Empty Nest (1988) s01e19 Episode Script

Life goes on and so do we just how we do it is no mystery One by one, we fill the days We find a thousand different ways Sometimes the answer can be hard to find That's something I will never be I'm always here for anything that you need rain or shine I'll be the one to share it all as life goes on We share it all as life goes on "and so "In closing, I say to you, the Florida alumni association "of good old bedford med school, "thank you for honoring me as man of the year, "you marvelous, magnificent masters of medicine.
" You like that, the alliteration of the four "m" s: The marvelous, magnificent masters of medicine? Mm, maybe.
Sounds fine, daddy.
Just fine.
Oh, it's gonna be a great night.
I bet grandpa's impressed.
By the way, what time does his plane get in? You know, when he called, he didn't say.
It's typical.
Never tell anybody what your plans are.
That's my father.
Daddy, he's 82 years old.
He's bound to be a little erratic.
The man is still chief of surgery at Boston community.
He's not erratic.
He knows exactly what he's doing: Driving his son up the wall.
Daddy, please, promise me you won't spend the whole time arguing with grandpa when he gets here.
After all, it can't be easy for him now that edna's left him.
You mean Emma? Edna was his third wife.
I thought Ella was his third wife.
Ella was his fourth wife.
Look, first there was grandma Ellen, my mother, then there was Erica, edna, Ella, and Emma.
Boy, he sure has a thing for women whose names begin with "e.
" Yeah, I know, I've heard of leg men and chest men.
Leave it to my father to be a vowel man.
Hey, Harry, congratulations.
Says here you're man of the year.
That's my alumni magazine.
Where'd you get it? You told me to pick up your mail.
When I'm away.
What am I, a mind-reader? Man of the year, that's quite an honor, even coming from a dinky school like bedford.
Bedford is not dinky, Charley.
It ranks right up there with Harvard med and Johns Hopkins.
It's gonna be so exciting.
We're gonna have a bunch of daddy's friends over for a cocktail party.
- Party? - Barbara.
Ix-nay in front of the uts-pay.
What time you want me here? Charley, you are not invited, so you can just forget it.
Oh.
Well.
Fine.
Okay.
If I'm not good enough to come to your party, I guess I'm also not good enough to accept your breakfast.
No.
I'm not gonna put myself down like that.
I've got too much pride.
I am good enough to accept your breakfast.
Daddy, what are you doing? I'm trying to make this visit with your grandfather as painless as possible.
I've got the 75-watt bulbs, not the 60s.
I've got the thermostat set at exactly 67.
I have three pillows, not two, foam rubber, not feathers.
And oh, no! I forgot to get rid of that stuff that makes the water turn blue.
Gonna have to do that I don't know why you two don't get along.
I adore grandpa.
Well, that's because you never had to deal with a difficult father.
I assume that was a sneeze, Carol.
God bless you.
Well, I'm sorry, daddy, but I do adore him, and I think it's great that he's coming down here because his son is man of the year.
Dear, this has nothing to do with me.
He's coming down here this weekend to be with his cronies.
He wants to socialize.
I think he's coming down here because he's proud of you.
Oh, dear, believe me, I wish he were coming down because he's proud of me, but I've never gotten his approval about anything.
A birthday watch, yes.
Approval, no.
- Ever? - Ever.
The only advice he ever gave me about anything was, "don't screw it up.
" Okay, well, it's aqua now.
We're getting closer.
Daddy, if grandpa is so much trouble, why do you put up with him at all? Because the one time in my life I really needed him, he came through for me.
If it weren't for your grandfather, I never would have gotten into bedford medical.
I know he put the pressure on because my grades, although they were good, were not bedford good.
Anyway, the day I got accepted, I was so happy and I called him, and I said, "dad", "I know you had to twist a few arms "to get me into bedford, and I thank you.
" And he said, "what's a father for? "You're my son.
"Oh, by the way, you'll have a new mother Tuesday.
I'm getting married.
" So he drives me crazy.
I owe him.
Hi, guys.
Harry, about your party tonight.
Yeah.
I want to come.
You wouldn't have any fun, Charley.
It's for grown-ups.
No, Charley, I'm sorry, it's just for doctors and family.
But, gee whiz, I am family.
I love you people.
So what do you say? A simple "no" would have been good enough.
Oh, still the prettiest little thing in Miami, I see.
Oh, Dr.
Weston, sir, so good to see you.
You old darlin', sir.
Make that "Stanfield," not "Dr.
Weston, sir.
" Oh, Dr.
Weston, sir, I was so sorry to hear about your breakup with edna.
You mean Emma.
Edna was my third wife.
Say, you know something, Laverne, if you weren't a married woman, I'd ask you to run away with me.
Oh, and I'd take you up on that, but I don't want to be you-know-who's step-mama.
Where is my son? Is he still playing doctor around here? Oh, you wait in his office and I'll get him for you.
Oh, he's gonna be so tickled to see you.
- Harry! - Dad.
