Macgyver s01e16 Episode Script
Every Time She Smiles
The first time I got to ride on a merry-go-round, I was about 6 or 7.
I'd never seen anything like it.
It was a kind of magic.
Go to a merry-go-round anywhere in the world and you can see the same look in the kids' eyes.
It's magic.
It's a shame we have to grow up and lose it.
And I learned something up in the Swiss Alps.
I just shouldn't go skiing without a parachute.
Kind of busted up my vacation and my hand.
So when I got offered a free trip to beautiful Bulgaria, I grabbed it.
All I had to do was a little errand.
No sweat.
You should try the Gregory Mykel endgame.
- Do you know it? - I used to know him.
Knight to king's bishop three.
Protect your queen's right.
It is most important.
Usually is.
Think I'll just mail this postcard home.
Make a nice souvenir from my vacation.
We have risked our lives for what you have.
Checkmate! Guess you got me.
- Thanks for the game.
- Tell Dr Mykel my move is bishop to knight five.
I'll do that.
I've learned a lot.
American? - Yeah.
- Oh, you don't know how good it is to see someone from back home.
They're all foreigners here.
- Foreigners? - Sure.
Just look around.
I haven't spoken to an American in over a month.
I thought it was gonna be a trip staying here, but believe me, it's not.
Especially since I don't speak the language.
I'm Penny Parker.
You can remember that because it's got the same letter at the front of each name.
That's important theatrically, you know.
- Oh, yeah? - Sure.
Just think of it.
Farrah Fawcett, Tina Turner, Marilyn Monroe.
- Penny Parker.
- Yeah! You catch on quick.
MacGyver.
Did you break your hand? Does it hurt? Oh, it must.
I've never broken anything.
- It's getting better.
- Well, that's good.
Pleased to meet you, MacGyver.
Penny Parker's not my real name, of course.
I had it changed when I started modelling.
It really hasn't hurt my dancing career either.
That's originally why I came over here.
To dance, I mean.
You here on business? My troupe left last month, but I just couldn't.
I met this man.
He was unreal.
I mean, just to look at this man was to die.
I had to stay.
Oh, it was awesome for the first couple weeks, - but then it got kind of - Difficult? Yeah.
I mean, he was like my mother or something.
I couldn't go anywhere or do anything without him along.
I mean, I like a strong man, I really do.
So anyway, we had this talk.
Well, actually, it was more of a disagreement.
Well, really, it was kind of a fight, and I went blasting off and so - So it's over.
- I guess.
You know, you're very sensitive to pick that right up.
What? - You all right? - Sure.
Just hold my place in line.
- You didn't even say goodbye.
- Goodbye.
Would you give us some room? How can I make you reconsider? - I'm sorry.
You can't.
- Penny, I love you to distraction.
Oh, really? And just yesterday morning you were ready to kill me just because I smiled at that nice young officer.
Penny, when you smile at a man, it is already the beginning of the end.
For the man, I mean.
Well, I'm certainly not gonna give up smiling just so you won't get upset.
Very well.
I can't hold you against your will.
But if you insist on going, I must ask you to give me back the things I gave you.
- You mean the jewellery? - Penny, not so loud! - Well, you gave them to me.
- Well, on a temporary basis.
Certainly not as a farewell gift.
- Penny, I must have them back.
- That isn't fair.
Where did you put them? Get him! Wait! I know you're not gonna believe this, but I haven't the slightest idea where those came from.
You're right.
I don't believe you.
Wait a minute.
Why not? It's the truth.
Get him! What are you doing here? This is for women! Glad you guys showed up.
Handcuff them together and bring their things.
I'm sorry.
- Are you mad at me? - Why would I be mad at you? - Well, you missed your plane.
- Right.
- Then they took your luggage.
- Yeah.
And they think you stole the jewels.
- Yeah, that's right.
- And they have your passport.
I almost forgot that one.
Well, see, then you should be mad at me.
- All right, I'm mad at you.
- You really didn't have to tell me that.
You're right.
I'm sorry.
I had to put the jewellery in your pocket.
I had no choice.
Well, he gave it to me.
And I was just taking it along.
And besides, it's not worth all that much.
- How do you know that? - Well, because a guy with some government job who's got a shoebox for an apartment wouldn't give me real jewellery unless it wasn't real, right? If that's true, why is he still holding us now that he has it back? Penny Parker, you're holding something back.
It was just one ring.
How much could it be worth? If he'd asked me nicely, I would have given it back to him.
But he had to go and show up at the airport with all those policemen and make me look like some kind of criminal.
Hold it, wait a minute.
Okay, fine.
Why my pocket? Well, you were the closest one around.
All right.
Why hide it? Oh, I knew he'd try to take them from me.
He always does when he gets mad at me.
- What are you looking for? - I'm looking for a way out of here.
Well, why? You didn't do anything.
They'll probably let you go soon.
Maybe, but I can't afford to take that chance.
Besides, they've got something of mine.
- I want it back.
- So we're both in the same fix.
Grab that chair.
Well, why don't I get two chairs, and then we can both sit.
It's not for sitting.
Never mind the chair.
Excuse me.
Hey, that's good! Cheap wall.
We just poke our way right out of here.
It's a baggage conveyor belt.
There's no way I can just poke through this chicken wire.
Damn! It was a nice thought, though.
All right, bend these out.
We're gonna make them into a figure eight.
