The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! (1989) s01e19 Episode Script

Hey Paisanos!
It's the Super Mario
Brother's Super Show!
We're the Mario Brothers,
and plumbing's our game, ♪
we're not like the
others who get all the fame. ♪
If your sink is in trouble
you can call us on the double, ♪
we're faster than the
others you'll be hooked on the ♪
brothers Unh!
H-hooked on the brothers.
Gimme gimme, gimme gimme.
Yo, you're in for a treat,
so hang on to your seat, ♪
get ready for adventure
and remarkable feats. ♪
You'll meet Koopas, the
Troopas the Princess and the ♪
others, hanging with the
plumbers you'll be hooked on ♪
the brothers.
To the bridge!
Unh!
Unh!
I say h-h-h-h-hooked
on the brothers! ♪
The brothers!
The brothers! ♪
[Luigi:] Nothing like
shaving, my favourite mug,
haha.
Whilst using my
favourite shaving mug,
whilst preparing my
favourite spaghetti sauce.
[banging]
Mario?
Mario I've asked you a hundred
times please do not jump rope
in the apartment
with your boots on.
Mario?
Yo!
Geez I forgot, Mario
went to the store.
Oh boy.
Magic!
Magic Johnson!
How you doing?
Hi, I accidentally did a
triple-double-skyhook-ally-
-hoop-slam-dunk-jam on my
old high school trophy.
Can you fix it?
Are you kidding me?
I can fix that faster
than your fast break.
Wow now that's fast,
see you in a couple hours.
Alright Mag, see you later!
Magic Johnson, whoa!
Finally, a big
time repair job.
I must have a trophy
repair manual somewhere.
It's somewhere I'll find it.
Luigi!
Luigi I'm home!
Where's that Luigi?
Here I am Luigi.
Boy oh boy I'm telling ya,
good plumbers don't leave a
mess like this look at
all this stuff laying,
this is crazy.
A mess like this my brother I
gotta make him clean up I keep
tellin' him.
Messy stuff junk laying on
the into the furnace with
you.
Yo, yo!
It's the Mario Brothers
and plumbing's their game, ♪
found the secret warp zone
while working on the drain, ♪
lend the princess a
hand in the Mushroom Land. ♪
Comin' atcha
with the plumbers, ♪
you'll be hooked
on the brothers! ♪
Noooooow, Evil Koopa and his
Troopas are up to misbehaving, ♪
they kidnapped the princess;
Mushroom Land needs saving. ♪
Abusing and confusing
everybody he discovers, ♪
they can't help but be
hooked on the brothers! ♪
Unh! ♪
Plumber's
log, number 697.
Pirate waters, in
a Pirate World.
On our way back to
Princess Toadstool's castle,
we hired on as deckhands on
the only ship willing to sail,
these dark and
treacherous waters.
Avast tharr me buckos.
Huh?
I told you to
peel those potatoes,
not to turn 'em into strings!
We're making
spotatoghetti, sir.
Oops!
Sorry Captain Clump.
Watch it, ya mushheaded matey.
Why did I ever let You
dinghies man my ship?
Yeah, why did ya?
My real crew deserted.
Every sailor in the Caribbean
is scared to death of
Blackbeard Koopa.
[gasp]
Did you say Blackbeard Koopa?
Aye.
He's the plug ugliest pirate
who ever scuttled a ship and
stole a treasure.
Great!
And we thought a nice boat
trip would keep us safe from
Koopa.
No one's safe from
Blackbeard Koopa,
matey.
No one.
Great time for a
snack everyone,
except for the storm coming.
Storm?
What storm?
There's not a
cloud in-- [thunder]
The sky.
Ohhh!
[Toad:] Who turned
off the lights!?
Ooof!
[Mario:] Mama mia!
[Luigi:] Holy calamari.
What do you see Mario?
I see we should've
stayed in Brooklyn!
[Captain:]
Blackbeard Koopa's flag!
And Blackbeard
Koopa's pirate ship!
And Blackbeard Koopa himself.
[laughs]
Well, well, well.
Look what the tide washed up:
the muttonhead Marios and that
miserable little Mushroom.
Ah, and the Princess, what
perfect plunder for a pirate.
