Justice League (2001) s01e18 Episode Script
Injustice For All (1)
Luthor: So, this is how it ends.
You know, I've carried this around for years Waiting for just the right moment, But now that it's here, I almost feel a little let down.
Almost.
Unh! Unh! Any last requests? Luthor, I have to know, Those weapons you sold to the terrorists, how-- How did I get them through customs? A gift here, a bribe there.
When money talks, people listen, Like Stavros, of the shipping company.
Or Schneider, the Interpol agent Who looked the other way.
Sounds like you're going to have company in prison.
[gasps.]
It can't be! The kryptonite! Won't protect you any longer.
No! Batman: You're usually more careful, Lex.
You slipped up.
And you're going down hard.
[gasps.]
ugh! Mission accomplished.
J'onn: So much for your image as the benevolent businessman.
This is the end of an era.
The end of your era, maybe.
Ugh! Oh! Why do they always run? [groans.]
Unh! Aah! Ohh! Oh! Unh! Uh! Phew! [engine straining.]
[gasping.]
Unh! Lex? [groans.]
Lex! [groans.]
You! Lex, this is dr.
Patel.
He's got something to tell you.
No.
I've got something to tell you.
Whatever I said to the Martian won't stand up in court.
I'll get the best lawyers, the best witnesses, the best-- Lex! None of that matters anymore.
Listen.
Mr.
Luthor, you had a seizure.
Has this happened to you before? My tests indicate you have a rare form of blood poisoning.
Impossible! Remember that chunk of kryptonite You carried around for years? What about it? Kryptonite only affects you.
Actually, we're finding that it can affect humans, too, But only if they're exposed over a long period.
This is your fault! All of it! What's the treatment? Radiation? Chemo? Unfortunately, there is no cure.
Then find one! Price is no object.
I'm sorry.
There's nothing I can do.
It's terminal.
Happy, Superman? Lex, if there's anything I can do You've done more than enough.
[waves crashing.]
[opera playing.]
[groans.]
Aah! Uh! Aah! Hey, keep it down! Can't a body die in peace around here? Exquisite.
Humanite! How can you stand that caterwauling? Music is one of the meager pleasures I'm allowed in here, Along with a few other necessities.
You should try the culture channel.
It might improve your disposition.
There's nothing wrong with my disposition That a little freedom wouldn't cure.
That's not what I hear.
I need your help, And I can make it worth your while.
What do I need with money? Everyone needs money.
The only question is-- how much? [beeping.]
Dinner, Humanite.
I'm afraid I'm a little under the weather.
Could you please wheel it in here? What do you think? Well, he is a model prisoner, but why take chances? Aah! Aah! Ugh! Unh! Ohh Salisbury steak? Really! Luthor! Impressive, but let's not linger.
[siren.]
There they are! Open fire! Hang on! Radio: All units, 2 prison inmates have escaped.
The Ultra-Humanite and Lex Luthor.
They are considered armed and extremely dangerous.
[dog barking.]
[siren blaring.]
[indistinct talking on radio.]
What we need is a small diversion.
[beeping.]
Aah! Ow! Call the rescue unit! That should keep them busy.
Come on! [coughing.]
Daddy, help! [coughing and screaming.]
I need backup here, fast! [coughing.]
I'm scared! Don't be.
It's going to be all right.
[screams.]
[gasps.]
Unh! Ahh! [screams.]
Batman: Unh! Trina! Daddy! I'm used to being thanked when I save someone.
I'm not used to being saved.
Where are Luthor and the Humanite? We couldn't pick up the trail.
No biggie.
It's just 2 guys.
How much trouble can they give us? [sniffing.]
[snarls.]
[snarls.]
Easy, lady, easy.
Who are you? The name's Copperhead.
I'm here about a job.
So am I.
Somebody called me.
Was it you? No, but maybe we'll be working together, Closely together.
[snarls.]
aah! Witch! Oof! Unh! [gasps.]
Ha! Nice kitty.
Hands off! Aah! No one hurts Grundy! Unh! [growling.]
Oof! Grr! Arr! [growls.]
[groaning.]
[groaning.]
Hey, who turned out the lights? The Shade: I did.
And I'll do worse if you don't stop behaving like unruly children.
Who do you think you are? The Shade.
And my nightstick is more than powerful enough To handle you amateurs.