Well, what are you gonna do with a figure eight? You ever been to a rodeo? Sort of.
I was Queen of the Future Farmers once.
Later.
Later.
All right.
Good.
Now I know why you asked about the rodeo.
You're gonna lasso the conveyor belt.
I sure am gonna try.
Let's go.
What are you doing? I've gotta have my purse! - It's just like the ride at Disneyland.
- Will you keep your head down? Economy class.
Well, that was fun.
Now what? Good question.
Darned good question.
Taxi! Correct.
I want both their descriptions sent to all border posts and police patrols immediately.
They have escaped custody and are to be considered enemies of the state.
Ah, Stepan.
At ease.
At ease.
Well, if it's about the girl, uncle, I can explain.
Oh, yes, that's Penny Parker, the nightclub dancer.
What is a little interesting to me is why, after all the women you have known, you were trying to prevent this one from going home.
Well, she's a very special woman, uncle.
And I gave her some of Mother's jewellery, just to wear.
You did what? I gave her some of Mother's jewellery, just to wear.
Mother said you gave it to her and that it was just paste.
- So I figured - That paste is worth 700,000 leva! - What? - The jewels you loaned out to this bubbleheaded girl are part of the crown jewels of the German House of Hanover.
- Well, how did you get them? - It is unimportant how I got them.
- Who has them now? - I do.
All but the ring, but I'll get it back, uncle.
I promise.
You had better.
They are part of our security, which is already in jeopardy.
Our security? I am confused, uncle.
I will try to unconfuse you.
Some documents were stolen from this office and then returned.
We must assume the underground has them copied on microfilm.
The documents reveal the numbers of the Swiss bank accounts of some of us in this department.
This job pays almost nothing and demands our blood.
Just to live it is necessary to skim a little here and there.
And the jewellery is part of the skimming.
- A small part, yes.
- A small part? Seven hundred thousand leva.
I can see where that could be embarrassing.
It could be fatal.
- For both of us.
- But I have done nothing.
- I'm innocent.
- Perhaps.
But unfortunately, your name appears on one of those Swiss bank accounts.
- Number 1779, to be precise.
- They'll send us to Siberia.
Not if we recover the microfilm, which is the only evidence against us.
You have been monitoring the underground, have you not? Yes.
We identified a man named Burak.
He may be a contact man.
He spends his days playing chess in the park.
I let him run, hoping he'd lead us to the others.
Pull him in.
Persuade him to tell us what he knows.
- What if he won't talk? - He must talk, Stepan.
If he does not, you can forget about Siberia.
It's going to be a cigarette and a blindfold in the courtyard downstairs.
He must be made to talk.
You don't mean torture? I mean whatever is necessary.
You know, I never could learn to play chess.
Come! You are supposed to be out of the country.
What happened? Who is she? - She's a very close friend.
- Hi, I'm Penny - The militia are hunting you.
- Yeah.
- Could I borrow one of your earrings? - Sure.
- Now, where is? - Hey! I'll get you another one.
Where is the microfilm? - Safe.
- But where is safe? It's with a friend of hers.
Fortunately, he doesn't know what he has.
- This friend.
Does he have a name? - Stepan.
Stepan Frolov.
Major Stepan Frolov? State Security? - Nephew of General Petrovich? - Yeah, that's him.
You said some guy with a government job.
Figures.
Can I keep these for a souvenir? Why does Frolov want her? He gave her some kind of jewellery.
Now he wants it back.
This jewellery.
Can I see it, please? Frolov will do anything to get this back.
Oh, come on.
It can't be worth that much.
It's worth a fortune.
It is part of the treasure that his uncle looted from the state.
How do you know that? It was evidence in the documents we got from his office safe.
You mean Stepan gave me jewellery his uncle stole? And uncle wants it kept secret, right? That and many other secrets.
It is all on the microfilm we placed in your hands today.
Holy cow! Can you hide her till I get it back? You're a spy! Just a couple of hours.
That's all I need.
I do know a place.
Follow me.
- Are you really a spy? - I'm just doing a favour for a friend.
Now follow me, but stay behind.
- There they are! - Go! Go! Get them! Stop them! There, on the carousel! It's hopeless.
They've got us.
Not yet, they don't.
To get the brass ring, they've gotta get on the merry-go-round.
Why aren't we hiding? We are.
You mean, like, nobody would think of looking for us right here in the open? That's the idea.
Okay, that's it.
Stepan's apartment.
He only has three rooms.
I dated a regional supervisor once.
You could've put Stepan's whole apartment in his living room.
But it was really too big.
Stepan's is kind of, you know, cosy.
He had all these great records.
Wait a minute.
What about security? Oh.
Well, only government officials live there.
I've seen two or three militiamen walking around.
Oh, and there's a guardhouse on the corner.
Wonderful.
All right.
I want you to stay here until I come back.
Okay? Well, why his apartment? I mean, maybe our stuff's at his office.
Penny, think about it.
Those jewels could put him into a work farm for the rest of his life.
Now, I'm not sure, but chances are, he'd wanna keep them away from headquarters.
At least that's what I'm counting on.
Wow, I bet old General Petrovich is petrified.
Yeah.
MacGyver? You are coming back for me, aren't you? I mean, you're not just gonna get your stuff and bug out on me? - No, I wouldn't do that.
- I didn't really think you would.
I just have this habit of trusting people, and, well, sometimes I think it's a mistake.