[laughs]
I gotcha now you
stupid jellyfish.
Surrender!
Surrender to a black-hearted
scoundrel like you?
Never!
Maybe we should take a
vote on that Captain.
Fire a warning shot.
On second thought, blow the
plumber boys and the princess
right off the boat.
[kaboom]
Bob-ombs away!
That way!
Oompf!
That wasn't very
nice, you puny plumber!
You thought you
could dupe the Koop,
did ya?
[laughs]
What do you want?
[kaboom]
Hee hee hee hee.
You blew that
one Koopa stoopa!
Oh yeah ya mangy
little Mushroom?
He who laughs
last, laughs best!
[laughs]
Koopa Pirate Pack, attack!
Hee-ya!
Yeeeeeow!
Whoooa!
Ahhh!
Go soak your head
you silly Troopa.
Hey!
Let go of me you
rotten reptile!
Help!
You promised not to harm my
friends if I came willingly.
Would Blackbeard Koopa lie?
Besides, you
didn't come willingly.
Koopa gives
pirates a bad name.
We gotta do something!
Hey, we could sing!
A hundred bottles
of milk on the wall, ♪
a hundred bottles of milk.
If one of the bottles
should happen to fall, ♪
ninety-nine bottles
of milk on the wall. ♪♪
[Koopa:] It's pirate party time!
I'm really not
dressed for the occasion.
I left my best gown
back in the castle.
Nonsense my dear, the
party's in your honour.
I'm selling you to the pirate
who can steal me the most gold
coins!
[laughs]
Leaping linguini!
That's a high sea!
Nope, it's a low ship!
We're sinking!
Shiver me timbers!
Blackbeard Koopa,
drilled me bow full of holes.
That rat, I'll make him
walk the plank for this!
That's if we don't end
up as fish food first!
Macaroni misery Mario.
We're sunk!
Sinking isn't sunk Luigi.
Woah!
Are we sunk now?
Not if we jump.
Ya lost your landlubbin' mind?
We're tied to the mast!
[grunts]
Yo ho!
Leapin' lasagna, it worked!
Come on, let's get jumpin'!
Yo ho, yo ho, yo ho.
Once more gang!
Yo ho, yo hoooo!
[crash]
Ouch!
[parrot caw]
Whoaaa!!!
Quick Patches!
Give me one of those Starmen
before these Trouters filet
our souls!
[parrot caw]
Starman, star bright,
vive me Starman pasta power,
give me pasta might!
Faster than a vanishing clog!
More powerful than an
electric drain snake!
It's Super Mario!
Shiver me timbers!
Yikes!
Creeping calamari!
Get lost, Trouters!
Way to go Mario!
Excuse me Captain, but
we're gonna have to cast off.
She's not much, but
she sure beats swimming.
[cheering]
[Koopa:] But everyone is
here in your honor my precious
Princess.
Sorry to disappoint you, but I
don't fit in with this kind of
crowd!
[laughs]
These scurvy
scoundrels won't care!
You're disgusting, Koopa!
Mean, cruel-hearted,
vicious, and uncivilized.
Aren't I though?
But enough of this sweet talk.
Listen close you
repulsive wretches!
It's time to play,
Auction the Princess!
[laughs]
Do I hear one
thousand gold coins?
Remember, the money goes to
my favourite charity: Me.
[laughs]
Thar she be, Pirates Port.
[parrot caw]
Time to save the Princess,
from that stoopa Koopa,
while I'm supa.
Uh oh!
Now how do we save her?
We got no ship, no
cannons, no weapons.
We got three
men, one Mushroom,
and a parrot against
their five hundred.
We can't beat 'em, Mario!
If you can't
beat 'em, join 'em,
then beat 'em.
You sure about this?
Sure as spumoni!
Don't you
recognize Captain Kidder?
And, Long John Spaghetti!
[laughs]
Ah sure mates, sure.
You're-you're-you're-you're
mean lookin' barnacles.
This'll never work!
Avast!
Back off buckswashlers!
Make room for the baddest
pirates in the Caribbean!
Easy as pizza pie.
See if you can sneak
up to the Princess.
[gulp]
Sink another ship!
Raid another port!
[laughs]
This princess is worth
more than that measly bit!
