Sam and Cat (2013) s01e18 Episode Script

Yep.
Uh-uh.
Right.
Listen Nona, I'm trying to watch something on TV could you oi! Yeah, Nona, sure I'd love to hear what happened after you fell down the stairs.
Oh wow, the doctor says you may need surgery, so interesting.
M'jiggyyyy! Hey, I gotta call ya back.
Dice just blew himself up! Hey, when did you get back from magic camp?! Last night! Oh, I love when you wave your hands magically.
So, are you ready to be amazed and mystified? Yes, yes, now please! All right.
Examine this ordinary box.
Ordinary box.
See anything inside? No! How'd you do that?! I didn't do anything yet.
Oh.
Well, get to it! All right.
First, I sprinkle some magical dust in the box.
Cool.
Next, I put the lid on the box.
Lid on the box.
And now, you take these magical beans.
And when I say; "A-bra, k'day-bra" You throw the magic beans at the door.
I'll do it! A-bra, k'day-bra! Beans! I did it! Look in the box! - Go ahead, look in it.
- Hmm.
It's a rat! The power of magic! Uh-huh.
How did you do that? Easy.
When you threw the magic beans, you turned and looked at the door And then I just switched the boxes.
So you're not magic.
Well, not really.
You're just a liar.
A magical liar! Yay! Yay! I'm never that far.
No matter where you are.
Believe it, we can make it come true.
And I, I, I, I I'll never say, never.
As long as we keep it together.
Oh! It's the life that we choose, and we still break the rules.
But it's all gonna be just fine.
Just fine.
You and me we're gonna be just fine.
Oh.
Oi Hey.
Hey, where you been?! I took William to the movies.
What? We had a babysitting job tonight, remember? William? No, that's next weekend.
And he's not William.
Oh.
Then who are you? I told you, I'm Randy.
Well, what movie did you guys see? "Blood monkeys; Chimply strikes back".
- That's rated R! - So? That movie messed me up, man.
Well, I know what'll make you feel better.
Here, just step out there for a second.
There you go.
Come here come here come here! Hurry.
I'm coming.
What? I wanna do a magic trick on you! - Wanna see a magic trick? - No.
Please examine this ordinary box.
Alright Now, I'm gonna sprinkle some magic dust inside Is the trick over? Shh! I put the lid back on the box Why'd you say "on" so loud? Hush! Now take these magic beans And when I say; "A-bra, k'day-bra" You told me to stop making fun of your a-bra.
Just throw the beans at the door when I say it! Okay, sure.
A-bra, k'day-bra! You're supposed to look at the door when you throw the beans! Why? So you can switch that box out for another box that looks exactly like that box but has a rat in it? - Ding-dang it! - Ha! I wanted to trick you! Mm, sorry, kid.
You have to be really smart to trick old Sam.
Well, I am really smart.
What? Why are you laughing?! Wait wait wait no, say what you said-say it again one more time.
I said I'm really smart.
And then, when she threw the magic beans, she didn't even look at the door.
Ruined my whole trick! Well, ya know, Sam's really smart.
So I'm not surprised she didn't fall for it.
Well, I fell for it.
Uh-huh.
I fell for it three times.
Dice, will you please teach me another trick? One that'll work on Sam? Hey, I know a good trick! Oh yay, tell me! Well, I used to sneak up on my roommate in the middle of the night.
And then, while he was sound asleep I'd slap him right in the face! He moved out.
Oh! - What? - What happened? Twins! This is perfect! Hi! - Hello.
- Hey.
Your sons are twins! I see that.
Well! Don't you have something fun you wanna do today? Ya know, by yourself? Why? Because I'm a professional babysitter! See, here's my card.
Sam and Cat's super rockin' fun-time Babysitting Service! - Oh, well, that's a clever name.
- Right?! Well, why don't you go have yourself some fun, and I'll take care of your boys, and you can pick 'em up later at my place! I would like to get a manicure and maybe go visit my friends Yay! Come on boys! Let's go! Come with me! This way! Here we go! Out the door! Bye! Go go go go! Out of the door! This'll be fun! This way.
Hey, why do they call these girly fries? No, they're called curly fries.
Curly.
Oh, curly.
Somebody call my name?! No.
