Angel s01e17 Episode Script

We're doomed.
- We can make a break for it.
- Impossible.
- Front exit? - We'd be spotted instantly.
Back door? - Blocked.
- That's it, then.
- We're trapped.
- We might try shouting "fire!" It's not a crowded theater.
One day I might, yes many years from now, when I've lost my looks a little.
Do not laugh.
Only another hour.
I mean, of course, a time will come when Torvald is not.
He's not.
- Line! - "Is not as devoted to me.
" Perhaps two.
- What? - "Is not as devoted.
" Right, right, right.
When Torvald is not as devoted to me.
And I thought I knew eternity.
So, what did you guys think? Well, your projection was excellent.
I could hear every word, and we were way in the back.
Okay, so I was loud, but was I any good? You took the role and made it your own.
Really? Thanks.
Angel, was I good? - I wouldn't say if I didn't think so.
- Thanks.
- You didn't say.
- I didn't? - I don't believe it! - It was a night I'll never forget.
That's Oliver Simon! Who? One of the most important talent managers in town.
I met him at a party.
You were there.
Oh, right.
- He gave me his card.
- What? I worked him all night and he gave you his card? He thought I had a "quality.
" Look who he's with! Can we please go now? - Rebecca Lowell! - Who? Raven! She played Raven in On Your Own, Hit television show, on for, like, 9½ years.
- Do either of you even own a TV? - I don't.
It was a seminal show, canceled by the idiot network.
I was gonna picket, but I didn't have comfortable shoes.
Angel! Oh, my God, Rebecca! Are you all right, darling? Oh, my God! What was she like? Excuse me.
Are you all right? Oh, he's fine.
It was such an honor to save your life, Miss Lowell.
Thank you.
I'm sorry, I didn't get your name.
Cordelia Chase.
I'm so glad you weren't-- Oh, he doesn't even know who you are.
You don't know me? Sure, he doesn't.
I'm sure he'll accept a small reward anyway.
- No, thanks.
- We're not gonna be held up here.
Oliver, down.
He doesn't know who I am.
He's culturally retarded that way.
I'm Rebecca.
Angel.
So, you make a habit of this sort of thing? It's only like his purpose in life.
Angel's the Dark Revenger.
Only not too dark.
Happy dark.
- I got a card in here somewhere.
- Cordelia.
Oh, God.
Who called E.
T.
? - Emma Thompson? - Entertainment Tonight, doofus.
- They're here for the party.
- Oliver.
It's gonna be all over the tabs come morning, Beck.
We might as well just put our own spin on it first.
- Look, I'd like to apologize.
- Oh, he does that.
Here's our card.
If you need rescuing or just want to pal around, call us.
- Let go.
- Come on.
I made the papers.
Last night's all over the front page of the Calendar! Really? There was a reviewer at your play? What? No! Like a reviewer needs to see some 100-year-old play.
The thing with Rebecca Lowell.
I'm in the picture.
- Where? - Right there.
- Where? - Right there, next to Rebecca.
That's my elbow.
Can we forget about Rebecca Lowell? I mean, we ran into an actor.
It's Hollywood, it happens.
We have a nice photo of Cordelia's elbow and an article about me saving a TV star.
- Just because the paper-- - There's no mention of you.
- What? - Nothing.
Well, that's good, right? I mean, this high-profile thing isn't our deal anyway.
What? Rebecca hasn't had a series since On Your Own was canceled.
That was almost a season and a half ago.
And they say Los Angeles has no seasons.
We have to use this now, before she's just another E! True Hollywood Story, When word gets out that you're protector to the stars they'll line up at the door.
Glad I beat the crowd, then.
Oh, my God.
No! I didn't mean-- Coffee, tea? We don't have anything good here.
But our intern would be happy to get you something, Miss Lowell.
Can we talk? Sure, right in here.
Stay.
Stay.
- You're not fond of sunshine.
- I'm a night person.
Me too.
It makes it easier to hide.