[cheering]
Remember Luigi,
you gotta act tough.
I'll take a milk.
[gasp]
In a dirty glass.
Do I hear a million gold coins
for this fair maiden of the
sea?
I bid a billion!
A billion?
Ha!
Sold to the puny pirate
with the hideous hair,
for a billion gold coins.
[cheering]
I'm rich, rich,
filthy, stinking,
mouthwatering rich!
Huh?
Whoa!
Holy macaroni!
Hey!
Woo whoa, woo whoa!
[gasp]
You!
You miserable Mario Brothers!
[cheering]
Ahh!
Oompf!
Take that you
black-hearted pirate!
Run maties, run!
Don't just stand there
you pathetic dunderheads!
Let's get 'em!
[kaboom]
Whoa!
Whoa!
[grunting]
Whoa!
[gasp]
Oompf!
[parrot caw]
Ahhh.
[grunting]
Wooooah!
I'll be back to sink yooooou!
We sure sent
Blackbeard Koopa sailing.
[laughing]
How was I supposed to
know it was a trophy?
Does this look
like a trophy to you?
Well not now
it don't you meatball.
Would you hurry up?
Magic is gonna slam
dunk me for sure.
Come on Mario, come on.
Stay cool Luigi, leave
this one to your big brother.
Alright.
Over there little brother.
Oh oh oh Mario, he's back.
Ok you fix it, I'll stall.
Alright do it good though.
Hey Magic!
You here to recruit me?
Actually--
Watch this.
Great, hey listen, is
your brother around?
I came to pick up.
It won't be long now Magic.
Good, you got five minutes.
One more, over there.
Luigi, what should I do
to stall Magic Johnson?
I know, show him some scenes
from the next Legend of Zelda.
He'll love it!
Oh, wow.
This is the
Triforce of Wisdom Link,
the evil Wizard Ganon
has the Triforce of Power.
[laughs]
Whoever gets both
Triforces will rule this land
forever, you
must help me Link!
Hey for you Zelda, anything.
Link will rescue
me, he always does,
it's his job.
Link?
[laughs]
He's spider food by now.
Ganon put a spell on me,
prepare yourself for a shock.
[screams]
You're a frog!
[screams]
[gasp]
What is this?
Ugly people day?
Buzz off Fairy or
I'll use ya for bait.
Ganon put this spell on me,
and I gotta get back to my old
self.
The cure is simple: you
must be kissed by a Princess,
of her own free will.
[gulp]
You call that simple?
Do you know how long I've been
trying to get Zelda to kiss
me?
And that was when I
didn't look like a frog.
[ribbit]
I sure hope Zelda'll do
it; I don't want to be a frog
forever!
Don't worry, don't
worry, don't worry,
I remember exactly what
the trophy looked like.
Ahh, all done.
Whoa!
Player of the Year?
It looks great Luigi!
It does doesn't it?
Wow.
Guys, guys, I really
got to get rollin'.
Ok Mag, we're
comin', we got it.
Wait 'til you see this.
Here you go big
guy, good as new.
Yea, just like new,
but it's not my trophy.
It's not?
No, I didn't bring my
Player of the Year trophy,
I brought my bowling trophy.
Oh no.
Look Mag, I can't lie
anymore, something
happened to your trophy.
What?
Maybe you should sit down and--
Yea, why don't you have a little
spaghetti sauce it'll help
relax ya.
Hold on a minute I'll get it.
I get it, you're
just kidding me right?
Yea right we're kidding.
There it is, how'd
you get it so shiny?
I used it to stir
the spaghetti sauce.
Ahh, just a little
magic of our own.
Hahaha.
You guys are champs,
this bowling trophy is my
favourite.
How much do I owe you?
Oh hey, no charge for you Mag.
Wow, thanks guys.
Later.
Phew.
Well, gotta finish
my shaving where's,
my favourite shaving mug?
Uh ohhhh!
Uh oh?
Oh hey it's for you,
player of the year.
My shaving mug?
'Til next time everybody!
Do the Mario!
Do the Mario!
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go!
Do the Mario!
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
You've got it!
It's the Mario!
Do the Mario!
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go!
Do the Mario!
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
Come on now, it's
just like that! ♪