The Class s01e18 Episode Script

Hey, I'm here.
Hey.
Wait, wait, wait.
We only got a second.
Rich is unloading the truck.
I didn't sleep at all last night.
I know.
Me neither.
We're still doing this, right? Yeah, we really are.
I can't believe we're actually gonna be together.
I am so freakin' happy.
I know.
Me too.
Just-- I'm dreading having to tell Yonk.
When does he come home? Tonight.
You know what you're gonna say? I've gotta tell him the truth.
That I'm not happy.
That I care about him but I love you.
Wow.
Do you have to mention me? What? You know, like, the "me" part.
Maybe he doesn't need to know that.
You're kind of a key component.
I know, but he's also my friend.
There's no way to downplay it? Maybe I'm not the reason.
I'm just in the mix.
Look, you're gonna have to face the fact that it may not work out between you and him.
I just-- I don't know.
I feel really bad.
I do too.
Yonk and I are supposed to go to the Sixers game next week.
You want me to hold off? No, no.
Besides, they're only playing the Hornets.
What if it was the Lakers? Why do that? Hey.
Hey, Rich, why don't you finish tying up that rug and put it up against the wall? Right, you sure you don't need help with the standing around chatting? Over the line? Okay.
Hey, um He doesn't know anything, right? No.
Can you imagine him with a secret like this? Oh, God.
He'd explode.
There'd be little orange bits of him all over.
I'm gonna start to pack.
I want all my stuff in the car so I can just tell him and leave.
Really? Yeah.
It'll be easier for him if he doesn't have to watch me get all my stuff together.
Oh, God.
Hey, hey, hey.
We're gonna get through this.
What in the hell happened here? You're home early! They cancelled my meeting.
How come? Seems the new Yonk Allen grill still has some flaws.
One in every 50 blows up.
One of the R&D guys lost an ear.
- Oh, my God.
- That's okay.
They made him a new, little, plastic one.
Kinda looks like an apricot.
You just wanna pluck it off and pop it in your mouth.
So what happened? We had a little leak but it's under control.
Oh, all right.
Well, I'm glad you boys are back.
'cause I thought Nick and I could take you out for a little good-bye lunch.
You know, to thank you for all you've done.
That is so not necessary.
I think it's a good idea.
Really? The idea he just said? Yeah, only I can't go because I have stuff to do.
But the three of you should definitely have lunch.
You sure about that? Yeah, I really need to do this stuff! Okay.
So, uh, what stuff you gotta do? Oh, just, you know, lady stuff.
Hoo-hoo! I don't wanna know nothing about that.
Yes, it's disgusting to the man who was tempted to eat another man's ear.
Hey.
Hey.
So you ready to get your ass kicked? You're the one who's gonna get spanked all over the court.
Oh, yeah? By the time I'm done with you, you're gonna be crying to your mama.
Crying to mine or nailing yours? We're getting really good at this trash talk.
Yeah, I know! Oh, by the way, you mind if we stop by Palmer's on the way? She forgot her sweatshirt.
Yeah, sure.
Oh, hey.
So the break-up went okay? Yeah, I'm gonna miss her.
She was sweet.
And gorgeous.
I know! You know what's not fair? The whole time we went out I didn't run into one guy I went to high school with.
But you took a lotta pictures.
Pff.
Bought a new camera for it.
Hey, wanna hear something crazy? Mm-hmm.
Palmer said she thinks I should be with Kat.
Well, duh.
Wait, what? You and Kat.
Duh.
What are you talking about? I'm talking about duh! We're not "duh" at all.
We're just friends.
Do you find her attractive? Well, yeah.
Have you ever pictured her naked? I picture everyone naked.
In my mind, I'm the one with clothes on.
Feeling a little exposed.
I meant, uh, just women.
Feeling a little rejected.
Look, it doesn't matter anyway.
Kat's with Benjamin.
That's true.
And Benjamin is great.
Picturing him naked? Nope, he's wearing a hat.
So this is an elegant spot.
Look, I wanna thank you boys.
Not just for fixing my house, but also-- Well, I'm away on business a lot and it can get lonely for the little lady.
So I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate how much you've kept her company.
It's our pleasure.
I wouldn't say pleasure.
Not pleasure.
Well, anyway, it means a lot to me.
Nick's a real special girl.
Of course, I don't have to tell you that.
'Cause I went out with her? That was high school.
That's ancient history.
Now I could take or leave her.
Not that I'd take her.
I bet Rich likes her better than I do.
Oh, really? Red, do I gotta worry about you being around my wife? How did that happen? I'm just kidding you.
