Wander Over Yonder (2013) s01e18 Episode Script
The Big Job; The Helper
1 Our target, Lord Hater's top secret research facility.
Our mission, sneak in and destroy Hater's latest diabolical invention, the HT-125-F, before he can utilize it.
Who are we? The craziest rag-tag band of rebels in the galaxy.
The insurgent generals! General Outrage.
I'm all about mission, mayhem, manliness.
Brainz.
I compute our chances of success to be totally awesome! Wild Card.
You never know when I'm gonna rutabaga candy corn.
Clipper.
I'll clip you.
Smash & Sass.
Hiii-yaaa! Oh, no, I didn't! And the lovable wandering wanderer, Wander.
- Can I help you, son? - Sir, Sylvia, aka Smash & Sass.
First day on the team.
Huge fan of your work.
- Really appreciate the call to try out.
- You gettin' to a point, soldier? Look, this little fur ball is my best pal.
I know he seems like a skinny, clueless weakling.
Believe me, he always manages to get the job done in his own weird little way.
Okay, son, listen up.
We're gonna sneak in there and destroy Lord Hater's latest evil technology, the dreaded HT-125-F.
We're gonna destroy the HT-125-F.
You're gonna guard the front door, and make sure no one comes in.
If he flings this up, it's on you.
Look, I really wanna make a good impression on these guys, So just focus, and it shouldn't be hard, okay? And remember, don't let anyone in.
Don't let anyone in.
I got this.
Hyah! Hut, hut, hut, hut! I don't let anyone in I don't let anyone in no, no, no, don't let anyone in don't let anyone in Thank you.
don't let anyone in Oh, nooo! Sylvia.
Wander, what are you doing here? Why aren't you guarding the door? Well, remember how you said don't let anyone in? - Well, I sort of did that thing.
- What?! Ow! Smash & Sass, what's going on back there? I-okay.
Go, insurgents.
I'm sorry.
What should I do? Find the guy, knock him out, say something sassy.
You know, Smash & Sass.
Okay, okay.
Don't do that.
Just figure out a way to get him out of here.
Where are my keys? I know I left them somewhere.
Excuse me, Mr.
Scientist.
You go away! You go away from this building.
You go away now.
Go! Shoo! Who are you? Sylvia? - Night janitor.
- Oh, I see.
Then who is that? So Hater hired a newer, younger and prettier janitor, huh? Well, you listen to me, pal.
I ain't goin' without a fight! Well? Ah, you know, I bet I left my keys in the lab with the HT-125-F.
The HT-125-F?! Sylvia! I think I saw your keys outside.
- Oh, look, here they are in this bush.
- No, I hate that bush.
I never go near it.
I will go search the lab.
Wait! What you got here is your standard evil overlord secret lair lock.
Seen it a million times.
Thank you.
I hope this hug is acceptable compensation.
Just let me use your restroom, and we'll call it even.
Well, I'm really not supposed to let anybody in the building.
Oh, come on.
Please.
I'll leave as soon as I'm done.
I promise.
Sure Oh, rats! Out of order.
Well, guess you'll have to go somewhere else.
No.
I promised I'd leave as soon as I'm done, and a locksmith never breaks a promise.
What are you doing? Don't worry, I got a buddy who can totally handle this.
Wait, no! It's worse than I thought.
Gonna be here all night.
- Better order a pizza.
- Wait, no! - Um, Sylvia? - Wander, who are all those people? I don't know.
They keep coming and coming, and never going.
What do I do? Get them out of here before they accidentally find us.
Smash & Sass, everything okay? I-okay.
Go, insurgents.
- But how? - I don't care how.
Just do it quickly.
And do it quietly.
Plasma leak! Totally dangerous, poisonous.
So everybody better leave now.
No! - Hey, buddy, what's wrong? - Oh, nothing.
It's just that I really need you all to leave so my best friend's dream of being a big top action hero can come true.
