Mighty Med (2013) s01e16 Episode Script

(Beeps) Oh, you got a video chat request from Jordan.
Kaz, don't answer it! Jordan can't know we're in Mighty M my my my! If it isn't Jordan! Why hello! Hey.
Where are you guys? Um, in my room.
I redecorated.
I went for a post-modern hospital motif.
Very ugly.
I like it.
So are you guys coming to the "Gargoyles and Goblets" tournament at the domain tonight? Everyone who's no one is gonna be there.
Ooh, is that Jordan? Hi, Jordan! Ooh, is that Connie? (Beeps) I'm sure I'm probably just imagining it, but sometimes I get the feeling that Jordan doesn't like me.
Oh, don't be silly.
You're not imagining it.
She can't stand you.
What? How can she not like me? Skylar, don't take it personally.
Jordan doesn't like anyone.
She's planning a "sour sixteen" party.
Nobody's invited.
But everyone has to like me! I'm Skylar Storm.
I was adored by millions! I miss that.
So I swear, by the sacred rings of caldera, I shall not rest until Jordan is, like, totally my BFF! Oh, good, our shift is over.
Can't want to go home, get in bed, and sleep until Monday.
Boys, I need you to work the night shift, which means you won't sleep till Monday.
But I'm exhausted.
And what will I tell my parents about where I am? I can't tell them that I work here.
Just tell your parents you're sleeping at my house.
Oh, I get it then you tell your parents you're sleeping at Oliver's house.
Oh, no, I don't need to.
My parents have 11 kids.
They won't even know I'm missing.
Oh, and one more thing: You may have heard that the night shift can be a little scary.
But you'll be fine Unless a once-in-a-lifetime lunar eclipse creates the most dangerously horrifying night ever.
But what are the odds of that? By the way, the odds are ninety-nine out of a hundred.
Every day's an adventure You never know by the looks on our face At the school when we enter Leave class early, work at 3:30 Hit the comic store, read up before the journey All these new issues and superpowers If we didn't have to work, we'd be here for hours Everybody say that we shouldn't worry But have you ever seen superheroes on a gurney? Will we save the world today? you never know Will we all be safe today? you never know Will we fly away or stay? you never know But you know we're Mighty Med, team up and let's go! Saving people that save people after classes We flip the page then jump to action They call us normo, normally fantastic Seeing superheroes that we only imagined This type of life, you got to have fight Put up your fists and fight for what's right Never can tell, what we see is out of sight Do the same thing tomorrow that we did tonight Will we save the world today? You never know, will we all be safe today? You never know, will we fly away or stay? You never know, but you know we Mighty Med Team up and let's go! Ugh! Nothing's happening! Who knew a lunar eclipse would be so boring? How long have we been here? Six minutes.
Hey, Neocortex, I haven't seen you since I almost turned your brain into a nuclear bomb.
(Clears throat) What's wrong? Whenever I try to read someone's mind, they just fall into a daydream-like trance.
And I was kind of hoping to talk to doctor anyone-but-you.
Oh, yeah, it's his night off.
And it's pronounced doctor "anywanbuchoo.
" But you're in luck.
We just got a new device that creates a mind-link, so we can see into a patient's mind to help diagnose their medical mysteries.
Let me just show you what's been happening.
Don't try it on me! What if you fry my brain? Try it on someone who serves no function.
I serve no function.
What do you need? I just wanted to use this to look into your thoughts and know what's going on inside that head of yours.
Okay, but don't make fun of my head.
We all know it's embarrassingly tiny.
(Cheering and applause) You like my head.
You really, really like my head.
(Cheering and applause) Oh, it was only a daydream.
How could a head so small be filled with dreams so big? You're causing people to get lost in their greatest fantasies.
Using this thing is like reading Oliver's diary, only interesting! I need to figure out how to cure Neocortex.
And also how to work that tiny lock on my diary.
What? Don't fix him! We finally have something fun to do! Ooh, Neocortex, put lizard man into a daydream.
I bet his fantasy involves Godzilla, but like a really hot Godzilla in a bikini.
(Snurgles) Privy, milords! And miladies.
In honor of tonight's mysterious lunar eclipse, we christen the first midnight tournament of "Gargoyles" "and Goblets!" Oh, I love G&G! It's a great way to get together with like-minded people and pretend to disembowel them.
Aren't you a cutthroat one? Question mark.
I like to say my punctuation dash-dash it's my charming little quirk.
Period.
Remind me to disembowel you first.