How the hell are you, son? Something wrong? You were hugging me.
What is that, an unnatural act or something? No, no, no.
No, sir.
No.
It's just a little unusual.
It's great to see you, dad.
How long since we've seen each other, six months? It's a year and a half.
Oh, that's right, I stopped over for a week on my way to the Bahamas.
Three days.
All right, but we still had a great time.
We fought all three days.
No wonder I don't have pictures.
Harry, I got a surprise for you.
I convinced the man of the year committee to let me introduce you tonight.
You're gonna introduce me? Yeah, and then later, present the award to you.
I don't know what to say.
That's really very nice, but I mean, you are the man who missed my graduation from bedford, missed my wedding to Libby, why are you doing this? Because you're my son, my issue.
You came from my loins, okay? Okay, but that's where it stopped.
When I got here, your loins took off for the hills.
What what what are we doing here? You're acting like a child.
I am a child, your child.
Listen.
Why, after all these years, are you now acting like a father? Because I have a son whom I love and I'm proud of, because he's man of the year.
And by the way, Harry, it's the end of the '80s, not the '30s.
When are you gonna stop parting your hair in the middle? You okay? I don't know.
I think for the first time in my adult life, I heard my father say he loved me.
I think he said he was proud of me.
Like he actually approved of me, not my hair, but me.
Well, I think that's sweet.
No, no, no, no.
No, that's sly old dog, he does everything for a reason.
And god love him, he's never been this nice to me.
There is something definitely very weird going on here.
Well, now, back home, we never look a gift horse in the mouth.
You shoe him, you brush him down.
You check his withers, you get him back in the corral with other horses, let him get acclimated Laverne.
What has this got to do with me and my father? Well, does everything have to be about you? Oh, no, thank you, Carol.
So doctor, I understand that congratulations are in order.
Yeah, you want to see? Oh.
You must be very proud.
I waited a long time, but it was worth it.
Dr.
George s.
Nagel, medical corporation.
Oh.
Harry, that was a great article you wrote for the medical journal.
Thank you, dear.
I appreciate that.
And you look beautiful.
Thank you.
And this is a great party.
And you, young lady, are a sensational hostess.
Well, it's easy when you're serving doctors.
"Cheese puff? Do you have a son? "Cheese puff? Do you have a son? Oh, you do? Caviar?" Congratulations, Harry.
Thank you, George, I appreciate that.
Oh, it can get pretty messy with profuse bleeding.
But when you cut, if you make the proper incision, there'll be very little scar tissue left around the pelvic area.
Fascinating.
Do you need any help in the kitchen? Nope.
Hello.
What do you want, Charley? Well, gee whiz.
Everybody is just about to leave now for the dinner downtown, otherwise I'd say, "hey, come on over to the party.
" Thanks, Carol.
I'll be right over.
I wonder if there are any single women here.
Hi.
I'm Dr.
Charles dietz.
Now, Royce, about my condition.
There's got to be something you can do about it.
Sorry, Stanfield.
You saw the results of your blood test.
You know what they mean.
Ooh.
Carol, we decided to give you a hand.
Oh, thank you.
You met my friend here, Dr.
Royce Garrison.
Yes, we met when you came in.
Likes cheese puffs.
No sons.
I'm surprised I haven't met you before.
I'm an old friend of your father's.
Oh, yeah, Royce was Dean of bedford med when your father was there.
Uh, grandpa, would you mind going into the den and making sure dreyfuss isn't getting overly friendly with one of the fur coats? Oh, he's a great gentleman, your grandfather.
A man like that should live forever.
Dr.
Garrison, I couldn't help but overhear.
Grandpa's got a medical problem? Well, I don't think he'd want me to discuss that with you, my dear.
Would you excuse me? I just remembered I got to tell Dr.
Morgan something.
You're kidding.
You're a gynecologist? I'm a gynecologist.
Of course, if you'd ever dissected an inflamed gallbladder, you'd recognize coagulated bile.
Uh, it's all right.
Put your beepers away.
That was probably Arnie, our dinner chairman, reminding us that we should be on our way to the hotel.
Course, I was kidding when you mentioned stirrups and I asked you what a horse was doing in your office.
Grandpa? Carol, you startled me.
It's time to go.
Oh, oh, right.
Um - Grandpa.
- Oh, my speech.
I bet I left it up on the dresser.
Carol, quick.
Hide me.
Dr.
disgusting wants a date.
Look.
He wrote his phone number on this napkin right over his cut-away drawing of the sinus cavity.
You know, I think the best thing that ever happened to me was going to bedford.
Oh, you did us proud.
Man of the year.
Smartest move I made was convincing that board to let you in in spite your borderline grades and your father's objections.
Uh, what? You know, it was the funniest thing when he got me out on the golf course and he said, "do my son a favor.
" "Don't let him in to medical school.
He'll never make it as a doctor.
" I bet you two shared a laugh when you heard that one.
Oh, yeah, we had a lot of laughs about that.