Hey! Spare us.
Without this you're less than nothing, Little man.
[snarls.]
[chuckles.]
Common criminals.
Is this what I've been reduced to? Luthor: Criminals, yes, but common, Most certainly not.
Lex Luthor? Well, the plot thins.
Cheetah, Sapphire, Grundy, glad you could make it.
And, of course, you all know the Ultra-Humanite.
Charmed, I'm sure.
Copperhead: Cut the courtesies, Luthor.
What do you want? Each of you is the best in the world At what you do, and I have need Of your unique services.
My talents don't come cheaply.
You'll all be paid most handsomely If you can do one simple job.
What kind of job? Destroy Superman and the Justice League.
Ha.
And I had those flames out before the firemen Even stepped off their trucks.
That's fast.
Fastest man alive.
Which might explain why you can't get a date.
Yeah.
Hey! What's that supposed to mean? Quiet.
Man: A dangerous hostage situation Developing at the federal building.
So far, the Ultra-Humanite has refused To speak with negotiators.
A freak of science, the Humanite is reportedly a genius Who is also extremely dangerous-- No biggie, right? Humanite! Let a hostage go, And I'll give you one of my men in return.
What do you take me for, A troglodyte? No deal! What? Drop the weapon, Magilla! Oof! Look for other hostages! Right! Unh! You're safe now.
But you're not! [growls.]
unh! Unh! [growls.]
Oof! Ugh! [crashing.]
[grunts.]
[growls.]
oof! Unh! Surprised? [cheetah growling.]
[hissing.]
unh! [snarling.]
[hissing.]
[footsteps.]
[grunting.]
Unh! Oof! Ugh! [growling.]
Superman: Oof! Unh! I'm going to enjoy this.
Oof! Unh! [gasps.]
[grunting.]
Unh! Ugh! Oof! Ugh! [growls.]
[hissing.]
Down, boy! [growling.]
Let me go! [grunting.]
Relax, lady.
This will all be over before you know it.
That's what you think.
Hey! Oof! Ugh! Unh! Oof! Oof! Unh! Ugh! Oof! [gasps.]
Unh! [gasps.]
Ugh! Ugh! Unh! Oof! [grunting.]
Finish him off! [panting.]
Ugh.
Ahh! Oof! Unh! Ugh! Ugh! Oof! Unh! Luthor: Ahh! There goes our paycheck.
Oof! Ohh I'd hate to see anything happen to you, Lex.
I'm sure.
[hissing.]
aah! Ahh! Oof! Unh! You ok? Don't worry about me.
Stop them! Unh.
Luthor, they're too well organized! Ugh! Let me get us out of here.
It's either that or prison again.
All right, just do it! [grunting.]
[indistinct shouting.]
They're gone.
Look, we've still got one of them.
But they got one of us.
[groans.]
The venom antidote, it's working.
Welcome back.
We were afraid we'd lost you.
Luthor and the others, What happened? They got away, all but Copperhead.
I'm headed down to Striker's to interrogate him.
All right.
Let's go.
No.
You're staying here.
That venom almost killed you.
So? So, you're staying here.
You really should be resting.
I know this must be hard for you, Feeling vulnerable.
You're the only one of us without special powers, But you don't need to prove yourself.
You're a valued member of this team, And we're only trying to-- I'm taking the shuttle, Unless you want to try and stop me.
No.
Luthor: The best at what you do.
What was I thinking? We did everything we could.
Did you? Did you fight like your lives depended on it? Did you fight to the last man? You get what you pay for, Luthor.
Are you saying you want more money? You want to be rewarded for failure? I ought to take the whole lot of you and-- unh! And what? Go ahead, do it.
You'll be saving me From months of bedpans and feeding tubes, And you'll also guarantee That none of you will ever see a penny from me.
You're crazy.
[door opens.]
And what's wrong with that? It's done wonders for me.
Get out of here.
Oh, Lexie, I'm hurt! How could you have this little party Without inviting me? It's not a party.
Grundy, get rid of him.
Grr.
[horn honks.]
[coughing.]
Oof! But seriously, Lex, you need me.
Like I need skin rash.
Maybe so, But I know something you don't know.
I know how the bat thinks.
How long we wait here? Patience, Grundy, patience.
Grundy not like waiting.