Ohh.
Sorry I'm late.
Connie? What are you doing here? Jordan? I didn't know you like G&G! We have so much in common, like people who are friends do! 'Kay, listen up, Jolly Parton.
Find your own crowd.
I've been strangers with some of these people for years.
"Jolly Parton"? Cool! You gave me a nickname, like people who are friends do! Ha! you have a friend What's it like? Question mark.
You gotta tell her she can't play! (Gasps) For shame! The world of gargoyles and goblets is open to all who believeth! And those who can payeth the six dollar entry fee! I only have five dollars.
Both: We'll taketh it! All right! Ready for some quality girl time? Can I get a "what what"? "Whateth whateth"? During your battle with the reatomizer, he must have scrambled the neural connections in your brain.
(Loud whisper) Put him in a trance! Wow, you are really bad at whispering.
I know! (Whooshing) What was that? Uh, that was me.
I farted And then that happened.
(All yawning) Your psychic burst must have raised everyone's Melatonin levels.
We're all getting drowsy.
We need to figure out a cure for Neocortex before he gets worse! Let's not rush to cure anybody.
Who are we to say who lives And who has their privacy invaded for my amusement? (Laughs) What's wrong with alley cat? (Beeping) Okay.
Okay, she's just having a nightmare.
Instead of jumping from building to building and landing on her feet like she usually does, she's falling into a bottomless pit.
It's a very common and harmless aaah! What happened? Okay, that bottomless pit, it turns out it had a bottom.
(Monitor flatlining) No.
She has no brain activity! And no pulse! That means she's Horace: Dead.
I left my charger here and now my cell phone is completely dead.
What's goin' on? Neocortex's powers are malfunctioning and now alley cat is dead! Oh! Okay, yeah, was dead.
Fortunately, one of her powers is that she has nine lives.
So she's got eight lives left.
(Monitor flatlining) (Monitor resumes beeping) Yeah.
Correction: Seven lives left.
So, instead of putting people into fantasies, now you're putting them into nightmares? Yeah, and then when alley cat died in her nightmare, she did in real life, too.
Does that mean the same thing is gonna happen to everyone that was exposed to your blast that falls asleep? That sounds about right.
We need to figure out a way to cure Neocortex! But until we do, we have to make sure no one falls asleep! (Lullaby playing) (Yawns) Whoops.
Given the circumstances, that was a rather unfortunate choice of ringtones.
We need to keep everyone awake, or else they'll die in their nightmare and then in real life! Hey, no, no, no! Come on! Wake up! No, no, no.
No! This way.
There you go.
(Phone chiming) Guys! My mom is calling me on video chat! I can't ignore it because then she'll worry and show up at your house! But if I answer it, she'll see that I'm here instead! I never should have lied to my parents.
Don't panic, I planned for this.
Commence operation I planned for this.
My mom will never believe that this is your room.
There.
That's better.
(Phone chiming) Okay, pretend like you're sleeping.
(Yawning) Hey, mom.
You woke me up.
I can't talk right now.
Kaz is sleeping.
(Snoring) See? Good night.
All right, she bought it.
Kaz, stop fooling around.
Come on.
Oh, no.
You're really sleeping! Kaz, please! You have to wake up or you'll die! Kaz! Lady Jordan rolls a six, releasing her from the cave of Algamor! And as she's exits into the darkness, she sees a woman of unearthly beauty.
(High voice) I Am Ethelia! Queen of the border bridge.
All who cross must pay the toll, the price to be determined by an extra roll.
(Annoyed) Great, now I'm rhyming.
Ohh! I don't have a token of transport! Then you shan't cross! Death to the snarky tomboyish maiden! Have no fear, lady Jordan! I would like to give you my elixir of healing, because it's the friendly and likeable thing to do.
Wow.
Thanks, Connie.
In return.
.
I'd like you to have my potion of strength.
Oh, thank you, Jordan.
See how well we're getting along? Yeah.
You're getting a long face.
Because you're a donkey now! (All gasp) That wasn't a potion of strength That was a changeling spell.
All: Oooh Yeah, you shoulda read the card first.
But now you can't read it, 'cause you're a donkey! Oooh! Burn! Sad face emoticon.
(Noisemaker toots) Horace! Kaz fell asleep and I can't wake him up! Is there any way we can use the mind-link device so I can help Kaz before his nightmare destroys him? The mind-link device isn't working! The lunar eclipse has caused all our technology to malfunction! Even our most important piece of equipment.
