bad.
What's going on down here?
Mom and Dad got shrink-rayed,
and I just took down Bad Jake.
Oh, okay.
Wait. We were in lockdown
mode. How'd you get in?
I pulled the banana.
Well, that's a security flaw.
Jake, you don't have to do this.
Sorry, Judith. My mind's made up.
And I changed my mind.
We're going back to Starling.
Look, you sacrificed for me.
Now I'm gonna do the same for you.
I knew you would say that
which is why we had no
choice but to change the plan.
What do you mean?
- Is that Bad Jake?
- Yep.
We put him in your backup
suit so we can swap you out
and send him in your place.
And he's okay with it?
Well, I did wanna stay
here and destroy you
but now that I have this device,
it'll much more fun to go
destroy a bunch of superheroes.
He doesn't know. That's
a TV remote, does he?
- Hmm.
- Not a clue.
Go get 'em, Bad Jake.
Starling.
It's Captain Valor. Hide.
Ah, there you are.
Nice civilian clothes.
I wanted to keep a low profile.
They are slim-fit joggers.
So stretchy.
Which is great because
I never skip leg day.
Well, here's Chaos as requested.
You did the right thing.
You'll still be punished
for your actions,
but you'll retain your superhero status.
Thanks, Captain V.
And who knows, maybe I
can tempt them to talk
with a couple of pairs
of slim fit joggers.
Come on, let's go.
Uh, I just need a minute.
But go ahead. I'll catch up to you.
We're not going anywhere. Hyah!
What's wrong with this
thing? It's not working.
I've been duped. You've
got the wrong guy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what all the supervillains say.
It worked.
Of course it did.
You know, just because
you're always trying
to follow my plans doesn't
mean they don't work.
I can't believe you two actually
teamed up to pull that off.
I think we really are friends now.
Uh-hmm. Yeah, I wouldn't go that far.
Fair enough.
So, frenemies?
Yeah, I'm fine with that.
Well, until you tick me off again.
It works both ways, honey.
I'm best friends
with Starling's frenemy.
So what does that make me?
- Creepy.
- Creepy.
I should get going.
Will I ever see you again?
Time will tell.
All right. Wrap it up, Judith.
And just like that, we're
back to being enemies.
You okay?
Let me guess. Still
thinking about Starling?
Yeah.
But as long as I know she's
safe, that's all that matters.
And as long as I know
that she's far away,
that's all that matters to me.
Hey, I just wanna say thanks.
You helped someone you
completely despise for me.
That's the nicest
thing you've ever done.
You're right.
I should probably go
do something horrible
to balance it out.
Hey, did you guys get rid of Bad Jake?
Yeah. We'll never see him again.
Oh, good. That dude super annoying.
He shrunk Mom and Dad.
What? Where are they?
So we agree?
If the kids don't come back,
we split this giant cheese ball.
What?
No. I found it.
Well, I dropped it.
Well, I licked it.
Oh, that's not a cheese ball.
to stop confusing those
twin sisters at school.
Ignore them both. Problem solved.
Uh-huh.
Are you even listening to me?
Uh-huh.
- Amy!
- Uh, see?
If you've been paying attention,
you would've seen that coming.
Sorry.
I was looking at that kid
over there in the hoodie.
He seem lonely.
And weird.
Which probably explains
the lonely part.
Maybe I should go over and say hi.
Oh, right. 'Cause when I see someone
clearly trying to avoid people,
my first instinct is
to always go and say hi.
Well, maybe they're shy,
like you when you first moved here.
I was not shy.
I was standoffish and hostile.
There's a difference.
I'm going over
to introduce myself.
- You can come or not.
- I choose not.
- You're coming.
- Okay.
Then why even give me a choice?
Hi there.
We wanted to welcome you to Valley View.
I'm Hartley.
See? I told you.
Just leave him alone.
Sorry to bother you.
Amy, wait.
Starling?
Starling? What are you doing here?