- No biggie, though.
- Sure thing, little guy.
Our job is to put a stop to plasma leaks, not dreams.
Come on, fellas.
Pipe's all fixed.
Pipe's all fixed.
I promise.
Because a locksmith never breaks a promise.
Sorry about the mess.
I got anger management issues.
Probably why they replaced me.
Good luck, pretty boy.
Wowie! Look.
The HT-125-F.
We need to turn off its protective shield.
Brainz! Deactivating the force field by putting the command key into the two keyholes?! We're missing a key! Wait.
What's he doing here? - He's supposed to be guarding the door.
- Intruders! Don't move.
Lord Hater will be here any minute.
Oh, no, I didn't.
Smash & Sass.
Hater'll be here any second, and he's gonna totally carpet square artichoke! You said he wouldn't be a problem.
You let him in, he let that science guy in, and now we got Hater comin' to cook our keisters.
Bringing you along was a mistake.
If we make it out of here alive, you're off the team.
Guys, don't blame Sylvia.
Blame me.
I was a big dummy to think I could be as cool or heroic as any of you.
Especially my best friend.
I'm not a hero or a tough guy.
I'm just a worthless wandering wanderer, Wander.
And also a janitor.
- Oh, hey, the scientist's keys.
- The keys! The second key for the code box.
Wander, get over here.
Let's blow this joint.
Just a little shorter.
Go, go, go, go, go, go! There's one more mess to clean up.
Wander, no! Wow, way to go insurgents! I get great enjoyment when a plan works out accordingly.
Hater may have had an evil plan, and now, because of the big job we pulled off today, he will never be able to heat his hot tub.
- Whoa, what now? - HT-125-F hot tub.
Heat it to 125 degrees flargenhatz just the way Hater likes it.
Yeah, and who knows.
Maybe he'll be so upset that his hot tub won't work that he won't try to take over the universe or something really evil like that.
Pot holder.
Okay, now I know you're crazy.
Hey, cut it out.
He's sensitive.
We don't want Hater mad at us.
Have you seen that guy? He's scary.
Insurgents, ho! Smash & Sass, up top.
You know what? The name's Sylvia.
And I'm already part of an awesome team.
Sylvia, look! What am I lookin' at? See it now? - I see a man changing a tire.
- Yeah.
- And? - And he needs help.
Hello! You there.
I couldn't help but notice you're having some mechanical issues.
My friend and I were traveling along when we spotted you, and it seemed like, well, maybe you could use some help.
Well, you know, it just so happens I really, really like to help.
So when we saw you here, I just couldn't resist.
Please don't you worry about a thing.
There is nothing more in the world I would rather do than help.
- How'd that go? - Oh, uh Ha.
Okay, I guess.
Funny thing, though.
That guy, he - Didn't need your help? - Yeah.
How'd you guess? Strange as it may seem, Wander, there's a time to help, - and there's a time to - Hello! Hey there! Hi, friend.
Which way you headed? - What? - I said, which way you headed? You goin' upways, downways, sideways, - Northways, North by Northwestways? - Why'd you ask? Oh, this? I was just givin' you a thumbs up.
I really like your hat.
Like those shoes, too.
So then, you're not in need of a ride? A ride? Of course I am.
Been waiting here for hours.
Here comes my ride now, right on time.
It's like I told you, Wander.
There's a time to help, and a time to not help.
- Sylvia, did you hear that? - Yeah, I did.
It sounded like scree, scree, scree.
Scree! Don't worry, little birdie! I'll help you Birdie, wait.
Birdie, do you need help finding the way South? How about which worms taste good? Name of a good dentist? Any thing? Look at it this way.
It's a good thing not everybody needs - your help all the time.
- Why? Well, you wouldn't want to sprain your help gland.
- My what? - I don't know.
I just made it up.
I'm sorry, Wander.
I was just trying to No, Sylvia, you're right.
