Perils of Penelope Pitstop (1969) s01e16 Episode Script

Game of Peril

Help! Starring those seven rollicking rescuers: The Anthill Mob, their courageous car, Chug-a-Boom and that villain of villains, The Hooded Claw.
Penelope Pitstop, heiress to a vast fortune, is in perpetual peril from her fortune-seeking guardian, Sylvester Sneekly who, unknown to her, is really The Hooded Claw.
But foiling this fiend's foul plots are Penelope's ever-present protectors: The Anthill Mob.
I'll get you, Penelope Pitstop.
When we last saw Penelope, she was on a scavenger hunt and had found the first item on her list: a unicycle.
Why, it has a hidden motor, and I'm taking off like a shot to oblivion.
Everybody, look! Penelope's going off the edge of a cliff.
Oh, dear! I do believe I'm falling to my doom.
Don't worry, Penelope.
I brought along my unicycle rescue wire.
Everybody hold tight.
How about that! The unicycle wheel catches the wire and Penelope slides to safety.
Thanks ever so ever, boys.
- What's this? A saw! - Help! Oh, no! That hooded gopher-grabber's grabbed our gal.
But what's that fiend got planned for her in this old blacksmith's shop? An old blacksmith's anvil, what else? If you'll notice, Pitstop that 10,000-pound anvil you're tied under is held up by a 10-cent woolen rope.
And it was my dime that paid for it, you cheapskate.
You won't miss it, Pitstop.
See this hungry little moth? When he eats through the woolen rope you and the anvil will fall and smash down on the rolling platform.
Then, Pitstop, you'll be known as Flatstop! Get it? Tallyho! So, as Penelope roars down the rocky country road those ever-ready rescuers race to the rescue.
Penelope's gonna be smashed flat.
Oh, no, she's not.
'Cause we're gonna save her.
Step on it, Snoozy.
Snoozy! Wake up and watch where you're going! Right, Clyde.
We're going to crash.
We'll never catch her.
She's going too fast.
I'll stop her, Clyde, I'll stop her.
Little old me is safe again! Blast! Cheat! Foul! Blast! Listen, Penelope, we better come along with you and help you with that list.
- Why, I think that's a good idea.
- Good.
What's next on the list? The Rare Crimson Avuncular: A flower that grows only on Mount Mishmash.
Mount Mishmash, huh? What are we waiting for? Let's go! Later, at Mount Mishmash Here we are, Penelope.
- Wait for me, fellows.
I shan't be long.
- Right.
She looks like a bride doll climbing a wedding cake.
Yeah, wedding cake.
Slowly, Penelope climbs the rugged peak after the rare flower unaware of the fate that awaits her.
She's about to pluck her last posy.
- It's a pity to pluck it.
- Surprise! - Does this mean I'm in peril? - What else? And have I got a peril for you.
She's taking an awful long time to pick one flower.
Maybe it has a very tough stem.
- Let's go and find out.
- Right, Clyde.
Yeah, right, Clyde.
But up above, the Bully Brothers see The Anthill Mob approaching.
Let's give them the old mountain goat welcome routine.
Right? Meanwhile, inside the mountain hideout I suppose you're wondering why I brought you here.
Don't keep me in suspense, you fiend.
I haven't got all day, you know.
With villainous pleasure.
At any moment now, a sunbeam will shine through that hole and onto a nesting hen, causing her to lay her morning egg.
The egg will then drop through the nest and fall down the chute: Kersplat! Into the hot frying pan.
Then that hibernating bear will smell the egg and, thinking it's time to get up, will pull the frying pan toward him which will unlatch the door beneath you and you'll drop 1,000 feet through a tunnel onto a bed of steel spikes.
How's that grab you? I hope the law grabs you, you viper.
You sure know how to hurt a person.
Farewell! So, as Penelope waits helplessly for that nesting hen to lay its egg our seven little heroes continue their hapless search on Mount Mishmash.
Penelope! Where are you? But also on Mount Mishmash, the Bully Brothers get ready to do some smish-smashing.
We'll smish-smash them.
Let's go.
Look out! It's a wild mountain goat! We're surrounded.
Everybody on my goat-avoider pogo stick.
Now hop! Nice going! We got away without a scratch! Hey! What happened? What happened? You crash landed in the elevator trap.
This must be our lucky day.
But luck is running out for Penelope because the sun is shining in on the chicken.
And the chicken lays its egg.
There she is! Hurry, boys! That bear is hungry as a bear! Oh, no.
Too late.
Or is it? Okay, make with the human chain! I got her! And The Claw fails again by scant inches! What's next on your list, Penelope? Well, I must get an undersea snapshot of a whale.
- Is it possible? - Let's find out.
Go on, Chug-a-Boom.
Your water wings will keep you afloat.
Chug-a-Boom's afraid of the water.
You wouldn't want me to lose the scavenger hunt, would you, Chuggy dear? There she blows.
It's a whale of a whale.
Wait for me, boys.
I'll get that picture of that little old whale and be right back.
Right, Penelope.
I'll take several snaps to make sure.
But out of the murky water speeds a strange submarine straight for Penelope! - All aboard.
- Help! That sounded like Penelope, yelling, "Help! Help! " Yeah.
Let's go! Here comes the whale! - Retreat! - Oh, no! It looks like the mob has got a whale of a problem.