Penny, you say what you think, and you do what you say.
That's not such a bad policy in my book.
Maybe.
Sometimes you can get hurt.
Well, no one became a great woman living in a vacuum.
Am I a great woman? You got all the makings.
That's the nicest thing anybody ever said to me.
Well, you're the nicest person I've ever said it to.
That's for good luck.
We need all the luck we can get.
You are wasting my time with this stupid attitude of yours.
I want answers.
Your name is Anton Burak.
Widower, no children.
But you do have a sister, Marta.
With a husband and three children.
They are safe in a place where even you cannot find them.
So do what you will.
I will tell you nothing.
They are living in the mountains at the home of a shepherd named Patinoff.
This is a picture of your sister.
And, of course, the children.
These were taken yesterday.
The 9-year-old, he looks like he is a good soccer player.
Maybe not with broken legs.
- And here - Stop! The man came to me with the password.
Then he came back with the girl.
Name? Description? American.
Very pretty.
He called her "Penny.
" I don't know her family name.
I don't know the man's name.
It is not important, Mr Burak because I think my nephew does.
Is that right, major? His name is MacGyver.
So she has been using you, Stepan.
She must be an American agent.
- I cannot believe this.
- The microfilm must be among the things you took from her.
Where are they? - In my apartment.
- Well, get it! Now! And, Stepan, if you should happen to run into this MacGyver again - shoot him.
- Yes, uncle.
Bouncing around Bulgaria with penny parker reminded me of playing dominoes.
With every move, something else might fall.
But the thing is, it all started so simply.
In for the chess game, out with the information.
And now here I am scaling the wall of a heavily guarded government building and breaking into the apartment of a major in the secret police.
Simple, right? I'll tell you what's simple.
Me.
For getting into that first conversation with penny parker.
But what else could I do? I mean, a guy just can't be rude.
I mean, how was I to know? How was I to know? My postcard.
I think my luck's starting to change.
MacGyver! Hey, are you in there? It's okay.
It's me, Penny.
Let me in.
What are you doing here? Well, I'm sorry, but the place kept filling up with the soldiers, and they were coming over to my table and buying me drinks.
So I came here.
How did you get out of the place? Well, I went to the ladies' room and climbed out the window.
Of course you did.
Why do I ask those questions? Well, I figured I'd better come over here or how else would you find me? And you know what else? Right next to the place was this cute little shop that had the cutest little dress in the window.
Wait a minute! How'd you get into the building? I came in the front door downstairs.
The doorman knows me.
Oh, and you had to sneak in so nobody would know you were here.
- And now I - It's okay.
It's all right.
Did you find what you were looking for? Yes, I found what I'm looking for.
Everything but the passports.
Now let's get out of here before your friend comes home.
- Oh, he never gets home till real late.
- Good.
- Usually.
- Right.
Come on.
I was hoping we wouldn't find you.
I could be shot for even thinking this.
And I could be shot for just being here.
So it's time to start finding a way out.
I want you to get away with this, at the expense of 700,000 leva but You're not getting away with this and you know it, Stepan.
Now shall we talk about your American friend - and the whereabouts of my ring? - Yeah.
It wasn't even yours.
Stolen.
Involved in a whole bunch of really illegal stuff! Oh, Penny, how did we get ourselves into all this? My sentiments exactly.
Kitchen chemistry has gotta be the way to go here.
See? There you go again.
You and all your My recipe calls for a deep cooking pot, a dash of pest control, four measured cups of soap flakes, all garnished with tile cleaner and left to steep.
If you don't watch out, you're gonna be just like your uncle.
I mean, it was all perfectly simple.
Well, suddenly spying and stealing and jewellery and I wasn't spying.
What do you call it? Now what I need is a time-delay fuse.
A healthy ladle of lard will do for starters.
Covered with a single layer of newspaper.
Sprinkled with crystal of oven cleaner.
And all left to marinate under a soft flow of natural gas.
So I do want the ring back, and I also want your accomplice, Mr MacGyver.
- He's not my accomplice.
- There's no use to lie, Penny.
I know about him.
You used me.
The two of you were working together as spies.
I'm not a spy! We met for the first time at the airport.
I was just standing in line.
If that is true, he has nothing to fear from us.
And neither do you.
You can speak out freely.
Where is he? Right here.
Mr MacGyver, I commend you.
May I take this as a surrender? Not just yet.
Look outside the window.
- Give up? - Sort of.
The building is surrounded.
Well, I certainly would hope so, or you wouldn't be doing your job.
Then you must also know that there is no escape for you.
It's over.
The information that was passed on to you, I take that now, please.
No, I don't think so.
I'm not a man who likes violence, Mr MacGyver.
That's great.
Neither do I.
- Move away, Penny.
- What are you gonna do? Well, the cliché thing to be done here is for him to blow my kneecaps off.
If necessary.
Are you both crazy? Come on, Frolov, let her go.
She's told you the truth.
And capturing me, an enemy of the state, ought to be enough, right? What have you done? Burnt the roast! Sorry.
Penny, grab a bathrobe.
We'll mingle with the tenants.
A bathrobe.
I thought I said, a bathrobe.
This is the nicest one I have.
There's Stepan's car.
- I'm gonna have to hot-wire it.
- Maybe not.
It was on the dresser.
Amazing! They will try to make it to the Greek border.
I have alerted our border stations.
They have a full description of both fugitives.
- And your car, sir.