Did you finally come to your senses
and realize we should be besties?
No.
And I don't know how you got my number
but you need to stop calling.
What was with the disguise?
Shame of being a
superhero finally set in?
I came to warn you.
The superheroes received intel
that you and your family are on the run.
What?
I knew it.
She turned us in and Jake
fell right into her trap.
I didn't turn you in.
Come here.
The superheroes were going
through old security footage
from Centropolis and
they saw me save Jake
from falling off that building
back when he was still Chaos.
Well, you're a superhero.
What were you supposed
to do, let him fall?
Hmm? I would have had
that same moral debate.
It was the "not turning him in" part
that they had a problem with.
Now, the superheroes think
I'm helping your family hide out.
- So tell them you're not.
- I did.
But then, they confiscated my phone
and they found all of my
text messages with Jake
from the last few months.
Yikes!
How many kissy face emojis
do they have to sift through?
Three hundred and fifty-seven.
And then they questioned me,
but I refused to give you up,
so they banished me
from the superhero community forever.
Huh. I always thought you'd
grow old as a superhero.
You know, still flying around in the sky
but, like, 10 miles an
hour below the speed limit.
Wow. All those times I
tried to take you down,
and my brother ended up
doing it accidentally.
Technically, that's still a win for me.
And now that you know,
I should go start my new life on my own.
Wait,
what about your superhero family?
I had to leave them behind.
I didn't want them to get
in trouble for helping me.
Well, at least let me call Jake
so he can come and say goodbye to you.
No way.
If he finds out that they kicked me out
because of him, he'll wanna fight them
which could lead to bad
things for all of us.
I don't think Jake would
risk his family's safety.
By doing something stupid
to save someone else?
Yeah, he totally would.
I should go before he sees me.
Starling, wait.
We can't turn our backs on her.
The superheroes tossed her out
for protecting you and your family.
You're right.
We should kick in five
bucks each for a bus ticket.
That'll at least get her to Louisiana.
She needs our help.
Starling, you can stay with me
while you figure out your next move.
Oh, you can have my bed and
I'll take my sleeping bag.
It has your face on it.
Oh, you can have my pillow, too.
That also has your face on it.
I have a lot of stuff
with your face on it.
Okay. Fine.
But just until I make a plan
and Jake cannot know that I'm here.
Then you better hood up
'cause he just walked in.
Hey.
What's up with your friend?
Oh
uh, she's a table sniffer.
Yeah, apparently it's a thing.
Yeah, everyone's doing it.
Well, congrats, Amy, you're no longer
the weirdest one in Valley View.
Eva, honey,
I'm honored to have you
with the unveiling
of my latest creation.
Oh, well, it was either this
or reruns of house pet divorce court.
I can't sit through another
custody battle over a Corgi.
Check it out.
This device can shoot a laser
that will mimic the powers
of the greatest villains of our time.
You just choose the power you want
and this device will mirror it.
I call it The Mirror.
Wait, did you say The Mirror?
No, no. The Mirror.
The Mirror.
It's better on paper.
Don't you mean, The Paper?
Hey, Celia just stopped me
and said she's really upset at Jake
for what he did outside
her window this morning.
Hmm. Stop right there.
I don't wanna know what he was doing.
He was rearranging our garden gnomes
into very inappropriate poses.
Oh, that's both better and worse
than what I was thinking.
No, that's impossible.
Jake spent the morning LARPing with me.
So now we're all just
doing embarrassing things?
Celia insists it was Jake.
Or as she likes to call him,
"The boy that shakes
when he talks to me."
Oh, no.
There's only one explanation for this.
Bad Jake is back.
Hey, what do you mean he's back?
I thought you vaporized him.
Yeah. He may have escaped
before I had the chance
and I just didn't tell you.
But to be fair,
hiding things from you
wasn't my wedding vows.
Right. So now everyone thinks our son
is doing villainous
things around the town.
This could blow our secret.