But I wouldn't blame you.
I treasure that girl.
She is absolutely everything-- Would you look at the snacks on that one? Well, hello there.
Well, hello there to you.
So did your son leave these here or you going through a Batman phase? Sorry, he's always leaving them around.
It's hard to take a superhero seriously when he's covering a little boy's pee-pee.
So listen, dude.
There's something that I wanna do that I've never done before.
Really? Is it dirty.
Easy there, Benny Hill.
All right.
So I been staying over here a lot lately, right? And I was thinking instead of using your toothbrush, which I've never, ever done, I thought maybe it would be okay if I left this here.
Wow.
This is big.
Shut up, okay.
It's big for me.
All right.
Here we go.
Do do do do It's too big.
It won't fit in the hole.
Hey, it turns out it is dirty.
Who is it? Lina.
Oh, just a sec.
Hey.
Hey, what's up? I'm picking up Richie.
Oh, he's still out to lunch with Yonk and Duncan.
What's with all the clothes? Oh, um, they're for charity.
There's' a lot.
I'm a giver.
Even your bras? Well, just 'cause your poor doesn't mean you can't look perky.
Oh! I love this coat.
Yeah, I know.
Isn't it great.
Then why are you giving it away? Well, it's too warm and plush.
It's disgusting.
Well, I'll take it.
Wow.
I'd feel funny taking it from the charity people.
Okay, well, I'll write them a check.
Huh.
Can't think of anything wrong with that.
And I'm trying.
Great! I love shopping here.
What else you got? Oh, I have to have this dress.
And definitely this top.
You can't have the top! What? You can't have the top! Or the dress! The store's closed! Thanks for shopping! Wait, wait, wait.
What's going on? Okay.
They're not for charity.
I'm packing up my stuff.
Why? I'm leaving.
I'm leaving Yonk.
Oh, my God.
And I have to tell him when he comes home from lunch.
And I have to have everything packed up by then.
And it feels like I'm packing for the rest of my life.
And will I need flip-flops? I don't know.
Come here.
Come here.
You're gonna be okay.
I'm gonna help you pack.
Really? Mm-hmm.
Thank you.
So-- You can't have the coat.
Okay.
Hi, Jonah.
Hi, Dr.
Haas.
Hey, Benjamin.
Ethan, how've you been? Oh, can't complain.
All right.
How's my man? Good.
Ready for your check-up? Uh-huh.
All righty.
Let's see.
Two arms, two legs.
That seems right.
Hello.
Of course.
Orchestra conductor.
I have to take this.
Jonah, you be a good boy for Dr.
Haas, okay? Okay.
So that is a pretty sweet helicopter.
Where'd you get it? Susan.
Aw, that's nice.
Is Susan your friend? Susan's my daddy's girlfriend.
Uh, I don't think so.
Kat is your daddy's girlfriend.
Nuh-uh.
Yuh-huh.
No, I know her.
She's a friend of mine.
Are you gonna check my throat? In a sec.
Okay, so just to be clear, your daddy's girlfriend's name is Susan.
Not Kat? Susan has a cat.
No.
Not a meow cat.
A lady named Kat.
My friend Marshall has a dog named Lady.
Is that what I asked? Look the lights go on.
Okay.
We're all over the map here.
So when you say your dad's girlfriend Susan, do you mean his girl who is his friend? Uh-huh.
Oh! Okay, so she's his friend friend.
Like they do stuff together.
Yeah, like drink wine and sleep over.
Oh, my God.
Lord have mercy.
How good were those T-bones? How much did we just eat? Two and a half pounds.
We each ate two and a half pounds of meat.
I am literally sweating cow.
Well, this was great.
Thank you so much.
No, no, no.
You can't leave till you have the cheesecake.
You're an animal.
You know what? We really should be getting back.
No, you gotta try it.
It's like sugar and fat making love on a plate.
As much as I wanna have that in my mouth I'm supposed to meet Lina.
Call her and tell her you're gonna be late.
You gotta have the cheesecake and you gotta hit the john.
The toilets have saddles.
What level of hell is this? Hey.
Hey, so listen.
We're running a little late.
A crazy hillbilly is trying to kill me with food.
Oh, that's okay 'cause I'm kinda tied up here.
I'm helping Nicole pack.
Is that Richie? What's she packing for? Uh, I'll tell you later.
Much later.
Never.
Gotta go.
Love you.
So? She's busy helping Nicole pack.
What do you mean "pack?" Pack for what? What's Nicole packing for? Uh, Lina didn't say.
Oh, man, I bet she's gonna surprise me with a trip or something.
