The Garfield Show (2008) s01e16 Episode Script

1
-[Garfield snoring]
-[alarm rings]
[upbeat theme song playing]
-[Garfield] Hee-hee!
-[remote clicks]
[man] And the halibut is the largest
of the flatfish,
found in both the North Pacific and
Garfield, I'm impressed.
I didn't think you liked
educational programs and yet here you are,
fascinated by one
and unable to take your eyes off the set.
Fish! Beautiful, delicious fish.
Halibut can grow as large
as 900 pounds, like this one.
Get me that fish! Get me that fish
and an equal weight of French fries.
-[phone rings]
-I'll get it.
I must have seafood.
I crave seafood. I need seafood.
-[Odie] Ohh.
-[Jon] Oh! Hi, Liz!
-[Odie] Ta-da!
-[Garfield] Huh?
"Captain Barnacle's ocean treat
doggie delight."
This is not seafood. This is a can.
See, Odie? A can.
Put it in the water. See if it swims.
[Jon] Your fish?
In this house?
Fish? Did he say fish? He said fish.
The man said fish. I heard him say fish.
[Liz] It's just while I'm out of town
visiting my mother.
I need someone to take care of them.
I don't think that would be
a good idea, Liz.
-Why not?
-Well, for one thing,
Garfield's putting out tartar sauce
and lemons.
Should I bread them? Fry them?
Scampi is so delicious.
Come on, John, you can get Garfield
to behave himself.
I'll bring my fish in the morning.
If you say so, Liz. Bye.
Garfield! Liz is leaving her pet fish here
while she's out of town.
You will leave them alone or else
Have no fear, Arbuckle. I'll behave.
I won't eat Liz's fish.
I'll treat them with total respect.
[Odie grumbling]
Not now, Odie. Can't you see
I'm busy lying through my teeth?
I'm having trouble sleeping.
Maybe I'll try counting sheep.
One, two, three, four
This isn't working.
I know.
One, two, three, four
This is so much better.
[snoring] Five Five
[rooster crows]
I didn't know you owned so many fish, Liz.
[snoring]
[Liz] It's been a hobby for years.
Three schools are enough for me.
I would like some more trout, though.
[Jon] Ohh! Ahh
Sounds like fish.
[Garfield laughs]
That is the most beautiful buffet
I've ever seen in my life!
-[Liz] See you in a week.
-Have a good trip.
And don't worry about your fish.
I had a talk with Garfield and I have
every confidence he'll leave them alone.
[horn honks]
[chuckles]
I've got to stop Garfield
from eating all the fish.
Now, would you be a better appetizer
or a main course?
You look more like a side dish.
And you're kind of sweet-looking.
I'll save you for dessert.
[Jon snarls]
You will not lay a paw on Liz's fish.
Of course not. That's why I have a net.
Do not touch the fish. Do you hear me?
Do not touch the fish.
If you harm so much as a fin,
you'll never see lasagna
in this house again.
[snarls]
Gee! He sounds like he means it.
Alright then. I can control myself.
I will leave this room and not come back
while the fish are here.
[sighs]
Five seconds. That's three seconds longer
than I thought I'd last.
You'll do for a start.
[gulp] Mmm! Not bad.
Aaah! I didn't think one little fish
could be so fattening.
That was a puffer fish!
The kind that swells up.
Help! Somebody help me!
Or put me in a parade or something!
[air hissing]
Whoaaaa!
I'd better watch what I eat.
I don't know what kind of fish you are,
but you look very tasty.
-[sparks zapping]
-Owwwww!
Owwwww!
[Garfield laughs]
[thud!]
[fish clapping]
Ugh!
Huh? [chuckles]
"Brazilian electric dancing fish,
similar to electric eel"
Okay. It's seafood I want and it's seafood
I'm gonna get. I need a menu.
[growls]
"Canadian spritzer fish."
Wonder what he does.
Okay, now we know what
a Canadian spritzer fish does.
"Australian seltzer fish."
Let's see what it says about
the Australian seltzer fish.
Huh?! Yaaaaa!
"The Australian seltzer fish
is a close relative
of the Canadian spritzer fish."
I should have known.
Alright! Your turn, greenie!
Let's see what you are.
Here you are! "Japanese judo fish."
Oh, no.
[fish] Hyaah!
[Garfield shrieking]
[wailing]
[fish laughs maniacally]
Oh, yeah? Well, you won't laugh at this.
Yaaaaa! [chomp!]
Hey, he wasn't bad.
Let's see what he is, or was.
"The flying fish of Framistan!"
-Help!
-[airplane motor revving]
Help!
Help!
No, don't worry, Liz.
Garfield isn't bothering your fish.
[Garfield] Yaaaaaa!
In fact, I just saw him flying by.
-Flying by?
-[Odie whimpers]
Whoaaaaa!