Nobody needs any help today.
So let's just relax and enjoy the rest of the day.
Exactly.
Hey, look, there's a relaxing little town down there.
A town? I bet there's lots of people there who need help.
Who-hoo! Moppin' up floors, openin' doors there ain't nothin' that I wouldn't do to lighten your load smooth out the bump in your road maybe sort your socks and underwear too oh, H-E-L-P-E-R, I'm a helper means I like to help oh, I'm just an accommodatin' fella life is hard, you shouldn't have to do it by yourself limping off a road put my hat in the mud if that's what I have to do Hey, Wander, you know this town is actually pretty cool.
There's a killer lemonade stand on the next corner.
Oh, I see you found the fudge shop.
It's not fudge.
Look at this pair of shades I picked up At the second-hand shop down the street.
Aren't they everything?! I got some for you, too.
- Oh, and there was also - It's not fudge.
It's mud.
Oh, you found the mud pie shop.
- I love mud pies.
We should - Not mud pies!! - Just mud.
- Help!! Hold that thought.
Help! Oh, somebody, help me! I'll help you.
- Howdy, ma'am.
- Hold it! Would someone mind explaining to me just what is going on around here?! You mean That's right! We're making a movie.
Uh Help.
Hold it! What's that guy doing on set? You mean That's right.
We're making a movie about making a movie.
There you are, Wander.
Man, there is a really great street market just down the uh, street.
I picked up this festive scarf.
Oh, and check this out.
Whoa.
How about we grab a bite and relax? Gosh, you were right, Syl.
There's nothing that a triple pickle cream pie can't solve.
I guess I did get a little carried away back there.
- You think? - Some days, folks don't need a-helpin'.
Exactly.
I mean, it's not like Hater is gonna show up with his army of watchdogs, and try to take over the town or something.
Hater.
Watchdogs.
Taking over the town.
You know what this means? - Check, please? - No.
It means it's time to help! Fear not, folks.
I got this.
Saving the day! How can I help you? I'm so glad you asked Michelle.
Because we would like to three, four Oh, forget it.
Just let me have 5,075 frivolity meals, - 689 pies, and two diet colas - Hold it! Okay, I know what you're here for, Lord Hater, but, unfortunately for you, I'm here to help these people, so you're just gonna have to get right back on your ship.
What's goin' on over here, Michelle? I'm not sure, sir.
He just hopped up there and, uh I'm sorry, son, but I'm gonna have to ask you to come down from there right now.
We're simply not insured for that kind of But he's gonna take over your town, and I'm here to help.
- Take over? He's here - Ow! to take out his lunch.
Sorry, Michelle.
Now please come down from there before someone gets hurt.
His lunch? That's not possible.
Of course it's possible! These guys have the best triple pickle pies in the universe.
Thank you.
We take great pride in our pies.
Thank you.
Come again.
Now, son I gotta help!! You, need your necktie straightened? How about you? Shoelaces tied? Your glasses polished? Can I help you carry your ice cream cone? I only wanted to help.
Wake up, son.
Can you hear me? Son, can you hear me? Sorry about the pies.
That's okay.
We cleaned 'em up.
Did you need any help? No, son, we took care of it, but there is one thing we could really use your help with.
Really? What is it? Anything, anything! Well, there's somebody we need you to run out of town.
Of course.
Where is he? Show him to me! Oh! So this is the guy you want out of town.
- I get it.
- You do? - Look, son, we only - I will not rest until that guy is out of here once and for all.
So you're the one they want run out of town.
So they say.
Well, lucky for them, I'm here to help.
Hey! Oh, you caught me.
I'm goin', I'm goin'! And stay out! Ooh! Son? - Thanks.
- Happy I could help.
That makes two of us.
Hmmm.
Pass the mustard.
Did they change these fries? Oh, so good.
Oh, man I am making such a mess.
Hey, Peepers, pass me some of those napkins.