Ah! Woop-woop-woop-woop-woop! Ay-yiy-yiy-yi! Our ancestors found that hilarious.
Okay! Sam went to Tubba Chicken, but she should be back any minute now! Why did you put my brother in another room? Because that's fun.
What are you, allergic to fun? No, just peanuts.
- Hey yo! - Shut up, she's home! Hey, Sam.
Whatcha doing walking into our apartment? Yeah.
I just got a Tubba Chicken.
Who's the kid? Oh, this is Myron.
The boy we're babysitting today.
- Ah.
- Yup.
Take a look at his face.
Get a nice, long look.
Nice face, Myron.
Now, I'm gonna eat some chicken.
I dunno, Sam.
Haven't you read the news about Tubba Chicken? What news? They say that if you eat that stuff it messes with your brain.
Yeah I'm pretty worried about that.
Well, maybe you should be.
Ya know, they say that if you eat too much chicken from Tubba Chicken You can get confused.
And you can forget things.
Well, I'm not confused and I never forget anything.
Hey, where's my special chicken plate? I think I saw it in our room.
Why would my chicken plate be in our room? Maybe you forgot you put it there.
Whatever.
I'm gonna go get it.
Can I have a chicken puck? - You want one of my chicken pucks? - Uh huh.
- Just one puck? - Yeah.
No.
Look! It's happening! Doh! - What are you doing? - Just sitting on the bed.
But How'd you get in here so fast? Huh? I said how did you You were just in Mm! Hey, how did Myron get into our room so fast without me seeing him? What, you mean the little boy we're babysitting? Yeah, Myron.
Little red-headed guy.
He's not here yet.
What? Yeah, he is.
He was just on that couch a minute ago, remember? He wanted one of my chicken pucks.
Maybe you shouldn't be licking that chicken.
Maybe licking that chicken is making you sickin'.
All right, you don't believe me? Go look in our bedroom and see for yourself.
Kay-Kay.
Nothing wrong with licking my chicken.
It's open.
Hi.
I'm Myron.
Are those chicken pucks? - Yeah.
- Can I have one? No! I already told you that five minutes ago.
No, you didn't.
I just got here.
No, you didn't just We were talking back in the You just stay right there.
Cat! Look, Sam, I found your chicken plate.
I wanna know how the kid we're babysitting showed up at our front door.
- Oh, Myron's here? - Mm! Myron was here when I got home! And then he was in here! And then he was knocking on our front door, acting like he's never seen me before! Sam, please don't eat any more of that chicken.
- Why not? - It's a tubba trouble.
Come with me.
There! Look! See? There he is right there, standing right there.
Yeah.
- Hi Myron.
Nice to meet you.
- You've already met him! No, she hasn't.
All right, somebody better tell momma what's going on here! We're babysitting.
Myron, would you like to meet my stuffed animals? I'd be honored.
Thank you.
Come with me.
What are you doing to me? Who is it?! I'm Myron.
Are you my babysitter? Chicken.
It's the chicken.
The chicken! Ah! Mm.
I got you! I got you so good! Sucka! - Twins?!? - Yup! I tricked Sam.
I tricked Sam.
I tricked Sam.
Because I'm so smart! I tricked Sam.
I tricked Sam.
Who tricked Sam? It was me that's who! _.
Hi, this is Melanie.
Come to Los Angeles.
Sam? You remember what we promised each other, when we were five years old? - I'm in the middle of exams.
- Remember the twin pact?! We swore that if we ever needed to use our twinosity to trick someone, we'd always be there for each other.
- But I just I can't - The twin pact! I'll be there tomorrow.
Get ready, Cat.
Ooh, chicken puck.
What? What!? Oh! You are?! Okay, cool, um, uh, just wait outside.
Don't let anybody see you.
I'll be there in five minutes! Hi! Who's what's happen good morning? Oh Momma's sick.
Do you have a fever? Uh Whoa, yeah, a hundred and twenty.
I feel so Oh no.
No, no no no! - Oh no, what is it? What's wrong? - Look! Look at my arm! Do you see what's on my arm?! All the hair? No! The bite marks! Look at the bite marks! Who bit you? I don't know.
It must have been One of those twin boys we were babysitting yesterday.