Mmm! Mmm! Yum!
I just figured it out.
All of these things that are happening
to me, they couldn't happen.
This has to be a dream.
Oh, I sure hope this is a dream.
[fish squeaks]
[gasps]
All rise for his honor,
the Honorable Oliver Octavius.
Oh, my.
Order in the fish court!
Bailiff, who is on trial today?
Garfield the Cat, Your Honor.
Either this is a dream or I've somehow
learned to breathe underwater.
Garfield the Cat is accused
of eating fish.
[gasping]
Garfield Cat, how do you plead?
Well, maybe I ate a few fish.
Seven thousand
three hundred and twenty-two fish.
Well, that's not a lot. I mean,
some of them were minnows and shrimp.
You! You fish-eater, you!
Yes, yes, I admit it! I ate the fish!
I ate a lot of fish!
I even ate fish with chips!
Fish with chips and malt vinegar!
If I spare your life, will you promise
never to eat another fish?
I said, if I spare your life,
will you promise
never to eat another fish?
I'm thinking it over!
I've heard enough!
Jury, what do you say?
Guilty!
Garfield Cat, you have been found guilty
by a jury of your dinner.
I hereby sentence you to Larry.
Larry? Who's Larry?
He is Larry.
-Help! Help! Oh!
-[doorbell rings]
[Jon] Oh, hi, Liz. Come on in.
[Liz] I brought my fish, as we discussed.
Her fish?
[Jon] We'll put them on the table.
Do you think two goldfish are safe
in the house where Garfield lives?
Sure. Garfield won't bother them.
Come on. Let me show you
what I'm working on in my studio.
She only has two goldfish?
Pretty cute goldfish.
Well, it's time for breakfast.
Time to make a sandwich.
Tartar sauce sandwich.
Delicious. Come on.
You didn't really think I was gonna eat
Liz's goldfish, did you?
That's too rotten even for me.
In fact, I'm giving up eating fish
altogether.
After that dream,
I'll never eat another fish again.
Until next week.
[Jon and Garfield screaming]
[howling]
Hey, I need a break from this, folks.
Do me a favor.
Grab your remote control
and pause this for a second.
Whew!
Thanks. You're probably wondering
how we got into this mess, right?
Well, it all started earlier today
with a picnic by the lake.
It was a pretty good picnic.
Jon, Liz, the dog and me.
And the food was pretty good, too.
I think I put it best when I said
[burp]
I'm full. I'm full.
I'm so full I couldn't eat another bite
if my life depended on it.
And for dessert, I brought along
a strawberry cheesecake.
Okay, maybe one more bite.
Garfield
Or two. Or 78.
Garfield, this cheesecake
is for all of us, and it's for later.
-Humph!
-[Odie barks]
Liz and I are going for a walk.
Do not eat the cheesecake
while we're gone.
And this is where Jon made
his customary cheap threat. [laughs]
If you do, you can walk the 20 miles home.
Hey, that wasn't a bad one. [laughs]
Come on, Jon. I need to stretch my legs.
What do you think the chances are
that cheesecake will be there
when we get back?
Oh, it'll be there.
It'll probably be inside Garfield,
but it'll be there.
[Garfield] I was glad they went
for a walk.
Now there was nothing
that could interrupt my nap.
[sighs]
[Odie yipping]
Yaaaaaa!
Well, almost nothing.
[Odie whimpers]
I do not wanna play a game.
[whining]
Alright, I'll play a game.
How about if we play "Go Get It"?
Yeah! Yeah! Huh?
-You don't know how to play "Go Get It"?
-Huh-uh.
Okay, then I'll teach you.
Go get it!
[barking]
It's my favorite game, "Go Get It."
If they put it on television,
they'd make a fortune.
[snoring]
Hey, that cheesecake looks mighty good.
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
Ooh!
No. I need to sleep
and I don't want to walk home.
I'll just skip a meal
and have more rest
[snoring]
Then again, it's only 20 miles.
[Garfield] Anyway, while I was
contemplating that dilemma,
Odie was in search of his bone.
Now, I wasn't there for this part,
but I found out later
he looked everywhere for it,
in bushes, behind rocks
There was no sign of it.
He was just about ready to give up
when he spotted it.
[Odie barking]
Huh?
It was a little wolf,
just a couple weeks old.
Odie thought the wolf was very cute,
but he wasn't about
to let it have his bone.
-[crash!]
-[wolf cub mumbling]
[Odie humming]
Well, he wasn't until he realized
how hungry the little wolf was.
[Odie] Awww!
-[cub] Yeah!
-Mm-hmm.
Odie discovered the joys
of sharing your food with someone else.
I have to try that sometime,
maybe not this millennium.
After a while, Odie realized
that there wasn't much nourishment
in that old bone.
The little wolf still looked hungry.