Hey, you know what'd be funny? I'll call her up and say, "What are you packing for?" It'll freak her out! Oh, I bet it would.
Gimme your phone, Rich.
Don't do that.
Oh, come on.
Let's bust her.
No! What'd you do? I'm so sorry about hitting you, man.
I just really don't think you should ruin the surprise.
I suppose you're right.
She went to all that trouble.
Again, man, I'm sorry about the hit.
Oh, that's all right.
I know it came from a good-- Ow! Now we're even.
Yeah, but I wasn't wearing a Super Bowl ring.
Anyway, if she's gonna take me on a trip, I better cancel some meetings.
Listen, order some cheesecake and tell 'em no strawberries on top.
We didn't come here to eat fruit.
Oh, God.
What? You almost-- Never mind.
Just don't talk about her packing anymore, okay? Why? What's she packing for? How is that not talking about it? Why are you so-- Oh, my God! No! No.
Is she packing to-- You stop it, you stop it, you stop it! You don't know what you don't know.
I think know what I don't know.
Do I know? Oh, no! Hey.
Can you talk? Yeah, just for a second.
Are you all packed? No, it's taking longer than I thought.
And Lina keeps trying things on.
Okay, well, you gotta hurry, okay? We all ready finished lunch.
Oh, no.
Then you've gotta stall him.
Keep him there as long as you can.
Are you kidding me? I'll call you as soon as I'm packed.
Fine.
What's happening? We've gotta stall him.
Stall him? What else can we do? I've all ready eaten a rodeo! Seriously, I'm burping hooves.
Hey, how's it going? You're going to be very proud of me.
Really? Were you nice to someone? Yeah, right.
Benjamin and I had kind of a milestone.
Starting today, I have my own toothbrush at his place.
Today? Awesome! So I got your message.
What's up? Um, I had Benjamin's kid in my office today, and he was talking about his daddy's girlfriend.
Really? Wow, I just met him for, like, a second.
Must've made quite an impression.
Actually, he was talking about someone named Susan.
Who's Susan? According to Jonah, she's Benjamin's girlfriend.
What are you talking about? He says that Benjamin has a girlfriend named Susan.
What?! Well, he's wrong.
What does he know? He's a kid! Kids are stupid.
Their heads aren't even fully formed.
May be taking some medical liberties there.
I don't care.
I mean, I would know if Benjamin was seeing somebody else.
Look, I don't want it to be true.
It totally sucks, but I couldn't not tell you.
I'm sorry.
I don't want your pity hug.
Ow, ow.
I'm a doctor! I need my hands! It's not true, okay? And you can either believe me or your little buddy, that three-foot pile of lies.
Okay, fine.
Then forget I even told you.
Well, how can I do that now? God! I can't believe you told me this! I was having the best freaking day.
Oh, what about my day? You think I like having to tell you this? Are you making this about you? No! Well, boys, this was a treat.
Wait, wait, wait.
We're not done, are we? You're kidding.
You still got room? Yeah, I could go for some more.
Maybe some pie or a bowl of chili.
How about you, Rich? You're like a mind reader.
Sorry, guys.
I gotta get home.
Uh, um.
Wait! What? We still have to, um ride the bull.
You serious? I must be.
I said it.
Man, I haven't done that in years.
But what the hell.
All right, Red.
It was your idea.
You go first.
That seems fair.
Don't forget the hat.
I guess this will protect my brain.
What was my time? Benjamin? Hello? In here.
What a nice surprise.
Fancy.
Concert tonight? Yes, I'm playing Mozart's Fifth Concerto in A minor.
Yeah, I love that song.
Quick question.
Who's Susan? What? Who's Susan? Jonah told Ethan that your girlfriend's name is Susan.
I-I don't-- I-I-I don't-- Well, I mean-- Please stop.
Wow.
Okay, so just to be clear, um, every time we went to the movies, there was a Susan.
And every time you kissed me, there was a Susan.
Every time I told you something that I have never told anyone-- I'm sorry.
I don't care.
Look, may I just-- Uh.
If you wanna play that Mozart thing tonight, you better put those fingers away.
We're done here.
And by the way, I hate classical music.
And your accent sounds fake.
You don't get any part of me.
Please tell me you're packed.
We just got the last bag in the car.
So this is it.
It's gonna be okay, right? Hey, it's gonna be okay.
God, I hope so.
I don't wanna hurt him.
I love you so much.
I love you too.
I still got it.
I never had it.
Okay, here he comes.
I gotta go.
You c-- Hang on.
Oh, my God! What? What's going on? What? What?