Ah! Oh, that's what I'm talkin' about.
Mmm! So good!
Our mission, sneak in and destroy Hater's latest diabolical invention, the HT-125-F, before he can utilize it.
Who are we? The craziest rag-tag band of rebels in the galaxy.
The insurgent generals! General Outrage.
I'm all about mission, mayhem, manliness.
Brainz.
I compute our chances of success to be totally awesome! Wild Card.
You never know when I'm gonna rutabaga candy corn.
Clipper.
I'll clip you.
Smash & Sass.
Hiii-yaaa! Oh, no, I didn't! And the lovable wandering wanderer, Wander.
- Can I help you, son? - Sir, Sylvia, aka Smash & Sass.
First day on the team.
Huge fan of your work.
- Really appreciate the call to try out.
- You gettin' to a point, soldier? Look, this little fur ball is my best pal.
I know he seems like a skinny, clueless weakling.
Believe me, he always manages to get the job done in his own weird little way.
Okay, son, listen up.
We're gonna sneak in there and destroy Lord Hater's latest evil technology, the dreaded HT-125-F.
We're gonna destroy the HT-125-F.
You're gonna guard the front door, and make sure no one comes in.
If he flings this up, it's on you.
Look, I really wanna make a good impression on these guys, So just focus, and it shouldn't be hard, okay? And remember, don't let anyone in.
Don't let anyone in.
I got this.
Hyah! Hut, hut, hut, hut! I don't let anyone in I don't let anyone in no, no, no, don't let anyone in don't let anyone in Thank you.
don't let anyone in Oh, nooo! Sylvia.
Wander, what are you doing here? Why aren't you guarding the door? Well, remember how you said don't let anyone in? - Well, I sort of did that thing.
- What?! Ow! Smash & Sass, what's going on back there? I-okay.
Go, insurgents.
I'm sorry.
What should I do? Find the guy, knock him out, say something sassy.
You know, Smash & Sass.
Okay, okay.
Don't do that.
Just figure out a way to get him out of here.
Where are my keys? I know I left them somewhere.
Excuse me, Mr.
Scientist.
You go away! You go away from this building.
You go away now.
Go! Shoo! Who are you? Sylvia? - Night janitor.
- Oh, I see.
Then who is that? So Hater hired a newer, younger and prettier janitor, huh? Well, you listen to me, pal.
I ain't goin' without a fight! Well? Ah, you know, I bet I left my keys in the lab with the HT-125-F.
The HT-125-F?! Sylvia! I think I saw your keys outside.
- Oh, look, here they are in this bush.
- No, I hate that bush.
I never go near it.
I will go search the lab.
Wait! What you got here is your standard evil overlord secret lair lock.
Seen it a million times.
Thank you.
I hope this hug is acceptable compensation.
Just let me use your restroom, and we'll call it even.
Well, I'm really not supposed to let anybody in the building.
Oh, come on.
Please.
I'll leave as soon as I'm done.
I promise.
Sure Oh, rats! Out of order.
Well, guess you'll have to go somewhere else.
No.
I promised I'd leave as soon as I'm done, and a locksmith never breaks a promise.
What are you doing? Don't worry, I got a buddy who can totally handle this.
Wait, no! It's worse than I thought.
Gonna be here all night.
- Better order a pizza.
- Wait, no! - Um, Sylvia? - Wander, who are all those people? I don't know.
They keep coming and coming, and never going.
What do I do? Get them out of here before they accidentally find us.
Smash & Sass, everything okay? I-okay.
Go, insurgents.
- But how? - I don't care how.
Just do it quickly.
And do it quietly.
Plasma leak! Totally dangerous, poisonous.
So everybody better leave now.
No! - Hey, buddy, what's wrong? - Oh, nothing.
It's just that I really need you all to leave so my best friend's dream of being a big top action hero can come true.
- No biggie, though.
- Sure thing, little guy.