Unh! Oof! [groans.]
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha! [cackling.]
You know, I've carried this around for years Waiting for just the right moment, But now that it's here, I almost feel a little let down.
Almost.
Unh! Unh! Any last requests? Luthor, I have to know, Those weapons you sold to the terrorists, how-- How did I get them through customs? A gift here, a bribe there.
When money talks, people listen, Like Stavros, of the shipping company.
Or Schneider, the Interpol agent Who looked the other way.
Sounds like you're going to have company in prison.
[gasps.]
It can't be! The kryptonite! Won't protect you any longer.
No! Batman: You're usually more careful, Lex.
You slipped up.
And you're going down hard.
[gasps.]
ugh! Mission accomplished.
J'onn: So much for your image as the benevolent businessman.
This is the end of an era.
The end of your era, maybe.
Ugh! Oh! Why do they always run? [groans.]
Unh! Aah! Ohh! Oh! Unh! Uh! Phew! [engine straining.]
[gasping.]
Unh! Lex? [groans.]
Lex! [groans.]
You! Lex, this is dr.
Patel.
He's got something to tell you.
No.
I've got something to tell you.
Whatever I said to the Martian won't stand up in court.
I'll get the best lawyers, the best witnesses, the best-- Lex! None of that matters anymore.
Listen.
Mr.
Luthor, you had a seizure.
Has this happened to you before? My tests indicate you have a rare form of blood poisoning.
Impossible! Remember that chunk of kryptonite You carried around for years? What about it? Kryptonite only affects you.
Actually, we're finding that it can affect humans, too, But only if they're exposed over a long period.
This is your fault! All of it! What's the treatment? Radiation? Chemo? Unfortunately, there is no cure.
Then find one! Price is no object.
I'm sorry.
There's nothing I can do.
It's terminal.
Happy, Superman? Lex, if there's anything I can do You've done more than enough.
[waves crashing.]
[opera playing.]
[groans.]
Aah! Uh! Aah! Hey, keep it down! Can't a body die in peace around here? Exquisite.
Humanite! How can you stand that caterwauling? Music is one of the meager pleasures I'm allowed in here, Along with a few other necessities.
You should try the culture channel.
It might improve your disposition.
There's nothing wrong with my disposition That a little freedom wouldn't cure.
That's not what I hear.
I need your help, And I can make it worth your while.
What do I need with money? Everyone needs money.
The only question is-- how much? [beeping.]
Dinner, Humanite.
I'm afraid I'm a little under the weather.
Could you please wheel it in here? What do you think? Well, he is a model prisoner, but why take chances? Aah! Aah! Ugh! Unh! Ohh Salisbury steak? Really! Luthor! Impressive, but let's not linger.
[siren.]
There they are! Open fire! Hang on! Radio: All units, 2 prison inmates have escaped.
The Ultra-Humanite and Lex Luthor.
They are considered armed and extremely dangerous.
[dog barking.]
[siren blaring.]
[indistinct talking on radio.]
What we need is a small diversion.
[beeping.]
Aah! Ow! Call the rescue unit! That should keep them busy.
Come on! [coughing.]
Daddy, help! [coughing and screaming.]
I need backup here, fast! [coughing.]
I'm scared! Don't be.
It's going to be all right.
[screams.]
[gasps.]
Unh! Ahh! [screams.]
Batman: Unh! Trina! Daddy! I'm used to being thanked when I save someone.
I'm not used to being saved.
Where are Luthor and the Humanite? We couldn't pick up the trail.
No biggie.
It's just 2 guys.
How much trouble can they give us? [sniffing.]
[snarls.]
[snarls.]
Easy, lady, easy.
Who are you? The name's Copperhead.
I'm here about a job.
So am I.
Somebody called me.
Was it you? No, but maybe we'll be working together, Closely together.
[snarls.]
aah! Witch! Oof! Unh! [gasps.]
Ha! Nice kitty.
Hands off! Aah! No one hurts Grundy! Unh! [growling.]
Oof! Grr! Arr! [growls.]
[groaning.]
[groaning.]
Hey, who turned out the lights? The Shade: I did.
And I'll do worse if you don't stop behaving like unruly children.
Who do you think you are? The Shade.
And my nightstick is more than powerful enough To handle you amateurs.
Hey! Spare us.