I wouldn't be surprised if we had another chuckle about it tonight.
Oh, good.
I'll see you at the hotel.
All right, Dr.
Garrison.
Sorry to keep you.
Had to wash my hands.
How could you have done that? I just washed my hands.
I didn't even use the guest towel.
All these years, you let me believe that you got me into bedford, and the truth is, you tried to keep me out? Why would you do that? Harry, who wants to talk about something that happened Harry.
Come on.
It's time for celebration.
Let's party.
Let's go pick up a couple of girls named Eleanor and do the town.
Just wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
You took credit for my getting into medical school.
And that's why you're here tonight, to introduce me to your cronies and take credit for me being man of the year.
This is my night.
I don't want you here.
Daddy.
You don't mean that.
No, no, no.
It's all right.
Anything you want.
It's your world.
I'm just living in it.
- Daddy.
- Never Listen, no, I know you love him, but what he did to me is unforgivable.
The only decent thing he ever did for me, he never did for me.
Daddy, grandpa's dying.
What? I overheard him telling Dr.
Garrison that he had a serious medical condition, and then when I asked Dr.
Garrison if grandpa was okay, he wouldn't talk about it.
And later, I saw grandpa sneaking some little white pills.
I think he came here to make peace with you, daddy, because he's dying.
Oh, my god.
Ugh.
Dad? Uh, dad? Uh, there is no way to put this delicately.
So I just may as well be direct.
If you want to know if you're illegitimate, yes.
Dad, Carol overheard a few things tonight, and she thinks that you've come down here this weekend to make peace with me because she thinks you're dying.
Dad? Dad, are you? Are you dying? Yes.
I'm dying.
Yeah.
Oh, my god.
Well, what's going on? What are you doing for it? Look, if I have any rights left at my age, I just would not like to discuss this now.
Uh, yes, sir I understand.
Is there anything I can do for you? What I'd really like to do is to go to that dinner and introduce my son as man of the year.
Hi, Dr.
Garrison, may I speak with you for just a moment, please? I know that my father came to see you recently for a physical.
Well, now, Harry, I don't yes, I know how we doctors protect one another, but I am in the club.
I am not only a doctor; I am his son.
Please, what's going on? Basically, his problem's his sex life.
Excuse me? He said he gets too tired afterward.
Too too tired afterwards, huh? Well, that frisky old son of a gun.
I told him to eat a chocolate bar before, and he might have some more energy for afterward.
That's his worry: The second time around.
The second time around? He needs a chocolate bar? So let me get this straight.
You actually have a table that does that? Go get 'em, Harry.
Son, I'm gonna give you the best piece of advice you ever had in your life.
Oh, really? Use the relish.
Kills the taste of the chicken.
I just had a little talk with Dr.
Garrison.
I must say, you have now established a new low in our relationship.
I mean, you've lied to me before, but this lie is outrageous.
Hey, Jimbo, you're looking great.
Thanks.
Real great.
You told me you were dying? Oh, no.
You asked me if I were dying.
I said yes, it's a natural process of life, Harry.
Just works out that way.
Listen.
Harry, I'm 82 years old.
How much time have I got left? What were those little white pills Carol saw you taking in the kitchen? Tic tacs.
Good evening, distinguished alumna.
Look, obviously you and I cannot get along.
Let's arrange that we never see each other ever again.
All right? Harry, you're not serious.
The class of 1930.
I would like to welcome Dr.
Stanfield Weston.
Dr.
Garrison, alumni, friends.
Nobody really asked me to come down here.
I invited myself.
'Cause it was something I wanted to do very much.
I was gonna read the usual speech, but I think I need this time to make a little confession.
I have misjudged Six people in my life.
Five of them, I'm paying alimony to.
But the sixth one, you're honoring here tonight.
I i never thought our bedford man of the year could make it as a doctor.
I even went so far as to recommend that he not get into bedford.
Pretty stupid, huh? Yeah, well, I saw no reason to stop there.
Because when he did get in, I let him think all these years that I was responsible.
I guess I just wanted to become a little bit of a hero, because the fact is, I never was much of a father to Harry, although I loved him.
I never really felt that he approved of me or that I'd earned his respect.
So i i just got in the habit of taking a step backwards from him instead of taking a step towards him.
Well, I guess that's what coming down here is really all about, kind of like a first step forward.
So anyway, I want to introduce to you the man that you chose to honor tonight: Brilliant physician, a wonderful father, and god knows, someone who really deserves the title of man of the year.
From the class of '58 Nine.
What? From the class of '59, ladies and gentlemen, my son, Dr.
Harry Weston.
You did really good here.
Well, go make your speech, and don't screw it up.
Sorry, I'm late.
Oh, I'm Dr.
Powell.
I'm Dr.
Stanfield Weston.
Call me elna.
- Elna? - Mm-hmm.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you Fellow alumni, members of the committee, Dr.
Garrison, and of course, Dr.
Stanfield Weston, my fa