Leaving our Penelope in a lot of trouble! You mean a lot of big trouble.
With a capital "T," and "T" stands for torpedo which I shall fire above water into space.
It will come down into an old volcano and explode.
This will reactivate the volcano into eruption and you'll have a "lava-ly" time, my dear.
That's easy for you to say.
Bomb voyage! Fire one.
Up goes Penelope to her date with destruction.
Poor Penelope plies her perilous path to her date with destruction in the old volcano.
While back in the whale It's darker in here than the inside of a whale's stomach.
Yeah, and it's cold.
I just happened to have along my smudge pot heater.
We'll soon be snug as a bug in a whale's stomach.
Look, Clyde, we're out of the whale! But we're not out of the water spout.
Look, it's Penelope on that torpedo! She's headed straight for the volcano.
- We've got to save her! But how? - Easy.
With my torpedo-propeller reverso-boomerang wrench.
I throw it thus.
It attaches itself to the torpedo propeller then turns it in the opposite direction causing the torpedo to return and the rescue is made.
I'm safe! Thank you, fellas! Now, how do we get off a whale spout? See that bridge? That's how.
So once again, Penelope continues her scavenger hunt.
What's next on your list, Penelope? A home-run baseball from today's big game at The Bolo Grounds.
Let's go get it.
The big game is on as Penelope waits patiently in the bleachers for a home run.
Hit the ball a resounding thwack! I like baseball better than golf.
Why, Dum Dum? Because running those 18 bases in golf tires me out.
Me, too.
The Home Run King is at bat and wow, it's a homer over the fence! - Wait here, fellows.
I'll go get it.
- Right, Penelope.
But Penelope is beaten to the ball by The Hooded Claw.
I was the best ballplayer at Evil Tech.
Golly-goo! I caught a home run ball.
Who wants to buy it? I'll give you a shiny penny for it, you poor, sweet, little old urchin.
Okay, ma'am, but first, stand on this "X" mark.
My, what an odd request.
There, now let me have it.
You heard her, Bully Brothers.
Let her have it.
Right, Claw.
Oh, no! The Bully Brothers drop a safe toward the unsuspecting Penelope! But what's this? A street elevator? What luck! Penelope is safe from that safe.
That was a stupid place to put an "X" mark.
I'll give you two shiny pennies for the ball.
Only if you stand on this "X" mark.
There.
Now let me have it.
You heard her again, Bully Brothers.
Let her have it.
Right.
Blast! They would forget to close the window.
I'll give you 5 cents for it and not a shiny penny more.
It's a deal.
It slipped out of my hand, ma'am.
I'll get the ball, little boy.
My, it landed in the elevator of this wrecked building.
And I'm gonna make a wreck out of you.
Hello there, Penelope.
The Hooded Claw.
So that was just a trick of yours.
That's right.
And you still owe me a nickel for the ball.
A deal's a deal.
- All I have is a dime.
- I'll take it and give you change.
How clever of you.
- Here's your change, my dear.
- Why, you short-changed me! What did you expect? Honesty? Now enough of this small talk.
I've got a peril to do.
If you'll notice, Pitstop, I've tied you to this steel beam.
When the elevator comes down the blade will cut the rope holding you, and you will drop 40 stories into the gravel-crushing machine below.
I'm afraid the jig is up.
A crowd is gathering in the street.
I'm prepared even if the police show up.
But The Hooded Claw isn't prepared for The Anthill Mob.
And here they come now! There she is! In peril as usual.
Help! We'll save you, Penelope! Stand back! Just some movie people shooting The Perils of Penelope.
See? There's the cameraman and the director.
- Action.
Roll them.
- Goodbye forever, my dear.
Slowly the blade descends.
My! Here comes the little old blade! What will we do? We can't get through! Simple.
It's time again for our Comedy Cop uniforms.
Help! Make way for the Comedy Cops' big rescue scene.
Let them through, folks.
What a funny group.
You better hurry, fellows, because the blade just cut the rope and Penelope plunges to certain doom below! - Help! - Keep smiling, Penelope, we'll save you with my heroine-catching instant trampoline! Oh, no! Penelope's bounced back up into the clutches of The Hooded Claw.
Grab him! - Don't let him get away! - Blast! - We got him surrounded.
- So have we.
They got The Claw.
Let's scram.
Officer, arrest this man.
He is The Hooded Claw.
You mean he's an actor playing The Hooded Claw.
Of course.
I'm Lon Changey.
The man of a thousand disguises.
Watch.
Remember me as the Quarterback of Notre Dame? And as the Birdman of Razzmatazz? Twenty-three, skiddoo! All right, folks, break it up.
The show's over.
We almost had The Hooded Claw.
Too bad.
You still have a scavenger hunt to finish, remember? Yes, and if I don't get the last item on the list I'll lose the hunt.
Well, what is it? The Hooded Claw's hat and cape.
I guess you lose the game.
No, she don't.
I grabbed them during one of his quick changes.
Why, Dum Dum, you're a little old dear! Shucks.
The scavenger hunt is over, and Penelope wins! Did you hear that, Mr.
Claw? Penelope wins! Only till next time, believe me only till next time.
Help! I'll get you, Penelope Pitstop.

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