- Good.
But not good enough.
Now, with the gasoline they have, they should run out somewhere in that area.
Now, I want men stationed out of sight at every gasoline station in that circle.
Then I want our people to search every farm tract from here to here, especially the turnoffs to the main highway.
Understood? Yes, sir.
There is no way they can get through now, sir.
There is always a way.
We just have to make certain they won't find it.
You know, it's so beautiful up here.
It's so peaceful.
Yeah, just like in a storybook, right? You know, I really like you.
You understand me.
We're on the same wavelength.
Well, that worries me.
It also worries me that we're running on an empty gas tank.
Well, why don't we just get some more? Oh, sure, sure, we can just drive right on into a gas station in the middle of the night and ask them to fill up a KGB car.
Hey, I know where we might get some.
I'm all ears.
Car two, have you reached the western sector yet? - We are almost at the checkpoint, sir.
- Good.
Make sure you have enough men.
I don't want them to slip through.
I'm heading east.
I have an idea I want to check out.
Penny.
There's no gas can in there.
Well, gee, that's where it was the last time.
Nice duds.
It's all I could find.
Miss Parker, whose place is this anyway? Stepan's uncle.
Stepan used to bring me here on weekends.
We'd ride motorcycles in the hills and Wait a minute! I remember now.
About the gas.
The can was almost empty, so Stepan took it down to get it refilled.
- I'm sorry.
- No problem.
No problem.
Everyone forgets something once in a while.
You're sweet, but I Wait a minute! There's that machine that they use to plough with.
- A tractor? - Yeah! They keep it in the shed on the other side of the hill.
Don't tractors run on gas? They've been known to.
Penny, Penny, Penny.
Look, you're terrific.
I mean, you're really great.
- But I'll go, all right? - But, MacGyver No, no, no, no, I insist.
It's my duty as Oh, swell! You're not gonna shoot us, are you? Shoot you? Why? For stealing my car? Destroying my career? Collaborating with a spy? - Stealing state secrets? - Oh, come on, Stepan.
You and I both know this has nothing to do with state secrets.
We will not discuss the nature of the things missing.
The main thing is, I've found you.
Yeah, by the way, how did you find us? I estimated how far the gas in my car would take you.
And this place was within range.
I took a chance that Penny would remember it.
I did.
Stepan, we had a nice time.
And I don't think very much of the way you're using it against me! For the first time in my life, I'm thinking like a professional.
By what? Defending corruption in your government? Nice.
I have no choice.
I don't think that's quite true.
It's a matter of conscience, Steve.
- You do have one of those, don't you? - I thought he did.
Once.
And here's the ring you wanted so badly.
And whatever you think, I'm not a spy.
I wouldn't even know how to do it.
Penny! Believe me, all I ever wanted was to keep you with me.
Well, then why don't you let her go, Steve.
In fact, why don't you let us both go.
- Are you crazy? - It's been rumoured.
I must ask you to give me the microfilm.
I would do as he asks.
You have done well, Stepan.
Much better than I had thought.
Now finish the job.
- Sir? - Kill them.
What? But why? Because I am compromised as long as they live.
You know, Stepan, I think you're a part of that compromise.
No good, Mr MacGyver.
Stepan has only to gain by my favour and my position.
He poses no threat to me.
But Penny, she's done nothing.
I believe that now.
It is not what she has done.
It is what she knows, Stepan.
Success always has its price.
I want no witnesses, uncle.
- Where are your men? - Good.
Already beginning to think like a bureaucrat.
They're at the crossroads.
They have orders to wait there for ten minutes, then come.
At which time, we will tell them it was necessary to shoot these spies - who tried to escape.
- Smart.
That's real smart.
Yes, he is.
He's always been real smart.
Stepan! Nice shot, Steve! Oh, Stepan, you're wonderful! Kids, I hate to break this up, but we do still have to get past the general's men.
Let's take the general's car.
I grew up not far from here.
There is a small road that leads around the main highway.
They'll never see us.
- You're really coming with us? - Actually, I can even pay our way.
I have Swiss bank account number 1779.
Let's hope you live long enough to spend it.
They escaped in my car.
Did you see that? They can only be heading for the border.
Quickly! We've got company.
You think this thing can outrun that command car? I don't think so.
I was afraid of that.
Penny, I want you to take this wheel.
Drop it in behind that truck up there.
You ready? It's like a real spy thing, isn't it? - What are you gonna do? - Just get as close to that truck - as you can.
- All right.
Gosh, this is just like the movies.
Now, the only way I saw to keep us ahead of this game was to work up some kind of highway hazard.
That's where the hose comes in.
You see, diesel exhaust is loaded with hydrocarbons.
Now, if you mix hydrocarbons with water, you get what scientists call immiscible liquid.
Immiscible, that means water and oil don't mix.
Go faster! - All right, come on! - We're coming, MacGyver.
Now, this hydrocarbon and water thing I've explained is a fact.
But, in order to get it to work right, I needed enough diesel oil floating on top of enough water.
It's kind of tricky.
Of course, one never knows unless one tries.
Just look at us, will you? Aren't we something? - You did great.
- I can't believe I did it! Okay, under this fence we should be in Greece.
All right, let's go.
Howdy! Do you wish to enter Greece? I was kind of hoping we were already there.
Passports, please.
You know, somehow I knew you were gonna ask that.
Constantine! Is it you? Penny.