You're in the wrong business if you want to hide.
So you never really saw even one single episode of On Your Own? No.
Well, stop by.
I'll give you a private screening of the episode I didn't win the Emmy for.
Thanks for the invitation, but.
Look, I've been famous since I was 14.
It's refreshing to meet someone who doesn't care.
Seems you're surrounded by people who care about you.
They work for me.
They're paid to care.
So how can I help you? I have a stack of these at home.
All the same, written in blood.
He also has my personal telephone number.
Scary calls in the middle of the night.
Most of my devoted fans are harmless, but these-- - It's not blood.
- Are you sure? - Have you tried the police? - Oliver wants me to, but then I'd be just hand-feeding the story to the Enquirer, No, thanks.
How do you know I won't do the same? I don't, but I know you came out of nowhere and saved my life last night.
I know you didn't ask for anything in return.
And I know I feel safer in this office than I do in my own home.
I'm up for a new series.
One of those make-or-break gigs for Rebecca's career, part two.
I need peace of mind.
The car that ran you down was a green, freshly-painted '76 Chevy Nova.
I caught the plates, ran the I.
D.
It was stolen.
And I'm sorry, but I can't take your case.
Are you insane? - I don't understand.
- Give that information to your people.
They'll find the guy.
You don't need me.
My first big connection in Hollywood, and you throw her out of the office.
Ever hear of networking? - Cordelia-- - No! He can fight off donkey demons who rip people's guts out but he can't help a defenseless actress from a psycho? What is your thing? He likes her.
He's afraid of getting close.
Because of his curse? You'd have to get awfully close for that to kick in.
Meanwhile, you could help me.
The person who needs help is Miss Lowell.
Right, he could be helping us both.
Think of the karma.
This may not be the right case for you.
Maybe we can find somebody else to help her.
Oh, no.
Not now! What's this I see in my vision? It's a figure, a woman.
It's Rebecca! She's in danger.
Terrible danger! Great, just great.
Because Mr.
Distant has intimacy issues, I lose my brush with fame.
- Jeez, Cordelia, she's just a person.
- Spoken like a true non-person.
Just knowing a star makes your life better.
I'd do anything to live in her world! They make an incision behind the jaw, under the eyes and suction out fat.
Be proactive with deterioration.
- Right.
- Christiana had it done at 24.
Are you? Miss Lowell, are you okay? I'm calling the police.
Yes, Oliver, I am sure.
I'd rather be alone tonight.
After all this? Don't you at least want someone in the house? Half the LAPD is camped out on my front lawn.
He won't be back tonight.
All right, I should probably go deal with the press.
You do that, Oliver.
I love you, kiddo.
- You know that.
- I know.
I know you're still here.
I'm not what you think.
You're not? Because no reflection, dark private office knowing those letters weren't written in blood.
I guess what I would think is "vampire.
" - Then again-- - Which is impossible.
Bela Lugosi, Gary Oldman, they're vampires.
I believed Frank Langella's performance-- This is real.
You're real.
Do you drink blood? Yeah, but not people.
- You're not a killer.
- I gave that up.
Well, there's a support group for everything in this town, I guess.
- It's a long story.
- How long? - A hundred years? - Two hundred and some change.
Two hundred years? But you look.
If I touch you, will you be cold? I've felt colder.
You're really not afraid.
No.
- Most people who saw what you saw-- - I'm not "most people.
" I lied to Oliver.
I don't really want to be alone tonight.
- He took the case? - Yes, he phoned early this morning.
We follow up on the stolen car.
- What made him change his mind? - Apparently, he didn't.
He was keeping tabs on her all along.
- And he called you early this morning? - Yes.
- Weren't you lobbying for this? - How early? Did he spend the night? - One assumes.
- Great.
He spent the night with the fantasy of millions, all alone.
- "Protecting" her.
- You're worried about the curse.
- I wouldn't.
- Hey! You weren't around the last time Angel went mental.
I was on the first wave of the cleanup crew.