Don't worry. I'll track him down.
I'll put him in my trusty nano-cuffs.
Even Bad Jake's super
strength can't break these.
Really? Then how did
Hartley break out of home
to go find Amy at Colossal Con?
Son, we've covered
this, helpful or hurtful?
Hurtful is always funnier.
Anyway, once I slapped
the nano-cuffs on Bad Jake,
we'll bring him down here.
We'll use The Mirror.
A name I standby by the way.
We'll vaporize him for good.
Cool. I can help track him down.
Shouldn't be too hard,
considering he's been wearing
the same clothes for
the past three months
and the same underwear.
Sorry, Colby. This is big boy stuff.
You just stand back and marvel
as your father saves the day once again.
Too bad you couldn't
do it the first time.
Then we wouldn't have to spend our day
chasing around Jake's creepy clone.
Again, Colby, helpful or hurtful?
Okay, Starling, coast is clear.
Do you really think this thing
is gonna hide me from Jake?
Oh, I know it will.
Every time my grandma wants me
to clean my room, I just slap
on this bush costume and hide outside.
She's never found me.
That explains a lot about you.
Where did you even
get this crazy costume?
Oh, I played a bush in
three different school plays.
The Valley View Times said it was like
they didn't even know I was there.
Nailed it.
I'm glad you two found each other.
Yeah. Well, anyway, I've
come up with some great ideas
to get you out of our lives quickly.
It all starts with you
strapped to a rocket
hurdling towards Mars.
Oh, if that doesn't work,
I have seven other ideas.
Do they all end with
me on another planet?
They do, yeah.
Look, well, I appreciate
all of your help.
I think it's best if I just head out.
The longer I stay here, the
more likely Jake will find me.
Oh, he's coming. Hide!
Hey, yo, peeps.
Everything off the chain?
Yeah, I hear it and I'll stop.
What are you up to?
Just bumped into Celia.
She's really mad at me.
But when I asked her why,
she just growled and said,
"Hands off my gnome, sicko!"
Did that bush just sneeze?
Is that bush wearing sneakers?
Yeah. Yeah.
It's a special bush native to Texas.
It's the, uh
the sneezing sneaker bush.
They're kind of endangered,
so if you try to touch it,
it's our civic duty to report you
to the local Fish and Game Commission
and trust me, no one
wants to go to fish jail.
Nope.
You're hiding something.
No, no.
Let me go!
No!
Starling?
Surprise!
Some people just aren't
cut out to be a bush.
Starling, what are you doing here?
Uh, she came to celebrate
Earth Day.
Yup. She loves the environment.
That is why we are both
dressed like native plants.
You're not dressed like a plant.
Ow!
I'm a cactus.
No offense, but your
credibility was shot
the moment you said
sneezing sneaker bush.
This is useless. We should
just tell him the truth.
- Jake, I'm here because
- I wanted to talk.
Yeah, I felt I felt so bad
about ruining your first
date at the junkyard
that I wanted to apologize to her
because
we are friends now.
Yeah.
Friends who don't touch each other.
Hands off the leaves.
Well, now, you two can finally go
on your first date together.
Yup.
That's why I'm here.
So I guess it wouldn't
make sense not to do it.
Oh, well, great.
Then I should go change
into something nicer.
Maybe you should, too.
I told you the trail of garden gnomes
would help us capture Bad Jake.
He just couldn't resist.
What we had to do is
spend $500 at Gnome Depot.
You had your freedom.
Can't believe you were dumb enough
to come right back to where you escaped.
You're the one who created me.
Doesn't that make you the dumb one?
You know what? I'll
answer this one for you.
Yes, the answer is yes.
Hey, why did you come back anyway?
Well, I was planning a destruction spree
but I didn't want lame
Jake to get all the credit.
So I came back to destroy him.
Plus, I kind of miss the guy who
spent four minutes raising me.
Aw, that's my boy.
Well, not really, but
I'll take the fake love.