- Penny Parker! - Hi! Penny Parker.
Every time she smiles.
We should have known.
I'd never seen anything like it.
It was a kind of magic.
Go to a merry-go-round anywhere in the world and you can see the same look in the kids' eyes.
It's magic.
It's a shame we have to grow up and lose it.
And I learned something up in the Swiss Alps.
I just shouldn't go skiing without a parachute.
Kind of busted up my vacation and my hand.
So when I got offered a free trip to beautiful Bulgaria, I grabbed it.
All I had to do was a little errand.
No sweat.
You should try the Gregory Mykel endgame.
- Do you know it? - I used to know him.
Knight to king's bishop three.
Protect your queen's right.
It is most important.
Usually is.
Think I'll just mail this postcard home.
Make a nice souvenir from my vacation.
We have risked our lives for what you have.
Checkmate! Guess you got me.
- Thanks for the game.
- Tell Dr Mykel my move is bishop to knight five.
I'll do that.
I've learned a lot.
American? - Yeah.
- Oh, you don't know how good it is to see someone from back home.
They're all foreigners here.
- Foreigners? - Sure.
Just look around.
I haven't spoken to an American in over a month.
I thought it was gonna be a trip staying here, but believe me, it's not.
Especially since I don't speak the language.
I'm Penny Parker.
You can remember that because it's got the same letter at the front of each name.
That's important theatrically, you know.
- Oh, yeah? - Sure.
Just think of it.
Farrah Fawcett, Tina Turner, Marilyn Monroe.
- Penny Parker.
- Yeah! You catch on quick.
MacGyver.
Did you break your hand? Does it hurt? Oh, it must.
I've never broken anything.
- It's getting better.
- Well, that's good.
Pleased to meet you, MacGyver.
Penny Parker's not my real name, of course.
I had it changed when I started modelling.
It really hasn't hurt my dancing career either.
That's originally why I came over here.
To dance, I mean.
You here on business? My troupe left last month, but I just couldn't.
I met this man.
He was unreal.
I mean, just to look at this man was to die.
I had to stay.
Oh, it was awesome for the first couple weeks, - but then it got kind of - Difficult? Yeah.
I mean, he was like my mother or something.
I couldn't go anywhere or do anything without him along.
I mean, I like a strong man, I really do.
So anyway, we had this talk.
Well, actually, it was more of a disagreement.
Well, really, it was kind of a fight, and I went blasting off and so - So it's over.
- I guess.
You know, you're very sensitive to pick that right up.
What? - You all right? - Sure.
Just hold my place in line.
- You didn't even say goodbye.
- Goodbye.
Would you give us some room? How can I make you reconsider? - I'm sorry.
You can't.
- Penny, I love you to distraction.
Oh, really? And just yesterday morning you were ready to kill me just because I smiled at that nice young officer.
Penny, when you smile at a man, it is already the beginning of the end.
For the man, I mean.
Well, I'm certainly not gonna give up smiling just so you won't get upset.
Very well.
I can't hold you against your will.
But if you insist on going, I must ask you to give me back the things I gave you.
- You mean the jewellery? - Penny, not so loud! - Well, you gave them to me.
- Well, on a temporary basis.
Certainly not as a farewell gift.
- Penny, I must have them back.
- That isn't fair.
Where did you put them? Get him! Wait! I know you're not gonna believe this, but I haven't the slightest idea where those came from.
You're right.
I don't believe you.
Wait a minute.
Why not? It's the truth.
Get him! What are you doing here? This is for women! Glad you guys showed up.
Handcuff them together and bring their things.
I'm sorry.
- Are you mad at me? - Why would I be mad at you? - Well, you missed your plane.
- Right.
- Then they took your luggage.
- Yeah.
And they think you stole the jewels.
- Yeah, that's right.
- And they have your passport.
I almost forgot that one.
Well, see, then you should be mad at me.
- All right, I'm mad at you.
- You really didn't have to tell me that.
You're right.
I'm sorry.
I had to put the jewellery in your pocket.
I had no choice.
Well, he gave it to me.
And I was just taking it along.
And besides, it's not worth all that much.
- How do you know that? - Well, because a guy with some government job who's got a shoebox for an apartment wouldn't give me real jewellery unless it wasn't real, right? If that's true, why is he still holding us now that he has it back? Penny Parker, you're holding something back.
It was just one ring.
How much could it be worth? If he'd asked me nicely, I would have given it back to him.
But he had to go and show up at the airport with all those policemen and make me look like some kind of criminal.
Hold it, wait a minute.
Okay, fine.
Why my pocket? Well, you were the closest one around.
All right.
Why hide it? Oh, I knew he'd try to take them from me.
He always does when he gets mad at me.
- What are you looking for? - I'm looking for a way out of here.
Well, why? You didn't do anything.
They'll probably let you go soon.
Maybe, but I can't afford to take that chance.
Besides, they've got something of mine.
- I want it back.
- So we're both in the same fix.
Grab that chair.
Well, why don't I get two chairs, and then we can both sit.
It's not for sitting.
Never mind the chair.
Excuse me.
Hey, that's good! Cheap wall.
We just poke our way right out of here.
It's a baggage conveyor belt.
There's no way I can just poke through this chicken wire.
Damn! It was a nice thought, though.
All right, bend these out.
We're gonna make them into a figure eight.
Well, what are you gonna do with a figure eight? You ever been to a rodeo? Sort of.