He knows perfect happiness, he goes evil.
Don't tell me not to worry.
Angel's moment of happiness occurred when he was with Buffy.
Do you realize how rare that is? True happiness? - He won't find it with an actress.
- What's that supposed to mean? I was.
- I meant TV actress.
- Save it.
Angel spent the night at Rebecca's.
I owe it to that poor girl to see if he wound up chowing down on my one link to fame.
Cordelia, you're here.
And you brought a cross.
Along with three double half-caf nonfat skinny lattés.
- And a cross.
- Well judging by the outfit, it's safe to come in.
Evil Angel never would've worn those pants.
- Where's Rebecca? - She had a lunch to go to.
Lunch? It's still noon.
Shouldn't that be more of a brunch for her? She was up before dawn, working out.
So she went to lunch and just left you here to rummage through her things? No.
I told her I'm a vampire.
Daytime patio dining is out.
Did you just make a joke? I really told her.
Wow.
So do you think she'd still set me up with her manager? - You look terrific.
- They canceled, didn't they? Just postponed.
Scheduling conflicts.
It's nothing.
- Oliver, you said I had this part.
- Yes.
They want you to come into their offices and read.
Read? Know how long it's been since I've read for anything? A season and a half off the air and suddenly I'm nobody again.
- Not according to these.
- According to those I slept with Ernest Borgnine and I'm bulimic.
I hear Borgnine's a very skilled lover.
Listen to me.
Poor little rich girl.
- We've all got problems.
- Yeah, well right now my problem is getting this guy off my back long enough to win this part.
I've been so distracted lately, I haven't had time to play the game.
Now I'm afraid I'm losing.
- Here you are, Miss Lowell.
- Thank you, Maria.
You're what, a 44 long? - Why? - I have a premiere tonight.
Can't go without my bodyguard, can I? Raven! Raven! Raven! Raven, over here! Raven.
They think that I'm the character I play.
The movie's in the alleyway? No, I just come to these things for the photo-op.
My driver meets me out back.
If I had to sit through every one of these, boredom would kill me.
Rebecca, get down! Rebecca.
It's okay.
I'm here.
--any notes I got if you want to compare them.
I just want to go over your statement one more time, sir.
Rebecca.
Not again.
Are you all right? I came as soon as I heard.
- And when was that, exactly? - What do you mean? I know the stalker.
I've seen him.
At your house.
He's a stuntman.
You used to represent him.
Oh, I didn't get a good look.
Oh, come on, Oliver.
My private phone number, how to get into my house that I skipped the movie at a premiere.
Only you know all that.
I never would have let you get hurt.
You must believe that.
The publicity might help you get the series.
I did it out of love.
I don't pay you to love me.
No.
That you get for free.
I didn't get the part, did I? I was gonna tell you tonight.
The network feels that you're too "mature" for the role.
It may not seem that way now, but once we distance you from Raven-- Oliver, the series is in syndication.
She'll always be there.
- Beck-- - Looking younger than me forever.
Sweetie, your life is not over at 24.
I'm not 24! I'm-- Raven is 22.
She will always be 22.
All right, so she'll always be 22.
She's not you.
And we're gonna have to face it that nobody stays young forever.
I got the preliminary forensics report from the theater.
- The bullets were-- - Blanks.
No, they were blanks.
The shots never connected.
There were no holes in the wall, nothing.
- When does a killer use blanks? - When he's not a killer.
It's fake.
Miss Lowell? I don't think she knows.
How do I tell her? This is good news, isn't it? Depends on what would bother her more: being stalked or not being stalked.
- Actresses.
- Tell me about it.
Thanks for coming.
I'm glad you could find the time.
You were being serious? Big important stars ask me to lunch and a shopping spree all the time in my dreams! I'm just an actress, like you.
You're an actress, I'm someone who auditions and auditions.
That's how it is when you first start out.
I'm sure you'll make it big.
Sorry, I didn't mean to squeal like that in public.