Wanna play a round of golf
after I destroy your son?
Not sure. Eva, do we have
anything this afternoon?
Yeah.
Erasing a paper trail.
Oh, right, right, right.
Let's see, one second here.
Synthetic son,
don't worry, this won't hurt a bit.
Mostly because you're
a pile of fake flesh
and you can't feel pain.
Prepare to be vaporized.
You know, next time, you
might not wanna tell me
what you're gonna do before you do it.
Seriously? Prepare to be vaporized?
What does that even mean?
How does one prepared to be vaporized?
I don't know.
I was picturing a fetal
position, maybe some begging.
In my head, it was very dramatic.
I'll take that.
Oh, shrink ray.
Seems fun.
No, wait. On second thought,
it's a beautiful day for golf.
We could use the clubhouse.
You like BLTs?
Oh, looks like now
we can play mini golf.
Uh-uh. I just hit my growth spurt,
no way I'm going back.
- Where'd you go?
- Ha ha!
He ghosted you.
But technically he turned invisible
but the joke still works!
I don't have time for this.
I have another brother to take out.
Colby, activate the lockdown mode.
Ah, now you're trapped without the key.
Wait, what?
I made the door so secured,
not even a super strength
can break through.
I call it man cave mode.
Oh, big words for someone who
doesn't think things through!
Well, looks like if
I'm gonna get that key,
I'm gonna have to end up taking
out both brothers after all.
Where are you, Colby?
Over here!
No. Over here.
Over here.
On the bright side, at
least you finally have
a body to match the size of your brain.
Go ahead and order whatever you want.
I don't wanna brag, but I
do have an employee discount.
Oh, how much?
Okay, I lied. It comes
out of my paycheck.
I'm just so happy you're
back in Valley View,
like actually here with me.
I was convinced I'd never see you again
but now we can finally work
through things together.
No complications, no distractions.
Oh, Chimichangas are back on the menu.
Jake.
You're right. I'm sorry.
I haven't even asked about you.
How are things in the superhero world?
Great. You know still super-heroing.
Crime is up, so business is good.
- Do you have to get that?
- Nah. Just a scam call.
No, I don't need a home security system.
I am a security system.
Must be some kind of system
if Captain Valor is selling it.
Uh, yeah.
He has an endorsement deal.
That guy will slap his name
on anything for a quick buck.
Sort of like
your Starling high tops.
That's not funny.
Starling, I'm starting to feel
like you're hiding something from me.
Okay. Here's the deal.
The superheroes know I let
you go when you were Chaos,
and they are not happy about it.
So, now I'm on the run.
What? No.
I'm not gonna let them
kick you out because of me.
It's not that bad. At least,
now I can go by my real name.
Judith.
Yeah, but you're all alone.
Wait, Judith?
Look, it was hard enough
when my family went on the run,
but at least we had each other.
I can't let them do this to you.
Jake, as much as it hurts,
I'd rather deal with that
than risk you or your
family getting locked up.
This is why I didn't wanna tell you
because I knew this
is what would happen.
Oh, it's him again.
He's probably trying to
talk me into coming back.
Give it up, Captain
Valor. I'm not gonna
Starling.
I talked to the
Superhero Tribune Council
and they're willing to drop
all charges against you.
You can retain your superhero status.
Really? That's great.
There's only one thing you have to do,
turn Chaos over to us.
So you recommend the Chimichangas?
Well, it isn't Jake-Ling.
Yeah.
Calling you that cutesy couple name now
'cause I support this.
So, how'd your date go?
I think you both know how it went.
Considering it wasn't a date.
Starling told me everything.
Great. Because pretending to support
this unholy union was
giving me an ulcer.
Look, Jake,
I know you're probably
upset about what happened
but, please just don't
do anything irrational.
Amy's right. I'll be fine.
Like I told you, staying a superhero
isn't worth it if it means
I have to turn you in.
I can never do that to you.