Where to get food, he wondered.
Where to get food.
But of course, there was only one answer.
Odie brought the little wolf back
to the picnic area
where I was in my usual habitat:
dreamland.
[snoring]
Odie usually doesn't do sneaky things,
but I guess hanging around with me
for all these years
has had its effect on him.
[sniffing]
Meanwhile, Jon and Liz
were finishing their hike.
Don't you want to get back while there's
a chance of a small piece of cheesecake?
You know, sometimes I don't have
enough faith in Garfield.
He's basically a good cat. You watch.
I'll bet the cheesecake is untouched.
Jon was wrong. It had been touched,
alright, but just not by me.
[Liz] Good, because I can't wait
to have some of that cheesecake.
Odie probably wasn't worried
about what they'd do to him.
He was worried about the little wolf.
Shh! [humming]
Just give me a small piece
of cheesecake, Liz; I don't wanna
[Jon] Huh?!
It will be small.
About the size of a crumb.
-Garfield!
-Yikes!
How could you?
How could you eat that entire cheesecake
while we were away?
I didn't eat the cheesecake. Honest!
On my honor as an overweight pussycat,
I did not eat one bite of that cheesecake.
Did I eat that cheesecake?
No! Amazingly, I did not.
You're lying, Garfield.
If you didn't, who did?
Odie would never do anything that sneaky.
Jon, you're not gonna make him walk home.
No, but I should.
I'll figure out a suitable punishment
when we get home.
[sighs]
Hey, this feels like we didn't eat
all the food. How'd that happen?
[Garfield] We got the car packed up
and headed back to town.
It was probably about then
that the little wolf's mother arrived.
She must have picked up the scent.
She was pretty determined
to get her baby back,
no matter how far she had to follow.
-All the way home, I was angry.
-[stomach grumbling]
I'm innocent, I tell you.
I never touched that cheesecake.
[Liz] Hmph!
The one time I didn't take the food
and I'm being punished for it.
[Odie laughs]
Jon dropped Liz off at her place
and then we headed for home.
I'll be over after I finish some chores.
And someone else was heading
for our home, too.
[mother wolf snarls]
Of course, Jon was still mad at me.
How could you?
-[Garfield] I didn't.
-[Odie] Hmm?
Huh?
[Jon groans]
Odie was worried that he'd get in trouble
for giving the cheesecake to the wolf,
or maybe that somebody would put
his new friend in a zoo.
[Jon] How could you?
When nobody was looking,
he snuck the little wolf out.
[cub yipping]
Odie told the little wolf to stay
in the garage and he'd bring him food.
He was probably gonna borrow another
cheesecake and they'd blame it on me.
-[slurping]
-[Odie grumbles]
[Odie barks]
Hmm?
[sighs]
-Oh!
-[Odie laughs]
[sighs]
[Garfield] I guess it was about then
that our visitor arrived,
about the time I thought Jon had
forgiven me for the cheesecake incident.
Dinner, Garfield!
Well, it's about time.
Maybe Jon finally realized I'm innocent.
Of this, anyway.
I'm having a porterhouse steak,
baked potato with everything,
glazed carrots, sautéed mushrooms
and a dinner roll.
You get Kitty Krunch
dry imitation cat food.
It's not fair. I'm being punished
for eating an entire cheesecake,
and I didn't even get to eat
the entire cheesecake.
That's all you're getting
for the rest of the month.
Oh, I'll bet Odie would enjoy
that yummy piece of steak.
Odie, here boy!
He's just doing this to torment me.
It's working. I'm tormented.
Come on, Odie! Come enjoy the steak.
Huh? [snarls]
I didn't.
[wolf chomping]
[screams]
[wolf snarls]
-It's a w-w-w
-The word you're looking for is "wolf."
[snarling]
-What do we do, Garfield?
-I think it's obvious what we do.
-[Garfield] We run!
-[Jon] Whoaaa!
[screaming]
So that's how we wound up being chased
around Jon's house by a savage wolf.
Do you understand now?
No, no, no! Don't unpause the video!
-Too late!
-[Jon screaming]
[wolf snarling]
Mama?
It looks like this is it for us, Garfield.
Do you have any final regrets?
Yes. I regret that I didn't eat
the cheesecake.
[cub] Mama!
Huh?
[snarls]
[both laugh]
I've arranged for the pet control people
to take them back to the woods.
Thanks, Liz.
Oh, by the way,
I examined the little wolf cub.
He had strawberry cheesecake in the fur
around his mouth.
You mean, he not Garfield?
Just because I can't talk
doesn't mean you can't listen to me.
Come on, Garfield. I think I owe you
a good meal to say I'm sorry.
I think about a ten lasagna apology
is in order, or make that 11.
[engine starts]
[cub] Bye-bye!
[Odie] Bye!
[cub and Odie howl]