I was Queen of the Future Farmers once.
Later.
Later.
All right.
Good.
Now I know why you asked about the rodeo.
You're gonna lasso the conveyor belt.
I sure am gonna try.
Let's go.
What are you doing? I've gotta have my purse! - It's just like the ride at Disneyland.
- Will you keep your head down? Economy class.
Well, that was fun.
Now what? Good question.
Darned good question.
Taxi! Correct.
I want both their descriptions sent to all border posts and police patrols immediately.
They have escaped custody and are to be considered enemies of the state.
Ah, Stepan.
At ease.
At ease.
Well, if it's about the girl, uncle, I can explain.
Oh, yes, that's Penny Parker, the nightclub dancer.
What is a little interesting to me is why, after all the women you have known, you were trying to prevent this one from going home.
Well, she's a very special woman, uncle.
And I gave her some of Mother's jewellery, just to wear.
You did what? I gave her some of Mother's jewellery, just to wear.
Mother said you gave it to her and that it was just paste.
- So I figured - That paste is worth 700,000 leva! - What? - The jewels you loaned out to this bubbleheaded girl are part of the crown jewels of the German House of Hanover.
- Well, how did you get them? - It is unimportant how I got them.
- Who has them now? - I do.
All but the ring, but I'll get it back, uncle.
I promise.
You had better.
They are part of our security, which is already in jeopardy.
Our security? I am confused, uncle.
I will try to unconfuse you.
Some documents were stolen from this office and then returned.
We must assume the underground has them copied on microfilm.
The documents reveal the numbers of the Swiss bank accounts of some of us in this department.
This job pays almost nothing and demands our blood.
Just to live it is necessary to skim a little here and there.
And the jewellery is part of the skimming.
- A small part, yes.
- A small part? Seven hundred thousand leva.
I can see where that could be embarrassing.
It could be fatal.
- For both of us.
- But I have done nothing.
- I'm innocent.
- Perhaps.
But unfortunately, your name appears on one of those Swiss bank accounts.
- Number 1779, to be precise.
- They'll send us to Siberia.
Not if we recover the microfilm, which is the only evidence against us.
You have been monitoring the underground, have you not? Yes.
We identified a man named Burak.
He may be a contact man.
He spends his days playing chess in the park.
I let him run, hoping he'd lead us to the others.
Pull him in.
Persuade him to tell us what he knows.
- What if he won't talk? - He must talk, Stepan.
If he does not, you can forget about Siberia.
It's going to be a cigarette and a blindfold in the courtyard downstairs.
He must be made to talk.
You don't mean torture? I mean whatever is necessary.
You know, I never could learn to play chess.
Come! You are supposed to be out of the country.
What happened? Who is she? - She's a very close friend.
- Hi, I'm Penny - The militia are hunting you.
- Yeah.
- Could I borrow one of your earrings? - Sure.
- Now, where is? - Hey! I'll get you another one.
Where is the microfilm? - Safe.
- But where is safe? It's with a friend of hers.
Fortunately, he doesn't know what he has.
- This friend.
Does he have a name? - Stepan.
Stepan Frolov.
Major Stepan Frolov? State Security? - Nephew of General Petrovich? - Yeah, that's him.
You said some guy with a government job.
Figures.
Can I keep these for a souvenir? Why does Frolov want her? He gave her some kind of jewellery.
Now he wants it back.
This jewellery.
Can I see it, please? Frolov will do anything to get this back.
Oh, come on.
It can't be worth that much.
It's worth a fortune.
It is part of the treasure that his uncle looted from the state.
How do you know that? It was evidence in the documents we got from his office safe.
You mean Stepan gave me jewellery his uncle stole? And uncle wants it kept secret, right? That and many other secrets.
It is all on the microfilm we placed in your hands today.
Holy cow! Can you hide her till I get it back? You're a spy! Just a couple of hours.
That's all I need.
I do know a place.
Follow me.
- Are you really a spy? - I'm just doing a favour for a friend.
Now follow me, but stay behind.
- There they are! - Go! Go! Get them! Stop them! There, on the carousel! It's hopeless.
They've got us.
Not yet, they don't.
To get the brass ring, they've gotta get on the merry-go-round.
Why aren't we hiding? We are.
You mean, like, nobody would think of looking for us right here in the open? That's the idea.
Okay, that's it.
Stepan's apartment.
He only has three rooms.
I dated a regional supervisor once.
You could've put Stepan's whole apartment in his living room.
But it was really too big.
Stepan's is kind of, you know, cosy.
He had all these great records.
Wait a minute.
What about security? Oh.
Well, only government officials live there.
I've seen two or three militiamen walking around.
Oh, and there's a guardhouse on the corner.
Wonderful.
All right.
I want you to stay here until I come back.
Okay? Well, why his apartment? I mean, maybe our stuff's at his office.
Penny, think about it.
Those jewels could put him into a work farm for the rest of his life.
Now, I'm not sure, but chances are, he'd wanna keep them away from headquarters.
At least that's what I'm counting on.
Wow, I bet old General Petrovich is petrified.
Yeah.
MacGyver? You are coming back for me, aren't you? I mean, you're not just gonna get your stuff and bug out on me? - No, I wouldn't do that.
- I didn't really think you would.
I just have this habit of trusting people, and, well, sometimes I think it's a mistake.
Penny, you say what you think, and you do what you say.
That's not such a bad policy in my book.