I know.
Which is why I'm gonna do it for you.
- What?
- What?
Call Captain Valor.
I'm turning myself
in to the superheroes.
Come on.
Give me that key invisible fake bro.
You can run, but you can't hide.
I guess you can hide.
Just show yourself!
Not even close.
How do I stop Bad Jake?
I can't do this forever.
You just have to sneak past him
and grab the mirror
and use it to change us back to normal.
Easier said than done.
Bad Jake is 10 times
stronger than the real Jake,
and I've never battled anyone before.
Colby, you're the
strongest villain there is.
You have more powers than he does.
You can easily take him down.
You just have to outsmart him.
Yeah, you're right. I can do this.
Hey, Bad Jake,
over here.
Whoa, what's going on?
It's another power.
You have regeneration.
Of course I do.
I'm the chosen one.
Don't just stand there. Prove it.
I did it.
I took him down.
Guess again.
Oh, yeah.
You just got chosen oned.
And you thought The Mirror was bad.
What's going on down here?
Mom and Dad got shrink-rayed,
and I just took down Bad Jake.
Oh, okay.
Wait. We were in lockdown
mode. How'd you get in?
I pulled the banana.
Well, that's a security flaw.
Jake, you don't have to do this.
Sorry, Judith. My mind's made up.
And I changed my mind.
We're going back to Starling.
Look, you sacrificed for me.
Now I'm gonna do the same for you.
I knew you would say that
which is why we had no
choice but to change the plan.
What do you mean?
- Is that Bad Jake?
- Yep.
We put him in your backup
suit so we can swap you out
and send him in your place.
And he's okay with it?
Well, I did wanna stay
here and destroy you
but now that I have this device,
it'll much more fun to go
destroy a bunch of superheroes.
He doesn't know. That's
a TV remote, does he?
- Hmm.
- Not a clue.
Go get 'em, Bad Jake.
Starling.
It's Captain Valor. Hide.
Ah, there you are.
Nice civilian clothes.
I wanted to keep a low profile.
They are slim-fit joggers.
So stretchy.
Which is great because
I never skip leg day.
Well, here's Chaos as requested.
You did the right thing.
You'll still be punished
for your actions,
but you'll retain your superhero status.
Thanks, Captain V.
And who knows, maybe I
can tempt them to talk
with a couple of pairs
of slim fit joggers.
Come on, let's go.
Uh, I just need a minute.
But go ahead. I'll catch up to you.
We're not going anywhere. Hyah!
What's wrong with this
thing? It's not working.
I've been duped. You've
got the wrong guy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what all the supervillains say.
It worked.
Of course it did.
You know, just because
you're always trying
to follow my plans doesn't
mean they don't work.
I can't believe you two actually
teamed up to pull that off.
I think we really are friends now.
Uh-hmm. Yeah, I wouldn't go that far.
Fair enough.
So, frenemies?
Yeah, I'm fine with that.
Well, until you tick me off again.
It works both ways, honey.
I'm best friends
with Starling's frenemy.
So what does that make me?
- Creepy.
- Creepy.
I should get going.
Will I ever see you again?
Time will tell.
All right. Wrap it up, Judith.
And just like that, we're
back to being enemies.
You okay?
Let me guess. Still
thinking about Starling?
Yeah.
But as long as I know she's
safe, that's all that matters.
And as long as I know
that she's far away,
that's all that matters to me.
Hey, I just wanna say thanks.
You helped someone you
completely despise for me.
That's the nicest
thing you've ever done.
You're right.
I should probably go
do something horrible
to balance it out.
Hey, did you guys get rid of Bad Jake?
Yeah. We'll never see him again.
Oh, good. That dude super annoying.
He shrunk Mom and Dad.
What? Where are they?
So we agree?
If the kids don't come back,
we split this giant cheese ball.
What?
No. I found it.
Well, I dropped it.
Well, I licked it.
Oh, that's not a cheese ball.