Thank you for calling.
You must have a ton of friends you could've asked.
None of them would know what to buy a 200-year-old vampire as a thank-you gift.
He is impossible to buy for.
What on earth does he need? So, what's his story, anyway? How did he become what he is? - Oh, God.
You got eight hours? - I've got all day.
I won't do that again.
I was just coming to see you.
There was no one upstairs so I just came down.
I hope that's okay.
Sure, come on in.
I went shopping to pick out a thank-you gift but what do you get the guy who's seen everything? So I figured, what's better than Dom? - You can-- You do-- - I can drink other liquids, yeah.
Good.
Have you got glasses? Yeah.
Yeah.
Please sit down.
Wow! It's sort of what you'd expect and sort of not.
Well, there's no coffin.
That hadn't even crossed my mind.
Rebecca.
There's something I have to tell you.
Your stalker-- Oh, that.
I already know.
You do? It turns out we share representation.
- Oliver.
- Set the whole thing up to revive my flagging career.
It didn't work.
I didn't get the part.
I'm sorry.
Yeah.
Have you ever.
Oh, this is so dumb! Have you ever done that thing where you link arms and sip champagne? It's sort of a good-luck thing.
- Your shirt! I'm sorry.
- That's okay.
It's kind of fun.
Cold but fun.
I'll be right back.
You know, the next time I try something so corny I promise not to ruin your wardrobe in the process.
Let's try this again.
A toast: To the end of an ending and the beginning of a beginning.
Oh, Wesley! I got your pages.
What's happening? I may have done something terrible.
- I went shopping with Rebecca.
- That's terrible? No! That was fantastic.
They close off stores for her.
Oh, and lunch at Mirabelle.
I had a to-die-for veal fillet with a light truffle marinade-- - Cordelia.
- Oh, sorry.
The whole time Rebecca's real gabby, asking questions about Angel.
Well, what sorts of questions? Where does Angel hail from, what's his favorite color the specific details on how one could make herself into a vampire.
- Surely you don't think-- - What? That she'd try to maneuver Angel into an exchange of bodily fluids to keep herself young, thus saving her career? I used to be.
A long time ago.
I hurt a lot of people.
- I don't believe that.
- No.
It's true.
I was bad.
Which is why I have to help people now.
I'm trying to atone.
Cordelia says you've saved the world.
A couple times I helped.
But I almost had it sucked into hell once too.
Still, don't you think after all this time, you deserve some happiness? That's probably not a good idea.
You smellso good.
So warm.
I miss that.
You don't have to.
You can have what you've been craving all these long, empty years.
We both can.
Forever.
What are you saying? You know what I'm saying.
Do it.
We won't have to be lonely, either of us, ever again.
You don't know what you're asking me.
Of course I know.
I'm not a fool.
There's a price.
I understand that.
You couldn't possibly understand.
I wasn't afraid when I looked into the mirror and you weren't there.
I didn't scream.
I didn't run.
I understood.
No, you weren't afraid.
You looked into that mirror and saw yourself.
That's all you ever see.
That's what scares you.
This isn't about the way the studio or your fans see you.
It's about how you see yourself.
Your reflection has been corrupted into something unrecognizable.
You want it to stay the same? What you really want is to make it disappear.
You're supposed to help people.
Help me.
You want me to help you? Fine.
- What are you doing? - It's a big decision, eternity.
You need a taste of what you're asking for.
I'm sorry.
What did you do to me? Nothing.
You put something in my drink.
I wanted you to relax a little.
Lower the defenses a little.
- What was it? - Just a little happy pill.
Oh, God.
- I'm so sorry.
- Everybody's so sorry.
- I just wanted us both to be happy.
- But I am happy.
- You are? - Yes.
Perfectly happy.
Angel? You look a little nervous.
You.
- You're-- - Free! You freed me.
God, I love this stuff.
Wow! Let me get the name of your dealer before I kill you.
- Kill me? - In all my years I never killed a famous person.