Maybe.
Sometimes you can get hurt.
Well, no one became a great woman living in a vacuum.
Am I a great woman? You got all the makings.
That's the nicest thing anybody ever said to me.
Well, you're the nicest person I've ever said it to.
That's for good luck.
We need all the luck we can get.
You are wasting my time with this stupid attitude of yours.
I want answers.
Your name is Anton Burak.
Widower, no children.
But you do have a sister, Marta.
With a husband and three children.
They are safe in a place where even you cannot find them.
So do what you will.
I will tell you nothing.
They are living in the mountains at the home of a shepherd named Patinoff.
This is a picture of your sister.
And, of course, the children.
These were taken yesterday.
The 9-year-old, he looks like he is a good soccer player.
Maybe not with broken legs.
- And here - Stop! The man came to me with the password.
Then he came back with the girl.
Name? Description? American.
Very pretty.
He called her "Penny.
" I don't know her family name.
I don't know the man's name.
It is not important, Mr Burak because I think my nephew does.
Is that right, major? His name is MacGyver.
So she has been using you, Stepan.
She must be an American agent.
- I cannot believe this.
- The microfilm must be among the things you took from her.
Where are they? - In my apartment.
- Well, get it! Now! And, Stepan, if you should happen to run into this MacGyver again - shoot him.
- Yes, uncle.
Bouncing around Bulgaria with penny parker reminded me of playing dominoes.
With every move, something else might fall.
But the thing is, it all started so simply.
In for the chess game, out with the information.
And now here I am scaling the wall of a heavily guarded government building and breaking into the apartment of a major in the secret police.
Simple, right? I'll tell you what's simple.
Me.
For getting into that first conversation with penny parker.
But what else could I do? I mean, a guy just can't be rude.
I mean, how was I to know? How was I to know? My postcard.
I think my luck's starting to change.
MacGyver! Hey, are you in there? It's okay.
It's me, Penny.
Let me in.
What are you doing here? Well, I'm sorry, but the place kept filling up with the soldiers, and they were coming over to my table and buying me drinks.
So I came here.
How did you get out of the place? Well, I went to the ladies' room and climbed out the window.
Of course you did.
Why do I ask those questions? Well, I figured I'd better come over here or how else would you find me? And you know what else? Right next to the place was this cute little shop that had the cutest little dress in the window.
Wait a minute! How'd you get into the building? I came in the front door downstairs.
The doorman knows me.
Oh, and you had to sneak in so nobody would know you were here.
- And now I - It's okay.
It's all right.
Did you find what you were looking for? Yes, I found what I'm looking for.
Everything but the passports.
Now let's get out of here before your friend comes home.
- Oh, he never gets home till real late.
- Good.
- Usually.
- Right.
Come on.
I was hoping we wouldn't find you.
I could be shot for even thinking this.
And I could be shot for just being here.
So it's time to start finding a way out.
I want you to get away with this, at the expense of 700,000 leva but You're not getting away with this and you know it, Stepan.
Now shall we talk about your American friend - and the whereabouts of my ring? - Yeah.
It wasn't even yours.
Stolen.
Involved in a whole bunch of really illegal stuff! Oh, Penny, how did we get ourselves into all this? My sentiments exactly.
Kitchen chemistry has gotta be the way to go here.
See? There you go again.
You and all your My recipe calls for a deep cooking pot, a dash of pest control, four measured cups of soap flakes, all garnished with tile cleaner and left to steep.
If you don't watch out, you're gonna be just like your uncle.
I mean, it was all perfectly simple.
Well, suddenly spying and stealing and jewellery and I wasn't spying.
What do you call it? Now what I need is a time-delay fuse.
A healthy ladle of lard will do for starters.
Covered with a single layer of newspaper.
Sprinkled with crystal of oven cleaner.
And all left to marinate under a soft flow of natural gas.
So I do want the ring back, and I also want your accomplice, Mr MacGyver.
- He's not my accomplice.
- There's no use to lie, Penny.
I know about him.
You used me.
The two of you were working together as spies.
I'm not a spy! We met for the first time at the airport.
I was just standing in line.
If that is true, he has nothing to fear from us.
And neither do you.
You can speak out freely.
Where is he? Right here.
Mr MacGyver, I commend you.
May I take this as a surrender? Not just yet.
Look outside the window.
- Give up? - Sort of.
The building is surrounded.
Well, I certainly would hope so, or you wouldn't be doing your job.
Then you must also know that there is no escape for you.
It's over.
The information that was passed on to you, I take that now, please.
No, I don't think so.
I'm not a man who likes violence, Mr MacGyver.
That's great.
Neither do I.
- Move away, Penny.
- What are you gonna do? Well, the cliché thing to be done here is for him to blow my kneecaps off.
If necessary.
Are you both crazy? Come on, Frolov, let her go.
She's told you the truth.
And capturing me, an enemy of the state, ought to be enough, right? What have you done? Burnt the roast! Sorry.
Penny, grab a bathrobe.
We'll mingle with the tenants.
A bathrobe.
I thought I said, a bathrobe.
This is the nicest one I have.
There's Stepan's car.
- I'm gonna have to hot-wire it.
- Maybe not.
It was on the dresser.
Amazing! They will try to make it to the Greek border.
I have alerted our border stations.
They have a full description of both fugitives.
- And your car, sir.
- Good.
But not good enough.
Now, with the gasoline they have, they should run out somewhere in that area.