Without this you're less than nothing, Little man.
[snarls.]
[chuckles.]
Common criminals.
Is this what I've been reduced to? Luthor: Criminals, yes, but common, Most certainly not.
Lex Luthor? Well, the plot thins.
Cheetah, Sapphire, Grundy, glad you could make it.
And, of course, you all know the Ultra-Humanite.
Charmed, I'm sure.
Copperhead: Cut the courtesies, Luthor.
What do you want? Each of you is the best in the world At what you do, and I have need Of your unique services.
My talents don't come cheaply.
You'll all be paid most handsomely If you can do one simple job.
What kind of job? Destroy Superman and the Justice League.
Ha.
And I had those flames out before the firemen Even stepped off their trucks.
That's fast.
Fastest man alive.
Which might explain why you can't get a date.
Yeah.
Hey! What's that supposed to mean? Quiet.
Man: A dangerous hostage situation Developing at the federal building.
So far, the Ultra-Humanite has refused To speak with negotiators.
A freak of science, the Humanite is reportedly a genius Who is also extremely dangerous-- No biggie, right? Humanite! Let a hostage go, And I'll give you one of my men in return.
What do you take me for, A troglodyte? No deal! What? Drop the weapon, Magilla! Oof! Look for other hostages! Right! Unh! You're safe now.
But you're not! [growls.]
unh! Unh! [growls.]
Oof! Ugh! [crashing.]
[grunts.]
[growls.]
oof! Unh! Surprised? [cheetah growling.]
[hissing.]
unh! [snarling.]
[hissing.]
[footsteps.]
[grunting.]
Unh! Oof! Ugh! [growling.]
Superman: Oof! Unh! I'm going to enjoy this.
Oof! Unh! [gasps.]
[grunting.]
Unh! Ugh! Oof! Ugh! [growls.]
[hissing.]
Down, boy! [growling.]
Let me go! [grunting.]
Relax, lady.
This will all be over before you know it.
That's what you think.
Hey! Oof! Ugh! Unh! Oof! Oof! Unh! Ugh! Oof! [gasps.]
Unh! [gasps.]
Ugh! Ugh! Unh! Oof! [grunting.]
Finish him off! [panting.]
Ugh.
Ahh! Oof! Unh! Ugh! Ugh! Oof! Unh! Luthor: Ahh! There goes our paycheck.
Oof! Ohh I'd hate to see anything happen to you, Lex.
I'm sure.
[hissing.]
aah! Ahh! Oof! Unh! You ok? Don't worry about me.
Stop them! Unh.
Luthor, they're too well organized! Ugh! Let me get us out of here.
It's either that or prison again.
All right, just do it! [grunting.]
[indistinct shouting.]
They're gone.
Look, we've still got one of them.
But they got one of us.
[groans.]
The venom antidote, it's working.
Welcome back.
We were afraid we'd lost you.
Luthor and the others, What happened? They got away, all but Copperhead.
I'm headed down to Striker's to interrogate him.
All right.
Let's go.
No.
You're staying here.
That venom almost killed you.
So? So, you're staying here.
You really should be resting.
I know this must be hard for you, Feeling vulnerable.
You're the only one of us without special powers, But you don't need to prove yourself.
You're a valued member of this team, And we're only trying to-- I'm taking the shuttle, Unless you want to try and stop me.
No.
Luthor: The best at what you do.
What was I thinking? We did everything we could.
Did you? Did you fight like your lives depended on it? Did you fight to the last man? You get what you pay for, Luthor.
Are you saying you want more money? You want to be rewarded for failure? I ought to take the whole lot of you and-- unh! And what? Go ahead, do it.
You'll be saving me From months of bedpans and feeding tubes, And you'll also guarantee That none of you will ever see a penny from me.
You're crazy.
[door opens.]
And what's wrong with that? It's done wonders for me.
Get out of here.
Oh, Lexie, I'm hurt! How could you have this little party Without inviting me? It's not a party.
Grundy, get rid of him.
Grr.
[horn honks.]
[coughing.]
Oof! But seriously, Lex, you need me.
Like I need skin rash.
Maybe so, But I know something you don't know.
I know how the bat thinks.
How long we wait here? Patience, Grundy, patience.
Grundy not like waiting.
Unh! Oof! [groans.]
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha! [cackling.]