Hotel Transylvania: The Series (2017) s01e20 Episode Script

1 Take cover.
Uncle Gene, what are those things? Invisibulls.
Do you mean invisibles or invisibulls? Exactly.
Whoa.
I knew it.
The stench blossom is in bloom.
The stank attracts the bulls and makes them glow.
- But can we stop them? - Oh, yes we can.
It's the Night Warts! Threat neutralized.
Let's take these bulls to the dungeons.
Ooh.
I think I know what I want to do with my afterlife.
Whoo-hoo! Yeah-yeah! Someday we'll be sacks, Wendy.
Oh! You meant trying out for the Night Warts? Sure.
That's cool too, I guess.
Attention! I am Commander Tammy "Poison Apple" Skerrit, leader of the Night Warts.
And you are here because you think you have what it takes.
Yeah.
I'm actually here to be a sack.
I'm just here for the free lunch.
Actually, we're all here to support Wendy.
It's her after-lifelong dream to be a Night Wart.
Yes, thank you.
But you didn't all have to come.
I'll have a much better chance of making it by myself.
Oh, don't worry.
We're just doing this for moral support.
I mean, obviously, I would make it if I tried, but we're just here to help.
And for the lunch.
It's not you guys I'm worried about.
It's just sometimes You know Mavis.
She can get sort of crazy competitive.
I know, right? Let's do this! Can I continue here? Of course.
We're dying to hear about the lunch options.
Ugh.
For the next seven grueling days, you will prove your worth in a series of elaborate training exercises known as Spell Week.
Our job is to keep hotel air space clear of all threats, and we do that by training in our pride and joy.
Ugh.
Seriously? A flight simulator? I mean, no offense, but I've been flying for, like, my whole life.
Right.
Because you can turn into a bat, you think you can fly.
Faster than any of you.
Race you to the human house? If I win, I get out of flight training.
Mavis, maybe you ought to Aye.
Deal.
On your mark, get set, go.
Ooh.
Did that really just Oof.
Oh.
Now it's on.
You got to feel the burn but keep your head No fear 'cause you're already dead Some things are better left unsaid 'Cause now you're flying a broom 'Cause now you're flying a broom But they're getting it now Still airborne somehow Until Mavis blows by with a head of steam She's out for number one and not the team Wait, I thought that it was Wendy's dream! To be flying a broom To be flying a broom And now for no reason beach volleyball Mavis orchestrating her friend's downfall And now Hank's butt has gone AWOL This isn't flying a broom Why is Mavis flying a broom? That was a song about brooms Welcome, recruits, to the pinning of the broom.
I will now fix a pin to all new members of the Night Warts.
- First up, Mavis Dracula.
- Ooh.
And next - Why? - Because no one else made the team! - Mavis? - Uh There must be a mistake.
This is Wendy's afterlife-long dream.
Don't worry, Wendy.
I've got a hotel to run, so you can just have my spot.
There will be no taking spots.
Recruit Dracula will be serving her term or will be labeled a deserter and will face severe consequences.
How could you? Wendy, don't go.
I didn't mean to be chosen over you.
It's just that I'm so good.
That came out so wrong.
Come back.
So, level with me.
You just smash those pins 'cause it's fun, right? I knew it.
I can't believe the Night Warts chose me over Wendy.
Ridiculous.
You do sort of have this thing where you have to prove that you're the best at everything.
I Well, yeah.
I mean, my dad does push me to always strive for greatness.
And that's awesome, but you didn't want to join the Night Warts.
It was Wendy's thing.
We were supposed to help her, not prove that you're better.
So, what you're saying is that I need to show the Night Warts that I'm the best at not being as good as Wendy, right? Uh, I don't think so? Exactly.
Okay, here's the plan.
Uh, this is where they're keeping the invisibulls? How are we supposed to know if it's the right dungeon? Only one way to find out.
Huh.
Nobody home, I guess.
Hey, let's go get a bite to Whoa! Well, on the bright side, the map was bang-on.
Listen.
I know you're mad at me.
Grrr.
Adorbs.
But it turns out the first ceremony was, uh, a setup.
Yeah, to see how truly dedicated you are to the Warts.
Really? A setup? That's right.