Our job is to put a stop to plasma leaks, not dreams.
Come on, fellas.
Pipe's all fixed.
Pipe's all fixed.
I promise.
Because a locksmith never breaks a promise.
Sorry about the mess.
I got anger management issues.
Probably why they replaced me.
Good luck, pretty boy.
Wowie! Look.
The HT-125-F.
We need to turn off its protective shield.
Brainz! Deactivating the force field by putting the command key into the two keyholes?! We're missing a key! Wait.
What's he doing here? - He's supposed to be guarding the door.
- Intruders! Don't move.
Lord Hater will be here any minute.
Oh, no, I didn't.
Smash & Sass.
Hater'll be here any second, and he's gonna totally carpet square artichoke! You said he wouldn't be a problem.
You let him in, he let that science guy in, and now we got Hater comin' to cook our keisters.
Bringing you along was a mistake.
If we make it out of here alive, you're off the team.
Guys, don't blame Sylvia.
Blame me.
I was a big dummy to think I could be as cool or heroic as any of you.
Especially my best friend.
I'm not a hero or a tough guy.
I'm just a worthless wandering wanderer, Wander.
And also a janitor.
- Oh, hey, the scientist's keys.
- The keys! The second key for the code box.
Wander, get over here.
Let's blow this joint.
Just a little shorter.
Go, go, go, go, go, go! There's one more mess to clean up.
Wander, no! Wow, way to go insurgents! I get great enjoyment when a plan works out accordingly.
Hater may have had an evil plan, and now, because of the big job we pulled off today, he will never be able to heat his hot tub.
- Whoa, what now? - HT-125-F hot tub.
Heat it to 125 degrees flargenhatz just the way Hater likes it.
Yeah, and who knows.
Maybe he'll be so upset that his hot tub won't work that he won't try to take over the universe or something really evil like that.
Pot holder.
Okay, now I know you're crazy.
Hey, cut it out.
He's sensitive.
We don't want Hater mad at us.
Have you seen that guy? He's scary.
Insurgents, ho! Smash & Sass, up top.
You know what? The name's Sylvia.
And I'm already part of an awesome team.
Sylvia, look! What am I lookin' at? See it now? - I see a man changing a tire.
- Yeah.
- And? - And he needs help.
Hello! You there.
I couldn't help but notice you're having some mechanical issues.
My friend and I were traveling along when we spotted you, and it seemed like, well, maybe you could use some help.
Well, you know, it just so happens I really, really like to help.
So when we saw you here, I just couldn't resist.
Please don't you worry about a thing.
There is nothing more in the world I would rather do than help.
- How'd that go? - Oh, uh Ha.
Okay, I guess.
Funny thing, though.
That guy, he - Didn't need your help? - Yeah.
How'd you guess? Strange as it may seem, Wander, there's a time to help, - and there's a time to - Hello! Hey there! Hi, friend.
Which way you headed? - What? - I said, which way you headed? You goin' upways, downways, sideways, - Northways, North by Northwestways? - Why'd you ask? Oh, this? I was just givin' you a thumbs up.
I really like your hat.
Like those shoes, too.
So then, you're not in need of a ride? A ride? Of course I am.
Been waiting here for hours.
Here comes my ride now, right on time.
It's like I told you, Wander.
There's a time to help, and a time to not help.
- Sylvia, did you hear that? - Yeah, I did.
It sounded like scree, scree, scree.
Scree! Don't worry, little birdie! I'll help you Birdie, wait.
Birdie, do you need help finding the way South? How about which worms taste good? Name of a good dentist? Any thing? Look at it this way.
It's a good thing not everybody needs - your help all the time.
- Why? Well, you wouldn't want to sprain your help gland.
- My what? - I don't know.
I just made it up.
I'm sorry, Wander.
I was just trying to No, Sylvia, you're right.
Nobody needs any help today.
So let's just relax and enjoy the rest of the day.