- Oh! - Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, remember? I was teaching 'em how to wrestle, and one of 'em must have bit me.
Oh, do you know what this means?! Maybe, but probably not.
When a person gets bitten by a twin Bitten by a twin.
That person gets a Twinfection.
Oh my And then What! What! And then what-what and then!? You get your own evil twin.
Oh my God! Sam, shut your puck hole.
I'm serious! We could be in some real danger here! Mm-hmm.
You are so full of pudding.
You're just trying to trick me because yesterday, I tricked you.
Oh, no.
This is not a trick.
Uh-huh, sure it ain't.
I gotta shower.
Be careful! My evil twin could be in there! Oh, okay.
Yeah-heh-heh-yeah! Melanie.
Hey.
What are you doing in a trash can? You said not to let anyone see me.
Ah, right.
Now why did I have to come here? Because I need to mess with my roommate's head.
Okay.
So I'm supposed to be you.
No.
You're gonna be evil, insane, wild, and dangerous.
So you.
Me times a hundred.
Wait, you mean the Twinfection thing? Uh-huh.
Oh Sam, you know nobody's dumb enough to fall for that.
Ah Lemme tell you a little about my roommate.
Feeling better? No.
I think my Twinfection's getting worse.
Oh Sam, give it up.
Just admit that yesterday I got you so good, and now you're mad because Oh my gosh.
Oh! - Blah! - Oh! Oh, oh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
What is happening? No! Oh! Did you see that? I saw! That was your evil twin! Now do you believe me?!? I don't know.
Oh, oh no, nuh-uh, no, don't do that to her.
I believe! Then she poured juice on me And then she ran back in the door and started swatting me on the head with a tree branch! What kinda juice? Orange.
- What kinda tree? - Goomer! What? I'm not allowed to ask follow-up questions? - Wah! - Ah! Oh, no.
Ah! What? Why does your evil twin always attack me?! Poor Cat.
Are you hurt? No, I think I'm fine.
She just threw french fries in my face and kissed me.
- But not on the lips, right? - Yes, on the lips.
Why? Oh no.
That's the same as a bite.
- If her lips touched your lips - What?! You mean I'm gonna have a Twinfection?! Okay, this is nuts.
Come on Goomer, we're going to a movie.
- Kay-Kay.
- Wait.
What are you doing? No.
Put me down! I don't wanna have an evil twin! There's gonna be an evil Cat! Sam, what do I do?! No, but listen! There are ways to stop a Twinfection.
So I won't get an evil twin?! Right.
But we don't have much time.
So I'll finish this chili as fast as I can.
Oh! Oof! Aw yeah.
Oh gross.
Liquid filth.
I don't I don't understand why I have to do all this.
- Do you want your own evil twin?! - No! Then you have to do what the Internet says! I do? This remedy is your only hope.
Well, if it's my only hope.
It is.
You ready? I suppose.
- Oh! - Oof! Drink the dirty sock water.
Oi! Good! Good, now rub the fish against your face.
Okay.
Ugh! - Oh come on.
All over, both cheeks - Okay.
But, jeez, it's smelly.
- Now blow the ram's horn! - Okay.
- Good! Back to one! Dirty sock water! - Dirty sock water! - Fish to face! - Fish to face.
- Blow the ram horn! - Blow the ram horn.
Good good good, faster! - Dirty sock water! - Sock water.
- Fish to face! - Fish to face.
- Say hi to my twin sister, Melanie.
- Hi Melanie.
- Blow the ram's horn.
- Ram's horn! You have a twin sister?! She made me do this.
You You tricked me! And I'm gonna sing you a little song about it.
I tricked Cat.
I tricked Cat.
I'm so cool because I tricked Cat.
I tricked Cat.
Because I have a twin sister.
Her name is Melanie.
And she's dancing, too.
- What are they doing here? - I don't know.
- Yeah! - Can I dance, too? - Sure! - Yay! Yay.
Woo, woo.
Twin sisters.
Sam tricked me.
Yes, I did.
Yes, I did.
- You're good.
- That's so fun.
Hey, you better get to Dice's.
Right.
I'm just gonna toss this cup.
Yeah, just don't toss it in that trash can it's not.
.
Hey.
Why'd you throw yourself in the trash!? Uh Oh no! Flying monkeys!