I'd never steal a spot from you.
The Warts want to see how you bounce back from that and handle a real threat in action.
Me, handle a real threat? But where are the Night Warts? Let's just say they're, uh, preoccupied.
Sure was nice of Mavis to comp us at the spa while she takes watch.
What? Okay, Wendy.
Game time.
They must have let out the whole herd.
Wow.
They must have more faith in old Wendy than I thought.
No! Run! What are we doing? The Warts won't let me join if I run from a fight.
Uh, the Warts didn't set this up.
I thought if you caught an escaped invisibull while I was on watch, they'd let you take my place.
But then these guys obviously let too many bulls out of the dungeon.
I'm sorry, Wendy.
I don't mean to get so competitive.
You're my best friend.
I'd never do anything to hurt you.
I know you wouldn't.
Well, at least I get to watch the Night Warts kick some butt saving the hotel again.
Yeah.
Um, about that But if all the Night Warts are out of action, who will save us? Well, technically, not all the Night Warts are out of action.
That's right.
This time, we're going to do it as a team.
Hey! Oh, sorry, guys.
But if Spell Week taught me anything it's that I need to prove my own worth.
Wendy, wait.
Stop.
It's Wendy time.
Aren't you going to say anything? No.
Uh, I got nothing.
Ugh.
Hey, ghost beefs! Over here.
I can't believe you could be so irresponsible.
What is she doing? Wendy, no! Whoo-hoo.
Wendy! Get a whiff of this.
Go, Wendy! She's doing it.
The invisibulls are following her.
Now we just have to round them up.
But we don't have a sack anywhere near big enough to catch them all.
You do now.
Great work, recruit.
Now we seal the deal.
Lure the bulls to that window and bail at the last second.
Got it? You bet.
Pull up, recruit.
Pull up, pull up! Sack it to me, baby.
Yes! Welcome to the team, recruits Hank, Pedro and Wendy.
And for gross negligence, insubordination, abandoning a post and even a little treason Mavis Dracula, not only are you dishonorably discharged, but we're taking back all the warts we gave you.
What? You gave me actual warts? Ew.
Sorry, Commander.
I love the Night Warts, but I could never be on a team that won't have my best friend as a member.
Hey.
You were right about stomping on those pins.
That was sweet! Ugh.
Yes, Diane.
I'm eating a hard-spoiled egg.
I'm a monster.
Deal with it.
Transylvania, we have a problem.
We're losing guests to that Weird Jester Motel.
Their occupancy is going through the roof.
Ooh, Daddy, your miming is really improving.
Miming? What's that? I get it.
You got him out of the box.
Hi, Mavis.
Hi.
Oh, right.
I hate to mime and mosey, but we're going to be late for ah-ah-ah class at the Weird Jester Motel.
Mime class? They have a bunch of classes.
DIY Wart Implantation, Ghoulish as a Second Language.
Ooh, hot yoga.
Wait.
Wendy, don't go to mime class.
Stay here and come to Table Manners with Janice.
Uh Or Xylophone Lessons with Theo.
So sorry.
Voila.
Zis is panflakes a la Quasi, with an extra side of flakes.
I meant Cooking with Quasimodo.
Pardon? Disastrous.
Can you imagine? I mean I do not see what is so funny.
I am a five-scar chef.
Why shouldn't I combine fire, knives, and nincompoops, huh? Because you'd scare them all away.
You wouldn't last a day interacting with guests.
Oh, no? No.
Oh, no? No.
I never back down from a challenge.
Cooking with Quasimodo is a go.
Yes! Boom drac-alacka! Mavis saves the day.
You may do it.
If you succeed it is good for the hotel, and I may claim all credit.
Totally not fair, but okay.
But fail, and we'll let the dungeon rats give you both manicures.
I shall look forward to watching this bloodbath.
Joke is on you.
I do not bathe.
- Ugh! - What? Okay.
Aunt Lydia has already booked your first class an hour from now.
She obviously thinks we're going to fail, so I'm bringing in Hank, Pedro, Wendy and her dad for a test run.
- Try to go easy on them.
- Very well.
Bring in the bumbling idiots and the talking jelly molds who are probably just in it for the aprons.