Now, I want men stationed out of sight at every gasoline station in that circle.
Then I want our people to search every farm tract from here to here, especially the turnoffs to the main highway.
Understood? Yes, sir.
There is no way they can get through now, sir.
There is always a way.
We just have to make certain they won't find it.
You know, it's so beautiful up here.
It's so peaceful.
Yeah, just like in a storybook, right? You know, I really like you.
You understand me.
We're on the same wavelength.
Well, that worries me.
It also worries me that we're running on an empty gas tank.
Well, why don't we just get some more? Oh, sure, sure, we can just drive right on into a gas station in the middle of the night and ask them to fill up a KGB car.
Hey, I know where we might get some.
I'm all ears.
Car two, have you reached the western sector yet? - We are almost at the checkpoint, sir.
- Good.
Make sure you have enough men.
I don't want them to slip through.
I'm heading east.
I have an idea I want to check out.
Penny.
There's no gas can in there.
Well, gee, that's where it was the last time.
Nice duds.
It's all I could find.
Miss Parker, whose place is this anyway? Stepan's uncle.
Stepan used to bring me here on weekends.
We'd ride motorcycles in the hills and Wait a minute! I remember now.
About the gas.
The can was almost empty, so Stepan took it down to get it refilled.
- I'm sorry.
- No problem.
No problem.
Everyone forgets something once in a while.
You're sweet, but I Wait a minute! There's that machine that they use to plough with.
- A tractor? - Yeah! They keep it in the shed on the other side of the hill.
Don't tractors run on gas? They've been known to.
Penny, Penny, Penny.
Look, you're terrific.
I mean, you're really great.
- But I'll go, all right? - But, MacGyver No, no, no, no, I insist.
It's my duty as Oh, swell! You're not gonna shoot us, are you? Shoot you? Why? For stealing my car? Destroying my career? Collaborating with a spy? - Stealing state secrets? - Oh, come on, Stepan.
You and I both know this has nothing to do with state secrets.
We will not discuss the nature of the things missing.
The main thing is, I've found you.
Yeah, by the way, how did you find us? I estimated how far the gas in my car would take you.
And this place was within range.
I took a chance that Penny would remember it.
I did.
Stepan, we had a nice time.
And I don't think very much of the way you're using it against me! For the first time in my life, I'm thinking like a professional.
By what? Defending corruption in your government? Nice.
I have no choice.
I don't think that's quite true.
It's a matter of conscience, Steve.
- You do have one of those, don't you? - I thought he did.
Once.
And here's the ring you wanted so badly.
And whatever you think, I'm not a spy.
I wouldn't even know how to do it.
Penny! Believe me, all I ever wanted was to keep you with me.
Well, then why don't you let her go, Steve.
In fact, why don't you let us both go.
- Are you crazy? - It's been rumoured.
I must ask you to give me the microfilm.
I would do as he asks.
You have done well, Stepan.
Much better than I had thought.
Now finish the job.
- Sir? - Kill them.
What? But why? Because I am compromised as long as they live.
You know, Stepan, I think you're a part of that compromise.
No good, Mr MacGyver.
Stepan has only to gain by my favour and my position.
He poses no threat to me.
But Penny, she's done nothing.
I believe that now.
It is not what she has done.
It is what she knows, Stepan.
Success always has its price.
I want no witnesses, uncle.
- Where are your men? - Good.
Already beginning to think like a bureaucrat.
They're at the crossroads.
They have orders to wait there for ten minutes, then come.
At which time, we will tell them it was necessary to shoot these spies - who tried to escape.
- Smart.
That's real smart.
Yes, he is.
He's always been real smart.
Stepan! Nice shot, Steve! Oh, Stepan, you're wonderful! Kids, I hate to break this up, but we do still have to get past the general's men.
Let's take the general's car.
I grew up not far from here.
There is a small road that leads around the main highway.
They'll never see us.
- You're really coming with us? - Actually, I can even pay our way.
I have Swiss bank account number 1779.
Let's hope you live long enough to spend it.
They escaped in my car.
Did you see that? They can only be heading for the border.
Quickly! We've got company.
You think this thing can outrun that command car? I don't think so.
I was afraid of that.
Penny, I want you to take this wheel.
Drop it in behind that truck up there.
You ready? It's like a real spy thing, isn't it? - What are you gonna do? - Just get as close to that truck - as you can.
- All right.
Gosh, this is just like the movies.
Now, the only way I saw to keep us ahead of this game was to work up some kind of highway hazard.
That's where the hose comes in.
You see, diesel exhaust is loaded with hydrocarbons.
Now, if you mix hydrocarbons with water, you get what scientists call immiscible liquid.
Immiscible, that means water and oil don't mix.
Go faster! - All right, come on! - We're coming, MacGyver.
Now, this hydrocarbon and water thing I've explained is a fact.
But, in order to get it to work right, I needed enough diesel oil floating on top of enough water.
It's kind of tricky.
Of course, one never knows unless one tries.
Just look at us, will you? Aren't we something? - You did great.
- I can't believe I did it! Okay, under this fence we should be in Greece.
All right, let's go.
Howdy! Do you wish to enter Greece? I was kind of hoping we were already there.
Passports, please.
You know, somehow I knew you were gonna ask that.
Constantine! Is it you? Penny.
- Penny Parker! - Hi! Penny Parker.
Every time she smiles.
We should have known.