With no witnesses, who'll believe me? Maybe we can take a picture.
I know! We'll do it like we did back in the day.
I'll keep your head on a stick as proof.
My head on a stick? Well, okay pike.
- You're trying to scare me.
- Is it working? No.
How about now? - You're crazy.
- No.
I'm a vampire.
You could drop a few pounds.
I'll help you.
This isn't you.
They always mistake me for the character, never see the real me.
I just wanted to-- Be like me? Hey, I'm one happy fella.
I'll torture you for a few long hours then you can tell me if this is the lifestyle for you.
Up to you.
Whatever you're going to do do it.
I'm not running anymore.
Now, that I respect! Women! It's okay.
Thank God! Help me.
He's trying to kill me.
You slut! - You did it with him, didn't you? - Cordelia.
- What are you talking about? - What you did.
- I didn't do anything.
- You must have done something.
Maybe I gave him something to loosen him up.
Now he's-- - Loose? - Yeah.
- What was it? - Does it matter? If he's homicidal, I think, yeah! - Doximall.
- Doximall! - Doxi-what? - Powerful tranquilizer.
Induces bliss.
Bliss? As in bliss? Sheer contentment? Perfect happiness? - It's synthetic.
Not true happiness.
- This is good.
He hasn't really turned.
It's an illusion.
He bit me.
We'll leave the premises until the effects wear off.
- Are you sure they will wear off? - Reasonably.
He's cut the power.
- Where's the box? - Side of the building.
- He's gone out.
- Which means he's-- Looks like somebody didn't pay the power bill.
Cordelia? I'd lay odds that the phone's dead too.
What do you think? - What happens if there's an emergency? - Angel.
I want you to listen to me.
What you're experiencing isn't real.
You've been fed a drug.
It's simulating bliss.
All that you're feeling is chemical suggestion.
Angel? Name's Angelus.
I don't wish to take drastic measures, but unless you listen, I warn you-- You're warning me? What happened, Wes? You suddenly grow a pair? That's it.
The whole root of your inferiority complex.
Good news, Wes, old boy.
You don't really have an inferiority complex.
You're just simply inferior.
Wesley, no! - Why don't you just-- - Just-- Just-- Line?! "Of course a time will come when Torvald is not as devoted to me.
" You were really, let me tell you, bad.
- Stop it.
- Why? You didn't.
I've been to hell, but that was so much worse! You had to be there.
There wasn't a dry eye in the house.
Everybody was laughing.
Here's a thought: Maybe you can get Raven to coach you.
Then you'd actually suck.
- Back off.
- What are you gonna do? - Melt me? - One more step and you'll find out.
You think this is just water? - You're bluffing.
- Am I? You don't think I was ready for this, do you? Why do I have a stake stashed in my desk, a cross in my bag? I think about this happening every single day.
That's just drinking water.
Delivered right to our door then blessed every second Tuesday by Father Mackie while you're down in your cave sleeping through the day.
You don't believe me? Have some! And the Oscar goes to.
Are you still evil? - I'm so sorry.
- Can you read that line again? - Rebecca? Is she--? - Gone.
She won't be keeping you on retainer as her bodyguard.
I think it was the trying to murder her that lost the gig.
- I need to apologize.
- There's no need.
- Hello? - It was the drug.
Couldn't be helped.
Things were said, that's true but I think it best if we put it behind us.
Move on.
Thank you.
You walk a fine line, Angel.
I don't envy you.
Wesley? Nice moves up there.
- Cordelia-- - Okay.
Here's something I never thought I would say to you: Wesley's right.
- Forget it.
- I didn't mean-- Yes, you did.
I'd appreciate you not trying to weasel out of it.
Angelus may not be relaxing company, but at least he's honest.
Shouldn't I expect the same from the not-evil version? So we're okay, then? I'm too big of a person to let it get in the way of our friendship.
I appreciate that.
You're not gonna untie me, are you? Wesley? Cordelia? Guys?