- Ooh, free aprons! - Yes.
All right.
Argh! Let's get cooking.
Now, to begin, you must first learn to beat an egg.
Next, we must pound the dough like this.
And lastly, a pinch of salt.
Ow! What? His name is Salt.
Bah.
Ugh.
Agh! Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Daddy is very sensitive to criticism.
Okay.
Well, here is a criticism, stop being a sniveling baby! If you cannot take the heat, then get out of Quasimodo's kitchen! Um, don't you think you were a tad mean? We have to show Aunt Lydia she's wrong.
So, maybe a little less yelling? A little less yelling? Okay.
I heard it that time.
Going well, I see? No.
It's going great.
Hey, hey! I have never enjoyed myself so much.
Hmm.
Very well.
I shall confirm all of our reservations, then.
Okay.
If this is going to work, you need a personality makeover.
We've got to make you nice, and fast.
But being mean is how you turn lumps of uselessness into chefs.
I forgot to mention, I've been starving the rats all day.
Okay.
Nice it is.
Shouldn't we wait for Wendy? She would kind of love this.
She's still putting her dad back together.
Oh, Daddy.
Eh, what? No, no, no! It is too much.
I have changed my mind.
Quasi, if we're going to make you nice, Tiffany says we need to remove your mean streak.
The mean streak has got to be so repulsed by its surroundings that it just shoots right out.
Sunshine, lollipops, freckles on a froggy.
No, no.
Quick! His mean streak.
Grab it and just yank it out.
Don't let it get away.
Huh? Whoa.
What are you doing there on the floor? You should be sitting on a comfy, cozy sofa instead of resting your little bum-bums on the hard ground.
It worked.
It worked! Yes! Thanks, Tiffany.
'Course, Daddy.
Anything you need.
Grrr.
Ah, cram it, blobbermouth.
Time to trash this dump.
Genial greetings and soothing salutations.
I am Chef Quasimodo.
May I offer you a free apron? I can't believe how well this worked.
Is it too soon to make cash register noises? 'Cause cha-ching.
For you? It's always too soon.
Am I right, Wendy? Wendy? Wendy? Ah.
I guess she's still with her dad.
Argh! An apron for you, and one for you, and one for you, too.
You know, I think this might just be my most successful idea ever.
Aunt Lydia is going to rue the day she dared challenge me.
Rue it! Uh, Mavis? Ah-bup-bup-bup.
Not now, Hank.
I'm imagining how much ruing Lydia is going to do.
I'm guessing zero when she finds out you killed Quasi.
Huh? Wasn't me.
Ah-ah-ah-ah.
This is not good.
His insides are trying to kill him with kindness.
But you can help him, right? Nope.
You did this with magic.
What do you want me to do? Wave a wand and say, "Ka-dabba-ka-blatha-ka-boo" and cure him? Uh, so we have to find Tiffany? And his missing mean streak.
He'll need an infusion, stat.
'Kay.
We need to split up to find them.
Be quick.
Quasi's afterlife depends on it.
Holy rabies.
What happened here? Wendy has the mean streak? I did not see that coming.
I found Tiffany.
I got the mean streak.
I brought a hacky sack.
Let go of me! Who do you ugly monsters think you are? Argh! Aw, she's so cute and squishy.
Easy, Wendy.
We're here to help.
Tiffany, can you save them? What am I, a doctor? Ha! Kidding.
Wand.
Ka-dabba-ka-blatha-ka-boo.
Ha! So I was right.
Get it off.
Get it off! What are you all staring at? Paint a portrait.
It'll last longer.
Ooh.
I'd love a portrait.
Yes! We did it.
Now, we just need to reset Quasimodo again before Aunt Lydia shows up and What is going on in here? Uh Well, look who is back.
The apron-loving phony chefs.
I wouldn't serve your food to my worst enemy, which is you! Oh, no.
Bad riddance.
I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.
Cooking classes with Quasimodo are hereby canceled.
Manicures for two, however, begin in one hour.
It tickles.
They love my cooking.
Yeah.
It's too bad the class didn't work out, but then again, if this is the punishment, I should mess up more often.
Thanks, Aunt Lydia.
You know what? We should offer manicure classes with Esmeralda.
I love it.