See? Nothing! I haven't brushed in over an hour! Neocortex, you can project your consciousness into other people's minds, and you can read my mind.
Could you combine those powers and project my consciousness into Kaz's dream? Ahh.
My powers are messed up right now, but I can try.
What's the worst that could happen? Yes, of course, but I meant what's the worst that could happen to me.
I can't lose my best friend, so I'm just gonna have to take that chance.
Wait! Oliver.
In case anything happens to you I want to put down these newspapers.
I just waxed these floors.
Just send me in before he says anything else.
(Whoosh) (Pulsations) Neocortex, if you can hear me, are you sure this is a deadly nightmare? Kaz is just taking a test.
At worst it seems like a mildly bad dream.
Oliver: Oh Never mind.
Also aaaaah! Warriors and scribes, sorcerers and I can't do this any longer.
Break's over.
Only three nerds are left: Connie, Jordan, Bryan with a "y.
" Before we start up, I have a question.
How do you get someone to like you? The answer is quite simple.
We like the people who are like ourselves.
That's why I like Wallace.
And I like Clyde.
And why? We're able to always finish each other's sent--erpieces made of pinecones.
Oh! So to get Jordan to like me, I should be more like her.
Thanks! That's not what I meant at all.
Me neither.
(Blows) (Blows) Hey, look! We shake our dice the same way! We sure have a lot in common.
What's it gonna take to make you leave me alone? Oh, finally! The power-stealing potion.
And I use it on you! (All gasp) Both: Oh, snappeth.
Now you have no powers at all.
Just like that loser, Skylar Storm.
What.
Did.
You.
Say? ISaid I know what you said! That's it.
No more Mr.
nice donkey.
Clyde: The donkey rears its legs and delivers a most devastating kick! Lady Jordan reels! Then she pulls out her mace of doom and heaves it mightily! Oh! But the donkey catches it in her mouth with her giant donkey buck teeth! The donkey hurls it back from whence it came! But lady Jordan dodges it in time.
Now the stupid, dirty donkey charges like a bull that thinks it's a donkey.
She butts lady Jordan with her long, ugly donkey head.
She's fallen into a pit of poisonous quicksand! With my last breath I wield my magical whip of grasping! If I roll a perfect twenty.
Ahh.
.
A perfect twenty! (Makes whooshing sound) (Gasps, groans) She pulled you in, you're both dead.
Bryan, you're the winner.
Yes! I am the lord of the gargoyles! Exclamation point! Why am I even strangers with that guy? Class is in session! Today's lesson: Electricity! Kaz, quick.
Think of Megahertz inside of a cage.
What? Why? Just do it! Grrr! Grrr! How did I do that? What's going on? And why is my hand a rainbow trout? The good news is, this is only a nightmare.
The bad news is, if Megahertz kills you, you'll die in real life.
You have the power to do anything you think you can do if you focus on it.
I can? Then I know exactly what to do.
How is that going to help? It always helps to have a cool coat.
(Electricity crackling) Kaz, quick.
Get in the locker.
You ticked off the wrong half-human half-cyborg substitute teacher! (Growls) (Groaning) Oliver! He's too powerful! Help me! I can't.
I'm not really here.
You're on your own.
You're right.
I have to rely on myself.
Dude, I could use a hand here.
You got it, Kaz.
(Growls) (Growls) That Was Awesome! Kaz is alive! Well done, boys! Hey.
Thanks for being there for me, Oliver.
Anytime, buddy.
Just say the word.
What word? I don't know.
"Help," I guess.
Before we start celebrating, we have a problem.
Kaz: Everyone's asleep! Sorry.
My party horn broke.
And this shoe horn makes no noise whatsoever! We have to go into their nightmares and save them! We don't have any time! All we can do is hope for a miracle! Oh.
That was easy.
The lunar eclipse must have been what was messing with my powers because I can read minds clearly now.
You're bored again, aren't you? I'm so bored! Nothing cool has happened in, like, twenty seconds! Ya know, I never really liked you 'cause I thought you were a goody-goody, but you're much tougher and meaner than I ever imagined.
Aw.
Thank you! That means a lot to me coming from someone as insensitive and cold-blooded as you.
Aw.
Thank you! I feel weird.
Maybe I'm tired or maybe it's the lunar eclipse, but I-I feel Friendly? Yes! Ya know, I don't know why I'm admitting this to you, maybe I'm tired, maybe it was the lunar eclipse, but You're actually Clyde.
I knew it! Because I can't see anything! So much better.
Right?