Exactly.
Hey, look, there's a relaxing little town down there.
A town? I bet there's lots of people there who need help.
Who-hoo! Moppin' up floors, openin' doors there ain't nothin' that I wouldn't do to lighten your load smooth out the bump in your road maybe sort your socks and underwear too oh, H-E-L-P-E-R, I'm a helper means I like to help oh, I'm just an accommodatin' fella life is hard, you shouldn't have to do it by yourself limping off a road put my hat in the mud if that's what I have to do Hey, Wander, you know this town is actually pretty cool.
There's a killer lemonade stand on the next corner.
Oh, I see you found the fudge shop.
It's not fudge.
Look at this pair of shades I picked up At the second-hand shop down the street.
Aren't they everything?! I got some for you, too.
- Oh, and there was also - It's not fudge.
It's mud.
Oh, you found the mud pie shop.
- I love mud pies.
We should - Not mud pies!! - Just mud.
- Help!! Hold that thought.
Help! Oh, somebody, help me! I'll help you.
- Howdy, ma'am.
- Hold it! Would someone mind explaining to me just what is going on around here?! You mean That's right! We're making a movie.
Uh Help.
Hold it! What's that guy doing on set? You mean That's right.
We're making a movie about making a movie.
There you are, Wander.
Man, there is a really great street market just down the uh, street.
I picked up this festive scarf.
Oh, and check this out.
Whoa.
How about we grab a bite and relax? Gosh, you were right, Syl.
There's nothing that a triple pickle cream pie can't solve.
I guess I did get a little carried away back there.
- You think? - Some days, folks don't need a-helpin'.
Exactly.
I mean, it's not like Hater is gonna show up with his army of watchdogs, and try to take over the town or something.
Hater.
Watchdogs.
Taking over the town.
You know what this means? - Check, please? - No.
It means it's time to help! Fear not, folks.
I got this.
Saving the day! How can I help you? I'm so glad you asked Michelle.
Because we would like to three, four Oh, forget it.
Just let me have 5,075 frivolity meals, - 689 pies, and two diet colas - Hold it! Okay, I know what you're here for, Lord Hater, but, unfortunately for you, I'm here to help these people, so you're just gonna have to get right back on your ship.
What's goin' on over here, Michelle? I'm not sure, sir.
He just hopped up there and, uh I'm sorry, son, but I'm gonna have to ask you to come down from there right now.
We're simply not insured for that kind of But he's gonna take over your town, and I'm here to help.
- Take over? He's here - Ow! to take out his lunch.
Sorry, Michelle.
Now please come down from there before someone gets hurt.
His lunch? That's not possible.
Of course it's possible! These guys have the best triple pickle pies in the universe.
Thank you.
We take great pride in our pies.
Thank you.
Come again.
Now, son I gotta help!! You, need your necktie straightened? How about you? Shoelaces tied? Your glasses polished? Can I help you carry your ice cream cone? I only wanted to help.
Wake up, son.
Can you hear me? Son, can you hear me? Sorry about the pies.
That's okay.
We cleaned 'em up.
Did you need any help? No, son, we took care of it, but there is one thing we could really use your help with.
Really? What is it? Anything, anything! Well, there's somebody we need you to run out of town.
Of course.
Where is he? Show him to me! Oh! So this is the guy you want out of town.
- I get it.
- You do? - Look, son, we only - I will not rest until that guy is out of here once and for all.
So you're the one they want run out of town.
So they say.
Well, lucky for them, I'm here to help.
Hey! Oh, you caught me.
I'm goin', I'm goin'! And stay out! Ooh! Son? - Thanks.
- Happy I could help.
That makes two of us.
Hmmm.
Pass the mustard.
Did they change these fries? Oh, so good.
Oh, man I am making such a mess.
Hey, Peepers, pass me some of those napkins.
Ah! Oh, that's what I'm talkin' about.
Mmm! So good!